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17th December 1957 to 1st March 2010 ABSENT WITHOUT LEAVE FOR THE EXPAT IN ALL OF US What’s happening, and might be happening, in and around Hua Hin

Race to page 17 for more information! 032 547 199 (Office) or 081 817 3000 (Mobile)

Good News and Bad For Hua Hin Barhops

hua hin, thailand A flurry of changes affecting the bars of this area, and beyond, brings some good and some bad news to the bar business and its patrons. The good news, for Danish beer lovers in particular, is that Carlsberg is making a return in draught form to selected outlets in the area. Carlsberg disappeared from Thai drinking establishments several years ago, despite being, and possibly because it was a dominant force in the beer market. Possibly the best comeback in the world is due to happen in two to three months time, as the beer will be imported from Malaysia, according to our source at the Lost Cafe in Khao Takiab, who plan to stock the beer. The unfortunate contrasting bad news is that there is a strong possibility that Guinness, available

in several places in the area, may become in short supply, as the contract for the existing distributor has apparently expired, while the new distributor has yet to get their hands on any of the black stuff, although fortunately there was plenty available for St Patrick’s Day last Wednesday! Another slightly less worrying piece of news concerning bar life is that the satellite that shows the South African Supersport

channel is shutting down on 31st May, leaving rugby and cricket enthusiasts potentially stranded. However, Lost Cafe, who brought us this news, has announced at the same time that they will be taking up the slack by installing a new high definition system showing most sports, including, hopefully the World Cup in English. Watch this space!

INSIDE AWOL Balloon chasers JBC Sudoku English corner Khao Takiab Capello sets target

19 March 10

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Parties, special offers, regular events, celebrations and more; if you want it in AWOL email info@awolonline.net or contact Noi at Sabai Bar (Tel: 086 174 6165) by Wednesday noon every week. You can also join hua hin, thailand the AWOL forum at www.awolonline.net/forum and post details of Many expats in the town will events there. already have heard about the British man, Keith Burbage, who This week and coming soon was savagely beaten as he arrived Lost Cafe, Khao Takiab 99 baht pizzas until Saturday 20th March at the condominium he was staying Regular Events in. Reports suggest that the attack Daily specials at Belga Cafe & Brasserie was in connection with a property Everyday Happy Hour at Headrock 10am - 8pm (to 2am Mon & Fri) deal which he is going to court over, - 55 baht all beers/selected spirits trying to reclaim a £40,000 deposit; Fridays - Dizzy Dolphin Karaoke/ Live music alternate Fridays (ad p Mr Burbage was due in court last 24); Dick’s Office open darts 7.30pm (ad p 21); Ye Olde Buffalo Tavern, week, and the attack occurred in live music with Khun Tom from 7pm (see ad p 6) the week before that. Saturdays - Beach Hut Bar (ad p 11) live band weekly; Ye Olde Buffalo Many believe that the attack was Tavern, live music with Khun Tom from 7pm (see ad p 6) intended to kill Mr Burbage, and Sundays - British style Sunday Roasts available at: that he was only saved by passers Lin’s Cafe, Phetkasem Road between Soi s 80 &78 - Roast Beef Dinners by coming to his aid, scaring off the Every Day (ad p 4); attacker, who as well as slicing the Jungle Juice, Soi Selekam (ad p 20); face of Mr Burbage with a knife, Dick’s Office, Soi 80 (ad p 21); also beat him on the ground with Ye Olde Buffalo Tavern, Chomsin Rd (ad p 6) what appeared to be a baseball bat. Scandic Bar, Cha Am, open darts evening from 7.30pm . FREE return AWOL is trying to find out more transport from Dick’s Office departs 7pm - please call 089 745 3992 information on the attack and (Anne) or 089 894 4310 (Mack) 3 hrs before to book transport the court case, and will bring it to you when we have solid information. Please email us on info@awolonline.net if you have pertinent facts concerning this attack.

Notes from the British Consular Correspondent

Elgar £20 note no longer legal tender. As of June 30 this year a £20 note with Sir Edward Elgar on the reverse will no long be legal tender, so time to check your wallets. You can check the report from the Daily Telegraph at http:// www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/ personalfinance/consumertips/ banking/7397202/Elgar-20-noteno-longer-legal-tender.html If you are a British Citizen it is recommended that you register your name and address with the FCO, their website is https:// www.locate.fco.gov.uk/ Steve can be contacted by phone on 086 7933461 or by e mail steve@ ketteringham.com 2

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Play with Maria Whittaker Maria Whittaker from West London is the next of our former Page 3 beauties. Made her debut in The Sun in 1985, Maria soon became one of the most popular models to appear in the feature and was named “Page 3 Girl Of The Year” in 1989. In 1987, she appeared on the cover of Palace Software’s computer game, Barbarian, along with Michael Van Wijk (aka ‘Wolf’) from the Gladiators television show. Maria was also the star of Maria Whittaker’s X-Mas Strip Poker, a computer game released in 1988 for the Commodore 64 and 128. Before breaking into modelling, Maria appeared as a Hill’s Angel in two episodes of the The Benny Hill Show (1983). In 1986, she appeared in the movie version of Whoops Apocalypse. She made her second screen appearance in the film Tank Malling in 1989. Maria was also a singer with the band The Rhythm Zone, and in 1990, she turned her back on modelling to make an attempt at a music career, with a solo single called “Stop Right Now”, which unceremoniously flopped. She soon returned to modelling, doing nude pictorials for Mayfair magazine.

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Weather, Money, Information brought to you by Local Forecast

Day Conditions Temp °C Low High Saturday Mostly sunny 25 34 Sunday Abundant sunshine 24 34 Monday Partly sunny 25 34 Tuesday Mostly sunny 25 35 Wednesday Sunny and hot 26 36 Thursday Sunny 26 35 Friday A blend of sun and clouds 24 33

World Forecast

Friday 19th March 2010 City Min Max Weather Amsterdam 5 18 Cloudy Athens 5 16 Fine Auckland 15 22 Cloudy Beijing -3 10 Cloudy Berlin 4 14 Cloudy Buenos Aires 18 26 T-Storms Chicago 6 19 Fine Copenhagen 1 6 Cloudy Dubai 21 33 Clear Dublin 9 14 Rain Geneva 1 15 Fine Helsinki 0 2 ?Snow Ho Chi Minh 23 36 T-Storms Hong Kong 22 25 Clear Islamabad 17 34 Clear Jakarta 24 33 Rain Jerusalem 7 11 Rain Jo’burg 15 28 T-Storms Karachi 20 36 Fine Kuala L’pur 24 33 T-Storms London 7 15 Bright Madrid 6 16 Rain Manila 25 33 Cloudy Mexico City 10 21 Rain Moscow -14 -3 Snow New Delhi 18 36 Fine New York 9 19 Fine Oslo -1 4 ?Snow Paris 7 18 Cloudy Perth 17 28 Ptly Cldy Phnom-Penh 27 35 Sctd Clds Rio 20 30 T-Storms Riyadh 19 36 Clear Rome 4 14 Cloudy San F’cisco 11 21 Fine Singapore 25 33 T-Storms Stockholm 1 4 ?Snow Sydney 18 28 Fine Tokyo 5 13 Cloudy Vientiane 22 33 Sctd Clds Yangon 25 37 Sctd Clds Zurich 0 16 Fine

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Exchange Rates

At Thursday 18th March 2010 (mid-market rates) Currency Value (Baht) US Dollar 31.15 Pound Sterling 48.6 Euro 43.75 Japanese Yen 35.07 Malaysian Ringgit 8.97 Singapore Dollar 22.79 Brunei Dollar 22.25 Chinese Yuan 4.2 Indonesian Rupiah 2.05 Indian Rupee 0.61 Korean Won 0.0241 Australian Dollar 29.16 New Zealand Dollar 22.59 Swiss Franc 30.07 Danish Krone 5.69 Norwegian Krone 5.31 Swedish Krona 4.35 Canadian Dollar 31.28 UAE Dirham 7.06 Bahrain Dinar 57.72 Omani Rial 56.9 Qatar Riyal 6.95 AWOL makes no warranties, express or implied, regarding these rates and shall not be liable for any losses or damages incurred in connection with them.

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Lin’s Cafe

‘noted for fresh air and fun’

Lin’s Cafe

Open Every Day from 7.30am Big Breakfasts - Low Price Roast Beef Dinner only 160 bt Tel: 082 2512473 Phetkasem Road, near Soi 80

Useful Numbers

Emergency Calls Police 191 Crime 195 Fire 199 Traffic Control Centre 197 Highway Police 1193 Tourist Police 1699 Tourist Service Centre 1155 Missing Persons 02 282 1815 Hua Hin Police Station 032 511 027 Cha-Am Police Station 032 471 321 Hua Hin Hospital 032 511 743 San Paulo Hospital 032 532 576 to 585 Hua Hin Red Cross 032 512 567 Other numbers Hua Hin Tessabahn 032 511 047 Hua Hin Immigration Office 032 513 574 Hua Hin Bus Terminal (non air-con) 032 511 230 (air-con) 032 511 651, 512 543 Hua Hin Railway Station 032 511 073 Tourist Information Centre 032 512 120 Hua Hin Electricity 032 512 215 Hua Hin Water 032 511 677 TOT 032 519 000/001 TT&T 032 532 018 British Embassy Consular Correspondent: Steve Ketteringham 086 7933461 or e-mail on steve@ketteringham.com Hua Hin Sky Web Radio 98.5 032 526398


English corner

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Do you wonder why we say certain things, or what they really mean? Each week we will examine a different word or phrase and telly UK Sausages, Ham, you how it came about. Bacon, Pies, Teas etc. This week it is... On your tod Call 087 155 7737 or 089 985 7473 On your own. This is one of the best-known examples of Cockney rhyming slang (on your tod -> on your Tod Sloan -> on your own). It’s a common device of rhyming slang to use the name of a popular celebrity. James Forman (Tod) Sloan was born in Indiana in 1874 and overcame neglect and poverty in his early life to become a highly successful jockey. Initially rejected by his parents, his life changed when he discovered his talent as a jockey and began to win prestigious and lucrative races. His success was based on the short-stirrup style of riding, sitting high on the horse’s neck, which he developed himself - called the ‘monkey crouch’. Despite his start in life as an uneducated and malnourished street urchin, Sloan lived the American dream by becoming one of the world’s best-known sportsmen. He adopted the name Todhunter and embarked on a flamboyant lifestyle, complete with fast cars, adoring women and a personal valet. George M. Cohan’s song The Yankee Doodle Boy, from the show Little Johnny Jones, was based on Sloan’s life: I’m a Yankee Doodle dandy, A Yankee Doodle, do or die; A real live nephew of my Uncle Sam’s, Born on the Fourth of July. I’ve got a Yankee Doodle sweetheart, She’s my Yankee Doodle joy. Yankee Doodle came to London, Just to ride the ponies, I am a Yankee Doodle boy. Having won all there was to win in America, Sloan turned his attention to England - then the epicentre of the racing establishment. In 1897 he was engaged by the Prince of Wales as his principal rider. Sloan was initially ridiculed for his riding style and was called ‘monkey jockey’ by the English press. He continued his winning ways though and a considerable tide of resentment grew against his success, but also against his brashness and allegations of his illegal betting on his own races. He was personally disliked by many of his acquaintances as his lack of social graces often lead to him being considered rude and disdainful. Sloan’s fall from grace was as spectacular as his previous success. Following pressure the steward of The Jockey Club, the sport’s controlling body, The Prince of Wales dismissed him. In December 1900, The New York Times reported that: “Now the Prince of Wales has thrown him over no English owner is likely to employ him.” He was later informed by The Jockey Club that he “need not apply for a licence” for the 1901 season due to unspecified “conduct prejudicial to the best interests of the sport”. There were allegations of jealousy and antiAmericanism in the US press. These were no doubt justified but it seems that the primary motivation was that they just didn’t like him. Whatever the cause, the racing ban was upheld in America too and his career was effectively over. After some ill-fated attempts to open businesses and break into film acting, Sloan faded from public view. He was married and divorced twice but died alone, of cirrhosis, in 1933. It is rather poignant that Sloan’s name should have become synonymous with solitude. Both his early and late life seem lonely and depressing. In his autobiography, called with some feeling ‘Tod Sloan by Himself’, he wrote of his sadness at being abandoned by his long-dead parents - “I was left alone by those I have never ceased to grieve for”.

What

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Bars and Pubs

Beach Hut Bar (p11) Beer O’clock Club (p11) Bob and Noks (p11) Boapa’s Place (p23) Bobby’s Bar (p23) Dick’s Office (p21) Dizzy Dolphin (p24) Jungle Juice (p 20) Lolitas (p14) Lucky Shot (p20) Phoenix Bar (p7) Play Sports Lounge (p3) Railway Tavern (p9) Sabai Bar (p10) TNT Bar (p2)

Restaurants and Food

British Breakfast Foods(p5) Buffalo Tavern (p6) Hua Hin Ham & Bacon (p1) Kom Hom (p15) Lin’s Cafe (p4) Lost Cafe (p11) Victoria II (p15)

Activities and Services

Construction Gang (p14) The Dartman (p22) Go Kart Hua Hin (p1/ 17) Grand Sport (p14) J.B. Consultancy (p7) Observer Group (p15) Siam Consulting (p11)

Property

Curly’s Bar (p16) Khao Takiab Bar (p11) Nong Kha Land (p17) Perfect Land (p20) Property Marketplace (p8) Sam Roi Yod House (p19)

Miscellaneous

Hutsadin Elephants (p15) Restaurant Fittings (p14) Do you want to advertise your business in AWOL? Email us at sales@awolonline.net or call us on 081 649 8361

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Public House and restaurant

SOME ITEMS FROM OUR NEW MENU COMING SOON: Pan-fried Fillet of West Coast Flounder with a Fresh mango salsa Pan-Seared Duck Breast with an Orange reduction Glaze or homemade Hoisin sauce & egg noodles Slow-roasted chicken breast on a bed of Thai herbs and infused With Rosemary gravy Homemade panacotta & wild berries or French Crepes & fresh strawberry Jus

Come along with this advert between 6-7.30 pm during the week of Monday 22nd March –Friday 26th for a free sample of any of the above dishes cooked by our new 5* trained Chef Tan. Live Music every Friday and Saturday evenings from 7.15 pm Luxurious suites overlooking the beach, large outside sun terrace and free WIFI

Located on the corner of Chomsin/ Naresdamri rd by the fishing pier Ample parking nearby For bookings or more information call 032 530087 or 086 603 5335

Weird News New Jersey, USa

Police hunt ‘The Midnight Knitter’

A guerilla knitter is gradually covering a New Jersey town in brightly coloured wool - and authorities have no clue who the rogue crafter is. An unknown person or persons - dubbed ‘The Midnight Knitter’ by West Cape May residents - is covering tree branches and lamp poles with little sweaters under cover of darkness. Mayor Pam Kaithern says police are looking into the knitted graffiti, which is technically against the law, as it is being done on public property without 6

permission. However, the mayor and many residents admit they’re delighted by the woolly rainbow of colours that has popped up. ‘We don’t know who it is. Technically, they shouldn’t be doing it. The police are asking about it, but it’s fun and it’s a mystery,’ Kaithern told local newspaper The Press of Atlantic City. And she added that she’s not even that keen for police to get to the bottom of the affair. ‘Lets’ keep it a mystery,’ she said. The knitter even has a website, a Facebook page and a MySpace, under the name of ‘Salty Knits’, where they describe themselves as ‘Knitters that got sick of knitting kitten mittens.’ The Facebook page is filled with overwhelmingly positive comments about the undercover needlework. One said: ‘Don’t give in to requests for you all to identify yourselves . . . just keep doing what you’re doing. Mystery is nice.’ The rogue knitter is happy with the attention the woolwork has been getting - but is now concerned that the added attention may make it harder to carry out their work, saying on Facebook a few hours ago: ‘Today has been so crazy. Now we have to figure out how to put new tags up without being spotted!’ Guerilla knitting has been an increasingly widespread phenomenon over the past few years, with yarn enthusiasts taking to the streets of cities around the world to encase parts of them in wool.


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brought to you by J.B. Consultancy Services Each week we will present you with two Sudoku puzzles; an easy one and a hard one. Just fill in the empty squares so that each horizontal and vertical line has all the numbers 1 to 9, as well as each section.

Puzzle 1 (Easy)

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Puzzle 2 (Hard)

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AWOL Sudoku

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Send your jokes to submissions@awolonline.net and get your name in print! 085 429 0378 Brought to you by The Railway Tavern $10,000 to talk to god? An American decided to write a book about famous churches around the world. He bought a plane ticket and took a trip to Orlando , thinking that he would start by working his way across the USA from South to North . On his first day he was inside a church taking photographs when he noticed a golden telephone mounted on the wall with a sign that read ‘$10,000 per call’ . The American, being intrigued, asked a priest who was strolling by what the telephone was used for . The priest replied that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 you could talk to God . The American thanked the priest and went along his way . Next stop was in Atlanta . There, at a very large cathedral, he saw the same looking golden telephone with the same sign under it. He wondered if this was the same kind of telephone he saw in Orlando and he asked a nearby nun what its purpose was . She told him that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 he could talk to God . ‘O.K., thank you,’ said the American . He then travelled all across America , Africa, England , Japan , New Zealand . In every church he saw the same looking golden telephone with the same ‘$US10,000 per call’ sign under it. . The American decided to travel to Scotland to see if Scots had the same phone . He arrived in Scotland and again, in the first church he entered, there was the same looking golden telephone, but this time the sign under it read ‘40 pence per call.’ The American was surprised so he asked the priest about the sign . ‘Father, I’ve travelled all over the world and I’ve seen this same golden telephone in many churches . I’m told that it is a direct line to Heaven, but in all of them price was $10,000 per call . Why is it so cheap here?’ The priest smiled and answered, ‘You’re in Scotland now, son - it’s a local call’ . women Catholic schools I stopped my wife from sucking her Little Zak was doing very badly in maths. His parents had tried thumb, everything...tutors, mentors, flash cards, special learning centers. In I tattooed a cock on it. short, everything they could think of to help his maths. What food takes away 95% of a Finally, in a last ditch effort, they took Zak down and enrolled him in womans sex drive? the local Catholic school. After the first day, little Zachary came home Wedding cake. with a very serious look on his face. He didn’t even kiss his mother hello. How do you stop a woman from Instead, he went straight to his room and started studying. Books and giving you a blowjob? papers were spread out all over the room and little Zak was hard at work. Marry her. His mother was amazed. She called him down to dinner. What do you call a woman who can To her shock, the minute he was done, he marched back to his room suck a golf ball through 50ft of hose without a word, and in no time, he was back hitting the books as hard pipe. as before. This went on for some time, day after day, while the mother Darling. tried to understand what made all the difference. Finally, little Zak brought home his report Card.. He quietly laid it on whoops! the table, went up to his room and hit the books. With great trepidation, The other day my girlfriend put His Mum looked at it and to her great surprise, Little Zak got an ‘A’ in me in a tough situation; she math. She could no longer hold her curiosity. She went to his room and said, “Does my bum look big in said, ‘Son, what was it? Was it the nuns?’ this?” Little Zak looked at her and shook his head, no. Just as I was about to say: “You ‘Well, then,’ she replied, Was it the books, the discipline, the structure, look great”, my inner demon the uniforms? WHAT WAS IT?’ cut in and I said: “To be fair, Little Zachary looked at her and said, ‘Well, on the first day of school it’s a very small room.” when I saw that guy nailed to the plus sign, I knew they weren’t fooling Now that her stuff’s all gone, around.’ the room is actually quite large. 9

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Monkey Your STARS with The Sage my.opera.com/bentrein

brought to you by Litigation has been flying through the air this week as Spanky once again failed to deliver his contractual obligations, giving AWOL no choice but to invoke the Monkey Business penalty clause, which states that “the contractor must run through the red shirted mob shouting ‘Down with Thaksin’”.

Capricorn Dec 22 - Jan 19 All of your questions will be answered this week, moments after the zookeeper, the fire marshal, and the roller-coaster operator all tell you, “No.” Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 The attention is nice and all, but in the end, you put your pants on just like everyone else: One thirty million dollar cybernetic leg at a time. You’ll finally find the answer you’ve been searching for, moments after ruling out A., B., and multiple choice C. Pisces Feb 19 - Mar 20 What’s the matter? Couldn’t find your precious People magazine horoscopes this week? Oh, you want your fortune, do you? Here’s your fortune: Go die, asshole. Aries Mar 21 - Apr 19 Try listening to your body this week. It’s got a bunch of really great stories about hanging out with Jimmy Page. Nightingales are known for their sweet, often melodious song. However, the one outside your window seems way more interested in Dancehall Reggae. Taurus Apr 20 - May 20 Sure, they might blame you now, but how were you supposed to know the waters were unsafe at Everyone Always Gets Killed Beach. Gemini May 21 - Jun 21 After days of searching, you’ll finally find comfort this week. Just above “comforter,” and right below “confit.” Try not to hold onto any animosity you may feel toward your coworkers this week, as that asshole Dave would probably love it if you did.

TA K E I T E A S Y AT

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Cancer Jun 22 - Jul 22 Internal bleeding is usually a sign of serious trauma, so relax, you and your blood-soaked clothes are totally fine. The doctors will soon treat you for an acute case of tuberculosis, but don’t be alarmed: They’re mostly just bored. Leo Jul 23 - Aug 22 By this time next year, you’ll be 400,000 dollars richer, two cars the better, and just as gullible as you are now. Virgo Aug 23 - Sep 22 Sometimes in life you just have to march right in there, introduce yourself, fight off a couple of rather large security guards, and demand a raise. Libra Sep 23 - Oct 23 Remember: Guns aren’t toys. Except for the plastic toy kind. Or the high-powered rifle kind, which you can totally use to have a ton of fun. Scorpio Oct 24 - Nov 21 Speed-dating may not have worked for you in the past, but this time, try it without so much methamphetamine in your system. Your two packa-day habit will finally kill you this week, but then, that’s a lot of wolves to fight off. Sagittarius Nov 22 - Dec 21 Sometimes you wish your kids had come with an instruction manual, but then, that’s the price you pay for getting them second-hand. The stars foresee a time of great uncertainty in the day to come. Also, the stars foresee a time of great covering their collective asses in the days to come.

Relax with an ice cold beer and a friendly welcome from Noi and the girls Get updated on the Hua Hin Golf Society with Kevin Play pool with the many regulars

Open every day from 12 Noon‘Til Late

Find us at 5 Soi Selekam, Hua Hin - from the Hilton go north along Naresdamri Road, take the first left and then the first right, and we are 40 m along on the right

Contact us: Noi 086-174-6165 Kevin 089-913-7926 email kevinmilke@yahoo.co.uk Visit Myanmar - Play golf in the Golden Land Escorted CustomTours - Enquire within 10

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Place

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Visit the village discover Khao Takiab

Property includes the bar and fittings, Kitchen, and seven rooms which are currently used as owner and staff accommodation, with seperate access. Long lease, 10,000 baht a month rent, would suit a couple.

Only 650,000 baht

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SPORTS GUESTHOUSE BAR R E S T A U R A N T

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International Wines, Bottled & Draft Beers Two satellite systems showing live sports Tel 032 511624

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An guide to to local local events events An eight eight days days aa week week guide

Hua Hin Live Don’t Miss This Week

• Intercontinental Kiteboarding World Cup. Saturday 20 March . Final day of competition and closing party. Intercontinental Resort, Petchkasem Soi 79 at the beach. www.pkraasia.com • Eclipse (Drums of Awakening) Dance and Music Performance Saturdays 20 and 27 March, and every Saturday through 1 May. An amazing performance of contemporary drumming, dance and music featuring some of Thailand’s finest operatic and performing talents. Don’t miss it! Vic Hua Hin Theatre, near the Centennial Park on Petchkasem Road in Nongkae. http://www.vichuahin.com. Tel. 032 817 815. • Art Exhibition by Tawee Kesa-Ngam and Family. 1 March to 31 April. Baan Silapin Art & Antiques Gallery and Studio Tel. 03 253 4830. • Parbitar Ensemble. Showcase of original and Experimental Music in Hua Hin. Sunday 21 and 28 March, 2:00 to 4:00 pm. Baan Silapin Art & Antiques Gallery and Studio. Info at tel. 089 181 6328. Free. • Ratibrap Entity, Sound Cloud Performance. Saturday 27 March. Improvised electronic and acoustic music in a unique surround-sound environment . Vic Hua Hin Theatre. http://www. vichuahin.com. Tel. 032 817 815.

Upcoming

• Frappe Music Fiesto 2010. Saturday 3 April. Springfield Village Golf and Spa (between Cha-Am and Hua Hin). 5 International bands, including Incognito from UK, Australia’s The Cat Empire, Paris Match from Japan, Manongo Mujica from Peru, and Tokyo Ska Paradise Orchestra. Doors open 4 pm, music starts at 5:30pm. www.frappemusic.com • Hua Hin Jazz Festival. June (dates to be announced); Likely to be either the 11/12/13 June or 18/19/20 June, but news of this is often late, and often changed at the last minute.

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the hua hin arts guide

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Ongoing

Stage Shows and Special Performances • Cicada Market and Performing Arts Fair. The Venue@Suansri. Friday and Saturday evenings from sunset to 12 pm, Sundays from 4pm; Dining, shopping, art, performances, and films in a beautiful park-like setting. A wonderful place to spend an evening. • SASI Dinner Theatre. SASI Restaurant. Nightly at 7:00 pm, Dinner with Thai Contemporary theatre performance. Recommended. They have their own theatre troupe, who are quite good. • Hua Hin Magic Show, Hilton Hotel. Thursday to Saturday at 8:00 pm; A full professional magic show. Adults 400 Bt. Children 200 Bt. Tel. 083 503 0999 • Cabaret Show, Blue Angel Cabaret. Every night 8pm and 9:46pm. Midnight show on weekends. Something a little different.

Open Jams and Music Showcases

Hua Hin and Cha-Am have an exciting and unique ‘jam session’ scene, where musicians of all countries gather to enjoy playing good music for an appreciative audience. If you haven’t been, you deserve to check out one or more of these weekly parties. • Monday and Thursday Jams at Ray’s Place Restaurant. 8:00 pm; Hua Hin’s original open jam. Thai and farang musicians. Monday’s are packed. Thursday is more relaxed, but also popular. • Wednesday Jam at Chez Lou Lou. 7 - 12 pm. Al fresco open jam, led by the Hua Hin Ensemble. • Sunday Jam at Baan Chang, Cha-am. 8:30 pm to midnight; Open jam session with Norwegian pianist Nissa Nyberget and his house band.

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100 Pipers Band. 100 Pipers Pub. Nightly exc Mon., starts 11 pm; High-energy Thai country and rock. Blues, Country, Popular Music. Bentho’s Bar. Tuesday’s starting at 10pm. Various performers. Classical Guitar with Ricardo Dioso. Marriott Hotel lobby. Tuesdays, 7-10 pm Hua Hin Ensemble. Market Village Shopping Mall. Daily (except Monday) 4 to 8 pm; Modern and vintage jazz by Hua Hin’s own all-Thai quartet, the Hua Hin Ensemble (sometimes with special friends). Jazz with the Hua Hin Ensemble. Rest Detail Hotel. Saturday afternoon from 2 pm. Friday to Sunday evenings 7 to 10 pm; Soft jazz for dining and relaxing. Live Jazz and Popular Music. Dusit Resort. House band play nightly in the Polo Bar, exc.Tues, starts8pm. LukNam Band, LukNam Pub. Thai Country and Rock. Nightly 10pm until very, very late. It rocks. Doctor Jazz and Co. Coco 51 Restaurant. Nightly 7-10 pm; Soft vintage and contemporary jazz. Nissa Nyberget and his band. Baan Chang, Cha-am. Nightly exc Sun (jam session) 6 pm to midnight; Live music/ entertainment/ dancing. Popular, Country, and Oldies. Nokkachan Restaurant and Pub. Nightly from 9pm Ricardo Dioso, Classical Guitar. The Duke’s Restaurant. Nightly exc Tues 7-10 pm. A fine player. Smoriang Band, Smoriang Pub. Thai Country and rock. Nightly 10pm to ?. Great fun, expect a crowd. Stoned Head Band. El Murphy’s Hotel, Irish Bar, and Restaurant. Nightly from 10pm. Classic rock with Hua Hin’s most venerable band. These guys have been around forever, and can really play. Thai Acoustic Music, TauMai Restaurant. Nightly from 7pm. Tunes from talented singers and guitarists.

Venue Guide

100 Pipers Pub. Petchkasem Rd at soi 68. The door is about 60 metres north of the intersection. Baan Chang, Cha-Am. On Soi 9 North, ½ block from the beach. There are signs at the intersection with the beach road, and it’s the only place on the soi. Tel 085 293 4345 / 087 126 9127 Bentho’s Bar, Central Hua Hin. Soi Selakam, heart of the bar district. Stagger about until you find it. Blue Angel Cabaret, Central Hua Hin. Located just off Soi Bintabaht. From the Hilton, proceed down Bintabaht and turn right at the first (no-name) street. The Blue Angel is about 50 metres down on the right. Chez Lou Lou, Central Hua Hin. Next to the 7-11 by the Train Station. Tel 089 008 9484. Email loulouboythai@hotmail.fr Coco 51 Restaurant, Hua Hin north side. Soi 51 at the beach, Hua Hin Tel 032 515597. Dusit Resort. 1349 Petchkasem Rd. Just north of the ‘underpass’ near the airport. Tel. 032 520009. El Murphy’s Hotel, Central Hua Hin. 25 Soi Selakam, at ‘Little 5 Points’ in the heart of the entertainment district. Tel 032 511525 Hi4 Pub. At Hin Nam Sai Suay condominium, Petchkasem Road Soi 7. http://www.hi4pub.co.cc/ Hilton Hotel, Central Hua Hin. Naresdamri Rd in the middle of Hua Hin’s tourist district. Tel 032 538999. Luknam Pub, Western Hua Hin. On the road to Pala U waterfall. Opposite Phoenix Bar. Marriot Hotel. 107/1 Petchkasem Rd. Tel. 032 511881. Nokkachan Restaurant and Pub, Khao Takiab. Khao Takiab road corner of soi 83. Near Hyatt Regency. Ray’s Place Restaurant, Central Hua Hin. On the SE corner of Thanon Sra Song and Thanon Amnuaysin. From the central night market, go to the street crossing in the exact middle of the market ( Thanon Sra Song). Go one block South, towards the road that runs from the train station to the beach. At the intersection, look to the far left corner. Ray’s Place is directly behind the green ‘soldiers box’. Tel 081 880 4211 Rest Detail Hotel. Soi 19 at the beach, near the Queen’s Park, and the 19 Rai. Tel 02 684 1644 Sasi Restaurant, Khao Takiab. Next door to The Venue@Suansri, on soi Khao Takiab 83. Tel 032 512488 or 081 880 4004. Web www. sasi-restaurant.com, email sasi@sasi-restaurant.com. Smoriang Pub, South-Central Hua Hin. In the small soi that runs between San Paolo Hospital and the Grand night market. You’ll find Smoriang on the left, shortly before you hit the railroad tracks. TauMai Restaurant. Petchkasem Rd on the ocean side. Two doors north of Index Living Mall. The Duke’s Restaurant, Hua Hin north side. Soi 51 (aka Damronrat Rd.) at the beach. Just off Naebkehardt Rd. Tel 03 251 5787. www.theduke51,com The Venue@ Suansri, Khao Takiab. On the corner of Khao Takiab Road and ‘Soi Hyatt’ (soi 83). Tel. 080 536 606. www.cicadamarket.net. Email cicada@cicadamarket.net Vic Hua Hin Theatre and Patravadi Performing Arts Center, Nongkae (Southern Hua Hin). An astonishing complex on 30 rai of land just 5 minutes south of Hua Hin center. To get there, proceed south on Petchkasem Road past the Market Village shopping mall. Take the ‘flyover’ to Prachuab Kirikhan and Pranburi. After the flyover, pass the Centennial Park and night market on your right. The entrance is on the right, about 500 metres past the flyover. The sign at the entrance say “Patravadi High School”. The theatre itself is the large black building. Tel. 032 827815.

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Mary’s 13 year old daughter once again shows her Mum how its done this week... DEAR MARY, My husband is a wonderful individual and we have enjoyed several relatively happy years together. The only problem is that he’s very conservative in his tastes and he prefers to have sex in the missionary position with the curtains drawn than try out things that I like doing, such as dressing up in preposterously lewd under-garments and thrashing each other with a leather cat o’ nine tails. I’ve tried to raise the issue with him but he just turns up the volume on Fox News and ignores me. What should I do? Denise, Tha Wang

Relationship woes? Bar girl blues? Sexual deviant? Send your problem to Mary Ann Cotton on submissions@awolonline.net

Dear Denise, I once had a hamster called Hammy who was going to be my bestest friend in the whole world until I realised he was a deeply flawed individual. He was obsessed with going round and round on his wheel for hours on end and whenever I managed to coax

him out of his cage to play with me, all he did was sit there, doing nothing aside from depositing small poops all over my school jumper. My friend Jemima, on the other hand, had a pet puppy called Mika who was millions better than rubbish Hammy. Everyone used to love visiting Jemima and Mika and playing with them in the park after school, while I was stuck all alone watching Hammy sleeping or chewing on cardboard toilet rolls. Naturally, after some time, I decided that he and I should part ways, and I set him free in the garden so I could go and play with Jemima and Mika like all my other friends. When my mummy found Hammy the next day, he was dead, having been savagely mauled by a cat. My mummy said it would teach me a valuable lesson about coping with grief, when in fact the main thing I learned from the experience was that hamsters are rubbish. Your husband sounds like more of a Hammy than a Mika, and the sooner you send him on his way, the sooner you can start to enjoy life.

Restaurant Closing Down Sale

...STOP PRESS!...

All Items Only One Year Old

NEW PRICE SALE PRICE Cake Fridge SOLD! Large Drinks Fridge SOLD! Coffee Machine 65,000 32,000 Large Fridge Freezer 18,000 10,000 Chest Freezer 12,000 6,000 Deep Fat Fryer 24,000 8,000 Gas Hob & Hood 22,000 10,000 Electric Oven 14,000 7,000 8 Circular Glass Tables & 24 Chairs SOLD! (all prices in Thai Baht) Many more smaller items on offer CONTACT PHONE 0895389235 ENGLISH 0870195448 THAI

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RELIABLE, HONEST, TALENTED & HARD WORKING CONSTRUCTION GANG FOUND IN HUA HIN. ANY JOBS UNDERTAKEN, ANYWHERE, FROM LEAKING PIPES TO COMPLETE HOUSES. Contact

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Help the Elephants of this area - many are now unable to be kept by their owners due to ill health, age or being unable to work any more. The Hutsadin Elephant Foundation will take care of these animals but needs both volunteers and donations to do so. Please help these gentle giants, or just visit them at the Foundation on the Pala-U Road.

www.hutsadin.org email: hutsadinhuahin@ hotmail.com.

VICTORIA II

ANNOUNCES THE OPENING OF THE ORIGINAL HUA HIN FISH AND CHIP SHOP

LOCATED ON SOI 80 (SARAWAT) OPENING TIMES ARE 5.30 PM TO 11.00 PM MENU INCLUDES FISH, CHIPS, MUSHY PEAS, PIES, BANGERS IN BATTER, BURGERS, FISH AND SHRIMP CAKES ETC

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13. Cask (6) 16. Mythical bird (3) 17. Fishing boat (7) 18. Duty (10)

TEL 083 109 1156 brought to you by Down 2. Bizarre (9) 3. Disregard (6) 4. Wealthy (4) 5. Nimble (5) 6. Arithmetical operation (4) 8. Lowest female singing voice (9) 11. Empty (6) 12. Freight (5)

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CLASSIFIEDS Business

ATTRACTIVE BAR FOR sale in Soi Selekam. Great location and potential. Pool table, 2 TVs, Darts. Well stocked. Live the life! Price 1.6 Million baht. Phone 084 314 7188. bar for sale, Soi Sarawat 80. consisting of 2 floors,1st floor has bar, pool table, ubc tv, bathroom and a small bedroom,2nd floor big room could make 3 rooms,bathroom and kitchen.just over 7yrs on lease no key money,rent 12,100 pm,increase 10%per year.some repairs to bar floor needed and a paint job hence reduced from 850,000 to 800,000.for more details e mail,eastern_ scotsman@hotmail.com Restaurant / Poolbar for Sale. New restaurant and bar in Soi 94 for sale. Nice terrace, new pooltable inside, flatscreen tv with UBC, stereo. Big kitchen with all appliciances available. Inclusive bar table, chairs etc. 2 enormous bedrooms upstairs (2 floors), 14 meter garden in the back. Proven record business. Only serious offers, all options open, call 087-5289026 Restaurant/bar for sale. Brand new Turnkey business ready for operation as Fish & Chip shop, BBQ Ribs etc. Fully equipped for immediate operation. 22 seats in restaurant and 5 - 6 seats in Bar area. Accommodation comprises 2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms and kitchen. 9 year lease with a 9000 baht per month rent. Sale price is 1.3m baht. Tel. 083 109 1156 (Barrie) Bar for sale Soi Sarakam pool table 2 TVs all in good condition Great location + potential Three rooms upstairs Price 1.9 mill. Phone 084 314 7188 Bar for sale in Khao Takiab, Monkey Mountain beach. Rent paid untilMarch 1st then 4 years remaining at 2700 baht a month. Sale includes all furniture, fridges, fully equiped thai style kitchen, music system, cutlery, crockery, glasses etc, remaining stock, everything ready to open. Great location, just by very busy beach, Golden Buddha and Monkey Mountain so plenty of passing trade, priced for quick sale, 75000 baht. Call 0892596716 (Eng/ Thai) Teerak Wedding Studio - Professional Photography. Teerak Wedding Studio is now opened in Hua Hin! Celebrating its 7th Branch. Expats in Hua Hin/Cha Am can now enjoy our special packages for Wedding, Family, and Fashion occassions. We cover services from Photography, Bridal Make up, Ceremony Photography, Bridal Gowns rental, and many more. For more information, please visit our website www.teerakstudio.com Yoga for your life !!! Come and feel the spirit of yoga in the beautiful location of Hua Hin. Yoga classes held in the morning, afternoon and evenings as you like. The Yoga Instructor will really bring out the essence of yoga and mediation, the union of mind, body and spirit. Breathe is ecologically aware, combining organic ingredients,with an incomparably warm atmosphereIf interested please email : thid_suttha@yahoo.com or call for more info. Thyda S.: 087 - 0146729 BAR FOR SALE Hua Hin Phetkasem Road central position. Good passing trade, 600, 000 Baht, Partnership considered. Phone 085 295 1595 (Steve) Swimming Pool Service Expert swimming service such as cleaning, maintenance, chemical treatment,change spare part etc. contact: mobile phone 086-9977371,email:permsopa_t@hotmail.com

CURLY’S BAR FOR SALE ONLY 850,000 BAHT, OWNER RETIRING

First class modern bar in a prime location on Petchkasem Road, four doors from 7-11, corner of Soi 80, plenty of passing and regular trade. Completely refurbished, everything new. Price includes: Fully equipped kitchen, Pool table, flat screen TV, UBC, Air con, all bar furniture.

Property comprises bar/kitchen downstairs, two bedrooms upstairs (One large, one double with ensuite shower), 30 feet plus lounge with new tiled floor.

Two year renewable lease, rent 20,000 baht per mth paid to July 2010 Please call Terry on 089 8816490

BOAT TOURS FISHING snorkelling tours to suit your needs from 1850 to 2300 baht p/p. Private charter available at very good rates. Call for more details 0837336695 Kannika bar for sale pool table, ps2 game tables, projector TV in Poonsuk rd. 950,000 call 081-378-3436

Employment Qualified Thai Teacher. I am looking for a qualified Thai Teacher who is enthusiastic and has good English. You would be expected to work Monday to Friday 8-5.30pm and would be based at a small Home Learning Centre in Hua Hin. You will work with children aged 4-6 years old and be able to take responsibility for some lessons independently and work alongside the British teacher to provide the curriculum. If you are interested please call Emma 08704 89558 Licensed driver for Toyota Commuter wanted, hotel pick-up and drop, brand new van, drive an average of 20 days a month, from 07h to 18h, only Thai citizen. For conditions call Fred at 0890148546. Part time teachers wanted. We are seeking part-time Native English speaking teachers. Must have credentials. Also seeking Native Thai teachers to teach Thai to English speakers. Age not important. Male or Female. Facility is licensed by Ministry of Education. Email CV with photo to: bapakdon@gmail.com

General MULTI SPORT AQUAGLIDE 4.1 inflatable sailboat, windsurfer, kayak or towable for 2 or 3 people. Brand new, USA made. Currently stored in Hua Hin. For sale, buy everything or individually. 12000 baht or nearest offer. Urgent sale. Contact Jumbo 086 071 6827 or email jumbobkk@hotmail.com Brand new Nokia 6555 flip phone for sale in box with extra battery, unused (unwanted gift) 3,500 baht. Used LG “cookie” touch screen mobile phone for sale, with all original accessories only 9 mos old GWO 2,800 baht. Pls note prices are FIRM. Contact tpigram@gmail.com 087 592 4511 WASHING MACHINE FOR SALE - Samsung 8Kg - 2 Years Old - 4,000 baht - Good Condition - Contact Mick or Mod on 0870 129 615 or 0895 277 343 For Sale - round, wicker and wrought iron table with glass inset, plus four matching chairs. Baht 22,000. Call 0802609600 acoustic 12 string guitar, Tanglewood full size, excellent condition with case and tuner, 15,000 baht ono. Contact Tip on 089 549 0355

Panasonic kx-ft907 fax/answer/ phone etc as new 2000 baht ph Sheila 0810064010 CLARINET FOR SALE. Always wanted to play the clarinet? Here is your chance; Almost new Pearl River Clarinet in the key of Bb features solid ebonite body, power-forged nickel silver keys, nickel silver bell ring, undercut toneholes, traditional sculptured spatula keys, and 17 keys and 6 rings (Boehm system). Includes handy case, clarinet stand, and mouthpiece. A fine instrument in excellent condition, THB 18,500. bamassen@hotmail.com Snorkelling gear, mask, snorkel and fins size 43/44. Bargain 400 baht. Tel. 089-0702423 Watercooler for sale 2nd hand watercooler for sale, holds 40 litres of water. (normal price new 16700 Baht,) will sell for 6000 Baht. Phone no. 0846309925

Motoring honda wave only 11 months old for sale at bargain price! 100cc, blue colour with only9000 km on the clock, just 25,000 baht. Contact 084 314 1138 Suzuki Intruder 750cc for sale. Beautiful bike for sale, year 1994, imported. Kilometer 65.000. Inclusive extra tank and buddyseat. Very well maintained, all bills available. With green book. Price B 149.000. Please call 087-5289026 for more info 18ft Speed Boat For Sale. Made from marine ply berthed at Prak Nan Pran Mariner Pranburi. 40hp outboard motor - trailer - canopy - 6 life jackets + spare fuel container incl 120,000 Bht o.n.o. Any interested buyers welcome to take her out on the water by appointment. Contact Mick 0852973464 Kawasaki ER-6F For Sale. Kawasaki ER-6F 650cc. Imported from Japan. Beautiful bike. New Pirelli tyres, chain and sprockets, recently serviced including book and paperwork. As new. Relucatant sale. 180,000 Baht. Tele : 0816770989. Cars & Pickups wanted for CASH!!!! CASH PAID for all late model (2004/2009) Cars and Pickups,in reasonable condition. Call Udo now :089 667 1312. 1995 Merc C220 Elegance Auto superb original condition 114.000 km every merc extra first to see will buy 565,000 baht. Tel 0861708720 or 0852848059 MOTO BIKES/ SCOOTERS for rent weekly >>>>monthly. Professionally maintained, current models. Competitively Priced Larger Models suit Farangs. Ph 085 3836633 Niyura info@thaihuahin.net bargain! honda steed 400cc. Good condition with book 55,000 baht, Call 088 307 2677

How to place a classified advert in AWOL and AWOLonline: Option 1 - email to classifieds@awolonline.net; Option 2 - write the details clearly in BLOCK capitals on paper and deliver to Noi at Sabai Bar, Soi Selekam; Option 3 - register at www.awolonline.net/classads and place your advert there. All options must be by 6 pm on the Tuesday before the printed issue you want to be included in. All adverts are free and will be included for at least four weeks automatically, except adverts by large companies - please contact sales@awolonline.net. 16


GET RACING FROM ONLY 400 BAHT! OPEN EVERYDAY 10.30AM - 7PM, LATE NIGHT BY APPOINTMENT www.gokarthuahin.com 2007 Toyota Hilux Vigo 4 door Auto Diesel looks and drives like new one owner 87,000 km Met Bronze only 580,000 baht. Tel 0861708720 or 0852848059 Suzuki Swift 2006, Full Service history, New Set Tyres. Made in Japan(was 1.2m new). Excellent condition Inside and Outside. Need to sell as moving to HH. Car in Bkk but will bring down for serious buyer. Drives and Looks beautiful. 400,000thb Contact Wayne at 089 035 6060 3 Honda Clicks for sale, second hand, red, white and a blue, all are taxed and insured for 1 year, they are 2 – 3 years old, prices are 25,000 – 28,000 baht. Please call 0860100200 for more details. Honda Wave 125i 2008 Model, Disc Brake Type Perfect Condition! Used Less 1,200kms. only Sale = 38,000.- Baht, Ready to transfer Call : 087-169-6658 Yamaha virago 400cc prime condition. New tires, newly chromed,newly modified body. Owner needs to go home. 65,000.00 Baht negotiable. Call me! 0877504404 JET SKI FOR sale 150,000 Baht, one owner, Seadoo Bombardier XP Ltd Edition, imported new 2001 from Australia. 135 HPR 950 cc Rotax racing engine, very low hours, comes with trailer + impact jacket. Very fast, good condition. Tel 089 550 8501 Harley PM, 1450cc, 2000 Model, Black, Former Heritage Softail. New design with PM parts & accessories. Reduced to 990,000, call 0860100200. Suzuki DRZ 400, electric start, Yellow, like new, with invoice papers. 140,000 baht call 0860100200. TAXIS BANGKOK AIRPORT Pattaya at very competitive prices. Call Kannika on 0837336695

Personals looking for health cover? Get a free consultation in your home or at our office - just email jeston@jbcthailand.com

Property Probably the last Condo in Hua Hin under one million. Ground Floor unit in Sport Villa, all furniture included, excellent rental potential........... Call Cameron on 089 050 7648 or Fon on 086 047 4161 TIRA TIRAA 1 Bedroom yop floor corner unit. Great ocean and mountain views, balcony, pool and 3 min walk to the night market. As new, asking 2.9 mill baht Freehold title to Westerners. Tel 0831090741 or phildav@telus.net release the equity in your property- Email jeston@jbcthailand.com for a free consultation. Beautiful land for sale. Beautiful 4 Rai and 60 sq/wah plot in a good square shape for a small development or private house. Overlooked by the mountains the land has a lovely breeze rolling off the hills of Black Mountain. Good road access and electric and water are available on site. 5km from Black Mountain golf club and 5km from Hua Hin. Bordered by Royal private land. Very attractive land at a good price...1,500,000 per Rai. Tele : 0816770989 condochain 13th floor one bedroom condominium for sale;kitchen, bathroom, balcony, recently redecorated, 3.6 m baht or near offer. Call Joyce on 085 701 7187. HOUSE FOR SALE. 3br/2baths, large living room, small kitchen and dining room. Huge covered patio [big enough to build small house]. Safe, quiet, no flooding[make sure about this when you buy]. Moving back to USA and must sell. 1.5 million baht; the land is worth 2 million. Call 080 244 6739.

Call 032 547 199 (Office) or 081 817 3000 (Mobile) Soi 2, Phetchkasem Road opposite Hua Hin Airport

available now! off road 4 speed 125cc Fun bikes in two sizes as shown below. Priced at 27,999 and 32,999 baht respectively. Have a test ride at Go Kart Hua Hin - call 032 547 199 (office) or 081 817 3000 to arrange one or for more information.

Get the most from your Classified Ad in AWOL - join the FREE online classifieds on our website at www.awolonline.net/classads Corner house of an attached row of three for sale The house and garden together cover 57.1 square Wa, and is ready to be moved in to. For more details on the house and the area in Samut Prakarn, visit www.bentrein. com/houseThe price is very negotiable. Newly Built 5 Bedroom House and Garage in Cha-Am. Built to the highest standards and using ‘A’ grade materials throughout 5 double bedrooms, ) 6 Toilets, Lounge/Dinning room, Kitchen to western style, Outside wash area, Ground floor toilet, Office, Hallway, Landing, Buddha room, Tank/Control room, Double Garage, Paved outside area/driveway, Pagoda and grassed garden area, Balcony and 2 terraces areas. All flooring in grade ‘A’ tiles. 2 meter high walled in garden. House priced to sell for 9.6 M/baht For more details please look at www.awolonline. net/classads.Contact details;- Email cdjeanne@hotmail. com and cdjeanne@gawab.com. Mobile numbers;(English) 089 681 6576 (Thai) 085 015 2280 property finance available- Just contact us to discuss the options available for Westerners email jeston@jbcthailand.com ECO FRIENDLY PEST control, non toxic, stain free, odourless domestic and commercial contracts available. Call for more details 0899109367 Steve

ROOMS TO RENT: Air conditioned, en-suite furnished, TV /DVD. bar/ restaurant on site. Pool and other facilities 10 mins from town centre. From 6000 Bt per mth Contact 0833111787 or pernodchris@hotmail.com brand new house 5kms from Hua Hin centre. Spanish style, fully new furnished - Summerland residence, 2 bedrooms with air, 2 baths, European kitchen, living room, cable TV, LCD TV. Private swimming pool, security. Available by weekend, week, month or long term. Contact franckphuket@hotmail.com FOR RENT Twin/Double room in house on Soi Naebkehardt (near Soi 51). 10 Min walk to town or 2 Min by motorbike. Shared living and kitchen facilities. Air con (or fan), UBC Satellite TV, Off street parking. Suit couple or 2 sharing. Bht 4500 per month or Bht 1200 per week (Inclusive Electricity , Water, UBC) Call Ray on 0827278568 or Email raymathiesen02@aol.com

Wanted TODDLER BED REQUIRED - We are looking for a toddler bed (3+ years) with mattress in good condition. email: leximanee@gmail.com

Rentals Rent house. 4br/2baths, large living room, large kitchen and Den. 2 balconies - both large, front and back. Comes furnished. 15,000 month. 4 km from town centre. Call 080 244 6739. SHOP 4 RENT - looking for a shop/restaurant to rent? 12,000THB/mth only, email leximanee@gmail.com house in town. 2br/2baths. large living room. small dining room. small kitchen. huge covered patio. air in 1 br. unfurnished. safe. no flooding. 7,000baht month for long term only. call 0802446739 3 bedroom, 4 bathroom villa with private pool. AC in all bedrooms. Quiet location in Khao Tao village close to Had Sai Noi beach and five minutes from four golf courses. Phone and internet. European kitchen. Spacious and airy living area. Well stocked, secluded garden. Available part furnished or unfurnished. Garden maintenance included. 28,000 per month. Contact dougal.brown@yahoo.com

FOR SALE

5 RAI LAND IN NONG KHA NEAR THE ROAD OPPOSITE HUAY MONKOL PRICE 2,000,000 BAHT 250 SQ. WAH LAND IN KHAO DANG PRICE 2,000,000 BAHT (8,000 BAHT/SQ. WAH) CALL 081 571 3003 (JA) 17

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AWOL’s Cryptic Crossword Down 1 A ray of light at right angles to a vessel’s length (5) 2 Ordinary seaman holding even exams (1-6) 3 Odds and ends to rib about, with one vehicle coming before another’s brought up (4-1-4) 5 Go east, to wash outside (5) 6 Purpose for which one is sent to girl? No - I turned up (7) 7 Queen to wear flowers for undergarment (8) 10 Petite gal’s novel - and where you see what it’s called (5-4) 13 Con child into taking metres away from first coat (8) 15 That which is joined together without interruption to nearly go on with hesitation (9) 17 Suspend animal with a sneaking, cowed look (7) 19 100 deuces designed to turn out well (7) 21 Doctor’s tool to speak slowly (5) 22 Enraged boy with Lawrence (5) Across 1 A short time at Lincoln brought back protozoon (6) 4 All over graduate’s animal (5) 8 Tried to dance around - setter’s fault (7) 9 Small container going into space? (7) 11 New vampire tie is urgently necessary (10) 12 Somebody admired on the screen? (4) 13 One assuming an attitude as a model, perhaps (5) 14 Fixed Student Union elections, not out to get permits (8) 16 Patching unusual drink (8) 18 Hooters sound silly at first, losing current (5) 20 Head of department to have blue (4) 21 Follow brother or sister back to equipment, we hear, to make food fit for an animal (3,7) 23 Leader - the headless one taking part in advertising (7) 24 Ceremony that’s not exactly real fun (7) 25 Nimble soldier held by drink (5) 26 Blur music’s not half bad, during empty bit of entertainment (6)

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All materials copyright. All rights reserved and no part of this publication may be reproduced in part or in full without the previous written consent of the publisher. Neither can any part be stored in a retrieval situation, nor transmitted by electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or any other means. AWOL is printed by Petchpoom Printing, and we can be contacted on info@awolonline.net or 081 649 8361. AWOL Co. Ltd., 136/229 Emerald Hill, Soi 6, Mooban Borfai, Hua Hin, Prachuap Kiri Khan, 77110, THAILAND.

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A Very Special House For Sale DREAM HOME IN SAM ROI YOD NATIONAL PARK

Stunning Thai style house on small award winning estate, just thirty minutes from Hua Hin, ten minutes from Pranburi and two minutes from Dolphin Bay. Specifications LAND AREA 2,500 sq. m LIVING AREA 250 sq. m

Guest House: Open plan divided by wardrobes 8 x 5 m plus en suite shower room/toilet. Separate entrance. Maid quarters: 6 x 4 m plus shower/toilet and outside kitchen. Separate entrance. Huge terrace and swimmng pool with sala and waterfall Beautiful private tropical gardens including 450 sq. m lake, island sala, waterfalls and more, with Lotus Pond at entrance.

Main house: Master Bedroom 4 x 6 m plus dressing room and bathroom with its own private garden, rain shower and 2 person bath; Second Bedroom 4 x 4 m Separate Shower room/toilet Open Plan L-shaped Living/Dining Room 74 sq m; Kitchen 5 x 5 m; Study 3 x 2 m; Utility Room 2 x 2 m Please visit www.awolonline.net/classads to see more pictures of this beautiful property.

Price includes all fixtures, fittings and furniture; highest standards throughout; air conditioning, satellite TV, marble and teak wood flooring, all fitted and free standing furniture hand made from teak wood including kitchen and bedrooms,electric entrance gates, completely fitted kitchen with full range of European appliances

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PRICE 18,500,000 Thai baht Contact 081 649 8361 (Eng), 081 614 8728 (Thai/Eng) or e-mail property@awolonline.net if you are genuinely interested in purchasing this property 19


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LUCKY SHOT BAR

Hua Hin’s only pool bar with THREE 9’ tables Ask about our drinks specials and other special offers Contact Andy on 086 178 1550 27/3 Poolsuk Road, Hua Hin

Hua Hin and Khao Takiap Ladies Pool League Results Week 10 15th March 2010 Dara Bar 8 - 2 Kum Koon Kom Hom A - A Railway Tavern Sunset B’d 4 - 6 Sports Bar Garden 2 4 - 6 Bob and Nok’s League Table Team Dara Bar Bob / Nok’s Sports Bar Railway T Sunset B’d Kum Koon Garden 2 Kom Hom

P W D 9 6 2 8 6 2 8 4 1 8 4 0 9 3 0 9 2 1 9 1 2 0 0 0

L 1 0 3 4 6 6 6 0

+/- Pts 26 14 20 14 0 9 -2 8 -12 6 -15 5 -17 4 0 0

Next Week’s Fixtures Week 11 22nd March 2010 Bob and Nok’s v Dara Bar Garden Bar 2 v Kom Hom Kum Koon v Sports Bar Railway Tavern v Sunset Boulevard

Cryptic Crossword Solution

Pool Leagues

Hua Hin Pool Billiard League League Table Team Eagle A Lucky Shot A Thaiwaii Oasis Queens Flower Bar Lucky Shot Student's Johnie Walker Black Braze Head Tattoo Eagle B Sunset Boulevard Sugar Cane Bar Johnie Walker Red Lucky Shot B Dick's Office A Dick's Office B Return Bar

P 10 10 10 10 10 9 10 9 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10

W 9 8 7 7 7 6 5 5 4 3 2 2 2 2 0 0

D 1 1 2 1 1 0 2 2 2 2 2 2 1 0 1 0

L Diff. Rks 0 50 92 1 30 53 1 24 40 2 28 49 2 24 43 3 18 48 3 14 27 2 12 35 4 -4 -12 5 -2 -2 6 -16 -27 6 -18 -29 7 -20 -34 8 -38 -76 9 -46 -100 10 -56 -107

Results Matchday 10 12th Mar 2010 Home Rks Pts Away QUE 11 2 LSA JWR 6 0 EA EB 16 5 JWB TW 15 5 SB SUG 18 6 RTB DA 3 0 OAS LSB 16 6 DB LSS BHT n/a

Rks Pts 17 6 20 8 10 3

12

3

12 20 5

2 8 2

n/a

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Perfect Opportunity Land For Sale!

5.3 Rai only 10 min walk from Black Mountain Golf Course. Sweeping mountain views, next to new road with electricity and water.

2 million baht/ rai or offers. Telephone 089 542 7431 (Eng) or 085 174 6855 (Thai) 20

Pts 19 17 16 15 15 12 12 12 10 8 6 6 5 4 1 0

This Week’s Fixtures Matchday 11 19th Mar 2010 Eagle A v Lucky Shot A JW Black v Queens Flower Sunset B’vard v JW Red Return Bar v Eagle B Oasis v Thaiwaii Dick’s Office B v Sugar Cane Braze Head Tat v Dick’s Office A Lucky Shot B v L Shot Stud Next Week’s Fixtures Matchday 12 26th Mar 2010 Lucky Shot A v JW Black Sunset B’vard v Eagle A Return Bar v Queens Flower JW Red v Oasis Eagle B v Dick’s Office B Thaiwaii v Braze Head Tattoo L Shot Stud v Sugar Cane Dick’s Office A v Lucky Shot B

JUNGLE JUICE DAILY SPECIALS

Mon Tue Thur Fri Sat Sun

Fish & chips 140 B Chicken/Chips 160 B Bangers & mash 140 B Pork chop, veg 180 B Hotpot w/ veg 160 B Roast Lamb (NZ) 220B Pork & Chicken 180 B

19/1 Selekam Road, Hua Hin Tel. 087 153 2259 Email mueansean@hotmail.com


Pool Leagues

Hua Hin & Khao Takiab 2009 Results Week 21 17th March 2010 Garden Bar 2 10 - 8 Thaiwaii Harley’s 14 - 4 Free Time Oasis 14 - 4 Dizzy Dolphin Railway Tavern 9 - 9 Dara Sports Bar 4 - 14 Bobby’s Sunset B’d 7 - 11 Bob and Noks League Table Team Oasis Garden 2 Thaiwaii Harley’s Sunset B’d Dizzy Dolp Dara Bob / Noks Free Time Bobby’s Railway T Sports Bar

P 21 21 21 21 21 21 21 20 21 21 20 21

W 17 14 13 13 11 10 7 8 6 5 1 2

D 2 2 3 2 1 3 6 3 5 3 4 2

L 2 5 5 6 9 8 8 9 10 13 15 17

+/104 42 78 46 20 18 0 2 -44 -62 -78 -126

Pts 36 30 29 28 23 23 20 19 17 13 6 6

Next Week’s Fixtures Week 22 24th March 2010 Bob and Noks v Thaiwaii Bobby’s v Sunset Boulevard Dara v Sports Bar Dizzy Dolphin v Railway Tavern Free Time v Oasis Garden Bar 2 v Harley’s See the back page for details of the new sponsorship deal for the Hua Hin and Khao Takiab Leagues.

Dick’s Office

Bar/restaurant open daily Best Sunday Roasts now with NZ Lamb every week, extensive menu, good music, pool & darts competitions, big screen projector for live sports, Nintendo Wii, quiz nights, parties and more! Located on Soi 80 (Sarawat) Tel: 089-046 9505, 085-930 7232 email: huahindick@hotmail.com

brought to you by Lucky Shot Bar Hua Hin Social Pool League Mr Dan’s Hua Hin 8-Ball League Results Results Week 14 17/3/10 Week 7 17th March 2010 Headrock v U Turn 12-7 Curly’s Bar B 4 - 8 Eagle Bar Lazy Daze B v Lord Nelson 7-12 DicksB 8 - 4 DicksA JW Black v King Bar Ladies 11-8 LilleMan 2 - 10 Komhom Billys v Jungle Juice B 9-10 MrDanA 8 - 4 Curly’s Bar A Jungle Juice A v Billys Babes n/a No game Pla’s Place King Bar Men v JW Red 10-9 League Table Sabai v Int/l Butterfly Bar 13-6 Team P W D L +/- Pts London Bar v Lazy Daze A n/a Eagle Bar 6 5 1 0 34 11 PP v Red Bar 14-5 MrDanA 5 5 0 0 26 10 League Table Team J Juice B Billys PP JW Red King Men J Juice A Sabai JW Black Headrock Limelight King Ldys U Turn London Billys Bbs Lazy Dz A Lzy Dz Gls Int/l B’fly Ld Nelson Red Bar

P 13 14 13 13 13 12 13 13 14 12 13 12 11 11 13 14 14 11 13

W 12 11 11 10 9 9 8 8 7 7 6 4 3 3 3 3 3 2 2

L 1 3 2 3 4 2 5 5 7 5 7 8 8 8 10 11 11 9 11

+/155-92 157-109 150-97 149-98 134-113 122-106 136-111 127-120 131-135 119-109 119-128 103-125 92-117 90-119 112-135 111-155 107-159 88-121 100-147

Pts 24 22 22 20 18 18 16 16 14 14 12 8 6 6 6 6 6 4 4

Next Week’s Fixtures Week 15 24/3/10 Red Bar v No Game Lazy Daze A v PP Int/l Butterfly Bar v London Bar JW Red v Sabai Billys Babes v King Bar Men Jungle Juice B v Jungle Juice A King Bar Ladies v Billys Lord Nelson v JW Black U Turn v Lazy Daze B Limelight v Headrock

Now online! All the local sports results as soon as they are available on our website, www.awolonline.net Just click on ‘Local Sports’ and then the sport of your choice

LilleMan Curly’s A Curly’s B Komhom DicksB Pla’s Place DicksA

7 7 6 5 6 6 6

4 3 3 2 1 1 0

0 1 1 0 1 1 1

3 -6 3 2 2 -2 3 -4 4 -12 4 -12 5 -26

8 7 7 4 3 3 1

Next Week’s Fixtures Week 8 24th March 2010 Curly’s Bar A v Pla’s Place DicksA v MrDanA Eagle Bar v DicksB Komhom v Curly’s Bar B No game LilleMan Mr Dan’s Hua Hin 9-Ball League Results Week 5 15th March 2010 Curly’s Bar B 10 - 14 Curly’s Bar A LilleMan 3 - 20 Eagle Bar Mr Dan A 14 - 10 Dicks A Plas Place v TNT Bar n/a No game Dicks B League Table Team P W D Eagle Bar 4 4 0 Mr Dan A 4 4 0 Dicks B 4 3 0 Curly’s A 5 2 0 LilleMan 4 1 1 Dicks A 5 1 1 Curly’s B 4 1 0 TNT Bar 4 1 0 Plas Place 4 1 0

L 0 0 1 3 2 3 3 3 3

+/- Pts 45 8 28 8 7 6 -4 4 -17 3 -18 3 0 2 -14 2 -27 2

Next Week’s Fixtures Week 6 22nd March 2010 Curly’s Bar A v Dicks B Dicks A v Curly’s Bar B Eagle Bar v Mr Dan A TNT Bar v LilleMan No game Plas Place

21

No

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Darts Leagues

Results Week 7 16th March Division 1 Scandic Bar A v Paradise n/a Lazy Daze v JW Red 13-5 CAT A v CAT B 9-9 JW Black v Oasis 11-7 Lucky Shot v ThaiWaii 13-5 Division 1 League Table Team JW Blk Lazy Dz Oasis Scan A P’dise CAT A CAT B Lucky S ThaiWai JW Red

P W D 6 5 1 6 5 1 6 4 0 5 4 0 5 3 1 6 2 1 6 1 2 6 1 0 6 1 0 6 0 0

L 0 0 2 1 1 3 3 5 5 6

+/- Pts 80-28 11 74-34 11 63-45 8 57-33 8 59-31 7 56-52 5 51-57 4 29-79 2 27-81 2 26-82 0

on the oche with Division 2 Jaew v Bobbys Bar 18-0 For all your darts supplies Kom Hom Ladies v Sabai Bar 10-8 087 155 7737 Dicks A v Dicks Office B 8-10 10% OFF FOR DARTS LEAGUE PLAYERS Jungle Juice v Scandic Bar B 18-0 Railway Tavern v Kom Hom n/a Individuals Top 10 Division 1 Division 2 League Table Name Team Pts Team J Juice KomH Ls Sabai Dicks B Dicks A Jaew R’way T Bobbys KomHom Scan B

P W D 6 6 0 6 5 0 6 4 1 6 4 1 6 3 0 6 2 0 5 2 0 6 1 0 5 1 0 6 0 0

L 0 1 1 1 3 4 3 5 4 6

+/- Pts 83-25 12 67-41 10 73-35 9 61-47 9 58-50 6 58-50 4 32-58 4 37-71 2 26-64 2 27-81 0

Next Week’s Fixtures Week 8 23/03/2010 Division 1 Division 2 ThaiWaii v Scandic Bar A Kom Hom v Jaew Oasis v Lucky Shot Scandic Bar B v Railway Tavern CAT B v JW Black Dicks Office B v Jungle Juice JW Red v CAT A Sabai Bar v Dicks Office A Paradise v Lazy Daze Bobbys Bar v Kom Hom Ladies

Hua Hin Golf Society

This week’s results: 16th March - Banyan 50 Entrants - Stableford Group ‘A’ 0-18 hcp 29 entrants: 1st Dickie Bird 36 pts 9 hcp. 2nd Simon Rouse 36 pts 7 hcp. 3rd Boom Schroeder 35 pts 14 hcp. 4th Per Eriksson 35 pts 7 hcp. 5th Pekka K (g) 35 pts 11 hcp. 6th Michael Sherlock 34 pts 15 hcp. Group ‘B’ 19-36 hcp 14 entrants: 1st Monika De-Brot Gasser 39 pts 30 hcp. 2nd Winfried Lauenstein 35 pts 31 hcp. 3rd Ann Buasri 35 pts 25 hcp. 4th Roger Smith 35 pts 19 hcp. 5th Berny Morgan 34 pts 22 hcp. 6th Ken Fraser 31 pts 19 hcp. Nearest Pin No. 2 Dickie Bird, No. 15 Garrett Olsen 12th March - Eagle Milford 48 Entrants - 4 Person team. Texas Scramble (12 teams) 1st T. Firth, P. Sandal, S. Aristodemou, D. Horton 64 gross 58.3 net, 2nd U. Riovas, K. Matti, H. Vaatainen, Risto (g) 63 gross 59.5 net, 3rd A. Quick, U. Sparvman, B. Porter, D. Blasdale 63 gross 59.8 net, 4th J. Moore, B. Moore, R. Fisher (g), D. Bird 64 gross 60.4 net Nearest Pin No. 4 Neil Payton (g), No. 17 Don Horton Next week’s fixtures: Tuesday 23rd Black Mountain - 1st Tee Time 9.36 Medal & Stableford Friday 26th Royal Ratchaburi - Stableford - Transport 07.45 22

1 Dicky JWB 2 Hans JWB 3 Ball Cat A 4 Mark O 5 Martin JWB 6 Joe O 7 Noi Cat B 8 Peter LD 9 Rune SBA 10 Don Cat B Top 6 Division 2 1 2 3 4 5 6

125 124 120 116 108 96 90 88 78 77

Name

Team

Pts

Stuart Lee Oil Jim Colin Steve

JJ KHL JJ DOB DOA DOA

114 108 95 83 69 65

Butterfly Rock Golf

This week’s results: 15th March Lake View - stableford 22 players 1st Div 1-17 - 11 players 1st - Mick Knight (12) - 39pts, 2nd - Doug Miller (9) - 36pts, 3rd - David Leaver (17) - 35pts 2nd Div 18-36 - 11 players 1st - Thew Khangtonghao (27) - 39pts, 2nd Barbara Anstee (24) - 35pts, 3rd - John Anstee (22) - 33pts 12th March Lake View AB - stableford 12 players 1st - David Leaver(17) - 38 points, 2nd - David Baker(11) - 38 points, 3rd-- Peter Tucker(8) - 38 points 12th March Palm Hills - stableford 14 players Front 9 - 23 pts - Nid Byrne, Back 9 - 17 pts - Jim Lynch. Debs Rawlings, Overall - 37 pts - Nid Byrne Forthcoming Fixtures Mon Mar 22nd Stableford & skins at Lake View AB from 10am Wed Mar 24th 2 Man Better Ball at Palm Hills from 10.00am Friday Mar 26th - Palm Hills


Football Preview Premier League (all times Thai) Saturday, 20 March 2010 Aston Villa v Wolves, 19:45 Two teams scrapping for points at opposite ends of the table should make for a great Midlands derby. Villa to snatch it by the odd goal. Everton v Bolton, 22:00 Bolton have eased away from the relegation scrap, but defeat here could put them right back in it. And we are predicting that. Portsmouth v Hull, 22:00 The struggle against adversity both on and off the pitch seems to have given Pompey new purpose and we can see them getting all the points against a poor Hull team. Stoke v Tottenham, 22:00 Stoke are no pushovers at home and Spurs might struggle to win this one. In fact, we think Stoke’s physical style will grab a win. Sunderland v Birmingham, 22:00 Sunderland could find themselves in trouble soon, despite their draw last weekend. Birmingham are safe and playing confidently and we think could get the win here. Wigan v Burnley, 22:00 The six pointers are coming thick and fast, with both in desperate need of the points. Burnley have been so poor away though its hardly worth them turning up - home win. Sunday, 21 March 2010 Arsenal v West Ham, 00:30 Another London derby hot on the heels of their drubbing at the hands of Chelsea, but the Hammers have a good record against the Gunners. However, Zola’s teams and tactics are under fire and confidence seems to be draining away. Home win. Man Utd v Liverpool, 20:30 Being trumpeted as always as one of the games of the season, but we don’t think it lives up to the billing. We don’t Liverpool can test United, so this will be a home win. Fulham v Man City, 22:00 The scoreline last week was a little unfair on Fulham, and we expect them to do better against City. A good game for the fans and we expect a few goals too and a draw.

kicked off by

Premier League Table Team

P

GD Pts

1 Man Utd 30 46 66 2 Chelsea 29 42 64 3 Arsenal 30 38 64 4 Tottenham 29 25 52 5 Liverpool 30 19 51 6 Man City 28 17 50 7 Aston Villa 28 17 49 8 Birmingham 29 -1 44 9 Everton 29 4 42 10 Fulham 29 0 38 11 Stoke 29 -5 36 12 Blackburn 29 -17 34 13 Bolton 30 -18 32 14 Sunderland 29 -8 31 15 Wigan 30 -31 28 16 West Ham 29 -12 27 17 Wolverhampton 29 -24 27 18 Burnley 30 -32 24 19 Hull 29 -34 24 20 Portsmouth 29 -26 19 Blackburn v Chelsea, 23:00 Rovers are in touching distance of safety but games like this could easily have them back in the mire. Chelsea were not at all flattered by the score last week and will be in confident mood. Away win. Wednesday, 24 March 2010 West Ham v Wolves, 03:00 One of the games both teamssimply must win to have any chance of survival. The Hammers to triumph. Thursday, 25 March 2010 Aston Villa v Sunderland, 02:45 One of Villa’s games in hand which they must win to have a chance of

155 Bobby’s Bar 087 7737 or

And Restaurant

089 985 7473

Darts,Pool, All Day Breakfasts

136/334 Soi 102, Hua Hin (opp. Coconut Grove) AWOL Challenge Fantasy League Top 10 # 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Team GW TOT Sassy Thai 74 1706 simply red 60 1700 I am...Sasha Fierce 68 1676 Mr ChaAming 67 1659 Sorco United 79 1585 Gusto Creative 60 1580 Huahindick 54 1577 Thailand Lover 66 1557 Wanderlust United 38 1545 Jobless Army 47 1515

European football. Home win. Man City v Everton, 02:45 Two more of the Euro contenders and this will be close. Everton to grab a surprise away win. Portsmouth v Chelsea, 02:45 Stranger things have happened but the odds of Chelsea losing or even drawing here are remote, and who are we to argue? Away win. Blackburn v Birm’ham, 03:00 Probably the toughest game of the week to predict as the two team’s preceding games could have a big mental effect. Thats why we are predicting a draw.

BOAPA’S PLACE The only farang establishment in Borfai Look for the red lights! European and Thai food Kjøttkaker og Lapskaus Open from 11am Closed Sundays 085 425 1185 (Pa)

Garden bar and restaurant

23

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CAPELLO SETS WORLD CUP ARREST TARGET

london, england ENGLAND must finish in the top four sides arrested for lewd and uncontrollable drunkenness during the 2010 World Cup, Fabio Capello said yesterday. The England manager warned that vodka-soaked Eastern Europeans now pose a serious threat while the Germans and the Danes are used to drinking out of huge beer glasses all night and vomiting on each other’s feet. Capello also repeated Pele’s famous prediction that during his lifetime, an African team would get absolutely trousered and set fire to a nightclub. He added: “The high altitude and cheap alcohol give us the best chance in a generation of being deported by the end of the second week. And the increased physical fitness of players these days means they can push each other round in shopping trolleys for hours on end until they get arrested.” Capello said: “We have some very experienced obnoxious drunken morons but it’s often the younger players who drink without fear and provoke the sort of breathtaking 300man brawl that can have everyone back on the plane and heading for Gatwick by Capello hopes one sunrise.” In addition, the Italian hopes to bring England’s flair for freaky sex offences of his players will to the world’s greatest sports contest. He said: “One player showed me some clips on defile an endangered his iPhone. I haven’t been able to look at a jam doughnut since.” rhinoceros

New Sponsors of Hua Hin & Khao Takiab Pool Leagues The Bangkok Ball in Hand Pool Bar, distributor of ‘Brunswick’, the world’s leading billiards and pool table

manufacturer, has announced that it will sponsor the Hua Hin and Khao Takiab Pool Leagues from next season. Furthermore, the league and its sponsors will support the Mercy House Orphanage in Pranburi, by providing the children with tangible needs such as school uniforms and school books. The League is now nearing the end of its fourth season and has a Wednesday evening League comprising 12 teams and a Monday ladies league comprising 8 teams. There is also a men’s and ladies singles competition, which runs throughout the season and culminates in a finals evening at the end of the season. An end of season presentation party will be held on Wednesday 31st March 2010 at Oasis Bar in Khao Takiab from 7.30pm. Brunswick will provide the trophies and cover the printing costs from next season and the league entry fees will all be donated to the Pranburi Orphans fund. Collection boxes will also be placed in all the competing teams bars for additional voluntary contributions. Mike Smith., the league organizer said, “This is fantastic and has given a real purpose for having a pool league. Hopefully, this will buy the orphans their annual schoolbooks and uniforms with change to do something else”. Keith Eck, of The Bangkok Ball in Hand Thailand, added, “We are delighted to support the league and we hope that this will be a real benefit to both the pool playing community and the orphans at Mercy House”. The current league season (see p 21) ends on 24th March and the ladies league (p 20) on 12th April. The new league will start immediately following. Any team interested in joining the league can contact Mike on 084 376 9834 or anybody interested in Brunswick Pool Tables and accessories can contact Keith on 086 978 8321.

“The local establishment with local prices”

Excellent Thai & Western food Cajun/Louisiana style & Nightly Specials Our regulars recommend the BBQ Spare Ribs & the King Pork Chops

Thai & International Satellite channels Pool Table, Darts & Karaoke (every other Friday)

To find us, travel north on the canal road past the traffic lights and turn left at the bridge after the petrol station and right immediately over it. We are on the right. Tel. 032-522 418, 083-317-3008 12/10 Soi Samoprong, Hua Hin

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AWOL Issue 74