December 26, 2019
Volume 49 - No. 52
By Friedrich Gomez
It’s the middle of December, 2019, and I’m volunteering some of my time at a local senior retirement dwelling here in Escondido. In the recreation lounge, a large gathering of seniors are in a spirited debate on some of the old-time comedians, ‘back in the day.’ And how they measure up to the British comedians across the pond. In their aged eyes, they are no The Paper - 760.747.7119
longer in their 80s and 90s as they talk of their greener years, during the height of vaudeville and the early days of radio – when you had to use your imagination, instead of having television do that for you. But even America’s great comic, Fred Allen, found radio to be an intrusive piece of furniture found in every American’s living room. Allen rebuked radio as if a demon: “I don’t take to furniture that talks.”
This particular day, verbal swords are drawn as senior citizens debate the barometer of greatness of American comedians versus the British giants, such as Charlie Chaplin.
In the mist of this heated debate, celebrated names are thrown about like confetti: Jack Benny, Milton Berle, Benny Hill, Peter Sellers, Cary Grant, and so on.
As a volunteer on this particu-
lar day, they turn their attention in my direction and ask of me: “Friedrich, you write for The Paper, do you think the best British comedians are as funny as American comedians, like Bob Hope?” Suddenly, the entire recreation room became cathedral silent. My reply fell upon the gathering like a World War II bombshell.
American Humor vs British Humour See Page 2
The Paper • Page 2 • December 26, 2019
American Humor vs. British Humour Cont. from Page 1
Loud gasps were heard sprinkled about the room, and the shocked faces seemed frozen. And I could tell, they never knew the truth of what I had just uttered. “Bob Hope was English by birth – not American.” I paused, then slowly proceeded as if navigating through a minefield of opposing opinions regarding the debate of American vs British humor: “English-American stand-up comedian, Bob Hope, was born in London, England in 1903. His parents emigrated to America in 1908. He became an American citizen in 1920 at age 17. In the case of Bob Hope, he was born abroad and then assimilated into an American.
For me, the lesson to be learned here was not really so much about if Bob Hope was really an American or British, but rather, how much should we ‘know’ about any subject before we form an opinion on it?
Both nations (Great Britain and the United States) are increasingly asking this same question in a friendly, but competitive way. So much so, that a series of actual television
Give Us This Day Our Daily Chuckle This week, a compendium of wit, wisdom and neat stuff you can tell at parties. Enjoy! Spread the Stupidity
Only in America ......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front. Only in America ......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke. Only in America .......do banks leave vault doors open and then chain the pens to the counters. Only in America ......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage. Only in America ............do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight..
Specials broadcast from England have already descended upon this fun query, resulting in a series of comedy competitions between American and British comedians, going head-to-head. All in jolly good fun, of course.
Comedy competition was a steady diet for us Americans in the form of NBC’s “Last Comic Standing,” which ran nine full seasons. It seemed a natural evolution that our British kinfolk on the other side of the pond would wish to test our funny-bone mettle, as well. Against their own vanguard of comedy giants, on their own soil.
Are British comedians as funny as, say, George Burns, Red Skelton, Rodney Dangerfield, Richard Pryor, Jonathan Winters, Phyllis Diller, or Flip Wilson? Or, what about the more recent crop of American funnymen such as Jerry Seinfeld, Jim Carrey, Chris Rock, Will Ferrell, Steven Wright, Eddie Murphy, or Dave Chappelle? And it seems difficult to find anyone more entertaining and funny than current American comedy giant, Cedric the Entertainer, the consummate storyteller. Or the mighty Jeff Dunham (quite possibly the greatest
comedy-ventriloquist act of all time)? It was Jeff Dunham who made a funny differential between the British and Americans: “I chased skirts all over the world – till I got to Scotland! Boy, was I surprised!”
And yet, we Americans often only see our own side of the world, with reckless disregard as to what may actually exist elsewhere. Beyond our sight and ears. After all, it was the great Roman politician, Cicero (106 BC – 43 BC) who warned us all: “He who only knows his side of the mountain, knows little of that.”
The British have given us some remarkable comedic gems, past to present: Tommy Cooper, Peter Sellers, Benny Hill, and John Cleese of Monte Python fame. And let’s not forget English-born Leslie Townes Hope (1903-2003), born in the suburban district of southeastern London, better known as Bob Hope. Or 58-year-old Ricky Gervais, my personal British favorite.
The comparative assessment of comedy, in this article, will embrace all its varied expressions, to include not only standup, but also films, TV sitcoms, slapstick, impressionists, satirists, political commentators, etc. This is comedy-humor in its broadest, pos-
Only in America .......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.
don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
EVER WONDER ...
Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word? Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons? Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food? Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes? Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
I like this one! If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress? If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle)....in other words, send it to everyone. We all need to smile every once in a while. ••••• A woman, cranky because her husband was late coming home again, decided to leave a note, saying, "I've had enough and have left you...don't bother coming after me" Then she hid under the bed to see his reaction.
After a short while the husband comes home and she could hear him in the kitchen before he comes into the bedroom. She could see him walk towards the dresser and pick up the note. After a few minutes he wrote something on it before picking up the phone and calling someone...
That the British have a formidable, razor-sharp wit is universally agreed upon. And they have the weight of history behind them to prove it. As far back as Shakespeare’s Comedies, and even long before that, the British were undisputed masters of comedy, and satire, and irony -- their quintessential armament and the fodder for their cannons. No other culture – to this time – has surpassed the profound depth, skill, and wisdom of Shakespeare’s Comedies. Not even the Father of Comedy, the great Aristophanes (c. 446386), can eclipse the English Bard from Stratford-uponAvon in his domain of humor.
However, many American humorists and comics are not impressed. Famous American comedy magician, Penn Jillette, of “Penn and Teller” fame deflated the great British tradition: “British humor is like pompous farting.” But, in the face of history, and up to the present, the British have over-shot the necessity of having to prove their comedic mettle. To anyone. The ferocious tale of the tape can render anyone who is willing to
American Humor vs. British Humour Cont. on Page 3
"She's finally gone...yeah I know, about bloody time, I'm coming to see you, put on that sexy French nightie. I love you...can't wait to see you...we'll do all the naughty things you like." He hung up, grabbed his keys and left.
She heard the car drive off as she came out from under the bed. Seething with rage and with tears in her eyes she grabbed the note to see what he wrote ... "I can see your feet. We're outta bread. Be back in five minutes." ••••• Deer Tale... Having been around Deer and Deer hunting all my life, I can just see this going on in vivid color ... hilarious! Educated Farmer:
I had this idea that I could rope a deer, put it in a stall, feed it up on corn for a couple of weeks, then kill it and eat it. The first step in this adventure was getting a deer. I figured that, since they congregate at my cattle feeder and do not seem to have much fear of me when we are there (a bold one will sometimes come right up and sniff at the bags of feed while I am in the back of the truck not 4 feet away), it should not
Chuckles Cont. on Page 5
The Paper • Page 3 • December 26, 2019
in the Parish Hall. The first hour features a speaker relating to Parkinson’s and the second half consists of breakout groups of people with Parkinson’s in one area and care partners in another area. Our featured speaker for Monday, January 6th is Sherrie Gould, MSN, NP-C from Scripps Clinic Center for Neurorestoration who will present “Duopa, A New Treatment Option for Parkinson’s” (sponsored by Abbvie Inc.). Come learn, share, meet, and enjoy the free refreshments with other involved Parkinson’s persons. If you have any questions, please call (858) 354-2498 or (760) 749-8234.
Evelyn Madison The Social Butterfly Email Evelyn at:
North County Aviculturists to Meet on January 4th - The North County Aviculturists, a club for pet bird owners and breeders, will have the pleasure of a presentation by Jill Thorburn on January 4th . She knows all there is to know about Princess of Wales Parakeets from Australia. Join us as she explains the best practices to keep these beautiful, gentle birds happy and thriving. And we will provide a wonderful meal for attendees. NCA is a '501(c)7 - Social and Recreation Clubs' organization. The meeting will be held at the Vista Masonic Center, 761 Eucalyptus Ave, Vista CA 92084, on Saturday, January 4th, starting at 5:30pm. For more information, visit www.ncabirdclub.com. North Inland Parkinson's Support Group - On Monday, January 6th, the Parkinson's Support Group for all North County Inland Communities will hold their first meeting of the new year. This group sponsors free monthly meetings for persons with Parkinson's and their care partners. Monthly meetings are held on the first Monday of every month, from 10am to 12noon, at the San Rafael Church, 17252 Bernardo Center Drive, Rancho Bernardo,
American Humor vs. British Humour Cont. from Page 2
listen to hard facts to be thunderstruck. But, who can match the American brilliance of our early beginnings, during the silent film era, for example? It is near-impossible to match the towering genius of American silent film stars, Harold Lloyd (1893-1971), or Kansas-born, Buster Keaton (1895-1966), nicknamed “The Great Stone Face.”
Yes, indeed, it is exceedingly difficult to match these early American titans during the silent film era. But, for the British, it is an easy task. The long shadow of London-born, Charlie Chaplin (1887-1977), by all accounts, is simply without equal. There is no necessity to enumerate any other British giant; Chaplin’s legacy and immortality – alone – devours any pretender-to-thethrone in one easy swallow. By overwhelming worldwide consensus, every notable observer – outside of a straitjacket – must concede Chaplin’s sovereignty. International film institutes have hailed his work as, “The greatest piece of acting and the highest moment in movies.” At the 1972 Oscars in Los Angeles, the audience at these
American Business Women's Association Meeting is Thursday, January 2nd - Happy New Year! What's your vision for 2020? Join us on Thursday, January 2nd for a Vision Board Workshop, with guest facilitator, Kinjal Pike. Do you feel like you are stretched thin? Are you burned out and exhausted and yet not sure if what you are doing is helping you and your family? It's time to turn it all around and manifest your dreams. This workshop will help you answer these questions and others you may have. We will provide basic board construction materials. Attendees: start collecting printouts, magazines, photos that might have a place on your board. You are looking for images that speak to your goals and dreams. Watch your emails for suggestions. Guests are welcome and there will be plenty of networking opportunities before, during and after the meeting.
The meeting of the Soaring Eagles Chapter of the ABWA will be Thursday, January 2nd, with networking 6pm-6:30pm; dinner/program 6:30pm-8:115pm, at The Old Spaghetti Factory, 111 N. Twin Oaks Valley Road, San Marcos 92069. Cost is $25/members; $30/guests. RSVP today at email@example.com or call Sue Punian at 760.822.2242. For more information or to register, visit the website at www.abwa-soaringeagles.org.
Escondido Woman's Club Meeting Announced - On Monday, January 6, the
Academy Award ceremonies gave him an astonishing twelve-minute standing ovation, the longest-sustained standing ovation in Hollywood’s storied history at the Oscars. He wept at the words inscribed on his award, which simply read: “The incalculable effect he has had in making motion pictures the art form of the century.”
In 1998, illustrious and worldrespected film critic, Andrew Sarris, called Chaplin, “Arguably the single most important artist produced by the cinema; certainly its most extraordinary performer and probably its most universal icon.” TIME Magazine simply listed Chaplin as, “One of the most important People in the 20th Century.”
Six of Charlie Chaplin’s films have been selected for preservation – for all time, for all generations to experience – in the National Film Registry by the United States Library of Congress, in Washington, D.C.
In 1975, two years before his death at the age of 88, the Great One -- known as Charles Spencer Chaplin -- was awarded a knighthood by Queen Elizabeth II. He was too old
first meeting of the New Year for the Escondido Woman's Club will start at 10:30am with the business meeting, and at 11:30am they will welcome the speaker, Spencer Birch who will speak on "Outsmarting the Scammers". Question/answer session follows. Lunch starts at 12noon. The meetings are held at the Woman's Club clubhouse at 751 No. Rose (corner Mission Ave). At the business meeting the Nominating Committee will be elected. Members are reminded to bring their donations for Life Care, the Humane Society and other organizations. RSVP to Joy at 760.855.3850 by Friday, January 3rd. Cost is $15/person.
January Social Events for North County Widows/Widowers Club - Time to kickoff the New Year for social opportunities with the North County Widows and Widowers Club and enjoy lively conversation, beverages, events, and good food. Sunday, January 5th, Sunday Champagne Brunch Buffet, 11am – 2pm, “The Grille at Lake San Marcos”, 1750 San Pablo Drive, San Marcos 92078; Price $20.00 plus tip, one free glass Champagne – or $8.00 unlimited. RSVP to Dale at 760522-5144. Wednesday, January 8th Book Club/Luncheon; Contact Dottie, 760-4385491. Friday, January 10th Twilight Dinner Dance, Vista Elks (membership not required), 1947 E. Vista Way, Vista, CA 92084; Bar/Dinner 5pm – Music/Dancing 6:30pm; $15.00 at door plus $2.00 table charge; RSVP Dottie at 760-438-5491. Thursday, January 16th 3pm Happy Hour, PF Chang’s, 5621 Paseo Del Norte (patio seating), Carlsbad 92008; RSVP to Johny at 760-207-3387. Sunday, January 19th 5pm-8:30pm, Lovely Dinner Dance; Shadowridge Country Club, 1980 Gateway Dr. (free parking); $42.00–all inclusive, Mushroom Salisbury Steak or Dijon Chicken and all the fixin’s; Music by Billy’s Band with featured singer Janet Hammer. Yes, door prizes too; RSVP to Karin, 408-438-7310 (cell). Tuesday, January 21st 3pm Happy Hour, Buffalo Wild Wings, 1010 San Marcos Blvd (Restr. Row), San Marcos, 92078; RSVP to Johny 760-207-3387. Tuesday, January
and too weak to kneel, as is customary, and had to receive the honor in his wheelchair. In the realm of television comedy sitcoms, America more than holds its own. Pioneers of comedy television, such as Sid Caesar, George Burns, Jack Benny, Red Skelton, Jackie Gleason, Dick Van Dyke, Lucille Ball, Carol Burnett, and others, are perhaps out of reach to be matched, for the most part. Such American sitcoms, by any measure, seem unchallenged. Perhaps the American comedy ensemble in “All in the Family,” which ran on CBS for nine seasons, from 1971 to 1979, was the most ground-breaking for U.S. audiences. All in the Family poked fun at normally forbidden hot topics such as racism, homosexuality, religion, menopause, the Vietnam War, and impotence. It not only pushed the envelope, it mailed it to another galaxy. The show is now regarded as one of the greatest television comedy series of all time, anywhere. Yet, it must be acknowledged that America’s “All in the Family” blockbuster television show was an idea totally based and borrowed from an English comedy show on the BBC network, called “Till Death Us Do Part.” American producer, Norman Lear, read an article in Variety magazine about the
28th 3pm Happy Hour, Green Dragon Tavern, 6115 Paseo Del Norte, Carlsbad 92011. Special Event – Wednesday, February 10th Tour Olympic Training Center/Chula Vista, Culture Caravan/Vista Senior Center, book with credit card directly with Culture Caravan 760-6432828 (10am-2pm); Transportation, Tour, Lunch $81.00; Information Contact, Shirley at 760-741-8004.
Single Travelers Club Meeting - On Tuesday, January 14th, the Single Travelers Club will meet from 5 - 7pm, at the Hunter Steakhouse, 1221 Vista Way, Oceanside. The discussion will be "My week in Malta, a revelation." There will be Happy Hour specials. Visitors welcome. To RSVP, please call Jackie at 760.438.1472.
NARFE Meeting Announced for January 16th - At the first NARFE meeting of the new year, the 2020 Tax Changes is the title of the program to be presented by Dale Huffman, a certified public accountant. Dale will discuss what to expect for this tax year and answer general tax questions. The National Active & Retired Federal Employees Association (NARFE) will conduct a chapter business meeting from 1:30-2:00pm, on Thursday, January 16th, at the Oceanside Senior Center, 455 Country Club Lane, and the program will be from 2:00-3:00pm. The meeting is free and open to the public. Light refreshments provided. Visit narfe.org/chapter706. 2nd Annual Farm Stand West Christmas Tree Event - Last year and again this year, countless families have begun their season of celebrating with a visit to The Farm Stand West Christmas Tree event. It's a rare opportunity for busy families to immerse themselves in a day or evening filled with fun, fresh air and the simplest holiday joys. Choosing a fresh cut tree from many sizes and varieties
Social Butterfly Cont. on Page 6
great success of Till Death Us Do Part in the United Kingdom – and decided to copy it. And he did. Lear bought the rights to the English show format, idea, plot and all, and made all the characters – you guessed it – American! England’s television character, Alf Garnett (played brilliantly by Warren Mitchell), on Till Death Us Do Part, was a working-class Conservative with openly racist views and who loved football and politics – even though he had limited and distorted knowledge on all of these subjects. Archie Bunker would be patterned exactly after this British character, Alf Garnett. Right down to his favorite sofa chair.
Though racist and offensive, Garnett, was humanized in other clever ways to make him vulnerable in his ignorance and, therefore, with an element of sympathy mixed with charm – and a whole lot of laughter – to make him widely acceptable to British viewers. Exactly as Archie Bunker would later be replicated in America. English character, Garnett, would often battle with his long-haired, live-in, unem-
American Humor vs. British Humour Cont. on Page 5
The Paper • Page 4 • December 26, 2019 Fatal Traffic Accident - Carlsbad
On December 16, 2019 at 12:01 a.m., Officers from the Carlsbad Police Department responded to the intersection of Poinsettia and Avenida Encinas for a report of a vehicle fire. Upon arrival, Officers found a motorcycle fully engulfed in fire at the 6800 block of Avenida Encinas. The rider of the motorcycle was found lying in the roadway a few feet from the motorcycle. A preliminary investigation has revealed that a male rider was traveling northbound on Avenida Encinas on a motorcycle. For unknown reasons, the motorcycle collided into a parked vehicle at the 6800 block of Avenida Encinas. The motorcycle rider was ejected from the motorcycle. The motorcycle rider was pronounced deceased on scene.
The San Diego County Medical Examiner’s Office is assisting in this investigation. The identity of the deceased adult male driver will be released by the Medical Examiner’s Office after the next of kin has been advised. It is unknown if alcohol intoxication is a factor into the cause of the collision and the investigation by the Traffic Division is underway.
Investigators are requesting anyone that witnessed the collision to call Carlsbad Police Department Accident Investigator, Corporal
Man About Town A Christmas Story
The brand new pastor and his wife, newly assigned to their first ministry, to reopen a church in urban Brooklyn, arrived in early October excited about their opportunities. When they saw their church, it was very run down and needed much work. They set a goal to have everything done in time to have their first service on Christmas Eve.
They worked hard, repairing pews, plastering walls, painting, etc.and on Dec. 18 were ahead of schedule and just about finished. On Dec 19 a terrible tempest - a driving rainstorm hit the area and lasted for two days. On the 21st, the pastor went over to the church. His heart sunk when he saw that the roof had leaked,
Travis Anderson at 760-931-2208. For more information
Sergeant Chris Karches, 760-9312107 or firstname.lastname@example.org Sierra Club Endorses Petition Efforts Oceanside Development Rejected Three Times by Planning Commission.
The Sierra Club has announced its endorsement of petition efforts to stop the housing tract development, North River Farms, from being built. The Oceanside City Council approved the 585 home development to be built in the last remaining agricultural holds. Volunteers need to gather approximately 12,000 signatures to place a referendum on the November 2020 ballot for Oceanside voters The Oceanside Planning Department and the Oceanside Planning Commission rejected it three times.” A Sierra Club spokesman said, “This project is a perfect example of the type of housing development that creates the highest wildfire danger to the people living there and to their homes. It is located in an extremely high wildfire risk area without enough safe evacuation road capacity.” causing a large area of plaster about 6 feet by 8 feet to fall off the front wall of the sanctuary just behind the pulpit, beginning about head high.
The pastor cleaned up the mess on the floor, and not knowing what else to do but postpone the Christmas Eve service, headed home. On the way he noticed that a local business was having a flea market type sale for charity so he stopped in. One of the items was a beautiful, handmade, ivory colored, crocheted table cloth with exquisite work, fine colors and a cross embroidered right in the center. It was just the right size to cover up the hole in the front wall. He bought it and headed back to the church.
By this time it had started to snow. An older woman running from the opposite direction was trying to catch the bus. She missed it. The pastor invited her to wait in the warm church for the next bus 45 minutes later. She sat in a pew and paid no attention to the pastor while he got a ladder, hangers, etc., to put up the tablecloth as a wall tapestry. The pastor could hardly believe how beautiful it looked and it covered up the entire problem area. Then he noticed the woman walking down the center aisle. Her face was like a sheet. "Pastor," she asked, "where did you get that tablecloth?" The pastor explained. The woman asked him to check the lower right corner to
Term Limits for Oceanside Elected Officials? Voters May Decide
Oceanside officially placed a measure on next November’s ballot that, if approved, would limit the mayor and council members to a maximum of three four-year terms.
In addition, the city adopted a new appointments policy. The appointments policy outlines how vacancies in elected positions will be advertised, the requirements for applications, and how the council will interview applicants. The policy requires each applicant to attend a special council meeting and make a one-minute presentation, then answer three standard questions, and then take one additional question from each council member. Oceanside council members asked for the policy in September, in part because of concerns raised by residents. Some people have said the city should fill more vacancies by holding special elections and rely less on appointments.
Oceanside is one of many Southern California cities that have recently switched or are in the process of switching from at-large council elections to district council elections. In most places, the mayor continues to be an at-large position, except in smaller cities that appoint a different council member annually to serve as mayor. see if the initials, EBG were crocheted into it there. They were. These were the initials of the woman, and she had made this tablecloth 35 years before, in Austria. The woman could hardly believe it as the pastor told how he had just gotten the tablecloth. The woman explained that before the war she and her husband were well-to-do people in Austria. When the Nazis came, she was forced to leave. Her husband was going to follow her the next week. She was captured, sent to prison and never saw her husband or her home again. The pastor wanted to give her the tablecloth; but she made the pastor keep it for the church. The pastor insisted on driving her home, that was the least he could do. She lived on the other side of Staten Island and was only in Brooklyn for the day for a housecleaning job. What a wonderful service they had on Christmas Eve. The church was almost full. The music and the spirit were great. At the end of the service,the pastor and his wife greeted everyone at the door and many said that they would return.
One older man, whom the pastor recognized from the neighborhood, continued to sit in one of the pews and stare, and the pastor wondered why he wasn't leaving. The man asked him where he got the tablecloth on the front
Letters to the Editor Another Friedrich Fan
Dear Mr. Lyle E. Davis:
Is there a way that the public can meet your feature writer Mr. Freidrick Gomez? I find all of his feature stories to be so enjoyable and impossible to put down. In fact many of us save them! Can you give me his email address?
To be honest, my circle of friends only pick up copies of The Paper if we see he has written the feature story. We plan to attend the Rat Pack show at the Pala Casino on Jan.
Letters to the Editor Cont. on Page 5
wall because it was identical to one that his wife had made years ago when they lived in Austria before the war and how could there be two tablecloths so much alike? He told the pastor how the Nazis came, how he forced his wife to free for her safety, and he was supposed to follow her, but he was arrested and put in a concentration camp. He never saw his wife or his home again or all the 35 years in between. The pastor asked him if he would allow him to take him for a little ride. They drove to Staten Island and to the same house where the pastor had taken the woman three days earlier. He helped the man climb the three flights of stairs to the woman's apartment, knocked on the door and he saw the greatest Christmas reunion he could ever imagine. Evelyn Madison and I hope each and every one of our readers and their family members and friends all had a wonderful Christmas and/or Chanukah Holiday . . . and extend our wishes for a most Happy, Prosperous, and Healthy New Year!
The Paper • Page 5 • December 26, 2019
American Humor vs. British Humour Cont. from Page 3
ployed, left-wing son-in-law in clashes over politics, race, sex, and everything else – just as Archie Bunker would later encounter with his own son-inlaw, Michael Stivik aka ‘Meat Head’ (played by Rob Reiner) on American TV sets.
In many ways, England’s original version was infinitely more powerful and ground-breaking than its later American counterpart. Till Death Us Do Part appeared years earlier and, thus, challenged political correctness in a far more conservative time. Britain’s principle character, Alf Garnett, spouted out racial minority epithets such as “coons,” in far more treacherous waters during the 1960s than its latter clone: All in the Family. England’s version was during earlier, more conservative times when such language usage was considered totally unacceptable, disturbing, and challenging. Consequently, Till Death Us Do Part was attacked by religious leaders, politicians, and the media. The ensuing controversy against the English version, ironically, only made it more a ‘curiosity-piece’ to watch and, therefore, drove the ratings sky-high, eventually making it a titanic success, despite its detractors.
Letters to the Editor Cont. from Page 4
While many thought America’s daring All in the Family format blazed the first pioneering trail with its spoofing on bigotry, religion, homosexuality, anti-immigration, menopause, and racial slurs – it was not.
That honor, rightfully, belongs to the British. Conversely, the British have taken many of our American television shows and remade them to their own liking. However, strictly in the realm of comedy (which is the thrust of this article), America has borrowed vastly more from the British, than the other way around. Britain’s “Man About the House” was remade in America as the vastly popular “Three’s Company,” on ABC (19771984) and which starred John Ritter, Suzanne Somers, and Joyce DeWitt. Also, the British comedy sitcom, “Steptoe and Son,” was copied and recreated in America as “Sanford and Son,” which became a blockbuster hit for ABC (1972-1977), which starred comedians Redd Foxx and Demond Wilson. All still in television re-runs. Nevertheless, American comedy sitcoms – overall – are rarely matched in most other aspects of the game. The scope and depth of American comedy
My youngest daughter and all her friends already saw the Beach Boys concert last Wed. on Dec. 18 there at Pala Casino and they are still talking about it! My daughter and her friends say that Pala is the most gorgeous place and they now plan to return for more fun there.
Is FreidrickGomez married? My daughter and her friends think he's the cat's meow (that's an old term when I was growing up but it means he's "wonderful.") Mr. Davis I wish you and your family a very Merry Christmas. You are what makes America great. God bless you forever and a day. /s/ From Mrs. Arlene A. Tibbets & family members from Escondido, San Marcos and Vista.
To many film and entertainment critics, the British are often given the nod over their American counterparts in the category of television comedy sitcoms. Nevertheless, this remains a hotbed of discussion, controversy, and disagreement. Which is a healthy exercise in free-thinking.
First off, it is necessary for cobwebs to be brushed aside. For example, much of what has transpired in humor, has a questionable past. For example, witticism attributed to English Prime Minister, Winston Churchill, such as his so-called celebrated encounters with Nancy Astor, never really occurred, according to leading scholars who have painfully researched a variety of
Chuckles Cont. from Page 2
be difficult to rope one, get up to it and toss a bag over its head (to calm it down) then hog tie it and transport it home.
10th. I loved the way Mr. Gomez wrote the story. His story made us so excited and raring to go!
We also plan to visit Pala Casino for the Music of the 1940's and 1950's with The Mar Dels on Jan. 21. On my birthday we plan to stay overnight at the beautiful Pala Hotel and see "Frank Sinatra's Big Band" on Feb. 14 which happens to also be Valentine's Day!
sitcoms take one’s breath away: “I Love Lucy,” “The Dick Van Dyke Show,” “M*A*S*H,” “Cheers,” “Seinfeld,” and “The Big Bang Theory” are mountains of success. Yet, the British have their own Himalayan range: “Faulty Towers,” “Are You Being Served?” “Keeping Up Appearances,” and “Absolutely Fabulous,” known simply as Ab Fab by its rabid British fan base which – in this article -give a shout-out to Americans: “If you haven’t heard of Absolutely Fabulous, then you are seriously behind the times!”
Letters to the Editor? We love ‘em! Our Readers do as well! Send them to: thepaper@cox net
I filled the cattle feeder then hid down at the end with my rope. The cattle, having seen the roping thing before, stayed well back. They were not having any of it. After about 20 minutes, my deer showed up-- 3 of them. I picked out a likely looking one, stepped out from the end of the feeder, and threw my rope. The deer just stood there and stared at me. I wrapped the rope around my waist and twisted the end so I would have a good hold. The deer still just stood and stared at me, but you could tell it was mildly concerned about the whole rope situation. I took a step towards it, it took a step away. I put a little tension on the rope, and then received an education. The first thing that I learned is that, while a deer may just stand there looking at you funny while you rope it, they are spurred to action when you start pulling on that rope. That deer EXPLODED. The second thing I learned is that pound for pound, a deer is a LOT stronger than a cow or a colt. A cow or a colt in that weight range I could fight down with a rope and with some dignity. A deer-- no Chance. That thing ran and bucked and twisted
Lady Astor’s alleged statement to Churchill, “If I were your wife, I would put poison in your tea,” and Churchill’s reply, “If I were your husband, I would drink it,” (or variations of this) shockingly, never took place, and are American in origin -- so say the leading experts. The famous lines, mentioned above, appeared in the Chicago Tribune newspaper in 1900, almost 40 years before Churchill’s supposed exchange with Mrs. Astor. Some American printed sources even predate 1900. Churchill’s famous insult to Irishman, George Bernard Shaw, also never happened. The story says that Shaw sent two tickets for the opening night of his play with the message to Churchill: “Bring a friend, if you have one.” Churchill is said to have replied, “I won’t be able to attend the first night, but I will attend the second night – if there is one.” Both Churchill and Shaw denied this exchange ever happened, and archive letters from both Churchill and Shaw prove this. Nevertheless, both men were skilled humorists in their own right and needed no assis-
American Humor vs. British Humour Cont. on Page 6
and pulled. There was no controlling it and certainly no getting close to it. As it jerked me off my feet and started dragging me across the ground, it occurred to me that having a deer on a rope was not nearly as good an idea as I had originally imagined. The only upside is that they do not have as much stamina as many other animals.
A brief 10 minutes later, it was tired and not nearly as quick to jerk me off my feet and drag me when I managed to get up. It took me a few minutes to realize this, since I was mostly blinded by the blood flowing out of the big gash in my head. At that point, I had lost my taste for corn-fed venison. I just wanted to get that devil creature off the end of that rope.
I figured if I just let it go with the rope hanging around its neck, it would likely die slow and painfully somewhere. At the time, there was no love at all between me and that deer. At that moment, I hated the thing, and I would venture a guess that the feeling was mutual. Despite the gash in my head and the several large knots where I had cleverly arrested the deer's momentum by bracing my head against various large rocks as it dragged me across the ground, I could still think clearly enough to recognize that there was a small chance that I shared
Chuckles Cont. on Page 12
The Paper • Page 6 • December 26, 2019
American Humor vs. British Humour Cont. from Page 5
tance from such fabricated stories. Churchill scholar, and British historian/author, Boris Johnson, who is widely quoted in the UK newspapers states: “Misquotes (and there are many) cling to him (Churchill) like burrs.” Partly because they very much sound like something he would say (but, in fact, he did not).
Social Butterfly Cont. from Page 3
engages your entire family in an experience that delights the senses, and helps each person get in touch with the magic of the Christmas spirit. You can watch as a fresh wreath is being constructed from the extra branches cut from the trees. Visit Santa in front of the life size Gluten Free Gingerbread house, and contribute to The National Celiac Association by buying a brick and writing your name on Deanna's Gluten Free Gingerbread brick wall.
Winston Churchill, who incidentally was half-American on his mother’s side, is considered one of the keenest minds in quick-wit and spontaneous humor, and needs no help from myth-makers. No American political figure can, genuinely, be called his equal in this regard. These two examples (Churchill vs. Lady Astor, and Churchill vs. Shaw) must first be put to rest, primarily because most have read of them, and also because it serves as an example of necessary caution.
As to the question, whether America or Britain produces the best humor is a most complicated one, not to mention a subjective one. But not totally impossible to fathom. In regards to the most profound wit and cleverness of disguise and timeless beauty and multi-layered meanings, Shakespeare would, without question, win-out with his Comedy plays. His range of humor from the sublime to the bawdy and the sexually risqué is formidable. It’s been well over four centuries since Shakespeare’s death and, still, his comedic crown remains most secure, by most worldwide accounts. The British wit, in the category of both social and political commentary is spearheaded by George Bernard Shaw, who humorously made a huge distinction separating the British from the Americans: “The British and the Americans are two different people separated by a common language.” Shaw was stating both a cultural and comedic fact. Though many Americans wish to downplay any such differences, humorous or otherwise. (Shaw remained a British subject his entire life, but took dual nationality in 1934.)
In the category of modern political wit and humor being, literally, dismantled by government, the Americans, by far, outdistance their British cousins. Such was the case with the celebrated American television show, “The Smothers Brothers Comedy
American Humor vs. British HumourCont. on Page 7
Bring your entire family (including your dogs-on leash) to continue a family tradition or start a new tradition of choosing the perfect Christmas tree to celebrate the holidays. In addition to our beautiful trees we have a great selection of fresh made wreaths, cedar garland, fall produce, gluten free baked goods, hot chocolate and cider. Free samples and friendly service. They are located at 2115 Miller Road, Escondido; Exit 29 from Hwy 15. We are fourth generation farmers here in Escondido, and we thought that having a Christmas tree event on our farm would provide our community with an opportunity to start new/old family traditions on a farm right here in the middle of Escondido as an alternative to the big box store experience. We hope you will come and join in the fun. See information below about the Gluten Free Gingerbread house and the video we did last year of our Christmas tree event. The Gingerbread House was created by Deana Smith's business, a local business called "Deana's Gluten Free" in Escondido. The farm stand has a giant life-size gluten free gingerbread house. (My source about the Gingerbread House) got free samples of a variety of gingerbread which she says was amazingly delicious! and "you can smell the house before you even see it." Check out "farm stand xmas tree vid 4.10.19" from Airleaf on Vimeo. The video is available for your viewing pleasure at https://vimeo.com/321080376.
Oceanside Chapter of Civitan to Meet on January 6th - Member and friends of the Oceanside Chapter of CIVITAN International, a non-profit community service organization, will be gathering at noon on Monday, January 6th for lunch and libations at Bagby's Restaurant, 601 S. Pacific Coast Hwy at Minnesota. Parking is available in Bagby's lot off Minnesota. Civitan has reserved space on the first floor, rear area. Everyone welcome!
Last Chance in 2019 to Make Lasting Difference in Lives of Youth - The Boys & Girls Club of Oceanside is asking you to make a lasting difference in the lives of the youth by supporting the Oceanside atrisk youth program helped by the B&G Club of Oceanside. Make the gift of a great future this year and make a lasting impact on the young lives of youth like Hunter Meyer. It's a unique partnership that keeps teens out of gangs. Contact the Club to find out about the program. Make a difference today; it's not too late. Thank you for your continued support and for giving the gift of a GREAT FUTURE to all of our Boys & Girls Club youth. Visit the website at www.bgcoceanside.org or call 760.433-8920. Multiple Exhibitions Opening at the Escondido Museum at CCAE - The
Social Butterfly Cont. on Page 7
Stopping Wild Horse Slaughter
This year I was principal co-author of AB 128 (Gloria), which requires any person purchasing a horse at auction, many of which are rounded up on public lands, to sign a sworn statement that the animal won’t be sold for slaughter. Since 1971, federal law has required the Forest Service and Bureau of Land Management to manage wild horses. While the BLM has prohibited the sale of healthy horses to slaughterhouses, the Forest Service has not enforced a similar prohibition.
Earlier this year I also signed a letter, along with many of my colleagues, to Senators Feinstein and Harris asking that the Senate include language in Interior Appropriations legislation prohibiting the destruction of federally protected wild horses and burros, and their sale for slaughter. Fortunately, the House and Senate have just agreed to include that language in their appropriations bill for the coming fiscal year. Few Americans eat horsemeat -- the last horse slaughterhouses closed in 2007. California voters weighed in on this issue in 1998 by passing Proposition 6, which bans the sale of horsemeat for human consumption. Nevertheless, horses have continued to be shipped out of the country for slaughter, destined for dinner tables in some Asian and
In 2018, California's Devil’s Garden Plateau, a preserve near the Oregon border, became seriously over-crowded with almost 4,000 wild horses in an area that could only support about 400. Hundreds of mostly younger animals would be available for adoption, but after 30 days, older horses could be sold for as little as $1 each. Those animals might go to sanctuaries, become ranch or pack horses, or sent to slaughter. This was clearly not the voters' intent when Proposition 6 was approved. With passage of AB 128 and recent congressional action, both federal and state governments are moving to finally ban horse slaughter. Assembly Republican Leader Marie Waldron, R-Escondido, represents the 75th Assembly District in the California Legislature, which includes the communities of Bonsall, Escondido, Fallbrook, Hidden Meadows, Pala, Palomar Mountain, Pauma Valley, Rainbow, San Marcos, Temecula, Valley Center and Vista.
5th District Supervisor
Our Last Board Meeting
Last week we held our final Board Meeting for 2019. It seems like just yesterday I was being sworn into office and now the year is almost over! Despite it being our last meeting, it was very eventful. The first Board letter we passed was to help the businesses of Poway. Due to the Boil Water Order that was issued a few weeks ago, businesses and restaurants were forced to temporarily close in Poway. However, 27 of those restaurants were able to receive temporary permits that cost $459. Last Wednesday, the Board voted unanimously to waive those fees relieving some of the burden for those businesses.
Also, on Wednesday, I partnered with Chairwomen Jacob to remove surcharges at our County airports. Currently, all aviation lease agreements included a surcharge for commercial subleases at our airports of 5%. After looking at similar airports, we decided to get rid of
the unnecessary charge. By eliminating the surcharge, we hope to spur additional growth and business opportunities. Finally, the Board unanimously approved a new multidisciplinary team that will provide secondary reviews to calls coming to the Child Welfare Services Hotline. One kid falling through the cracks is one too many. This new team will provide the safety that’s needed for those in child welfare.
Supervisor Jim Desmond To contact
North County Office – by appointment only 325 S. Melrose Ave., Suite 5200 Vista, CA 92081 Mon.-Fri., 8:00 a.m.-5:00 p.m. Website: www.supervisorjimdesmond.com Email: Jim.Desmond@sdcounty.ca.gov
The Paper • Page 7 • December 26, 2019
American Humor vs. British Humour Cont. from Page 6
Hour,” which ran on CBS from 1967 to 1969. The show was so popular that it knocked the mighty Bonanza out of first place in the ratings. However, the show’s political humor and satire during President Lyndon Johnson’s administration, proved to be its undoing. President Johnson was greatly agitated by the show’s political comedy and contacted close, personal friend, William S. Paley, head of CBS. The president’s behind-the-scenes talk with Paley resulted in the show’s cancellation in 1969 – a shocking decision since the show had good ratings.
Political leanings, even when couched in humor, can cause grave consequences for American comics and their livelihood of staying employed. Such was the case with comedians, Dick and Tommy Smothers. “So much for freedom of speech and comedy,” was Tommy Smothers’ parting reaction. During the tenure of “The Dick Cavett Show,” (ABC 1968-75), a similar drama unfolded behind the scenes; another seedy, pathetic condemnation that has no equivalency on British soil. Dick Cavett’s political satire and humorous monologues did not always sit well with President Richard Nixon, nor did his guests. Cavett’s show soon became unbearable to the American president. Shocking as it may be to read, herewith is President Richard Nixon’s private tape-recorded conversation with White House Chief of Staff, H. R. Haldeman regarding the Dick Cavett Show:
Nixon: “What the hell is a Cavett?” Haldeman: “Oh, Christ, he’s . . . he’s . . .” Nixon: “He’s terrible?” Haldeman: “He’s impossible. He loads every program . . . automatically, he’ll . . .” Nixon: “Nothing you can do about it, obviously?” Haldeman: “We’ve complained bitterly about the Cavett show.” Nixon: “Well – well is there any way we can screw him? That’s what I mean. There must be ways.” Haldeman: “We’ve been trying to.” Though the British have their equivalent of political satirists and humorists, American comics seem to have the dubious and brutal distinction of being – during modern times – more infamous and more
American Humor vs. British Humour Cont. on Page 8
Social Butterfly Cont. from Page 6
California Center for the Arts, Escondido Museum is pleased to announce its winter exhibitions, Endangered: Exploring California’s Changing Ecosystems and Finding Heaven in Hellhole Canyon open from Saturday, January 11th through March 8th, 2020. The exhibitions will open with a public reception from 6 - 8pm on Friday, January 10th. Museum Hours: Tuesday-Saturday, 10am-5pm; Sunday 1pm-5pm; closed Monday. General Museum Admission: Adults $12; Seniors and Students $6; Military and Youth under 18 Free.
Endangered: Exploring California’s Changing Ecosystems - This exhibition focuses on artworks that address the wonder and destruction of local flora and fauna throughout California. An interactive and educational contemporary art exhibition, Endangered, brings greater awareness to the current environmental issues in California. With more biodiversity and imperiled plants and animals than any other region in North America, California is challenged by climate change, habitat alteration, and pollution, among other concerns. Working with 21 Southern California artists, local scientists, students, and eco-conscious organizations this exhibition presents evidence of the dramatic changes happening in our local environment and encourages dialogue on how the public can participate in finding and implementing positive solutions. This exhibition is guest curated by Danielle Deery, Freelance Curator and former Curator and Director of Exhibits at Oceanside Museum of Art.
Finding Heaven in Hellhole Canyon - This fundraising exhibition highlights artworks inspired by the beauty of open space. Locdal artists depict images of Valley Center's Hellhole Canyon and the flora and fauna that inhabit the landscape. This exhibition includes the work of 14 local artists advocating for the preservation and enjoyment of California's natural environment. About California Center for the Arts, Escondido (CCAE) - With a mission of bringing people together to discover, create, and celebrate the arts, CCAE is the cultural center of North San Diego County. The Center's unique campus includes a 1,523-seat concert hall, a 404-seat theater, a contemporary art museum, art and dance studios, and a full-service conference center with meeting and banquet facilities. The Center also runs an extensive education program and produces free community events. The Center is located at 340 N. Escondido Blvd. in Escondido. The Ticket Office can be reached at (800) 988-4253. Tickets can also be purchased online. To learn more, including performance dates, times, and ticket information, visit artcenter.org. Daughters of the American Revolution Participates in Wreaths Across America
- Fort Rosecrans National Cemetery was once more the site for December’s Wreaths Across America Remember, Honor, Teach ceremony and laying of wreaths on veterans graves. The Daughters of the American Revolution (DAR) have participated in this for many years. Marty Sommercamp, De Anza Chapter, acted as Location Manager this year, and Director of District XIV, Rachel Jorgenson, Rincon del Diablo Chapter, helped with introduc-
Social Butterfly Cont. on Page 9
Historically Speaking by Tom Morrow
Here's another thumbnail sketch of a man who help build America -Thomas Edison. I hope each and every one of you have a nice and relaxing holiday season...
Upcoming: within the next few days, I will have my latest book finished, which will be available free of charge to subscribers of this weekly effort. It's a "primer" on World War II, which contains stories from previous columns over the past five years. These columns detail various events during that critical time in America's development from a sleepy, isolated country to world power. I've designed this for easy reading and a good way for young people to become familiar with our greatest and most important period in world history. Let me know if you'd like for me to forward you a copy of the manuscript (at no charge). Tom Edison: ‘The Wizard of Menlo Park’
Eventually, someone would have thrown an electric light onto the world for the benefit of mankind, but Thomas Alva Edison did it first. He gave us the electric light bulb and much more to help build America.
Known as “The Wizard of Menlo Park,” (New Jersey), Edison changed the world with the light bulb, motion picture camera, sound recordings, electric car batteries and more than 1,000 other inventions. It is impossible to spend each day not using something he invented or designed. Each time you turn on a light, watch a movie, take a photo, play recorded music, make a telephone call, or slip some batteries into a flashlight, Edison invented or developed it.
Thomas Alva Edison, born Feb. 11, 1847, has been described as the world's greatest inventor, influencing life around the world. He was one of the first to apply the principles of mass production and often is credited with the creation of the first industrial research laboratory. Edison and his close friend, Henry Ford revolutionized the mass production of consumer goods.
To power his incandescent light bulb system, Edison developed a method of delivering electricity to homes, businesses, and factories, which led to the development of the modern industrialized world. In 1878, he formed the Edison Electric Light Company with the backing of several financiers, including J.P. Morgan and members of the Vanderbilt family. Edison made the first public demonstration of his electric lighting on Dec. 31, 1879, in Menlo Park, N.J. But, Edison’s first invention that gained him wide-public notice was the phonograph in 1877. Although he obtained a patent for the phonograph, he did little to develop it until fellow inventor Alexander Graham Bell produced a phonograph-like device that used wax-coated cardboard cylinders.
Edison improved the microphone for telephones (at that time called a "transmitter") which was put in use in 1890 and, ironically, was used in all telephones along with the Bell receiver up until the 1980s.
It was during this time he said: "We will make electricity so cheap that only the rich will burn candles." In 1880, the Oregon Railroad and Navigation Company's new steamship, the SS Columbia, was the first commercial application for Edison's incandescent light bulb. After devising a commercially viable electric light bulb on Oct. 21, 1879, Edison developed an electric "utility" to compete with the existing gas light utilities. On Dec. 17, 1880, he founded the Edison Illuminating Company, and patented a system for electricity distribution.
As Edison expanded his “direct current” (DC) power delivery system, he received stiff competition from companies using former Edison employee Nicoli Tesla’s “alternating current” (AC) systems. From the early 1880s AC arc-lighting systems for streets and large spaces had been an expanding business throughout the U.S. With the development of transformers in Europe and by George Westinghouse’s electric company in the U.S., in 1885-1886, it became possible to transmit AC over longer distances using thinner and cheaper wires, and "stepped down" the voltage at the receiving destination. This method allowed AC to be used in street lighting, small businesses and domestic home customers. This created an even bigger market for Edison's patented low-voltage DC incandescent lighting. Edison and Tesla became embroiled in what was called “The Current War” to establish the ultimate delivery. In medical development Edison designed and produced the first commercially available fluoroscope, which used X-rays to make radiographs. The fundamental design of Edison's fluoroscope continues in use today.
Edison also was granted a patent for the motion picture camera, known as a "Kinetograph.” The matching “Kinetoscope” viewer was developed to be used in penny arcades, which was the origin of the movie industry. People could watch short films captured by the kinetograph camera. The kinetograph and kinetoscope were both first publicly exhibited May 20, 1891. Long before there were studios in Hollywood, Edison's movie studios in New Jersey and New York made close to 1,200 films. The majority of those productions were short films showing movement of everything from acrobats to parades to fire calls, including titles such as Fred Ott's Sneeze (1894), The Kiss (1896), The Great Train Robbery (1903), Alice's Adventures in Wonderland (1910), and the first Frankenstein film in 1910. Ironically, despite his many inventions and consumer developments, Edison died near bankruptcy on Oct. 18, 1931, suffering from diabetic complications. He is buried at his New Jersey home. Rights to many of his inventions ended up with J.P. Morgan, who had financed many of Edison’s various business ventures. The world is indebted to Edison for enriching our lives. SCAG SEZ: A harried husband just told me his money doesn't stay with him very long during the holiday time of year because his wife keeps saying, "Buy, buy." – Cecil Scaglione, Mature Life Features.
The Paper • Page 8 • December 26, 2019
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American Humor vs. British Humour Cont. from Page 7
harshly-punished by their political leaders, as high up as the President of the United States. To the point of TV program cancellations and secrettapings of sabotage.
Though Johnny Carson could plunge the political knife, he refused to twist it. He had certain boundary lines which he refused to cross over. Sidekick, Ed McMahon, spoke of this: “When Richard Nixon was badly stumbling around the White House with a drink in his hand, just falling apart, Johnny said, ‘You know, no more Nixon jokes. He’s a sick man and you just can’t do that.’” (Pioneers of Television, PBS video, 2008) When the British contingency of comics and comedians challenged America to a duel on their side of the Atlantic, the encounter would be totally different that the popular American TV show, “Last Comic Standing.” In this new arena, British and American comedians would exchange insults and address challenges on-the-spot, not just stand there and do a formula set of jokes for five minutes. Suddenly, the stakes were much higher, much broader, and much more demanding of
comedic skill. This new arena of distraction, pressure, and challenges can unravel even a seasoned comedy-opponent, like a simple ball of twine. As one television producer put it, “It’s like driving a car backwards down a mountain road and being funny and witty at the same time!”
Such comedy contests between Britain and America are nothing new. In a special report to the lofty New York Times back on July 6, 1986, Francis Clines reported a dismal result for American comedians under combat fire from their British counterparts. The New York Times reported: “In A Fight for Comic Supremacy, Yanks Lose!”
It all happened at Oxford Union, a debating society in the city of Oxford, England, where membership is drawn primarily from the University of Oxford, Britain’s third oldest University Union. The friendly clash between British and American comedians was later aired on American PBS television on March 24, 1987 (that was almost 33 years ago).
Legendary American comic, an alumnus from the immortal Catskill Mountains in upstate New York, Alan King, fired the opening salvo on behalf of all
American comedians. King quickly attacked the foundation of British humor in mocked seriousness: “You’ve got no mountains in England,” Alan King argued. “You can’t be funny in the moors!”
To Alan King’s credit, the heavily-entrenched British audience fell into convulsed laughter. King was an undisputed hit. And the Britons let him know it. After all, it’s only cricket to do so.
But, the fight had just begun. Blood had been drawn at Britain’s expense. A swift counter-attack would be launched by one of England’s greatest wits, Jasper Carrot. He would make a bold, mocknasty assumption that would undermine and topple much of America’s goldmine of classic humor: “Woody Allen is really English!” he pronounced to astonished make-believe-gasps throughout the hall. “He has to be English!” Jasper pleaded his case. “He has to be, because you can only get spectacles like the ones he wears from the National Health!” The war of words was now on. Comedy shields now up.
Amidst all of this unbridled fun and zaniness, an American student at Oxford suddenly rose from the safe comfort of his seat amongst the enemy,
the very encampment of heavily British assemblage and – in mock, straight-faced humor – said: “Frankly . . . we didn’t win the Second World War for you people only to be treated this way!” The audience collapsed in loud laughter. Again, another score -- this time from grassroots America.
Drawing himself up to his full height, British wit Jaspar Carrot had enough: “You Americans have destroyed British patience! We used to be a patient people – until you introduced your damned fastfood restaurants here! Now, Britons have begun to move toward hysteria – they no longer patiently wait an extra minute for their fish-and-chips as they used to!” Jaspar was now reaching a crescendo of intolerance: “Instead of British patience, we are now anxiously screaming over the counter: ‘Why are you taking so long?! What the hell are you doin’ – cookin’ the bloody food?!” In the end, the British won this televised comedy-encounter, smashing their American comedy opponents by a gargantuan
American Humor vs. British Humour Cont. on Page 9
The Paper • Page 9 • December 26, 2019
American Humor vs. British Humour Cont. from Page 8
2 to 1 margin based on the judging system.
The healthy debate continues with gusto, with other televised bouts of comedic jousting between American and British comedians having at it. More recently, American comic, Jack Black, and Britain’s Russell Kane, went head-to-head on the issue, creating quite an international stir in both the print and visual media.
Representing the United States, Jack Black, the multiple Golden Globes Award nominee and star of such comedy films as “School of Rock” and this year’s 2019 “Jumanji – the Next Level, threw out a bombshell: “Brits come from the brain but we Americans come from the #%* (genitals)! If a comedian becomes too popular in Britain where does he go? He’s going to come to the U. S. to test his real mettle.” Even within the arena of playful comedy such rough-housing can sometimes hurt.
And Jack Black wasn’t done. He wanted to nail the coffin lid down, securely: “I’m just going to say ‘Richard Pryor.’ Simple. True. Seize it. Deal with it. Your serve.”
But the British have never been known to be a race that would just lie down and let a steamroller pass over them. Even if odds seemed overwhelming for them. Their resilience is historic, even at times in harsh play, be it soccer, or tennis. Or comedic competition. Jack Black’s remark of the British having cerebral or ‘brainy’ humor as opposed to the down-in-the-trenches warfare of American comedy did not sit well with the British comics.
Britain’s Russel Kane refuses to lower himself in order to strike low. Rather, he walks dignified. And away from the temptation. Keeping his wits about him, he instead, surprises the ‘enemy’ with a softball. A gentle underhand lob of a deadly grenade which proves humor can be both intelligent and devastatingly funny – at the same time. Verbally pedaling backward, Kane resorts to deprecating British humor and leaves a minefield of explosive innuendo in his path: “No U. K. comic worth his salt would even attempt to argue that our comedy is superior – such is our modest sense of brilliance. British comedy is self-deprecation, self-destruction, selfeffacement. It’s so great that
to argue that it’s better would demean it.”
It is all a most intelligent, revealing intercourse of reasoning power, use of language, humor, and cultural clash and a major television-viewing audience is enthralled, as it should be. Some see the hidden beauty of what is happening on stage. Others do not. Nevertheless, it is classic PBS television, at its best.
Pulling himself up, Jack Black realizes the Briton has placed him deliciously on the ropes, so he calmly takes to his microphone: “I know you’re leading me into our own masterpiece, ‘The Pick of Destiny,’ but I want to bob and weave. When I say funny movie, I say ‘The Jerk.’ You won’t beat Steve Martin – that’s pretty much game, set, and match.” On this particular day, it’s the bottom of the ninth, bases are loaded.
By all judges’ score cards – and by overwhelming television viewers’ consensus – Briton’s Russel Kane serves up the inexorable truth and pick’s the bones clean of Jack Black’s movie, “The Jerk.”
Russell Kane sees the opening and with his comedic bat on fire, hits one out of the ballpark, way over the far fences, and into another country’s border line.
“Favorite movie over ‘The Jerk’?” Kane answers with a kill shot: “It would probably have to be ‘Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life.’ Much like Flaubert’s Madame Bovary was the first modern novel, I think ‘The Meaning of Life’ is probably the first modern comedy. And it’s still more modern than most stuff you’ll ever watch today.” Step by step, the British comedians have matched us. It is a received myth that they are always the staid, polite, reserved coterie of comics, with dry, boring humor delivered from a deadpan face. That is a most dangerous mistake we often make in perceiving them. They are as eclectic as we are. Perhaps more so.
They can be offensively ridiculous as Benny Hill who bulldozed over many censors on sex and nudity on television; or classically subtle as Peter Sellers in the original Pink Panther films; or outwardly inyour-face as “Monty Python and the Holy Grail,” or just naturally and visually funny as bulbous and crooked-eyed Marty Feldman in “Young Frankenstein.” However, when it comes to
comedy films, then America struts her stuff. The ledger of American comedy films resemble the New York Yankee’s “Murderers Row.” From “Some Like It Hot,” to “Rush Hour” (and sequels) to Eddie Murphy’s “Nutty Professor” (and sequels) to Will Ferrell, Steve Martin, Chris Farley, Jim Carrey and Billy Crystal, American comedy movies continue to dominate the world’s box office in popularity. There is virtually no comparison with the burgeoning treadmill of Hollywood movies. In this regard, America rules supreme on most every account. Even by British consensus, and by their own measuring rods, they relinquish this crown to us Americans. In a final analysis, it is most refreshing that in this day and age, a battlefield has been created where humor is the sword, comedic wit is the shield, and laughter is the drawn blood. On such a battlefield, there shall be no losers. Only victors – on both sides. PALA CASINO RESORT & SPA’S INCREDIBLE TRIBUTE TO BEATLES LEGEND, PAUL McCARTNEY.
Speaking of great English-Americans, the hugely-popular Pala Casino Resort & Spa has scheduled one of the most exciting and incredible musical events in the world titled: “Live and Let Die,” a musical tribute to Beatles legend, Paul McCartney, by famous tribute musician, Tony Kishman! Tony Kishman not only looks like Paul McCartney, but even the Beatles producer, George Martin, says: “Tony Kishman sounds like Paul McCartney.” And even Paul McCartney, himself, says: “Tony Kishman is a great musician.” This incredible concert is scheduled for Friday, January 31, 2020 at the Pala Events Center, at 8 p.m. This event is FREE for Pala Casino “Privileges Card Members.” YOU can obtain a FREE “Privilege Card” at NO CHARGE in person at the Pala Casino Resort & Spa. Call for details: (877) 946-7252. Whatever you do – DON’T MISS THIS TRULY AMAZING EVENT!!
This is Friedrich Gomez’s 147th cover story for The Paper!
The Social Butterfly Cont. from Page 7
tions. Oceanside’s Santa Margarita Chapter contributed some of the 8000 wreaths that were laid this year. Unfortunately, 8000 is a mere dent in the amount of wreaths needed to cover ten times that many veterans graves. Pictured is chapter member and Honorary Chapter Regent Wanda Prosser laying wreaths at the graves of Sherman J. Hill, US Navy; Edward Moore, US Marines Corps and Sydnor A Smith, US Army. As long as we speak their name, they will never be forgotten. Wreaths may be purchased throughout the year for $15 each through www.wreathsacrossamerica.org
DAR Chapter Donates to Gary Sinise Foundation - The Santa Margarita Chapter, Daughters of the American Revolution (DAR), member Adele Lancaster, is in the second year of a two year term as Regent of the California State Society Daughters of the American Revolution (CSSDAR). A project for her term has been partnering with the Gary Sinise Foundation’s R.I.S.E. Program to support the construction of a kitchen in one of two homes currently being built for veterans who have given so much for us. The kitchen is the heart of the home where loved ones gather and meals and memories are made. Funds are being raised through donations from the 115 chapters throughout the state. At a recent event at CSSDAR headquarters in Glendora a check for $25,000 was presented to Elizabeth Fields, Chief Operating Officer for the Foundation. (See photo below) Mrs.
Lancaster reported that ‘this first check represents the passion California Daughters have for the men and women who serve to protect and defend both at home and around the world and especially for those who have sacrificed so much more than anyone should ever expect from another’. The Daughters are well known for their support of veterans and their families. This is one way to show that we care and truly appreciate the sacrifices that they make for us. The DAR is open to any female eighteen years of age or older who is lineally descended from an ancestor who assisted in some way in the fight for independence in the American Revolution. Visit www.santamargarita.californadar.org
DAR Chapter Speaker was Ginny Krepps Unanue of Carlsbad Historical Society - The Santa Margarita Chapter,
The Social Butterfly Cont. on Page 10
The Paper • Page 10 • December 26, 2019
Social Butterfly Cont. from Page 9
Daughters of the American Revolution, held their last meeting of 2019 at Heritage Hall in Magee Park, Carlsbad, CA. Ginny Krepps Unanue, member and past president of the Carlsbad Historical Society, gave a short talk on how clothes were washed back in the day. She read a letter from a grandmother to a granddaughter explaining exactly how to do your washing and also displayed some old fashioned washing implements that are found in the historical Magee house and barn. An honorarium was presented to Ms. Unanue for the Carlsbad Historical Society Historic Preservation of the property. A catered buffet breakfast was followed by a short business meeting with a touching remembrance of December 7th, 1941. Toys For Tots were collected and the members toured the Magee House before heading home. The DAR is open to any female eighteen years of age or older who is lineally descended from an ancestor who assisted in some way the colonists fight for independence in the American Revolution. Visit www.santamargarita.californiadar.org
What's Up Downtown Oceanside - The MainStreet Oceanside Foundation has a calendar of events for the "What's Up Downtown Oceanside" program. There are several programs going on now downtown Oceanside through the end of December, but a new calendar will be available soon. To find out more, contact MainStreet Foundation, at 701 Mission Avenue, Oceanside 92054, phone 760.754.4512, or visit the website at www.mainstreetoceanside.com.
SDHS Reminds Pet Parents to Microchip Pets Before the Holidays - The holidays are great fun for people, but they can be scary for our pets. Loud New Year’s celebrations and fireworks can be stressful for animals, and opening doors for holiday guests provides plenty of opportunities for spooked pets to flee, resulting in a higher number of stray animals entering the shel-
ter. In anticipation of the upcoming holidays, San Diego Humane Society is reminding pet parents to protect your pet with a microchip, and ensure existing microchips are up-to-date with current contact information. Sadly, one out of every three pets gets lost during her lifetime, and only one in 10 lost pets are found. Microchipping your pet could make the difference of a lifetime. San Diego Humane Society offers microchips for $15 at vaccination clinics at the following times and locations: Phone # is 619.299.7012, or visit the website at sdhumane.org. Escondido Campus: 3500 Burnet Drive, Escondido, CA 92027; every Saturday from 8-10am. Oceanside Campus: 572 Airport Road, Oceanside, CA 92058; every Wednesday from 8:30-10:30am.
Microchipping b-roll is available here: https://spaces.hightail.com/space/ObxjulO puU. Holiday photos of pets are available h e r e : https://spaces.hightail.com/space/fjVt2vD JHC.
Training Classes for Puppies and Dogs It's National Train Your Dog Month! Training is an important tool for pet owners to ensure our pets are well-behaved and reliable. But did you know it's also important for your pet's well-being? Training gives us a reliable way to communicate with our pets, sets expectations for behavior in a variety of environments and helps them better navigate situations they encounter. Call the Humane Society at 619.299.7012 to see if there are any classes to be held in North County. The address of the campuses are listed here: Escondido, 3500 Burnet Drive, Escondido 92027; Oceanside (dogs), 2905 San Luis Rey Road, Oceanside 92058; Oceanside (cats, small animals), 572 Airport Road, Oceanside 92058; and San Diego Campus, 5500 Gaines St., San Diego 92110. Because dogs are constantly learning from their experiences, it's never too early or too late to start training!
Contact Contactlyle e davis @ 760.747.7119
The Pastor Says...
Pastor Tom Fry (Retired) Church of the Nazarene
Phoenix is pet of the week at your Rancho Coastal Humane Society. He’s a 4 month old, 4-1/2 pound, male, Flame Point Siamese mix kitten.
Phoenix doesn’t even need you to touch him. He begins purring as soon as you walk into the room. He has a very outgoing personality. Phoenix was transferred to Rancho Coastal Humane Society from another shelter through the FOCAS program.
The $125 adoption fee for Phoenix includes medical exams, vaccinations, neuter, and registered microchip. For more information call 760-753-6413, visit Rancho Coastal Humane Society at 389 Requeza Street in Encinitas, or log on to SDpets.org.
Baxter is a 7-year-old Terrier looking for a home. He is a happy-go-lucky boy who loves to play! Although he likes to run around, he is just as happy relaxing with his humans. He is also house-trained! Baxter can be protective over his food and other items, so we recommend an adult-only home. To see if Baxter is the pup for you, come and meet him at our Escondido Campus! His adoption fee includes his neuter, current vaccinations, permanent microchip identification, a certificate for a free veterinary exam, waived enrollment fee for medical insurance from PetFirst and a license for residents in the city limits of Carlsbad, Del Mar, Encinitas, Escondido, Imperial Beach, Oceanside, Poway, San Diego, San Marcos, Santee, Solana Beach and Vista. Baxter is available for adoption at San Diego Humane Society’s Escondido Campus at 3500 Burnet Drive. To learn more about making him part of your family, please call (619) 299-7012.
When is Christmas Over?
It’s a question almost every child asks at one time or another. The date on this issue of The Paper is December 26 and for some, Christmas is already over. Try finding Christmas Carols on the radio today. Or, if you dare, visit a big store. The decorations are down, maybe pushed into a corner somewhere, the happy spirit is gone as shoppers jockey for position to get bargains or exchange their gifts. The Christmas spirit has left the building.
On the other hand, in England and many of the commonwealth countries, today is Boxing Day. It has nothing to do with fighting or putting away Christmas Decorations. It began when Lords of the Manor
(think Downton Abbey) distributed gift boxes and leftover Christmas dinner to the servants who had to work on Christmas. Some think the boxes were alms boxes in the churches during the Advent season to collect funds. On December 26, clergy distributed the contents to the needy. Some traditions observe the Twelve Days of Christmas, like the song, and distribute gifts on the 12th day, January 6. It would drive the kids crazy but imagine buying all your gifts at “after Christmas” sales.
So, the child’s question becomes our question: When is Christmas over?
The Bible says that when the time was right, God sent his Son to the world. He would be born of a woman. A baby who brought Joy to the World and Peace on Earth. He grew into a man who would give his life on the cross that all mankind might have life and have it more abundantly. And that abundance continues today through the Holy Spirit.
So, while you can put away decorations, gifts, even artificial trees, you can’t really put away Christmas because, you see, Christmas is never over. It lives in our hearts all year long.
• Page 11 •
December 26, 2019
A Weekly Message from the Mayor of Your Community published in the belief that it is important for elected leaders to communicate with their constituents and that constituents have a means of hearing from their elected leaders.
San Marcos • Mayor Rebecca Jones
San Marcos Creek Project Breaks Ground
On Dec. 11, the City of San Marcos held a groundbreaking ceremony to mark the start of construction for the San Marcos Creek Project. The project will minimize flooding risks, preserve and enhance creek habitat, and build a new park and trails. Here's an overview of the construction schedule: • In Winter 2020, construction will begin with the closure of Bent Avenue for bridge construction above the Creek. • In Fall 2020, after construction at Bent Avenue is completed, construction will shift to the closure of Via Vera Cruz, for bridge construction above the Creek in that location. • In Spring 2021, the City anticipates starting habitat and park construction and finishing construction and opening the project to the public in Fall 2021. Those who live in the area or visit the surrounding neighborhoods will notice construction-related noise, increased construction vehicle traffic, detours and lane and road closures during construction. Here’s how you can stay informed: • Visit www.san-marcos.net/creek. • Text SMCreek to 484848 to sign up for text updates. • Call our project hotline at 877-SMCREEK • Email email@example.com
Escondido • Mayor Paul “Mac” Mcnamara Greetings Escondido,
Continuing with Homelessness from last week. When you talk in general terms about the cause of how a person ended up homeless, a lot of it goes back to a mental health issue. We are all familiar with those causes- depression, drug or alcohol addiction, etc. The challenge is figuring out how to get the homeless person off the street and into the right program. Remember the homeless person has a legal right to remain homeless. So you cannot force someone off the street except in a situation where it is determined that they are a danger to the themselves or others.
Right now, all the North County cities are working closely in an ad hoc committee to address the housing piece of this solution. The programs etc. are being addressed at the Supervisor level and non-government entities like Interfaith for example. We need more housing which we are calling transitional housing. Once you get someone stable, they can begin a program that has the ultimate goal of them returning to society as fully functional members. Semper Fi, Mac, Paul P. McNamara Mayor of Escondido, firstname.lastname@example.org
The P a p e r o f f e r s t h e rig h t c a n d i d a t e a n abo v e - a v e r a g e - e a r n in g s s a l e s - c a re e r oppo r t u n i t y. Yo u w i l l recei v e o n - g oi n g t r a i n in g , p ro m o t i o n a l op p o r t u n i t i e s , a n d ot h e r a d v a n t a g e s . Thi s i s a c a l l - i n t e n sive, s e r v i c e - o r i e n t e d posi t i o n . Yo u w i l l b e conn e c t i n g i n t e l l i g e n t bu s i n e s s o p e r a t o r s with a rece p t i v e - b u t - o f t e n har d - t o - re a c h a u d i ence.
Our n e w s p a p e r i s w e l l rece i v e d b y re a d e r s who p o s s e s s h i g h e rthan-average
d i s posable incomes, a n d who demand goods a n d service of high quality.
Advertisers appreciate our c ommunications v e h i cle because it prov i d e s interesting, comm u n ity-involved journ a l i s m that attracts an a t t e n tive, loyal readership.
We’ll help you get o r i e n ted and started in t h is high-earnings c a re er in the intrigui n g f i eld of advertising sales. To apply, please email your resume to: email@example.com
Vista • Mayor Judy Ritter
Recycling Christmas Trees
During this time of year, many residents ask how to dispose of Christmas trees. The City’s residential EDCO customers may place Christmas trees curbside on their regular collection day beginning December 26 through January 11 at no extra charge. All trees must be cut to four feet or less in length when placed curbside. Trimmings, including tinsel and the stand must be removed. Organic decorations, such as natural garland and wreathes, can also be placed in the residential designated yard waste container, as well as any Christmas trees after January 11. Trees placed inside the yard waste containers must be cut to fit into the yard waste cart. For more information, residents are encouraged to contact the City’s contracted waste hauler EDCO at 760.727.1600. Best wishes to all as we head into the New Year!
Oceanside • Mayor Peter Weiss 2020 CENSUS UPDATE
- Census 2020 is around the corner and for the first time, people have the option of responding online, by mail or phone; materials are provided in 13 languages online or by phone. Invitations to respond will be mailed mid-March. National Census Day is April 1, 2020, which is the big national media day and the big push for participation.
Staff will be providing extra assistance on this day at computer kiosks in Resource Centers and the Library for Census responses. People can submit their census response any time from the receipt of an invitation through April 30, 2020. An accurate count will directly impact funding, allow for fair representation of the population, and provide reliable data for research. Additional resources about Census 2020 may be found on the City website.
PLANNING A SPECIAL EVENT IN 2020?
Wedding? Quinceaneras? Reception? Birthday party? Recital? Church Event?
First you need to pick your date, then your venue! The Clubhouse of the Escondido Woman’s Club is the place to be! 751 No. Rose, Escondido Large kitchen and stage Maximum 170 people 24-hour insurance required Call 760.743 9178
The Paper â€˘ Page 12 â€˘ December 26, 2019
Chuckles Cont. from Page 6
some tiny amount of responsibility for the situation we were in. I didn't want the deer to have to suffer a slow death, so I managed to get it lined back up in between my truck and the feeder - a little trap I had set before hand...kind of like a squeeze chute. I got it to back in there and I started moving up so I could get my rope back. Did you know that deer bite? They do! I never in a million years would have thought that a deer would bite somebody, so I was very surprised when ..... I reached up there to grab that rope and the deer grabbed hold of my wrist. Now, when a deer bites you, it is not like being bit by a horse where they just bite you and slide off to then let go. A deer bites you and shakes its head--almost like a big dog. They bite HARD and it hurts.
The proper thing to do when a deer bites you is probably to freeze and draw back slowly. I tried screaming and shaking instead. My method was ineffective.
It seems like the deer was biting and shaking for several minutes, but it was likely only several seconds. I, being smarter than a deer (though you may be questioning that claim by now), tricked it. While I kept it busy tearing the tendons out of my right arm, I reached up with my left hand and pulled that rope loose. That was when I got my final lesson in deer behavior for the day.
Deer will strike at you with their front feet. They rear right up on their back feet and strike right about head and shoulder level, and their hooves are surprisingly sharp... I learned a long time ago that, when an animal -like a horse --strikes at you with their hooves and you can't get away easily, the best thing to do is try to make a loud noise and make an aggressive move towards the animal. This will usually cause them to back down a bit so you can escape.
This was not a horse. This was a deer, so obviously, such trickery would not work. In the course of a millisecond, I devised a different strategy. I screamed like a woman and tried to turn and run. The reason I had always been told NOT to try to turn and run from a horse that paws at you is that there is a good chance that it will hit you in the back of the head. Deer may not be so different from horses after all, besides being twice as strong and 3 times as evil, because the second I turned to run, it hit me right in the back of the head and knocked me down. Now, when a deer paws at you and knocks you down, it does not immediately leave. I suspect it does not recognize that the danger has passed. What they do instead is paw your back and jump up and down
on you while you are laying there crying like a little girl and covering your head.
I finally managed to crawl under the truck and the deer went away. So now I know why when people go deer hunting they bring a rifle with a scope......to sort of even the odds!! All these events are true so help me God...An Educated Farmer. Company Memo TO:
November 1, 2019
Gala Christmas Party
I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23rd, starting at noon in the private function room at the Grill House. There will be a cash bar and plenty of drinks! We'll have a small band playing traditional carols... feel free to sing along. And don't be surprised if our CEO shows up dressed as Santa Claus!
A Christmas tree will be lit at 1:00 PM. Exchanges of gifts among employees can be done at that time; however, no gift should be over $10.00 to make the giving of gifts easy for everyone's pockets. This gathering is only for employees! Our CEO will make a special announcement at that time! Merry Christmas to you and your family, Patty ___________________________ Company Memo
FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director TO:
November 2, 2019
Gala Holiday Party
In no way was yesterday's memo intended to exclude our Jewish employees. We recognize that Hanukkah is an important holiday, which often coincides with Christmas, though unfortunately not this year. However, from now on, we're calling it our "Holiday Party." The same policy applies to any other employees who are not Christians and to those still celebrating Reconciliation Day. There will be no Christmas tree and no Christmas carols will be sung. We will have other types of music for your enjoyment.
Happy Holidays to you and your family, Patty ____________________________ Company Memo
FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director TO:
DATE: November 3, 2019
Regarding the note I received from a member of Alcoholics Anonymous requesting a nondrinking table, you didn't sign your name.
I'm happy to accommodate this request, but if I put a sign on a table that reads, "AA Only", you wouldn't be anonymous anymore. How am I supposed to handle this? Somebody?
And sorry, but forget about the gift exchange, no gifts are allowed since the union members feel that $10.00 is too much money and the executives believe $10.00 is a little chintzy. REMEMBER: NO GIFTS EXCHANGE WILL BE ALLOWED. Patty ____________________________ Company Memo FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director To:
Generic Holiday Party
DATE: November 4, 2019
What a diverse group we are! I had no idea that December 20th begins the Muslim holy month of Ramadan, which forbids eating and drinking during daylight hours.
There goes the party! Seriously, we can appreciate how a luncheon at this time of year does not accommodate our Muslim employees' beliefs. Perhaps the Grill House can hold off on serving your meal until the end of the party or else package everything for you to take it home in little foil doggy baggy. Will that work? Meanwhile, I've arranged for members of Weight Watchers to sit farthest from the dessert buffet, and pregnant women will get the table closest to the restrooms. Gays are allowed to sit with each other. Lesbians do not have to sit with Gay men, each group will have their own table. Yes, there will be flower arrangement for the Gay men's table. To the person asking permission
to cross dress, the Grill House asks that no cross-dressing be allowed, apparently because of concerns about confusion in the restrooms. Sorry.
We will have booster seats for short people. Low-fat food will be available for those on a diet.
I am sorry to report that we cannot control the amount of salt used in the food . The Grill House suggests that people with high blood pressure taste a bite first. There will be fresh "low sugar" fruits as dessert for diabetics, but the restaurant cannot supply "no sugar" desserts. Sorry! Did I miss anything?!
Patty ____________________________ Company Memo
FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director TO:
All F*%^ing Employees
The F*%^ing Holiday
November 5, 2019
I've had it with you vegetarian pricks! We're going to keep this party at the Grill House whether you like it or not, so you can sit quietly at the table furthest from the "grill of death," as you so quaintly put it, and you'll get your f*%^ing salad bar, including organic tomatoes. But you know, tomatoes have feelings, too. They scream when you slice them. I've heard them scream. I'm hearing them scream right NOW!
The rest of you weirdos can kiss my ass. I hope you all have a rotten holiday! Drive drunk and die,
The Bitch from Hell!
____________________________ Company Memo
FROM: Joan Bishop, Acting Human Resources Director DATE: November 6, 2019
Patty Lewis and Holiday
Holiday Party cancelled. Happy Whatever! Joan
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The Mighty Mojo Page The Paper
• Page 14 • December 26, 2019
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2317 Old Foothill Drive, Vista, CA. 92084. This business is registered by: Vista
Vista, Ca. 92084 corporation. First day of business n/a.
/s/Keith Allan Comey Filed with Ernest J. Dronenburg Clerk/Recorder of 01/02
/s/Terry L. Moxley, Treasurer Filed with Ernest J. Dronenburg Jr., County
San Diego on 12/03/2019 12/26/2019,
This business is conducted by a
2317 Old Foothill Drive
Vista, CA. 92084
1642 Lisa Ave.,
J&M’s Family Restaurant 1215 E. Valley Parkway Escondido
Specializing Electric & Plumbing, Ceiling Fan Special. Home Repairs. Free Estimates. 760.799.5963
FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME
San Diego on 11/26/2019 12/05, 12/12, 12/19 & 12/26/2019
Where homestyle cooking is just the beginning…
Have Items for the Social Butterfly? Email them to: firstname.lastname@example.org
Twas the night before Christmas, he lived all alone, in a one bedroom house made of plaster and stone.
I had come down the chimney with presents to give, and to see just who in this home did live. I looked all about, a strange sight I did see, no tinsel, no presents, not even a tree.
No stocking by mantle, just boots filled with sand, and on the wall pictures of far distant lands.
With medals and badges, awards of all kinds, a sobering thought came to my mind.
For this house was different, so dark and so dreary, the home of a soldier, now I could see clearly. The soldier lay sleeping, silent, alone, curled up on the floor in this one bedroom home.
The face was so gentle, the room in such disorder, not how I pictured a United States soldier. Was this the hero of whom I'd just read? Curled up on a poncho, the floor for a bed? I realized the families that I saw this night, owed their lives to these soldiers who were willing to fight. Soon round the world, the children would play, and grownups would celebrate a bright Christmas day.
They all enjoyed freedom each month of the year, because of the soldiers, like the one lying here. I couldn't help wonder how many lay alone, on a cold Christmas eve in a land far from home. The very thought brought a tear to my eye, I dropped to my knees and started to cry. The soldier awakened and I heard a rough voice, ""Santa don't cry, this life is my choice;
I fight for freedom, I don't ask for more, my life is my God, my country, my corps." The soldier rolled over and soon drifted to sleep,
I couldn't control it, I continued to weep. I kept watch for hours, so silent and still, and we both shivered from the cold evening's chill.
I didn't want to leave on that cold, dark, night this guardian of honor so willing to fight. Then the soldier rolled over, with a voice soft and pure, whispered, "Carry on Santa, it's Christmas day, all is secure."
One look at my watch, and I knew he was right. "Merry Christmas my friend, and to all a good night." By Lance Corporal James M. Schmidt
Photo at left: Theodore Roosevelt addressing the public on beng an American
Theodore Roosevelt's ideas on Immigrants and being an AMERICAN in 1907
'In the first place, we should insist that if the immigrant who comes here in good faith becomes an American and assimilates himself to us, he shall be treated on an exact equality with everyone else, for it is an outrage to discriminate against any such man because of creed, or birthplace, or origin. But this is predicated upon the person's becoming in every facet an American, and nothing but an American ... There can be no divided allegiance here. Any man who says he is an American, but something else also, isn't an American at all. We have room for but one flag, the American flag ... We have room for but one language here, and that is the English ... And we have room for but one sole loyalty and that is a loyalty to the American people.' Theodore Roosevelt 1907
FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME
#2019-9028777 The name of the business, Alterations located
Santa Fe Rd., Suite 103, San Marcos, Ca. 92078. This business is registered by: Hafifa Sharify 602 Chesterfield Circle San Marcos, CA. 92069 This business is conducted by an individual. First day of business n/a. /s/ Hafifa Sharify Filed
Diego on 12/03/2019 12/19,
and 01/09/2020 FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME
#2019-9029568 The name of the business, Bright North Accounting, located at 325 Carlsbad Village
Carlsbad, CA. 92008. This
registered by: My Local CFO 2087 Westwood Dr. Carlsbad, CA. 92008 This
corporation. First day of business n/a. /s/
Diego on 12/13/2019 12/26/2019, 01/02, 01/09 and 01/16/2020 FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #2019-9029898 The name of the business, Enjoy Comfort While You Clean, located at 1595 ArcherRd.,San Marcos, CA. 92078. This business is registered by: Ramona Marie and Timothy Paul Probasco 1595 Archer Rd. San Marcos, CA. 92078 This business is conducted by a Married Couple. First day of business 12/15/2019 /s/ Timothy Paul Probasco Filed with Ernest J. Dronenburg Jr., County Clerk/Recorder of San Diego on 12/18/2019 12/26/2019, 01/02, 01/09 and 01/16/2020
FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME
#2019-9028767 The name of the business, Vista
located at 245 Main St., Vista, CA. 92083. This
registered by: Vista Village Realty, Inc. 245 Main St. Vista, CA. 92083 This
Diego on 12/03/2019 12/26/2019, 01/02, 01/09 and 01/16/2020
FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #2019-9028358 The name of the business, Celestial Sea Thoroughbreds, located at 38987 Hwy 79, Warner Springs, CA. 92086 This business is registered by: Richard Eugene and Gail Tami Cornwell 7422 Seastar, #4, Huntington Beach, CA. 92648 This business is conducted by a Married Couple. First day of business 11/25/19. /s/Richard Eugene Cornwell Filed with Ernest J. Dronenburg Jr., County Clerk/Recorder of San Diego on 11/25/2019 12/05, 12/12, 12/19 & 12/26/2019
To place Legal Ads Call The Paper 760.747.7119
NOTICE OF INTENDED DECISION (Administrative)
The Planning Division Manager of the City of San Marcos has considered the proposed project and does intends to APPROVE the Director’s Permit DP19-0023 on January 6, 2020. Project No.: DP19-0023 Applicant(s): David Kubly, Goodwill Industries of San Diego Request: Director’s Permit Renewal to allow the continued operation of second hand bookstore within a 3,110 square foot tenant space at 683 S. Rancho Santa Fe Road within the Commercial (C) Zone of the Business/Industrial District. Environmental Determination: In accordance with the California Environmental Quality Act (CEQA), the City of San Marcos did find the project Categorically Exempt (EX19-040) pursuant to Section 15301 Class 1 of the California Code of Regulations (CCR), in that this is an existing facility with no expansion. Location of the Property: 683 S Rancho Santa Fe Road, more particularly described as: Parcel E of Parcel Map No. 82-068467 in the City of San Marcos, County of San Diego, State of California, Filed in the Office of County Recorder of San Diego County on March 12, 1982, as Instrument No. 82-068467 of Official Records. Assessor’s Parcel Number: 221031-42-00. Further information about this notice can be obtained from Jordan Yanke, Assistant Planner by calling 760-744-1050 extension 3204 or via email email@example.com. NOTICE: Any interested person may appeal the decision of the Planning Division Manager to the Planning Commission provided the appeal fee is paid ($20 for residents; $1,155 for nonresidents) and a written appeal is submitted to the Planning Division Secretary within ten (10) calendar days of the date of the decision (due no later than 5:30 PM on January 16, 2020). The written appeal should specify the reasons for the appeal and the grounds upon which the appeal is based. The City’s Planning Commission will then consider the filed appeal/s at a later public hearing. The Planning Division can be contacted at 760-744-1050, extension 3233 or firstname.lastname@example.org. The City of San Marcos is committed to making its programs, services and activities accessible to individuals with disabilities. If you require accommodation to participate in any City program, service or activity, please contact the City Clerk’s office at 1 Civic Center Drive, San Marcos, CA. 92069, or call 760-744-1050, extension 3145. Phil Scollick, City Clerk, City of San Marcos. PD: 12/26/19. FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #2019-9029399 The name of the business, Stellar Strategist, located at 1930 W. San Marcos, Blvd., #258, San Marcos, CA. 92078 This business is registered by: Jannine Oberg 1930 W. San Marcos Blvd.,#258 San Marcos, CA. 92078 This business is conducted by an individual. First day of business 12/10/2004. /s/Jannine Oberg Filed with Ernest J. Dronenburg Jr., County Clerk/Recorder of San Diego on 12/11/2019 12/19, 12/26/2019, 01/02 & 01/09/2020
• Page 15 • December 26, 2019
FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME
The name of the business, Tacos n Beers, located at 1514 Linda Vista Dr., San Marcos, CA. 92078. This business is registered by: Jaime A Garcia Fuentes 619 Cocapah St. Vista, Ca. 92083 Anastacio Delgado 243 Calle Del Sol Vista, CA. 92083 This business is conducted by a General Partnership. First day of business n/a. /s/ Jaime A. Garcia Fuentes Filed
Diego on 11/18/2019 12/12, 12/19, 12/26/2019, and 01/02/2020
FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #2019-9028525 The name of the business, Kalitara Clothing Company, located at 660 Banjo Ct., San Marcos, CA. 92069. This business is registered by: Cindy Lou Sepulveda 660 Banjo Ct. San Marcos CA. 92069 This business is conducted by an individual. First day of business n/a. /s/Cindy Lou Sepulveda. Founder/Owner Filed with Ernest J. Dronenburg Jr., County Clerk/Recorder of San Diego on 11/27/2019 12/12/, 12/19, 12/26/2019 & 01/02/2020
FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #2019-9028924 The name of the business, Stressfreefuture.com, located at 306 W. El Norte Pkwy #27, Escondido, CA. 92026. This business is registered by: Servbs.com., Inc. 306 W. El Norte Pkwy #27 Escondido, CA. 92026 This business is conducted by a corporation. First day of business 12/05/19.. /s/Chris Donahue, President Filed with Ernest J. Dronenburg Jr., County Clerk/Recorder of San Diego on 12/05/2019 12/12/, 12/19, 12/26/2019 & 01/02/2020 FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME
FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #2019-9029045 The name of the business, Los Cabos Mexican and Seafood #2, 601 N. Broadway, Suite D, Escondido, CA. 92025. This business is registered by: Arturo Pena Estrada 32856 Whitehaven Ct. Menifee, CA. 92584 This business is conducted by an individual. First day of business 12/6/19. /s/Arturo Pena Estrada Filed with Ernest J. Dronenburg Jr., County Clerk/Recorder of San Diego on 12/6/2019 12/19, 12/26/2019, 01/02 & 01/09/2020
FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #2019-9029679 The name of the business, Village Voice, O.H. Village Voice, located at 4037 Arcadia Way, Oceanside, CA. 92056. This business is registered by: Ocean Hills Journalism Club 4037 Arcadia Way Oceanside, Ca. 92056 This business is conducted by a corporation. First day of business 7/22/1996. Gerhard A. Baur, Treasurer Filed with Ernest J. Dronenburg Jr., County Clerk/Recorder of San Diego on 12/16/2019 12/19, 12/26/2019, 01/02 & 01/09/2020 FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #2019-9029775 The name of the business, Rebate Real Estate, Rebate Real Estate 4U, located at 1755 Elevado Rd., Vista, CA. 92084. This business is registered by: John Chisholm Feehan 1755 Elevado Rd. Vista, Ca. 92084 This business is conducted by an individual. First day of business 12/17/1996. John Chisholm Feehan Filed with Ernest J. Dronenburg Jr., County Clerk/Recorder of San Diego on 12/17/2019 12/26/2019, 01/02, 01/09 & 01/16/2020
#2019-9029426 The name of the business, Aerials Equip, located at 1549 Morenci St., San Diego, CA. 92110. This business is registered by: Trevor Ray Hall 1549 Morenci St. San Diego, CA. 92110 This business is conducted by an individual. First day of business n/a. /s/Trevor Ray Hall Filed
Diego on 12/12/2019 12/19, 12/26/2019, 01/02 & 01/09/2020 FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #2019-9028096 The name of the business, SDNCKG, located at 3332 Camino Coronado, Carlsbad, CA. 92009. This business is registered by: Carol M. Myers 3332 Camino Coronado Carlsbad, CA. 92009 Tina Rounsavell 13141 Tawny Way Poway, CA. 92064 Mary Van Orsol 1806 Fuerte St. Fallbrook, CA. 92028 Sydnie Wauson 3839 Vista Campana S. Oceanside, CA. 92057 Laura Brubaker 3980 Torrey Hill Lane San Diego, CA. 92130 Sue Zois 3917 Caminito Del Mar Surf San Diego, CA. 92130 This business is conducted by an Unincorporated Associations-Other than a Partnership. First day of business 2/18/2010. /s/ Carol M. Myers, General Partner Filed with Ernest J. Dronenburg Jr., County Clerk/Recorder of San Diego on 11/21/2019 12/19, 12/26/2019, 01/02 & 01/09/2020
News for the Social Butterfly? Send your press releases to: email@example.com
NOTICE OF PUBLIC HEARING (City Council)
The San Marcos City Council will hold the following public hearing in the City Council Chambers located at the San Marcos City Hall, 1 Civic Center Drive, San Marcos, CA 92069; at 6:00 p.m. on Tuesday, January 14, 2020. Project No.: FEIR19-001, GPA18-0004, SP18-0003, SP18-0005, TSM18-0003, MFSDP18-0003, CUP180007, and GV18-0002 Applicant(s): KB Home Coastal Request: Request for 67 two and three bedroom multi-family condominium units, distributed in nine different buildings on a 3.7acre site, which would include 160 total parking spaces and common open space area for passive recreational use by residents. The project would be accessible via a new driveway located on Woodward Street and from an existing driveway connected with the neighboring Mission 316 East development off E. Mission Road. The project proposes a General Plan Amendment and Specific Plan Amendments to change the land use designation under the existing Heart of the City Specific Plan from Commercial to Multifamily Residential by adding the 3.7-acre site to the adjacent 8.98-acre Mission 316 Specific Planning Area. E n v i r o n m e n t a l D e t e r m i n a t i o n : Environmental Impact Report (FEIR19-001) (SCH#2019029038) was prepared pursuant to the California Environmental Quality Act (CEQA). Location of the Property: 260 East Mission Road (Northwest corner of Woodward Street and East Mission Road), more particularly described as Parcel A as shown on Lot Line Adjustment BA 07-213, as evidenced by document recorded February 29, 2008 as Instrument No. 200080107275 of official records, being more particularly described as follows: The southerly 233.00 feet of Lot 5, measured concentric to the northerly right-of-way of Mission Road thereof, In Block 52 of Rancho Los Vallecitos De San Marcos, in the City of San Marcos, County of San Diego, State of California, according to map thereof No. 806, filed in the Office of the County Recorder of San Diego County, December 21, 1895. Assessor’s Parcel Number: 220-210-50 Planning Commission Action: On November 18, 2019 the Planning Commission recommended approval of the proposed project to the City Council by a 7-0-0 vote. Further information about this notice can be obtained from Joseph Farace, Project Manager by calling 760-744-1050 extension 3248 or via email firstname.lastname@example.org. NOTICE: The hearing before the City Council is a de novo hearing and any correspondence submitted to the Planning Commission that you wish presented to the City Clerk must be resubmitted for the Council’s consideration. Contact the City Clerk for resubmittal of any correspondence and/or petition for/or against the project. The City of San Marcos is committed to making its programs, services and activities accessible to individuals with disabilities. If you require accommodation to participate in any City program, service or activity, please contact the City Clerk’s office at 1 Civic Center Drive, San Marcos, CA. 92069, or call 760-7441050, extension 3145. Phil Scollick, City Clerk, City of San Marcos. PD: 01/02/20.
Bahai A Way of Life
Baha’is have been described as a kind, gentle people. Would you like to know more? Call anyone listed here from your city/neighborhood.
www.bahai.org Baha’is Believe:
• all humanity was creat-
ed by one God and is part of one human race
• the purpose of life is to know and worship God,
to acquire virtues, to promote the oneness of humankind and to carry forward
• work performed in the
spirit of service is a form of worship
• the soul, created at the
moment of conception, is destined by God to reach
where it will continue to
progress until it attains the presence of God.
Be a guest of Bahai’s! Learn more about what we believe. Visit one of our meetings. Call a Baha’i in your city for more information!
Rancho Bernardo -
Chris or Azar Weixelman 1.858.759.8075 Escondido Sandy Coleman, 760-747-0049 San Marcos Gary L. Veale 760.304.6924
Vista Judy Maddox 1.760.598.7240 Celia Taghdiri 1.760.727.6264
Oceanside Dick or Patty Yant 1.619.985.9977 or 1.760.433.4447
The Paper • Page 16 • December 26, 2019