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GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017






Sip & Shop the Neighborhood 11am to 5pm Free Trolley

Small Business Saturday Scavenger Hunt 11am to 5pm

Sand Sculpture Celebration on Ocean Beach 9am to 4pm

Goldfinch + West Washington + West Lewis + Reynard Way + India Street

30th and University

Newport Ave and Abbott Street (at the waterfront)

Mission Hills is where the gifts are. Our merchants are celebrating Small Business Saturday and are ready to welcome you. On Saturday morning, November 25th, stop by the 4010 Goldfinch parking lot to pick up your FREE fun-filled shopping bag and a guide to the day’s Sips. Shop Local. Shop Small. Sip & Shop the Neighborhood. For more information please visit:

A bustling day of unique shopping finds including Instagrammable street art, local made goods, live music, and eats & drinks. Celebrate local shops in North Park by participating in our annual Small Business Scavenger Hunt! Starting 11/18 and culminating on 11/25. All participating contestants will have the chance to win a cash prize simply by shopping small! FREE PARKING: North Park Garage located on 29th & North Park Way for more details #ExploreNorthPark For more information please visit:

Join Ocean Beach MainStreet Association at the foot of Newport Avenue from 9am to 4pm on Saturday, November 25, 2017, to kick off the Passport to OB program and celebrate Small Business Saturday! Enjoy a giant sand sculpture on the beach celebrating Ocean Beach and shopping small, and score giveaways like shopping bags and other goodies at the grassy area at Abbott and Newport. For more information please visit:


GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017


Boosting the muscles of recovery Annual Recovery Ride raises money for HIV/recovery support services, and promotes conversation Morgan M. Hurley | Editor On Saturday, Nov. 18, during Stepping Stone’s annual commemorative tile ceremony, Jere Halligan and Rob Rubright were honored with a tile from the staff and board of Stepping Stone for the work they’ve done with the Recovery Ride, a fundraising bike ride they founded in 2016. Commemorative tiles become permanent fixtures on the exterior walls of the Stepping Stone recovery community’s courtyard and are an honored tradition at the facility. The Recovery Ride raises critical funds for Stepping Stone and 11 local HIV services organizations through the San Diego HIV Funding Collaborative. It was also the day Halligan and Rubright announced that registration for the 2018 Recovery Ride had opened. “The term ‘recovery ride’ comes from the cycling community,� Halligan said. “It’s a short ride the day after a long ride. It’s an essential part of training for cyclists — giving a boost to the muscles as well as to the mind — and the double meaning with our causes was perfect!� The third annual Recovery Ride will take place Jan. 21, 2018, and its start and finish are at Swiss Park in Chula Vista. There are three bike-riding lengths in and around South Bay available: a Fun Ride (12 miles), a Strand Ride (25 miles) and an Olympian Ride (40 miles). The ride takes place after the first of the year, Halligan said, so that participants can incorporate it into their New Year’s resolutions. While the inaugural ride saw approximately 120 riders and 50 volunteers, at least 300 riders are expected for 2018 and more than 100 volunteers will assist with the event. Those volunteers will be spread out along the three

routes, encouraging and supporting the cyclists as they pass by. Halligan said postride surveys have repeatedly given them high marks on the organization and fun factor. “Each rest stop is hosted by a community organization and has its own theme — think the Rock ‘n’ Roll Marathon, but instead of bands, we have cheering squads and a Rocky Horror theme,� he said. “We have rest stops at Tidelands Park in Coronado, at Babycakes in Imperial Beach, and at Mountain Hawk Park near the Olympic Training Center.� The two friends decided to create the Recovery Ride after participating in AIDS/LifeCycle, a seven-day, 545-mile bike ride from San Francisco to Los Angeles that raises money for AIDS/HIV services. “It’s a terrific event that does a ton of good and has an unbelievable culture, but all the funds raised from San Diego participants go to HIV services in Los Angeles,� Halligan said. “We felt as though there was room to connect the cycling community in San Diego with nonprofits doing important work in San Diego in the areas of HIV prevention, treatment and awareness, and recovery from drugs and alcohol.� Halligan said that recovery from drugs and alcohol are an important factor in getting one’s HIV under control, because without it, managing the regimen of HIV medications is almost impossible. While the Recovery Ride is an alcohol- and drug-free event, Halligan said everyone is encouraged to ride, whether you have a connection to the recovery community or not. “Some riders — training for AIDS LifeCycle or the Tour de Palm Springs — will use this event as part of their training schedule,� he said. “Other

riders are fans of Stepping Stone and the HIV Funding Collaborative and use this as an opportunity to support their missions. Some riders just love the vibe and the experience of this particular ride, and come back year after year to be a part of it.â€? Though riders aren’t required to raise money to participate, Harrigan is quick to remind our readers that the mission of the Recovery Ride is to support the organizations they ride for in a financial manner. He and Rubright created an HIV- and recovery-focused biking event specifically to keep the proceeds local, and since those organizations now depend upon that funding, they do hope that participants will be inspired to support that mission, too. “In this era of really great options for HIV-positive and HIV-negative women and men, it’s easy to not talk about HIV much anymore and the topics of addiction and alcoholism are rife with internalized shame,â€? he said. “Raising money while talking about HIV and addiction raises these issues over and over again with friends, family, co-workers ... on social media, emails, person-to-person conversations, text messages. It keeps these issues from remaining hidden.â€? The 2018 Recovery Ride takes place Jan. 21, 2018 with its start and finish at Swiss Park, located at 2001 Main St. in Chula Vista. Packet pickup will be Jan. 20 at Stepping Stone, 3767 Central Ave. in City Heights. Rider registration at Swiss Park on race day will begin at 7 a.m. Riders of the 40-mile route will leave at 8:30 a.m., with other groups of riders following suit. For more information, visit or email —Morgan M. Hurley can be reached at morgan@sdcnn. com.â–ź

(l to r) Rob Rubright and Jere Halligan flank the Recovery Ride’s commemorative tile at Stepping Stone. (Photos|by|Morgan M. Hurley)

The commemorative tile presented to Halligan and Rubright on Nov. 18






GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017

The history of The Center Part III: 2001 forward — a place we all call ‘home’ Profiles in Advocacy Ian Morton [Editor’s note: This is the third and final column in the series.] The history of the LGBTQ movement has been filled with galvanizing events, and the time leading up to Dr. Delores

Jacobs assuming the position of chief executive officer at the San Diego LGBT Community Center (The Center), a role she has had for 17 years, was no different. Due in great part to the work The Center and partner organizations put in to create positive LGBTQ relationships with the broader community, we were seeing advances in equality. This trajectory was

(l to r) Fernando Lopez, operations director of San Diego Pride; and Dr. Delores Jacobs, CEO of the San Diego LGBT Community Center; on stage during the 2016 Spirit of Stonewall Rally (Facebook)

dealt a statewide blow with the passing of California Proposition 22 in 2000, declaring that “only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California.” It was on the heels of the passage of this proposition, and the defining court case of Lawrence vs. Texas — a case that held national significance when laws criminalizing consensual same-sex intimacy (sodomy laws) were upheld — that The Center entered the 2000s. In addition to managing a workspace still under construction, Jacobs and the staff of The Center sought to continue the many threads of advocacy that had been the dreams of its founding members. While sitting down with Jacobs to discuss her years at The Center, she emphasized how today’s vast programming is really a reflection of the dreams from those early days. “The vision for what exists today, existed then,” she said. “They were concerned about the youth and seniors and the LGBTQ members of the military. They were concerned about families — even if the resources to have families didn’t exist as we know it today. They were worried about the fact that the word ‘gay’ somehow implied ‘white,’ even if they knew that not to be true. They were concerned about whether

they would have a social and civic voice. Those aspirations are today’s aspirations.” Like those early days, the expansion of The Center’s services begins with the voice of the community — sometimes just a concerned citizen sitting down with Jacobs or a Center staff member. It is from these initial conversations that programs like Latino services, the Sunburst House youth housing project and other key programs began. “Every time there was a clear need, a set of staff, community members and sometimes experts would come together and ask, ‘What can we do?’” Jacobs explained. “It was this sort of community teamwork that created the programs that our community uses today.” Progress also included engaging the community and our allies, and changing hearts and minds, as goals were set in having a stronger civic voice. This led to the establishment of the Public Affairs and Policy advocacy work of The Center, while mobilizing the community. “We started with the simple act of registering our community and our friends to vote,” Jacobs clarified. “We needed to get on the playing field and build a culture where the LGBTQ community was fully engaged in the political process. The fight has always been for equality, equity and dignity and the right to live as our full, authentic selves. That fight looked different in 2001 than it did last year, or does today. But it is the same fight.” The Center has prioritized some of the most vulnerable of our community — youth and seniors — through its Hillcrest Youth Center (a drop-in center for teens), independent living resources for at-risk youth at Sunburst House, and work that has led to the establishment of LGBTQ-affirming housing. In line with these populations, was the establishment of the Young Professionals Council (YPC), a program to “develop and empower young LGBT professionals and their allies.” “I was — and perhaps some believe I still am — a teacher,” Jacobs declared. “I believe the first and foremost the responsibilities of ‘leaders’ are to teach and mentor upcoming leaders. For me, to sit with a group of 20 younger, intersectional, emerging leaders [during the YPC Academy], and be able to talk with them about how they see the world and ways of achieving social justice, is a time of year that I love. There is something about those moments …” As Dr. Jacobs completes her final year as executive director, the memories and moments are too myriad to catalog in this column. At the end of the day, The Center has been a home in which the San Diego LGBT community has shared in celebrations, losses and remembering those who have come before us. “The moment we were able to open the doors of The Center, as we know it today, it was clear that having a ‘home’ mattered, on a ‘heart’ level,” Jacobs said. “There is a sense of full citizenship when our community had a home built for us — and homes are to be shared. It has been our hope and our work to provide all we can for our most vulnerable — our youth, our seniors, our families, our trans community and all those who are LGBT and of color. Some days we succeed and some days we fall woefully short — but it is always the thing we are striving for.” That really says it best. The doors of The Center are open to you, with a commitment to be responsive to the community’s needs. Step inside and see how you can be part of a better San Diego! To all of those who gave their time to be interviewed, thank you so much — from the early 1970s to today — what a journey! —Ian D. Morton is the director of operations at San Diego Human Dignity Foundation and produces the Y.E.S. San Diego LGBTQ youth conference. To nominate an individual or nonprofit for this column, please email the information to▼

Dr. Delores Jacobs has been at the helm of the San Diego LGBT Community Center for 17 years. She will leave her post in 2018. (Courtesy The Center)


“raise your glass” to the end of new HIV infections in the region. The Bar AIDS event offers bars, coffee shops, nightclubs The day’s festivities will be and juice/smoothie bars the anchored by a welcome station opportunity to support HIV and include words from an elect- services throughout San ed official, live entertainment, a Diego County by donating Santa Claus onsite and special 25 percent or more of the giveaways to those who do indeed day's beverage sales to the shop small. San Diego HIV Funding The welcome station —located in Collaborative, an organizathe Rite Aid parking lot at the south- tion that will then distribute west corner of Fifth and Robinson the money to HIV support avenues — will be open from 9 a.m. services programs. to 4 p.m. on Saturday, Nov. 25. Last year’s Bar AIDS District 3 City Councilmember participants were Rich’s Chris Ward will kick off the fesSan Diego; Numb3rs (now tivities with a rally to encourage closed); Babycakes; The and support the shoppers. Local Merrow; Rakitori; Pecs; The cheer group Cheer San Diego Hole in the Wall; and Pardon will entertain attendees. My French. Keep an eye on Shoppers who show the HBA the website to see who will staff at the welcome station a be participating this year. receipt for $15 or more from local Businesses and ambassamerchants will get a gift bag con- dors (volunteers) still needtaining more than $100 in gift ed. Businesses who wish to certificates and other giveaways participate should visit goo. from participating Hillcrest busi- gl/2PrPw1. To sign up to be nesses, while supplies last. an ambassador, visit Gift bags will include gift EuplHe. For more informacards for free meals at local tion about the event itself, restaurants, free drinks at local visit coffee shops and bars, free hair FILMOUT TO SCREEN and beauty products, free beau‘XANADU’ ty services including eyebrow FilmOut San Diego threading and facials, and more. is bringing the beloved If you can’t make it to Small Business Saturday, the HBA will “Xanadu” to San Diego as part of its monthly screening also be promoting its local small series on Dec. 13. The film businesses through the annual has sold out, but FilmOut Taste n’ Tinis event on Dec. 14, will have a standby line in from 4–9 p.m. case any tickets are returned For more details about either of these events, visit fabuloushill- or unused. The 1980 musical sy film, written by Richard APPLICATIONS FOR HIVChristian Danus and diRELATED GRANTS SOUGHT rected by Robert Greenwald, The San Diego HIV Funding starred Olivia Newton John, Collaborative, an extension of Gene Kelly, Michael Beck the San Diego Human Dignity and Matt Lattanazi, NewtonFoundation (SDHDF), is seeking John’s first husband, whom local community-based organizations she met while making the that provide HIV/AIDS prevention, film. education and/or care, or treatment The film’s soundtrack programs and services, to respond to features music from Electric their request for proposal and throw Light Orchestra, The their names into the grant process. Tubes, Cliff Richard and Applicants must be 501(c)(3) Newton-John. nonprofits located in San Diego While considered a “flop” County, and must provide HIV/ at the box office when it was AIDS services. first released, the roller-disThree major funding areas co-themed fantasy film has are under consideration, and enjoyed a cult following over organizations may only apply for the years and a stage musical one of three categories: strengthbased on the 97-minute film ening systems for HIV/AIDS was released on Broadway in coordinated service sites; HIV/ 2007. AIDS prevention and education To view a trailer from the services; or HIV/AIDS care and film, visit treatment services. Presented by FilmOut Only one proposal per funding San Diego, the film screening cycle, per applicant and SDHDF is co-presented by Mance funds cannot be used to supplant Creative, Josh Bottfeld, Amy any other funding source and Driscoll, Ron Oster and Ivan should be considered funding of Solis. last resort. FilmOut holds its film Funding sources for this screenings throughout the year’s grant process come from year to help support its annuThink Red (aka the Red Dress al FilmOut San Diego Film Party); the Recovery Ride San Festival, which takes place Diego; proceeds from the sale each year in June. The 2018 of Hillcrest Brewing Company’s festival, scheduled to be held Red Ribbon Ale; Bar AIDS; and June 7–10, 2018, will celethe Sunshine Brooks Fund. brate the organization’s 20th Applications must be submitanniversary, and submissions ted electronically by Dec. 1 to are now open. Ian Morton, SDHDF operations “Xanadu” will be screened director, at For at 7 p.m. Wednesday, Dec. more specific details regarding 13, at Landmark Hillcrest this RFP, visit Cinemas, located at 3965 Fifth Ave., in Hillcrest. RAISE YOUR GLASS Tickets cost $10. For more FOR BAR AIDS information, visit filmOn Thursday, Dec. 7, nizers of the second annual see Briefs, pg 24 Bar AIDS San Diego ask you to



GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017


The pros and cons of younger/older relationships Life Beyond Therapy Michael Kimmel In my psychotherapy practice, I often assist lesbian couples where one of the women is significantly older than her partner. Last month, one of these women asked me, “Why don’t you write a column about age differences in lesbian relationships and how to handle them?” Yesterday, a gay male couple I counsel, where one of the men is quite a bit younger than his partner, made a similar request, “It would be great if you would write a column about older men with younger men and give us some advice.” Okay, good people, I’m listening. Here is that column. Over the years, I have seen dozens of LGBT couples where one person in the couple is significantly older than the other. While all couples have to navigate questions of shared interests and preferences, younger/older partners sometimes experience this more than others. Age is often a factor determining preferred leisure activities, how to spend money and other important decisions. For instance, if you’ve long passed your “club/bar/ nightlife” days and your lover hasn’t, this could be challenging for both of you. If you are just entering the most productive time of your career and your partner is ready to retire, how do you both manage those differences? In my experience, younger/ older couples also experience more social disapproval of their relationships than similarly-aged couples do. If your friends think your relationship is foolish, this will probably negatively impact your social life and how you experience your lover. Based on my experience counseling older/younger couples, here are some of the pros and cons I’ve observed for each person in the relationship: For the younger person: It’s healthy if you: ● Have a great mentor in your lover and feel secure with them. ● Encourage them to stay active and healthy. ● Keep your peer group friendships. ● Give what you can financially to the relationship. ● Accept and even celebrate your differences. On the other hand, it’s unhealthy if you: ● Lean on your lover too much. ● Depend on them financially. ● Use sex to get what you want. ● Avoid growing up/maturing/becoming responsible. ● Want to please your lover too much (codependence).

For the older person: It’s healthy if you: ● Have so much to give and you enjoy giving it. ● Feel loving and protective of your lover. Easily trust them. Appreciate what they can give you. Have friends that celebrate your relationship. And it’s unhealthy if you: ● Want to control your lover and mold her/him into who you want her/him to be. ● Use money/gifts/possessions to get them to do what you want. ● Depend on their youth/ beauty to feel youthful/attractive yourself. ● Avoid making peace with your own aging. ● Feel that you’re being used (e.g., playing the “sugar daddy/mama” role). What to do about all this? If you’re thinking about dating someone considerably older or younger than you are, look closely and honestly at your motivations. Take a look at the above lists: Do you see yourself in any of them? If so, are you dating her/him from a healthy or unhealthy place? Pay attention to power imbalances — younger people usually have less power in the relationship, and they’re not as experienced in life, so their enthusiasm can be easily manipulated. Money is a big factor here; older people usually have

more money, and — as a result — have a lot more power in the relationship. How will the two of you handle this? If your partner is just a trophy to show off to your friends and coworkers, you’re heading for trouble. On the other hand, if you’ve met someone much older or younger, you’ve gotten to know each other, and over time, have openly shared your expectations, where you currently are in life, and even your goals for the future, you could be in for a great experience. Lots of similarly-aged couples jump into relationships assuming that because they’re so alike, everything is going to be easy. This typically leads to major problems when they — inevitably — encounter their fi rst differences. Older/younger couples are rarely so naïve. They usually anticipate age-related challenges and go into their relationships much wiser. Remember: It’s not the age difference that matters, it’s how you handle it. Be smart, aware and honest and you’re likely to make it work, regardless of age. —Michael Kimmel is a licensed psychotherapist who specializes in helping LGBT clients achieve their goals and deal with anxiety, depression, grief, sexually addictive behavior, coming out, relationship challenges and homophobia. Contact him at 619955-3311 or visit▼



GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017

Letters Tesloop interest

[Ref: “Taking a loop in a Tesla,” Vol. 8, Issue 23, or online at] Thank you very much for this most informative article. I have seen this service featured on TV but did not have the details. I appreciate it very much and look forward to your next article in this series. All the best. —Jerry Peterson, via

Some backstory

[Ref: “A tremendous splash of color,” Vol. 8, Issue 22, or online at]


Dillingham LGBT Leadership authentic selves at the same Award at the start of the Nov. 9 time was not allowed in the event and gave the first awards U.S. armed forces. to Dr. Delores Jacobs and Long before the Department Bridget Wilson in Ben’s honor. of Defense directive known as We also honored transgender The Veterans Wall of Honor — “don’t ask, don’t tell, don’t pursue” service members that night and the decision to put Ben and — its original catch-phrase, due and I know Ben would have Bridget’s name on it — was the to the legendary witch hunts — been proud to hear the voices of idea of Nicole Murray-Ramirez, was put into place in 1994, Ben those who spoke at the podium a San Diego city commissioner, served a distinguished eight— an active duty trans service LGBT and Latino activist, and year career as a Marine Corps member and two transgender a longtime supporter of our local officer. He knew he was gay; inductees — and to see the LGBT military. thankfully, he resigned his comlarge number of transgender Ramirez visualized a space mission before they knew. active duty and veterans who at The Center to honor veterAfter leaving the service, ans who served in silence in the Ben and Bridget forged their in- were present in the crowd and stood when we asked them to. wake of the military’s discrimdividual paths as true pioneers Ben Dillingham’s passing has inatory “don’t ask, don’t tell” for equality, becoming aggresleft a huge legacy of philanthropolicy that was finally repealed sive activists and supporters py, support, activism, leadership, in September 2011. of the repeal effort in myriad and both quiet and assertive The wall’s unveiling — and ways. guidance to others in the greater its inaugural induction cerAlways a strong presence at local LGBT community that will emony, which included Ben, each induction ceremony, Ben be hard to replace or best. Bridget, Jeri Dilno and Jim preferred to sit near the back For me, I’m proud that Woodward — was held Nov. 10, and just take it all in. While he his name and contributions 2011, and has been held on the didn’t like us to make a big deal will always be remembered Thursday prior to Veterans of his presence, he’d stand or wave whenever we announced every November during the Day every year since. To watch his name and I always sensed he LGBT Veterans Wall induction a portion of the inaugural was incredibly proud to be there. ceremony. induction ceremony, which inHe did, however, on at least I think we’ll save a chair for cludes Ben speaking, visit bit. one occasion, have to educate him in the back next year … ly/2mPkSPc. the advisory council that the and every year after. Ben and Bridget were handorder of the flags we had on disFair winds and following picked by Ramirez as the wall’s play at the ceremony was inseas, sir. namesake’s — Bridget likes to correct (his Marine Corps flag joke that they had no choice in was out of precedence). That is —Morgan M. Hurley is edthe matter — but their individsomething we’ve made sure to itor of Gay San Diego. Reach ual military histories, accomget right every year since. her at plishments and dedication to Though his health kept him the local LGBT community is from attending this year’s cerFrom The Center’s website: well-known to most. They both emony for the first time, Ben’s The Benjamin F. Dillingham served their country at a time presence was felt. First, Ramirez III & Bridget Wilson LGBT when doing their jobs the best announced the new Ben Veterans Wall of Honor as they could and living their

I wrote about this property sometime back [in The Reader, found here bit. ly/2zpZeqw and here bit. ly/2hIx1jp]. The owner is Alexander Pellegrino; he is not a tenant. The General Store was always a tenant, not an owner. The company got into trouble when it renovated the building without city permits, and they were fined $1,000. Pellegrino was always very difficult to get information from. The building to the east had multiple tenants, even a weed store once. It didn’t last long. As for The General Store, it never was busy when I went by, and I don’t know how they stayed in business so long. Parking was iffy, as was getting in/out. It was a terrible location for a retailer, even though the store was cool. I never understood why they leased that space. It was unwise. —David Batterson, via email ▼

A legacy not soon forgotten By Morgan M. Hurley We lost an important leader and philanthropist in the local LGBT community last week: Benjamin F. Dillingham III. I never formally met Ben, but having been involved with the Benjamin F. Dillingham III & Bridget Wilson LGBT Veterans Wall of Honor in the auditorium of the San Diego LGBT Community Center in Hillcrest — serving on its advisory council since the year after its inception and as co-chair these last two years — his legacy has had a huge impact on my life. Ben was born and raised in the Hawaiian Islands. While in the Navy, I was stationed in Hawaii for four and a half years on active duty and then returned annually for nearly a decade while serving in the Navy Reserves. A few years ago when I made the connection that Ben’s family was THAT Dillingham family, I was in awe. As a young sailor working swing shifts in Pearl Harbor, I drove down Dillingham Boulevard three times a week to attend classes at Honolulu Community College. His family’s roots were legendary there and here he was, already a legend in San Diego. EDITOR Morgan M. Hurley (619) 961-1960 CONTRIBUTING EDITORS (619) 519-7775 Ken Williams, x102 Jeff Clemetson, x119 CONTRIBUTING WRITERS David Dixon Michael Kimmel Jean Lowerison Ian Morton Joyell Nevins Frank Sabatini Jr WEB AND SOCIAL MEDIA Sara Butler, x120

COPY EDITOR Dustin Lothspeich SALES & MARKETING DIRECTOR Mike Rosensteel (619) 961-1958 ADVERTISING CONSULTANTS (619) 519-7775 Annie Burchard, x 105 Michele Camarda, x116 Heather Fine, x107 Sloan Gomez, x104 Brenda Vergara, x110 INTERNS Alex Ehrie Jennifer Gottschalk Erik Guerrero Amanda Lee Denise White

ACCOUNTING Priscilla Umel-Martinez (619) 961-1962 WEB DESIGN Kim Espinoza

DISTRIBUTION Gay San Diego is distributed free every other Friday of the month. © 2017. All rights reserved. PUBLISHER David Mannis (619) 961-1951

recognizes lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender veterans with ties to San Diego who have taken the oath to serve our country and have done so honorably, and with distinction, acting as role models in advancing equality. The Veterans Wall commemorates these veterans’ lives in hopes that their courage, bravery and sacrifices will continue to inspire future generations. For a list of those inducted to The LGBT Veterans Wall so far, visit bit. ly/2A1xANW.▼

OPINIONS/LETTERS: Gay San Diego encourages letters to the editor and guest editorials. Please email either to and include your phone number and address for verification. We reserve the right to edit letters for brevity and accuracy. Letters and guest editorials do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher or staff. Business Improvement Association

SUBMISSIONS/NEWS TIPS Press releases and story ideas are welcomed. Send press releases, tips, photos or story ideas to For breaking news and investigative story ideas contact the editor by phone or email. Copyright © 2017 San Diego Community News Network

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GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017



Benjamin F. Dillingham III (19 45-2017) LGBT and civic activist and leader Ben Dillingham passed away from pancreatic cancer at his home on Thursday, Nov. 16. He was 72. Born Benjamin Franklin Dillingham III in Honolulu, Hawaii, on May 23, 1945, he was the son of Mr. and Mrs. Benjamin F. Dillingham II. A fifth generation descendent of New England missionaries to the Hawaiian Islands, Ben attended Punahou School in Honolulu, and later St. Mark’s School in Southborough, Massachusetts. He holds the distinction of being the first sports manager ever named to the St. Mark’s School Athletic Hall of Fame. Ben attended Harvard College, where he majored in economics and managed teams in football, hockey and lacrosse, graduating cum laude in 1967. He proudly earned six letters in athletics and was vice president of the A.D. Club. Ben then pursued an MBA at the Harvard Business School. With his MBA in hand, Ben became a commissioned officer in the United States Marine Corps. He received a Bronze Star Medal with a Combat V for his service in Vietnam. Additionally, Ben was awarded the Army Commendation Medal for his work on the XM1 Abrams Main Battle Tank prototype. After serving eight years and having attained the rank of captain, Ben returned to civilian life in San Diego. After several years at General Dynamics, Ben became the chief financial officer for the San Diego Metropolitan Transit development board. Under his stewardship, the first light-rail transit system was established in San Diego. In 1986, Ben became chief of staff to San Diego Mayor Maureen O’Connor, and after she left office, continued to manage her affairs. Ben shared his life with three life partners — Dennis Grady Whorton; Fredrick Stann Libby; and Johnny Richard Beck — each who lost their battle with AIDS. Through these relationships and throughout his life, Ben was an influential community leader, and a strong advocate of LGBT rights. Ben served with distinction on many charitable boards of directors over the years, including San Diego AIDS Project; AIDS Foundation San Diego; San Diego Human Dignity Foundation; and Episcopal Community Services, among others. Ben was also a member of the San Diego County Veterans Advisory Council and served as chair of the San Diego County Treasury Oversight Committee. Repeatedly recognized for outstanding community service, Ben was San Diego LGBT Pride’s grand marshal and named man of the year; he received the Harvey Milk Civil Rights Award; the Jos«Julio Sarria International Honor;

the Human Rights Award; the Crystal Torch award from the Human Rights Campaign; the Episcopal Community Services Award for Social Justice; and the Humanitarian Award from the city of San Diego’s Human Relations Committee. Ben was held in such high esteem by his community, that the LGBT Veterans Wall of Honor, located at the San Diego LGBT Community Center, was named after him, along with Bridget Wilson. There is also a Benjamin F. Dillingham III LGBT Leadership Award and the Ben F. Dillingham Community Fund. Ben is survived by his mother, Mrs. Andrews Dillingham; his sister, Mrs. Hugh Watts (Ceseli) Foster; his brother Henry Gaylord Dillingham II; his sister, Mrs. Stuart Harold (Lorie) Rosenwald; as well as treasured in-laws, delightful nieces and nephews, and their offspring, and many good friends and colleagues. Noted for his iron integrity, generosity of spirit, and dedication to the city of San Diego and its LGBT community, Ben Dillingham’s loss will be felt by many and he will be remembered for having lived a varied, accomplished and committed life. Donations in memory of Ben can be sent to the Ben F. Dillingham III Community Fund, PO Box 34104, San Diego, CA 92163. Services for Ben will be held on Saturday, Jan. 20, 2018, at 1 p.m. at St Paul’s Episcopal Cathedral, located at 2728 Sixth Ave. in Bankers Hill.

In tribute

Ben was the fi rst for San Diego. Before Christine Kehoe and before Bonnie Dumanis — there was Ben Dillingham, representing the LGBT community in the halls of power at City Hall. He was chief of staff for Maureen O’Connor. He was a pioneer, a mentor and a statesman. He was the lodestar for those of us aspiring to serve in politics. And he helped make it a reality for many of us. And years later, as I’ve ascended through the ranks of elected politics, I have always felt Ben’s presence. Every so often, I would get a note from Ben, expressing his pride in me for a particular issue — and for representing the LGBT community. He could take you to task too, but he’d always do that in person. Those notes I’ve saved over the years. I feel truly fortunate to have had that kind of relationship and thoughtful attention from a gentleman and a master. Godspeed, Benjamin F. Dillingham, III! —Toni G. Atkins, California state Senator When I was a new staffer at City Hall in 1989, knowing Ben was Mayor O’Connor’s openly gay chief of staff was a beacon for me and many others.

Ben and Bridget pose with the LGBT Veterans Wall Class of 2014, Nov. 6, 2014. (l to r) Frank Stefano (inductee), Dennis Fiordaliso (inductee), Bridget Wilson, Ben Dillingham, Dr. Delores Jacobs, Bob Lehman (inductee), TJ Seguine (inductee) and John Keasler (inductee). (Courtesy Bob Lehman) He was a role model. Ben never lost his Marine bearing, no matter what controversy swept through his office – right outside the mayor’s door. As the years went by, I knew Ben was a quiet, generous and vital supporter of many LGBT organizations. He was compassionate and tireless. With Gloria Johnson, Bill Beck, Mel Merrill, and now Ben, we are losing leaders who paved the way for the proud San Diego LGBT community we know today. —Christine Kehoe, former California state Senator

Our community has lost a true friend, advocate, mentor and gentleman. Ben, I will personally miss you, our phone calls, emails and our many lunch conversations and your always gracious words and encouraging notes telling me never to give up the fight and be proud of what you have accomplished. Rest In Peace, dear friend. You will not be forgotten. —Bill Kelly, local LGBT and senior activist

beautiful home. I am honored to share that space on the LGBT Veterans Wall with him. He was the man with the monogrammed cuffs and old style cuff links. He came from that elite background, prep school, Harvard. Ben was a true gentleman. He also loved deeply. I knew well one of his late partners, Freddie. I cannot think of Ben without thinking of Freddie Stann Libby. Freddie made him laugh. He could have spent the rest of his life with Freddie, but AIDS interfered. Three of the men Ben loved were lost to AIDS. He had a good sense of humor. When the Veterans Wall was dedicated and we both rather uncomfortably faced our names written large above, Ben and I wandered over to take a closer look at it. He pulled me close, literally noses to the plaque in the middle of the wall. He whispered, “There’s a niche behind there for us, I’’ll bet.” We then both chuckled. I kind of wish there were. It would not be a bad way to spend eternity. Friends, please stand and salute, an officer and a gentleman has left the room. Until we meet again old friend. —Bridget Wilson, LGBT activist, veteran and community leader

Two weeks ago I was told of Ben Dillingham’s imminent passing and asked to not spread Benjamin F. Dillingham was that information. I did not. Ben was a very private man, by prefa giant. For more than three erence and necessity. Quietly, he decades he has stood, ramrod gave so much to us. He was a straight, never wavering, as steady contributor to the comthe LGBT community’s symbol munity and important to our of grace, dignity, courage and efforts to repeal “don’t ask, don’t integrity. He was the epitome tell,” among so many causes. of an officer and a gentleman. He came from one of the Whether with private and extraordinary notes of encourage- founding families of the Territory/State of Hawaii, or ment to community members, the one of those who seized or with powerful and incisive Hawaii from its natives, deand insistent truths spoken to pending on which narrative powerful officials, he has been you read. I had no idea that the community’s courageous Ben came from a wealthy famchampion for justice, for truth ily that made its fortune in and for dignity. As he passes shipping, construction, and of from us, we cannot help but stand and salute his exemplary course was involved in Hawaii’s politics. lifetime of service. I met him at a party in the —Dr. Delores A. Jacobs, CEO, mid-’80s and we chatted. I The Center The world will not soon forwent back to my spouse Kim, get the ultimate gentle man herself born in Hilo and reared Ben Dillingham was a very and gentleman we knew as Ben in Honolulu, and said, “Oh, patriotic American, proud Dillingham. His steady hand of Kim, you should talk to Ben, Marine, caring Christian, alyou have something in common, leadership, quiet and immeaways-giving philanthropist, a surable generosity, courageous you are both from Hawaii.” major GLBT leader and true and loving heart, gentle spirit She came back to me chuckpublic servant, who I had the and constant spirit of encourling, “Bridget, Ben Dillingham honor of being friends with for agement is irreplaceable and a doesn’t come from Hawaii, he over 30 years. loss beyond words to our LGBT owns Hawaii.” He did not own When the history of the San community and humankind in Hawaii, but the Dillinghams Diego GLBT community is general. are carved into the modern written, Ben will go down as I personally will miss 34 history of the state with names one of the trailblazers and heyears of his friendship, his like Dole. roes who was loved by all. insight, his kind notes and He left for just that reason. —Nicole Murray Ramirez, wisdom and passion for social city commissioner for the city of He knew that he would nevjustice and human rights. Ben er be anything but a son of San Diego and longtime LGBT Dillingham loved his country, Dillingham, never be his own and Latino activist loved his community, loved his man there. Here he was. He A sad goodbye to my felfamily and those dear to him was deeply involved, for examlow Marine and friend Ben Dillingham who has been an and inspired all of us to be our ple, in the development of the inspiration and mentor for more best and do our best. San Diego trolley system. And, than 20 years. His legacy both When you look up the word of course, he was gay. It was as an USMC officer and as “honorable” in the dictionary, better to get away from the old a community leader will live the fi rst definition will be Ben hometown. on, including the fitting tribDillingham. Thank you Ben Most of my contacts with ute to him of The Benjamin and may you rest in peace him came from work on LGBT F. Dillingham, III & Bridget knowing you ran your race military and AIDS struggles. Wilson LGBT Veterans Wall of with valor and fought the He was a Vietnam veteran, Honor. That’s Ben, the distingood fight. You finished your where as a Marine officer he guished tall man shown in the journey leaving a lasting legwas awarded the Bronze Star photo (center) in his trademark acy that will never be forgotwith a combat “V.” He never suit and tie [photo is on this lost his dedication to that cause. ten. Godspeed Ben Franklin page]. Dillingham III. We all remember fundraisers —Bob Lehman, executive di—Susan Jester, local LGBT for the Servicemembers Legal rector, SD Gay Men's Chorus activist and community leader▼ Defense Network at Ben’s



GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017


INVENTORY learning centers with after-school programs; financial, cooking and fitness classes for the parents; life coaching; and other services. Even the organization’s vision on its website is affirming: “We believe with a stable home, powerful tools, and community support, people can move themselves up in the world.” Come January, CHW’s latest development, the North Park Senior Apartments — the first one marketed as LGBTaffirming and currently in its final stages of construction — will begin accepting its first tenants. The complex is located at the northwest corner of Texas Street and Howard Avenue, one block south of El Cajon Boulevard. It too will have support services for its residents, which will be managed onsite by the Senior Services department of the San Diego LGBT Community Center in Hillcrest. Services will be focused around continued independence and health so the residents can age in place. The facility will include a garden patio and a community space that has access from the street where she said they plan to host events that are open to the greater community. Once residents get settled in, a grand opening will be scheduled, possibly in February or March. While Reynolds assured that CHW does all they can to make each of their apartment communities as accepting and inclusive as possible, this particular project has been an exciting and satisfying evolution. “My joke about it is that when I was a young lesbian sitting around with my friends joking about the ‘old dykes home,’ I never really thought I’d get old and I certainly never thought I’d be building it,” she said. “It is a special privilege.

The North Park Senior Apartments, on the northwest corner of Texas Street and Howard Avenue, will start accepting residents in January. (Photo by Bill Kelly) Every community we build has a special story, but this one is special in a personal way.” Because the development was marketed as LGBTaffirming, everyone who applied knew, without a doubt, that they would be surrounded by neighbors from the LGBT community, and they would have to be supportive of that. The obvious expectation is that most of the residents of the North Park complex will be LGBT seniors, but CHW could not reverse discriminate by stating it would only accept applications from the LGBT community. “It is illegal to discriminate against folks based on their LGBT+ status, and you can’t have it both ways,” Reynolds said. “It is really pretty simple. We won that years and years ago through (former state Senator) Sheila Kuehl and other LGBT state legislators — we won those protections and those protections need to be enforced. “If those protections were really working people would

not be longing for this so much. Because you might be able to protect yourself from landlord discrimination but you can’t protect yourself as easily from neighbor attitude,” she said. To emphasize the inclusiveness of their other communities, Reynolds said they have a mixed-race lesbian couple living in a Lakeside complex and a transgender military veteran living in a Fallbrook development. “As an owner, it’s all about creating the friendliest community we can manage to create but certainly [North Park Senior Apartments] is going to feel different and special,” she said. Once residents get moved into one of CHW’s communities, they tend to stay put as long as they can, so there is less turnover than most. While it is CHW’s goal to better the circumstances of each resident, no one will be pushed out; in addition, Reynolds is not a supporter of wait lists. Residents got into the North Park Senior Apartments by way of a lottery and 500 people were chosen. The wait list is currently closed and may not reopen again for years. “Some folks make their wait lists open constantly, but particularly for senior communities, we are going to a system of not keeping them open, because I think it keeps people up at night,” Reynolds said. “I think it’s unkind.

“If I have 3,000 people on a wait list for North Park Seniors, I’ve just increased the worrying and the loss of sleep at night for thousands of people, and most of them don’t have a real chance of getting in,” she said. A resident of San Diego for 28 years, Reynolds has been in a relationship with her now-wife Allison for 29 years. They got married in the first window of opportunity in 2008 and live between Hillcrest and Mission Hills. She first became concerned with the housing conditions of the less fortunate as a teenager working with a minister who ran a community development program in her home state of Ohio and decided to make it her life’s work. “I got mad at the conditions that people were living under,” Reynolds said. “I got inspired by the people I met who were struggling through poverty in some pretty inspiring ways. And I was hooked. I’ve been doing housing and community-related work ever since I got out of college.” CHW has two more senior developments in the wings and in time would be open to shepherding in another LGBTaffirming complex. Reynolds said several other cities within the state are watching closely and interested in doing what San Diego has done. The need for affordable housing has always existed, Reynolds said, but it was never as “desperate” as it is today. She said that

50-percent of San Diego renters are paying too much of their budget towards housing and it is “squeezing out” income they could be spending elsewhere. This impacts the economy. “If it’s happening to that many people it can’t be their fault,” she said. “It’s taken us decades, literally, of public policy decisions that were not forward-thinking about this, to get us to where we are today. It’s going to take incredible leadership by folks like our mayor and City Council and the governor and state legislators every year for a number of years to get us out of it.” Next fall, Reynolds said there will be a statewide bond issue on the ballot that would allow CHW to build thousands of affordable apartments throughout the county. For now, however, she’s focused on the quality of life of the residents in her current communities. “Once folks are home with us, they are home,” Reynolds said. “The stability of the home is the beginning of so many things. I want to be part of people’s health, not their worry.”

How you can help

As a nonprofit, Community HousingWorks is always looking for ways to offset their costs. The North Park Senior Apartments cost $28 million to build, most of which came from grants and low-interest bank loans, but maintenance costs and support programs incur other financial demands. Their biggest fundraiser of the year is Dream Builder in October, but on Nov. 28, Giving Tuesday — a global day of giving and philanthropy — you can designate CHW as your benefactor. Their theme is “Transforming Communities” and you can follow updates on their Facebook page, follow them on Twitter or subscribe to their newsletter. You can also donate directly to them on their webpage. In addition, CHW is always looking for volunteers to help with their support programs and classes, and with 30 communities, there is sure to be one near you. For more information about Community HousingWorks, or to check for availability in any of their community properties, visit —Morgan M. Hurley can be reached at morgan@sdcnn. com.▼

(l to r) Dr. Delores Jacobs, Sue Reynolds, and Robert Bettinger in San Diego City Council chambers, waiting their turn to speak about the importance of LGBT-affirming senior housing. (Photo by Bill Kelly)


GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017



VISUAL AIDS He landed in the hospital for several reasons, spent five days hovering near death, and “remarkably” came out on the side of recovery. “I see it as having a second chance,” Stillman continued. “I decided to stop carrying all these things on my back, all my self-doubt. I wanted to take this opportunity to live my life more fully.” He dove into the artistic world and started collaborating with other San Diego artists. The Studio Door, which Stillman opened in North Park in 2014, came out of a desire to surround himself with art and help other artists reach their dreams as well. Through his networking, Stillman met Patrick Brown, his co-coordinator of the Day With(out) Art, who first got him connected to Visual AIDS. Visual AIDS is a national collective dedicated to fighting AIDS and provoking dialogue, along with supporting HIVpositive artists. Its program director is Alex Fialho, a former San Diegan. Last June, Fialho agreed to jury “Proud,” a visual arts exhibition at The Studio Door that celebrated LGBTQIA artists in honor of the Stonewall Riots. From that connection, Stillman learned of a documentary titled “Alternative Endings, Radical Beginnings” that Visual AIDS was screening during its Day With(out) Art this year. The film is a collection of videos from African-American artists Mykki Blanco, Cheryl Dunye and Ellen Spiro, Reina Gossett, Thomas Allen Harris, Kia LaBeija, Tiona Nekkia McClodden and Brontez Purnell. According to Visual AIDS, the film is meant to “prioritize black narratives within the ongoing AIDS epidemic.” Now get ready for some disturbing statistics: The Center for Disease Control (CDC) released a study earlier this year reporting that in 2015, approximately 17,670 AfricanAmericans received a diagnosis of HIV infection — almost half of all those diagnosed in the U.S. The study also noted that black, gay and bisexual men are the most affected by HIV. If current rates persist, the CDC projects that approximately 1 in 20 black men, 1 in 48 black women, and 1 in 2 black gay and bisexual men will receive an HIV diagnosis during their lifetimes.

A sampling of the postcards painted by local artists for the current San Diego installment of Visual AIDS' "Postcards from the Edge" exhibition. The NYC exhibit turns 20 this year. (Courtesy The Studio Door) But the Day With(out) Art event, while not ignoring these stark facts, lands in a place of hope. It has been a collaborative effort, not only on a national level, but locally as well. “It’s a big deal. I’m real excited to help bring this to San Diego,” Stillman said, extending gratitude to all those involved. “I’m amazed that we were able to get so many people on board so quickly, and I hope this can be an annual collaboration.” The event is being held in conjunction with the benefit art sale, “Postcards from the Edge.” Also started in New York City, Visual AIDS is celebrating the 20th anniversary of its annual “Postcards” fundraiser this year. For the San Diego edition, artists from across the region have created postcards telling stories of how AIDS has affected their lives. The local postcards are on display and available for purchase at The Studio Door, Escondido Arts Partnership, and the Media Arts Center. The postcards are $75 each: $25 goes to support the film screening, $25 goes to Visual AIDS, and $25 will become part of a grant to help fund a local HIV-positive artist or organization that works in that field, as chosen by The Studio Door and Escondido Arts Project. The screening of “Alternative Endings, Radical Beginnings,” will be held at 6 and 7:30 p.m. on Saturday, Dec. 2, at the Media Arts Center, located in the Digital Gym at 2921 El Cajon Blvd. The Postcards from the Edge sale will run through the end of the year. For more information, visit or call 619-255-4920. —Joyell Nevins is a local freelance writer. Reach her at or find her blog Small World, Big God at swbgblog.wordpress. com.▼

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GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017

The big SoNo Chili Cook-off is coming to the neighborhood where 32nd and Thorn streets meet. (Photo by Arlene Ibarra)

La Paz ceviche with bigeye tuna and orange zest at Ceviche House (Photo|by|Frank Sabatini Jr.)

The relocated Ceviche House, which originally launched four years ago at local farmers markets and then opened as a brick-and-mortar eatery in North Park, is now up and running at its new home in Old Town. The space is larger and more stylish in comparison, and with indoor-outdoor seating and signature ceviches inspired from different regions

of Mexico. Chef-partner Juan Carlos Recamier’s expanded menu features fresh oysters with mignonette sauce and several hot dishes such as grilled octopus and steamed or pan-seared local fish. 2415 San Diego Ave., Suite 109, 619-795-2438,

Get your chili fix — and lots of it — at the eighth annual SoNo Fest and Chili Cookoff, from 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Dec. 3, at 32nd and Thorn streets. The event ushers in nearly 40 local restaurants competing

for top chili honors as they dole out samples to attendees. It also features a beer and wine garden, live music and a kid’s zone. Tickets are $20, which includes five chili tastings in a ceramic bowl guests get to keep.

Presented by McKinley Elementary School and the San Diego Ceramic Connection, proceeds go to art and music programs for McKinley students.

Second Chance Beer Co., which recently opened a tasting lounge in North Park, is supplying the brews for a five-course “chef vs. chef” beer dinner from 6:30–9:30 p.m., Nov. 29, at Urge Common House in San Marcos.

Chefs Eric Lobner of Urge Whiskey Bank in Oceanside and Trevor Chappell of The Barrel Room in Rancho Bernardo will each pair a dish to five different Second Chance

beers such as Take Two Brown Ale and Seize the Coffee IPA. Guests will vote on their favorites. The price is $75 per person. 255 Redel Road, San Marcos, 760-7988822,

The annual tradition of turkey mole tacos and other holiday fare has returned to dining rooms throughout San Diego County at Bazaar Del Mundo Restaurants, including Casa Guadalajara in Old Town (4105 Taylor St.). The tamales, available through Jan. 1, are filled with roasted turkey as well as raisins, pecans and apples. They’re topped with rich mole sauce and sesame seeds. Other restaurants serving them are Casa de Pico (5500 Grossmont Center Drive, La Mesa), Casa de Bandini (1901

Calle Barcelona, Carlsbad), and Casa Sol y Mar (12865 El Camino Real, Del Mar).

A new, casual spot for craft beer, creatively sauced chicken wings and other bar fare has opened near Windansea Beach in La Jolla. Nautilus Tavern replaces the La Jolla Tap and Grill with a refreshed interior, nearly 30 beers on tap and reasonably

priced wines. The varied food menu includes marinated beef tips, “grown up” grilled cheese sandwiches, burgers, and wings in assorted flavors, such as maple-bacon-bourbon. 6830 La Jolla Blvd., 858-750-2056,

True Food Kitchen has arrived to the remodeled UTC shopping mall. (Photo by Bradley Schweit Photograph)

A second San Diego location of True Food Kitchen has opened in La Jolla’s University Town Center, which recently underwent a major makeover to its gardens, plaza areas and retail spaces. The restaurant, which has an established location in Fashion Valley Mall, took over

Get your turkey mole tamales in Old Town (Courtesy Bazaar del Mundo Restaurants)

9,000 square feet of indoor-outdoor space for the new outlet. Eco-friendly design elements include herb-filled garden basins, hardwood floors and chairs made out of recycled soda bottles. The menu features an array of seasonally driven dishes rooted in the principles of Dr. Andrew Weil’s anti-inflammatory diet. True Food currently has 21 locations in several U.S. states. 4303 La Jolla Village Drive, Suite 2100, 858-431-4384, —Frank Sabatini Jr. can be reached at fsabatini▼


Healthy mix-ups Restaurant Review Frank Sabatini Jr. The meal options are wholesome, the “sauce bar” is inviting, and many of the customers appear hale and hearty. Welcome of Elva’s Bowls & Wraps, a basic continuation of what used to be Crazy Bowls & Wraps before Marvin Fleschman and his wife, Elva Rodriguez, purchased the business nearly a year ago as “a hobby” to augment their retirement. He was in real estate and she catered banquets for hotels and country clubs in Los Angeles. “I bought what the former owner created,” said Fleschman, referring to a string of healthy fast-casual eateries the unnamed restaurateur ran before closing his San Diego locations and moving to the Midwest. Fleschman kept alive only the Mission Valley space and Rodriguez became something of a frontline ambassador to the re-branded business, per her headshots seen on the website and inside the restaurant, and “Elva” used in the new identity. “I always wanted my name in lights,” she quipped, while pointing out her banana-nut bread with raisins that she added to the menu. Also new are a few breakfast items, plus strawberry, watermelon and pear salads, year-round soups, and Halabah, which are semi-sweet Jewish candy bars made of crushed sesame seeds. They’re rich and tasty and jive to the eatery’s creed of healthy eating. Otherwise, the offerings of fresh produce, sustainable proteins and healthy grains used in the construction of numerous types of meal bowls and sandwich wraps remain intact. Customers can create their own by picking and choosing from the long list of ingredients. Or they can order from an established repertoire of bowls and wraps as we did, although you’re still faced with decisions. From the “power bowls” category we opted for “the fajita” comprising a garden’s worth of

Elva’s Bowls & Wraps

veggies along with cheddar, jalapeno-cilantro sauce and fresh lime. We were tasked, however, with choosing a size (small over large), a grain (noodles instead of quinoa or brown or jasmine rice) and a protein (beef tenderloin instead of wild-caught salmon, hormone-free chicken breast or tofu). The gamble we took mixing long noodles into a fajita concept turned out surprisingly well. They were a tasty magnet for the earthy juices exuded by all of the grilled veggies, not to mention the beefy juices that originated from the tenderloin. For the Thai wrap, which includes peanut sauce and commendably spicy coleslaw, we chose a tomato tortilla, quinoa and the salmon. We also decided to have the entire wrap lightly grilled, an option that staffers at the order counter rightfully recommended. The flavors were clean and invigorating. And psychologically, we cherished the notion of all nine essential amino acids rushing through our bodies from the quinoa along with beneficial omega-3 fat provided by the generous measures of flaky salmon. (Bring on that mischievous banana bread!)

Another wrap, the Mediterranean, was a little saltier than I preferred due to feta cheese and briny kalamata olives acting in concert. For that, we chose a wheat tortilla, no grains, and grilled chicken. Tzatziki sauce came inside the wrap, but it was plain-tasting. So, I drizzled into the fold some of the sun-dried tomato ranch dressing that accompanied a lively, colorful Santa Fe salad we previously ordered. From the complimentary sauce bar, you can jazz up your food or house-made tortilla chips with condiments such as Asian hiyashi, creamy Buffalo sauce, pico de gallo and jalapeno-cilantro salsa. There’s also fresh ginger, mint and oranges, plus velvety hummus, which cried for a little garlic or tahini on this particular day. Elva’s Bowls & Wraps will celebrate its one-year anniversary on Dec. 19 with soda fountain drinks of any size or flavor available for 50 cents each all day. Yes, sugar sneaks into the place in more ways than one, but nobody’s pointing fingers if you partake.


The fajita bowl with beef tenderloin and noodles

Chicken, feta and veggies in the Mediterranean wrap

The Santa Fe salad

—Frank Sabatini Jr. is the author of “Secret San Diego” (ECW Press), and began his local writing career more than two decades ago as a staffer for the former San Diego Tribune. You can reach him at▼

A grilled Thai wrap with quinoa, salmon and spicy slaw

Owner Elva Rodriquez wants you to eat a healthy diet. (Photo by Frank Sabatini Jr.)

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GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017



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GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017

What is TRUVADA for PrEP?

Who should not take TRUVADA for PrEP?

TRUVADA for PrEP (pre-exposure prophylaxis) is a prescription medicine that is used together with safer sex practices to help reduce the risk of getting HIV-1 through sex. This use is only for HIV-negative adults who are at high risk of getting HIV-1. To help determine your risk of getting HIV-1, talk openly with your healthcare provider about your sexual health.

Do not take TRUVADA for PrEP if you:

Ask your healthcare provider if you have questions about how to prevent getting HIV. Always practice safer sex and use condoms to lower the chance of sexual contact with body fluids. Never reuse or share needles or other items that have body fluids on them.

IMPORTANT SAFETY INFORMATION What is the most important information I should know about TRUVADA for PrEP? Before taking TRUVADA for PrEP:  You must be HIV-negative before you start taking TRUVADA for PrEP. You must get tested to make sure that you do not already have HIV-1. Do not take TRUVADA to reduce the risk of getting HIV-1 unless you are confirmed to be HIV-negative.  Many HIV-1 tests can miss HIV-1 infection in a person who has recently become infected. If you have flu-like symptoms, you could have recently become infected with HIV-1. Tell your healthcare provider if you had a flu-like illness within the last month before starting or at any time while taking TRUVADA for PrEP. Symptoms of new HIV-1 infection include tiredness, fever, joint or muscle aches, headache, sore throat, vomiting, diarrhea, rash, night sweats, and/or enlarged lymph nodes in the neck or groin. While taking TRUVADA for PrEP:  You must continue to use safer sex practices. Just taking TRUVADA for PrEP may not keep you from getting HIV-1.  You must stay HIV-negative to keep taking TRUVADA for PrEP:  Get tested for HIV-1 at least every 3 months.  If you think you were exposed to HIV-1, tell your healthcare provider right away.  To further help reduce your risk of getting HIV-1:  Know your HIV status and the HIV status of your partners.  Get tested for other sexually transmitted infections. Other infections make it easier for HIV to infect you.  Get information and support to help reduce risky sexual behavior, such as having fewer sex partners.  Do not miss any doses of TRUVADA. Missing doses may increase your risk of getting HIV-1 infection.  If you do become HIV-1 positive, you need more medicine than TRUVADA alone to treat HIV-1. TRUVADA by itself is not a complete treatment for HIV-1. If you have HIV-1 and take only TRUVADA, your HIV-1 may become harder to treat over time. TRUVADA can cause serious side effects:  Worsening of hepatitis B (HBV) infection. TRUVADA is not approved to treat HBV. If you have HBV and stop taking TRUVADA, your HBV may suddenly get worse. Do not stop taking TRUVADA without first talking to your healthcare provider, as they will need to monitor your health.

 Already have HIV-1 infection or if you do not know your HIV-1 status. If you are HIV-1 positive, you need to take other medicines with TRUVADA to treat HIV-1. TRUVADA by itself is not a complete treatment for HIV-1. If you have HIV-1 and take only TRUVADA, your HIV-1 may become harder to treat over time.  Also take certain medicines to treat hepatitis B infection.

What are the other possible side effects of TRUVADA for PrEP? Serious side effects of TRUVADA may also include:  Kidney problems, including kidney failure. Your healthcare provider may do blood tests to check your kidneys before and during treatment with TRUVADA. If you develop kidney problems, your healthcare provider may tell you to stop taking TRUVADA.  Too much lactic acid in your blood (lactic acidosis), which is a serious but rare medical emergency that can lead to death. Tell your healthcare provider right away if you get these symptoms: weakness or being more tired than usual, unusual muscle pain, being short of breath or fast breathing, stomach pain with nausea and vomiting, cold or blue hands and feet, feel dizzy or lightheaded, or a fast or abnormal heartbeat.  Severe liver problems, which in rare cases can lead to death. Tell your healthcare provider right away if you get these symptoms: skin or the white part of your eyes turns yellow, dark “tea-colored” urine, light-colored stools, loss of appetite for several days or longer, nausea, or stomach-area pain.  Bone problems, including bone pain, softening, or thinning, which may lead to fractures. Your healthcare provider may do tests to check your bones. Common side effects in people taking TRUVADA for PrEP are stomach-area (abdomen) pain, headache, and decreased weight. Tell your healthcare provider if you have any side effects that bother you or do not go away.

What should I tell my healthcare provider before taking TRUVADA for PrEP?  All your health problems. Be sure to tell your healthcare provider if you have or have had any kidney, bone, or liver problems, including hepatitis.  If you are pregnant or plan to become pregnant. It is not known if TRUVADA can harm your unborn baby. If you become pregnant while taking TRUVADA for PrEP, talk to your healthcare provider to decide if you should keep taking TRUVADA.  If you are breastfeeding (nursing) or plan to breastfeed. Do not breastfeed. If you become HIV-positive, HIV can be passed to the baby in breast milk.  All the medicines you take, including prescription and over-the-counter medicines, vitamins, and herbal supplements. TRUVADA may interact with other medicines. Keep a list of all your medicines and show it to your healthcare provider and pharmacist when you get a new medicine.  If you take certain other medicines with TRUVADA, your healthcare provider may need to check you more often or change your dose. These medicines include certain medicines to treat hepatitis C (HCV) infection. You are encouraged to report negative side effects of prescription drugs to the FDA. Visit, or call 1-800-FDA-1088.

Please see Important Facts about TRUVADA for PrEP including important warnings on the following page.

GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017

I’m passionate, not impulsive. I know who I am. And I make choices that fit my life. TRUVADA for PrEP™ is a once-daily prescription medicine that can help reduce the risk of getting HIV-1 when taken every day and used together with safer sex practices.  TRUVADA for PrEP is only for adults who are at high risk of getting HIV through sex.  You must be HIV-negative before you start taking TRUVADA for PrEP.

Ask your doctor about your risk of getting HIV-1 infection and if TRUVADA for PrEP may be right for you.

Learn more at



GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017

IMPORTANT FACTS This is only a brief summary of important information about taking TRUVADA for PrEPTM (pre-exposure prophylaxis) to help reduce the risk of getting HIV-1 infection. This does not replace talking to your healthcare provider about your medicine.



Before starting TRUVADA for PrEP:

• Those in the “Most Important Information About TRUVADA for PrEP” section. • New or worse kidney problems, including kidney failure. • Too much lactic acid in your blood (lactic acidosis), which is a serious but rare medical emergency that can lead to death. Tell your healthcare provider right away if you get these symptoms: weakness or being more tired than usual, unusual muscle pain, being short of breath or fast breathing, stomach pain with nausea and vomiting, cold or blue hands and feet, feel dizzy or lightheaded, or a fast or abnormal heartbeat. • Severe liver problems, which in rare cases can lead to death. Tell your healthcare provider right away if you get these symptoms: skin or the white part of your eyes turns yellow, dark “tea-colored” urine, light-colored stools, loss of appetite for several days or longer, nausea, or stomach-area pain. • Bone problems.

• You must be HIV-1 negative. You must get tested to make sure that you do not already have HIV-1. Do not take TRUVADA for PrEP to reduce the risk of getting HIV-1 unless you are confirmed to be HIV-1 negative. • Many HIV-1 tests can miss HIV-1 infection in a person who has recently become infected. Symptoms of new HIV-1 infection include flu-like symptoms, tiredness, fever, joint or muscle aches, headache, sore throat, vomiting, diarrhea, rash, night sweats, and/or enlarged lymph nodes in the neck or groin. Tell your healthcare provider if you have had a flu-like illness within the last month before starting TRUVADA for PrEP. While taking TRUVADA for PrEP: • You must continue to use safer sex practices. Just taking TRUVADA for PrEP may not keep you from getting HIV-1. • You must stay HIV-negative to keep taking TRUVADA for PrEP. Get tested for HIV-1 at least every 3 months while taking TRUVADA for PrEP. Tell your healthcare provider right away if you think you were exposed to HIV-1 or have a flu-like illness while taking TRUVADA for PrEP. • If you do become HIV-1 positive, you need more medicine than TRUVADA alone to treat HIV-1. If you have HIV-1 and take only TRUVADA, your HIV-1 may become harder to treat over time. • See the “How To Further Reduce Your Risk” section for more information. TRUVADA may cause serious side effects, including: • Worsening of hepatitis B (HBV) infection. TRUVADA is not approved to treat HBV. If you have HBV, your HBV may suddenly get worse if you stop taking TRUVADA. Do not stop taking TRUVADA without first talking to your healthcare provider, as they will need to check your health regularly for several months.

TRUVADA can cause serious side effects, including:

Common side effects in people taking TRUVADA for PrEP include stomach-area (abdomen) pain, headache, and decreased weight. These are not all the possible side effects of TRUVADA. Tell your healthcare provider right away if you have any new symptoms while taking TRUVADA for PrEP. Your healthcare provider will need to do tests to monitor your health before and during treatment with TRUVADA for PrEP.

BEFORE TAKING TRUVADA FOR PrEP Tell your healthcare provider if you: • Have or have had any kidney, bone, or liver problems, including hepatitis. • Have any other medical conditions. • Are pregnant or plan to become pregnant. • Are breastfeeding (nursing) or plan to breastfeed. Do not breastfeed. If you become HIV-positive, HIV can pass to the baby in breast milk. Tell your healthcare provider about all the medicines you take:

ABOUT TRUVADA FOR PrEP TRUVADA for PrEP is a prescription medicine used together with safer sex practices to help reduce the risk of getting HIV-1 through sex. This use is only for HIV-negative adults who are at high risk of getting HIV-1. • To help determine your risk of getting HIV-1, talk openly with your healthcare provider about your sexual health. Do NOT take TRUVADA for PrEP if you: • Already have HIV-1 infection or if you do not know your HIV-1 status. • Take certain medicines to treat hepatitis B infection.

HOW TO TAKE TRUVADA FOR PrEP • Take 1 tablet once a day, every day, not just when you think you have been exposed to HIV-1. • Do not miss any doses. Missing doses may increase your risk of getting HIV-1 infection. • Use TRUVADA for PrEP together with condoms and safer sex practices. • Get tested for HIV-1 at least every 3 months. You must stay HIV-negative to keep taking TRUVADA for PrEP.

• Keep a list that includes all prescription and over-the-counter medicines, vitamins, and herbal supplements, and show it to your healthcare provider and pharmacist. • Ask your healthcare provider or pharmacist about medicines that should not be taken with TRUVADA for PrEP.

HOW TO FURTHER REDUCE YOUR RISK • Know your HIV status and the HIV status of your partners. • Get tested for other sexually transmitted infections. Other infections make it easier for HIV to infect you. • Get information and support to help reduce risky sexual behavior, such as having fewer sex partners. • Do not share needles or personal items that can have blood or body fluids on them.

GET MORE INFORMATION • This is only a brief summary of important information about TRUVADA for PrEP. Talk to your healthcare provider or pharmacist to learn more, including how to prevent HIV infection. • Go to or call 1-800-GILEAD-5 • If you need help paying for your medicine, visit for program information.

TRUVADA FOR PREP, the TRUVADA FOR PREP Logo, the TRUVADA Blue Pill Design, TRUVADA, GILEAD, and the GILEAD Logo are trademarks of Gilead Sciences, Inc., or its related companies. All other marks referenced herein are the property of their respective owners. Version date: April 2017 © 2017 Gilead Sciences, Inc. All rights reserved. TVDC0140 07/17



Broadway San Diego San Diego Civic Theater 1100 Third Ave. 92101 619-570-1100 Broadway/San Diego — a Nederlander presentation — is part of the nationally recognized Nederlander producing company of America, one of the country’s largest and most experienced operators of live theater. Broadway/San Diego made its original debut as the “San Diego Playgoers” in 1976, after presenting “Equus” at the Spreckels Theatre in Downtown San Diego. For several years, San Diego Playgoers presented shows at the Fox Theatre (now Copley Symphony Hall) and the Spreckels, before establishing a permanent home at the San Diego Civic Theatre in 1986,

with occasional presentations at the other venues including the Historic Balboa Theatre. Broadway/San Diego has presented over 375 shows and events, including the record-setting blockbusters “The Phantom of the Opera,” “Miss Saigon,” “The Producers,” “Les Misérables,” “Disney’s The Lion King,” “The Book of Mormon,” “Wicked,” and the much anticipated “Hamilton” in January 2018.

young and young-at-heart began to realize the benefits that such places had to offer. Operated since its inception four years ago by former mortgage banker Kelly McFall, the Consignment Shack was eventually purchased by McFall from her employers on Jan. 1, 2017. McFall feels satisfaction seeing items go back out into the community, and knowing that it really helps people to have a discounted shopping resource. “The community has been really good to us and it’s a great feeling to know we are returning that support,” she says. As an alternative to an inhome three-day estate sale, The Consignment Shack offers a consignment service which is essentially an in-store 90day estate sale. They also offer their consignment services to individuals and/or businesses that simply need help selling a few items.

The Consignment Shack 7835 El Cajon Blvd. La Mesa, CA 91942 619-460-1822 It was 2012 when Macklemore and Ryan Lewis found fame in a song called “Thrift Shop” and it suddenly became hip to shop second-hand stores; people both


GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017


Coronado Playhouse is the oldThe store carries all kinds est, continuously-run community of home furnishings, including theater in San Diego County. The modern, vintage and antique, intimate 100-seat, cabaret-style and even has a large vinyl retheater prides itself on welcoming cord section. Collectibles, especially from the mid-century era, everyone who walks through its doors as family. Whether you are are also popular items. actor or audience, CPH aims to McFall said the challenge of make you feel at home. resale is that you never know CPH’s 2018 season is “A what product will be out on Family Affair,” placing the theme the floor, because it’s all from consignment. At the same time, of “family” downstage-center for a diverse and fascinating exit can be a lot of fun to sort ploration. “The Addams Family,” through the inventory because you never know what treasures “Next To Normal,” “A Man of No Importance,” and “Joseph and the await! Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat” Coronado Playhouse (family-friendly) make up the sea1835 Strand Way son’s four musicals. Coronado, CA 92118 And 2018’s free classic will be 619-435-4856 Shakespeare’s “Macbeth” and CPH continues to push envelopes with yet another San Diego premiere, Coronado Playhouse’s 2018 Mike Bartlett’s lauded and anticseason is themed “A Family Affair.” ipated modern-day masterpiece, There will be four fabulous musi“King Charles III.” cals, three awesome concerts and Also in 2018, three cabarets two terrific plays. featuring great American composers: Jason Robert-Brown, Burt Bacharach and Stephan Sondheim.

Fitness Together 4019 Goldfinch St. 92103 619-794-0014 mission-hills Ryan Gans has been involved in the fitness community for the better part of a decade. His journey in fitness started after suffering a brutal knee injury, which required surgery. It was during knee rehabilitation, to gain

see Holiday Guide, pg 16


GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017


HOLIDAY GUIDE basic function back in his knee, where Ryan’s passion for fitness started. It was the rehab process where Ryan learned the amazing capabilities of the human body. In the years that followed, Ryan found the tools required to improve human performance. Anyone who has trained with Ryan can attest that his workouts are effective in achieving results. The combination of Fitness Together Mission Hills, its private suites, one-on-one focus, and Ryan’s customized workouts, will get you results. Clients are never more than

HOLIDAY GUIDE a couple feet away, proximity-wise, enhancing focus and taking away the fear; the intimidation, and the waiting found in most training/gym scenarios. Clients train in private, fully-equipped suites, on an appointment-only basis, where the focus is totally on and about them, and no one else. Fitness Together brings a highly-efficient process to working out, combining a superior degree of coaching with smart nutrition to get results faster and safer. Your first session is complimentary and more diagnostic in nature, to allow a better understanding of your medical and medicinal backgrounds, as well as previous work out experiences, timelines and goals.

Clients at Fitness Together Mission Hills range across the spectrum, both in age and fitness levels. We meet clients “where they are” fitness and health wise, and safely move the needle in the right direction. One thing that sets Ryan apart from other trainers is that he has tested numerous fitness methodologies and knows first-hand how it affects the human body. Ryan would never give you an exercise or workout he hasn’t done, or wouldn’t do himself. If you are looking to lose a few pounds, make a major comeback from an injury, or are in need to better your body’s performance in any way,

see Holiday Guide, pg 17


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HOLIDAY GUIDE Fitness Together and Ryan Gans are a great choice. See what others are saying about us on YELP.

La Jolla Playhouse 2910 La Jolla Village Drive La Jolla 92037 858-550-1010 La Jolla Playhouse, a Tony Award-winning professional nonprofit theater, is located in the San Diego coastal suburb of La Jolla, on the campus of University of California, San Diego. Its mission is to advance theater as an art form and as a vital social, moral and political platform, by providing unfettered creative opportunities for the leading artists of today and tomorrow. With a youthful spirit and eclectic, artist-driven approach, the Playhouse cultivates a local and national following with an insatiable appetite for audacious and diverse work. The La Jolla Playhouse has received more than 300 awards for theater excellence, including the 1993 Tony Award as America’s outstanding regional theater. More than 30 Playhouse productions have moved to Broadway, garnering a total of 38 Tony Awards. Founded in 1947 by Gregory Peck, Dorothy McGuire and Mel Ferrer, the La Jolla Playhouse is currently led by Artistic Director Christopher Ashley and Managing Director Michael S. Rosenberg. La Jolla Playhouse is nationally acclaimed for its innovative productions of classics, new plays and musicals, and also presents a wide range of education programs that enrich the community and serves 30,000 children, students and adults annually.

The Patio on Goldfinch 4020 Goldfinch St. 92103 619-501-5090 Located in the heart of Mission Hills, The Patio on Goldfinch is the quintessential neighborhood eatery. Stop by for an elevated, yet casual, dining experience and encounter all-day happy hour on Mondays, daily specials, community events and more. Indulge in your favorite breakfast dishes with a classic California brunch and bottomless mimosas every weekend, from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m., and don’t forget to explore the oneof-a-kind cheese cave. Unique within Southern California, the temperature and humidity-controlled cheese cave houses a selection of artisan cheeses that are skillfully aged in-house by their affineur. Starting at 4 p.m. each day, a new and exciting dinner menu is here to tantalize and tempt the taste buds. The Patio on Goldfinch is also your go-to destination for late night dining in Mission Hills; enjoy chef-inspired modern cuisine until 11 p.m. nightly (11:30 p.m.

Friday and Saturday), accompanied by happy hour specials from 10 p.m. to midnight. You’ll want to come back again and again for this seasonal, modern California cuisine. With gluten-free, vegetarian and nut-free options available, The Patio on Goldfinch has something for everyone.

San Diego Repertory Theatre 79 Horton Plaza San Diego, CA 92101 619-544-1000 | San Diego Repertory Theatre produces intimate, exotic, provocative theater. They promote a more inclusive community through vivid works that nourish progressive political and social values and celebrate the multiple voices of our region. San Diego Repertory Theatre feeds the curious soul. They are Downtown San Diego’s resident professional theater — celebrating yearround on our three stages and in their art galleries the diversity and creativity of our community. As the resident and managing company of the Lyceum Theatre, they produce and host over 550 events and performances a year. Currently playing is “Black Pearl Sings!” Two strong women strike up an unlikely friendship that crosses boundaries of power, heritage and privilege. Featuring over 20 folk and spiritual songs, this transcendent tale reveals the bridges that can be built through the power of song. This show is playing through Dec. 17. To purchase tickets, visit the box office at the Horton Plaza location or give us a call.

San Diego Gay Men’s Chorus Jingle at Sycuan! It’s the holly jolliest holiday show of the year! Join the 200 singers, dancers and musicians of the San Diego Gay Men’s Chorus as they present Jingle at Sycuan Casino on Dec. 2 with two shows at 6:30 and 9 p.m. Get your tickets at sdgmc. org, including for the fun Jingle Bus Cruise with a MO’s Bar & Grill pre-party, luxury coach to Sycuan and 6:30 p.m. show tickets all for just $25. You will love this popular holiday spectacular with

wintry and wonderful holiday music from traditional favorites “Silver Bells,” “Joy to the World” and “Jingle Bells,” to modern classics like Elf’s “A Christmas Song” and “You Will Be Found” from Tony-winner Dear Evan Hansen. There will be hilarious holiday mischief including a “Hallelujah Chorus” of singing nuns and our handsome hula dancers take on Bing Crosby’s “Mele Kalikimaka.” Don’t miss San Diego’s favorite holiday tradition Jingle!

The Old Globe Theater 1363 Old Globe Way 92101 619-234-5623 The Old Globe Theatre has been home to the most acclaimed national artists, designers, directors and playwrights in the theater industry. More than 20 productions produced at The Old Globe have gone on to play Broadway and off-Broadway, garnering a total of 13 Tony Awards and numerous nominations. In 1984, The Old Globe was the recipient of the Tony Award for outstanding regional theater, for its contribution to the development of the art form. These awards bring world attention, not only to The Old Globe, but also to San Diego’s rich cultural landscape. Located off of El Prado in Balboa Park –– between the San Diego Museum of Art and the Museum of Man — The Old Globe Theatre is proud to present its annual family musical, “Dr. Seuss’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas!” with performances between Nov. 4 and Dec 24. The show is described as a wonderful, whimsical musical, based upon the classic Dr. Seuss book. Back at The Old Globe for its 20th incredible year, this family-favorite features the songs “This Time of Year,” “Santa for a Day,” and “Fah Who Doraze,” the delightful carol from the popular animated version of “How the Grinch Stole Christmas!” Celebrate the holidays as The Old Globe Theatre is once again transformed into the snow-covered Whoville, right down to the last can of Whohash. For more information and tickets, visit our website.▼

GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017











The cast of SUMMER: THE DONNA SUMMER MUSICAL. Photo by Kevin Berne

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GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017

Bringing back a holiday classic By David Dixon Various Christmas-themed shows and musicals are returning to San Diego County this year. The Old Globe Theatre’s “How the Grinch Stole Christmas,” Cygnet Theatre’s version of “A Christmas Carol” and Lamb’s Players Theatre’s presentation of “An American Christmas” will continue to provide annual holiday entertainment. Also returning is San Diego Musical Theatre’s encore run of the 2016 premiere, “Miracle on 34th Street: A Live Musical Radio Play.” Given the unanimously positive reactions from critics and audiences, it’s no wonder the story is back at the Horton Grand Theatre. With the exception of a new director, local resident Brian Rickel, and several fresh cast members, the staging will be similar to the 2016 family event. Just as in the 1947 classic movie and the Lux Radio Hour Theatre broadcast interpretation, the tale is about a man, Kris Kringle,

Bankers Hill resident Jon Lorenz is the music director, composer and arranger for the show. who is given the chance to play Santa Claus at the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade. After he starts working at the department store, Kris begins to tell others that he really is Saint Nick. One of his main goals is to persuade Macy’s special events director Doris Walker (Janaya

Jones) and her daughter Susan (Cassidy Smith) that he is an honest man. Once again, the stars portray fictitious players of radio station KSDMT. Don’t worry if this might sound confusing. Lance Arthur Smith’s adaptation never gets overly complicated. Capturing the musical styles of the 1940s is Bankers Hill resident Jon Lorenz. He is the music director, composer and arranger for the tale. While several well-known tunes are referenced, many of the melodies are original. Some of Lorenz’s influences in creating the tunes are Rodgers and Hart, Mickey Rooney and Judy Garland films, popular 1930s and 1940s standards, and harmony singing. “Our piece is set in the late ’40s, so the creative team decided that everything before then is fair game,” he said. Lux Radio’s version is a popular retelling of the narrative. However, it isn’t the only notable version that was produced after the release of the motion picture. A Hollywood remake, TV adaptations and a Meredith Willson musical called “Here’s Love” all came out after the movie box office hit premiered in theaters. There are several different reasons as to why the story continues to be a highly regarded classic. What leaves an emotional impact on Lorenz is the empathetic optimism of the evening. “The original screenplay plays into a part of humanity that wants to believe in the best of people,” he said. “There’s something about this time of year that feels like a new beginning and a chance to start over.” After the original engagement closed, the script was published by Steele Spring Stage Rights. It is exciting that Smith’s take on the narrative will begin playing at Bridge House Theatre in London from Nov. 27 to Dec. 23. San Diegans who missed the uplifting experience last year won’t have to wait long to enjoy the fresh take on the Christmas-themed comedy-drama. If you’ve never heard a radio show before, KSDMT will leave a strong first impression.

‘Miracle on 34th Street: A Live Musical Radio Play’ San Diego Musical Theatre Nov. 24 through Dec. 24 Thursdays through Sundays Also Wednesday, Dec. 20 Horton Grand Theatre 444 Fourth Ave. (Downtown) 858-560-5740

—A fan of film and theater from a very young age, David Dixon has written reviews and features for various print and online publications. You can reach him at daviddixon0202▼


Office/Residential | Free Wardrobes





Returns to San Diego for a Strictly Limited Holiday Engagement

DECEMBER 20, 2017 - JANUARY 7, 2018 ON THE LYCEUM STAGE 619.544.1000 | SDREP.ORG | Lyceum Theatre | Horton Plaza

The cast of “Miracle on 34th Street: A Live Musical Radio Play” (Photos courtesy of San Diego Musical Theatre)


GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017


A feast for the eyes and ears ‘SUMMER: The Donna Summer Musical’ Theater Review Jean Lowerison Hold onto your hat — La Jolla Playhouse has a wild ride for you. “SUMMER: The Donna Summer Musical” is both visual feast and musical extravaganza — and a show that could only have been directed by Des McAnuff. The disco queen of the world’s story is told in a nearly two-hour one-act song and talk fest that is clearly aimed at a Broadway audience. It will be a shock if this show doesn’t end up there. LaDonna Adrian Gaines was born in Boston on Dec. 31, 1948, began singing in church, decided on a music career young, and ended up owning the disco sound of the 1970s, writing her own music and recording 14 Top-10 singles. No one-trick (or one musical-style) pony, she also won five Grammys (for dance music, R&B, rock and gospel), and reportedly sold over 140 million records worldwide. She also pioneered electronic dance music (EDM) with the pulsed sound of “I Feel Love.” And she performed at the 2009 ceremony in Oslo, Norway when Barack Obama received his Nobel Peace Prize. She died in Naples, Florida on May 17, 2012. La Jolla Playhouse has pulled out all the technical and electronic stops for this show, which sports multiple traps to bring singers to the stage from underground; lots of projections, no fewer than three cars onstage, blinding lights, and some spectacular tech work to end the show that I’ll leave you to discover. The show opens with a light on a record turntable. When the arm drops the needle, the stage comes alive with androgynous women singing “The Queen is Back.” There’s movement, and smoke, and then a dissolve to Diva Donna (LaChanze), resplendent in a

bright blue sparkly long dress. The concert has turned into a one-woman show; but not for long. Three Donnas at various stages — pint-sized Duckling Donna (Storm Lever), Disco Donna (Ariana DeBose) and LaChanze’s Diva Donna — will tell (and show, and sing) you her remarkable story. The young diva-to-be wasted no time in pursuing her dream. She dropped out of school (without mentioning it to her parents) and took the bus to New York, where she was cast for a production of “Hair” — in Munich, Germany. There she met and married Austrian actor Helmuth Sommer. She gave birth to her daughter Mimi in 1973. The marriage didn’t last, but she changed the spelling and kept his last name. “SUMMER” doesn’t shy away from the less-than-lovely aspects of her life, like sexual abuse by the pastor of her church and being knocked around physically by a “boyfriend” named Gunther. Nor from the unfortunate comment she made about gays, who made up a large percentage of her audience. But this show, fascinating as it is about her life, is about the music, and McAnuff has found three spectacular

‘SUMMER: The Donna Summer Musical’ Through Dec. 24 Tuesdays and Wednesdays, 7:30 p.m. Thursdays and Fridays, 8 p.m. Saturdays at 2 and 8 p.m. Sundays at 2 and 7 p.m. La Jolla Playhouse 2910 La Jolla Village Drive (on the UCSD campus) Tickets: 858-550-1010 or

women who really do sound like Summer.Every one of them has the purity of tone, the flawless pitch and the credible delivery that Summer had. If you remember those good old disco days (or even if you don’t), “SUMMER” is a great evening of pop music — you’ll hear some 25 songs — with an interesting story to tell. Get your tickets now. —Jean Lowerison is a long-standing member of the San Diego Theatre Critics Circle and can be reached at▼

(above) A scene from "SUMMER: The Donna Summer Muscial," now at La Jolla Playhouse through Dec. 24; (below) the three Donnas sing together. (Photo by Kevin Berne)

events @THECENTER Tuesday, Dec. 5

Community Food Bank ankk 9-10:30 am, The Center er

#2MILLION The Center has been given the chance to raise #2Million for Our Center – and we’ve got until Dec. 31st to do it. Thanks to an extremely generous matching opportunity, every Center donation during our endof-year fundraising campaign will be matched at a 4:1 ratio, up to $2 million. This means your Center contributions have a greater impact than ever before. Because of this 4-to-1 match, your $20 gift becomes a $100 gift. Your $100 donation becomes a $500 donation, and so on. Please help us raise #2Million for Our Center by donating today at Thank you!

Tuesdays, Nov. 28 & Dec. 12

Free Legal Clinic 9:30-11:30 am, The Center The Access to Law Initiative, a project of California Western School Law, holds chool of Law legal clinics the second and fourth Tuesday of each month at The Center. At these clinics, attorneys will be available for free, 30-minute consultations to help evaluate legal issues. No appointment is necessary. For more information, call 619.692.2077. The San Diego LGBT Community Center 3909 Centre Street • 619-692-2077

LaChanze as "Diva Donna" in La Jolla Playhouse's "SUMMER: The Donna Summer Musical" (Photo by Kevin Berne)

Twitter: @LGBTCenter

The San Diego LGBT Community Center hosts a distribution site once a month for the Community Cares Project of the San Diego Food Bank. On the first Tuesday of every month, visit The Center’s parking lot for emergency food. For more information, visit the San Diego Food Bank website at

Saturday, Dec. 16

Hillcrest Wind Ensemble Holiday Revue 7 pm, Parq West Event Center Join the Hillcrest Wind Ensemble for a festive night of cheer at the newly remodeled Parq West Event Center, formerly the San Diego Woman’s Club (2557 3rd Ave). Under the direction of John Winkelman, the ensemble will take a nostalgic look at the holidays featuring swing arrangements of Christmas classics interspersed with a couple of non-Christmas big band medleys, including a salute to Benny Goodman. Once again the Hillcrest Holiday Singers will be a special delight. Homemade baked goods and coffee will be available during intermission. Tickets are $25 and can be purchased at The Windsmith (3875 Granada Ave), at or at the door. For more information, call 619.692.2077 x814 or visit



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GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017


Red Ribbon Ale: tributes and tutus Morgan M. Hurley | Editor

I asked him a few questions about it.

Christopher Daigneau is known to many who frequent 1. What got you involved Hillcrest Brewing Company as as an assistant brewmaster the guy with the bright blue — or and when did that additionbright green — hair and matchal role start? ing beard. While this definitely I got a call in early July from gets people’s attention, there’s our head brewer Shaver, asking a lot more to this Albuquerque, if I would be interested in helping New Mexico native than just his him out for a bit. At first, it was colorful headscape. only going to be a temporary Daigneau, who first made thing, but as a few weeks went by San Diego his home in 2010, I realized how much I was enjoyhas been a server with HBC ing it and the offer to continue to since it opened in June 2012 train was handed to me. I’ve been and has hosted the brewery’s learning since that day. weekly and wildly popular Trivia Night for the last four 2. What’s your favorite years (he also hosts “Smarty beer at HBC? Pants Saturday” at Gossip Grill I’m a hop-head at heart so from noon–2 p.m.). my favorite beers are the Just Knowing he wanted to the Hop IPA or the Hopsucker work within MO’s Universe IIPA, but after brewing it, I shortly after he arrived, have to say I’m really looking Daigneau “jumped at the forward to our Long and Stout. chance” when HBC came along and feels “lucky” to 3. HBC has done a spehave been chosen. cial, limited-release beer As if he didn’t have enough every year for World AIDS on his plate already, the exuDay — originally in memberant New England Patriots ory of former brewmaster fan (is that a requirement to Austin Copeland’s dad, who work at HBC?) took on yet andied of AIDS complications other role at the brewery earlier — I understand you got to this year: assistant brewmaster. help determine that beer As such, Daigneau recently this year, since he left the had a hand in brewing a beer company recently. Will the that has a very special connecRed Ribbon Ale now honor tion to many in the community. someone else?

World AIDS Day events

I think that this Red Ribbon, as always, honors all people that have lost the fight to HIV/ AIDS. Many of our owners lived through the scares of the ’80s and ’90s and recognize the importance of educating and remembering that period in history. 4. Tell us about this year’s brew. Red Ribbon Ale is a limited-edition beer that we brew and release every year on World AIDS Day and even though it has the same name each year, the style changes each time. This year, Shaver wanted to get flavors that we’ve never used before, so we put in some specialty malts, including rye, to bring something brand new to the table (or bar). There was a single, seven-barrel batch of it brewed, so we’re looking at a very limited quantity. 5. Where can people get Red Ribbon Ale? You can find it at the brewery at our release party on Dec. 1 and at all MO’s Universe locations starting that day, too. 6. Each year HBC also chooses a beneficiary for the release; what organization(s) will benefit this year? This year, we’re donating to the San Diego HIV Funding

R Ribbon Ale Red l launch party

(David Jester, oil on wood) (Davi

A different artist is commissioned i i d every year to create the annual Truax Award. This award was presented in 2014. (Facebook)

29th annual Dr. Brad Truax Awards

The Dr. A. Brad Truax Awards were created to honor the memory of Dr. Truax and his contributions to the HIV/ AIDS efforts in San Diego and those who have continued to carry the torch in the struggle against the HIV/AIDS epidemic in our community. Truax Awards are given in three categories: HIV education, prevention and/or counseling and testing; HIV care, treatment and/or support services; and HIV planning, advocacy and/or policy development. Each nominee is acknowledged as a community award recipient. Light refreshments will be served and there will be an art exhibition on display. 3:30–5 p.m. San Diego LGBT Community Center, 3909 Centre St., Hillcrest. bit. ly/2iDCp8k.

Enjoy an art show, charity E event and AIDS education experience, all in one place. Local cinematographer and artist David Jester has been working on a series of oil-on-wood paintings, inspired by the world of social media, that he wants to share with the local LGBT community on World AIDS Day. He is generously offering 20 percent of sales to benefit the San Diego LGBT Community Center’s HIV services programs. “The paintings are large oils of guys in pools,” Jester said in a promotion for the event. “I painted guys in pools when I was in school, and now I’ve returned to the subject after 20 years. Pools are metaphor-rich, and I enjoy painting the male figure so what’s not to like? “Lately I’ve been seeing the phrase in the dating apps, ‘Are you clean?’ It begged the question for me, ‘What is dirty?’ I started by painting water, most of which you have already seen if we are friends,” Jester continued. “The water paintings evolved into the current series.”

Collaborative. We work very closely with the San Diego Red Dress Party and love the concept of the party. As a nod to both of those organizations, we’ll be in red tutus during the launch party. The Red Ribbon Ale launch party will take place Friday, Dec. 1, at Hillcrest Brewing Company, from 3–11 p.m. Anyone who arrives at the launch party in a red tutu will get a free HBC logo beer glass. HBC will donate $2 from every Red Ribbon Ale purchased during the month of December to the San Diego HIV Funding Collaborative. Hillcrest Brewing Company, the only LGBT-owned brewery

5–10 p.m. Brick Bar, 1475 University Ave., Hillcrest. bit. ly/2mPg6RO.

A selection from David Jester’s ter’s pool series. Jester will present the eentire series to benefit HIV services serv programs on Dec. 1.

Art a and education and ben benefit exhibition

Christopher Daigneau; server, trivia host and now assistant brewer at Hillcrest Brewing Company (Facebook)

The “Tree of Life” will be on di ddisplay splay at Village Hillcrest the entire month of December. Personalized ornaments are available. (Courtesy Mama’s Kitchen)

Tree of Life ceremony

Each year Metropolitan Community Church (MCC), the San Diego Gay Men’s Chorus, Mama’s Kitchen and Village Hillcrest join together to commemorate World AIDS Day by recognizing and remembering those affected by AIDS, as well as the ongoing leadership efforts made to end the epidemic. It is an evening of special memories, a candle-lighting ceremony to honor those affected by AIDS, and a special performance by the San Diego Gay Men’s Chorus at approximately 7:45 p.m. You may honor a loved one with a personalized ornament on the tree for a $15, or two for $25. The ornaments will hang on the Tree of Life throughout the month of December. To purchase an ornament, visit 6–8 p.m. Village Hillcrest, 3959 Fifth Ave., Hillcrest. bit. ly/2zWu6hQ.

Hillcrest Brewing C Company will have a launch p party for its limited-edition R Red Ribbon Ale, brewed specially to commemorate World AIDS Day. Check our story on this elsewhere in this issue. Wear a red tutu to the party and get a special HBC logo glass. $2 from each Red Ribbon Ale sold in the month of December will go to HIV Funding Collaborative. 6–10 p.m. Hillcrest Brewing Company, 1458 University Ave., Hillcrest.

in the world, is located at 1458 University Ave. in Hillcrest, just steps from the Hillcrest Pride Flag monument. For more information, visit

Notes on Red Ribbon Ale 2017

This year’s style runs smooth and creamy with caramel, bread and hints of rye-flavored notes throughout. The Red Ribbon is brewed with Amarillo and Mosaic hops, helping create a fruity yet slightly herbal aroma. —Reach Morgan M. Hurley at▼

that are marginalized within the broader black communities nationwide, including queer and trans people.” The film will open Dec. 1 in NYC and screen in San Diego on Dec. 2 at the Digital Gym in North Park. It is free to attend. This collaboration with V Visual AIDS will be supplemented by an ongoing art exhibition at The Studio Door, called “Postcards from the Edge,” with proceeds being evenly split between Visual AIDS, the making the film screening happen and the San Diego HIV Funding Collaborative. This is the 20th anniversary year of “Postcards from the Edge” in New York City. Some of the postcards created locally will also be on display at the theater venue. 6:30 p.m. Digital Gym, 2921 El Cajon Blvd., North Park. bit. ly/2AlnV7O.▼

Day With(out) Art project

Patric Stillman, founder of The Studio Door in North Park, is collaborating with local oral ganizations to present Visual AIDS’ “Day With(out) Art,” exry hibition, which launches every orld year in New York City on World AIDS Day, to San Diego. e Also participating are the Digital Gym, POZabilities, FilmOut San Diego, San Diego Human Dignity Foundation, the Archive Project, Media Arts Center San Diego, the Escondido Art Project and others. This year’s focus is a provocative documentary, “Alternate Endings, Radical Beginnings,” which “seeks to highlight the voices of those

A selection from San Diego’s “Postcards from the Edge” exhibition. The Visual AIDS exhibition in NYC is celebrating its 20th anniversary. (Courtesy The Studio Door)


GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017

Friday, Nov. 24

San Diego Drag Kings: Work off that Thanksgiving meal with the San Diego Drag Kings. The kings will take the stage with their fabulous legs, while their regular queens bring the breasts. Doors open 7:30 p.m., show at 8 p.m., Gossip Grill, 1220 University Ave., Hillcrest. bit. ly/2j9TyGn. education, support and advocacy. $7 donation or bring an unwrapped toy to make a child smile this Christmas. Live entertainment, raffle and an auction. 3–7 p.m. Redwing Bar and Grill, 4012 30th St., North Park. bit. ly/2zmrJFw.

Monday, Nov. 27

holiday tunes, as well as a few non-denominational pop favorites, to help you make the yuletide even gayer. Fasten the seat belts in your sleighs because this ain’t your mamma’s church choir concert. (Mistletoe sold separately) 8–9:30 p.m. Martinis Above Fourth Table + Stage, 3940 Fourth Ave., second floor, Hillcrest. bit. ly/2hDsK0S.

Friday, Dec. 1

Barbie Z’s Doll House — bearded lady edition: It’s “no shave November” and we are showing our support by bringing you the bearded queen edition. Hosted by Barbie Z, with Vanity Jones, KC Blasingamen, Celeste W. Starr and Jaeda Reign ready to entertain you. Sponsored by Hillcrest Social. No cover. 8–11 p.m. #1 Fifth Avenue, 3845 Fifth Ave., Hillcrest.

Saturday, Nov. 25

#MeToo March: Nov. 25 is International Day for the Elimination of Violence Against Women, in remembrance of the three Mirabal sisters, brutally assassinated in 1960 for their political activism in the Dominican Republic. Come march in solidarity for all who have been assaulted, verbally, physically or sexually. The time has arrived to increase awareness to the depth of this problem. 10 a.m.–2 p.m. San Diego Civic Center Plaza, 1200 Third Ave., Downtown. bit. ly/2j91Uhw.

‘Star Wars’ Trivia: The staff at Urban MO’s celebrates their love for “Star Wars” and the upcoming release of “The Last Jedi,” with a trivia night dedicated to the sci-fi classic. Pre-register your team online at Landa Plenty will host the monthly trivia. 7–9 p.m. MO’s Bar and Grill, 308 University Ave., Hillcrest. bit. ly/2hITjBz.

Tuesday, Nov. 28

Women coming out group: 6:30-8 p.m. North County LGBTQ Resource Center, 3220 Mission Ave., Suite 2, Oceanside. bit. ly/2hFSlWO.

Wednesday, Nov. 29

Men’s HIV-positive support group: A support group for men who are HIV-positive to discuss feelings about disclosure of HIV status, health care and medication use, sex, substance use, isolation and community-building, dating and relationships. 6-7 p.m. North County LGBTQ Resource Center, 3220 Mission Ave., Suite 2, Oceanside. bit. ly/2hFSlWO.

Thursday, Nov. 30

Sunday, Nov. 26

Deck the Halls: Imperial Court de San Diego’s Christmas show benefits Christie’s Place, a nonprofit social service organization in San Diego County that provides HIV/AIDS

December Nights: Entertainment for the family; festive holiday lighting throughout Balboa Park, delicious cuisine and holiday cheer are all part of this classic and elaborate long-standing San Diego celebration. Food from around the globe at the International Christmas Festival at the House of Pacific Relations Cottages; unique gift shopping at museum stores and with the artisans of Spanish Village; complimentary admission to museums from 5–9 p.m.; and musical and dance presentations from the San Diego Junior Theatre, San Diego Civic Youth Ballet, San Diego Gay Men’s Chorus, Del Cerro Baptist’s Christmas Story Tree and more. 3-11 p.m. in Balboa Park, 1549 El Prado. Home network basics: If you would like to learn how your WiFi works, how to configure the equipment your service provider installed, then this class is for you. Staff will cover basic computer network configurations, Wi-Fi setup on devices, and basic router/modem configurations. All ages and skill sets. To sign up, contact Hector Roman at hroman@thecentersd. org or 619-692-2077, ext. 111. 10 a.m. David Bohnett Cyber Center, The Center, 3909 Centre St., Hillcrest. Deck the Halls of Stepping Stone: Hosted by the Stepping Stone Alumni Association, trim a tree, build a snowman,

Courtney Act in ‘Lump of Coal’: The “Diva from Down Under” has wrapped up all your favorite

string some lights, and turn Stepping Stone into a magical winter wonderland. 5–9 p.m. Stepping Stone, 3767 Central Ave., City Heights. Come ‘out’ and socialize: San Diego Out Entrepreneurs and Allies announce their new social gathering at Uptown Tavern in collaboration with LGBT Financial Resources. Meet other LGBT entrepreneurs, allies and potential investors in the local community and enjoy a cocktail or two during happy hour. Raffle. Free for anyone who RSVPs with Eventbrite, donation at door is optional. Proceeds from raffle will be used to host future workshops for LGBT entrepreneurs. 5:30–7:30 p.m. Uptown Tavern, 1236 University Ave., Hillcrest. DIVAS welcome Delta Work: It’s producer Scott Parman’s birthday and the annual “blankets and socks” drive for shelters and the homeless, with Landa Plenty as host. 7–10 p.m., Rich’s San Diego, 1051 University Ave., Hillcrest. bit. ly/2AX1uC6. Note: For more events on Dec. 1, see page 21, World AIDS Day.

Saturday, Dec. 2

Pride in Toyland Parade: Grab the kids, the neighbors, friends and the whole family, and come down to the North Park neighborhood for San Diego Pride’s tradition of ensuring LGBT families are represented in the North Park Toyland Parade. Participants will meet at 10 a.m. and walk together in the parade, which kicks off at 11 a.m. Afterward, everyone is invited for pizza at the San Diego Pride offices. Partnering organizations include the San Diego LGBT Community Center, Families at The Center, San Diego Ambassadors of The Trevor Project, PFLAG – San Diego County,

Pride’s She Fest and San Diego LGBT Pride Military Contingent. 10 a.m.–1 p.m. Keep an eye out for the meet-up location. bit. ly/2AhwRv0.

Bear Night anniversary party: Bear Night San Diego celebrates 10 years. Resident DJ Jon Williams, go-go boys, Flaco’s grilled-to-order burgers on the patio. $10 cover. 9 p.m.–2 a.m. The Merrow, 1271 University Ave., Hillcrest. bit. ly/2B90Nqn. SDGMC’s Jingle Bus cruise to Sycuan Casino: The biggest show of the year for the San Diego Gay Men’s Chorus, “Jingle,” is even more fun when you take the Jingle Bus cruise to Sycuan Casino. Tickets are $25 — the cheapest way to go (includes Jingle ticket, row 12/13 center for the 6:30 p.m. show plus travel via Sycuan Casino shuttle service). Meet at MO’s at 4 p.m. for specialty cocktails made just for the Jingle crew. Bus leaves at 5 p.m. After the one-hour concert, you’ll have time to dine and play before the 9 p.m. departure from Sycuan. You’ll arrive back at MO’s before 10 p.m., just in time for all the Saturday night fun. The venue is open to people 21 and older. Already have your Sycuan tickets and just want to ride with us? Click on the free ticket to reserve your space on the Jingle Bus Cruise. 4–9:30 p.m. MO’s Bar and Grill, 308 University Ave., Hillcrest. bit. ly/2zm7b09.

Sunday, Dec. 3

Cinderella: Rodgers and Hammerstein’s “Cinderella,” the Tony Award-winning Broadway musical

Nicky Awards: The 42nd annual Nicky Awards feature your favorite personalities and businesses at what has been called the LGBT equivalent of the Academy Awards. Live entertainment, tons of award recipients and more. This year you can also buy advance tickets that include two food options for your table. Must be pre-ordered. 7–10 p.m. Courtyard by Marriott San Diego Airport, 2592 Laning Road, Liberty Station. Huggy Bear 2018: Raise money and sell hugs for charity; the most money wins the title of Huggy Bear 2018. All proceeds benefit Special Delivery’s holiday teddy bear drive. You can also sell hugs before the event and bring the money you raise with you. Open to all. 4 p.m. The Hole in the Wall, 2830 Lytton St., Point Loma. For more information, contact or visit

Monday, Dec. 4

Charity Wreath Auction: Martinis and The Center get together every year for this fun event that supports the Queen Eddie Conlon LGBT Youth Fund. Bid on some of the most amazing

see Calendar, pg 23


solution on page 20


ACROSS 1 Anderson Cooper's area 5 Streisand’s “Prince of ___” 10 The goods 14 Highest elected homophobe’s office shape 15 ___ fours (doggy-style) 16 Sir’s counterpart 17 Q to a Scrabble player 18 Morgan Fairchild’s “Roseanne” character 19 Top or bottom of the world 20 She plays Ray in “3 Generations” 23 ISP option 24 Had lots of partners, with “out” 25 “Tales of the City,” for example 27 Cole Porter song from “Paris” 32 Unload loads 33 Stud site 34 Muster out 36 Marlon Brando’s hometown 39 Persian Gulf land 41 Sarandon, who plays Ray’s grandmother

that’s delighting audiences with its contemporary take on the classic tale, returns to San Diego. Featuring an incredible orchestra, jaw-dropping transformations and all the moments you love. There’s the pumpkin, the glass slipper, the masked ball and more — plus some surprising new twists. Be transported back to your childhood as you rediscover some of Rodgers and Hammerstein’s most beloved songs. It’s a hilarious and romantic Broadway experience for anyone who’s ever had a wish, a dream ... or a really great pair of shoes. All ages. 6 p.m. Broadway San Diego, 3666 Fourth Ave., Downtown. bit. ly/2AgktLE.

43 Series terminal 44 Caligula’s year 46 Fish dish 48 Part of a chorus line? 49 Prick 51 Margaret Cho show 53 Sexually ambiguous “Twilight” star Stewart 56 She played Gabrielle on “Desperate Housewives” 57 Flicked one’s Bic 58 Like Ray, in “3 Generations” 64 One-time Arthur Ashe rival Nastase 66 Warwick’s “___ Little Prayer for You” 67 Gulp of medicine 68 Broadway light 69 Fran Drescher show, with “The” 70 Enjoy Capote 71 Drag role for John Travolta 72 Sticks 73 Label on a lemon that isn’t a fruit

1 One on Bernstein’s staff? 2 Like McKellen’s Magneto 3 Place for a Rivera mural 4 Emulates hibernating bears 5 Fannie Flagg had some fried green ones 6 “I knew ___ instant …" 7 Disney’s “That ___ Cat!” 8 Fashion designer Perry 9 Points of view 10 Shakespeare’s Puck, e.g. 11 She plays Ray’s mother 12 “F” on a test 13 Black pussy cats, e.g. 21 Elmer who hunts wabbits 22 Opening of Hell? 26 “Julius Caesar” setting 27 Carrie in “Star Wars” 28 Draw some interest 29 Make the change that is the subject of “3 Generations” 30 Radio jock Don 31 Puccini work

35 Candy purchases 37 Part of an espionage name 38 Ruck of “Spin City” 40 Testy response, or testicles 42 Bouquets for homophiles? 45 Lauer, who cross-dressed as Dolly Parton on “Today” 47 1993 title role for 53-Down 50 Strait man 52 Author Scoppettone 53 “De-Lovely” star Kevin 54 Rubbed the wrong way 55 Like orifices close to each other 59 Half of Mork’s good-bye 60 New Year’s song ender 61 Lesbian couples in “Bambi”? 62 Morales of “Mi Familia” 63 Cincinnati team 65 Old Spanish queen



wreaths you’ve ever seen, donated by people and businesses within our community. 6–9 p.m. Martinis Above Fourth Table + Stage, 3940 Fourth Ave., second floor, Hillcrest. bit. ly/2ja8QuG.

Tuesday, Dec. 5

YPC holiday party and ugly sweater contest: Now a YPC tradition around the holidays, the first Tuesday of December is for ugly sweaters. Dig them out of your closets, browse the Hillcrest thrift stores, or build your own, but wear them to this event. It’s also Taco Tuesday at Babycakes and happy hour runs until 8 p.m. 6:30– 8 p.m. Babycakes San Diego, 3766 Fifth Ave., Hillcrest.

Wednesday, Dec. 6

G4G San Diego serves holiday cheer at the USO: Holiday helpers are needed to assist USO San Diego at their Santa Store by helping children pick out gifts; and serving meals to the men, women and families of our military. Four-hour shifts available but come any time and they will put you to work. Metered parking available until 8 p.m., free after. All are welcome. Invite your friends and family. 4–8 p.m. USO San Diego, 303 A St., Suite 100, Downtown. RSVP to More info at GGG game and trivia night: With hundreds of board games to choose from, and John Lockhart hosting the team trivia game, pizza and drinks, there’s a lot to do and see at GGG. A $5 donation is requested to keep supporting men’s programming. 6-8:30 p.m. San Diego LGBT Community Center, 3909 Centre St., Hillcrest.

Steve Grand in ‘AllAmerican Boy’: Steve Grand returns to MA4 in “All-American Boy” – up close and personal – performing your favorites and new songs from his forthcoming album. He has a unique ability to

connect with his audience through song and through the banter between them. Sometimes silly, but always a pro performer, no two Steve Grand shows are alike. 8 p.m. (Second performance Thursday at 9:30 p.m.) Martinis Above Fourth Table + Stage, 3940 Fourth Ave., Hillcrest. bit. ly/2hEjSIh.

Thursday, Dec. 7

The Flicker holiday food drive: Help out those in need this season and get free drinks for doing so. Bring 10 canned or non-perishable goods and get a free drink. Limit one per donation. Music by DJ John Joseph, go-go boys, and a night for a good cause. 9 p.m.–2 a.m. Flicks, 1017 University Ave. Hillcrest. Misfit Toy Drive and Show: Bring a new, unwrapped toy to donate to the Imperial Court de San Diego’s annual toy drive. In return, they have a full lineup of entertainment including Coco Channel, Jolene LaSalle, Derriel Carter, Roya Tribal Bellydance, Donald Vella, Princess Royale 2017 Cheryl Lynn Crouch, Carol Lindsay and Tamanava Eden-McLintock. There will be auction baskets, raffle prizes, and plenty of holiday cheer. $7 donation or bring an unwrapped toy. Gossip Grill, 1220 University Ave. Hillcrest. 6–9 p.m.

Bar AIDS: Visit participating bars, coffee shops, nightclubs and juice or smoothie bars and support HIV services in San Diego. Each location will donate 25 percent or more of its day’s beverage receipts to the San Diego HIV Collaborative, which will then grant out the money to other organizations. Last year’s participants included Rich’s San Diego; Numb3rs (now closed); Babycakes; The Merrow; Rakitori; Pecs; The Hole In The Wall; and Pardon My French. Keep an eye on the website to see who will be participating this year. Businesses and ambassadors (volunteers) still needed. Visit —Want to get something in our calendar? Email

MICHAEL KIMMEL Psychotherapist Author of "Life Beyond Therapy" in Gay San Diego 5100 Marlborough Drive San Diego CA 92116 (619)955-3311

GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017




GAY SAN DIEGO Nov. 24 – Dec. 7, 2017



The Hillcrest Wind Ensemble performs a “Holiday Revue” on Saturday, Dec. 16, at 7 p.m. at the newly remodeled Parq West Event Center, formally the San Diego Woman's Club, 2557 Third Ave. in Bankers Hill. Under the direction of John Winkelman, the 45-piece ensemble will take a nostalgic

look at the holidays, featuring swing arrangements of Christmas classics interspersed with some non-Christmas big-band medleys, including a salute to Benny Goodman. The Hillcrest Holiday Singers will join the ensemble for a special performance. Homemade holiday baked goods and coffee will be available during intermission. Tickets are $25 and can be purchased at The Windsmith, 3875 Granada Ave. in North Park, or at and at the door.

The Hillcrest Wind Ensemble is a program of the San Diego LGBT Community Center. In its 31st year, it acts as a musical ambassador to the community. For more information, call 619-692-2077 x814 or visit


Charles Dickens’ holiday classic, “A Christmas Carol,” will be staged by Welk Resort Theatre, located at the historic Welk Resort in Escondido. Directed by Larry Raben, choreography by Karl Warden and musical direction by Justin Gray, the Welk’s production of “A Christmas Carol” runs through 2017. From the theater: “Oscarwinning composer Alan Menken (“Beauty and the Beast,” “The Little Mermaid”) breathes new life into the moving tale of Ebenezer Scrooge, an irascible, cold-hearted grump who despises all things Christmas — that is, until he’s visited by three ghosts one fateful Christmas Eve. Watch as Scrooge, forced to face his

selfish ways, finds the true meaning of love and gratitude. An enduring family classic.” This will be the last production before the Welk Theatre closes temporarily for an extensive remodeling. It plans to reopen next fall with more live musical performances. “A Christmas Carol” runs through Dec. 31. Performances are Thursdays and Saturdays, 1 and 8 p.m. and Wednesdays and Sundays at 1 p.m. Tickets $59. Add a pre-show meal for $21. Contact box office at 888-8027469 or visit▼

Gay San Diego 11-24-17  
Gay San Diego 11-24-17