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s t h g i L Little One I see the light, accompanied by screams of a woman who’s voice I’m familiar with. She’s been talking to me, caressing me from the outer shell and all I could respond with are kicks and movements of my body. Something is pushing me forward, closer to the light... What’s causing this? a rush of wind hit the top of my skull, giving me chills. A pair of hands grabbed me by my sides and rolled me onto a soft cloth-like surface. By that time, the rays of light was shining onto me, I’m not at a new environment, new atmosphere. It feels somewhat good yet chaotic. This woman who was holding wasn’t one who I expected, not my mother, not her touch nor her voice. I closed my eyes for what felt like an eternity, when I opened them, I’m engulfed by the calming aroma and feeling of my mother’s arms.

lls i h C Cold

The wind gave me chills, the cold air striking right through my bones, yet the sunlight was radiating heat. It was cold yet humid. Stepping on some white sand, it sinking with every step I take. Wearing 3 layers of clothing was not enough, which is weird. Back at home, 1 layer is more than enough. Smiling to myself the comfort of the jacket hugging me makes me feel in place while the atmosphere is gulping my sadness down. All that’s left of me right now is happiness and the want to jump into the light blue sea, it being so inviting is surprising considering I have never seen a sea as homey as this, used to the seas in Indonesia being all dark, giving off a sick dark vibe. Anyway, I wiggled my little left foot to shake off my shoes and did the same treatment to my right. I run fast, cutting through the wind and halted in a stop as I stand infront of one of God’s masterpiece. After dipping my right toe in I received goosebumps all over my body and shivered lightly. My teeth started to chatter, as I violently start to put my shoes back on, after socks of course. After that, I went back to jumping around in the sand and left a few hours after that.

After we arrived there, cheers were already going on from inside the dome and the outside is so empty and quiet that you could hear a pin drop (if someone were to drop it). I sprint towards the gates, which are dirty and dingy but that didn’t bring me down. I finally got the chance to put my butt down and relax, watching the whole 4-1 action which Arsenal won agains Malaysia’s national team.

! n o Kick Today was a special day, holding tightly onto two pieces of paper I glanced down to my watch not wanting to be late. I’m sitting by the front, looking to my left and right nervously taking in this new environment,”Why am I so nervous? This was not my first time...” I questioned myself. There’s awkward silence present in the car, it was so thick that you could cut through it with a knife. It felt like miles and miles before the car came to a sudden halt, unable to look through the window for what seems like a strap holding me down and it tightens as I move. I tried listening to sense whats happening, the silence in the car disappeared, a wave of honks slicing through it. I try once more to look through the window and the straps let me go as I peek through the glass and the view that I see has confirmed my thoughts, traffic jam. “Oh no, this is not happening to me…” And to my surprise, after 15 minutes we arrived at a empty parking lot. Which was about 25 minutes away from the Bukit Jalil stadium by foot, the walk (with combinations of jogs and runs) drains out about 75% of my energy which is saying a lot.


! k c i Cl

Standing nervously in front of the barrier with my first DSLR camera in hand isn’t a good feeling. How very nerve wrecking, having the pressure to take a view that I’m gifted with, within the 15 minutes (3 songs) out of an hour and thirty minutes or so that was proved by the lanyard hanging on my neck, a pass resting on my chest. The light strobes dancing around the room freely, filling up the dark room with colourful light. The large space filled up with people behind the barrier as if they just appeared or fell from the sky. A man interrupting with a brusque manner shouted through the microphone, hinting that it has started. The crowd went wild pushing against the lined barrier as if they were in jail wanting to break through. Thankfully I’m not included, the slippery surface I’m standing on has somehow held me on it’s ground, I punched in a few buttons and rotated a few rolls to have my camera all prepared. Continuation

As soon as Martin (the main singer) started singing and everyone chorusing with him I somehow lose myself through the eyepiece of my canon, it reflecting light and through my lens. No flashes are allowed in order to not distract the band and all I heard was clicks. Three songs is all it takes to take thousands of lovely pictures, and it all ends there. I walk away with pride looking up and filled with joy as if the whole world have blessed me with their prayers to be happy.

de! i R t to n a W

That day the atmosphere was light, everything was just right. With all the energy and bravery I could muster, I got on my bike with shaky hands grasping onto the rubbery handlebars with my sweaty hands. The seat felt weird too! It’s rock hard, making it difficult to sit on. I tried to push my legs further so that the gears would move but it resulted in me losing my balance and falling flat on my face, scraping my knees and some on my cheeks also on my legs. Random scratches kissed me all over which was the cause of trying this failure movement several times, it only left a few patches of non-ruined skin here and there.


I walk with my bike on my side looking for another spot as I see a road with a slight slope and it goes downhill. I looked down in fright and hold everything and anything I’m grabbing on, screaming my dear life away and forcefully pushing my legs down and forward in order to move the bicycle, after that I continue my journey on a long-straight-pathway, with my bike, me riding my bike, after a long wait.


Past, present, all mixed up.