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Volume 5 Issue 5 March 7–20, 2014 Follow us on Facebook and Twitter




Photo Feature


Barbra Blake returns


Former head of Pride and AIDS Walk now leads GSDBA Hutton Marshall | GSD Assistant Editor

will be opening for — and singing with — the legendary Indigo Girls. The concert will act as a fundraiser for not only the SDWC, but also a new endowment project of the SDHDF, the Lesbian Health Initiative. Last spring the SDWC, who had received funding in years past from the foundation, approached them

Barbra Blake joined the Greater San Diego Business Association (GSDBA) last month as its executive director. After 16 years away from the community, many may not recognize the new leader of San Diego’s LGBT chamber of commerce, but she is largely responsible for the great success of both AIDS Walk and today’s San Diego LGBT Pride. Blake encountered the two groups in the late ‘80s: their early days when they were working to attract more volunteers and to make ends meet. Fresh out of UC San Diego with a degree in molecular biology, she became a devout volunteer in the community after being introduced by a friend to The LGBT Center and through it, to (then named) San Diego Gay and Lesbian Pride and AIDS Walk. It didn’t take long for her to become the executive director of both organizations. She simultaneously ran the two nonprofits on nights and weekends while spending her days doing lab research at Pharmacia, a pharmaceutical and biotech research company. “For both organizations, Pride and AIDS Walk, the office was the second bedroom in my house,” Blake said. “It was the days when we licked stamps, and it was all very grass roots.”

see WomensChorus, pg 12

see GSDBA, pg 2

South Bay Alliance expands

9 DINING (top) Some of the 100-member San Diego Women’s Chorus (Photo by Jonathan Cervantes); (right) The Indigo Girls (Photo by Jeremy Cowart)

‘Songs of Protest, Songs of Peace’ The waffle standard


San Diego Women’s Chorus joins forces with the Human Dignity Foundation and the Indigo Girls to raise money for a new local lesbian health initiative Morgan M. Hurley | GSD Editor

Share your wedding


Though it’s been around for decades, the San Diego Women’s Chorus (SDWC) admittedly has often struggled to make their mark in the community. They host two large concerts per year, one in spring and one near the holidays; their musical skills are often sought after for special events; and they generally play

whenever they are asked, but they have never been able to reach the same level of visibility, or success, of their male counterparts the San Diego Gay Men’s Chorus. Thanks to a recent opportunity given to them by the San Diego Human Dignity Foundation (SDHDF), that may finally change. On May 18, the SDWC will perform for the first time at the historic Balboa Theatre and they

Latino Film Fest to host ‘Cine Gay’ series

Ethan van Thillo empowers a community through film Monica Medina | GSD Reporter

The return of Mona

Index Opinion ..…………………6 News Briefs ..……………7 Foodie Flashes ...….…...8

Ethan van Thillo is a true dynamo. As the founder and executive director of the Media Arts Center San Diego, he works hard, sometimes into the wee hours of the morning, conjuring up new ideas on how he can make all that the center encompasses bigger and better. Yet at first glance, van Thillo strikes you not so much a go-getter, but as a man who seems happiest on the sidelines: unobtrusive and inconspicuous. Still, there’s no denying his success at the helm, running one of the largest Latino film festivals in the nation, which, since its inception 21 years ago, has drawn 200,000 attendees and screened over 3,000 films. Factoring in the Media Arts Center, which shows films year-round, and the relatively new Digital Gym, with its primary

focus on youth, the man is without a doubt, a powerhouse. “If I’m going to decide on doing something, I’m going to make it happen,” he said. “I have an internal drive and am constantly trying to bring in new innovations, which sometimes drives my staff mad, but I believe there has to be something next since I don’t feel like I’m ever going to say, ‘Okay, I’m done.’” Van Thillo’s drive extends to the Latino community, for which his hot-blooded passion runs deep. Though he is not of Hispanic origin, he credits his mother, Grace, for his belief in and concern for the community, despite growing up in San Clemente where he observed, “the power structure is very conservative.”

see LatinoFilm, pg 2

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van Thillo at the Digital Gym’s new theater (Photo by Ryan Kuratomi)



GAY SAN DIEGO March 7–20, 2014


GSDBA She wasted no time applying her scientific method to the business side of these organizations struggling to be noticed. Trial and error, identifying inefficiencies, and creative thinking helped grow AIDS Walk more than ten fold during her time there. Pride also underwent a pivotal change in its early history just a year after she began as executive director. At that time, Pride was held in the old Naval Hospital parking lot at Park Boulevard and Presidents Way. It was hot and hidden from the public eye, said Blake, so she worked with city leaders and Balboa Park museum owners, who agreed to let Pride use an undesirable, crime-ridden corner of the park known as Queen’s Circle. “I said ‘we’re gonna take it back and make it wonderful,’” Blake said. “You know what happened after that? Pride took off and exploded.” It was in those days that Blake, who grew up in a low-income Boston neighborhood where survival trumped all else, says she fell in love with the passion shown in the LGBT community through this non-profit work. “When you sit there the night before the Pride gates open, everything is set up, it’s two o’clock in the morning and we’re wiping dew off the signs because we don’t want them to wrinkle. You sit there and it’s quiet and it looks great and beautiful. It’s just this incredible feeling you have,” Blake recalled. Soon, the two organizations grew to the point where doing

Shown in her GSDBA office, Barbra Blake returns to the community after a 16-year break. (Photo by Hutton Marshall) both was no longer an option, Blake said. She chose AIDS Walk, and told Pharmacia that she would take a leave of absence for one year, which ended up being closer to seven. Professionally, AIDS Walk hit a little closer to home for Blake. At that time, she was doing research on Hepatitis and HIV treatment at Pharmacia. What she found in San Diego in the early ‘90s was a startling amount of misinformation and ignorance surrounding the disease. “AIDS was a four letter word and therefore was still seen as a gay disease,” Blake said. “So at the time, there was a resurgence, if you will, of the open discrimination of gays on the basis of the AIDS epidemic that was a curse of God and a real misunderstanding among most people of how the disease was spread and so forth.” With a mature, scientific approach to the disease, Blake was

able to provide practical advice to students, PTA boards and the San Diego community large. She said the new approach reached a much broader audience, which in turn attracted a new, diverse crowd to AIDS Walk. “Our AIDS Walk became one of the most, if not the most, diverse,” Blake said. “We had girl scouts at the finish line, as well as sororities, fraternities and African American churches.” However, after fostering such rapid growth at the nonprofits, Blake found herself itching to return to her scientific roots. She gave AIDS Walk a one-year notice, after which she returned to her alma mater. “I found myself writing chemical equations during board meetings, and I realized I had missed science,” Blake said. She took an associate director position at UC San Diego’s Center for Molecular Genetics, and bounced around to various administrative positions doing the “business of science.” Serving as dean for various colleges, she fostered partnerships between business, academia and government, eventually landing in the Rady School of Management, where she put her experience building business from the ground up to work assisting new entrepreneurs. After a vibrant 15-year career at UC San Diego, Blake decided to step down and focus on her PhD, which focused on entrepreneurial leadership and motivation. That’s when she got an unexpected call from a friend mentioning that the GSDBA was on the lookout for a new executive director. With ample experience fostering young businesses and working in the LGBT community, Blake soon realized the job couldn’t be a better fit. “When I look back to the time when I could work 14 hours and have a smile on my face at the end of the day, it was when I was working in the community,” Blake said. Now, at the helm of one of the GSDBA, one of the oldest and most well established of its kind, she’s wasting no time doing what she does best: changing things for the better. “It’s time for a reorganization of GSDBA,” Blake said. “It’s time to take a hard look at how we serve our members and what it is they need. I believe it’s a turning point for GSDBA right now.” Blake said she’s currently getting feedback from the board of directors, its various committees, and the members that make up the organization, finding out the direction they envision for the chamber. A survey conducted shortly before Blake stepped in showed that 90 percent of members heard about the chamber through word of mouth. Using online tools to expand their reach is vital to ensuring the GSDBA is living by the first three words of its name “greater San Diego,” said Blake. “There’s a wonderful safe little area — Hillcrest and Mission Hills — but there’s LGBT-owned businesses in other parts of San Diego that may not feel so safe,” Blake said. “How do we get out there, not how do they get here, so that’s a big challenge that we see. We need to leave this safe little place we have here and go out there.” Regarding the focus on supporting small businesses being at odds with fostering large corporate partnerships, Blake said the two build off each other. Not only do these large companies enable GSDBA to put on programs that better benefit small businesses, their knowledge is of great value as well. “These larger corporations have a tremendous amount of experience and they can come in and mentor and advise,” Blake said. The last goal she mentioned was creating a strong mentor program for young LGBT entrepreneurs — a special breed she called “the perfect storm” for starting a business. “Gay people, we’ve taken risks,” she said. “Our whole life, we’ve taken risks. By virtue of being an LGBT person, you’re a risk taker and so are entrepreneurs.” Overall, Blake said she couldn’t be happier about her new role in the community, but she still remains hopeful that one day, this job won’t be needed. “Some day we wont need these specialty business chambers,” Bake said. “We still need it, it’s still necessary. We’ve come a long way but we’re still not there yet.”t


LATINOFILM “I grew up immersed in the Latino community because of my mom, a bilingual school teacher,” he explained. “My father, originally from Belgium, was a silk screen printer, but it was my mother who I’d go with to visit her students. I’d also travel to Mexico with friends and their families. Growing up in San Clemente and seeing the negative stereotypes of Latinos, and then traveling to Mexico, was a real eye-opener. It allowed me to see people for who they are.” It was this interest that led him to major in Latin American studies at UC Santa Cruz. With no clear career goals, except a feeling that he wanted to do community work, it was by chance that van Thillo found his path through film. ”I had this professor, Armando Valdez, who grew up in the Chicano movement,” van Thillo recalled. “He said, ‘Let’s organize a Chicano Film Festival as part of our class final project.’ I naively volunteered to do it and learned basically everything about the festival biz — how to find films, write proposals, make posters.” Film was not van Thillo’s focus back then. He loved music more than film, having mastered the violin, and formed a Cumbia band for which he played the guitar. But he distinctly remembers two movies from his youth that changed the way he looked at life, “Amadeus” and “Koyaanisqatsi.” Perhaps in recognizing the power of film, the class assignment grew into something more for van Thillo. “Being the driven, crazy person that I am, after it was done, I said to myself, I can’t do this just once,” van Thillo declared. “So I did it on my own for another two years while still in school.” During this time, he met his partner and fellow student Mary Reed. Together they moved to San Diego, and now have two sons, ages 10 and 14. The young couple’s early days in San Diego shaped their aspirations for community involvement. “Mary was going to go to UCSD to get her teacher credential. I was working for the San Diego County of Education Migrant Education Program. My job was to knock on doors of families we thought might be migrant families. I’d tell them about the services, but they couldn’t qualify for the program unless I knew they’d worked in the fields. I would hear their whole story, and that really helped me by giving me the ability to just talk to people.” Eventually, van Thillo started up a student film festival, Cinema Estudiantil, in San Diego partnered with the Voz Fronteriza, a UCSD Chicano student newspaper, and SDSU’s student government. Then in 1997, he scored his first celebrity for the festival, actor Edward James Olmos. “That blew me away,” remembered van Thillo. “The house was packed and I woke up to the fact that people want to see celebrities. The next year we moved the festival off campus to Horton Plaza and started charging. That’s when the corporate world woke up to it, and I dropped the name, Cinema Estudiantil, and it became the Latino Film Festival.” As the festival grew, van Thillo made the decision to offer yearround programs, partnering with the San Diego Public Library. “We decided we needed a

see LatinoFilm, pg 3


GAY SAN DIEGO March 7–20, 2014

The Digital Gym's lobby and lounge area (Courtesy Media Arts Center) FROM PAGE 1

LATINOFILM nonprofit to run our programs,” he says. “So we called ourselves the Media Arts Center and modeled ourselves after media arts centers across the country, adding the youth component, and workshops for adults and kids.” Not one to rest on his laurels, van Thillo is always on the prowl for the next big thing. “I want to keep growing,” he

said. “It’s a little bit about entertainment, but I also want to keep focusing on education, careers in the film industry and other creative careers, too. We’re always going to screen films, but you’re going to see the festival move a little more into expos and panel discussions and trying to beef that up.” Van Thillo would also like to see the Digital Gym become a model for other neighborhoods, with storefronts one day in San Ysidro, Chula Vista and Escondido. “My number one priority is to be constantly committed to the

community and keeping the focus on why we’re ultimately here,” van Thillo said. “I always use the tag line, ‘Changing lives through film.’ Whether it’s exhibiting films or providing the tools to make your own films and videos to tell your stories, when you pick a film you’re looking for that connection through culture and identity, family and community … I hope people feel that. I hope it’s felt 100 percent because that’s what it’s all about.” The Latino Film Festival runs March 13 – 23. For more information, visit

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Latino Film Festival’s CINE GAY SHOWCASE co-presented by FilmOut San Diego

With the 9th annual Cine Gay Showcase, San Diego Latino Film Festival furthers its mission to correct the often distorted and cliche images seen on television and movies by revealing LGBT lives and experiences through dynamic films and documentaries.

For more info or to watch trailers, visit

UltraStar M ission Valley Cinemas, 7510 Hazard Center Dr., #100 March 15 @ 12:30 p.m. Full feature 90 min Margarita Canada, 2012, drama

Margarita works as a live-in maid for power couple Ben and Gail and their teenage daughter Mali. She’s dating a beautiful female medical student and is happy taking the lead on the family’s domestic routine. This all changes when a series of bad investments threaten to bankrupt the family permanently. To cut costs, Ben and Gail fire Margarita, an action that completely uproots all sense of cohesion in the household.

March 15 @ 8 p.m. Full feature 94 min La Partida Cuba, 2013, sports, drama

Two Cuban men on the edge of marginality fight to lead a life together. But it’s hard for both: one has to work aso he can pay off his fatherin-law’s debts. The other prostitutes himself in the streets to fulfill his family’s duties... In an island where baseball was the king, soccer seems to be the only way to escape.

March 16 @ 5:30 p.m. Full feature 90 min Margarita Canada, 2012, drama

Margarita works as a live-in maid for power couple Ben and Gail and their teenage daughter Mali. She’s dating a beautiful female medical student and is happy taking the lead on the family’s domestic routine. This all changes when a series of bad investments threaten to bankrupt the family permanently. To cut costs, Ben and Gail fire Margarita, an

action that completely uproots all sense of cohesion in the household.

March 16 @ 7:30 p.m. Full feature 92 min Quebranto Mexico, 2013, documentary

An unforgettable portrait of a mother and son. Doña Lilia Ortega is an actress who lives with her son, Fernando, once a famous child actor who came out as a transvestite and now calls herself, Coral Bonelli.

March 18 @ 5:30 p.m. Full feature La Partida | 94 min Cuba, 2013, sports, drama

Two Cuban men on the edge of marginality fight to lead a life together. But it’s hard for both: one has to work aso he can pay off his fatherin-law’s debts. The other prostitutes himself in the streets to fulfill his family’s duties... In an island where baseball was the king, soccer seems to be the only way to escape.

March 19 @ 5 p.m. Full feature Yo, Indocumentada | 61 min Venezuala, 2013, documentary Tamara, Desiree, and Victoria are all Venezuelan women from different walks of life. On first glance, this lawyer, stylist, and art student have very little in common. However, each carries an identification card that bears a different name. Each is a transsexual woman who have changed their gender.

March 21 @ 6 p.m. — Cine Gay Shorts You’re Dead to Me | 13 min U.S., 2013, drama

Andrea, a grieving Chicana mother, confronts an uninvited family before her Día de los Muertos celebration. By night’s end, death offers her a

choice that she couldn’t make in life.

O Pacote | 19 min Brazil, 2013, drama

The rapidly developing relationship between two teenagers living in San Paolo comes to a halt after the realization one of them is HIV+. Together, they must decide whether or not the stigma associated with this result will keep them apart.

O Ser Un Elefante | 8 min Mexico, 2013, drama

After the death of his longtime lover, a man becomes obsessed with the personality of elephants, who they say, never forget.

Carreteras | 10 min Mexico, 2013, drama

Carmela, a young shopkeeper, leads a serene life in the Mexican countryside. Her world is flipped upside down with the arrival of Abril, a vibrant and intrepid force of nature. Carmela must make the decision between keeping her quotidian life intact or pursuing an adventure into the unknown with Abril.

Alex y Fabio Ya No Estan 18 min Puerto Rico, 2013, drama

Alex and Fabio’s intricate relationship is examined through a series of flashbacks, highlighting their initial insatiable desire for one another to the inopportune turn of events that led to the dismantling of their relationship. What results is not only an examination of a broken relationship, but an honest portrayal of modern love and its oftentimes fleeting nature.

Bajo El Ultimo Techo | 12 min Mexico, 2013, drama see CINE GAY SHOWCASE, pg 4

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GAY SAN DIEGO March 7–20, 2014


Am I married to a sex addict?

MICHAEL KIMMEL LIFE BEYOND THERAPY Dear Michael, My partner and I have been together for about three years now. At the beginning the sex was great, now it’s almost nonexistent, but we still love each other very much. A while back we started having three-ways with other guys. That was cool, but, in the last few months, he told me he’s not into those anymore and wants to have an open relationship where each of us does our own thing sexually. This isn’t my preference, but I went along with it (I’m not very assertive). Now he’s never home; when he’s not at work, he’s almost always out having sex. On weekends, he’s on the computer for three to four hours a day looking to hook up. It feels like our relationship is falling apart. Am I married to a sex addict? —Unloved and unlaid in Little Italy Dear U & U, I get a lot of questions about sex addic-

tion. Unfortunately, it is an increasingly popular topic. Your letter mentions several problems: It’s hard for you to be assertive, your boyfriend’s having sex with other people and you’re not thrilled about it, your relationship feels like it’s falling apart and you wonder if you’re married to a sex addict. Does your partner have a sex addiction? I define sex addiction as sexual behavior that habitually interferes with a person’s well being. Any sexual activity that “runs” us can be an addiction. Does your partner’s desire for sex interfere with the health of your relationship? It’s not sex outside of a relationship that is destructive, it’s WHY the person is having sex with (so many) other people. If the two of you are happy with non-overlapping sex lives, then great, but it sounds like you’re not. With the easy availability of internet sex and hook-up sites, many a man and woman have be tempted away from their partners. And, you may ask, why not? If you’re horny and alone and your lover’s asleep so early (again) or at work, is there harm to getting off over the internet? Look at your motivation and the frequency of the behavior; if your boyfriend can’t ignore the desire for sex and feels like his genitals are telling him what to do (and not vice versa), then he may have a sex addiction. Here are some questions to ask him: • Can you turn down sex or do you have it any time you can get it? • Do you spend large amounts of time looking for sex? • Do you panic when you think that you may not have sex today/tonight? • Do you put yourself at risk as a result of your sexual activities? • Does your sex life interfere with your job, relationship, or being with friends? • How do you approach your partner if

you think he or she has a sex addiction? Very gingerly. Imagine that your roles were reversed and he was confronting you with upsetting behavior. How would you like to be approached? What would turn you off or make you defensive? The same is probably true for him. If you are going to talk with him, be honest, loving and respectful. Tell him your concerns about him, you and your relationship. If your boyfriend is willing, he might consider group and/or individual therapy to help him regain control of his sex life. He can Google “sex addiction” and choose from a lot of options, or find out about local meetings of “Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous” at SLAA uses a 12-step model to help people who have sex addictions. Their meetings are free and visitors or guests are not allowed. You said it’s hard for you to be assertive. Whether your boyfriend has a sex addiction or not, find a way to talk with him about your sex life. Be assertive: tell him what you would like. See if the two of you can find mutual satisfaction and keep your relationship from “falling apart” (your words). Whether you’re married to a sex addict or not, it sounds like your relationship needs a tune-up. Either talk it out yourself or get support from friends or a mental health professional. If your relationship is worth working for, take action. —Michael Kimmel is a licensed psychotherapist who specializes in helping LGBT clients achieve their goals and deal with anxiety, depression, grief, sexually addictive behavior, coming out, relationship challenges and homophobia. Michael is currently accepting new clients. Contact him at 619-9553311 or visit FROM PAGE 3

CINE GAY SHOWCASE Beto, an imaginative and precocious 9 year-old, feels creatively stifled by his overbearing grandparents who act as his guardians. He finds an outlet through a friendship he forms with Stephany, his transgender neighbor, who helps him see the world in unexpected ways.

Digital Gym Cinema, 2921 El Cajon Blvd., North Park March 16 @ 1 p.m. | Full feature 61 min Yo, Indocumentada Venezuela, 2013, documentary

Tamara, Desiree, and Victoria are all Venezuelan women from different walks of life. On first glance, this lawyer, stylist, and art student have very little in common. However, each carries an identification card that bears a different name. Each is a transsexual woman who have changed their gender.

March 18 @ 6:15 p.m. Full feature 90 min Margarita | Canada, 2012, drama

Margarita works as a live-in maid for power couple Ben and Gail and their teenage daughter Mali. She’s dating a beautiful female medical student and is happy taking the lead on the family’s domestic routine. This all changes when a series of bad investments threaten to bankrupt the family permanently. To cut costs, Ben and Gail fire Margarita, an action that completely uproots all sense of cohesion in the household.

March 22 @ 3:15 p.m. Full feature 92 min Quebranto | Mexico, 2013, documentary An unforgettable portrait of a mother and son. Doña Lilia Ortega is an actress who lives with her son, Fernando, once a famous child actor who came out as a transvestite and now calls herself, Coral Bonelli.t


GAY SAN DIEGO March 7–20, 2014


Expanding our mission DA E E L L I OT T SOUTH BAY ALLIANCE South Bay Alliance (SBA) had their first mixer fundraiser of the year on Feb. 20, “Cocktails and Critters” at Celebration Hall in Imperial Beach. The event raised funds for both South Bay Pride Art & Music Festival and Living Coast Discovery Center. The event was sponsored by Tracy Rivera – State Farm Agent, McFarlane Promotions, Celebration Hall, and Melanie Peters Productions, with fantastic music by SongStruck San Diego. Everyone enjoyed great food, prizes, people, and entertainment. The Living Coast Discovery Center even brought along two beautiful owls. More than 85 people attended the event, making it a great success

and fantastic networking opportunity. At the mixer, South Bay Pride Art & Music Festival was presented with a check for $2,000 from San Diego Pride. Our new executive director, Joe Burke, accepted the check from Pride representative Gloria Cruz Isso. San Diego Pride has been instrumental in supporting our smaller local Pride celebrations. We are grateful for the wonderful work they do throughout the county and their ongoing support of our Pride celebration. With the success of the last two business mixers and in response to the many that have expressed an interest in developing this business outreach and networking in south San Diego County, the SBA board is going to do just that! SBA had always planned to develop this part of their mission more, but the opportunity and interest didn’t seem to come together. Now it has and so we are proud to announce that this spring we will be creating a business membership LGBT chamber of commerce serving the South Bay area. We will continue to work closely with our friends and supporters at GSDBA around events that are of interest to the whole county, but also fill the needs of our own community business networking opportunities in our own backyard. Board members Sue Sneeringer, Craig Knudson and Scott Styler will be heading up this new venture. Over the next few months, South Bay Alliance will be develop-

ing a specific board focused on the planning and development of this division of South Bay Alliance. If you live or work in the South Bay area and would like to be part of making this happen, please contact us at SouthBayAlliance@ We are also looking for businesses that are interested in hosting mixers and sponsoring this outreach throughout South Bay. The South Bay Alliance is extremely excited that we are able to expand even sooner than we had planned! As for South Bay Pride, we continue to plan for an even larger event on Sept.13 at Bayfront Park. Joe Burke is already busy planning multiple stages, an expansion of our children’s area activities, as well as the addition of water sports to take advantage of our bay front location. We are also still looking for a volunteer director to coordinate training of our volunteers for the day of the festival and to manage the volunteers during the event. South Bay Alliance is an allvolunteer organization and our Pride celebration is a great way to give back to our community. If you are interested in this, please email us at with your resume. This is a nonpaid position. Finally, we are privileged to announce that McFarlane Promotions will once again head up the logistics and organization of the South Bay Pride. Their expertise, insights

South Bay Pride executive director Joe Burke (left) receives a check from San Diego Pride representative Gloria Cruz Isso. (Courtesy South Bay Alliance) and exceptional organizational skills were instrumental in growing South Bay Pride Art and Music Festival this past year and we look forward to another wonderful event with them at the helm. I am so proud of the board this year. They are an amazing group of people and it is a privilege to work with them. Thank you so much for being who you are! And of course, if you would like to donate to South Bay Pride, please go to our webpage Remember, every little bit helps.

— Dae Elliott is a sociologist and lecturer working at SDSU since 1994. She is one of the founding executive committee members and current chair of South Bay Alliance, a 501(c)3 nonprofit organized in 2006 with the purpose of building a coalition of the LGBT community and allies for social networking, business promotion and political awareness in South San Diego County. South Bay Alliance has been the organizer of South Bay Pride Art & Music Festival since 2007. Contact her at



GAY SAN DIEGO March 7–20, 2014

Letters Raising Arizona

Editorial Editor’s Commentary regarding the message below addressed to us “homoelectives”: Many of you may be shocked and even infuriated that I chose to publish the following Op-Ed piece. Let me explain. When I first received this missive via email, which was identified in the subject line as “Homosexual Civil Rights is an oxymoron: an op-ed/letter to the editor for publication,” I read the first line and was happy to see that someone wrote to counter the ridiculous position Arizona almost put itself in last week. I had more than one extended debate — in person and most notably on Facebook — over the proposed and subsequently passed law that a pressured governor finally vetoed. However,

when I read the second sentence and saw the word “homoelectives,” I realized it was not going to be good. At first I was angry at his ignorance, but then I decided it really did need to be shared with all of you. For much of the same reason the New York Times chose to publish a very “anti-American” opinion piece supposedly penned by Vladimir Putin last September, I have decided to publish this “anti-gay” piece. Although The Times’ editorial page editor Andrew Rosenthal thought the Putin piece was “well-written and well-argued,” that was where his allegiance to the piece ended. “I don’t agree with many of the points in it, but that is irrelevant,” he said.

‘Homosexual Civil Rights’ is an oxymoron What happened to religious liberty and a church or business reserved right to “refuse service to anyone”? Businesses that refuse service to homoelectives, even on religious grounds, are being sued successfully in some states for door-closing amounts of money by homoelectives that, by definition, do not qualify for minority class protection from discrimination; as homosexual sex is non-compulsory in that one can choose to abstain from sexual relations just as one can choose what kind of sex to engage in and with whom or what within the law (children should never be an option although pedophilia is next on the ACLU list for sexual orientation normalization). On a recent trip to Houston, my wife used a hotel restaurant women’s restroom. She was shocked to see a urinal in there. The way things are going, I imagine a business owner will soon be sued for not plumbing a urinal in the ladies room!  The LGBT (Love Gone Bad Today) think Transgenders and Transsexuals are wildcards from Transyltopsyturvia that legitimize their cause with even more confusion. Transgenders and Transsexuals are just homoelectives that have taken their homosexuality to the next level of perversion (sinful inequality). “Homosexual Civil Rights” is an oxymoron. It is morally wrong to give PUBLISHER David Mannis (619) 961-1951


EDITOR Morgan M. Hurley (619) 961-1960

ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Sloan Gomez (619) 961-1954

ASSISTANT EDITOR Hutton Marshall (619) 961-1952

Jerry Kulpa (619) 961-1964

ART DIRECTOR Rebecah Corbin (619) 961-1961 PRODUCTION ASSISTANT Vincent Meehan (619) 961-1961

Mike Rosensteel (619) 961-1958

Lisa Peterson (619) 961-1956 Yana Shayne (619) 961-1963

Indeed. I don’t have to agree with any of the opinion pieces I publish, either, and this one, though similar in ilk — containing “undeniable hypocrisy and even moments of dishonesty” as the Washington Posts’ Max Fischer said of Putin’s piece — I felt if this guy took the time and effort to write and send something like this out to the LGBT media and then was bold enough to add his name and contact information at the end, I’ll take him up on it. So go ahead and read the following opinion piece, either objectively or subjectively, and then if you happen to be righteously provoked enough to write or email or even call Mr. Jarvis, please let us know that you did. —Editor

legal rights or discrimination protection to those that choose to practice homosexual sex for a multitude of reasons that are consistent with the Constitution of the United States of America and the preservation of it, and in turn, our country. Like a drivers license, a marriage license is a privilege, not a right under the 14th Amendment. Some restrictions apply in all states such as age, blood health and type compatibility, relative consanguinity, number of spouses and gender of prospective spouses and their mental competency. As recently as 1986 homosexuality was regarded as a mental disorder by the American Psychiatric Association. For all are subject to the Law of the Harvest; reaping what is sewn, and homosexuals sew their seed in stony ground. California farmers and ranchers know what I’m talking about. Abraham Lincoln warned us that: “As a nation of free men, we must live through all time, or die by suicide.” Before supporting legal rights or discrimination protection for homoelectives, one should ask him or herself two questions: Was I better off before homosexuals became “gay” and prideful?; and: Can I afford another year of gay pride? I think everyone should have an emblazoned “Love Gone Bad Today” t-shirt in their closet where homoelectives should be. Sincerely, Michael W. Jarvis —Michael W. Jarvis can be reached at P.O. Box 356, Salt Lake City, Utah 84110, by phone at 801-706-2740, or by email at

SALES & MARKETING INTERNS Melinda Baron Hillary Hudson Michael Kean Moises Romero

ACCOUNTING Priscilla Umel-Martinez (619) 961-1962 CONTRIBUTORS

Blake Beckcom Gwen Beckcom Dae Elliott Michael Kimmel Monica Medina Jeff Praught Caleb Rainey Frank Sabatini Jr.

WEB DESIGN Kim Espinoza

OPINIONS/LETTERS Gay San Diego encourages letters to the editor and guest editorials. Please email both to Include phone number and address for verification. We reserve the right to edit letters and editorials for brevity and accuracy. Letters should be no longer than 350 words in length unless approved by staff editors. Letters and guest editorials do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher or staff. SUBMISSIONS/NEWS TIPS Press releases and story ideas are welcome. Send press releases, tips, photos or story ideas to For breaking news and investigative story ideas contact the editor by phone or email. DISTRIBUTION GAY San Diego is distributed free, biweekly, every other Friday. COPYRIGHT 2013. All rights are reserved.

The planned “Gay Days” May 8–12 in Arizona strikes me as a brain-dead venture [See “Five days of gay” Vol. 5, Issue 4]. Why would any rational gay man or woman consider going to a state where pending legislation would allow businesses to flagrantly deny services to gay persons?  Want a cab to your hotel? “Sorry, but my religious beliefs don’t allow me to accept you as a customer.” Experiencing severe chest pain? “Sorry, I cannot treat you. My religion considers you to be an abomination.” Want to check into your hotel? “We cannot honor your reservation. Go away!” Why set foot in this state at a time when, as a consequence of local policies, many smart business and professional organizations are cancelling plans for meetings and conventions there? Maybe it makes sense to support the Arizona gay community by going to Phoenix for the “Gay Days” event. As for me, all I say is “Include me out.”  I’ll spend my dollars in California. —Ed Hansen, San Diego, via email

The burning of Rome Max, thanks for a really great article [See “The Vatican: power and the pursuit of happiness,” Vol. 5, Issue 4]. I have never read such a great description of how the Vatican works and its influence in Italian LGBT life. Many thanks for enlightening me. As someone who has spent a fair amount of time in Italy — and loves it — your column was very insightful. Keep up the good work! Peace and fire, —Michael Kimmel, a fellow GSD writer, via email

Voices of North Park I saw your article about the [Ray Street Artists] group in Uptown News and commented to Patric [Stillman] that it was very well done [See “The ‘visual voices’ of North Park” Vol. 5, Issue 4]. Just wanted to pass on the comment to you. Same goes for this piece. —Dawn Kureshy via gay-sd.comt

3737 Fifth Ave. Suite 201 San Diego, CA 92103 (619) 519-7775

Business Improvement Association


GAY NEWS BRIEFS COMEDY FUNDRAISER FOR GLSEN A “fun”raiser for the San Diego Chapter of the Gay, Lesbian, Straight Education Network (GLSEN) will take place at Diversionary Theatre on Sunday March 9. The evening starts at 7:30 p.m. with a wine and cheese reception followed by a night of stand-up comedy beginning at 8 p.m. Host for the evening is GLSEN San Diego Chapter Co-Chair Chet Sewell, a comedian himself. Other performers include Sarah Burford, Tony Calabrese, Chris Clobber, Al Gavi, Steve Heyl, and Diane Jean. All proceeds go to area high school Gay Straight Alliances (GSA), GLSEN San Diego’s Jump-Start Youth Leadership Team, training K-12 teachers, staff and administrators on ways to create safe schools for all students, and providing schools with inclusive curriculum. Diversionary Theatre is located at 4545 Park Blvd. For more info visit FREE ‘TRANSMEDIA EXPERIENCE’ COMES TO NORMAL HEIGHTS San Diegans will have the opportunity to watch collaborative art manifest before their eyes on Saturday, March 22, where a festival looking at “art as a process and dialogue” will take place. TRANSANNUAL: Normal Actions for Normal Heights will span from 32nd to 34th streets along Adams Avenue. It will start as a blank slate, and throughout the day, eight core artists and a team of assistant collaborators will spend the day “creating/dissolving, installing/de-installing, and performing” from 4 to 10 p.m. The event deliberately veers from popular art fairs that treat art as a business, seeking instead to create a unique, free experience for visitors to witness. Participating artists are Tony Allard, Kim Garcia, Jason Gould, John Paul Labno, Noe Olivas, Brett Phelps and robyko. For more information visit facebook. com/transannual or email

CITY COUNCIL PASSES FOOD TRUCK ORDINANCE On March 3, the City Council approved a new ordinance outlining zoning rules for food trucks operating within the city. The new regulations limit the hours food trucks may operate in residential areas to 6 a.m. to 10 p.m. Sunday through Thursday, and until 11 p.m. on Fridays and Saturdays. It also requires private property owners to obtain an over-the-counter permit in order to host food trucks. San Diego CityBeat reported that the permit is estimated to cost $935 for the first year and $132 to renew. Permits are not required for food trucks, property owners in industrial areas, or at schools, hospitals, religious facilities and construction sites. Many food truck owners have criticized the ordinance as a ban from hightraffic areas where they do the most business, but city officials claim the regulations are necessary for public safety. City Council will review the policy in one year. RAIL CLOSINGS DURING NEXT TWO WEEKENDS The North County Transit District announced it will suspend select rail service on the weekends of March 8 – 9 and March 15 – 16 for SANDAG construction projects in North County, which affect transit from San Diego to Los Angeles. On the weekend of March 8, there will be no Amtrak or Metrolink service out of Downtown San Diego, Old Town or Solana Beach. On the weekend of March 15, COASTER service, as well as Amtrak, Metrolink and BNSF freight service will close. The transit district recommends MTS bus routes as alternatives to shuttle passengers to Irvine station, where Amtrak will offers service to points north including Union Station in Los Angeles. Passengers with a valid Metrolink fair may ride BREEZE 395 in North County for free during both weekends. For more information, call 800-872-7245 or visit MISS GAY GOLDEN STATE PAGEANT COMES TO NORTH PARK USofA pageants will take over the Lafayette Hotel’s Mississippi Ballroom on Sunday, March 16 to host

the inaugural Miss Gay Golden State USofA pageant. Showcasing contestants and entertainers from every end of the LGBT community, the pageant is open to male drag queens and transsexual female impersonators over the age of 21, who will compete in evening gown, personal interview and talent. The entertainment will include special performances from gay male performers, male impersonators, transgendered females and drag queen titleholders. The prize package for Miss Gay Golden State USofA is a crown, s sash and more than $4,000 in cash and prizes, and the winner and first alternate will compete at the national Miss Gay USofA pageant in Dallas in May. To purchase tickets, visit For more information, visit facebook. com/goldenstateusofa.

see Briefs, pg 17

GAY SAN DIEGO March 7–20, 2014



GAY SAN DIEGO March 7–20, 2014


BY FRANK SABATINI JR. After a short run, French Concession at 3671 Fifth Ave. has closed. Owner Alex Thao, who recently transformed Celadon into the dim sum restaurant, says a rent hike prompted him to pull out. He has since opened another dim sum house in the Gaslamp District called Lucky Liu’s: 332 J St., 619-255-5487. Everything from braised octopus and grass-fed brisket to roasted tofu and cauliflower “steaks” can be found at the new JUKE, a small farm-to-table café hidden in the back of Bottlecraft in North Park. Launched by Juan Miron and Kevin Ho, the foodie entrepreneurs semi-retired their MIHO Gastrotruck in lieu of an actual address. Their culinary concept remains the same with a “neo-traditional” menu highlighting international street foods. Seating is limited to a couple of communal tables outside the store. 3007 University Ave., 619-501-1177.

Chef Miguel Valdez is the new executive chef at 100 Wines in Hillcrest (Courtesy Cohn Restaurant Group)

From an agricultural research assistant at Washington State University to a dough tosser in Little Italy, San Diego native Miguel Valdez has become the new executive chef at 100 Wines in Hillcrest after helming the kitchen at The Red Door in Mission Hills and working at the former Anthology. He’s refreshed the menu, adding more than a dozen dishes that reveal California twists on Mediterranean-style fare. 1027 University Ave., 619-491-0100. What gets wetter and wetter as it dries? The riddle is among numerous questions you might hear tossed out from 7 to 9 p.m. on Tuesdays at Wine Steals in Hillcrest during its newly introduced trivia nights. The games, led by former employee and London native Justin McIntyre, feature six rounds each in various subject categories. Participants enter for free with a chance of winning Wine Steals gift cards valued at $20 for first place, $15 for second and $10 for third. In regards to the question above, the answer is “a towel.” 1243 University Ave., 619-295-1188.

Up in North County, in the Torrey Highlands Village Center, comes the first kitchen in San Diego County specializing in exotic cuisine from southeastern Africa. The 3,000-square foot restaurant, Peri Peri, reflects the namesake chili pepper indigenous to Mozambique, and it shows up in signature plates incorporating chicken or shellfish. The menu also features meat skewers, curries and vegan-friendly dishes. 7845 Highland Village Place, #C101, 858-538-2282.

The smoked marlin tacos and fish stew made famous by Oscar’s Mexican Seafood in north Pacific Beach have arrived to Hillcrest. The eatery opened an additional location on Feb. 22 in place of Tiki Taka Grill next door to Uncle Biff ’s Killer Cookies. Red meat is a footnote on the menu, which primarily focuses on shrimp, scallops and marlin appearing in tacos, tortas, ceviche and stew. There are also zesty house-made sauces presented in squirt bottles that include creamy chipotle. Get there between 2:30 and 5:30 p.m. Monday through Thursday, and the regular fish tacos made with mahi are only 99 cents. 646 University Ave., 619-798-3550.t

Smoked marlin and spicy shrimp tacos at Oscars Mexican Seafood (Photo by Frank Sabatini Jr.)


Dining with

GAY SAN DIEGO March 7–20, 2014


(left) Malted waffles from an old-time recipe; (right) The strawberry malted waffle; (below) “Phoenix Flame thrower” chicken sandwich (Photo by Frank Sabatini Jr.)


t more than 20 years old, The Waffle Spot in Hotel Circle remains a campy offshoot to the dusky, 60s-era lobby of The Kings Inn Hotel. Patrons are greeted at the entrance by a cartoonish effigy of Sir Wafflelot, the eatery’s mascot that appears also in a medieval, Teletubby-like landscape captured on a gigantic mural inside. With a classic lunch counter in front of it and modern80s fabrics accenting the booths and stool backs, everything about the place is weird and refreshingly anti-trendy. The waffles (and pancakes) have long been acclaimed as San Diego’s best because they’re made with malted flour shipped in from Carbon’s in Michigan, which developed the mix in 1937. The malts bestow rise and sweetness while the addition of cornmeal in the recipe contributes heartiness. But given their airiness, the waffles cool down faster than most, especially the mini ones included with breakfast plates. Until about a decade ago, it wasn’t unusual to see The Waffle Spot advertised in LGBT publications throughout the region. Perhaps management trimmed the marketing budget or simply lost its connection to the community. Nowadays, you have to dig deep on gay web sites like pinkchoice. com and to find the hotel and restaurant mentioned in a handful of reviews. Most are positive. My recent drop-in attested to the diversity of customers I remember from years back. A booth to my left was crammed with a posse of gay men visiting from Las Vegas. A little eavesdropping confirmed they had navigated the Hillcrest bar circuit the night before. To my right was a hipster couple guiding their adorable tot through a crayon ses-

sion of Sir Wafflelot pictured on her placemat. In a booth next to inces them were two preppy guys incessantly thumbing their cell phones and never looking up until their dramatic waffle sundaes arrived. On this late morning, I augmented corn beef hash and eggs with a full-size strawberry waffle measuring about four inches in diameter. The pre-frozen berries were juicy, not overly cloying. And the waffle was light and crispy. Cherries were my first choice, but the waitress had informed me there was a recall on them, urging me in a motherly tone to dispose of any cherry pie filling I might have in my cupboards. Obviously the fruit in this case normally comes from a can. So does the hash. But I really didn’t mind. Although in terms of quantity it fell short by a few ounces. Conversely, the steamy hash browns on the plate were abundant, tasty on their own and even better after splattering them with bottled hot sauce from the table. I returned a week later intent on trying one of the breakfast casseroles, available in vegetarian or meat options, like the super-loaded “farmer’s” version with ham, sausage and bacon. But the “Phoenix flame thrower” sandwich from the lunch card called instead — and I’m glad it did. I normally find chicken sandwiches boring. This, however, was surprisingly exceptional. It’s constructed with a thick, blackened chicken breast that’s flame-broiled, plus sharp cheddar cheese and a crisscross of smoky bacon. The accompanying chipotle mayo was the clincher. It was spicier than expected, revealing bits of fiery red peppers as I spread it across the buttered bun. The “sandwich billboard” is available only from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m., Monday through Friday, because the grill becomes too crowded with breakfast orders on weekends. Other choices include

New York deli-style roast beef, an Albuquerque-style turkey melt with Ortega chilies, various burgers and the “Chula Vista chicken Caesar wrap” contained in a flour tortilla, which was added to the menu a couple years ago by an employee from South Bay. When inquiring about the light construction occurring on the property’s exterior, the waitress said the hotel’s lobby and possibly The Waffle Spot might also get a redo. If the latter materializes, she assured “they won’t get rid of the corniness that people have come to love here.” So true, and I sure hope they don’t.t

The Waffle Spot 133 Hotel Circle South (Hotel Circle)


Prices: Breakfast, $4.75 to $12.50; lunch, $5.75 to $8.75



GAY SAN DIEGO March 7–20, 2014

hotels | rings | tuxedo & dress rentals | reception venues | photographers | florists | cakes | honeymoons

Wedding Announcements: GARWOOD


Surrounded by dozens of well wishers, Uptown community activists Ann M. Garwood and Nancy A. Moors joined their hands in marriage on Oct. 20 at 1 p.m. at their home The Meadows on Maple Canyon in Bankers Hill. Standing up for the couple was Mike Wright and Nancy’s son Dustin Moors, with longtime friend Susan Fosselman officiating the loving ceremony. The 90-year-old mothers of both brides were also in attendance, as were six of their nine grandchildren. Lots of champagne and a

three-layer cake immediately followed the wedding, with music and dancing throughout the afternoon provided by Laura Jane Willcock with a personalized song-list provided by the brides. “Lots of bubbles, happy people, laughter and conversation made the day perfect,” the brides said.

GAY SAN DIEGO March 7–20, 2014

Wedding Announcements DOUBLE BOX:

(4" x 3.56" apprx. – 120 words)


Only $

SINGLE BOX: (1.91" x 3.56" apprx. – 60 words)


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Let our readers know about your engagement, wedding or anniversary! To place your ad call:

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Search for … Gay San Diego, San Diego Uptown News or San Diego Downtown News


GAY SAN DIEGO March 7–20, 2014


The girls our mothers still warn us about CALEB RAINEY OUT ON THE PAGE “Chicana” is an identity that was reclaimed during the 1960s and ‘70s, when the political organizing of Americans of Mexican descent began to gain real traction in the United States. The word seeks to foreground the indigenous ancestry of Mexican-Americans and refuses to privilege the European/ Spanish ancestry instead. The Chicano movement of the ‘60s and ‘70s struggled for issues like quality education, access to healthcare, immigration reform, worker’s rights, and other issues specific to the Chicano experience in the U.S. I say Chicano experience here because the specific needs of Chicanas and LGBT Chicano/as often went unacknowledged in this otherwise vibrant resistance movement. Because of these exclusions, as well as the racism of the women’s and LGBT movements, Chicanas and LGBT Chicana/os began building their own independent movements. Out of these resistance struggles sprouted a kind of Chicana literary renaissance and many of the most prominent voices of the time were Chicana lesbians. Cherríe Moraga and Gloria Anzaldúa were certainly the most well known voices of the time, but

their voices were joined by Alicia Gaspar de Alba, Emma Pérez, and Carla Trujillo, among others. These voices were critical in shedding light on the issues faced by Chicana lesbians, a group of women often ignored and sometimes even considered mythical. These brave lesbian writers created a space for Chicana lesbians to be able to see themselves reflected positively in art and literature and they created a community. On March 21, the San Diego Multicultural LGBT Literary Foundation will partner with the Women’s Museum of California to celebrate this cultural legacy of art and resistance. Carla Trujillo, one of these early Chicana lesbian voices, will read alongside one of the heirs to and sustainers of this vibrant literary landscape. Trujillo’s groundbreaking anthology, “Chicana Lesbians: The Girls Our Mothers Warned Us About,” also served as the inspiration for the title of this event. Luna Lemus’ contributions to Chicana lesbian literature continues the conversations started in the ‘70s and ‘80s, and considers issues still facing Chicana lesbians in the 21st century. These two come together in an intergenerational dialogue that highlights Chicana lesbian contributions to arts and literature. Trujillo will be reading from her novel “What Night Brings,”

which follows the young narrator, Marcy Cruz, as she struggles with her budding lesbianism in a world where her relationship to her church and her family make it impossible to imagine her life as a lesbian. Luna Lemus, on the other hand, offers us the story of Leticia Marisol Estrella Torez, a young lesbian growing up between L.A.’s hipster scene and her more traditional upbringing. While both Felicia and Leticia in some ways benefitted from the activism of their Chicana lesbian foremothers, they still inherited a world that remained largely hostile to their existence. “Chicana Lesbians: The Girls Our Mothers Still Warn Us About” seeks to continue the fight for a world in where Chicana lesbians not only survive, but thrive. In addition to the readings of Trujillo and Lemus, “Chicana Lesbians” will also feature a queer Chicana book fair that seeks to broaden understanding of and familiarity with Chicana lesbian contributions to arts and literature. The event will be held Friday, March 21, from 7 to 9 p.m. at the Women’s Museum of California, located at 2730 Historic Decatur Rd., Barracks 16, in Liberty Station. Tickets are only $10 and are expected to sell out quickly, as there is limited space. Special ticket prices exist for those with a limited income. For more information, visit, call 619233-7963, or stop by the museum. As a supplement to this exciting event, the San Diego Multicultural LGBT Literary Foundation will be focusing our monthly ReadOut Meet-up on Luna Lemus’ “Trace Elements of Random Tea Parties.” The ReadOut Meet-up meets once a month to discuss the authors that the Foundation brings to San Diego and their books. Join us to discuss this amazing author and her work before she comes to San Diego! The group meets Saturday, March 15 from 5 – 6 p.m. at The San Diego LGBT Center’s library. The Center is located at 3909 Centre St., in Hillcrest. For more information on the ReadOut program visit —Caleb Rainey recently graduated with his master’s degree in cultural studies. He is a long-time social justice enthusiast and the founder and executive director of the San Diego Multicultural LGBT Literary Foundation. Contact him at


WOMENSCHORUS once again. Chorus President and Alto 1 Caren Scheinen said she just wanted to “get the conversation started” regarding the possibility of a small grant. She said Executive Director John Brown asked them to come in to talk and what they got was much more than she ever expected. “They were ready to launch this new Lesbian Health Initiative and looking for organizations to partner with,” Scheinen said. “They thought we’d be a perfect organization to do fundraising with and get it off the ground.” According to its website, the SDHDF “is the sole community foundation in our region dedicated to the benefit of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) people.” The local nonprofit helps finance projects and programs that “promote equal treatment, tolerance, wellness, well-being, and above all else, human dignity.” The Lesbian Health Initiative will focus on developing specific outreach services and programs for preventive care. With the SDWC’s theme of “Songs of Protest, Songs of Peace” already selected, the two groups began brainstorming ideas to take the group’s annual spring concert to another level with the hopes of raising money for both causes. “We threw out a bunch of names and Indigo Girls came up very early,” Scheinen said. “But we thought they’d be out of our price range. We needed someone willing to understand that we were doing this as a fundraiser.” With a 100-member-strong chorus, an endowment’s sponsorship list, a theme and a cause that would both knowingly resonate — and Brown tapped to head up the negotiations — the two nonprofits decided to take a chance and reach out to the Indigo Girls. “We talked and talked and talked to their people and they wanted to find a way to make it work,” Brown said. “They liked the idea. So we worked and worked and worked and finally, all the stars aligned and they said yes.” “It took a number of months but they said yes and we were shocked and thrilled,” Scheinen said. “It was definitely a shot in the dark and we were incredibly pleased they saw the benefit in what we were doing.” Though the iconic lesbian duo is donating their time, SDHDF is covering all the out of pocket costs for them and their crew; but Brown sees the entire endeavor as worth every penny. “When we announced to the chorus that they’d be singing with the Indigo Girls,” he said, “some of them started crying they were so excited and moved, and that is really satisfying for us.” Brown is equally committed to the SDHDF’s new initiative, which stands to receive 40 percent of the concert’s proceeds. He said that although the specific criteria for the endowment is still evolving, they expect to have an RFP out on the street by fall and the first round of grants awarded by the end of the year. He said will be looking to women leaders in the community to lead the charge and they’ll have his full support. As it turns out, Scheinin herself may have been one of the chorus members who shed a tear or two at the news the Indigo Girls would be sharing the stage with them; she has been a devoted fan of the band since coming out in college and has seen the group 30 or 40 times. “I definitely went through a phase in my life where I travelled to Atlanta, and I saw them in Chicago … and up in Vancouver and all the way down the coast,” she said. “That summer [after graduating college] I saw them 10 or 11 times over a two week period. “They are a really important artists and they were there for me in a very important transformative time in my life,” she said. The format of the concert is different from that of a traditional concert, but ticket holders should enjoy it. The SDWC will “open” with their traditional spring concert program, Scheinen said, which will last approximately 45 minutes and include 13 or 14 selections. Then the Indigo Girls will take the stage and perform five or six songs before the chorus returns to join them for a finale consisting of two popular Indigo Girls songs that match the “Songs of Protest, Songs of Peace” theme. When it comes to the concert’s overall theme, Scheinin doesn’t want people to be confused about what it stands for. “We certainly will cover [music of the ‘60s and anti-war songs] but we are also doing songs about civil rights and an amazing antiapartheid song, and we are doing a ‘60s medley but we’re also doing more contemporary stuff. We’re singing ‘Talking About a Revolution’ by Tracy Champman and … we’re singing ‘Brave’ by Sara Bareilles, and some really fantastic choral pieces that fit into this idea of singing for peace and singing to overcoming oppression,” she said. “We’re incredibly grateful to the Human Dignity Foundation for presenting this opportunity to us,” Scheinen said. The SDWC will present their spring concert, “Songs of Protest, Songs of Peace,” May 18 starting at 7 p.m. at the Balboa Theatre, located at 868 Fourth Ave., Downtown. A VIP party will take place immediately following the concert at the Hard Rock Café at 801 Fourth Ave., for all the sponsors that helped make the evening happen and those who pay $250 for better seating and access to the party, which will have food and a hosted bar for the first hour. For more information visit or sdwc. org. Tickets are on sale now. General admission seating can be purchased through Ticketmaster. VIP tickets can be purchased by calling 619-291-3383.t


GAY SAN DIEGO March 7–20, 2014


(All photos by Vinnie Meehan)


GAY SAN DIEGO March 7–20, 2014

Friday, March 7

LIVE MUSIC – SUE PALMER: Join our very own Queen of Boogie Woogie in the new Expatriate Room at 8:30 p.m. $5 cover if dining, $10 music only. Croce’s Park West, 2760 Fifth Ave., Bankers Hill. Call 619-233-4355 or visit COCKTAILS AND CONVERSATION: Fundraising event presented by HRC San Diego’s Federal Club in partnership with Shane Bittney Crone (Bridegroom the Movie). Federal Club membership is $100 per month, join and be a part of the push for equal rights. Attendance is by nomination and invite only. Contact Joshua Tucker, for more information. 7 – 9 p.m. The Prado, 1549 El Prado, Balboa Park.

Saturday, March 8

SOFTBALL PLAYER CLINICS: America’s Finest City Softball League (AFSCL) currently has 45 teams and over 600 players but they are offering one final chance for you to join their spring 2014 season, which starts on Sunday, March 9. All new players must attend one of these two clinics. Women: 8:30 a.m. Open: 11 a.m. $55 for 20 games. If you don’t have a team they will find you one. Hourglass Park, 10440 Black Mountain Rd. on the Miramar College campus. Visit SDAFFL OPENING DAY: The San Diego American Flag Football League (SDAFFL) spring season begins today at Doyle Rec Center, 8175 Regents Blvd., in University City. With 18 teams drafted in January, they’re all set, but sitting on the sidelines and watching these games is the next best thing to playing. For more info visit SDAFFL SOCIAL: Join the SDAFFL players after the opening day games at Gossip Grill’s new location for a social. 1220 University Ave., Hillcrest.

Sunday, March 9

GLSEN COMEDY FUNDRAISER: A “fun”raiser for the San Diego Chapter of the Gay, Lesbian, Straight Education Network (GLSEN). $20 gets you a wine and cheese reception followed by a night of stand-up comedy. Host for the evening is GLSEN Co-Chair Chet Sewell (a comedian himself). Other performers include Sarah Burford, Tony Calabrese, Chris Clobber, Al Gavi, Steve Heyl, and Diane Jean. Diversionary Theatre, 4545 Park Blvd., in University Heights. For tickets visit AFCSL OPENING DAY: Come watch some quality softball on opening day of the new spring season. Women’s Division plays at Poway Sportsplex, 12349 McIvers Court off of Scripps Poway Parkway and the Open Division plays at the Santee Sportsplex, located at 9900 Riverwalk Dr., off of Cuyamaca Street and Mast Boulevard. Games begin at 8 a.m. at both locations. For more information, visit DRAG CONTEST AT LIPS: Join Paris, Lips Divas crew and past performers of “So You Think You Can Drag?” for a night of giving back to community. $500 in cash & prizes will go to winning amateur or professional drag artist. All cover charges, 25 percent of dinner sales go to Rady Children’s Hospital. Seating 7 – 10 p.m. Cover $5, $15 min.. For reservations, visit lipssd. com or call 619-295-7900. MINK: Flak Productions and Grace Towers present MINK with guest artist Disco Dollie and guestDJ Shane Stiel. Touted as “a place where ART meets MUSIC meets the most fabulous YOU." People are still raving about last month’s inaugural performance so don’t miss this one. Doors open at 9 p.m., and the genderfuxxx and androgyny start at 10 p.m. The Merrow, 1271 University Ave., Hillcrest. For more info, visit

Monday, March 10

RUPAUL’S DRAG RACE: Every Monday join Chad Michaels as host of the season six viewing party, starting at 9 p.m. on the big screens on the dance floor with extended happy hour. Sign up to be a Dueling Diva yourself — two contestants will compete each week at 10:30 p.m., judged by audience right after show, until the end of the season. Urban MO’s, 308 University Ave. Visit or call 619491-0400. To become a contestant, visit DINE IN MOVIE MONDAYS: The new Gossip Grill has a new address and a new Monday night. You can still get all you can eat spaghetti for just $5 from 6 – 11 p.m., but now you can enjoy it with a great movie inside the restaurant (patio mongers get music) and a popcorn bar starting at 8 p.m. Gossip Grill is now located at 1220 University Ave., in Hillcrest. For more info, visit

Tuesday, March 11

LESBIAN MEET-UP: Weekly early morning business networking meeting, offering a chance to share and support each other’s business or passions. All lesbians in community are invited. 7:30 – 8:30 a.m. Caffe Calabria,

3933 30th St., North Park. TALKING TUESDAY: Fivecourse beer pairing menu with Firestone Brewery of Paso Robles. $40 per person. Croce’s Park West, 2760 Fifth Ave., Bankers Hill. Call 619-233-4355 or visit

Wednesday, March 12

PICTIONARY: Come play with Tiger … and Sister Ida Know on the back patio. Match your skills, win fun prizes and raise money for good causes. 7:30–10 p.m. #1 on 5th, 3845 Fifth Ave. DREAMGIRLS REVUE: Every Wednesday Chad Michaels and the DreamGirls take the stage and will convince you to cough up those dollar bills. Doors at 7 p.m. show at 8 p.m., $ 7 cover. Urban MO’s, 308 University Ave. For reservations call 619-491-0400.

Thursday, March 13

GSDBA LUNCH EVENT: The GSDBA — in cooperation with the National Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce (NGLCC) and Add Us In — is offering a program briefing to local businesses about how they can benefit from using pre-screened, highly qualified interns with disabilities. Complimentary lunch will be provided. 12:30 – 2 p.m. Handlery Hotel, 950 Hotel Circle North in Mission Valley. For more info, visit #LEZ AT RICH’S: The women are at Rich’s tonight for DJ Von Kiss, hot go go girls, 10 p.m. – 2 a.m. 1051 University Ave., in Hillcrest. For more info, MALE BOX NIGHT: While the girls are playing at Rich’s the boys are invited across the street to Gossip Grill for this inaugural event, which will repeat ever y Thursday going for ward. Special menu, drink specials and rotating DJs. 9 p.m. Gossip Grill is now located at 1220 University Ave. For more info, visit AN EVENING WITH COCO PERU: Join Coco as she shares her life, sings, and offers you therapeutic antecdotes. $25 reserved seating with a $15 food/drink minimum. 8 p.m. Martinis Above Fourth, 3940 Fourth Ave. Visit

Friday, March 14

GAYDAYSAZ GIVEAWAYS: Ian Joseph, aka Joey Konecek and producer of Gay Days Arizona, is back in town and will be at Gossip Grill tonight offering more informa-

tion on this new Gay Days event, parties and other activities, the host resort, and giving away plenty of prizes, including free tickets to Gay Days AZ. Gossip Grill is now located at 1220 University Ave. in Hillcrest. For more info visit HARNESS: Every second Friday of the month join this new monthly “gear” party. Numbers Nightclub, 3811 Park Blvd. in Hillcrest. Visit or call 619-294-7583.

Saturday, March 15

SHE SHE DANCE: “35 and older” women's event. Singles mixer 5 – 7 p.m., live performance by Dream Rocker (featuring Garrison Bailey) 7 – 7:30 p.m. and DJ dancing to Old School and Top 40 with DJ Kinky Loops from 7:30 – 10:30 p.m. $12 cover. Full bar and gourmet tacos will also be available. Sunset Temple (next to Claire de Lune) 3911 Kansas St. North Park. For more info, visit SHAMROCK IN THE GASLAMP: The biggest St. Patty’s Day block party in the county, with 80,000 square feet of green (Astroturf) jam-packed with Irish fun: three stages, six Irish bands, 10 different deejays, go go dancers, Irish dancers, and more. 21+ event. Advance general/VIP tickets are $40/$65 til March 14, $45/$85 after March 14. Fifth Ave & J St, Downtown. 4 p.m. – 12 a.m. For more info visit

Friday, March 14

GAYDAYSAZ GIVEAWAYS: Ian Joseph, aka Joey Konecek and producer of Gay Days Arizona, will be at Urban MO’s tonight offering more info on new Gay Days event, the host resort, and giving away free tickets to Gay Days AZ. Urban MO’s is located at 308 University Ave. Visit

Sunday, March 16

COMPLETELY KAHLO – EXTENDED AGAIN!: “The Complete Frida Kahlo. Her Paintings. Her Life. Her Story.” Exhibition with audio guide features 123 precise replicas of Kahlo’s known paintings in their original size,the most comprehensive exhibition ever created about the iconic Mexican artist’s work, life and story, now extended through June 8. Open Wed thru Sun, 10 a.m. – 6 p.m. Barracks 3, Liberty Station, 2765 Truxton Rd., Tickets start $12.50. Visit

Monday, March 17

MOVIE MONDAY: Come celebrate St. Patrick’s Day with “Waking

Ned Devine” a funny, funny Irish film in the new Expatriate Room. $40 per person. Croce’s Park West, 2760 Fifth Ave., Bankers Hill. Call 619-233-4355 for reservations. For more info YOGA FOR EVERYONE: Wanting to try yoga but afraid to start? Check out this weekly free basic yoga class at The Center, taught by Tim Schultheis. Options available for the more advanced. 10:30 – 11:30 a.m. The LGBT Center, 3909 Centre St., Hillcrest. Contact LaRue Fields,

Tuesday, March 18

LESBIAN MEET-UP: New weekly early morning business networking meeting, offering a chance to share and support each other’s business or passions. All lesbians in community are invited. 7:30 – 8:30 a.m. Caffe Calabria, 3933 30th St., North Park. AFTER WORK OFFROAD WITH RAINBOW CYCLISTS: These midweek rides vary but last a couple hours and generally take you to Mission Trails, Pensaquitos or San Clemente Canyon. Starts at 5:30 p.m. and it gets dark so you need a light. Call Bill 858-467-1090 or wroundt1@ in advance for details and start location. PAINTING AND VINO: Local professional artists instruct attendees on painting a masterpiece. Tonight – “Stained Glass” at Wine Steals in Cardiff, 1953 San Elijo, Cardiff by the Sea. Event is 6 – 9 p.m. and is 21+ up. Cost is $45, all supplies included, but registration is required. Visit

Wednesday, March 19

WHICH WICH ANNIVERSARY: Help Which Wich celebrate their 5-year anniversary in Hillcrest and raise money for The San Diego LGBT Center at the same time. $5 sandwich combo specials with 50 percent being donated to The Center. Which Wich, 3825 Fifth Ave. Call 619-574-9424 or email

Thursday, March 20

COMMUNITY ORGANIZATIONS SOCIAL: Meet the board of directors for the Imperial Court de San Diego and mingle with leaders of various other community organizations. Share your ideas, learn how to volunteer, listen to special guest speakers and more. 6 – 9 p.m. Jakes on 6th Wine Bar, 3755 Sixth Ave., Hillcrest. Call 619-291-9463 or visit

For inclusion in the calendar, email


PUTIN HUGS A GAY SKATER Across 1 Lincoln’s head covering 7 Condition after getting cold-cocked 13 Shirley’s “Terms of Endearment” role, and others 15 Limerick’s river 16 Jon of “The Daily Show” 17 Start of Jon’s comment on Putin hugging skater Ireen Wust 18 Dan Savage memoir, with “The” 19 Big bang cause, briefly 21 One of Sappho’s pair 22 River of Gay Paree 25 “Love Story” composer 26 Says a “Hail Mary,” e.g. 28 More of the comment 31 Gutsy Greek 33 Prayer of Harvey Fierstein’s faith 36 Alpo alternative 37 More of the comment 39 Sondheim’s “ ___ the Woods” 40 Press the flesh with

42 Frat letter, briefly 43 It can cut leaves of grass 44 Barnyard layer 45 Journalist Tim 48 “ ___ Miz” 49 Attacks 51 What King Edward II used to sock it to Piers Gaveston? 53 End of the comment 57 Ill will 60 Dorian Gray creator Wilde 61 Roddy McDowall’s “Planet of the ___ “ 65 Bard’s river 66 Andean pack animal 67 Tide type 68 Put out 69 Tether 70 Reid of “Josie and the Pussycats”

Putin Hugs a Gay Skater solution on page 15 Down 1 Blow job and and other jobs 2 Mauve hanky delight 3 Fix 4 “In what way?” 5 Constellation over Sydney or Rio 6 Mountain pool 7 Logical start for Rev. Jane Spahr? 8 Like hard-core porn 9 Latina writer Castillo 10 Without mercy 11 Bacon said it’s “a good servant and a bad master” 12 Starts the pot 14 Calm 15 Winter problem for guys 20 Figure skater Babilonia 23 Tend with tenderness 24 Summer D.C. setting 26 Third degree, often 27 Took advantage of a decorator? 29 Morse’s long one

30 Fluid acquired by pumping 31 Love-making sounds 32 1929 Cole Porter tune 34 “ ___ Magnolias” 35 Mount 38 Ill. neighbor 41 Long pants, for short 43 “To be” to Henri 46 Spread open 47 Gung-ho 50 Rita Mae Brown’s “Cat on the ___” 52 Randolph Scott’s companion Cary 54 Lesbos, for one 55 Final Four letters 56 Groups of Moby Dick’s species 57 “Heather ___ Two Mommies” 58 Liberty, in “QAF” 59 Big load 62 Shooter “bullet” 63 Organ pleasured by Bernstein 64 Site for three men in a tub




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Garden • Shop Classes • Services 3685 Voltaire St. San Diego 619.223.5229 •




With over 12 years of experience, San Diegan Chris Kanakaris has brought his one-of-a-kind fitness center to Mission Hills. The Change Fitness focuses on oneon-one personal training, including cardio training, weight training, flexibility training, and posture alignment, plus massage therapy. Additionally, Kanakaris provides his clients with numerous nutritional resources designed to improve health. Along with being recognized by members of the Poway City Council for excellence, Kanakaris has personally trained members of the Gracie Jujitsu family. Injury prevention and patient aftercare is key at The Change Fitness, and you will never have to pay a gym membership fee. So if you are not getting the results you want from your current workout regimen, book an appointment today. Affordable rates plus proven results make The Change Fitness your local workout hub.

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Abbas, Jenson & Cundari CPAs is proud to announce the addition of a new partner to its practice. Jeremy Dutson will be joining Tom Abbas, Rulon Jenson, and Chris Cundari as one of four Certified Public Accountants at the firm. In 2007, Jeremy began his internship with Abbas Jenson & Cundari. During this time, he realized that a future in accounting as a tax specialist was the path he wanted to follow. After graduating with a bachelor’s degree in accounting, he received a full-time position at Abbas Jenson & Cundari. Jeremy received his CPA license on Feb. 26, 2010. Jeremy believes that effective tax planning and comprehensive tax preparation can reduce the amount of taxes one pays, and that management of finances should be done consistently and often. Jeremy takes great pleasure in forming new relationships with individual and business clients, and he looks forward to strengthening his relationships with his current clients, who put their faith in him when he was just starting out. Abbas Jenson & Cundari offers a variety of tax and accounting services tailored to meet the needs of both small businesses and individuals. The services offered include individual, corporate, partnership and limited liability companies, non-profit tax returns, financial statement preparation and consulting for small businesses.

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GAY SAN DIEGO March 7–20, 2014

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A resident of North Park, Dick Mathurin has been advising in high-value transactions for more than 30 years. Over that time, he has successfully completed more than 500 engagements with an aggregate dollar value exceeding $2.5 billion. An expert in the analysis and valuation of properties, Dick has broad experience in the valuation of residential, commercial, industrial and marine properties in all value ranges. Many of his transactions have been international in flavor and many of his clients have been business executives and high net-worth individuals. Dick is a senior staff member at Coldwell Banker and has the unique distinction of being designated by the company as both an accredited residential real estate agent and as a certified commercial real estate agent. His practice is focused primarily on the North Park neighborhood extending to Bankers Hill. Dick is a long-time owner and breeder of registered standard bred horses. Over the years, he has owned and developed two world champions, three national season champions and five track record holders. In 2008, his filly “Exotic Destination,” won the World Trotting Derby in record time.











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BRIEFS SAN DIEGO GAY MENS CHORUS TO PLAY OCEANSIDE DAYS OF ART The 22nd annual Oceanside Days of Art (ODA) will take place on April 26 and 27, featuring the fine art of more than 100 local artists and a performance by San Diego Gay Men’s Chorus, among several other notable performers. Put on by the Oceanside Cultural Arts Foundation, the ODA is a free, family-friendly festival offering hands-on activities for children and adults, live demonstrations of artists working with a variety of mediums, and a wide variety of food choices. Additionally, the nearby Oceanside Museum of Art will offer free admission both days. For more information, visit BICYCLE ADVISORY GROUP APPROVED On March 4, City Council voted to create the City’s first Bicycle Advisory Committee, which will provide recommendations to the City on local bicycle projects and its Bicycle Master Plan Update. The committee will be comprised of local bicycle advocates and residents. The formation of the committee comes just before the impending implementation of SANDAG’s planned construction of bicycle corridors throughout San Diego’s urban areas, which is expected to begin early next year. GSD LAUNCHES SAME-SEX MARRIAGE ANNOUNCEMENTS SECTION In order to support and celebrate the growing number of same-sex marriages occurring in the San Diego region since Prop. 8 was rescinded last June, Gay San Diego has begun offering same-sex marriage announcements for publication. The announcements will allow LGBT couples to announce their engagements, weddings, or anniversaries to the community at large for a fee. The announcements will be printed in the Gay San Diego newspaper and will also readable online at the website. “Now that same-sex marriage is legal again in the state of California, it is time for people in the community to share their love and bonds publicly, and Gay San Diego wants to be that vehicle,” said Editor Morgan M. Hurley. “This is something that will surely be appreciated and no one else is currently doing it.” Basic wedding announcements will be made available for a small fee and those wishing to expand the announcement and include a photograph may also do so. Custom, more extravagant announcements will also be made available. For more information, see the Gay San Diego Wedding Section or contact Mike Rosensteel at

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GAY SAN DIEGO March 7–20, 2014



GAY SAN DIEGO March 7–20, 2014




The Flicks Fireballs are excited for the upcoming AFCSL Spring Season. (Courtesy Flicks Fireballs)

Huge opening weekend in San Diego SDAFFL Opening Day The large storm that hit San Diego over the first weekend in March counted our local flag football league’s Opening Day among its victims, as fields at Doyle Community Park were deemed unplayable. The San Diego American Flag Football League (SDAFFL), then, will kick off its 11th season on Saturday, March 8 with a record 18 teams in the fold. Rosters are full, so if you did not get drafted on to a team, you will have to join the large swath of spectators that makes it out to SDAFFL games every Saturday

beginning at 9 a.m. At the end of the season, the top teams will battle in an A Division playoff, while the lower half of teams will have their own B Division playoff. Gay Bowl is flag football’s version of a national title game, and while teams do not automatically qualify for the event, local players hope to play well enough during the regular season to be considered for San Diego’s Gay Bowl draft. Three teams will be selected for Gay Bowl teams, with the event being held Oct. 9 – 12 in Philadelphia. SDAFFL popularity is at an alltime high, and the league is known for its raging Saturday postgame social activities. Give them a look at their new website AFCSL Opening Day America’s Finest City Softball League (AFCSL) will kick off its 33rd season on Sunday, March 9 at fields located in Poway and Santee. Once again, under the leadership of Women’s Commissioner Dani Goodlett and AFCSL Commissioner Roman Jimenez, the popular softball league has increased its total number of teams. The teams are set, and there are 42 of them overall. However, it is not too late to join AFCSL if interested. Players without existing ratings are required to attend a new player clinic, and the March 2nd clinic was rained out. The rescheduled clinic will be held Saturday, March 8 at Mira Mesa’s Hourglass Park (women at 8 a.m., open at 11 a.m.). Participants are asked to bring a glove and cleats, as they will be run through a set of basic drills in order to determine their general playing ability. If an attendee does not already have a team to play on, the league will help find them one. The player fee is just $55 for a minimum of 20 games during Spring Season, making AFCSL a fantastic value. In the Open Division — women are welcome to play in this division — the B Division has welcomed the return of 2012 Division Champion Spikes, promising an intense title chase with the Loft and Strike Force (formerly the Diegans). These teams will also play up to six games in their interleague series against teams from Los Angeles and Palm Springs. AFCSL surpassed the 25-team Open Division threshold this year, affording the league the right to offer World Series berths to all three B teams. The C Division has 12 teams

that have been split up into East and West. Five of those teams will play exhibitions against B teams, in order to give the B schedule more diversity. The team with the best record will clinch one of the two coveted World Series bids. The next three teams, based on best record, will play in a season-ending three-team playoff, with the winner earning the second berth. The D Division has expanded again to 12 teams. Everyone will play each other twice during the season, with the top two teams earning berths to the Series, which will be held in Dallas during the week of Sept. 22 – 27. The Women’s Division boasts 15 teams, with two in B, six in C and seven in D. The ladies play under a slightly different set of rules. Their best teams have their World Series berth fees paid for by AFCSL, but technically, any team willing to pay the costly fee is eligible to participate. That said, winning has its rewards and the women will be battling it out in advance of their series, which will be held Oct. 13 – 18 in Las Vegas. The majority of the Open Division will open the season March 9 between 8 a.m. and 3 p.m. at Poway Sportsplex, while the women and four Open D teams will open up at Santee Sportsplex between 8 a.m. and 2 p.m. Visit for more information. “Mona” returns to the Diamond Among the happier storylines in softball for 2014 will be the return of David “Mona” Valenzuela. In January 2013, Mona had his leg amputated from just below the knee, and many feared his longtime athletic career would be over. Not Mona. The veteran who had played in softball, flag football and basketball was determined to get back to pitching in AFCSL. Just a year later, Mona will make his debut with the Flicks Fireballs (formerly Baja Betty’s in the Open D Division). He has been working out with the team, as well as providing a valuable teaching experience for these beginning players. His stay on the D roster is expected to be temporary, as he shakes off the rust and gets comfortable in game action before what hopefully will be a triumphant return to pitching with his Loft friends in the B Division. Congratulations and good luck this year, Mona!

see Sports, pg 19 FROM PAGE 18

SPORTS SD Hoops down to four teams The first round of the SD Hoops ( basketball playoffs featured eight good teams but only one nail-biter, as favorites advanced in three of the four quarterfinal games. #6 Hillcrest Brewing Company upset #3 Baja Betty’s, who held a lead with just 52 seconds remaining but could not hit free throws, allowing HBC to escape with a 48–44 victory. AC Carter led the way with 31 points for the victors, while Betty’s was an atrocious 4–for–16 from the charity stripe. After jumping out to a 15-point halftime lead, #2 The Loft got a second-half scare from veteran Paul Demke and his #7 Bulls & Bears squad, who pulled within five points midway through the second. But the defending champs held on for a 52-40 victory, behind 16 points from Joe Mattia. Many in the league wondered if #8 Flicks would become the first eight-seed to win a playoff game in league history. The formula was there: Flicks is not a bad team in a league full of parity, and #1 Wsup Now had lost two straight and were on the edge of reeling. An ugly first half produce a 13–10 lead for the top seed, but Derek Rice and Patrick Schoettler got the offense revving just enough to lift Wsup Now to a 43–34 victory. Had Flicks found a way to get the ball to Greg Carson in the post more, I think we may have seen history, as Wsup’s ability to defend big men may ultimately spell doom. #4 Pecs capped off the evening with a 51–31 victory over shorthanded #5 Urban MO’s, who only had five players available for the game. Semifinals resume on March 12, with The Loft facing HBC at 7 p.m., following by Wsup Now versus Pecs at 8 p.m.. Anything can happen when a team like HBC has an MVP-type player in Carter, but The Loft has a defensive star in Johnny Stultz and great depth, and should roll in this one. With no rooting interest in these results, I like Pecs to upset Wsup Now. Pecs big man Tommy Miles should get lots of open looks as Wsup tries to keep on scorer Eric Reissner. —Jeff Praught is actively involved in the LGBT sports community, where he plays in the local softball (AFCSL), football (SDAFFL) and basketball (SD Hoops) leagues. He has served on AFCSL’s board of officers in various capacities and is currently the commissioner of SD Hoops. Email him at


GAY SAN DIEGO March 7–20, 2014


Diet or Exercise: What’s more important? working out so they can eat whatever they want. Sure, you’ll get stronger and you’ll feel better, but you won’t visibly see a difference. A healthier way to change outlooks and approaches toward connecting emotions with what we eat is instead of opening the refrigerator door when you’re stressed out, open the gym door so you can redirect your emotions into working out when you aren’t feeling well. You get the mental boost AND the physical/biological response, without the useless calories that ultimately hurt you in the long run.

BLAKE & GWEN BECKCOM FITNESS Diet versus exercise is the “chicken or the egg” debate in the fitness world. While eating right and exercising are both important components of hatching a fit and active lifestyle, a proper diet is the king of the coop when the ultimate goal is to lose weight. Our experiential rule of thumb numerically is that weight loss is 70 percent nutrition, 25 percent movement, and 5 percent genetics. Exercise will increase your energy and give you an overall feeling of well-being, helping you get stronger and fitter, but without adding proper nutrition, you won’t visibly see any difference in how you look. When you add in proper eating, that’s when you’ll start seeing changes in the mirror and how your clothes fit. Changing your attitude about food One of the biggest challenges to losing weight is managing the emotions and attitudes attached to the foods we eat. Whether you turn to food when you’re stressed out or you use your favorite treat as a reward for accomplishing a goal, what you put in your mouth can weigh you down both mentally and physically. Most people know how to eat healthy, but often use food as a way to make themselves feel better. Food can be a drug to face down depression, anxiety, or over working yourself, turning to food for the “feel good” ingredient some foods give us. I also see a lot of people

Getting a grasp on counting calories When you set out on the journey of losing weight, figuring out the proper number and type of calories to consume daily is paramount. To keep the calorie equation simple, calculate proper calorie guidelines based on your activity level, the number of calories you burn at rest, and your ultimate weight loss goals. The key is to keep your calorie intake below the amount of calories you burn on a daily basis during rest and exercise. But, it’s also important to make sure you are consuming enough good calories — high in protein, low in fat, sugar and sodium — to fuel your daily activities and workouts. Ever yone’s calorie range is different, so it’s important to consult a fitness and nutritional professional before starting your weight loss plan so you can hit the ground running shedding pounds and increasing your fitness level. If your objective is weight loss, you should expect to lose one to two pounds per week consistently (on average) by staying within a certain calorie range and eating a diet based around good calories. The best approach is to slowly take it off so it stays off. Crash weight loss is usually associated with expansive gains beyond the original weight loss start point. Slow, steady and consistent wins the race. Be patient, be resolved and be committed. Integrating fitness to fit your goals The final part of the weight loss equation includes setting up a fitness routine that will help you accomplish your goals. When your sole goal is to lose weight, doing a moderation of ever ything — cardio, resistance training and eating properly — is the key to the lock. If your weight loss goals include losing 50 to 100 pounds, it’s important to start off doing a lot of cardio by using ropes, boxing, bicycling, speed walking, hiking, jogging

and the like, to start the process of burning the weight off. Once you lose a reasonable amount of weight, then begin moving into a mix of resistance training with cardio to begin building lean muscle mass. If you are looking to shed the 10 – 20 pounds mixing a full-body resistance program with an alternating inter val-based cardio program will move the needle in the right direction. Focus here on high intensity in a minimal amount of time for the average over weight person doing 20 – 25 minutes of alternating sprints with jogging two to three times per week and then add in resistance training on opposite days for 40 – 45 minutes two times per week. This helps to gradually take weight off and develop lean muscle. Where do you start? If you are like many people you might think that you do not have time to focus on both proper diet and nutrition all at once. Break it down and simply start with getting into an efficient and effective fitness routine, and then adding in proper nutrition shortly after you establish a consistent fitness regimen. Because of the emotional ties often associated with food, it can be more difficult to start out with eating healthy first. At the end of the day, the best approach to increasing your fitness level and decreasing your waistline is by tag teaming your efforts with a healthy diet and exercise program. But, make sure to own your diet and be aware of the amount and types of calories you put into your body. You are what you eat and what you put into your mouth will make a big difference on the success of your weight loss efforts. —Gwen and Blake Beckcom own Fitness Together Mission Hills, of fering personal training with qualified professionals by regular appointment in private suites. Exercise and nutritional programs are custom designed to fit your needs and abilities. Call 619-794-0014 for more information or to schedule a free fitness diagnostic and private training session.t


GAY SAN DIEGO March 7–20, 2014

WIN $100 in Gift Certificates!

Dining and Movie Certificates Available

Vote today and you will be entered to win ENTRY RULES: Choose your favorite! Tell us who the “best of the best” is and you’ll be entered into our free drawing. One “best of” will be awarded in each category. Please complete at least 50% of the ballot. One ballot per person. Ballots must be postmarked, submitted online, or hand-delivered by 5 p.m. on Monday, April 14, 2014. MAIL BALLOTS TO: Gay San Diego, 3737 Fifth Ave., Suite 201, San Diego, CA 92103 OR VOTE ONLINE: CONTACT INFO (Must be completed to be valid for mail-in ballots):


VOTE ONLINE: DINING & ENTERTAINMENT American Cuisine: Bakery: Bar: Bar Cuisine: Barbeque: Bartender: Breakfast: Brunch: Burger: Burrito: Casino: Casual Dining: Chinese Cuisine: Cocktail: Coffee Shop: Craft Beer Bar: Deli: Dessert: Dinner: DJ: Donut Shop: Family Restaurant: Farmers’ Market: Female/Male Impersonator: Fine Dining: French Cuisine: Frozen Yogurt: Greek Cuisine: Hair Dresser: Happy Hour: Healthy Dining: Indian Cuisine: International Cuisine: Italian Cuisine: Japanese Cuisine: Late-night Dining: Leather Bar: Lunch:

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Mexican Cuisine: Micro Brewery: Neighborhood Bar: New Restaurant: Night Club: Outdoor Bar: Outdoor/Patio Dining: Pet-friendly Dining: Pizza: Romantic Dining: Salad: Seafood: Server: Sports Bar: Sub/Sandwich: Sushi: Thai Cuisine: Vegetarian/Vegan: Vietnamese Cuisine: Wine Bar: BUSINESS & RETAIL Accountant: Acupuncture: Adult Business: Antiques: Appliance Store: Art Gallery: Auto Dealership: Auto Repair Shop: Bank: Bike Shop: Boutique: Bridal Shop: Chiropractor: College/University: Consignment Shop: Cosmetic Surgeon: Credit Union:

Day Spa: Dentist: Doctor: Dry Cleaner: Financial Planner: Florist: Furniture Store: Grocery Store: Gym/Workout Studio: Hair Salon: Hardware Store: Health Food Store: Hospital: Hotel: Jeweler: Lawyer: Live Music Venue: Live Theater Venue: Manicure/Pedicure: Massage: Men’s Fashions: New Business: Optometrist: Pawn Shop: Personal Trainer: Pet Boarding/Daycare: Pet Groomer: Pharmacy: Real Estate Agent: Real Estate Office: Resale/Thrift Shop: Retirement Living: Tanning Salon: Tattoo/Piercing Studio: Tuxedo Shop: Veterinary Hospital: Wedding Venue: Women’s Fashions: Yoga Studio:

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