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Volume 5 Issue 1 Jan. 10, – Jan. 23, 2014 Follow us on Facebook and Twitter



Marriage Drama


Pg. 3


Opera in the opera house


San Diego’s thriving company to open its 49th season Charlene Baldridge | GSD Reporter Time flies for opera lovers, who can hardly believe it’s been almost 50 years since the establishing of San Diego Opera (SDO). The well-run, highly successful company opens its four-opera 49th season at the Civic Theatre January 25 with Ruggero Leoncavallo’s great one-act tragedy, “Pagliacci.”

Grooming in the new year


Interim Mayor Todd Gloria (center in dark blue shirt) surrounded by the staff of Hillcrest Brewing Company during the Chargers – Bengals Wildcard game, Jan. 12. (Courtesy MO’s Universe)

Ripe strawberries


Hanging a star in heaven


A theater look-back

Index Opinion…………………6 Briefs……………………7 Calendar………………12 Business……………..15 Fitness…….….….….18

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The ‘Battle of the Queens’ Thanks to the mayor, HBC gets some national attention Morgan M. Hurley | GSD Editor On Sunday, January 5, with camera crews from every local broadcast network on hand, Interim Mayor Todd Gloria — along with droves of gays and lesbians and their friends — gathered together just steps from the base of the 60 foot Hillcrest Pride Flag, located at the corner of University Avenue and Normal St. It wasn’t to protest A&E’s decision to allow Phil Robertson back on Duck Dynasty, nor was it a rally to celebrate or decry the recent news surrounding samesex marriage in Utah. The common cause for this large assembly — which took place at Hillcrest Brewing Company (HBC), located at 1458 University Ave. — was none other than the San Diego Chargers, who after a 9-7 season were taking on the Cincinnati Bengals in a first round Wildcard playoff game. Earlier in the week, Gloria had placed a “friendly wager” with Cincinnati’s Mayor John Cranley; if the Chargers lost, he would send handcrafted brews from both HBC and Thorn Street Brewery in North Park. If the Chargers won, Cranley committed to send Gold Star chili, Graeter’s ice cream and Montgomery Inn BBQ.

“These bets are good spirited and the idea is to provide a little more incentive to the team to bring home a win and to bring a little attention to the businesses that I think deserve it,” Gloria said. Though there was no advance notice of the wager between the two mayors, once details of the wager were released, Eddie Reynoso, marketing and public relations director of MO’s Universe — which includes Urban MO’s, Baja Betty’s, Gossip Grill and HBC — began formulating a plan to take advantage of the impending media boon. “I shared the news with all of our management and let them know this is a great opportunity to blow this up and make it about the brewery and highlight how diverse we are,” Reynoso said. HBC invited the interim mayor to come watch the game and with only a couple days to work with, staff immediately began decorating, buying Chargercolored beads and other give-aways, and all MO’s Universe staff were told to dress up in Chargers gear for game day. Reynoso said his research uncovered the fact that Cincinnati is known as “the Queen City,” and since

A great choice for first-time opera goers, it’s the one in which the titular clown, Canio, sings an aria about donning his costume (“Vesti la giubba”), laughing on the outside while crying on the inside because his young wife, Nedda, is cheating on him. He stabs her to death during a performance of the commedia in which they both appear, horrifying villagers and flushing out Silvio, the baritone she loves. Pagliacci dispatches him as well, and the curtain falls on one of the Italian verismo period’s best-known and

see Battle, pg 3

see Opera, pg9

(l to r) Cast from Gaetano Donizetti’s opera, “The Elixir of Love” (Photo by Robert Millard)

Gay Men’s Chorus play Santa Hillcrest adult care center gets a special holiday gift Morgan M. Hurley | GSD Editor The Glenner Memory Care Centers have been mainstays in Hillcrest for over 30 years, but this past holiday season they got a boost from a local group of guys who love to pay it forward. The San Diego Gay Men’s Chorus (SDGMC) chose The Glenner as its 2013 beneficiary for their annual “Nutcracker: Men in Tights!” holiday show, which took place at the Balboa Theatre on Dec. 14 and 15. Early in each performance, attendees were given a short presentation and then were asked to participate by dropping donations for The Glenner into the “Big Ruby Slipper” in the lobby during intermission. A week later, members of the SDGMC presented The Glenner Memory Care Centers with a check for $2,128, a total of the donations raised over the two performances. Aside from the financial help, the chorus members themselves also contributed, bringing a cache of other useful arts and crafts items for use at their adult day care program. It was Kevin Hannahoe — a First Tenor with the SDGMC and also a special events volunteer at The Glenner — who first approached both groups with the idea of having the local nonprofit as this year’s annual beneficiary. However, The Glenner’s ties to the SDGMC were even deeper than they initially realized. After the organization was approved, it became

(l to r) Maria Stefanic and Gloria de Aragon Baker of Glenner, Marc Mangiantini of SDGMC, Anne Saita and Anette Aser of Glenner, and Kevin Hannahoe, a Glenner volunteer and first tenor with SDGMC. (Courtesy The Glenner Memory and Care Centers)

known that outgoing artistic director Gary Holt’s father had received care at The Glenner for several years back in the 1990s. Anne Saita, The Glenner’s marketing and developmental manager, said she immediately made sure to adjust her presentation to include time for remarks from Holt during the Chorus performances. “There could be no better testimonial,” she said. “My mother and I were able to witness, first-hand, the tremendous support and incredible services offered by The Glenner Center,” Holt said.

see Chorus, pg 4


GAY SAN DIEGO Jan. 10–23, 2014


The drama in Utah Lisa Keen | Keen News Service Same-sex marriage now on hold after 18 days The full U.S. Supreme Court has granted Utah a stay on a district court decision that has allowed same-sex couples to marry there since Dec. 20. The court issued its stay this morning, apparently after Justice Sonia Sotomayor referred the matter to the full court. Sotomayor is the justice designated to administer requests for emergency stays for the Tenth Circuit U.S. Court of Appeals, but had the option to ask the full court to weigh in on the request. It takes at least five justices to grant such a stay. The order issued today does not indicate that any justice was in dissent. It states simply that the stay is granted and that the Dec. 20 order by U.S. District Court that prohibited Utah from enforcing its ban is “stayed pending final disposition” of the appeal of that decision to the Tenth Circuit. Given the Tenth Circuit’s briefing schedule for the appeal, that means the ban will be in force for at least three months and likely longer, given anticipated appeals of whatever the Tenth Circuit decides. Tomsic and James Magleby, with the private law firm of Magleby & Greenwood which is representing same-sex couples in the case, issued a statement following the Supreme Court’s announcement, noting that it is “not unusual” for the court to stay a decision declaring a state law unconstitutional pending appeal and has “no bearing on who will win on appeal.”

LGBT legal activists agreed. “No one should draw any negative inferences about where the Court is leaning. This is an unprecedented situation,” said Shannon Minter, legal director for the National Center for Lesbian Rights, which has several marriage equality lawsuits pending now, too. “Never before has a federal court struck down a state marriage law and then declined to stay it, and never before has a Court of Appeals also declined to issue a stay. For those reasons, the chances that the Supreme Court would issue a stay until the appeal is resolved were always quite high, so the real news here is that so many marriages were able to take place. And it is significant that the Court did not rush to act. There is nothing unusual about the issuance of a stay when a federal court strikes down a state law on federal grounds. “Bottom line,” Minter said, “[is] the prospects for this case still look very bright. And there will never be any going back in Utah.” The challenge to Utah’s ban (the state constitutional Amendment 3 and related statutes), Kitchen v. Herbert, now proceeds as Herbert v. Kitchen on an expedited schedule before the Tenth Circuit U.S. Court of Appeals. The next briefing date, according to attorney Peggy Tomsic who is part of the team representing same-sex couples, is Jan. 27. The last brief due before oral argument is Feb. 25. The court date has not yet been announced but the next argument session after that deadline is March 17–21. The Deseret News reports that more than 900 same-sex couples

married in Utah since December 20, when District Judge Robert Shelby, an Obama appointee, issued a 53page opinion, striking down Utah’s ban violates the U.S. Constitutional guarantees of equal protection and due process. Shelby immediately enjoined the state from enforcing its ban, then denied the state’s request for a stay of his decision pending appeal. The state took its request for an emergency stay to the Tenth Circuit, where it also filed an appeal of Shelby’s decision. Two judges of the Tenth Circuit — one an appointee of President George W. Bush, the other an appointee of President Obama — denied the request for a stay on Dec. 24 but put the appeal on an expedited schedule. “This stay is obviously disappointing for the families in Utah who need the protection of marriage and now have to wait to get married until the appeal is over,” said plaintiffs’ attorney Magleby. “Every day that goes by, same-sex couples and their children are being harmed by not being able to marry and be treated equally.” Utah AG says 1,300 marriages invalid The Utah Attorney General Sean Reyes issued a statement Wednesday afternoon saying that he was “unable to reach a legal conclusion as to the ultimate validity of marriage between persons of the same sex who completed their marriage ceremony in Utah between Dec. 20, 2013, and Jan. 6, 2014.” “That question remains unanswered and the answer will depend on the result of the appeal process,” continued Reyes. He said any same-sex couple applying for some state marriage benefit or recognition would be evaluated on a “case-by-case basis”

“It was a social occasion for me as much as it was work,” Gloria said. “People were coming up to me, people I knew and didn’t know, there were all in the spirit and they were all excited and I think that is one of the best parts of this job, you get to HBC is known as “The Queens of Beer,” a “Battle of be the cheerleader in chief during this time and I’m the Queens” became the instant PR tagline. happy to play that role.” “There are 70 breweries in SD — how do we “I went up to personally thank [Gloria] for stand out from the rest? We took the play on words choosing HBC as the lwocation to cheer on the and really maximized it,” he said. Chargers,” Sneeringer said. “I told him that it Although Gloria’s original bet amounted to a six meant a great deal to spotlight a local Hillcrest pack of HBC’s bottled brews for the opposing team’s gay-owned establishment and have it covered by so mayor, MO’s Universe owner Chris Shaw decided to many members of the media.” up the ante. Local news teams from Channel 10, KUSI, Fox 5 “[Shaw] said, ‘win or lose we want [Cincinnati] to and others, stayed the entire game and interviewed know how great our beer is not only Gloria, but also and how great the craft indusstaff and many of the fans in try is in San Diego,’” Reynoso attendance, as they jockeyed said. “So we decided to send for position during their beer not only to the mayor live broadcasts. Members but also the team and now we from the SDAFFL were also are talking with Thorn Street on hand to distribute fliers Brewery to see how we can and recruit players for their make that happen.” upcoming 2014 season. Regulations on the “A lot of our HBC staff transfer of alcohol between are football fans, so they states may make the final really got into it,” Reynoso transaction difficult, but said. “They were running Reynoso said MO’s Universe around pumping up the is determined. crowd and it was a fun Come game day, the brewgame.” ery — which also boasts piz“It was … a spectacularly zas, wings, salads, a number beautiful day,” Sneeringer of handcrafted brews made on said. “There was a buzz in the premises and a long list of the air about the Chargers other local brewery beers on being in the playoffs, the tap — was overflowing with great Hillcrest Farmers’ media and revelers, some Market was going and it (top) HBC staff being interviewed by Fox 5 News. seemed like everybody was who told staff they had never been to thwe brewery before. (bottom) Interim Mayor Gloria fields a question in a great mood. It was one from a news team. (Photos Courtesy MO’s Universe) HBC has since reported that of those days that made you approximately 180 people glad to be a San Diegan.” visited the brewery throughout the game. The Chargers went on to win that game, 27-10, “It was definitely the biggest and the most lively crowd and advance to the divisional playoff round against I have ever seen rooting for the Chargers at HBC,” said the Denver Broncos. That game, broadcasting from Sue Sneeringer, member services director of GSDBA and Denver, will be held this Sunday, Jan. 12, at 4:40 often a regular on Sundays during football season. p.m., EST. Gloria’s bet with the mayor of Denver will They interim mayor, who said he was surprised involve a variety of San Diego’s great Mexican food anyone would be interested in seeing him watch a options. To learn more about HBC, visit hillcrestfootball game, had a “blast.”



GAY SAN DIEGO Jan. 10–23, 2014 by a “review team” established just for that purpose. Reyes also stated that the U.S. Supreme Court’s grant of a stay against the federal district court decision that struck down Utah’s ban on marriage for same-sex couples “means that Utah’s laws defining marriage … are again in effect …” The attorney general’s statement acknowledges that 1,300 same-sex couples have married in the two-and-a-half weeks since U.S. District Court Judge Robert Shelby issued his decision and immediately enjoined the state from enforcing its ban. The U.S. Supreme Court on Monday granted Utah’s stay against Shelby’s order. Later, Governor Gary Herbert’s office issued a statement, saying, “Based on counsel from the Attorney General’s Office regarding the Supreme Court decision, state recognition of same-sex marital status is ON HOLD until further notice. Please understand this position is not intended to comment on the legal status of those same-sex marriages — that is for the courts to decide.” “There is no reason for the state to destabilize these families,” said Shannon Minter, legal director for the National Center for Lesbian Rights, which just Wednesday sought designation from the Tenth Circuit U.S. Court of Appeals to serve as co-counsel for same-sex couples on the state’s appeal of Shelby’s decision in Kitchen v. Herbert. “These couples are legally married, the state has been providing them with marital rights and protections, and it should continue to do so. There is no need for this kind of case-by-case review, and putting married couples and their families through this process is humiliating and will subject them to needless


uncertainty and legal vulnerability.” Jon Davidson, legal director for Lambda Legal, which has a number of marriage equality lawsuits in the works, including one in the Ninth Circuit, said he believes “couples who married prior to the stay remain married.” “They validly married pursuant to the law at the time they married, given that a court order allowed them to marry then,” Davidson said. But, he added, with the injunction against enforcement of the ban now stayed by the U.S. Supreme Court, “there is no court order preventing what the AG is suggesting be done.” “Any couple whose marriage is denied recognition by the state would have a claim that refusing to honor their marriage violates their constitutional rights, however, and I believe it would be a strong claim, given the vested property rights and reliance interest that couples who lawfully marry in a state have that their marriage will be respected,” Davidson said. “Accordingly, if the state does refuse to honor their marriage, it may be facing additional litigation.” Human Rights Campaign President Chad Griffin said Attorney General Reyes’ action “harms hundreds of Utah families and denies them the respect and basic protections that they deserve as legally married couples.” A private law firm, Magleby & Greenwood, is representing same-sex couples who initiated the Kitchen v. Herbert lawsuit in Utah. —Lisa Keen is a well-known, well-respected and award-winning gay journalist who spent 18 years as editor of the Washington Blade. See more news from Keen and other select veteran gay journalists at



GAY SAN DIEGO Jan. 10–23, 2014


CHORUS “They were there for us when we felt like we had nowhere to turn.” Opened in 1982, the facility was originally named the George G. Glenner Alzheimer Family Care Center, after its founder, a research pathologist who specialized in the disease. At the time, it was one of the first centers in the nation focused on people with dementia. Since then the name has been shortened to more accurately reflect the individuals it provides services to. Today, it still stands as one of the few places where adults with dementia can have quality, engaging day care with a structured program of art, crafts, dance and

other exercises, and also offers families an abundance of support and resources, too. “Dementia is blanket term for a host of brain disorders,” Saita said. “Alzheimer’s is one form of dementia and the most common form. In the public vernacular, they are treated the same. Back in the day it was called ‘senile’ and that word has gone away.” The Glenner is run by CEO Anette Asher, a small administrative staff at their corporate offices in Hillcrest, an 18-strong board of directors, and a 33-member advisory council made up of medical professionals. In addition, its three adult day care centers — Hillcrest, Chula Vista and Encinitas — each have their own program director, staff and a host of interns and volunteers. There is a one-to-five patient-to-staff ratio, which ensures

each participant gets the one-onone support they need. Saita said current research shows that at age 65 you have a one in eight chance to develop dementia. That number goes to one in two by age 85, and at 95, she said everyone basically has it but you may outlive any developing symptoms. “Adult day care in general is not very well known,” Saita said. “People think they need to pay for in home care or put them in a residential facility — this is an in between step that can help alleviate issues, challenges, and stress associated with the disease while improving quality of life for everyone in the household.” “They are only here for the day,” Asher chimed in. “They go home every night and they live at home. These generations, they want to live and die in their own home.” As an affordable alternative to live-in facilities where family interaction is often limited, Glenner offers the adult with dementia a safe place to socialize and keep active during the day, while giving the caretaker a guilt-free and necessary respite from 24-hour care. “At some point if your parents live long enough the roles reverse and the child takes care of the parent, very much the same way the parent once took care of the child; changing diapers, making sure that they eat, fighting with them to eat, making sure they don’t watch too much TV, making sure they go to bed on time, and that they stay in bed,” Satia said. The Hillcrest care facility is known as “the little blue house,” and staff say it looks that way both inside and out on purpose, to eliminate the “institutional” appearance and to make it feel like a participant’s second home. Board member Dawn Egan got fully engaged with the organization

his mind quite a bit,” she said. The Glenner staff all emphasize that mental stimulation is very important for patients with Alzheimer’s. “There was a huge digression of [my dad’s] disease and it brought him back around for a while,” Egan said. “It also kept him knowing who we were and he maintained that until the end and that is astounding.” Egan also explained how the interaction and socialization her father received at The Glenner actually helped him become more interactive with his own family and grandchildren, and he began looking forward to their visits rather than isolating himself once they arrived. Weekly family support groups are offered for free at The Glenner, with free adult day care also available during the 1 1/2 hour session so that caregivers don’t have to be separated from their loved ones. These weekly sessions not only give the family

The “little blue house” in Hillcrest, where all the magic happens. (Photo by Hutton Marshall)

A cache of items donated by SDGMC for the adult daycare center. (Courtesy The Glenner Memory and Care Centers)

after seeing the impact the center had on her father, whom she took care of for 17 years. Through her involvement on the board, she now acts as a personal experience ambassador, sharing her their story. “Having Dad attend the Glenner actually gave him more life,” Egan said. “He was in that mode of sitting in front of the TV and he wouldn’t do anything else, no matter what I suggested.” Egan, who is also a member of the GSDBA, said The Glenner also helped her father find a love for drawing, something no one in the family had ever seen him participate in. “He passed [early last year] and now I have a stack of sketchbooks that he began in January of 2008,” she said. “While it was a battle from time to time to get him here, once he got here he became engaged and it actually stimulated

and caregiver a place to relax and share their stories, they will learn more about the disease and receive tools for enhancing care. “You have to learn how to step into their world,” Egan said. “You can’t fix them, you can’t change this, and you have to figure out how to make it easy not only for them, but yourself. I will never forget this place and Marge Galante [Hillcrest program director] was a god send.” Asher said The Glenner used to have an annual gala, but changed their fundraising methods in 2013 to free up staff and funds and to focus on ways to better engage the participants and their families in the fundraising process. In 2014 they plan to hold a number of events throughout the year that will be open to the general public. For more information or to donate, visit


Manscaping 101: Here, there and everywhere Ben Cartwright | GSD Reporter


Codependence: When friendship goes bad

neck … and then he started talking about his wife ... and kids ... I had never had a straight razor put to my face, but he gave me an incredibly clean, precision shave without any cuts, nicks, or pain. I came out of it with a very nice shave and felt very fresh and clean. The shop was bright, clean, and very hip, and I certainly will return again!

up the appointment for me didn’t mention whether or not I would I love my hair. be serviced by a man or woman — While I’ve always put a great and I was afraid to ask. amount of effort into the hair on When I arrived for my apmy head, it was only recently that pointment, a very friendly woman, I started letting my facial hair Sarah, came out to greet me and grow out. Beyond that, I’ve also took me into the waxing room. I had the opportunity now and then immediately texted a friend to say to try out a “manscaping” session that I was petrified. with a Brazilian wax. A Brazilian wax, especially for It’s a new year, and since someone who hasn’t had one men certainly should keep done in a while, is already a themselves freshly groomed — painful experience. My initial from head to toe — every day, reaction to having to lay on here are some reviews of three a table buck-naked while a people who have taken care of woman examined every inch every inch of my hair over the of my lower region seemed last month. even more painful! Face – Mister Brown’s: The Luckily, Sarah was incredhair on my face takes time to ibly professional and kind, and grow into anything significant. within minutes had me feeling Otherwise, it grows in pretty comfortable. After all, she was light-colored, so unless it’s only interested in making my been growing for a while, it’s genital area look as fabulous hard to notice anything. In as possible, and she tried to honor of Movember, I pretty minimize the physical pain as Cartwright gets a straight-razor shave at much let it grow out through much as possible, too. Mister Brown’s. (Courtesy Be Social PR) the month of November and She used all organic prodinto December, with only minor ucts and always warned me home clean-ups and developed a Mister Brown’s is located at before pulling the wax strip. When pretty full face of hair. 3064 University Ave. in North Park. we were done, Sarah gave me On Dec. 19, I had the opportuDown there – Beauty By Dolly: instructions on how to take care nity to attend the grand opening While I prefer to keep my area of my skin in the days following to celebration for the new Mister “down there” trimmed and clean, avoid infection or break out and I Brown’s, a sophisticated men’s I usually do it myself and the last walked out happy and fresh (albiet barber, shop, and social. This hip couple of grooming services I slightly red). new spot provides cuts, shaves had there were performed by Sarah said that she really and space for private events, and men, never before has a woman enjoys what she does and likes provides a modern twist on the handled my private parts. And by making people feel better about barbershops of yesteryear. that, I mean I am what they call a themselves. She particularly When it was my turn, I was put “Gold Star Gay” — no woman has enjoys waxing men and said that into a reclining chair and a very ever ventured into that region of all men, even those who are really handsome man came to provide my body in any way. hairy, are welcome in her salon. my service. He was incredibly Naturally, I was quite frightened She said she really likes to sweet and I enjoyed him putting about my visit to Beauty By Dolly. see Manscaping, pg 7 his soft hands all over my face and The representative who set

GAY SAN DIEGO Jan. 10–23, 2014

MICHAEL KIMMEL LIFE BEYOND THERAPY Dear Michael, For several years I was friends with someone. He ended it abruptly and refuses to talk to me. It’s no problem with me that he ended the friendship, but it’s been almost a year now and he’s still angry and hateful to me. Every chance he gets he says untrue things about me to anyone who will listen. How can I get him to move on with his life? The weird thing is that I still care about him and feel like this is killing him. Confused in North Park Dear Confused, I can appreciate your concern about your former friend, but the bottom line is that it isn’t your problem. If it’s “no problem” for you that the friendship is over, why do you ask, “How can I get him to move on with his life?” It sounds to me that you

assume you have the power to make him move on with his life. Saying “I feel like this is killing him,” is focusing way too much on him; where are you in all of this? From your email, it sounds to me like you have an inability to let go of him. It’s great to be kind to people, but it sounds like you still feel responsible for him. This is the essence of codependence, behavior and feelings that go beyond healthy ideas of friendship and other relationships. In my private practice, I’ve noticed that codependent people are more likely to attract abuse from aggressive individuals, more likely to stay in stressful jobs or relationships, less likely to seek medical attention when needed, less likely to ask for (and get) promotions, and tend to earn less money than those without codependency patterns. I know it sounds pretty bad, but don’t give up hope. All of us have a bit of codependence in us, and putting your friends’ needs before your own occasionally is part of a healthy friendship. But putting your friends’ needs before your own repeatedly is a sign of codependence. None of us have any control over what our friends do; we only have control over what we do. If you have codependent tendencies, notice them and be willing to change, e.g, take a look at your relationship with your former friend: if he’s harassing you, you can talk with a lawyer and get a Temporary Restraining Order (TRO) if that’s appropriate. If he’s slandering you, you can consider legal action. But if he’s doing neither of these things and is simply a very unhappy person, then stop trying to

see Codependence, pg 14



GAY SAN DIEGO Jan. 10–23, 2014


A New Year’s message from the Interim Mayor


A controversy fueled on the back of LGBT rights By Melanie Peters “There’s no such thing as bad publicity except for your own funeral.” —Brendan Behan, Irish poet and author Recently, the A&E Network launched a massive PR campaign, largely contributing to it’s 10 percent overall boost in ratings in the last half of 2013. “The Hollywood Reporter” claims that Duck Dynasty was only rivaled by The Walking Dead and the NFL as the top rated shows on cable in the adults 18-49 and adults 25-54 demographics. Obviously the show’s appeal is a novel one at best. I have glanced past the show in the past, just long enough to squint and scratch my head at the concept of making a television program out of a company that makes duck call devices. I am no stranger to the loose concepts of reality TV-making, having made one myself out of touring the country with my former music and life partner. I know absurdity sells, and conflict makes for exciting viewing. I, however, like many others around the edges of our beloved country, never paid it much attention. And when the fake controversy started brewing about what the patriarch of the family Phil Robertson had said in a GQ inter view (shame on GQ for letting that happen in the first place), I still didn’t pay it much attention. It was when it blew up on social media and other areas, and it kept going, .... and going, that I was prompted to read what had been said. It’s so not important what he said, it’s why anyone cared that made me have concern. Has it really come to this America? Do we rely so much on social media posts to tell us what news is that we no longer know when we are being marketed to? You have been tricked, duped and swindled. Your time has been taken, morals insulted, and your opinions nullified by this campaign. In our own defense, we were

the easiest target, and the fattest. With 17 US states now holding legal gay weddings, the repeal of DOMA, the popularity of gay characters on prime time network television programs, and the simple fact that we gays are everywhere and so less closeted that ever before in history, we were as ripe and plump for the picking as Violet Beauregarde [of Willy Wonka fame]. The makings of a fake controversy were ready for the PR pie. Fake PR pie recipe: Take LGBT rights progress, add a rich and popular redneck from Louisiana, stir in a struggling irrelevant cable network, add two dashes of homophobia, a good PR guy, and stir. Just a few short weeks after A&E canned Phil from the show for his comments, he was miraculously reinstated after what was reported as a massive outrage by fans. I signed no petition, did you? No of course not, we were only the pawns in the game. If we tweeted about it, or posted a link on our Facebook page about our outrage, that was enough; it was also enough for A&E and the Robertsons to cash in. And if you tuned in, tweeted, or status updated, even for a second, they won. In a recent Forbes inter view, Willie Robertson (Phil’s son) said, “We sold 50,000 duck calls [in 2012], in 2013 we sold 1 million.” The family has a new Duck Dynasty gun line coming out, a Duck Dynasty cammo ATV, Duck Dynasty bedding and even their own chia pet. In case you did not know it, A&E and the Robertson family are marketing geniuses, at our expense, of course.


ACCOUNTING Priscilla Umel-Martinez (619) 961-1962

EDITOR Morgan M. Hurley (619) 961-1960

ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Sloan Gomez (619) 961-1954


ASSISTANT EDITOR Hutton Marshall (619) 961-1952

Patrick Hammond (619) 961-1956

PRODUCTION ASSISTANT Vincent Meehan (619) 961-1961

Sincerely, Todd Gloria, Interim Mayort


—Melanie Peters is a PR professional and owns Melanie Peters Productions, a web development, video and social media-marketing firm. She is also a board member of the GSDBA and South Bay Pride’s chair of marketing. She can be reached at

PUBLISHER David Mannis (619) 961-1951

ART DIRECTOR Rebecah Corbin (619) 961-1961

Dear Friends, As we begin 2014 with resolutions, renewal, and hope for great things in the months ahead, I am happy to report the City’s forecast looks bright. Late last year, I released the City’s Five-Year Financial Outlook. The financial forecast for fiscal years 2015 through 2019 includes critical information as the City Council and members of the public begin to formulate priorities for the FY 2015 budget, which will be considered in spring 2014. The “Outlook” projects a one-year baseline budget deficit of approximately $19 million for FY 15, followed by surpluses through FY 19. I fully expect we will be able to overcome the projected FY 2015 deficit without sacrificing needed ser vices, thanks in part to higher than anticipated property tax revenues. With smart decision making, the City of San Diego will have a balanced budget for fiscal year 2015. This is good news. That being said, as Interim Mayor and Council President, my primar y focus in 2014 will be on our City’s infrastructure. The City currently has a backlog of deferred capital projects with a price tag of at least $898 million. These capital projects include sidewalks, streets, streetlights, fire stations, storm drains, parks, and libraries. This month, my council colleagues and I will be voting on a $120 million infrastructure bond that includes over $43 million earmarked for street resurfacing. The passage of this proposed bond at council would be a step in the right direction. However, to be America’s Finest City and remain economically competitive, we must continue to work together to develop solutions on how we will pay for the remaining infrastructure upgrades. Councilmember Mark Kersey, chair of the City Council’s Infrastructure Committee, has done an excellent job leading this charge. Last year, he kicked off a series of community workshops to solicit input from residents on what kinds of improvements they would like to see in their neighborhoods. I look for ward to continuing to work with and support Councilmember Kersey in this role. If you tweet, you can follow the City’s infrastructure conversation on Twitter – #RebuildSD. While we start 2014 with good news about the City’s financial outlook, I am up to the challenge of addressing our infrastructure needs, and welcome your input on what infrastructure improvements make sense for San Diego. Please email me at toddgloria@ Finally, I invite you to join me at the State of the City Address on Januar y 15 at 6 p.m. at the Balboa Theatre Downtown. Come and learn about the progress we’ve made so far and what we can accomplish together in this new year. I hope your 2014 is filled with great health and good fortune. As always, thank you for the opportunity to ser ve.

Mike Rosensteel (619) 961-1958

Jerry Kulpa (619) 961-1964 Yana Shayne (619) 961-1963

Charlene Baldridge Blake Beckcom Gwen Beckcom Ben Cartwright Lisa Keen Michael Kimmel Ian Morton Jeff Praught Caleb Rainey Frank Sabatini Jr. Romeo San Vincente

WEB DESIGN Kim Espinoza

OPINIONS/LETTERS Gay San Diego encourages letters to the editor and guest editorials. Please email both to Include phone number and address for verification. We reserve the right to edit letters and editorials for brevity and accuracy. Letters should be no longer than 350 words in length unless approved by staff editors. Letters and guest editorials do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher or staff. SUBMISSIONS/NEWS TIPS Press releases and story ideas are welcome. Send press releases, tips, photos or story ideas to For breaking news and investigative story ideas contact the editor by phone or email. DISTRIBUTION GAY San Diego is distributed free, biweekly, every other Friday. COPYRIGHT 2013. All rights are reserved.

Well-deserved award … congratulations Vicky [see Vol. 4, Issue 26, ”Vicki Sanchez: Our 2013 A. Brad Truax Award Winner”]. — Carmen Gutierrez, via Very exciting and needed [see Vol. 4, Issue, 26, ”An opportunity to live with dignity”]! I am 61 and my partner is 70. Both of us are still working; I am working full-time, Lee part-time. We are part of an intentional community that is considering cohabitating or at least living in close proximity to each other. This, too, is a very interesting idea and sorely needed! Certainly want to keep it as an option for my partner and me! —Joseph Jeffers, via gay-sd.comt

3737 Fifth Ave. Suite 201 San Diego, CA 92103 (619) 519-7775 Twitter: @GaySD

Business Improvement Association


GAY NEWS BRIEFS REBRANDED MARDI GRAS ANNOUNCES NEW LOCATION The Hillcrest Business Association (HBA) and the GSDBA Charitable Foundation announced the Hillcrest Mardi Gras will take place on March 4 in its rebranded form as “Hillcrest Fat Tuesday.” The celebration will begin with a parade of floats beginning on Park Blvd., continuing down University Avenue and ending on Tenth Avenue, where the other festivities will take place. Originally created to raise money for college scholarships for LGBT students, this year the proceeds will be divided between HBA and the GSDBA Charitable Foundation, which will use the funds for LGBT scholarships that will be presented to students in conjunction with the HBA. SAN DIEGO MAYORAL DEBATES SOLIDIFIED As the Feb. 11 runoff election date nears, councilmembers and mayoral hopefuls Kevin Faulconer and David Alvarez have agreed to participate in six debates from Jan. 15 to Jan. 31. Each will be broadcasted and moderated by a San Diego media outlet and will be cohosted by local community associations, although the organizations paired with the media outlets have yet to be finalized. The mayoral debate schedule is as follows: Wednesday, Jan. 15, 1 p.m.: hosted by KGTV 10 News (Channel 10) and KPBS News (89.5 FM/Channel 11); Jan. 17, 2:30 p.m. taping, broadcast time TBD: hosted by KUSI News (Channel 9, 51); Jan. 23, 6 p.m.: hosted by NBC 7 San Diego (Channel 7/39); Jan. 26, 9 p.m.: hosted by San Diego 6 the CW (Channel 6); Jan. 30, 11 a.m.: hosted by KFMB (760 AM and Channel 8); Jan. 31, 6 p.m.: hosted by Univision San Diego (Channel 17). The nine community associations in the process of partnering with a media host are Educate for the Future and the Cesar Chavez Service Clubs, Livable Streets Coalition, Mid-City Community Advocacy Network Youth Council, San Diego Center for the Blind, San Diego and Imperial Counties Labor Council, San Diego Regional Chamber of Commerce, San Diego Society of Professional Journalists, Senior Community Centers San Diego, and the Veterans Museum. LOCAL LGBT GROUPS TO RALLY SUPPORT FOR TRANSGENDER STUDENT BILL Following an effort by anti-LGBT organizations to gather signatures for a November referendum to repeal Assembly Bill 1266, a recently passed law guaranteeing equal rights and

fair treatment of transgender students, Canvass for a Cause and other local LGBT organizations will rally in Hillcrest on Jan. 11 at 4 p.m. to build community support to take action to protect transgender youth. SAME Alliance and Black and Pink San Diego will join Canvass for a Cause to hold a “Return of the Rally to Defend Trans* Rights” at Sixth and University avenues. Participants are encouraged to bring signs and flags, and to wear pink, blue or white in solidarity with the transgender community. “It is essential that we plan now for the possibility that this important law might be repealed in November,” said LC Carmack, lead canvass coordinator at Canvass for a Cause. “It is our job as an LGBT organization to protect our most vulnerable students.” For more information, contact Holly Hellerstedt at 951-486-1613 or at holly@ MLK DAY OF SERVICE TO SERVE LGBT HOMELESS YOUTH The Human Rights Campaign and San Diego Youth Services invite San Diegans to come together on MLK Day of Service to assemble care packages for LGBT homeless youth. A particularly vulnerable demographic, LGBT youth make up as much as 40 percent of homeless and at-risk youth. Volunteers are asked to help assemble the care bags at Hess Brewery on Jan. 19 from 12 – 4 p.m., or to help collect the items going into the care bags. Items urgently needed by LGBT homeless youth include new and unused thick socks and underwear; unopened travel-sized toiletries including toothbrushes, feminine hygiene products, dental floss, chapstick, lotion, and wet wipes; hats and gloves; buss passes; and batteries. HRC requests these items be labeled “MLK DOS” and dropped off at Hess Brewery during the hours listed above. Hess Brewery is located at 3158 Grimm St., in North Park. For additional ways to participate, contact or visit CRENSHAW SUES COLE FOR DEFAMATION Former District 4 city council candidate Dwayne Crenshaw filed a lawsuit at the beginning of the month against Councilmember Myrtle Cole for defamation, citing a campaign mailer Cole sent out during their close race for the District 4 seat vacated by former Council President Tony Young. The mailer alleged that Crenshaw was involved in an illegal drug deal outside of a crack house during his time as a Associated Students President at San Diego State two decades earlier. Several publications and the police officer on the scene have revealed the mailer — which was also used against Crenshaw in a 2000 campaign that Cole managed — to be intentionally misleading. Crenshaw seeks an unspecified amount in damages, which includes lost wages, legal fees, loss of reputation, mental and physical pain, and anguish.t

GAY SAN DIEGO Jan. 10–23, 2014



MANSCAPING clean guys up and when she waxes extra hairy chests and backs, she feels like a “waxing ninja.” So if you’re looking to clean up those hair y areas this year, I highly recommend the team at Beauty By Dolly! Beauty By Dolly is located at 3650 Fifth Ave., Ste. 101, in Hillcrest. Hair – Patrick Gibson at Autumn Houston, The Salon: I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention the person who has kept the hair on my head looking fantastic for the last year and a half. I’ve followed Patrick to his most recent salon, Autumn Houston, The Salon, and it has only elevated the experience. Walking into an appointment with Patrick, my day is brightened as I’m typically greeted with a “hello, handsome,” a hug, and an offer of a beverage of my choice. Patrick makes me feel comfortable throughout the entire appointment and is always responsive to my needs. In fact, he helped me transition from my 7-year long affair with my “faux hawk” style that needed to go. Patrick is adorable, fabulous, and extra talented. He specializes in both men’s and women’s cuts and is ready to make you beautiful! Autumn Houston, The Salon is located at 1760 Kettner Blvd. in Little Italy. Ben Cartwright is a freelance writer and community activist. He can be reached at

Cartwright post-shave (Courtesy Be Social PR)


GAY SAN DIEGO Jan. 10–23, 2014





ipe North Park is the kind of produce market that makes you feel as though you’ve walked into a gorgeous salad. It’s where tidy displays of locally grown lettuces, icicle radishes and multi-colored carrots leave customers pondering their favorite vinaigrettes. An order counter for prepared deli foods resides in the back of the store, although the sprightly salads you expect to see listed on the menu are strangely missing. Surely, they’d sell like crazy in the face of such picture-perfect produce worthy of Whole Foods. The offerings instead point to acai bowls, hearty soups and hefty sandwiches, the latter of which are garnished with various organics like frilly greens from City College’s agriculture lots, plump tomatoes from a Carlsbad farm and Haas avocados that a Ramona grower has continued harvesting in to the winter season. No iceberg lettuce and anemic Romas come between your bread here – just maximumfresh veggies and filler-free meats and cheeses from Boar’s Head. The market is located within a residential patch of North Park called “T-32” that feels much like South Park. It’s flanked by a boutique and nursery. Around the corner is the Thorn Street Brewery while across the street is Santos Coffee House and a crafts studio, leaving this quaint intersection of Thorn and 32nd streets ripe for Ripe. Glenn Kessell and his wife, Jami, took over the space more than a year ago, adding a front patio stocked with tables, umbrellas, free WiFi and a flat screen. It oper-

to sandwich

ated previously as a similar market, but without the panache that appeals to die-hard locavores. A few of the shelves are also occupied by nuts, honeys and San Diegoproduced jams. Winking at us from a front ledge were baskets brimming with big, luscious strawberries from a farm in Vista. Given their rarity in December, we purchased a pint as a sweet appetizer while awaiting our food. Both the homemade chili (Glenn’s recipe) and turkey noodle soup (Jami’s recipe) were sold out, so we tried the Boar’s Head chicken pot pie soup, which tasted fiercely comforting despite its thick, commercial-like consistency. Other soup choices by Boar’s Head were tomato-basil and Angus & cheddar. A lengthy list of meats, cheeses and condiments are for the choosing when opting to build your own sandwich. Ditto for the breads, which include everything from multi-grain and squaw to sourdough and French rolls, all supplied by California Baking Company. Visiting as a foursome, we each chose specialty sandwiches that have been tried and tested, such as the top-selling chipotle chicken on squaw bread, which combines wheat and rye. Each bite packed generous mouthfuls of the deli-style chicken breast, plus havarti cheese, bacon, leafy dark-green lettuce, juicy tomatoes and sweet red onions. Cajun mayo sealed the deal.

3302 32nd St.


619-876-4647 Prices: Soups and chili, $2.75 to $5.99; sandwiches $6.89 to $8.49

Dining with


The Italian submarine featured the bonus of prosciutto layered among the classics: mortadella, ham, capicola, salami and Provolone. The organic garnishments were moistened with a gentle dousing of oil and vinegar, although the friend who ordered the sandwich requested a side of mayo after the first bite, admitting that he can’t do without it on Italian subs. I have to agree; the messier the better. Ironically, the most devoted carnivore in our group became especially swept up by the store’s produce selection and ended up ordering the “veggie delight” sandwich. Hummus served as the condiment for a stacking of frizzy sunflower sprouts, Haas avocado and the expected lettuce, toma tomatoes, cucumbers and onions. He left a happy camper. I ordered the Italian beef, which was technically a swooped-up roast beef sandwich with pepperoncini-tomato relish and melted Provolone. Though savory and highly satisfying, its lack of giardiniera (pickled cauliflower, carrots and peppers) and the additions of yellow mustard and mayo would send any Chicagoan I know into a tizzy. Also missing from the scheme were the classic meat drippings achieved from slow roasting the beef in oregano and onion powder before it’s sliced. Because one of our sandwich orders was initially overlooked and slow to arrive, we were given a few whiskey-caramel truffles from Andrea’s Truffles, a local vendor that understands the thrill of chocolate melting on your tongue before it passes your throat. “We always give them out when there’s a screw up,” said Jami, adding that the store carries the truffles in a few other flavors as well. Ripe is not only an enjoyable place to shop for filling up your vegetable bin, but it offers a relax relaxing, hospitable environment for idling over sandwiches, fruits and candies that essentially support more than a dozen local purveyors – kind of like a quiet farmers market, but with the outdoor seating you wish for.t

(top to bottom) Chipotle chicken sandwich; a half veggie sandwich and chicken pot pie soup; Italian sub with prosciutto (Photos by Frank Sabatini Jr.) FROM PAGE 1

OPERA most parodied operas. Say what you will: it is luscious. Directed by Andrew Sinclair, the “Pagliacci” company includes American tenor Frank Poretta as Silvio, Romanian soprano Adina Nitescu as Nedda, American baritones David Adam Moore as Silvio, and Stephen Powell as Tonio. Franco-Canadian Yves Abel conducts the San Diego Symphony. The opera is sung in Italian with English supertitles. Additional performances: 7 p.m. Jan. 28 and Jan. 31 and 2 p.m. Sunday, Feb 2. Also featuring an international company, Gaetano Donizetti’s comical “The Elixir of Love” follows February 15, 18, 21 and 23. Moldovan soprano Tatiana Lisnic portrays Adina, a wealthy young woman beloved of Nemorino, Italian tenor Giuseppe Filianoti, who takes the magic elixir touted by Dr. Belcore, who is portrayed by the great American buffo bass-baritone John Del Carlo, who sings regularly with the Metropolitan Opera and made his SDO debut in 1978. Others in the company are American baritone Malcolm MacKenzie and San Diego-raised soprano Stephanie Weiss. Karen Kamensek conducts and Stephen Lawless directs. Giuseppe Verdi’s less familiar and wondrous “A Masked Ball” plays March 8, 11, 14 and 18. It stars riveting Polish tenor Piotr Beczala, also a Metropolitan Opera regular, in his first return since debuting here in La bohème. He sings the role of Swedish King Gustav III, beloved of Amelia Anckarström (Bulgarian soprano Krassimira Stoyanova, referred to as “the Stradivarius of sopranos”), who is the faithful wife of Count Anckarström (Greek baritone Aris Argiris). In her SDO debut, extraordinary American mezzo-soprano Stephanie Blythe portrays Mme. Arvidson and Korean-American soprano Kathleen Kim debuts in the trouser role of Oscar. Massimo Zanetti conducts and Lesley Koenig directs. April 5, 8, 11 and 13 mark the return of


GAY SAN DIEGO Jan. 10–23, 2014


the popular SDO production of Jules Massenet’s “Don Quixote,” once again a vehicle for the amazing acting and vocal talents of renowned Italian bass Ferruccio Furlanetto. Argentinean bass-baritone Eduardo Chama returns to charm audiences as Sancho Panza, and German mezzo-soprano Anke Vondung makes her role debut as Dulcinea for the first time. Karen Keltner conducts, Keturah Stickann directs, and Kristina Cobarrubia is the choreographer. It’s a far cry from and ever so much deeper than the familiar Broadway musical. This season’s not-to-be-missed event is a single performance of Giuseppe Verdi’s “Requiem” at 7 p.m. March 20. At press time, fewer than 200 seats remained, so hurry on this one if you wish to partake in what’s bound to be a fine performance by Stoyanova, Beczala, Furlanetto and Blythe. Conducted by Zanetti, the “Requiem” features the San Diego Opera Chorus, the San Diego Master Chorale and San Diego Symphony. The really good news, according to General/Artistic Director Director Ian Campbell, is as follows: “We’ve got some great operas this year and some extraordinary singers. Opera in the cinema may be grand, but when you come to the Civic Theatre you get to watch the singer you want to watch, not the shot determined by a director. Aurally and visually, opera in the opera house is a totally different experience.” For further information regarding the singers, conductors and productions, to hear excerpts, and to purchase single or season tickets, go to or phone 619533-7000. Single tickets range from $45 to $200. Some sections are sold out, so hurry. Charlene Baldridge moved to San Diego from the Chicago area in 1962. She’s been writing about the arts since 1979, and has had her features, critiques, surveys and interviews included in various publications ever since. Her book “San Diego, Jewel of the California Coast” (Northland Publishing) is currently available in bookstores. She can be reached at

(Clockwise, from top) Cast members of Gaetano Donizetti’s “The Elixir of Love” (Photo by Robert Jules Massenet’s “Don Quixote” (Photo by Cory Weaver); and Ruggero Leoncavallo’s Pagliacci (Photo by Ken Howard) join the San Diego Opera season.




Opens January 25!

JANUARY 25, 28, 31, FEBRUARY 2 Riveting and gut-wrenching, experience this love triangle that ends in murder before an audience who think they are viewing a comedy. This one-act opera packs more bite and intensity than operas twice as long! Tickets start at $45. (619) 533-7000

English translations displayed above the stage. All performances at the San Diego Civic Theatre.


GAY SAN DIEGO Jan. 10–23, 2014

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GAY SAN DIEGO Jan. 10–23, 2014

Cruise Planners

Villa Mykonos

Dave Fowlie is the owner of Cruise Planners – Vacations by Dave, a full-service travel agency (a franchise of Cruise Planners – American Express Travel, an award-winning national cruise and travel franchise company). Dave offers an amazing array of LGBT travel packages and services, be it same-sex destination weddings or honeymoons, LGBT adventure tours such as white-water rafting the Colorado River, cultural tours of Europe, exotic destination tours such as Machu Picchu or Antarctica, and of course LGBT cruises. There are so many exciting LGBT trips to choose from. It has never been a better time to travel. Dave will work with you to match your interests to a vacation experience of your dreams or even customize a trip just for you. In addition, as an American Express Travel Services Representative agency, Dave can offer exclusive American Express benefits such as Mariner Club and the AMEX Group Program as well as other American Express Card services such as Cruise Privilege, Destination Family and Pay With Points. Cruise Planners – Vacations by Dave is a proud member of the IGLTA (International Gay and Lesbian Travel Association), CLIA (Cruise Line International Association), and NACTA (National Association of Career Travel Agents. For more information, contact Dave Fowlie at 619-339-1798 or visit or

Need a getaway from everyday life? Villa Mykonos is a premiere desert resort that caters to LGBT travelers. With large, upscale accommodations, Villa Mykonos has ten 1500 square feet villas that feature dual master suites and luxurious bathrooms in each home. Each villa has at least one patio and a detached garage. The property also includes a large pool, spa and BBQ island – allowing you to entertain and mingle with other guests. All Villa Mykonos units are appointed with modern coordinated furnishings, king beds and complete kitchens. The interior of all units are smoke free, though smoking is permitted in all outdoor areas. Beloved pets are not forgotten at Villa Mykonos, because pet-friendly units are also available. Villa Mykonos rentals are extremely cost-competitive when compared to similar caliber hotels. You gain the benefit of a full kitchen and living areas that sleep four or five people when you choose resort living over a hotel. As a Mediterranean style resort, Villa Mykonos is located in Cathedral City, between Palm Springs and Palm Desert. The desert climate makes Villa Mykonos an ideal warm-weather vacation destination year-round, and the proximity to San Diego and Los Angeles make it a convenient weekend getaway. Book your escape today!

619-339-1798 |

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Wedding Announcements: GARWOOD


Surrounded by dozens of well wishers, Uptown community activists Ann M. Garwood and Nancy A. Moors joined their hands in marriage on Oct. 20 at 1 p.m. at their home The Meadows on Maple Canyon in Bankers Hill. Standing up for the couple was Mike Wright and Nancy’s son Dustin Moors, with longtime friend Susan Fosselman officiating the loving

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ceremony. The 90-year-old mothers of both brides were also in attendance, as were six of their nine grandchildren. Lots of champagne and a three-layer cake immediately followed the wedding, with music and dancing throughout the afternoon provided by Laura Jane Willcock with a personalized songlist provided by the brides. “Lots of bubbles, happy people, laughter and conversation made the day perfect,” the brides said.

Wedding Announcements Let our readers know about your engagement, wedding or anniversary! To place your ad call:

Mike Rosensteel (619) 961-1958 or email Mike at:



GAY SAN DIEGO Jan. 10–23, 2014

Friday, January 10

SUE PALMER AND CANDYE KANE: Don’t miss the Queen of Boogie Woogie as she takes the stage with the Blues Diva and her full band tonight at 9:00 p.m. to midnight at Tio Leo’s. You get two for the price of one and its only $7. Tio Leo’s Lounge, 5302 Napa St. For more info, visit

Saturday, January 11

FILMOUT SCREENING: Come join other movie buffs for the feature-length film, “Free Fall,” directed by Stephan Lacant. Also shown is short film “Squared,” by Director Hieu Tran, which was shot locally in San Diego. 7 – 10 p.m. Birch North Park Theatre, 2891 University Ave., North Park. For more info, visit LIGHT – AN ART EXHIBIT: Pop over to the San Diego Pride offices before the FilmOut movie or Ray at Night to catch this exhibition of 12 talented LGBT artists and their work. Part of the “Art of Pride” series, exhibition & reception 6 – 9 p.m. San Diego Pride offices, 3620 30th St., 619-297-7683. For a list of all the artists, visit

SDAFFL PUB CRAWL: Join the San Diego American Football League in their annual Pub Crawl fundraiser. For just $10 you can crawl across Hillcrest with members of the league and get an official T-shirt. Starts at Uptown Tavern at 1 p.m. and includes Hillcrest Brewing Company, Gossip Grill, Flicks, Babycakes, Fiesta Cantina and Urban MO’s. 1236 University Ave. For more info, visit

Sunday, January 12

HILLCREST FARMERS’ MARKET: Every Sunday from 9 a.m. to 2 p.m. on Normal Street between Lincoln and University (near the DMV) enjoy 125 of the finest vendors a market can offer. For more info, visit hillcrestbia. org or call 619-299-3330. PAINTING AND VINO: Local professional artists instruct attendees on painting a masterpiece. Tonight – two locations: (1) “Coffee & Conversation” at 98 Bottles in Little Italy, 2400 Kettner Blvd., Suite #110, 1–4 p.m., (2) “Fire Sky” at Jakes on Sixth Wine Bar, 3755 Sixth Ave., Hillcrest, 5 – 8 p.m. Both events are 21+up. Cost is $45, all supplies included, but registration is required. Visit SHOWTUNE SUNDAYS: Hosted by Babette Schwartz and the Divettes, this “bite of the Big Apple” will give you a little Broadway, some showtunes, musicals and more. 7 – 10 p.m. Lips San Diego, located at 3036 El Cajon Blvd. Visit

Monday, January 13

YOGA FOR EVERYONE: Wanting to try yoga in the new year but afraid to start? Check out this

weekly free basic yoga class at The Center, taught by Tim Schultheis. Options available for the more advanced. 10:30 – 11:30 a.m.

Tuesday, January 14

LESBIAN MEET-UP: New weekly early morning business networking meeting, offering a chance to share and support each other’s business or passions. All lesbians in community are invited. 7:30 – 8:30 a.m. Caffe Calabria, 3933 30th St., North Park. PAINTING AND VINO: Local professional artists instruct attendees on painting a masterpiece. Tonight – Van Gogh’s “Starry Night over Rhone” at 98 Bottles in Little Italy, 2400 Kettner Blvd., Suite #110. Event is 6 – 9 p.m. and is 21+up. Cost is $45, all supplies included, but registration is required.

Wednesday, January 15

PICTIONARY: Come play with Tiger on the back patio. Match your skills, win fun prizes and raise money for a good causes. 7:30–10 p.m. #1 on Fifth Ave., 3845 Fifth Ave. DREAMGIRLS Revue is back: Every Wednesday join Chad Michaels and the entire DreamGirls, followed by DJs spinning dance music immediately after. 8 – 9:30 p.m., $ 7 cover. Urban Mo’s, 308 University Ave. Visit or call 619-491-0400.

Thursday, January 16

GSDBA SPEAKER LUNCHEON: A unique lunch to address topics pertinent to LGBT professionals and their allies. Guest speaker: Steven Borg, SVP and Corporate Marketing Director at California Bank and Trust.

Family-style lunch and beverage included. $25 pre-registration, $35 at the door. Wang’s North Park, 3029 University Ave. For more info, visit GSDBA NEW YEAR MIXER: Mix and mingle with other local business owners at the Greater San Diego Business Association’s first event of the new year. This will also be one of the last times you can enjoy Top of the Park before its closure. Enjoy food, beverages, socializing and breathtaking views. $15 members, $25 guests. 21+. 5:30 – 7 p.m. 525 Spruce St., Bankers Hill. For more info, visit

Friday, January 17

BEAR BRUNCH: Every first and third Saturday, join local cuddly bears at Harvey Milk’s American Diner from 8 a.m. to 2 p.m. 535 University Ave., in Hillcrest. For more info visit harveymilksamericandiner. com or call 619-295-2747. COMMUNITY CLEAN-UP: Do your part to help keep Hillcrest clean. Sponsored by the Hillcrest Town Council and UC San Diego Medical Center staff. Spend an hour or two and make your community cleaner, healthier and safer. Meet at 200 W. Arbor Dr. (UCSD’s ER entrance) at 9:30 a.m. All volunteers get refreshments and a free orange Hillcrest Clean T.E.A.M. (Together Everyone Achieves More) T-shirt. For more info, call 619-315-7058.

Sunday, January 19

RESTAURANT WEEK: This annual feast of San Diego restaurants allows you to try something new or return to your faves all at bargain Restaurant Week prices through Jan. 24. Special prix fixe

lunches and dinners are available, starting at $10. More infor, visit SHOWTUNE SUNDAYS: Hosted by Babette Schwartz and the Divettes, this “bite of the Big Apple” will give you a little Broadway, some showtunes, musicals and more. 7 – 10 p.m. Lips San Diego, located at 3036 El Cajon Blvd. Visit

Monday, January 20

MLK DAY OF SERVICE: Join the Human Rights Campaign (HRC) and San Diego Youth Services to make a difference for local LGBT homeless youth from 12 – 4 p.m. assembling all the donations into care packages for the homeless youth. Hess Brewery is located at 3158 Grimm St. For more information, visit

Tuesday, January 21

LESBIAN MEET-UP: New weekly early morning business networking meeting, offering a chance to share and support each other’s business or passions. All lesbians in community are invited. 7:30 – 8:30 a.m. Caffe Calabria, 3933 30th St., North Park.

Wednesday, January 22

ART FOR 50 OR BETTER: Tickle your shadow artist at this weekly fun and relaxed interactive art group led by Sabato Fiorello for those 50 and over. Learn new art forms, work on projects, explore different mediums. Bring pencils, paper, inexpensive watercolor paints and a brush. Try it first! The LGBT Center, 3909 Centre St., Hillcrest. For more info, visit

Thursday, January 23

LOCAL AUTHOR READING: If you have been touched by cancer in any form, you will want to hear Jody Sims read from her inspiring book, “Soul Provider: Conversations with my Cat.” A longtime member of our local LGBT community, she established many womenrelated events over last two decades before being stricken with stage-three breast cancer in 2012. While still in treatment, Sims enrolled in the Art Academy in North Park, resulting in 20 acrylic paintings and a process of emotional recovery showcased in the book. 5 p.m. Upstart Crow Bookstore & Coffee House, 835 W. Harbor Dr. in Seaport Village. For more info visit

For inclusion in the calendar, email


GAY SAN DIEGO Jan. 10–23, 2014


Tears of joy and sorrow in the sports world JEFF PRAUGHT DUGOUT CHATTER Goodness, last weekend was a remarkable weekend in sports. Four NFL games (three of which boasted fantastic finishes), a benchmark victor y for San Diego State’s men’s basketball team at Kansas, the tragic passing of local legend Jerr y Coleman and college football’s Bowl Championship Series title game made for an exhausting and emotional three-day period for us fans. Chargers upset Cincinnati The excitable fans of the San Diego Chargers — I know quite a few of them — deser ve something to be proud of. The team struggled to get into the playoffs at 9-7, and needed a lot of luck just to qualify. You may have noticed an amplified sense of excitement leading up to the game, one the Bolts were supposed to lose at heavily favored Cincinnati. Fans had several reasons to be jacked up: the team’s first playoff appearance in four seasons, an opponent that had not won a playoff game since 1990, a running game that has been dominating opponents in a way not seen around these parts since number 21 was running loose in the San Diego backfield. But I believe the biggest reason for the excitement — and subsequent explosion of emotion after the victor y — stems from the fatigue San Diego fans have felt over unrealized expectations. Letdown after letdown marred this franchise’s fan base since the 14-2 Chargers lost to New England in the 2006 playoffs. Widely thought to have the deepest and most talented roster in the NFL, Bolts fans were instead tormented with repeated failure. Frustrations grew during the Nor v Turner era. Fans directed their ire at Turner despite the fact that he was not behind the personnel decisions that left him tr ying to guide an offense fans assumed should be as good as that of the 2006 Chargers team. In short, fans have been tired. New head coach Mike McCoy guided a flawed team to the playoffs, giving San Diegans something to cheer about for the first time in forever. Cheering a playoff victor y surely felt like sweeping away toxic feelings of years past. They could finally move on. Can the Chargers win in Denver? Of course. They did in December, and they have the personnel to attack the Broncos’ weaknesses. A strong running game chews time off the clock and keeps the NFL’s highest-scoring offense in histor y on the sideline. Denver’s safeties stink, and Philip Rivers is a Top 5-caliber

quarterback capable of exploiting them. As long as the team scores touchdowns instead of field goals, they have a fighter’s chance in this game Sunday. Three other classic NFL Wild Card games Saturday of Wild Card Weekend was ridiculously entertaining. The Kansas CityIndianapolis game looked like a snoozer when the schedule came out. Instead, we were left with the second-largest comeback in NFL playoff histor y. The Chiefs blew a 38-10 third quarter lead, despite a career day from San Diego’s own Alex Smith (Helix High), as the Colts escaped with an epic 45-44 victor y. Indianapolis next faces Tom Brady and the Patriots in New England, where I would expect the Pats to advance easily. Former Charger Drew Brees has been spectacular for most of his career, but the one blemish on his record has been his inability to win on the road, especially in the playoffs. The Saints were winless in five such tries in their histor y, but thanks to the passing and, surprisingly, running of Brees, New Orleans managed to pull out a 26-24 victor y at Philadelphia. Their reward: a road game in the NFL’s loudest stadium against the mighty Seahawks. The Saints were humiliated 34-7 on Monday Night Football earlier this year in the ver y same venue, but I would not be at all surprised to see a completely different result this time. The 49ers and Packers put on a fantastic show in the frozen tundra at Lambeau Field, and for once, the moniker actually lived up to its billing. The field looked like an unwatered field in the middle of a desert, as the temperature at kickoff was a bone-chilling 5 degrees. Wind chills dropped to 20 below. The 49ers were unfazed by the cold, bringing their power running game to Green Bay. A back-andforth affair saw San Francisco quarterback Colin Kaepernick use his arm and legs to drive the team down the field for a game-winning field goal as time expired, sending the team to Carolina in the Division Round. Note: If you’re looking for a recommendation on where to watch a Chargers game in Hillcrest with rabid fans, I would give a shout out to Flicks (1017 University Ave.). They have the NFL package all season and have developed a large and loud Charger fan base. Sunday was crazy from kickoff of the Chargers game until the end of the 49er victor y. They show games in high def with the sound on, and offer free food for customers. Check it out next Sunday. SDSU men win at Allen Fieldhouse It’s almost unfair that the Aztecs men’s

Jerry Coleman playing for the New York Yankees in 1949, the season he was the Associated Press’ rookie of the year. (Courtesy San Diego Padres) basketball game was pitted up against Green Bay-San Francisco in a world where NFL is king, because not enough people saw this remarkable SDSU victor y. Ten years ago, it would have been unfathomable to imagine SDSU even being invited to play at Kansas, let alone going there and winning. In what is supposed to be a rebuilding season, head coach Steve Fisher’s squad improved to 12-1 and a national ranking of 13th following the 6157 victor y. Kansas may be down but they are still ranked, and that arena used to be a place where the Jayhawks never lost, period. No problem for the Aztecs. This is a team you simply must pay attention to if you enjoy college basketball. Xavier Thames, Josh Davis, Winston Shepard, J.J. O’Brien, and Skylar Spencer give SDSU a starting five that plays suffocating defense and is athletic as anyone. If they hit their perimeter shots, they can compete with anyone, as proven by a close loss to #1 Arizona back in December. And if you are lucky enough to come across a game ticket, treat yourself to the experience that has become “The Show” at Viejas Arena, where the nation’s best student section keeps the arena entertained and rocking all game long. Jerr y Coleman hangs his last star As Chargers fans were celebrating the big win in Cincinnati, news broke that Hall of Famer and Padres broadcaster Jerr y Coleman had passed away. Elation quickly turned to hugs and a few tears among the Padres fan friends I was with. “The Colonel” made his mark during nine seasons with the Yankees, including six World Series appearances and one Series MVP. He also ser ved during WWII and Korea, and became the voice of the Padres while teamed with Ted Leitner. Jerr y was such a kind man in all of my

Coleman receiving Ford C. Frick Award from National Baseball Hall of Fame in 2005. (Courtesy San Diego Padres)

interactions with him at work, and he will be missed by so many. It is impossible to fully recognize him for ever ything that he meant to this community. —Jef f Praught is actively involved in the LGBT spor ts community, where he plays in the local softball (AFCSL), football (SDAFFL) and basketball (SD Hoops) leagues. He has served on AFCSL’s board of of ficers in various capacities and is currently the commissioner of SD Hoops. t


GOODBYE, MR. CHIPS ACROSS 1 Breaks for Heather’s mommies 5 They circle Uranus 10 Slugger Ruth 14 “Houston, we have a problem” 15 Deuce follower, for Mauresmo 16 Traditional apple tree spot 17 O’Toole’s role in a 1962 movie 19 Ron Howard film with Ellen DeGeneres 20 Shop with an anvil 21 Cumming on the stage 23 Sexual ending 24 Chicago producer Meron 26 Come and go 28 Last word of a fairy tale 31 Comrade, in QuÈbec 33 “If ___ nickel for every time ...” 35 “If you’d been any prettier, it would have been ...”, with 45-Across 37 Survivor adjective 38 Letters after CD

39 The late great O’Toole 41 The “A” in GPA 42 One with a gifted tongue 45 See 35-Across 48 Indian lute 49 “Just kidding!” 50 Remove a slip? 51 The Sound of Music song 53 Satisfy fully 55 Sibling, in brief 56 “That smarts!” 58 Head bones 62 Mekong River country 64 Source of this puzzle’s quote about O’Toole 66 Bottoms’ description of tops? 67 Like crystal 68 Slightly 69 Where to see sweaty athletes 70 Drag queen ___ Lettuce 71 Itches

Goodbye, Mr. Chips solution on page 15 DOWN 1 Testicles 2 Clumsy come-on 3 Type of sci, in college 4 William, who played with George Takei 5 Bloody queen 6 Dedicated poem 7 Chaplin spouse 8 Cores, to Atom Egoyan? 9 Get to second base, perhaps 10 One ruled by a queen 11 Ethiopia’s capital 12 Kim Carnes sang about her eyes 13 Word after “penis” 18 “I don’t see it” 22 Neet competitor 25 Arsenic’s old partner 27 Letter on a key 28 Kinky coifs 29 Pensacola people 30 Warhol subject

32 “Let’s make it a threesome!” 34 Hot-tub buildup 36 Listener-sponsored org. 37 La leader 40 Small salamanders 43 Road top 44 Bite it 46 Like bell-bottom jeans 47 Sunken passage 49 Kidman of The Hours 52 Chew (on) 54 Capital of Ghana 55 Fruit flavor for gin 57 Pay attention to 59 Six Feet Under character 60 Persian Gulf land 61 Computes the bottom line 63 IRS info 65 Young chap


GAY SAN DIEGO Jan. 10-23, 2014



DEEP INSIDE HOLLYWOOD guez connection: she worked in the art department of “Resident Evil: Retribution”). Rodriguez will play a famous movie star looking to relax away from the spotlight by hitting an out-of-the-way dive bar with a friend (Danish actress Rie Rasmussen, “Femme Fatale”), and then things go wrong. Knowing and loving the typecast badass Rodriguez, we’ll just assume she regulates the situation when necessary. Could this be the Lady “Road House” we’ve longed for all this time?

Sandra Bernhard has a mob comedy in store (Courtesy Olive PR) What’s Sandra Bernhard doing? It’s good to check in with your favorite people from time to time, see how they’re doing. And Deep Inside Hollywood loves Sandra Bernhard more than almost anyone (you’re great, too, Ellen; we just like ’em really sharp and sarcastic). She’s touring the country with her new one-woman show “I Love Being Me, Don’t You?” and still jumping aboard the indie-film train every time it stops for her. She has no fewer than three in the pipeline, including “Landlocked” co-starring Armand Assante and Bob Balaban, plot details unknown; the mob comedy “’79 Parts” starring Eric Roberts; and first-time feature director Guy Guido’s “Lovin’ Brooklyn.” It’s this last one that will probably generate the most heat, since it’s about a Latin Hustle dance competition and co-stars Courtney Galiano, choreographer of “So You Think You Can Dance” and “Dancing With the Stars” audience favorite, Ukrainian heartthrob Maksim “Maks” Chmerkovskiy (you know,

the one who takes off his shirt a lot). We hope Sandra dances, too – it’s been a long time since that nude “Little Red Corvette” sequence in “Without You I’m Nothing.” Michelle Rodriguez: 10% and 1% “Eventually it’s going to wrinkle up and I’m not going to be able to use it. I wanted to be honest about who I am and see what happens,” said Michelle Rodriguez several weeks ago when, after years of speculation, she addressed her bisexuality in her trademark blunt, funny style. Not that it was much of a secret, mind you, but it’s nice to finally have her quote-ready oneliners put to good queer use. Sadly, with the death of Paul Walker, Rodriguez’s appearance in “Fast and Furious 7” won’t see theaters until 2015 (after a planned summer 2014 release). So in the meantime, a smaller project will have to do for her fans. She’ll appear in the indie “1%ers,” written and directed by up-and-coming filmmaker Francesca de Sola (Rodri-

Sundance, bloody Sundance The LGBT offerings at this year’s upcoming Sundance Film Festival involve some freshly acclaimed names as well as some old-school indie vets (and one iconic pop culture personality). Ira Sachs, indie darling of the moment after his critically adored feature “Keep the Lights On,” returns with a new feature, “Love is Strange,” starring John Lithgow and Alfred Molina as a gay couple together for 39 years who must suddenly live apart. Meanwhile, Gregg Araki (“Mysterious Skin”) has a new one, too: “White Bird in A Blizzard,” starring Shailene Woodley, Eva Green and Gabourey Sidibe, and based on the novel by Laura Kasischke. But it’s “To Be Takei” that looks like it’ll be the fest’s biggest crowd-pleaser. It’s a documentary about Star Trek’s funniest, most outspoken gay alumnus, George Takei, as he and his husband assume the role of activists around the country. And if you follow him on Twitter you already know that the man can work a crowd. Of course, then there’s the Nick Offerman documentary but, with the exception of the micro-culture of gay male Ron Swanson and/or mustache enthusiasts, it doesn’t really count as a queer offering. Porn, yes. Gay, not so much.

hammering out the money, so when the official casting for the horror movie “Visions” makes the news, you’ll know that they met Jim Parsons’ (“The Big Bang Theory”) quote. Oh, yes, and “quote” means the minimum amount of money an actor will accept to appear in a film, Super Bowl ad, music video or dictator’s birthday party. Anyway, “Visions,” from director Kevin Greutert (“Saw VI,” “Saw 3D”), concerns a pregnant woman experiencing horrific visions. That’s as much of a plot synopsis as is available for now, but it’s probably an easy guess that those visions aren’t just due to an overactive imagination. Isla Fisher is in negotiations to play the Rosemary in this Polanskilike thriller, and it can be assumed that Parsons would play her husband and, if the talks go well, that sassy Ellen Barkin will come aboard, too, perhaps as something demonic, which would be cool. — Romeo San Vicente has danced professionally in the Make It Rain industry and still gives private tutorials. He can be reached care of this publication or at

Jim Parsons having “Visions” “In negotiations” means they’re

Big Bang Theory's Jim Parsons

(Photo by Helga Esteb / FROM PAGE 5

CODEPENDENCE fix HIM. Focus on yourself. Ending codependency doesn’t mean being cold-hearted; it does mean letting go of feeling overly responsible for other people and not putting your own needs at a lower priority than theirs. Codependency can occur in any type of relationship: families, at work, friendships, and also in romantic, peer or community relationships. Codependent folks typically have some of the following characteristics: A strong need to feel in control (If I’m taking care of you, then I get to call the shots.) Denial of their own needs (No, go ahead and have the last piece of cake, I’m fine. Really, it’s okay.) Low self-esteem (My needs aren’t as important as yours are.) Illusions of their own superiority (I am much more together than you are, so let me help you.) Excessive people-pleasing tendencies (I can’t stand it if people don’t like me.) If you know that you have codependent tendencies, it’s time to take a good, hard look at yourself. Is this a pattern for you? Have you always felt hyper-responsible for others? If so, Melody Beattie’s book “Codependent No More” is a good place to start. There are 12-step based meetings for people who want to become less codependent. Google “CODA” (Codependents Anonymous) for meeting times and locations near you. As this new year unfolds, it’s the perfect time to look at any codependent behavior and consider changing old patterns. Why not focus on your own needs and begin to take better care of yourself? I’ll bet that you’ll soon start attracting new friends who will treat you better, too. —Michael Kimmel is a licensed psychotherapist who specializes in helping LGBT clients achieve their goals and deal with anxiety, depression, grief, sexually addictive behavior, coming out, relationship challenges and homophobia. Michael is currently accepting new clients. Contact him at 619-955-3311 or visit

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a year before my eyes Charlene Baldridge | GSD Theater Critic


uring 2013 SDCNN arts writer Charlene Baldridge witnessed 166 music/theatre presentations, including lectures, play readings, dance programs and seminars — and that doesn’t count things she returned to see again, concerts and lectures aboard ship in August and five operas in Santa Fe. Early in my life devoted to writing about theater and music, I wrote a yearend piece that was divided into such sections as A) “I hated it — everyone else loved it”; B) “I loved it — everyone else hated it”; and C) “No one saw it, other than I.” That was long ago, when I still looked for conformity. If I thought something was awful and the other critics praised it, my opinion must be wrong, right? These days, I seldom read what others write. There are some whose opinions I respect. But reading their opinions does not change my own: I am Taurus and I am always right. That’s what nearly 20 years does: It makes you more certain of your opinions, right or wrong; perhaps that is because you have a larger pool of experiences with which to make comparisons. Or maybe it’s because with criticism there is no right or wrong, only subjective opinion. When I write about “Spring Awakening,” for instance, I’m not going to compare it to other productions, tediously recounting the virtues of each. Nor will I go on at length about the source material, or question its suitability for youth of a certain age. Or even adults of a certain mindset. I might, however, admit I’m partial to singer/songwriter Duncan Sheik, and I might even mention his theatrical failure (“Whisper House” with Kyle Jarrow) and my disappointment that critics and audiences seemed to miss the piece and its intent. Those who love “Spring Awakening” will have another go at the piece when Cygnet Theatre produces it in Old Town in March and April. Cygnet has received a $10,000 NEA grant in support of events surrounding the production. More power to them.

(clockwise, from left) Jai Rodriguez in “In the Heights,” (Photo by Daren Scott); the cast of “In the Heights” at San Diego REP (Photo by Daren Scott); “The Importance of Being Earnest” at Cygnet (Photo by Ken Jacques); Big Edie and Little Edie of “Grey Gardens” (Photo by Ken Jacques).

The best of 2013: order to return the home where she raised as the talkative, dead Tiger, who declares “Venus in Fur,” “In the Heights,” and her children. he’s an atheist, then goes on a search for “Federal Jazz Project,” at San Diego Reper“Tribes” and “The Tallest Tree” at La Jolla God to find out why he’s still alive and why tory Theatre. Co-directed by Kim RubinPlayhouse: Daniel Beatty, who performed in he has such a hungry nature. Evan Kendig stein and Sam Woodhouse, “Venus in Fur” the latter, a one-man show about singer Paul and Jake Rosko portrayed the American G.I.s featured incendiary performances by Jeffrey Robson, also came out with a children’s book responsible for the Tiger’s demise. Meek and Caroline Kinsolving. toward the end of the year. Titled “Knock, “Murder in the Cathedral,” Ildebrando “Be a Good Little Widow,” “Other Desert Knock,” it’s about Beatty’s father, absent for Pizzetti’s 1953 opera, directed by Ian CampCities,” and “A Gentleman’s Guide to Love much of the playwright/performer’s childbell, at San Diego Opera: The great Italian and Murder” at The Old Globe. Directed by hood because he was incarcerated. bass-baritone Ferruccio Furlanetto portrayed Darko Tresnjak and starring UCSD gradu“The Bluest Eye” and “Skinless” at Moxie Thomas Becket, the assassinated Archbishate Jefferson Mays, “A Gentleman’s Guide” Theatre, two well-produced, haunting and op of Canterbury in the piece based on T.S. moved on to Broadway where it was still imperfect plays. Elliot’s verse play. The production offered an playing at press time. “Chicago” produced by San Diego Musiextraordinary opportunity to see this rarely “Gem of the Ocean,” “Assassins” “Traves- cal Theatre at Birch North Park Theatre, a performed work. ties”/ “The Importance of Being Earnest” at fine production featuring Robert Townsend “Fiddler on the Roof,” “Wit” and “The 39 Cygnet, which continues its tradition of work as the crooked lawyer. Steps” at Lamb’s Player’s Theatre: Deborah worth seeing. “Bengal Tiger at the Baghdad Zoo,” Smyth was incandescent as the dying aca“Cuatro Corridos,” Experimental Theatre, “Grey Gardens,” and “Shining City,” at ion demic in “Wit.” Look for “39 Steps” at Horton UCSD — Kind of fits into the “Nobody Saw theatre company: Rajiv Joseph’s Grand Theatre beginning January 15; and It But I” category, this haunt“Bengal Tiger,” one of my favor“Fiddler” at the Lyceum Theatre beginning ing piece about cross-border ite pieces of all time, starred January 10. human trafficking was cothe splendid Ron Choular- ton David Wiener’s “Extraordinary Champroduced and performed bers” produced by Mo’olelo Performby Susan Narucki, one of ing Arts Company at 10th Avenue the city’s finest singers. Theatre, featured the return Ruff Yeager was of actor Greg Watanabe and a stage direcsplendid scenic design by David F. tor and Jorge Weiner, representing the ruins Volpi wrote at Angkor Wat. the libretto. “She-Rantulas from Music was Outer Space — in 3D!” composed at Diversionary — a Hebert fabulously funny new Vázquez, play by Ruff Yeager and Arlene Phil Johnson. Sierra, “Bearded” produced Lei Liang, by Circle Circle dot dot and Hilda at 10th Avenue Theatre, Paredes. a world premiere play “The Trip by Katherine Harroff to Bountiful” based on interviews at New Village with department store Arts, featured Santas. a powerful performance Out of town: by Sylvia M’Lafi John Adams’ “The Thompson as the Gospel According to the elderly woman Cast from “She-Rantulas from Outerspace – in 3D” (Photo by Daren Scott) see Theater, pg 18 who runs away in



GAY SAN DIEGO Jan. 10–23, 2014

Reasonable resolutions: Setting yourself UP for success in ANY YEAR BLAKE & GWEN BECKCOM

FITNESS Now that the last gift boxes have been put away and the holiday decorations are starting to come down, the New Year and a new set of resolutions are well underway. Before you get sucked into the stress of setting New Year’s resolutions and deciding what type of bandwagon you want to jump on to lead a healthier and fit lifestyle, it’s important first and foremost to establish some solid groundwork to ensure you’re setting reasonable resolutions for yourself that can be realistically achieved. Seven out of ten resolutions don’t work because come January 1 people think they can just turn on a light switch. Right now, your light switch is off and it can be months, and most of the time years, that you’ve spent ingraining bad habits into your life like not exercising, eating unhealthy or being stressed out. As a human being, you can’t just change your emotions and habits from being off to on overnight. To switch up the odds that may be stacked against you in succeeding with your resolutions this year, make sure to include the following

criteria into your planning so that you can successfully transform your health goals, ambitions and resolutions into a new lifestyle for the long-term. Take Small Steps to Accomplish Big Results Contrary to popular New Year approaches, resolutions shouldn’t be an all or nothing approach. The foundation to building successful resolutions that last for the longterm relies on making incremental realistic changes to your lifestyle on an ongoing basis. For instance, instead of saying that you’re going to start working out and restricting all unhealthy food items all at once, a more successful approach is to pick one goal to focus on for the first couple of weeks and then add the second goal only after you get a good handle on managing the first one. It also is important to realize, and plan, that you are going to hit bumps along the way to accomplishing your resolutions. The best way to stay on course is to not worry about the past –— it’s already gone; or stress out about the future — it’s not here yet. Only think about today and focus on what steps you can take now to get closer to achieving your goals. Within six to seven weeks, up to 70 percent of people who make resolutions drop off. People are putting too much on their plate, it stresses them out and when they hit an obstacle like not working out

for a few days or having a bad day eating healthy, they just give up. You have to give yourself enough time to work it out and figure out how to break your bad habits. If you do it in small increments, it’s less stressful and more manageable. In time, small steps will equal big steps. Give yourself the green light to enjoy life Resolutions can have negative connotations associated with them and they can automatically put you into a negative mindset when the first of the year arrives if they aren’t approached appropriately. Turn the negativity associated with making resolutions — taking away the food you enjoy, doing exercises you don’t like — into a more positive experience by adapting your resolutions to fit what you enjoy and what makes you happy. For example, if want to start exercising next week, pick out something that you like to do first. Whether you enjoy bicycling, swimming, walking, doing aerobics classes or playing sports, focus on becoming consistent with one of your favorite activities. Eventually, after you’ve gotten into a more active routine, you can then branch out to try different workouts or activities when you’re ready for a new challenge or adventure. The same concept holds true with changing up your diet as well. Rather than starting to eat healthy cold turkey and forcing yourself to eat foods

that don’t taste good to you, gradually wean yourself off your guilty indulgences — whether it’s sodas, sweets or salty treats — until you eventually substitute all of your cravings with healthier alternatives that agree with your nutrition goals and your taste buds. Surround yourself with a strong support system When you set out to make changes to who you are and the life you live, you have to surround yourself with a strong support group who will accept the changes you want to make for yourself and encourage you to do whatever it takes to successfully meet your goals. Your personal support can be anyone — a family member, friend, mentor or even a personal trainer. You just need to have someone who supports what you’re doing and is available for you to turn to when you need advice or guidance. If you hang out with the wrong group of people, those resolutions will go right down the drain. Celebrate your successful results Although living a healthy and fit lifestyle takes continuous effort and dedication, it should only take about four weeks or so of doing all of your workouts and eating right before you start realizing the results of sticking to your resolutions. The results, though, won’t necessarily be ones that you can see on the outside, but rather ones

that make you feel better inside about the accomplishments you have achieved and the person you are becoming. You ARE going to start feeling better on the inside before you start seeing differences on the outside. The key is to stay at it consistently and not give in or give up. You will become proud of yourself and begin to feel confident in your abilities. You also will start to believe that what you’re doing is really worth it. That’s when the BIG MO kicks in … MOMENTUM baby. Whether it’s internal or external results that you accomplish first from your resolutions, it’s important to celebrate all of your successes to keep you on course and motivated to continually strive to achieve your ultimate goals for the year. The key to successfully accomplishing any type of resolution is to keep your expectations realistic and to lay out a path to achieving your goals that fits with your specific personality and interests. —Gwen and Blake Beckcom own Fitness Together Mission Hills, offering personal training with qualified professionals by regular appointment in private suites. Exercise and nutritional programs are custom designed to fit your needs and abilities. Call 619-794-0014 for more information or to schedule a free fitness diagnostic and private training session.t

events attheCenter Wednesday, Jan. 15

Saturday, Jan. 25

Lunch & Learn: Fire and Burn Prevention education Program

Microsoft Word Basics

12 noon, Center Library Join 50 and Better Together as The Burn Institute presents the Fire and Burn Prevention Education Program. This informative and entertaining session will provide important information from fire safety kitchen tips to the importance of smoke alarms. Also, find out more about how seniors can receive a FREE smoke alarm installation in the following months! For further information and to rSVP, contact Larue Fields at or 619.692.2077 x205.

Friday, Jan. 24

Covered California (and You!) 3-5 pm, the Center Have questions about Covered California and health insurance coverage? Join us at The Center on Friday, Jan. 24 from 3-5 pm for a special presentation designed specifically for members of the LGBT community to learn more about health coverage through the Affordable Care Act. Community leaders and experts on HIV/AIDS, transgender issues, the Latino/immigrant experience and more will be on hand to answer your questions. Childcare will be provided. Don’t miss this important event! For more information, contact aldo at or 619.692.2077 x213. To RSVP for childcare contact Jane at or 619.692.2077 x121.

10 am, Cyber Center Join us to learn the basics about Microsoft Word such as creating, saving and retrieving documents; inserting and deleting text; formatting text; and using cut, copy and paste, and more. Space is limited. to reserve your spot, please sign up in the Cyber Center, email, or call 619. 692.2077 x0. All computer classes are located in the David Bohnett Cyber Center and are free unless otherwise indicated. A scene from “Grey Gardens” at ion theatre (Photo by Ken Jacques)

Saturday, Jan. 25

Facebook & twitter



11:30 am, Cyber Center You’ve signed up for Facebook and/or Twitter but aren’t sure about all the new features – in this class you’ll learn about Facebook and Twitter features such as fan pages, photo albums, tagging, and messaging. Space is limited. to reserve your spot, please sign up in the Cyber Center, email, or call 619. 692.2077 x0. All computer classes are located in the David Bohnett Cyber Center and are free unless otherwise indicated. The San Diego LGBT Community Center 3909 Centre Street • 619-692-2077

Twitter: @LGBTCenter

Other Mary,” directed by Peter Sellars at Los Angeles Philharmonic The world premiere of Theodore Morrison’s “Oscar” at Santa Fe Opera, starring countertenor David Daniels as Oscar Wilde San Diego concerns as we travel into 2014: The future of San Diego Musical Theatre at the Birch North Park Theatre, which recently changed ownership and management; the future of Diversionary Theatre as it searches for new leadership; and the future of Mo’olelo Performing Arts Company as it seeks new leadership due to the departure of founding artistic director Seema Sueko, who moved to Pasadena Playhouse.t

GAY SAN DIEGO Jan. 10–23, 2014



GAY SAN DIEGO Jan. 10–23, 2014

Gay San Diego - January 10 2014  
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