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Volume 4 Issue 16 Aug. 9–22, 2013 Follow us on Facebook and Twitter.





Pride loses 2 board members


Co-chairs resign on same day; organization remains resilient By Anthony King | GSD Editor

Rally for Manning

Though he did not give specific details regarding Luhnow’s departure, Brown said the board and former CEO had “different alignments.” “Over a six-month time period … the board finally rose to the place of saying, ‘No, this is a responsibility of ours and this is

Two San Diego LGBT Pride cochairs resigned from the non-profit organization following this year’s 39th annual Parade and Festival. Co-chair Ebony Aldridge and co-chair elect William RodriguezKennedy both submitted letters of resignation, marking Aug. 1 as their departure. In a press release from Pride, the organization wished “best of luck” to Aldridge, and “much success” in Rodriguez-Kennedy’s political pursuits. In an interview after his resignation, Rodriguez-Kennedy said he had formed a political action committee, or PAC, with two other democrats that could have been problematic moving forward. “The more I get involved with that, the more that’s going to take more of my time,” he said. “That was one of the major reasons that played into the fact that I wanted to leave.” Time and focus are two key points to Aldridge’s departure as well, who said she wanted to devote more effort to two other groups she is passionate about: Dignity Delivery and The Glitteratti. “I just thought it was time to focus on the smaller groups that I can make a bigger impact on,” Aldridge said after her resignation. “I’ve done so many great things with Pride, and [with] it being a wonderful organization – how much we give back – [I felt] it would be OK that I try to help another organization.” Aldridge was voted co-chair elect with Rodriguez-Kennedy at the end of summer last year, and the pair have a combined service of over eight years to the organization. They were set to take over as board chairs after a year of training. Before that could happen, former co-chair Jennifer Sieber resigned mid-April, with Aldridge moving into the official co-chair position with current chair, Joseph Mayer. Rodriguez-Kennedy, however, helped to run the meetings with Aldridge as co-chair elect. “They were a team,” Mayer said of their departure. “Maybe … because one was leaving, the other decided to leave.” Aldridge said she did not discuss her decision with Rodriguez-Kennedy prior to the announcement. The pair’s resignation came one day following a closed-session board meeting on July 31. Mayer said the meeting “was not in regard to either of them leaving,” adding that he was surprised by their announcement Aug. 1. “I was saddened. They both have a lot to bring to the community, and they have done a lot for

see GSDBA, pg 9

see PrideBoard, pg 6

e DINING (l to r) Big Mike Phillips, Tom Brown and Frank Lechner opened Harvey Milk’s American Diner Aug. 1 (Courtesy Big Mike)

Changing of the guard As community remembers City Deli, Harvey Milk’s American Diner comes to Hillcrest Sicily at Solare



Back with IndiFest 8


By Anthony King | GSD Editor Community members, political leaders, employees and customers came to City Delicatessen & Bakery – affectionately known as City Deli or, for some, the cornerstone of Hillcrest – July 30 to honor and recognize the store’s 30 years of dedication to the neighborhood. Owners Alan Bilmes and Michael Wright, who opened the store July 12, 1984, have retired, and the restaurant’s new owners transitioned the location into Harvey Milk’s American Diner immediately. New co-owner and managing partner Frank Lechner said doors will remain open while they update the menu, brand the restaurant as Harvey Milk’s American Diner and plan a slight remodel. Lechner purchased the business with partners Michael “Big Mike” Phillips and Tom Brown. The date of transfer was Aug. 1.

“Remodeling plans are tentatively scheduled for September [or] October,” Lechner said. “[We] will be giving the interior a fresh new look along with an exterior color change, [and] the Diner will close down for a brief period during the remodel.” Additionally, Lechner said they will be replacing the signage on the front of the restaurant with official Harvey Milk’s American Diner signs this month. The Diner is located at the intersection of Sixth and University avenues. The new owners have an agreement with the Milk family to license the late civil-rights activist’s name and image, and Lechner said one percent of gross sales will go to the Harvey Milk Foundation, paid quarterly. Select menu items from City Deli will remain, as will

see Diner, pg 5

GSDBA to search for new CEO Tom Luhnow steps down July 29, board chair vows commitment to community By Morgan M. Hurley | GSD Assistant Editor

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The Greater San Diego Business Association (GSDBA) is preparing to launch an extensive search for a new chief executive officer, and they are looking to the local community to not only take part in the search, but also to apply for the position. On July 29, the organization announced the resignation of Tom Luhnow, CEO since 2009. Within days, former board member Michelle Burkart was appointed general manager, and will lead the organization through the search phase as well as wrap up content for the print of their flagship publication, the annual GSDBA Business Directory. “We needed someone who could step right in and I knew Michelle could do that,” said Eric Brown, GSDBA board chair. “I also knew she had been intimately aware of the process of creating our directory for years.”

Brown said Burkart, who runs, is filling a temporary position and not interested in applying for CEO. He said the board plans to meet Aug. 24 to develop criteria for the position and put the search committee in place. They will then launch the official search Oct. 1 and expect to have a new CEO in place by Jan. 2, 2014. “We want a fair process; that is important to me,” Brown said, adding he has already started reaching out to large and small local companies in order to staff the search committee, and is focused on making it as diverse as possible. “It will be made up of one-third board members, one-third GSDBA members and one-third the community,” he said. “That is my commitment to the community, as a stakeholder. Having a gay and lesbian chamber, it’s about inclusion as much as it is about what industry we’re helping to develop or [pursue].”


GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013


GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013


Gathering for ‘freedom and justice’ San Diego rally held on day of Bradley Manning guilty verdicts, Coalition seeks to spark debate

The San Diego Coalition to Free Manning staged a rally in Hillcrest July 30. (Photo by GSD) By Anthony King | GSD Editor The San Diego Coalition to Free Manning staged a rally at the intersection of Sixth and University avenues July 30, in part to bring attention to Army Pfc. Bradley Manning’s court martial verdict, announced earlier in the day. Manning, who has been on trial since June 3 for leaking classified government information, was found guilty on 20 of 22 charges. Regarding the most serious offence – aiding the enemy by indirect means – Manning was found not guilty, and while the news was positive for many, some Coalition members found the announcement bittersweet, as Manning could spend most, if not the rest, of his life in prison.

Sentencing was scheduled to begin within days of the verdict, and initial estimates saw Manning facing up to 136 years. On Tuesday, Aug. 6, a judge reduced Manning’s maximum sentence to 90 years. Manning is 25 years old, and at the time of print for this story, Manning’s sentence had yet to be announced. “We hope that people see that this has not been a fair trial, and that Bradley Manning did a just and heroic thing,” said Sean Bohac of SAME Alliance in a press release for the rally. “Manning hoped the revelations would inspire debate and reform. Our aim is to assist our hero in this shared mission.” Bohac’s desire reflects a statement Man-

ning read earlier this year in court, where he said he did not feel the leaked information would harm the United States. He pled guilty to 10 lesser charges on Feb. 28. “I believed that if the general public, especially the American public, had access to the information … it could spark a domestic debate on the role of the military and our foreign policy in general as it related to Iraq and Afghanistan,” Manning said in the statement, published on “I also believed the detailed analysis of the data over a long period of time by different sectors of society might cause society to reevaluate the need or even the desire to … engage in counterterrorism and counterinsurgency operations that ignore the complex dynamics of the people living in the affected environment everyday,” he said. The crowd of approximately 45 people at the July 30 rally stood at the Hillcrest intersection holding signs that read “Whistleblowing is not a crime” and “Transparency is essential to democracy,” handed out fliers, and offered a microphone for those who wanted to speak. Several people driving by honked in support.

In addition to signs picturing Manning’s face and calling him a hero, some attendees held rainbow Peace flags and the blue and pink Transgender flag. In Manning’s pre-trail hearing held December 2012, Manning’s defense lawyer chose to show that Manning was suffering from extensive stress during the time he leaked documents because of a struggle with his sexual identity. Coalition member and Canvass for a Cause coordinator Gabriel Conaway, along with other rally organizers, said they were “deeply troubled” by the Obama administration and military official’s “tactics” during the trial, which they said “tilt the proceeding to the advantage of the prosecution and against the principle of the freedom of the press.” Conaway cited press intimidation and lack of public access to court documents, among others. “The powers that be will stop at nothing in their war on whistleblowers,” he said in the release. “They pose not only a threat to Manning, but to freedom of the press and government transparency.” Bohac agreed with Conaway’s sentiment, saying, “Organizing these actions helps spark important debate about the failure of the Obama administration to be on the side of freedom and justice.” In an open letter to President Obama and U.S. Secretary of Defense Chuck Hagel published July 30, 17 members of the European Parliament – who were “elected to represent our constituents throughout Europe,” they said – called on the U.S. to release Manning. “We hereby urge you to end the persecution of Bradley Manning, a young gay man who has been imprisoned for over three years, including 10 months in solitary confinement,” they wrote. “Bradley Manning has already suffered too much, and he should be freed as soon as humanly possible.”t


GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013


Post-DOMA deluge National court-driven push for marriage equality occurs after June Supreme Court rulings By Lisa Keen | Keen News Service “The lay of the land is getting a bit complicated,” said James Esseks, director of the ACLU’s National LGBT and AIDS Project. Esseks, who was one of the attorneys involved in pressing the case of Edith Windsor – which ultimately struck down the core provision of the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) June 26 – was assessing the deluge of litigation that has ensued in the one month since the U.S. Supreme Court issued that ruling and the ruling that let stand a federal district court ruling that California’s Proposition 8 was unconstitutional. “It’s hard to keep count,” he said. In the past month, at least a dozen new lawsuits have been launched all over the country as a result of the Supreme Court decisions. Some seek to end bans like Proposition 8 in other states. Others seek to secure for specific couples in specific circumstances the benefits of marriage that DOMA once barred. Rulings in other lawsuits – those filed before the DOMA decision – have advanced the reach of marriage equality in numerous places in the past month. And, with relatively little publicity, the lawyers hired by House Republican leaders to defend DOMA indicated that, because of the Supreme Court’s ruling, “the House has determined … that it will no longer defend that statute.” These are all important developments, coloring in the lines that the Supreme Court has drawn with its rulings, and many are happening in states where civil rights for LGBT people almost never advance in a positive direction. The ACLU and its affiliates have active cases underway in Pennsylvania and North Carolina. They also have a case with the National Center for Lesbian Rights filed in New Mexico. Jon Davidson, legal director for the Lambda Legal group, has litigation pending in New Jersey and Nevada, the latter of which is already at the federal appeals level. Lambda also has a case in Arizona seeking to preserve health coverage for the same-sex domestic partners of state employees. And Lambda and the ACLU each have separate cases pending (and now consolidated) in Illinois, lawsuits filed before DOMA was struck down. They have announced a joint lawsuit to be filed soon in Virginia. In addition to these, Davidson says he knows of lawsuits filed by attorneys working alone in Arkansas, Hawaii, Louisiana, Michigan, New Mexico, Oklahoma, Texas and Utah. And news reports have identified an additional private lawsuit in Kentucky. Two of the big newsmakers during the past month have involved cases in two of the bigger states: Ohio and Pennsylvania. In Cincinnati, U.S. District Court Judge Timothy Black ruled July 19 that Ohio, which has a state constitutional amendment banning recognition of marriages between samesex partners, must recognize the valid marriage license an Ohio gay couple obtained this month in Maryland.

In Obergefell v. Kasich, Judge Black, an appointee of President Obama, said there was “insufficient evidence of a legitimate state interest to justify this singling out of same sex married couples given the severe and irreparable harm it imposes.” The case of John Arthur and James Obergefell garnered considerable attention from national media, in part because the couple had to rent a charter airplane to transport the men to Maryland because Arthur is in the late stages of a terminal illness. According to the Freedom to Marry organization, the men, who have been together for 20 years, were married July 11 on the tarmac at a Baltimore, Md. airport and then flew back to Ohio. They filed their lawsuit July 19 and Judge Black granted their motion for a temporary restraining order against Ohio July 22. “Throughout Ohio’s history,” Judge Black wrote, “Ohio law has been clear: a marriage solemnized outside of Ohio is valid in Ohio if it is valid where solemnized. … How then can Ohio, especially given the historical status of Ohio law, single out same sex marriges as ones it will not recognize? The short answer is that Ohio cannot … at least not under the circumstances here.” Some judicial and political figures came to a similar conclusion in Pennsylvania. There, in Montgomery County, Register of Wills Bruce Hanes said he and other county officials had studied the Supreme Court’s ruling in the U.S. v. Windsor DOMA case and determined it required them to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples. The county began issuing licenses to same-sex couples July 24 and, as of last month, a local news blog reports the county has issued 26 such licenses thus far. On the “Rachel Maddow Show” on MSNBC July 24, Hanes said his conclusion was prompted when two women contacted his office following the DOMA ruling to ask whether they might be able to obtain a license. In studying the mat matter, he said, the county officials felt that the state constitution’s guarantees of equality and non-discrimination trumped the state Definition of Marriage Act. “I swore to uphold the constitution of the commonwealth,” Hanes said. Another important case resolved this month by the Windsor DOMA decision was Golinski v. U.S. A Ninth Circuit U.S. Court of Appeals panel issued a four-page order July 23 stating that the parties to the case agree that the Supreme Court’s decision in the DOMA case, striking the law as unconstitutional, means DOMA no longer stands in the way of allowing an employee of the federal circuit, Karen Golinski, to obtain health coverage for her samesex spouse. Lambda Legal represented Golinski. Not every DOMArelated marriage lawsuit has Lambda, the ACLU, or any of the other big LGBT advocacy groups behind it. And

GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013

not every one is meeting with success. Domenico Nuckols of Galveston filed his own lawsuit in federal court in Galveston, Texas July 2, seeking to overturn that state’s ban on marriage for same-sex couples. But two weeks later, a federal judge dismissed the lawsuit at Nuckols’ request. Nuckols, who is an engineer, was attempting to represent himself in court. He told the Dallas Voice that he hasn’t tried to marry in Texas and has no plans to do so. He said LGBT legal activists had persuaded him to drop his litigation. But legal challenges are underway in other southern states. With the consent of the North Carolina Attorney General Roy Cooper, the ACLU has amended an existing lawsuit, Fisher-Borne v. Smith – one that seeks the right for co-parent adoption – to now seek the right for same-sex couples to marry. And the ACLU and Lambda announced they would file a joint lawsuit in Virginia. Meanwhile, a gay couple in Norfolk, Virginia filed their own lawsuit in federal district court July 18, challenging the state’s ban on issuing marriage licenses to same-sex couples. In Bostic v. McDonnell, Timothy Bostic and Tony London, who have been together for 23 years, say the state ban violates their rights to equal protection. And three gay couples filed a lawsuit in an Arkansas federal court July 15 seeking to overturn that state’s ban on allowing same-sex couples to marry. The lawsuit is Jernigan v. Crane and the judge initially assigned the case, Leon Holmes, recused himself, saying he has close, long-standing personal and professional relationships with the leaders who campaigned for the ban. In Kentucky, a gay male couple that has been together for 31 years and was married in 2004 filed a lawsuit July 26 in the federal district court for Louisville. In Bourke v. Beshear, Gregory Bourke and Michael Deleon and their two children are suing Democratic Governor Steve Beshear, seeking to require the state to recognize marriage licenses issued to same-sex couples in other jurisdictions. In a web interview with Louisville’s CourierJournal, Bourke explained that the couple, who married in Canada, decided to file the lawsuit because both men are Kentucky natives who love where they live. “So, when the Supreme Court rulings came out,” Deleon said, “that was probably the most hopeful day we’ve had in our 31 years that some day we might actually achieve marriage equality.” During the interview, the Courier reporter noted that they were facing “obviously a tough legal road here in Kentucky,” and asked why they would put their family, including their two adopted teen children, through the such tough “scrutiny.” “Well, we would gladly not do it if someone else was doing it instead,” Deleon said. But, he added, “we felt like this is just something we needed to do” and “… the fact that we do have James Esseks children, we can actually cite (Courtesy ACLU) how we have been harmed and disadvantaged.”t


DINER the bakery, and Lechner said a new menu is set to be released around Labor Day. “Harvey Milk’s American Diner will also be offering a full bar with all the current and popular cocktails,” he said. “The new menu for breakfast, lunch and dinner will have a mix of American comfort food including healthy options and low calorie plates.” As the community welcomes the new Diner, City Deli’s closing is also bittersweet for many, including Assembly Majority Leader Toni Atkins. For the past 30 years, the restaurant has been a personal – and political – center. “There [are] just so many things that have happened here for me personally, but also for this community,” Atkins said to a group of approximately 90 who had gathered to say goodbye to Bilmes and Wright. “This is the heart and soul of Hillcrest. There’s no better place.” It was fitting to have Atkins there July 30, along with other representatives from political leaders and groups in San Diego. Christopher Ward honored Bilmes and Wright with a proclamation from Sen. Marty Block; Anthony Bernal spoke for Council President Todd Gloria; and San Diego Democrats for Equality President Doug Case, as well as other members of the LGBT Democratic club, attended as well. “Not only City Deli started here, but the whole movement of Hillcrest [and] its notori-

(l to r) Nicole Murray Ramirez and Todd Gloria at the new diner (Courtesy Big Mike) ety,” Wright said. “We’re just very happy that we could be part of that … not just of the gay community, but of the straight community [as well].” Gloria, who was in a closed City Council session, asked Bernal to bring a proclamation from the City declaring July 30, 2013 as City Deli day. Both Bernal and event organizer Mike Spradley reiterated Gloria’s desire to attend, and the Council President visited the restaurant later, under the new ownership. Gloria and City Commissioner Nicole Murray Ramirez signed a replica of the Hillcrest Harvey Milk Street sign, giving


it to the new owners. Hillcrest Town Council board chair Luke Terpstra thanked Bilmes and Wright July 30 with a Let’s Improve Our Neighborhood award from the Town Council. Terpstra then read a statement from longtime City Deli supporters Ann Garwood and Nancy Moors, who could not attend. “We’re going to miss City Deli,” the women said in their message. “The restaurant has been an iconic fixture at the corner of Sixth and University for decades. Thank you Mike and Alan for being such a great example of how business and neighbors have worked

together to make Hillcrest better.” Wright served on the Hillcrest Business Association for several decades, and is a former two-term president of the organization. He was also one of the founding board members of the Uptown Parking District. “Hillcrest is fortunate to have many restaurants, but there’ll never be another City Deli,” Garwood and Moors said. Former and current employees all retold their own histor y with City Deli, with many working for Bilmes and Wright for over 15 years. Some, like many in the community, have been calling the restaurant a second home for the entire 30 years. The new owners have retained the former City Deli staff. “It seems like it’s over so fast,” Bilmes said. “We get reminded of all the memories of people meeting here, business going on [and] social politics. It’s wonderful that we’ve been a hub for that. I’m sure it’s going to continue.” Atkins thanked the couple for passing the business on to owners who will continue to keep both the LGBT and Hillcrest communities in mind for the future, and Lechner said they were “extremely happy and proud” to be a part of Hillcrest. “Harvey Milk’s American Diner is a place where we will feed the soul of our community. Everyone is welcome,” he said. Near the end of the speakers at the goodbye gathering – before the group broke up and parties mingled, retelling personal stories of their connection to the restaurant – Bilmes said his own thank you. “It’s been wonderful,” he said. “Thanks everybody for the memories.”t


GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013


Where do I start? It is going to be amazing!


SOUTH BAY ALLIANCE It’s hard to believe that it’s already August. We have just over a month before South Bay Pride Art & Music Festival. Things are getting very exciting – and busy. First, we are happy to announce the selection for Art of Pride in the Park. As part of supporting the arts in the community, South Bay Pride Art & Music Festival selected the top applicants to display their art at the festival. Congratulations to Diego Davila, James Dingman, John Carlos Keasler, Brandon Montgomery, Rebecca Neary, Victor Pena, Susanne Romo and Danny Suhendar. We look forward to seeing your art showcased at South Bay Pride. First place went to Montgomery, whose work in sculpture inspires.

“[In his] piece ‘Connectivity’ [he] captures the coming together of two people, in both physical and spiritual forms … as an ethereal blending of mind and spirit chakras,” said Dawn Marie Waxon. Our second place recipient is Dingman’s acrylic on canvas abstract representation, titled “Bad Dog.” “‘Bad Dog’ revealed a sense of an explosion of violence tempered by the communication via color and images,” Waxon said. Pena received third place with his oil on canvas work “Lemurian Sea,” with his “great use of color and texture,” Joann Sandlin said. Collectively, our showcased artists will provide the festival attendees with a broad representation of artistic mediums and styles. We are very proud of our selectees and I’m sure you will find an art piece that resonates. Our other competition, Gossip Grill’s “Got Talent” finale, is being held at Urban MO’s Saturday, Aug. 10 from 3 – 5 p.m. The five weeks of Tuesday night competitions at Gossip Grill culminated in a fantastic selection of finalists. Our 11 finalists will be competing for two performance spots at South Bay Pride, held Sept. 14. The choice will be made by the attending audience at the finale; you choose who gets to perform. Finalists are Larry Kuse, Simon William Griffith, Nicole Coffman,

Joshua Henderson, Tiara Gollaher, Dean Glass, Melissa Pulte, Michelle Witlow, James Michael McCullock, Tiffany Wright and Bryon Stanton. Come out and support your favorite. The ever-fantastic Laura Jane will be our emcee. In addition, we want to congratulate our South Bay Pride headliner, Sue Palmer, for receiving a nomination for Best Blues Album from the San Diego Music Awards. We’ve always known she is great, but it is nice to know she is getting the recognition she deserves. Check out the webpage for our full Main Stage lineup: This year we have added another stage for even more dancing, and we have some fantastic DJs for the Flak Productions DJ stage. Come out and dance to mixes by DJ Danik, DJ Kiki, DJ Dank and DJ Kristy Salazar on Sept. 14. We are also continuing our donation drive. South Bay Pride Art & Music Festival is a free event, and the way we keep it that way is through your generous community support. First, there is going to be another “early bird” opportunity drawing; for each $5 donation, you will get a ticket entered into our drawing. The early bird drawing will be held on Aug. 14, with the prize being an official Nick & Mel house party. The dynamic duo will perform two sets of music for you.

Go to to enter. A $750 value, this must be redeemed within six months of the contest, and the duo’s musicand comedy-based act has played around town and will appear as special guest in the Poppy Champlin’s Queer Queens of Qomedy show at the Birch North Park Theatre, Sept. 7. They would be sure to make any party a success! Second-place prizes are four tickets to the SunKiss festival on Aug. 17 ( All tickets will be eligible for additional drawings at South Bay Pride on Sept. 14. A lot of prizes will be given out, such as four VIP tickets to the John Mayer concert on Oct. 4 and four VIP tickets to the Jason Aldean concert on Oct. 18: all for donating to a good cause. Be a part of making this an amazing community pride and thank you to all of you who have already contributed and are supporting us. You are amazing. — Dae Elliott is a sociologist and lecturer working at SDSU since 1994. She is one of the founding executive committee members and current chair of South Bay Alliance, a 501(c)3 nonprofit organized in 2006 with the purpose of building a coalition of the LGBT community and allies for social networking, business promotion and political awareness in South San Diego County. South Bay Alliance has been the organizer of South Bay Pride Art & Music Festival since 2007. Contact her at FROM PAGE 1

PRIDEBOARD Pride,” he said. “I was shocked that they left because we had done our meeting and we had got through some issues.” Mayer also said timing was important, and called the organization “resilient.” He said historically most people leave the board immediately following the annual Festival. He will now reclaim his active role as co-chair, overseeing the board meetings and said he anticipates others from the board to come forward with their interests in chairing the board. Former Pride Executive Director Dwayne Crenshaw, who left the organization in April to focus on his campaign for City Council, said he was disappointed with Aldridge and Rodriguez-Kennedy leaving, yet understood and wished them well. “Having an African-American and Latino serving side by side as co-chairs of San Diego Pride would have made a powerful statement about the full diversity of the LGBT community, and perhaps focused attention on the continued work our community still needs to do to address issues of inclusion,” Crenshaw said. “I believe the remaining board members are committed to the organization’s mission and values, and I am hopeful they will move quickly to add new members, particularly women, to the board and its leadership,” he said. As part of the press release, Pride made a call for interested candidates to join the board, and Mayer said they were actively looking to fill vacant positions. The largest obstacle, he said, is finding people from the community who can commit their time. “Make sure that you have the time available,” he said, adding that the board had taken strides to become the governing body of Pride, leaving the day-to-day duties for staff, including General Manager Stephen Whitburn. Whitburn was hired to the permanent position by board vote at a separate closed-session meeting held April 10, and Mayer said the board would be discussing whether to now move forward with an executive director search “That’s something that we’re gonna look at,” Mayer said. “We definitely went with the general manager description … for Stephen because we hadn’t done what is normally … expected of a nonprofit group with an [executive director].” Mayer said this would possibly be addressed at the regular board retreat, occurring later this year. “I think that’s where the board needs to do its homework,” he said. “That’s gonna take some time for us to figure out.” While Pride refocuses, both Aldridge and Rodriguez-Kennedy remain confident in their decision to leave. “Our organization and community always seem to come together,” Aldridge said. “I think that there are capable people who can step up to the plate, and serve and run the organization just fine. I think we left it in pretty good shape.” Individuals interested in being considered to serve on the board are being asked to email Current requirements include attending three successive board meetings; the next open meeting is scheduled for Aug. 21. Pride offices are located at 3620 30th St.t


GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013


Impacting the economy Wedding-industry business owners hopeful for increase in wake of same-sex marriages By Manny Lopez | GSD Reporter Now that marriage equality is again law in California, many are expecting a boost to San Diego’s wedding-industry economy as a result. While some local sources say the anticipated financial surge has been slow in materializing, the outlook is hopeful. Since the June 26 Supreme Court ruling upheld a lower court’s decision that Proposition 8 was unconstitutional, the San Diego County Clerk’s office has reported a significant increase in the number of marriage licenses issued and civic ceremonies performed. The San Diego clerk’s office does not track the gender of couples applying for a marriage license, however Assistant Division Chief Jennifer Pechan said it is obvious the increase is due to marriage equality. University of San Diego Economist Allan Gin said it is still too early to tell, but he anticipates a positive impact for the economy materializing in the not too distant future. Gin pointed out that weddings take months and sometimes years to plan, which could explain why the local wedding economy has not yet experienced the anticipated windfall. Gin said San Diego is a natural tourist destination, and he expects that will mean more business for hotels and restaurants – from honeymooners attracted to the region’s excellent year-round weather – and less in the way of ceremonies. “There was so much pent-up anticipation immediately after the decision,” Gin said, “but it may take a while longer, because people don’t want to get burned again.” Gin was in part referring to San Diego County Clerk Ernest Dronenburg’s filing of

a petition in July asking the California Supreme Court to halt the state-wide issuance of marriage licenses by county clerks, until it clarifies the legality of Proposition 8. Dronenburg has since withdrawn the petition, but similar questions are being presented to the California Supreme Court. John Goosby of the Association of Bridal Consultants in Connecticut said based on information he has obtained from more than 450 websites and similar organizations around the world, the wedding industry as a whole is expecting an incredible increase in revenue from same-sex nuptials. Goosby said he observed many couples rushing out and organizing smaller weddings, but expects larger weddings will come later, since they typically take more time to plan. He said that when they do occur, higher-end vendors will see a dramatic increase in business, especially in California, where same-gender weddings tend to have larger average budgets than the rest of the country. Father Rick Castanon, rector at Saint John the Beloved, a Catholic church that fully welcomes, embraces and celebrates the San Diego LGBT community, said that since the ruling in June, his church has performed three same-sex weddings, with more in the planning stages. With a congregation of 50, Castanon said he is aware of more proposals and an increase in engagements, but the number of

Carlos Franco of Green Fresh Florals in Hillcrest has experienced a boost in business since June 26. (Photos by GSD) ceremonies is smaller compared to 2008, when they were first allowed in California. Carlos Franco, owner of Green Fresh Florals in Hillcrest, reported his flower shop has experienced a boost in business as a result of more gay and lesbian weddings. Franco said he believes that many of his competitors may not get the same results, primarily because gay and lesbian couples prefer to focus their spending power on vendors that are part of the LGBT community. “It’s an important factor for many couples when choosing a vendor,” Franco said. “It’s also important when choosing someone to work with that they have plenty of experience dealing with same-sex weddings.” That opinion was echoed by photographer Jonathan Cervantes, who has been actively marketing to the LGBT community in Hillcrest for the past 22 years. “There are many photographers who aren’t knowledgeable in some of the requirements and preferences involved in gay weddings,”

Cervantes said. “The sentiments are the same, but the poses are different when you’re capturing images of two males or two females. You have to know what you’re doing.” For Stuart Benjamin of Stuart Benjamin and Co. Jewelry Designs, located in the Hazard Center shopping center in Mission Valley, his wedding-band business exploded when the state started issuing marriage licenses to same-sex couples in 2008. After the ruling in June, he said that sales to the gay and lesbian community have started coming back, although slowly. “I don’t look at the LGBT community in terms of dollars and cents,” Benjamin said. “I was born and raised in San Diego and I enjoy working with the LGBT community because they appreciate the nicer things in life. They enjoy fine jewelry and unique designs and that’s what we enjoy selling.” For more information on Green Fresh Florals, visit; for Jonathan’s Photography & Graphic Design, visit; and for Stuart Benjamin & Co., visit



GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013


DOMA’s still here By Abby Dees The Supreme Court’s ruling on DOMA was incredible, no doubt: a turning point, a tipping point, a critical mass, and everything else we say when we’re trying to figure out where exactly we are in the great span of LGBT history. At the same time, we also know that the Court stopped short of recognizing full equality for gay and lesbian people and that half of us live in places where same-sex marriage is about as likely as Michelle Bachmann joining PFLAG to, you know, support Marcus. Anybody who professes to understand definitively what it all means for our future is probably doing it with a Magic 8 Ball. Please bear with me, then, while I complicate things a bit more. The Court didn’t strike down DOMA, no matter what CNN said repeatedly. Only section 3 was nixed, which defines marriage as between a man and woman for federal purposes. But section 2, absolving states from having to recognize same-sex marriages that happened

in other states, is alive and well, for now. Back in 1996, it was this provision that everybody talked about. And section 2 is still significant because, historically, states have almost always recognized marriages that are legal in other states regardless of differing marriage laws in those states. For example, if you married your 15-year-old cousin in State X and then moved to State Y, which doesn’t do that sort of thing, State Y would still treat you as married. By contrast, at this moment, DOMA allows non-equality states to ignore legal same-sex marriages performed in places like California (yay!), Iowa or Maine. Yet, the media and even the Court acted as if DOMA was over. I can think of two reasons for the double-talk. First, technically speaking, section 2 was redundant. States always had the right to ignore marriages performed elsewhere, despite long tradition (and the Full Faith and Credit clause, for you law wonks keeping score). Even in ‘96, this part of DOMA always struck me as more of a statement of back-assward principle than real law. Remember that there were no gay marriages back then, but Congress, seeing a fight ahead, passed DOMA

A lesson in sharing the road Courtesy of the San Diego County Bicycle Coalition What are sharrows? Sharrows, shorthand for Shared Lane Markings, are state-approved, 40-inch-wide, white bicycle images with two forward pointing arrows painted on some streets. Where are sharrows? • Sharrows are painted on streets primarily where a travel lane is too narrow for side-by-side sharing: too narrow for motorists to safely drive next to bicyclists within the same lane. • Sharrows were recently installed all the way down 30th Street, from Normal Heights into Golden Hill, in advance of CicloSDias on Aug. 11 and can now also be found in Encinitas, Leucadia, Solana Beach and Oceanside in North County, as well as the San Diego communities of Ocean Beach, Point Loma and Downtown. As need arises sharrows will be used in more places. Why are there sharrows? • Sharrows recommend where it is generally safest for PUBLISHER David Mannis (619) 961-1951


EDITOR Anthony King (619) 961-1952

ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Sheri Hayeland (619) 961-1957

ASSISTANT EDITOR Morgan M. Hurley (619) 961-1960

Sloan Gomez (619) 961-1954

ART DIRECTOR Rebecah Corbin (619) 961-1961 PRODUCTION ASSISTANT Vincent Berling

ACCOUNTING Priscilla Umel-Martinez (619) 961-1962

Mike Rosensteel (619) 961-1958

Kyle Renwick (619) 961-1957 Yana Shayne (619) 961-1963

SALES & MARKETING SPECIALIST Isabelle Estrella (619) 961-1958

anyway. It served to let states off the moral hook for discriminating against gay people if ever they had to choose. Seventeen years later, in Windsor v. United States, the Court called this thinking out for exactly what it was: “DOMA’s principal effect is to identify a subset of state-sanctioned marriages and make them unequal,” which is bad. Period. Oh, and by the way, DOMA is still law. Wait… what? This leads me to the second reason everyone’s acting like DOMA is gone, gone, gone. To be fair, I can’t blame the Court for its schizoid half-ruling, as Edie Windsor didn’t bring suit about section 2. Given this limitation, the Court intentionally went as far as it possibly could without engaging in legal overreach (though conservatives are still squawking about overreach). But it will come as no surprise to anyone, least of all Justice Kennedy, who penned the opinion, that the language the Court uses for striking down section 3 will subsequently be used, very persuasively, by people challenging section 2 and every other state-level miniDOMA that comes before the courts. Even archconservative Justice Scalia

bicyclists to ride, positioned toward the middle of a lane. This position reminds bicyclists to ride far enough away from parked vehicles to avoid being struck by suddenly opened car doors. • Sharrows also guide bicyclists toward the center of the lane to discourage unsafe passing within the same lane by motor vehicles. • Sharrows serve to alert motorists that bicyclists may be using the full travel lane. To pass a bicyclist who is using a full lane or a lane with sharrows, a motorist should wait for a safe opportunity to move entirely into an adjacent lane. • Additionally, “Bicycles May Use Full Lane” signs remind all of us that people have the right to use the full travel lane, using a bicycle or a vehicle. What is a bike lane? A bike lane is a part of a roadway marked by a solid white line and frequent bicycle symbols and arrows painted along many streets. Bike lanes are usually accompanied by “Bike Lane” signs. Where are bike lanes? Bike lanes are usually to the right of travel lanes, but sometimes between the rightmost through-only lane and a SALES INTERNS Charlie Bryan Baterina Martina Long CONTRIBUTORS

Chris Azzopardi Blake Beckcom Gwen Beckcom Logan Broyles Max Disposti Dae Elliott Anna Frost Lisa Keen Michael Kimmel Manny Lopez Paul McGuire Ian Morton Jeff Praught Caleb Rainey Frank Sabatini Jr. Romeo San Vincente

OPINIONS/LETTERS Gay San Diego encourages letters to the editor and guest editorials. Please email both to Include phone number and address for verification. We reserve the right to edit letters and editorials for brevity and accuracy. Letters should be no longer than 350 words in length unless approved by staff editors. Letters and guest editorials do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher or staff. SUBMISSIONS/NEWS TIPS Press releases and story ideas are welcome. Send press releases, tips, photos or story ideas to For breaking news and investigative story ideas contact the editor by phone or email. DISTRIBUTION GAY San Diego is distributed free, biweekly, every other Friday. COPYRIGHT 2013. All rights are reserved.

agrees with me, and this is my favorite Supreme Court bonus factoid ever. Given the unusual combination of hysteria and defeatism in his dissenting opinion, it’s not hard to imagine him jumping off the roof of the Supreme Court building as a final declaration. Notwithstanding his misery, Scalia has probably figured out what comes next better than any pundit has, with more convincing logic than even within the majority opinion. Our victory is “inevitable,” he proclaims, and as easy substituting “DOMA” with any kind of marriage ban and applying the Court’s same reasoning: “Henceforth those challengers will lead with this Court’s declaration that there is ‘no legitimate purpose’ served by such a law, and will claim that the traditional definition has ‘the purpose and effect to disparage and to injure’ the ‘personhood and dignity’ of same-sex couples.” Exactly. Thank you, Justice, for mapping out our road ahead so clearly. —Abby is a civil rights attorney-turned-author who has been in the LGBT rights trenches for over 25 years. She can be reached through her website at

right-turn-only lane. How should we use bike lanes? • Vehicles may not normally be driven or parked in bike lanes, however motorists are to yield to bicyclists before entering or making a turn across a bike lane. • Bicyclists must normally use a bike lane when traveling slower than other traffic, but may leave the bike lane to avoid hazards such as to get away from the right hook zone, when approaching an intersection with a road, alley or driveway, or to prepare for a left turn. • Bicyclists must yield to overtaking traffic in the next lane before leaving the bike lane. • Bike lanes are dashed or terminated before intersections so that bicyclists and motorists are reminded to merge into the appropriate lanes and lane positions for their respective destinations. Ride and share safely! The San Diego Bicycle Coalition is the organizer for the Aug. 11 CicloSDias event, where 5.2 miles of roads will be available for non-motorized use from 10 a.m. – 4 p.m. For complete information visit For more information about the Coalition visit

3737 Fifth Ave. Suite 201 San Diego, CA 92103 (619) 519-7775

Business Improvement Association


GAY NEWS BRIEFS GAY MEN’S CHORUS DONATES TO VETERANS San Diego Gay Men’s Chorus (SDGMC) members donated more than $2,300 and 40 boxes of clothing to the Veterans Village of San Diego following their summer concert “Feeling Groovy – Songs of the ‘60s.” The donation was part of the nonprofit choral group’s community outreach mission, and was raised through audience participation and a summer-long clothing drive at the University Christian Church in Hillcrest. “On any given day, more than 500 veterans find a helping hand at the Veterans Village,” said SDGMC Director of Outreach Marc Mangiantini in a press release. “We’re proud to be a part of the amazing work they do to improve the lives of the men and women who served our country.” Now in its third year, past SDGMC community outreach include fundraising efforts for children, women and individuals who are homeless, as well as Mama’s Kitchen. The next information night for new SDGMC members is scheduled for Sept. 4. Interested individuals can visit or call 877-296-7664. SPECIAL DELIVERY BREAKS FUNDRAISING RECORD Special Delivery San Diego’s LGBT Pride BBQ event, held this year on July 13 at Inn at the Park, raised over $10,000, breaking the annual event’s all-time record, representatives from Special Delivery said in a press release. Special Delivery, a non-profit organization that packages and delivers nutritious meals and groceries to people in San Diego living with HIV, AIDS and other life-threatening illnesses, has held the BBQ for over 15 years. Executive Director Ruth Henricks extended her thanks in the release to the community, Inn at the Park and this year’s corporate sponsors Pecs Bar, Kaiser Permanente, The Loft Bar, California Bank & Trust and Hillcrest Pharmacy. For more information about Special Delivery, including volunteer opportunities, call 619-297-7373. SANDERS BRUNCH WILL RAISE MONEY FOR LGBT LIBRARY COLLECTION Former Mayor Jerry Sanders is being honored at a brunch in the private home of Bruce Abrams on Sunday, Aug. 11. Abrams is joining Library Commissioner Susan Atkins and Nicole Murray Ramirez

in honoring Sanders “for his vision and work to make the dream come true: The City of San Diego’s iconic new Central Library,” an invite stated. The library is scheduled to open September, and Atkins is leading a campaign called the LGBT Initiative to provide resources for and about the LGBT community in the library’s permanent collection. The brunch also serves as a fundraiser for the campaign, and is $500 per person or $750 per couple. All donations will go to the LGBT initiative, and organizers are encouraging those who cannot attend Sunday’s brunch, which begins at 10:30 a.m., to make a donation online at To RSVP or for more information contact Atkins at DUMANIS TO RECEIVE SPECIAL NICKY AWARD District Attorney Bonnie Dumanis will be honored with the Mayor George Moscone Memorial Award at this year’s Nicky Awards. Police Chief William Lansdowne and Sheriff Bill Gore will present Dumanis with the award. The 38th annual ceremony will be held Aug. 25 at 6 p.m. at the Marriott Mission Valley. “The Nicky Awards Board of Governors announced Dumanis as the recipient of this year’s Mayor Moscone Award because of her being a national role model of a top elected law enforcement official with a record of integrity, fairness and leadership,” organizers said in a press release. Nicky Awards President Allan Spyere said Dumanis is a “true role model” for young women and LGBT youth. “Bonnie Dumanis has been an outstanding and dedicated public servant, both as a Superior Court Judge and now as District Attorney,” Spyere said. Voting in several categories for this year’s Awards is now open. For more information and tickets, visit HBA STARTS SUSTAINABILITY FOCUS AT CITYFEST This year’s Hillcrest Business Association-run CityFest held Sunday, Aug. 11 will see the organization’s initial steps toward creating a more sustainable event, a focus of the newly formed Sustainability Committee. HBA board member Nicholas Papantonakis and HBA Sponsorship + Concessions Manager Cassandra Ramhap outlined first steps in the process at the committee’s regularly scheduled July meeting, held July 16. This year’s CityFest will include a free, secure bicycle corral on Robinson Avenue hosted by the 1:1 Movement. Co-founder Amanda Tatum attended the July meeting, and

the committee agreed the bicycle corral would be a good addition to CityFest considering the bicyclefocused CicloSDias event scheduled for the same day. Additionally, the HBA has partnered with Totes Upcycled to give away reusable bags at this year’s CityFest, made from recycled T-shirts. “Urban neighborhoods have an obligation to be environmental leaders,” said HBA Executive Director Benjamin Nicholls. “It’s important that Hillcrest analyzes all its efforts to become more sustainable. We’re starting with our events.” The committee will also be addressing sustainability options at the Hillcrest Farmer’s Market, and is open to all interested members. The group meets the third Tuesday of each month at 2:30 p.m. at the HBA office, located at 3737 Fifth Ave. For more information call 619-299-3330. LATINO FILM FESTIVAL POSTER CONTEST ANNOUNCED North Park’s Media Arts Center San Diego is now accepting submission for their fifth annual Film Festival Poster competition. Individuals, collaborative teams or firms are asked to submit their designs for next year’s 21st annual San Diego Latino Film Festival, which will take place March 13 – 23, 2014. The competition is open to all artists and graphic designers, with no cost to submit. Multiple submissions will be accepted through Oct. 31. “We are looking for images that depict Latin American Cinema in an interesting, relevant and visually innovative way that avoids stereotypes and clichés,” organizers said. Criteria include overall impact for eye-catching appeal, clarity in the message, appropriateness of the graphics and creativity. Entries may be in the form of photography, painting, graphic art and illustration, in color or black and white, organizers said. For the complete guidelines, including images of previous submissions, visit or email DESERT ROSE RELEASES NEW SEASON LINEUP The Desert Rose Playhouse located in the Coachella Valley announced their 2013-14 season, which will include “two wild comedies, one Gothic Creole mystery, a world-premiere drama drawn from today’s headlines and a very special Mid-Century Modern musical,” organizers said. “House of the Rising Sun” by Tom Jacobson opens the season Sept. 27 – Oct. 27, followed by “The Most Fabulous

see Briefs, pg 10

GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013


(l to r) GSDBA board member Danielle Barger, Council President Todd Gloria and former CEO Tom Luhnow at this year’s Business Awards luncheon held June 20 (Photo by Erin Penwell / Ash & Arrow Photography) FROM PAGE 1

GSDBA what we’re doing.’ That is what was exciting to me,” he said. “They were empowered to say what their voice was and they all agreed.” Brown also said the unexpected departure of a GSDBA staff member triggered a “ver y close analysis” of the overall management of staff, and added that annual performance reviews of ever y position are standard practice and part of the board’s responsibility in setting policy and direction. “It’s not up to the people that are paid to determine direction, it is up to the membership and the membership dictates who’s leading through voting and through service,” he said. The board currently consists of 15 members, and Brown said two more will soon make the total 17. He called the 750- to 850-member organization “complex” because of the wide range of career fields and business types involved in its make-up. “My job as the chair is to take all that creativity and thinking and passion, and work with them in creating coherent policies, and beyond that, create something that serves the membership, makes it grow and grows our reserves and our ability to serve them in a whole host of ways,” he said. Social media “changed the landscape” for GSDBA, Brown said, as it has for many other organizations, and they needed to adapt to that new landscape. Right now that adaptation has shifted to searching for a new CEO and finalizing their 2014 business directory, set for a Jan. 1 publication. “[The directory] is the stamp of ‘I stand for diversity,’ ‘I stand for the gay and lesbian community,’ and ‘I stand for fairness,’” he said. “It is the directory people need to be visible in, especially this year with marriage [equality]. We’re even having a special wedding section.” Brown, who served with the Portland Area Business Association in Portland, Ore. in the 1990s, has been a member of the GSDBA since 2003 and on the board since 2006. He became board chair in December of last year, and called the annual business directory his own personal “center of gravity,” and a resource that makes its consumers “feel safe.” “That’s what really this chamber’s about,” he said. “It’s about creating safety in the workplace and workplace equality and all of those issues.” Brown encouraged those interested in the CEO position to email their resume to him at “I think people are looking for change and this is a great position to have, because this is a board that wants someone to take the reigns of day-to-day leadership and drive it,” he said. “I’m really excited about that possibility.” For more information about the GSDBA, their workshops, the monthly open board meetings at Top of the Park, or the search process, visit or call 619-296-4543.t


SUMMER HUNKS Across 1 Israeli author Oz 5 Mushroom source 10 Greet Pat Robertson 14 That’s bull, to Frida 15 She came between Bess and Jackie 16 Hit the ground 17 Armchair athlete’s channel 18 Writer Dykewomon 19 “Now ___ me down to sleep ...” 20 “Step Up” star 23 Flew high 24 Murdoch with a flower? 26 Lodging place 27 Things to consider 31 Snaky shape 32 Bowling lane button 34 Home state of J. Nabors 35 Select from the menu 37 Captain Kirk portrayer 40 Judy Garland concert persona

43 Civil War side 44 Pink Triangle Press publication 48 Game with “Reverse” cards 49 Feeler 51 One of Lee’s men 52 Fruit with a peel 54 Paths of Uranus and others 56 “Man of Steel” star 60 Mendicant’s self-description? 62 Socrates’ market 63 Seep slowly 66 Spot for gay honeymoons 67 Celestial ice ball 68 Opposed to, to Jethrene Bodine 69 Scores for Patty Sheehan 70 Remove a slip? 71 “Equal justice under law,” to homophobes

Summer Hunks solution on page 21 Down 1 Went down on 2 George once of San Francisco 3 Broadway Annie, and others 4 Source of waves at sea 5 Changes a bill 6 “___ Hai” of “South Pacific” 7 Muscat site 8 Dynasty long before the Carringtons 9 Song about loving yourself? 10 Caribbean republic 11 Manhandled 12 Like the tutees in “Anna and the King” 13 Filthy digs 21 Like a bottom 22 Flaming queen’s activity? 23 Title for Elton 25 Old letters from Russia? 28 A stripper takes it off 29 De Wolfe of design 30 Food fowl

33 “The Name of the Rose” writer 36 Title for Oedipus 38 Emulate George Frenn 39 Do pioneer work 40 Dupont Circle of D.C., e.g. 41 “Put ___ Happy Face” 42 Animal painter Rosa 45 Torch song threesome 46 Living in Fla., perhaps 47 Tummy muscles 49 Sothern of old TV 50 Jackie O.’s second husband 53 Sponsorship 55 Puff up 57 “Son of Frankenstein” character 58 Time out? 59 Deity on _Xena_ 60 Shakespeare’s Puck, e.g. 61 Ewe said it! 64 Fly on a guy 65 Bowie collaborator


GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013


Deep, lasting friendships

MICHAEL KIMMEL LIFE BEYOND THERAPY Last week I was talking with my best friend. As usual, we covered a wide range of subjects. He brought up friendship and suggested I write a column about it, telling me: “Friendship is severely underrated in the LGBT community, especially among men.” Additionally, a client of mine told me, “Boyfriends come and go, but friendships last a lot longer. I’d be sunk without my friends.” What is a friend? Here are some definitions I like: someone who loves you and who you love. Someone you respect, trust and enjoy spending time with. Someone who forgives you, tries to help you when you need it, and tells you when you’re being stupid without making you feel stupid.

And my favorite definition: someone it’s OK to fart in front of. I asked my best friend why we are still friends after meeting 22 years ago. “We have a core appreciation of each other, despite our differences,” he said. You may not agree with a friend or like what they say. You may even think they sound like an idiot on a given subject, but you still respect them. In a friendship, mutual intimacy invites openness, vulnerability and feeling accepted. A friend told me that he used to be afraid of being intimate and vulnerable, but decided to risk it: “I was afraid to let people really see me. But I realized, what do I have to lose? I’m already sad and lonely. I want friends.” Good friendships have depth. There is more to your relationship than common interests or similar personalities. There is history, understanding and acceptance. You’ve seen them at their worst – and vice versa – and you still love each other anyway. What do you want from a friend? It’s good to be clear about this. As we move through life, we usually want different things at different times from friends. What you want from your friends at age 27 is probably quite different from what you want at age 72. Or not. Making friends is a risk-taking activity. People may reject you. People may flake out on you. People may not be who they pres-

ent on first meeting. So what else is new? Making and cultivating friends is a process that unfolds over time. We’re all bound to go through some bad matches before we get to solid gold. Real friendships grow slowly. Too many of us scare potential friends away by telling them too much, too fast. Slowly open up to someone: if you feel safe and appreciated, a budding friendship may begin. If you feel uncomfortable or anxious, this person may not be right for you. Lasting friendships have realistic expectations. Like you, your friends screw up from time to time. Like you, they don’t always say the right things or show up when you need them. All friendships go through rough times. No matter how much you love each other, friends inevitably get on each other’s nerves. What do you do about it? Give up and dump them, or hang in and work it out? To cultivate great friendships • Keep your word and do what you say. • Pay attention. If you’re texting or checking out everyone who walks by while a friend spills her or his guts to you, you are not paying attention. • Friends have to be able to say, “Yes, I can do this for you.” or “No, I can’t.” It’s normal for a friendship’s boundaries to shift

over time as adjustments are made by both of you. How to screw up a friendship • Lying, backstabbing or manipulating. Or all three. • Expecting a friend to read your mind. • Unattended friendships die like neglected flowers. On the other hand, an obsessive friendship sucks the life out of you. We may only need one partner, but we sure need more than one friend. I think everyone needs two or three intimate friends, some friends to just hang out with, and lots of friendly acquaintances. I invite you to examine what you want from your friends and then experiment. See what you have to give and receive, and allow your friendships to unfold. You might be surprised how much deep, intimate friendships can change your life. They sure have changed mine. —Michael Kimmel is a licensed psychotherapist who specializes in helping LGBT clients achieve their goals and deal with anxiety, depression, grief, sexually addictive behavior, coming out, relationship challenges and homophobia. Michael is currently accepting new clients. Contact him at 619-955-3311 or visit FROM PAGE 9

BRIEFS Story Ever Told” by Paul Rudnick Nov. 15 – Dec. 22. “Nite Club Confidential” by Dennis Deal runs Jan. 10 – Feb. 16, 2014; “Poster Boys” by Dan Clancy runs March 21 – April 20, 2014; and the season closes with “The Haunted Host” by Robert Patrick May 2 – June 1, 2014. Performances are Fridays and Saturdays at 8 p.m., with Sunday matinees at 2 p.m. The Playhouse is a project of Desert Rose Productions, Inc., whose mission is to produce relevant and entertaining plays of interest to LGBT and ally theatergoers. The theater is located in Cathedral City, Calif. Season ticket holders can reserve their performances starting Aug. 26, and single tickets for “House of the Rising Sun” go on sale Sept. 3. For more information visit or call 760-202-3000. ART WALK ON THE BAY CHANGES NAME, VENUE AND DATES Mission Federal’s Art Walk on the Bay, which for the last seven years has been held in September on the grass straddling the Convention Center and the Hilton San Diego Bayfront Downtown, has found a new home. Now called ArtWalk @NTC, the popular art and music festival has moved to Liberty Station and will take place Aug. 24 and 25 from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. A “sister” event to the annual Mission Federal ArtWalk held in Little Italy each spring, ArtWalk @NTC will remain free to all ages but promises “an even higher caliber of artists in a more intimate setting,” said a press release. Attendees can expect more than 100 local and internationally known visual artists, a dozen musicians performing more than 16 hours of live music, and a variety of interactive art exhibitions all converging upon the new NTC Art & Culture district located at 2645 Historic Decatur Rd. at Liberty Station in Point Loma. KidsWalk will also return, as well as a large variety of unique cuisine and parking will also be free. For more information, visit RELAY FOR LIFE TO RUN THROUGH DOWNTOWN The American Cancer Society’s 24-hour fundraiser for cancer research is returning to Downtown San Diego this month at the Seaport Village’s North Embarcadero, located at 849 West Harbor Dr. The annual event allows participants to celebrate their own survival, connect with others, honor those who are currently fighting the battle or have been lost, and at the same time, raise money to help fight the disease moving forward. Started in 1985 in Tacoma, Wash., Relay For Life is now a worldwide event happening in communities across the world. San Diego’s event will kick off on Aug. 17 with opening ceremonies at 9 a.m. which will be followed by a “survivor’s lap” at 9:30 a.m. The overnight community fundraising walk, which will end at 9 a.m. Aug. 18, will consist of various teams camping out next to the Relay For Life track whose members each take turns walking around the track during the 24-hour period. Food, games and activities will be provided for participants. A candlelit procession, called the “Luminaria Ceremony” at 8:30 p.m. will allow participants to honor loved ones who have lost their battle or are currently fighting the disease. For more information or to sign up, call 619-318-1330 or visit and enter 92101.t


Because art should imitate life:

San Diego Multicultural LGBT Literary Foundation


PROFILES IN ADVOCACY This month, I have the opportunity to talk about the marriage of two of my favorite things: a newly emerging nonprofit and literature. The San Diego Multicultural LGBT Literary Foundation (MLLF) has taken on the enormous task of pushing the field of literature to accurately reflect the LGBT population in a visceral way. The first piece of the puzzle I researched was the prevalence of LGBT literature available without regard to gender, race and ethnicity, or trans/cisgender characters. There is not much published research in this area and I could only find one

2011 study by young adult author Malina Lo. Her data shows that approximately 0.6 percent of young adult novels published between 1969 and 2011 contain a primary LGBT character, with 50 percent of those characters being boys, 25 percent girls and less than 4 percent transgender or genderqueer. Additionally, my own look shows that of the 1.75 million book titles offered on, only about 2,900 are labeled LGBT. With 2011 Williams Institute review estimating approximately 4 percent of the United States population self-identifying as LGBT, and an additional percentage claiming same-sex attraction, we see a serious disconnect with the ratio between the community and its inclusion in the written lexicon. To further illustrate the lack of equality is the disproportionate number of authors from communities of color represented in this very small sub-genre of literature. LGBT titles are dominated by white, male authors that write, in large, about the white, gay male experience. When I sat down with MLLF founder Caleb Rainey and treasurer Stephany Farley, we began to unravel why this was the case and what they planned to do to balance the scales. Rainey was just finishing his graduate studies at San Diego State University when the concept of addressing the lack of LGBT stories from communities of color began germinating into an action plan. His love of reading and the dif-

ficulty in finding both older novels from authors still in print and the development of new talent planted the question of “Why is the LGBT lexicon not representing the community in its fullness?” This passion led to the formation of the group in November 2012.

"The goal of this group is to use literature as a foundation for discussions of the socio-economic and political reality of those that exist outside of the LGBT mainstream." We talked a bit about the three “big” end results of the foundation’s efforts, and Rainey described the first: to promote the increase of creation and preservation of books by LGBT authors of color. This includes increasing visibility and promotion of current and past authors, bringing out-of-print titles back into circulation and providing a space and time for these authors to create. The bulk of LGBT authors of color are simultaneously attempting to create their art while holding

down a fulltime job, which hampers their ability to write at the same pace as their Caucasian male counterparts. One of the eventual action goals of the Foundation is to have a retreat for these authors to have the time of uninterrupted focus on their craft, he said. Farley also remarked on the goal of having these authors available to youth and young adults through their schools. “If [students] were exposed to someone like them that they could relate to, there is a better chance of them getting into literature and learning their history,” she said. A second goal is to address racism and homophobia through literature, and have a more accurate representation of the full scope of the LGBT population throughout. When I inquired as to the disconnect between the actual and perceived LGBT community, Rainey had the following to offer: “There is a representation of ‘us’ as white and middle class and/or a requirement for the people of color that are admitted to positions of power to conform to white middle-class standards of dress and speech,” he said. Through his advocacy and activism, Rainey has found that in discussions about issues within the LGBT community, the white male experience seems to be the dominant voice when issues are addressed. Recognizing that in San Diego, the LGBT community expands far beyond the central communities of Hillcrest, North Park and University Heights, is also an important component to be understood. Thirdly, Rainey and Farley would like to eventually open a nonprofit bookstore in San Diego that specializes in LGBT authors of color. Currently, their partnership with Bluestocking Books has created

GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013


a first home for the titles that the foundation promotes through their reading group, which discusses a new title each month on the first and third Sunday at 7 p.m. The goal of this group is to use literature as a foundation for discussions of the socio-economic and political reality of those that exist outside of the LGBT “mainstream,” Rainey said. This month’s selection is “Yes Means Yes!,” available at Bluestocking Books, 3817 Fifth Ave. Farley and I chatted a bit about LGBT writing from a woman’s perspective. In the already small niche market of LGBT authors of color, women’s voices are far too absent. Issues such as lesbians forced to be primary breadwinners, and the fact that much of the women’s movement is chronicled through poetry – a difficult genre to promote – rather than prose or fiction, are aspects that the foundation looks to address. To get more involved with the foundation, find out more about their efforts and discover ways to support these authors follow them at or email Editor’s note: Caleb Rainey is a regular columnist for Gay San Diego. In Out on the Page, Rainey discusses the themes of the upcoming Multicultural LGBT Book Club’s selection. —Ian Morton has worked in the HIV field since 1994 when he began volunteering with AIDS Response Knoxville. He currently serves as outreach liaison for the AIDS Research Institute at UCSD. To nominate a person or organization to be featured in Profiles in Advocacy, please submit name, affiliation and contact information to



GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013

“Salame al cioccolato” for dessert

Dining with

(Photo by Frank Sabatini Jr.)


Basil-eggplant ravioli with tomatoes (Photo by Frank Sabatini Jr.)

Solare Ristorante | 2820 Roosevelt Road (Liberty Station) | 619-270-9670 Dinner prices: Salads and starters, $7 to $16; pasta, pizzas and entrees, $13 to $54


t was the first upscale restaurant to appear in Liberty Station and the only Italian restaurant in San Diego stamped with rich furnishings and fabrics from the South Pacific. Since emerging five years ago in this historic parcel of land, the 4,000-square-foot Solare Ristorante has changed its culinary slant from Milanese to Sicilian after switching ownership last year. But the lustrous tiger-wood flooring, high-back teak chairs and other custom-made appointments, all imported from Bali by the original proprietors, remain in aesthetic defiance of a place celebrating Italy’s gustatory pleasures. “We wanted to keep the best of what the previous owners had and make it better,” said Randy Smerik, who earned enough seed money as an entrepreneur in the high-tech industry to purchase the restaurant. In doing so, he recruited his sons into the business: Tommy as a mixologist and Brian as sous chef. Along the way, he re-energized the atmosphere with live jazz on Thursdays and other weekly events that include cooking classes and wine tastings. Smerik also hired Sicilian native Accursio Lota as executive chef to create an entirely new menu showcasing Southern Italian recipes common within his family. For dishes like eggplant-basil ravioli and “guitar”

spaghetti with sea urchin, Lota makes the pastas from scratch. In addition, the catch of the day is served whole with olives and fresh herbs. Pizzas are made with Italian stone-ground flour while even the sea salt sprinkled into his cooking hails from the motherland. Visiting on jazz Thursday, we relinquished our table in the lounge for a quieter one in the main dining room. For drinks and appetizers only, listening to the crisp, Count Basie-style band at close range would have been swell. But we had a full slate of meal courses to discuss. Starting with house-made chicken liver pâté appearing on bruschetta all Mano, we nonetheless expressed shouts of pleasure to each other over the chef’s keen ability to cook like a Frenchman. The pâté nurtured our mouths with a creamy, unctuous flavor rivaling pure butter, much like the chicken liver mousse I’ve come to love at Farm House Café in University Heights. The dish also featured oven-fresh focaccia with sweet eggplant caponata and a memorable tapenade combining fruity figs and salty black olives. I couldn’t wait to poke my fork into Lota’s meatballs, which is actually a recipe from his grandmother. Served three to an order, they’re constructed with a 50-50 mix of veal

and beef along with pieces of milk-soaked bread, an old Italian trick that gives the meat a soft, smooth texture. Another starter featured the return of molecular gastronomy with lovely basil foam shot tableside onto a trio of jumbo seared scallops that were perfectly crispy on the outside and evenly pearly all the way through. Despite the wane of such foams, I still don’t mind a little froth on my plate, especially when seafood is involved. A few pasta dishes followed. The pappardelle noodles with artichokes and crumbled fennel sausage sported the kind of melt-in-your mouth texture achieved only when they’re house-made, such as these slender ribbons. It’s a substantial dish compared to the more delicate ravioli filled with basil-spiked eggplant and topped with semiaged ricotta or those stuffed with spinach and younger ricotta. The latter were draped in butter sauce that was flavored rather strongly with sage. For our main entrée, we shared filet of tilefish in a broth of clam juice, artichokes and smoked garlic. It was the perfect stage for tilefish, which offers a soft flavor and firm texture, much like sea bass. Several fingerling potatoes alongside provide a judicious balance of starch, should you skip any of the midcourse pasta dishes. But why bother, given

the chef’s intrinsic knack for making them? This is definitely one of those Italian restaurants worth going carb-crazy for a night. The menu also features a few cuts of West Coast Angus beef served with seasonal veggies and a “rustic salad” from local organic farms. The 24-ounce Tomahawk rib eye ($54) reigns as the most expensive item on the menu and takes 40 minutes to prepare. But whether you’re waiting for that giant steak to cook or lounging between courses, Solare’s wine list easily distracts with a growing inventory that will soon expand to six pages. All of the wines originate from either the United States or Italy. You’ll also find a decent selection of Italian dessert wines that pair without fail to homemade Sicilian cannoli and “salame al cioccolato,” which looks like round slices of dark sausage (chocolate brownie) speckled with fat globules (light-colored cookie crumbs). Lacking frescos and Italian flags, the food at Solare effectively transports you to Italy while exposing you unexpectedly to some beautiful design elements of Southeast Asia along the way.t


GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013




GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013

GET YOUR Fabulous Hillcrest FIX AT CityFest • CityFest NIGHT presents DJs and dancing under the Hillcrest sign starting at dusk with DJs Nikno, Dirty KURTY, Will Z, and John Joseph SunSun day, Aug. 11 - More info at or • CityFest is extending its curfew for the second year in a row with DJs, dancing, and lights. Meet under the Hillcrest sign at noon and stay until 11 PM! • Celebrate 29 years of CityFest, the iconic Hillcrest sign and neighborhood spirit on Sunday, Aug. 11 from noon to 11 PM. Meet at University Avenue and Fifth Avenue and let the day carry you into night at this year's expanded festival.

• CityFest DAY: live music with San Diego’s best bands, including Mimi Zulu, Mad Traffic, and Tori Roze & the Hot Mess. Walk the streets with over 300 artisians + crafters, a water park, rides + our signature beer garden on the urban streets of Hillcrest! • Ride your bike to CityFest this year and park it safely in our 1:1 Movement Bike Corral and Valet! Cycle over to Robinson Avenue and then be sure to find Totes Upcycled who will be giving away reusable tote bags to help move away from single use products! •Furry Fosters is joining CityFest this year to help save canine lives! And you can too! Find the Pet

Adoption Corral and even find the newes

• For all your City tion needs, downloa an ing lot, locate bike s

• For more inform official event web si like us on Facebook mation on the HBA

Chee City

GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013

Grand Stage line up Laura Jane, MC 12–12:50 p.m.……………………. The Tighten Ups 1–1:50 p.m..…………………….….. Tori Roze & The Hot Mess 2–2:50 p.m..…………………….….. Royal Heart 3–3:50 p.m..…………………….….. Mad Traffic 4–4:50 p.m..…………………….….. Mimi Zulu 5–5:50 p.m..…………………….….. HOTT Thing 6 p.m....…………………….………….... DJ Will Z 7:15 p.m....………………….……...... John Joseph 8:30 p.m....…………….…………...... DJ Dirty KURTY 9:45 p.m....…………….…………...... Nikno

t 2013!

Furry Fosters Pet Adoption Area Featuring a Pet Adoption Corral with the cutest cuddly additions to CityFest

d get your puppy fix, you might st member of your family.

yFest parking and transportaad the Park Hillcrest App or visit nd track the shuttle, find a parksupport or assess parking rates!

CityFest Night

DJs past sunset, spinning into the night until 11 PM. Tori Roze & the Hot Mess

Royal Heart

Mad Traffic

Mimi Zulu

HOTT Thing

1–1:50 pm

2–2:50 pm

3–3:50 pm

4–4:50 pm

5–5:50 pm

Kids Pavilion The Rad Hatter is back this year with all the supplies you need to make your own CityFest inspired hat. You'll also find tons of games and rides for the whole family at the Kids Pavilion.

mation on CityFest please visit the ite at and For more inforplease visit

ers and Happy yFest 2013!

SDPIX Water Park

Keep cool at the SDPIX Water Slide all day!

1:1 Movement Bike Corral & Valet DJ Will Z



6 pm

8:30 pm

9:45 pm

Bike to CityFest and meet the 1:1 Movement at Robinson Avenue, your bike will be safe and sound all day long!



GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013



GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013


Independence Day After a year off, IndieFest is back and better than ever By Logan Broyles | GSD Reporter For the better part of the last decade, Danielle LoPresti and Alicia Champion have been the face of San Diego’s independent culture with their creation, IndieFest. But all of that almost came to an end when LoPresti was diagnosed with a rare form of Stage 3 cancer in seven different places throughout her body this past winter. With LoPresti now in remission and things looking clear, IndieFest 8 is ready for its triumphant return after a one-year hiatus. The three-day festival comes to the NTC Promenade at Liberty Station Friday, Aug. 16 – 18. This will be the eighth time that the festival has been held in the last nine years, with 2011 being its first year at Liberty Station after previously taking over the streets of Bankers Hill and North Park. The new location is six times bigger than the previous. After fighting through some serious trials and tribulations, the pair have come back with full steam and are ready to pull off what has become the largest local festival that focuses on all things indie. It will also be the biggest IndieFest to date, with six different stages spread throughout Liberty Station. The popular event does more than just promote lesser known bands and filmmakers; it aims to touch on ever ything it can within the indie culture, from independent artists, music and film, as well as businesses and nonprofits. “We feel really passionate about turning people on to the

truly remarkable art and revolutionar y ideas that are happening in their own city that they just don’t know about because these entities are usually totally underfunded,” LoPresti said. “There’s no money plastering what they’re doing on billboards or making sure their products are right in front of you in line at the grocer y store so they go relatively unknown and are relatively broke, even though the art and the work that they’re doing is fantastic and really important to the local community,” she said. With over 1,500 submissions for this year’s festival, Champion and LoPresti had their hands full sorting through it all, and they’re very proud of the final lineup of over 75 artists. In addition to the couple’s band LoPresti and The Masses, five other LGBT artists and bands will perform this year: groundbreaking, out artist and YouTube sensation Steve Grand, James Marsters with Ghost of the Robot, Saucy Monky, Kevin Wood and Whitton. Lesbian folk singer Ferron was scheduled to perform, but had to cancel due to “health ailments,” representatives said. The schedule also features a broad spectrum of musical acts, from headliners Cake and rapper Talib Kweli to bands Best Coast, The Heavy Guilt, Todo Mundo and Katie Leigh & The Infantry. Everything from country and folk, to poetry will be included, and there is even a night dedicated solely to EDM and electronica music on Friday, with a headlining performance by DJ PhuturePrimitive. LoPresti said their goal is to have a couple bands on the bill

“that really excite you” along with several other indie bands, artists or nonprofits that you’ll walk away “totally stoked about.” IndieFest started back in 2004 as only a one-day event. The original mission – which still holds true today – was to create a sense of community among independent artists and help them share their resources so that they could get their work out to the public. “The idea that if you’ve heard of a band, they’re god, and if you haven’t heard of them then they aren’t that good, is totally false and it’s one of our biggest goals to prove that at IndieFest,” LoPresti said. For Champion and LoPresti, IndieFest is part of a larger struggle to preser ve the local arts and culture of the city. They want to do their part to support the features that make this city unique. “I think most people generally love and appreciate a sense of culture [where they live],” LoPresti said. “All of that is more important than having the same corporations and the same bands in ever y city across the countr y. There’s something special that only exists in San Diego, and if we don’t support the independent arts and culture, it’s going to go away.” The promoters said they fully appreciate the diversity of the event and the crowd it attracts and that is reflected in their headliners.

Out artist Steve Grand performs Aug. 17 at 5:15 p.m. (Photo by Joem Bayawa)

Danielle LoPresti of LoPresti and The Masses not only co-created IndieFest, but performs Aug. 17 at 8 p.m. as well. (Photo by Pearl Preis) “IndieFest is going to be our band’s big return to the stage since Danielle’s diagnosis back in Januar y,” Champion said. “She’s only ver y recently been in remission, she’s been out of treatment for about five weeks. On a personal level pulling this off was really hard but we’ve got a lot going on this year that we’re really proud of.”

LoPresti said she plans to do the best she can and hopes her voice holds out. “It’s going to be kind of a spiritual experience for me,” she said. General admission passes for the three-day festival start at $62. The NTC Promenade at Liberty Station is located at 2640 Historic Decatur Rd. For more information and tickets visit


GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013




(l to r) Krista Barnes, Chelsea Diggs-Smith, Susanna Peredo Swap and Danielle Moné Truitt (Photo by Darren Scott)

Music, dance & a deep sense of community Packed with pizazz, ‘In the Heights’ cast is strong through and through When first seen in San Diego in July 2010, Lin Manuel Miranda and Quiara Alegria Hudes’ 2008 Tony Award-winning “In the Heights” was presented by Broadway San Diego at the Civic Theatre. Local audiences may now experience the Pulitzer-nominated musical in the more intimate 511-seat Lyceum Theatre at Horton Plaza. Directed by Artistic Director Sam Woodhouse, the Washington Heights-set show is presented by San Diego Repertory Theatre in partnership with San Diego School of Creative and Performing Arts (SDSCPA). Hyperkinetic and packed with pizazz, warmth and talent, the production is brilliantly executed, with choreography by Javier Velasco, an excellent, unseen 13-piece band, musical direction by Andrew Bearden and – above designer credits on the title page – “starring” Broadway and television actor Jai Rodriguez as Bodega owner Usnavi, a role originated by Miranda on Broadway. Granted, Usnavi is the show’s heart and soul, but seldom if ever is such billing seen in San Diego. Fortunately Rodriguez’s celebrity is not allowed to overshadow or detract from the rest of the company, as fine and talented an ensemble – with not one weak link – as ever are put upon the stage of the Lyceum Theatre. Many in the ensemble and the band are current or former students at SDSCPA. Sean Fanning’s meticulous and wonderful set evokes the neighborhood, which lies at the foot of the GWB, or the George Washington Bridge. Valerie Henderson’s costumes, Trevor Norton’s light lighting and Tom Jones’ well-balanced sound design contribute to the whole. Most of the Washington Heights denizens are first- and second-generation Puerto Rican immigrants. Fanning places Usnavi’s Bodega, the neighborhood convenience store operated with an assist from his cousin Sonny (played

“In the Heights” Through Aug. 25 San Diego REP, Lyceum Stage Tues & Wed 7 p.m. Thurs & Fri 8 p.m. Sat 2 & 8 p.m. Sun 2 & 7 p.m. 619-544-1000 by SDSCPA student Michael S. Garcia), at center stage. To its left is a unisex beauty salon owned by Daniela and Carla (Susanna Peredo Swap and Krista Barnes), who employ Vanessa (Danielle Moné Truitt). The salon is moving to the Bronx. Across the street to the right is Rosario’s taxi dispatch, run by Kevin Rosario (Mauricio Mendoza) and his wife Ca Camilla (Roxanne Carrasco). All his life, a young African-American named Benny (Desmond Newson) has worked for them.

Jai Rodriguez

(Photo by Darren Scott)

Beloved of Benny, Nina Rosario (sweet-voiced Chelsea DiggsSmith) returns to the neighborhood from Stanford University. Unknown to her parents, Nina has lost her scholarship due to inadequate grades and has dropped out of school. When she admits her failure, Kevin sells his dispatch business to support Nina’s return to college. The neighborhood’s true heart and soul is the elderly Abuelita Claudia (dynamite Susan Denaker), who nurtures everyone, particularly Usnavi, who loves Vanessa, and Nina whom she cared for as a little girl. Victor Chan effectively sings the ubiquitous and eventually tedious character Piragua Guy (a piragua is sweet syrup over shaved ice), and longlimbed Spencer Smith is a standout as Graffiti Pete. The action takes place July 3 – 5, 2008, at the time of a prolonged blackout. There is a tense dance club scene, there are fireworks, tempers are lost in the conflict and the heat, and romance waxes and win wanes. The Bodega sells a winning Lotto ticket. There are fiery arguments and there is death. Some prepare to say goodbye. Others decide to remain. Most of all there is music and a deep sense of community and caring. Miranda, who conceived autobiographi this partially autobiographical work when still a student at Wesleyan University, was raised in Washington Heights, the child of Puerto Rican im immigrants. He was looked after by a grandmother similar to Abuela Claudia. Obviously that’s why love of neigh neighborhood, the characters and identity with one’s barrio ring so true. Filled with dance and fierce love, Miranda seems to ask each of us where home is. This is a perfect show for San Diego REP, clearly and beautifully done. Additionally, San Diego REP presents Jai Rodriguez in “Dirty Little Secrets” for one performance only, 7 p.m. Aug. 20 at the Lyceum Stage.t


GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013 think they were her dancers. Then there’s this kind of rock club called The Electric Room and there’s always these little rock gay guys who wanna get in, and they do.


cate, the international LGBT wire service. Reach him via his website

CA: What will surprise people most when they read your memoir, which is supposed to be out at the end of the year?

Scary straights, Kurt Cobain’s lesbian relative and being ‘normal in some ways’ By Chris Azzopardi | Q Syndicate Just give Courtney Love 10 minutes – the time I had to talk to her recently in the midst of her tour, which stops at the Belly Up Aug. 25 – and she’ll tell you a lot of things without you asking. She’ll tell them rapidly, because that’s how her mouth moves, and she’ll tell them at random, because that’s how her mind works. In our quick chat, a blunt-as-ever Love told me about the modernday rock queers she calls “ninja” gays, how she’s actually “really normal” and her desire to educate Kurt Cobain’s family on, I think, equal rights … or something. Chris Azzopardi: I know you know you have a lot of gay fans. Courtney Love: I do, indeed. CA: Have you noticed gays at the shows on this tour? CL: Hell yes! There was one show in Port Chester, N.Y.; I probably won’t be returning there. There weren’t any kids and there weren’t any gays. It was all ladies who were my age … with their hubbies! Some of them didn’t take very good care of themselves. It was really freaky. I need the gays there. If I don’t have the gays, I just go nuts, because they always know every word and they’re the best core audience you can have. And it’s just nice. And you know no one’s gonna attack you and you’re not gonna get a crazy person. After the shows I can’t go and sign autographs without a bodyguard, and I don’t have a bodyguard on this trip, per se, and all it takes is just one freak, because I’m so polarizing. I wish the gay kids and the kids would just go in one clump and then everyone else would go in another clump, because then I could go over to them and sign autographs and stuff and feel completely safe, but I don’t feel completely safe so I just wave and jump in the bus. And some people have traveled seven hours, or nine hours, or 20 hours – I hear all sorts of stories – to get there and I try to give them an autograph, but I get really freaked out that there’s just gonna be some crazy straight guy with some crazy ass agenda who’s gonna try and hurt me. CA: You and the gay community have something in common: We’ve both been bullied. What’s your advice on dealing with haters? CL: Don’t read the comments [laughs]. I think you just let it rub off of you like a duck’s back. I said this recently on my Twitter feed; I was like, “Yo, Amanda Bynes, chill out,” and she went off on me and called me “ugly.” It’s like, “Dude, I’ve been called ugly since I was 13; honestly, that’s it? Ugly? That’s it? Oh, ouch. You hurt my feelings.” I mean, it so doesn’t hurt my feelings. That’s like calling me a slut. It’s like yeah, and? It’s true! But I’m not saying that I feel ugly.

CA: How do you feel about the recent Supreme Court ruling that overturned Prop 8, making it legal for gay couples to marry in California? CL: I’m really excited about it. I think it’s great. The saddest thing is to see, like, two old lesbians who’ve lived together for 1,001 years, and I’ve seen this happen with a relative of Kurt’s ... and Kurt’s family is so weird they won’t admit she’s a lesbian. But whatever. He actually had an uncle die of AIDS and they won’t admit that he died of AIDS. It’s just completely freaky. I think it has a lot to do with a lack of education in Grays Harbor [County in Washington], and with his family I’ve offered everyone down to the last cousin a college education … and nobody wants it. It’s completely weird. Anyyyway. I feel like, um … wait, I just lost track of the question. What was the question? CA: About your feelings on marriage equality in California. CL: Oh, I knew this older lesbian, and her partner died and she had no civil rights to anything. Nothing! And all of a sudden the family moved in and they’d been estranged for 20-some years and it was ridiculous. Then I have a younger friend named Jason who got married in West Hollywood about six years ago and all of a sudden his husband died of a heart attack and he was left with

absolutely nothing. I tried to get him a lawyer so he could fight it; I mean, they were married legally at a time when it was legal. Nobody would take his case. I don’t know why. It was really horrible. He was left with nothing. It’s disgusting. Just disgusting. Embarrassing and disgusting. CA: Last year you and Perez Hilton were going back and forth on Twitter, and you told him you could make him a better gay man. What are your gay guru qualifications? CL: [Laughs] well, be specific. What do you mean? CA: He was talking about not getting laid and you were coaching him, joking that he wasn’t a very good gay man. CL: Well, he’s mean; that doesn’t help. I’ve known that guy for so long, you have no idea. I knew him when his blog was a month old. But I don’t know what I meant. It was a tweet! I don’t know how to make anyone a better gay man. I really don’t. What am I supposed to say … listen to more showtunes? I mean, that’s ridiculous. And modern gay guys don’t actually listen to a lot of showtunes. There are a lot of rock gays, in New York anyway. There are a lot of little gay guys. I went to this thing Madonna was at and there’s all these kind of ninja gay boys – they’re really small – but I

CL: That I’m pretty boring [laughs]. Just that I’m pretty normal in some ways. In some ways I’m completely extraordinary, and in other ways I’m completely weird and eccentric. And in other ways I’m really normal. CA: Last words for your gay fans? CL: I love them. That’s about it. Tickets for Love’s Aug. 25 show at the Belly Up start at $39. Doors for the 21-and-older show open at 8 p.m., and the venue is located at 143 Cedros Ave. in Solana Beach, Calif. For more information and tickets visit or call 858481-8140. —Chris Azzopardi is the editor of Q Syndi-

Courtney Love (Courtesy Q Syndicate)



GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013

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Reader Advisory: The National Trade Association we belong to has purchased the above classifieds. Determining the value of their service or product is advised by this publication. In order to avoid misunderstandings, some advertisers do not offer employment but rather supply the readers with manuals, directories and other materials designed to help their clients establish mail order selling and other businesses at home. Under NO circumstance should you send any money in advance or give the client your checking, license ID, or credit card numbers. Also beware of ads that claim to guarantee loans regardless of credit and note that if a credit repair company does business only over the phone it is illegal to request any money before delivering its service. All funds are based in US dollars. Toll free numbers may or may not reach Canada.


Sales & Rentals

NORTH PARK 4032.5 Iowa.1bd 1ba cottage WITH Hardwd. Floors. $1100 rent, $1100 deposit. Small pet on approval. 3112 30th st. #10. 1bd. 1ba. Completely upgraded with new kitchen cabinets, new granite counter tops, new stainless steel appliances. Must see to appreciate this quiet, clean gated community. Sorry, no pets. Rent $1200 deposit $1200

GOLDEN HILLS 2470.5 Broadway. 1bd. 1 ba. Cottage with hdwd floors Bike to downtown. $995 rent $995 deposit. Sorry no pets.

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GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013


BUSINESS SPOTLIGHTS Hillcrest Advanced Aesthetic Dermatology Dr. Heimer | 3737 Fourth Ave. San Diego, CA 92103 |




Troy Curnett REALTOR ® - Broker


My business depends on referrals. Thanks for thinking of me.

H R Tactics Strategic Planning, Tactical Training Joe Whitaker operates H.R. Tactics, a full-service human resource consulting firm in Mission Hills, providing a broad range of human resource support, products and solutions for small to midsized companies with fees designed to put affordable human resources in reach. He can be contacted at 804-4551 or e-mail at


302 Washington St., Suite 112 San Diego, CA 92103




Garden Design & Maintenance Ca. Contractor License #920677

HEALTH Garden • Shop Classes • Services 3685 Voltaire St. San Diego 619.223.5229 •


(619) 857-8769 DRE # 01343230


No matter how many heated yoga or cross fit classes we take, there is always that one area of stubborn body fat that is immune to diet and exercise. CoolSculpting is a revolutionary new non-surgical contouring treatment that freezes stubborn fat, and then eliminates it from your body. No needles, special diets, supplements or surgery. Most importantly, there is no downtime. It’s safe, FDAcleared, effective, and does exactly what it’s supposed to do. Nine out of 10 people had an undeniable reduction of fat after just one treatment. Dr. William Heimer and the team at his San Diego area practice consistently strive to achieve the best results for their patients. Whether you come to him for skin rejuvenation with microdermabrasion, or wrinkle fillers such as Restylane, or for advanced acne treatment or laser hair removal, you can rest assured Dr. Heimer and his staff will do everything in their power to make sure you leave the office satisfied.

MISSION HILLS AUTOMOTIVE 308 W Washington St., San Diego, CA 92103 619-299-9367 When I took over Mission Hills Automotive in 2008, I was well aware of the thriving LGBT community nearby, having watched its growth while working in the area since 1983. Although the former shop owner built his business on ethics and was AAA approved for 25 years, he never reached out or got involved with the community. I changed that, first by local advertising to let the community know we were here to serve. Then by doing what we do best, wowing each customer with great service, fair prices, and a two-year warranty. After a solid year of growth, we expanded to seven days a week. It was at this time, I was fortunate enough to meet an amazing technician with decades of experience named Jean Claude Gray. While employed at our shop, Jean Claude made the transition to Dusti Gray, and working in a supportive environment helped her make this happen. Being involved also means boots-on-the-ground events, and every year, we have a booth at the Pride festival. We also give back in other ways, such as keeping the Desert Aids Project trucks on the road, and donating to Mama’s Kitchen. As we move forward, we must all try to create a feeling of community in the areas we operate. No longer is it good enough to just open your doors and repair cars. The modern business landscape requires more involvement in the community to build the relationships that will last a lifetime.

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GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013

hotels | rings | tuxedo & dress rentals | reception venues | photographers | florists | cakes | honeymoons

GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013


3766 Fifth Ave., San Diego, CA 92103

Babycakes is the Celebration Destination! We create an average of 250 wedding cakes per year, so we know cakes! We are the preferred cake vendor for many hotels and catering companies throughout San Diego, including Inn at the Park, Hard Rock Hotel, and Loews Coronado Bay Resort, just to name a few. With over 20 years experience, you can trust our Executive Pastry Chef and co-owner Rafael Del Rio. Gay owned and operated, Babycakes is your #1 choice for same-sex wedding cakes or cupcakes. We offer you our award-winning combination: a delicious and moist product coupled with stunning and creative design. Everything from classic to whimsical,

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619-296-4173 | we can make your dream cake for your dream wedding. We offer competitive pricing, free tastings and consultations, and delivery and set-up is also available. In addition to wedding cakes & cupcakes, Babycakes also boasts event space perfect for a bridal shower, bachelor/bachelorette party, rehearsal party or even a wedding reception. We truly bake from the heart and are proud of the reputation that we have built in our community. For cake reservations, please contact Tania Doggett at 619-890-1398 or Celebrate with us because we can now ... HAVE OUR CAKE AND EAT IT, TOO!



GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013

ENTERTAINMENT ROMEO SAN VICENTE sort of accent will we hear from the assimilated American? We’re hoping she goes for that croaking Ke$ha vocal fry.

Portia de Rossi


Now add Portia de Rossi Casual fans of Portia de Rossi (aka everyone not a lesbian or otherwise addicted to “Arrested Development”) might not realize that the actress formerly known as Mandy Rogers also has a former dialect she dumped along with that birth name. Born in Australia, she worked hard to lose her accent for work in America and it took so well there’s not a trace left. But now the actor is headed back to her homeland to shoot a comedy called “Now Add Honey” for husband-and-wife filmmaking team Wayne Hope and Robyn Butler. The couple are vets of Australian sitcoms and the feature is about a family thrown into chaos when their pop star cousin (presumably played by de Rossi) comes home to live with them. Word is that Mrs. de Rossi (OK, Ellen DeGeneres) will join her wife for the Australian shoot. But the big question is what

HBO Documentaries does gay stuff This fall HBO Documentaries delivers a healthy amount of gay-related content to their weekly series, beginning Oct. 7 with first-time filmmaker Marta Cunningham’s Sundance Film Festival selection, “Valentine Road.” Cunningham explores the school shooting of a young teenager who had begun exploring his gender identity, as well as the issues surrounding the social services network and justice system flaws that complicate the lives of LGBT youth. On Dec. 2 comes “The Battle of AMFAR,” from Rob Epstein and Jeffrey Friedman (“The Celluloid Closet,” “Common Threads: Stories From The Quilt”). The film revisits the creation – in the 1980s – of America’s first national AIDS research foundation and the lives of its two founders, Dr. Mathilde Krim and Elizabeth Taylor. And finally, on Dec. 9, “Six By Sondheim,” a highly specific look at acclaimed Broadway composer Stephen Sondheim through the creation of six of his most wellloved songs. Directed by James Lapine, the film’s musical sequences will be co-directed by Todd Haynes (Mildred Pierce) and Autumn de Wilde, with new performances of the featured songs by Audra McDonald, Darren Criss,

DEEP INSIDE HOLLYWOOD Pulp’s Jarvis Cocker, Jeremy Jordan and America Ferrera. You get your Christmas present early with this one.

Alicia Silverstone


HR gives Silverstone the job We’ve missed Alicia Silverstone. Like, a lot. Our worn out VHS tape of “Clueless” bit the dust and then we wore out the DVD, too (yes, it can be done) as the talented comic actor focused on her own post“Clueless” life – vegan cookbooks, unorthodox child-rearing practices, simultaneous internet notoriety for those unorthodox child-rearing practices and a lot of less-thanawesome TV and film projects that we pretty much ignored (with the exception of that one-off episode of the hilarious and weird “Children’s Hospital”). But now Darren Star (“Sex and the City”) has her and we have hope again. A pilot for Lifetime called “HR” will star Silverstone and focus on the changes

her character, a Type-A director of human resources for a large corporation, goes through after suffering a head injury. Drama? Comedy? Probably a little of both (although most likely not slavishly attached to being the female version of the old sitcom “Herman’s Head”), which suits us fine. Head injuries are like that. More news as this develops. Wes Bentley is wide ‘Open’ Is Ryan Murphy in some kind of private who-can-have-the-most-jobs competition with James Franco? Because that’s the only reason we can come up with to explain the “Glee” and “American Horror Story” creator’s sprawling proliferation of TV shows. And the Murphy wave just gets higher with “Open,” his new HBO pilot starring Wes Bentley (“The Hunger Games”). Co-written by Murphy with Lauren Gussis, “Open” follows the life of “handsome, arrogant” Evan Foster (Bentley), a man who thinks he knows all there is to know about human sexuality and who loves to hear himself spin theories about it all. We’re guessing he has a lot to learn and that, since it’s for HBO, there’ll be a lot of nudity while class is in session. Unless it turns into a brostyle “Sex in the City.” Then nobody will ever take off their clothes. Prop 8: The Movie First it was a horrible ballot initiative designed to strip marriage rights away from California’s LGBT community. Then it was a parody YouTube musical with an all-star

cast. Then it was a play from Dustin Lance Black based on court transcripts. Then it was a dead piece of historic legal discrimination thanks to the Supreme Court of the United States and now, thanks to HBO Documentary Films and directors Ben Cotner and Ryan White, the Proposition 8 media train makes another stop at the feature-length doc station. For the past five years, Cotner and White have had access to the work of both the legal team and the plaintiffs, whose stories gave the case such a powerful punch when it came to demonstrating Prop. 8’s harm to gay relationships with no concurrent benefit for society. The as-yet-untitled film is currently in production and is scheduled to air on HBO at an unspecified date in 2014. If justice prevails, there’ll be more states adopting marriage equality laws in the interim. Victory lap! Billie Jean King: ‘American Master’ For the first time ever, PBS’s “American Masters” is going to profile a sports figure and that inaugural honor goes to tennis legend Billie Jean King. The 90-minute documentary on the 69-year-old King will focus on her career, one that challenged sexism in American sports and changed the way women’s athletic achievements are perceived all over the world. In addition to new interviews with King, the film will feature Serena and Venus Williams, Maria Sharapova, members of the Virginia Slims Circuit “Original 9” like Rosie Casals, Gloria Steinem, Chris Evert, Margaret Court, Bobby Riggs’ son Larry, King’s friend Elton John and former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton. Fittingly, “American Masters: Billie Jean King” will premiere Sept. 10 on PBS affiliates to commemorate the 40th anniversary of the infamous “Battle of The Sexes” match between King and Bobby Riggs. This calls for a watching party: white Lacoste shirts and softbutch haircuts mandatory. Kate McKinnon dominates in ‘Intramural’ ever ything Speaking of Ellen (sort of), Kate McKinnon – SNL’s resident DeGeneres mimic and rising lesbian star in her own right – will become the next person to make the leap from the sketch comedy series onto the big screen with “Intramural.” Sitting squarely in the plot camp occupied by goofy, low-stakes comedies like “Dodgeball,” the movie is about a fifth-year college student dragging his heels toward graduation and life responsibility who decides to organize one last epic intramural football season before… oh gosh, do you really care? It’s another man-child comedy, the kind we all secretly love but pretend to be snobby about. Andrew Disney will direct a script written by Bradley Jackson and the cast includes – alongside McKinnon – Jake Lacy (“The Office”), Nikki Reed (“The Twilight Saga” franchise) and another “SNL” star, Jay Pharoah. The film will shoot in Austin, Texas, and true to its subject matter has a very realistic goal in mind, thanks to director Disney, who says, “We’re setting out to make an epic sports movie for the guys who don’t deserve one.” —Romeo San Vicente loves his fair share of epic sports movies. He can be reached at

GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013

Friday, Aug. 9

DIGITAL GYM: New Films Cinema’s release “Ashley” hits on the important topic of anti-bullying, and makes its U.S. domestic debut today at the Digital Gym in North Park. Written by Domenic Migliore, “Ashley” features a lesbian teenager who resorts to cutting to escape those around her who don’t accept her. The film screens at 6 p.m., and the Digital Gym is located at 2921 El Cajon Blvd. For more information and tickets visit

Saturday, Aug. 10

FILL THE DRAWERS: Head to Revivals Hillcrest for a special “Fill the Drawers” donation and shopping day, with 20 percent off purchases and, if you bring in a donation of new or used clothing, furniture, electronics or housewares, you get the chance to win two tickets to Thursday’s Wine Tasting. What’s more, bring in nonperishable food items all day long to help fill the dresser drawers for Mama’s Pantry. For more information visit HRC SAN DIEGO: The San Diego chapter of the Human Rights Campaign is hosting a special gala dinner with guest speakers HRC Field Director Marty Rouse and actor and ally Justin Bartha. Frenchie Davis will be performing, and LGBT Weekly publisher Stampp Corbin and Sempra Energy will be honored. The dinner is held at the US Grant Hotel, 326 Broadway at 5 p.m. For more information visit “NOCTURNE” AT PROTEA: North Park’s Protea Gallery opens “Nocturne: regional art exhibit” with a reception from 6 – 9 p.m. (coinciding with Ray at Night). The exhibit, which will remain up through Sept. 7, features dozens of area artists answering the question “What does nocturne mean to you?” There will also be a discussion about how San Diego art is unique, at 7 p.m. Protea Gallery is located at 3780 30th St. For more information, visit

Sunday, Aug. 11

CITYFEST: Duh… it’s the “other Pride” in Hillcrest, the HBA’s Fabulous Hillcrest CityFest, from noon to 11 p.m. Come to the Hillcrest sign for music, drink, dancing and fun (we’ll be there, stop by our booth). Looking for more information? Check out our insert on page 13. AFTER HOURS: OK so you partied all day at CityFest and want to continue the fun… Rich’s San Diego is host to the official after hours party, with DJ Hektik and DJ Kiki. Doors at 10

p.m., with no cover for those with a CityFest wristband. Rich’s is located at 1051 University Ave.

Tuesday, Aug. 13

LUNCH WITH THE GSDBA: Join the Greater San Diego Business Association’s Professional lunch Series, with special guest Sheriff Bill Gore. Gore will discuss current San Diego County events. The lunch is hosted at Wang’s North Park, 3029 University Ave. Tickets are $25 pre-registration, $35 at the door. For more information visit or call 619-296-4543. TEXAS HOLD ‘EM: Flicks hosts tonight’s Texas Hold ‘Em poker tournament, starting at 6:30 p.m. Buy-in is $20 for 2,500 chips, with add-ons and rebuys available too (I’m sure you poker people know what I’m talking about here). The tournament benefits the AFCSL softball team going to the World Series, and there will be cash and prizes throughout the night. For a seat, contact our columnist Jeff Praught at jpraught@ Flicks is located at 1017 University Ave.

Thursday, Aug. 15

STREET CHALLENGE: Kick off AIDS Walk & Run with The Center’s Street Food and Street Challenge party, with food trucks, craft beer and a taste of this year’s obstacle courses. Come to The Center at 3909 Centre St. from 5 – 8 p.m. (the event is free) and get set for a great, new AIDS Walk year. For more information visit SUMMER MIXER: The Greater San Diego Business Association is hosting a Summer GSDBA Mixer at Scripps Mercy Hospital, located at 4077 Fifth Ave. Celebrate summer at this 21 and older event from 6 – 8 p.m. Tickets are $10 for members and $25 for guests. For more information visit or call 619-296-4543. MAMA’S WINE TASTING: Now in its 18th year – 18 years! – the Mama’s Kitchen annual Wine Tasting fundraiser, presented by Revivals, will be held at Bourbon Street Bar & Grill tonight from 6 – 9 p.m. Proceeds go directly to Mama’s Kitchen, and attendees will have eclectic wine tastings and hors d’oeuvres galore. Tickets are $60 in advance, $70 at the door. Bourbon Street is located at 4612 Park Blvd. For more information, visit MISS KITTY’S WILD WEST: Diversionary Cabaret’s latest show “Miss Kitty’s Wild West Revue” plays for four nights only – tonight through Aug. 18

– and is a “tawdry, two-steppin’” show featuring original material by Tony Houck and Jacque Wilke. Conceived and directed by Michael Mizerany, “Miss Kitty” (title character played by Houck, of course) welcomes you to a wild West saloon with scantily clad dancing boys, raunchy humor and a good time. And there are cowhands, too (played by Erik Fager, Doug Long and Scottie Tidwell). Adults only for this one, with six different times: Thursday and Friday at 8 p.m., Saturday at 8 and 10:30 p.m., and Sunday at 2 and 7 p.m. Diversionary is located at 4545 Park Blvd, and tickets can be purchased at diversionary. org or by calling 619-220-0097.

Friday, Aug. 16

OBELISK GRAND OPENING: We welcome the return of Obelisk to Hillcrest, which will be celebrating with a grand opening champagne party tonight and storewide discounts all weekend. If you haven’t stopped by yet, you must come. The Hillcrest sign, along with the rest of the shop, looks amazing. Tonight’s party is at 7 p.m. at 1037 University Ave. For more information visit THAT STOLI GUY: What do you mean Stoli doesn’t support the gays? Come out to the GayCitiessponsored Most Original Stoli Guy contest, starting at 8 p.m. Jai “Queer Eye” Rodriquez and Andrew Christian host, and word is Eddie Rey and Paris Max will make appearances too. The event is free with RSVP ( and is being held at Rich’s San Diego, 1051 University Ave. For more information visit

Saturday, Aug. 17

FREE TO BREATHE: Today is the fourth annual Free to Breathe San Diego Lung Cancer 5k Run/Walk, highlighting the fight against lung cancer, which claims more lives each year than breast, colon and prostate cancer combined. Proceeds benefit the National Lung Cancer Partnership. Registration starts at 7:15 a.m., with an 8:30 a.m. start time for runners. Closing ceremonies are at 10 a.m., and the course is at Liberty Station NTC Park, located on Cushing Street. For more information visit freetobreathe. org/sandiego/. FERRAGOSTO: It’s the “party of the summer” in Little Italy’s Amici Park, when Ferragosto – San Diego’s take on the Italian holiday Feriae Augsti – returns for the third year. The park will be transformed into the Rome Coliseum and a Venetian

masquerade party, with a theme straight out of the roaring 1920s. Food from local restaurants will be available, and all proceeds go to raise money for Washington Elementary School, Our Lady of the Rosary Church and the Little Italy Association. Tickets for the 6 p.m. – midnight event are $110, or $1,100 for tables. For more information visit FIRST PERIOD: FilmOut San Diego brings yet another first-rate, must see LGBT film with “First Period,” screening tonight at 7:30 p.m. Candi Samples and Tara Hole will host, and the filmmaker, Charlie Vaughn, will attend with some of the cast. FilmOut Programmer Michael McQuiggan said “First Period” is the perfect crowd-pleaser comedy. Tickets are $10, and the film screens at the Birch North Park Theatre, 2891 University Ave. For more information visit

Sunday, Aug. 18

DIVING FOR BEING ALIVE: Last year’s fundraising event for Being Alive was such a success, they had to come back another year for more fun. From 1 – 4 p.m. at 1041 Cypress St., hosts Paris, Candi Samples, Susan Jester and Big Mike will join DJ Rob Klaproth and the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence pool side (bring a swimsuit and towel, please). The $25 suggested donation includes food and a hosted bar. For more information contact Big Mike at 619-807-7324. TOM GOSS: For those who have seen the bear-loving YouTube hit “Bears” by Tom Goss, you’re in for a treat. Goss will be at the Bamboo Lounge tonight for a live performance (for those who haven’t seen it yet, get to it). His performance starts at 6:30 p.m., and the “guitar-toting, power-pop prodigy” has had music featured on ABC, HBO and MTV’s LOGO. Bamboo Lounge is located at 1475 University Ave., and tickets are $10. For more information visit

Monday, Aug. 19

MANIC MONDAY: We can’t really say enough good things


about Manic Mondays at The Brass Rail, especially now that they’ve included 90s music, too. Relive your youth (or hear what you missed out on, you young gays, you). The Rail is located at 3796 Fifth Ave. For more information visit

Wednesday, Aug. 21

ANDREW BELLE: Chicagobased singer-songwriter Andrew Belle comes to The Casbah for a special 21 and older show tonight. Presented with the John Lennon Songwriting award in 2009, Belle is currently a part of the national touring group Ten Out Of Tenn. Tickets are $10 advance, and doors open at 8:30 p.m. The Casbah is located at 2501 Kettner Blvd. For more information visit

Thursday, Aug. 22

AFFORDABLE CARE ACT: The San Diego Regional Chamber of Commerce will be hosting an event titled “What does the Affordable Care Act Do and How Will it Impact Your Business?” Own a small business? Employed by one? You should go, from 12:30 – 2:30 p.m. The chamber is located at 402 W. Broadway, #1000 in Downtown. For more information visit or call 619-727-4885. OCEANSIDE FILM FEST: This year’s Oceanside International Film Festival features work by young filmmaker Ben Kadie, a recent high school graduate from Washington state whose “The Painted Girl” tells the story of a closeted 15-year-old girl named Megan. The movie was filmed in Seattle and has Megan hiding in an abandoned underground tunnel, using spray paint and graffiti to create art for her mother, who does not understand exactly who the girl is. It screens as part of the festival’s Student Films screening on Aug. 25, and tonight’s kick-off reception and film selection starts at 5 p.m. There are over 50 films screening today through Aug. 25 at numerous locations in Oceanside, Calif. For the compete lineup, locations and tickets, visit or facebook. com/likeOIFF/.t



GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013



San Diego Pool League fall season begins Have you ever wandered into Hillcrest establishments including Flicks, Pecs, The Loft or #1 Fifth Avenue and seen some of the outstanding pool players? Many of the players are regulars who we only see out and about when playing pool. You may be surprised to learn that several of them play in the San Diego Pool League (SDPL), our LGBT league that was founded in 1978. What you may not realize, however, is that this league is also home to many average players as well. In fact, SDPL hosts an A, B and C division, with A being the highest level of competition. Each division currently has seven teams, and each team can have between two and seven players. Matches are played on Monday nights, rotating between the sponsor venues. In addition to the aforementioned locations, Redwing, SRO Lounge and The Eagle host SDPL matches. Joining them are Alibi, Kelly’s Pub, Mission Valley Resort, The Hungry Stick, and True North, all long-time straight allies of the league. Teams meet up at host bars to play matches that consist of 16 games. It takes a minimum of nine individual game wins for a team to claim a victory. Matches that end up 8-8 result in a tie during the regular season. Teams from the B and C divisions play each other in the playoffs, with the winners advancing to play the A teams in the finals. Individual and team trophies are presented at the conclusion of each season, with winners earning invitations to the West Coast Challenge (WCC), which occurs twice a season. The WCC is held every year in January and again in July, and rotates between San Diego, Long Beach, Calif., Los Angeles and San Francisco. It is no coincidence then that SDPL holds a fall season that runs from August until December, and a spring season that runs from January until June. At the conclusion of each

season, the league hosts a banquet to present its team and individual awards. The diversity of the league’s membership is broad, as both men and women ranging in age from 21 to 81 participate. Marge Heinen, mother of the former owner of what was then called Shooters in North Park, is the league’s senior-most member. Brad Hasper has been a member of SDPL since its inception in 1978, playing as a member of the A division. Having competed at a high level in the San Diego Tennis Federation, Hasper enjoys the alternative competitive environment SDPL offers. “The friendly competition is what I really love about this league,” Hasper said. “Everyone gets along. I joined the league because I like to go to the bars and have a good time, but I can do so on slow nights like Mondays, where I can compete but do so while relaxing and just playing pool. It’s nice to be just one of several people on a team, as opposed to being an individual competitor like I am in tennis.” Hasper, who played for Flicks A team for years before moving over to the Mission Valley Resort team this year, said his years in SDPL have helped him make friends up and down the West Coast, having met so many at the various WCC tournaments. He even has taken time to participate in Palm Springs’ version of the gay pool league circuit. One of the league’s youngest members, David Durham, is participating in just his second season. He plays on the Flicks B team with five teammates who were friends before deciding to form a team. “It’s really a nice challenge for me, and still gives me a way to socialize while playing pool with players in the gay community,” he said. Some teams are still looking for players, having just completed week one of the season. Players can be added to teams before

Kyle Matthews plays for Hungry Stick C in the San Diego Pool League. (Photo by Tyler Doty)

the fourth-to-last week of the fall season. Player fees are just $7 per player, per week. If you are interested in learning more about the league or getting matched up with a team, visit the league’s website at Around town Teams from America’s Finest City Softball League (AFCSL) are practicing for the upcoming Gay Softball World Series in Washington at the end of the month. Some of the teams are holding fundraisers to help offset the tremendous cost of attending this weeklong event from Aug. 26 through Sept. 1. Be sure to help them out if you are out socializing, they would appreciate your support. The teams going are Bourbon Street KRUSH, The Loft (D), Flicks Lawmen, Mariposa SOL and my own team, The Loft (B). The fall season of AFCSL will begin on Sunday, Sep. 8. Teams and players interested

in getting involved in this short five-week season should visit immediately. Games are being scheduled for both the women’s division and the predominantly male open division. Congratulations will be going out to players of San Diego American Flag Football League (SDAFFL), who have been selected to participate in this year’s Gay Bowl in Phoenix. San Diego claimed its first Gay Bowl title last year in Denver. This year for the first time, the league has put together a fantastic women’s team as well. —Jeff Praught is actively involved in the LGBT sports community, where he plays in the local softball (AFCSL), football (SDAFFL) and basketball (SD Hoops) leagues. He has served on AFCSL’s board of officers in various capacities and is currently the commissioner of SD Hoops.t


GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013

Avoiding a meltdown

B L A K E & G W E N B E C KO M

FITNESS With summer temperatures on the rise, it can be hard to focus on your workouts and keep your eye on the prize. As sweat drips down your face and clothes stick in various places, it’s a lot easier to throw in the towel and accept defeat instead of sticking to your routine and beating the heat. To keep from melting away this summer, overcome the intense hot sun with a consistent fitness routine that is active, cool and fun.

Say hello to hydration Drinking enough water throughout the year is an important component for everyone’s lifestyle. But when temperatures climb in the hot summer months and you are active outdoors, consistently drinking enough water is even more critical to maintaining your health and safety. Hydration before a workout in the heat is really important. And the more you perspire during your workout the more water you need to drink. Drink eight to 12 ounces of water before you work out and then consistently throughout the workout. Drink a glass of water as soon as you wake up in the morning. You’ve just had six to eight hours of having no water in your system, so it’s important to replenish your water supply first thing in the morning. While drinking an adequate amount of water is an important factor when exercising outside in the summer, it’s also important to keep tabs on other elements that can contribute to heat exhaustion and heat stroke. Some of these additional contributing factors include body size, exercise intensity,

fitness level, age, humidity and air temperature. You can get twice the effect working out in the heat than when you are inside. You can work out for a shorter amount of time and reap the same rewards as long as you monitor hydration and watch for the warning signs of heat exhaustion. Working out in the heat does provide some elements of danger, so take extreme care if you feel dizziness, headache or begin to feel faint, as these are all common signs of heat exhaustion.

workout is simply running or walking back and forth in the shallow end as many times as you can in a set amount of time, to get a highintensity but low-impact workout. Alternating between treading water and resting in the deep end of the pool for a set number of one-minute intervals also can be an effective summertime workout. The power of water as a built-in resistance tool can allow you to burn a maximum amount of calories in a relatively short amount of time.

"Whether you work out inside or outdoors, the most important thing is to keep your exercises fun and challenging, while maintaining consistency when the heat is on, or off."

Hit the pool Summertime equals swimming time for most kids and families, but taking your workouts to the pool can also be a great way to stay cool while being active this summer. Swimming laps is a great total body cardio and resistance training workout, but you don’t have to be a strong swimmer to benefit from exercising in the water. A good non-swimming pool

Head indoors If grueling hot temperatures are weighing you down and keeping you from getting in your outdoor workouts, take your exercise


routine inside for a more stable and consistent environment. Working out indoors can help protect you from the outdoor elements of the summer season and allow you to focus more on getting in a good workout, and less on how hot you are. It also can provide a good opportunity to try out new equipment, small group classes or exercises that you commonly may not do in an outdoor environment. In your journey for health, discipline is one of the best things you can do for yourself. When it comes to beating the heat, don’t let hot temperatures be an excuse and don’t let them stop you from getting your workout in. Once the excuse cycle begins, workouts fall by the wayside, only for us to look up down the line with regret. Whether you work out inside or outdoors, the most important thing is to keep your exercises fun and challenging, while maintaining consistency when the heat is on, or off. —Gwen and Blake Beckcom own Fitness Together Mission Hills, offering personal training with qualified professionals by regular appointment in private suites. Exercise and nutritional programs are custom designed to fit your needs and abilities. Call 619-794-0014 for more information or to schedule a free fitness diagnostic and private training session.t


GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 9–22, 2013

Gay San Diego  

August 9, 2013 edition

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