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Volume 7 Issue 16

Augu st 14th

Aug. 5 - 18, 2016


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A ‘full-circle moment’

3 NEWS (l to r) Shaun Flak and James Bork experience Stand Down from different sides


(Photo by Morgan M. Hurley)

A 'Love Goddess' and an LGBT fan


DADT a distant memory for veterans at Stand Down

across the country, with nearly 150 organizations and up to 2,500 volunteers working to make each event happen. This was the first year that both LGBT veterans participated and By Morgan M. Hurley openly LGBT homeless veterans were provided services in San Diego. Stand Down, a three-day Local promoter and LGBT event sponsored by Veterans veteran Shaun Flak was there, repVillage of San Diego to provide resenting VVSD, and assisting the comprehensive, much-needed homeless veterans any way he could. services to local homeless veter“This has been a great exans, took place July 21 – 24, at perience for me,” Flak said. the upper athletic field of San “Being there for other veterans, Diego High School Downtown. especially LGBT veterans, has Homeless attendees can find a been life changing.” safe place to sleep, eat hot meals, The Los Angeles LGBT Center have medical and dental issues was also on hand thanks to a addressed, pick up clothing of grant that provides outreach to all kinds, get a shower, haircuts, LGBT veterans, as was The San massages, chiropractic care and Diego LGBT Community Center. also receive assistance with job South Dakota native James and housing opportunities. Bork, an LGBT veteran who First launched in San Diego served in Yokosuka, Japan while in 1988, Stand Down now in the US Navy, had recently takes place annually in cities arrived in San Diego after “an

The Archives show their Pride



Hiking Hillcrest’s Himalayas

Timely topic


FilmOut presents ‘Fair Haven,’ outlining the dangers of conversion therapy Ken Williams | Contributing Editor

The improvisation of Second City

Index Opinion


News Briefs






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The harmful results of “pray the gay away” therapy are explored with great sensitivity and exquisite performances in “Fair Haven,” a new movie being presented Aug. 10 by FilmOut San Diego. Jack Bryant’s screenplay serves up meaty roles for

actors Tom Wopat (“The Dukes of Hazzard”) and Michael Grant (“The Secret Life of the American Teenager”), as a father and his son who clash when the teenager falls in love with another boy. Kerstin Karlhuber deftly jumps from directing short films to making her first fulllength feature. She is blessed with an outstanding cast that includes Gregory Harrison (“Trapper John, M.D.”) and his daughter, Lily Anne Harrison (“Two Guys One Truck”). All three will attend the screening at the Landmark Hillcrest Cinemas and participate in a Q&A session with the audience after the film. Even in 2016, the controversial issue of reparative (aka conversion) therapy remains in the headlines. Psychologists and other medical experts have

evening of drinking with friends.” Then a friend committed suicide. “It really brought me down to a lower level than I’ve ever been,” Bork said. “I’ve been tired of leaning on people. I was told about Stand Down and VVSD and told to experience it and apply for services.” While there, Bork applied for a spot at VVSD — a place to live while he rehabilitates and gets back on his feet — which by the end of the weekend, had been approve, but it was connecting with other LGBT and homeless veterans that was the highlight of his weekend. “Meeting other people like me and knowing that I am not alone,” he said. In a future issue we will explore VVSD and their outreach to LGBT veterans. For more information about Stand Down or VVSD, visit —Morgan M. Hurley can be reached at ▼

Local author publishes LGBT coming-of-age novel By Dave Fidlin As he reflects on his childhood aspirations and scrolls through the trials and triumphs of some of his adult experiences, Tim Parks is gleeful for reaching a milestone that has been more than four decades in the making. Last month, Parks’ first book, a coming-of-age novel titled, “The Scheme of Things,” officially hit bookstores. The main character in the thriller, Henry Dodge, has a secret that he initially goes to great lengths to hide as the story unfolds. Dodge, like Parks, is gay, which is the overarching secret that provides for a number of plot twists throughout the book’s 28 chapters. Though Parks adamantly considers “The Scheme of Things” a work of fiction, he is quick to point out about 80 percent of the book is at least loosely based on his own life.

see Novel, pg 17

(l to r) Michael Grant and Tom Wopat, who play a father and son dealing with an attempt at conversion therapy, on set of “Fair Haven” (Facebook) long condemned the practice as junk science, and indeed some states including California have outlawed the therapy as detrimental to the health of the child. Yet in mid-July, at the Republican National Convention in Cleveland, Ohio,

the Republican Party approved a harshly anti-LGBT platform that, among other things, supports a parent’s right to send their LGBT children to “conversion” therapy.

see Fair Haven, pg 2



GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 5 - 18, 2016


Father vs. gay son

Wopat plays Richard, a widower and loner who is dealing with his own demons and is emotionally unavailable to his “The issue is incredibly person. He runs the family’s apple sonal to Jack,” Karlhuber said orchard in a small town in about her screenwriter. “As a Vermont, but has little connecyoung gay man growing up in tion to the big world outside his Kentucky, he had two different little bubble. friends sent to reparative therGrant plays his son, James, apy and the results were deva promising pianist who has astating. He certainly pulled been accepted to a prestigious from his own life experiences college to study music. The to write ‘Fair Haven.’ movie opens as James returns “To me, as a straight ally, home after spending time it is incredibly important to with Dr. Gallagher (Gregory me that the LGBT commuHarrison) undergoing a faithnity (including many friends based conversion therapy proand several family members) gram claiming that it can turn celebrate the same rights him straight. and equal treatment that I Wopat and Grant said they do as a straight person,” she had to do research about concontinued. version therapy. It’s also deeply personal for “I was kind of naïve going Karlhuber and her family. into it,” Wopat said. “Fairly recently, my family Grant surfed the internet to suffered the tragedy of my learn more. cousin’s suicide,” she said. “I was largely unaware of “She was a loving and generous conversion therapy before I transgender woman whose started prepping my role for mission in life was to promote ‘Fair Haven.’ All the research I love and acceptance for all. did came from watching videos She was one of the biggest online of people’s accounts who supporters of ‘Fair Haven’ and had experienced this practice,” was fiercely proud of my advoGrant said. “While this was cacy. The unjust treatment she an unpleasant part of my prep, suffered absolutely enrages me. it was very informative in my If ‘Fair Haven’ touches just choices as I tried to bring as one young person dealing with much truth to the role as I possimilar treatment, if it gives sibly could.” them a shred of hope, then I He said he was eager to take have reached my goal.” on the role of James. Karlhuber and Bryant “I was very attracted first poured their heart and soul and foremost to the script for into the film, and it shows ‘Fair Haven.’ The opportuthrough the compelling plot nity to play a character who as well as the outstanding was going through such an performances. emotional and trying time in

Building a character


Director Kerstin Karlhuber (left) on set of "Fair Haven" ( his life was very appealing to me as an actor,” he said. “Additionally, many of the interactions and relationships explored in the story were all areas I hadn’t explored in my work on fi lm. I was excited when I got the opportunity to live out this person’s life in such a touching script.” Wopat had nothing but praise for working with Grant, who is now 20 years old. “We bonded pretty well,” Wopat said of Grant. “I kind of took Michael and Josh under my wing on the set. Michael is a good actor, very thoughtful. He explored some things with me — things that weren’t in the script — and I just went with it.” Wopat described a key scene, early in the movie, in which dad and son have an angry and explosive moment in the teen’s bedroom. Standing in the doorway, the dad tells his son that he had spent his son’s college

money to pay for the conversion therapy. What followed next was extemporaneous, Wopat said. “He said to me: ‘Fuck you! You don’t care! That’s my money!’ For a moment, I didn’t know how to respond to Michael. My instinct was to go through that bedroom door at the end of the confrontation. I didn’t know what to do. I just said: ‘I love you.’ “That back and forth set the tone for the movie on our very first day of shooting,” Wopat said. Grant certainly wasn’t intimidated working opposite a veteran actor like Wopat. “Tom Wopat was so phenomenal to work with,” Grant said. “His presence and experience on set were so amazing and I learned a great deal from working with him. We both had many scenes where we would play off each other and try different things in the moment, and Tom never failed to surprise and move me in our work together.”

Wopat said he based his gruff character after people he knew as a kid in rural Wisconsin. “I grew up in the Midwest in the 1950s and 1960s,” he said. “I know these people upside down. They are tough. Independent. Intelligent. But ultimately they are fair.” Wopat said he grew up in a place where everybody was Caucasian and he did not know any LGBT people. In those days, most LGBT people lived in the closet. So, Wopat said, he modeled his character after the Midwestern men from his youth. “I can’t really identify [with having a gay son] … it is foreign to me … at the same time, I can try to understand,” Wopat said of how he developed his character. Karlhuber said Wopat, despite his star status, auditioned for the role. “Our wonderful casting director, Judy Henderson, brought him in. I was told he wouldn’t read, he would just meet me,” Karlhuber said. “So he came in, we talked and I expected that to be it. But he had actually prepared two scenes for us! He said, ‘Are we gonna read or what?’ And then he blew me away. He came in dressed as a farmer, his inflection naturally rustic. It was the first time I saw Richard fully realized.” The director said Wopat brought “a lot to the role” and was sensitive to his character’s actions, wanting to make sure they aligned with decisions he made later in the film. “He changed a few lines here and there, always with the purpose of keeping Richard authentic,” she said.

Family tensions

The script takes an honest looks at the awkward and strained relationship that is often a common refrain between many parents and their gay children, which adds an extra layer of drama to the movie. Karlhuber explained how the fi lmmakers avoided making the father a “cookie-cutter” bad guy. “Richard always came from a place of love, hidden way deep down inside. He thinks he’s doing what’s best for James and in his own confused way he is trying to help,” she said. “As he admits at one point in the film, ‘I have no idea what to do.’ He is trying to connect with James, even if he’s forcing James to be a little more like him to make the connection easier,” Karlhuber said. “I don’t want to give away any spoilers, but it has a lot to do with the decisions he makes in the end of the film. If he were a cookie-cutter villain, the film could never believably take the journey it does and Tom Wopat had a lot to do with that. As layered and nuanced as Richard was written, he took it to the next level. He understood the arc of this character like no one else and nurtured that through every scene.” Karlhuber is also impressed with the work of her two actors who play the young gay lovers. They had great chemistry on screen.

see FilmOut, pg 19


GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 5 - 18, 2016

Meet the ‘Love Goddess’ Fifth annual ‘Reunion Party’ to benefit local LGBT seniors By Margie M. Palmer In a day and age where marriage equality is the law of the land, “don’t ask, don’t tell” has been repealed and the military’s ban on transgender service members has also been lifted, it can be hard to wrap one’s head around the idea that a large number of LGBT seniors are still fearful of discrimination. Not only is this population at a higher risk for a lack of access to healthcare, basic needs, and discrimination at the hands of healthcare and social Janelle Hickey (center) of SDHDF, is flanked by LGBT senior activists Robert service providers, they are also Bettinger and William Kelly at last year’s event. (Courtesy SDHDF) at a higher risk of abuse and neglect by healthcare providers and family members. and because of that, they are has committed to giving a minThese harsh truths are a less likely to trust or access imum of $25,000 to the Senior driving force behind the planresources because of their life Resource Center. “If we’re able ning of the San Diego Human experiences.” to surpass that goal based on Dignity Foundation’s (SDHDF) A key component of mainfunds raised from the Reunion Fifth Annual Reunion Party. taining mental and physical Party, great.” Brown said that the SDHDF “Reunion on the Bay,” as it is heath involves having a healthy expects to surpass this year’s called, will take place Saturday, and active social life, Brown fundraising goals due to great Aug. 6, from 6 p.m. to 10 p.m. on said, because without that, sesponsorships and because “Judy the Bay View Lawn at the Sheraton niors are more apt to become is such a wonderful draw.” San Diego Hotel and Marina near depressed, are less likely to Tenuta — an actress, comedithe San Diego Airport. stay active and are more likely an and accordionist — said she’s The event will feature a to have other health concerns. always been supportive of the silent auction, opportunity “Our seniors are more likeLGBTQ community because the drawing, full-hosted premium ly to go to The Center if they community has always been supbar, gourmet food and live need something, which is why portive of her. entertainment, including an it’s important to keep a viable “Even when I first started out onstage performance by special support center there,” he said. in Chicago in the late 1970s and guest star actress and comedi“That’s their go-to place.” early 1980s, I was performing at an, Judy Tenuta. The Center’s Senior a club called Hers and they told Proceeds from the event will Services program provides an me I needed to start performing benefit SDHDF’s Aging with inclusive community for LGBT at the gay club,” Tenuta said. “I Dignity Initiative and The seniors ranging from ages 50 love the LGBT community, I love San Diego LGBT Community to 90 years old; their 50 and human beings and I think that Center’s Senior Services proBetter Together program is everyone should have equal rights. gram. More than $83,000 has geared toward creating a safe “I’m looking forward to the been raised for LGBT senior space where those 50 and older event because everyone is welservices in San Diego County are able to access important recome and I want everyone who since the event’s inception. sources and referrals regarding wants to come out and celebrate “This is a generation that health care, social services and such a worthy cause to attend,” experienced unbelievable community activities. she said. discrimination,” said SDHDF “The Center has so much The entertainer is known for Executive Director John Brown. they are doing [for seniors] that her “brash” onstage persona and “It used to be that if you were being able to rely on a solid cominsult-style of comedy. A congay you couldn’t get a cosmetol- mitment of funds for a program temporary of comedians such as ogy license or be a teacher. It’s allows them to have one less Steven Wright and Sam Kinison, a generation that was forced thing to worry about,” Brown Tenuta has toured with the late into the closet for decades said, adding that the SDHDF George Carlin, is a self-proclaimed “Love Goddess” and has produced comedy specials for HBO, Showtime and Lifetime. Her 1999 comedy CD, “Attention Butt Pirates and Lesbertarians,” gave Tenuta her first Grammy nomination. The fifth annual Reunion Party will take place on Saturday, Aug. 6 from 6 p.m. – 10 p.m. and will be held on the Bay View Lawn at the Sheraton San Diego Hotel and Marina, located at 1380 Harbor Island Drive, on Harbor Island. Tickets are still available for purchase at for $135. Day-of tickets are available for $150. For more information on the event, visit To learn more about Tenuta, visit —Editor Morgan M. Hurley contributed to this report.

Judy Tenuta brings her bawdy stage presence to the event. (Courtesy SDHDF)

—Margie M. Palmer is a San Diego-based freelance writer who has been racking up bylines in a myriad of news publications for the past 10 years. You can write to her at▼


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GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 5 - 18, 2016


Pride, presentations and outreach Out of the Archives Archives Staff This year, Pride was especially meaningful: poignant in many ways, yet joyful. We were honored by San Diego Pride when Jen LaBarbera, our head archivist, was asked to give the opening speech at the Spirit of Stonewall rally, Friday night. Jen delivered a very brief history of Pride and its origins, starting with the riots led by drag queens Marcia P. Johnson and Sylvia Rivera. Both of

these individuals later completed their transitions, showing once again that they were forerunners in our community. Speaking of trans, board president Maureen Steiner attended Trans Pride on Friday afternoon. What a surprise to see so many booths and supporters at what started out a few years ago as simply a picnic in the park. Maureen was especially pleased to see organizations “outside the usual suspects;” including Big Brothers, Big Sisters, for one. On Saturday, we all enjoyed participating with the San Diego Human Dignity Foundation and its big blue

Seal Tours amphibious vehicle in the parade. Thanks, SDHDF for allowing us to join you for the second year in a row. At the festival itself, it was good seeing so many people stop by our booth in the new Rainbow Zone. Thanks to Pride and to our board, staff and volunteers who staffed the booth to share information about the Archives. If you would like a copy of our latest newsletter — and aren’t on either our email or postal mailing list — get in touch at and we’d be happy to send you a copy. You are also welcome to stop by the Archives to say hi and grab a free copy. And you’ll want to

(l to r) Mel Merrill, David Ramos, Chuck Kaminski, Jen LaBarbera, Tomas Negron and Chrissy Renee Jones (Photo by Walt Meyer) be on our mailing list for the bigname events the Archives have in store for the rest of the year, including Trolley Barn Park’s last in its free concert series, Friday, Aug. 5, from 6 – 8 p.m. Office manager Walt Meyer presented two walking tours of Hillcrest’s LGBTQ history during Pride week and Councilmember Todd Gloria and some of his staff joined us for our June tour. “Lambda Archives’ Hillcrest Historic Walking Tour provides a unique opportunity to learn about the rich and storied history of San Diego’s LGBT community,” Gloria said afterward. “As the longtime home to many of San Diego’s oldest LGBT bars and organizations, it was remarkable to reflect on the historic significance these locations played in our journey towards equality and inclusion.” Visit our Facebook page or TicketLeap to get your tickets and see why Gloria, historian Lillian Faderman (author of “The Gay Revolution”), and Bruce Coons, executive director of Save Our Heritage Organisation, have been so impressed with the tour. The next tour is scheduled for Saturday, Aug. 20 at 9:30 am. Please let us know if you have any special needs so we can adapt the tour or make a special date in the future that will work for you. Many of you know that the state of California has finally announced that it will include LGBT curriculum in K-12 schools. We are very proud of the work we have done with San Diego Unified School District to help advance compliance with the FAIR Act. We will continue our outreach to San Diego’s communities and working with local schools, GSAs and others to increase their knowledge of LGBTQ history. As stated above, we also work hand-in-hand with Pride and we will continue our collaboration with San Diego State. An intern from SDSU recently began the process of taking high-quality photos of the T-shirts in our collection and those images can be shared with the world, further expanding our reach. This fall, Jen will be giving a presentation at UCLA about community archives. Walt, on a recent trip east, visited one of the largest sexuality archives in the world at Cornell University. He toured the facility and discussed sharing some of the history Lambda Archives has collected. He also visited the small,

burgeoning LGBTQ archives in the gay community center of Pittsburgh. At different times, both Jen and Walt visited the One Archive at the USC. We look forward to working with that institution in the future to increase the scope of LGBTQ history in Southern California. Here at home, our digital archives specialist, Ken Selnick, has uploaded 60 oral histories to a server at UC Berkeley, in conjunction with our agreement with the California Audio-Visual Preservation Project. Special thanks to board member Steve Wroblewski for conducting so many of those priceless interviews. Though Steve is stepping down from the board for personal reasons, he plans to continue the interviews and is especially interested in rounding out the list of early Lambda Archives founders and members. Meantime, Ken is also almost done getting all of our historical photos out of the albums, which are actually bad for photo preservation. The plastic leaches chemicals into the pictures, as does any paper that is not acid-free and any glues and gums used to hold the photos in place are also damaging to the photos. Although we have a long way to go in fully cataloging and digitizing the photos, just getting them into preservation sleeves and acid-free boxes does wonders for their longevity. Maybe by now you are thinking, “Hey, I could do good and have fun at the same time.” Yes, you can join us at events like Pride, summer concerts, walking tours, and other outreach events. You can even come into the Archives (a summer “Cool Zone”) and assist with processing photos and collections or give an interview to Steve. Of course, if you want to simply become a member, go to Visit us during any open hours at 4545 Park Blvd., in University Heights (the Diversionary Theatre building) or any time at lambdaarchives. org, on Facebook, via email at, or 619260-1522. Remember, “Lambda Archives is the cool place to be!” —Lambda Archives, a 501(c)(3) dedicated to collecting, preserving and teaching the history of the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people in San Diego and the Northern Baja California region, is located at 4545 Park Blvd., in University Heights. To learn more, stop in or visit their website at ▼


We have finally moved, but what a ride! North County Update Max Disposti It was just a year ago when in this column we first announced our move. Since then we have dueled with construction, scheduling, permits, money (lack of) and all of the fun stuff that makes moving something that you want to run away from. Well, now it’s really done and the results are here for everyone to see. We moved a mile away from our original location in a space that is double the size (2,500 square feet), half the rent and it was designed and built the way we wanted. It was a Community Development Block Grant

The imposter syndrome Life Beyond Therapy Michael Kimmel When you were a little kid, didn’t you look at all the hard-working grownups all around you and think, “Wow, they’re so good. I hope I can be like them some day.” And then, as an adult, you look around you and think, “Wow, we’re all just faking it. None of us are really that good.” This is called “the imposter syndrome.” As adults, we are so full of self-doubt that we wonder if we really know what we are doing. Even CEOs of large corporations and highly successful entrepreneurs have sat on the sofa in my office and told me, “I’m such a phony. I

(CDBG) that made this move possible, but a collaboration with the city of Oceanside helped us find the site and with the approval process. While CDBGs are federally funded, they require City Council approval to move them forward. Our application got almost unanimous approval with the exception of one — expected — “Nay” vote from Jack Feller, (now up for re-election- hint, hint). Years have passed from when the need to create community in Oceanside was faced with ostracism and the kind of indifference that resembled the silence of certain bystanders when they witnessed bullying or discrimination. The North County LGBTQ Resource Center is now on the map, not only when you Google it but also for the political presence

Last month, I shared with you the story of my fi rst realization of San Diego Pride — or the fact that this thing called Pride existed anywhere — in 1996 at the age of 16. Well, it turns out that 1996 was a year of all sorts of discoveries for me. It was also the year I discovered AIDS Walk San Diego — and started seriously getting scared. You see, I had engaged in oral sex for the fi rst time in my life several months earlier and it freaked me out. Growing up in suburban San Diego, I was lucky enough to be exposed to safe-sex and HIV/AIDS education, but because the virus was not yet


own home and colleges — is also whom we serve. Sexual orientation and gender identity in this context of human rights cannot fully represent who we are, but it certainly reflects that complexity and the contradiction of the world we live in. LGBT Centers should aim to become the centers of this new reality, where leadership for a better tomorrow are created, forged and launched from within. From “The little Center that could” we expect even more: We want to be a place where everyone can find refuge, acceptance, and safety, but also where they can cultivate the same strength and courage that we all saw and experienced in the days post-Orlando. —Max Disposti is a human rights activist, a community organizer and the founder and executive director of the North County LGBTQ Resource Center. He can be reached at ▼

really don’t know what I’m doimposters. It’s basically all set ing and I’m terrified that, one up for straight white men to of these days, everyone will dis- get all the prizes and win all cover it and I’ll be fired.” the awards. For us to get in The brilliant and talentthere and get a piece of the pie ed Tina Fey once admitted: is awfully difficult; this encour“The beauty of the imposter ages us to feel inferior to those syndrome is you vacillate bestraight, rich old guys who hold tween extreme egomania and most of the power and the mona complete feeling of: ‘I’m a ey. They tend to be overconfifraud! Oh God, they’re onto dent in their abilities, while the me! I’m a fraud!’ So you just rest of us are all too often untry to ride the egomania when der-confident and afraid to step it comes and enjoy it and then out, speak up and be seen. slide through the idea of fraud. So what can we do about this? Seriously, I’ve just realized that We can realize that our almost everyone is a fraud, so views of our selves and our abilI try not to feel too bad about it.” ities are distorted. Many of us Many (most?) of us feel have been told our whole lives fraudulent when we are praised that unless we live a certain for our accomplishments. way, e.g., heterosexual, midInstead of feeling worthy of dle-class, white, that we’re recognition, we feel undeservdoing it wrong. It’s not easy to ing and guilty, like someone forge your own path; you can made a mistake and it’s really believe in yourself, but when someone else who deserves the the world around you tells you praise, not us. that you’re doing it wrong, it’s I think that as LGBTers, hard to stay true to yourself. women, people of color and difWe can help each other by afferently-abled people, we are firming and praising each other. even more likely to feel like Do you praise other LGBTers?

People of other ethnicities, genders, physical and mental abilities? Or do you only praise people who do it “right,” like you do? Straight white men tend to hire and mentor other straight white men. This is human nature; we’re more comfortable with people who look like us and act like us. For a clear example of this, look at the movie industry. All those straight white guys help each other get jobs and directing or writing gigs, while women, people of color and LGBTers make up a fraction of the people deciding what movies will get made and who will get paid to make/direct/ write/produce/star in them. We can learn something from the straight white men who overestimate their talents and abilities. We can give ourselves credit for what we’ve done (not ascribe it to “luck” or “good timing”) and start to talk each other up. It’s often easier to promote a friend than to promote yourself.

As Sheryl Sandberg says in her terrific book “Lean In,” we may need to do a bit of “fake it ’til you make it.” No one knows what we feel inside. I’ve given speeches where I was so nervous that my knees were shaking, but afterwards, everyone told me how calm and relaxed I was. If they only knew! Until we really feel calm inside, we may have to focus on looking calm on the outside. Eventually, the inside and the outside will match. The imposter syndrome doesn’t go away overnight; but, we can keep going, speaking up, advocating for ourselves and our brothers and sisters until we can get in there and get a piece of the pie. And you know when we do, it will taste really, really good.

wouldn’t live to see 30. This was the real fear that HIV and AIDS put into so many of our minds. My younger brother was in the eighth grade at the time and his junior high school was forming a team to participate in the 1996 AIDS Walk San Diego. My brother and family were all so surprised when I told them I had no interest in going to the walk or supporting my brother’s team. In fact, I wanted nothing to do with it and didn’t want to hear about it. When the morning of the walk rolled around, I did get roped into driving my brother to Balboa Park to drop him off and even then he asked me if I just wanted to park and walk with his team. It’ll be fun, he assured me. I wasn’t having it. I just told him “no” and that I’d be back in a couple of hours to pick him up. Driving away from the park, I saw people in their AIDS Walk T-shirts, holding

signs and getting ready to begin this incredibly important event that not only served as a huge fundraiser for very necessary HIV/AIDS services, but so many of the walkers were also participating to remember one or many people that they had lost in the 15 years since the epidemic began. While HIV/AIDS was some big, bad, scary thing that I knew little about — except that I didn’t want to contract it and that I was at a higher risk as a gay male teenager — at the time, I didn’t grasp the pain, fear and anger so many of the people walking that day had been living with for many years. Some of them were living with HIV or AIDS and were fighting for their lives. Some were friends or family members of people who had died of AIDS. Others were just angry and fed up from years of no one helping. I, too, was scared, but too scared to even get out of my car. So my fi rst AIDS Walk

San Diego was not one where I raised lots of money, or volunteered, or led a team (all things I’ve done since), but one where I did everything possible to avoid the event. Being there would have made me face the fact that I was scared to death of this “thing” and had no one to talk to about it. And being just 16 years old, I had no idea where to go to get an HIV test, or be around others who might share the same fears. It was frightening. What I didn’t know at the time was that 1996 was the fi rst year since the epidemic began in 1981 that the number of new HIV infections went down. People were still getting very sick, but treatments were finally starting to improve, and there was some hope. Being a teenager growing up around this, I (thankfully) didn’t have to witness any of

My journey with AIDS Walk Back Out with Benny Ben Cartwright

that it represents. We increased equality, try to see if you can our programming and services offer some of your time — even and the number of people we just a few hours per week — to now employ. We received grants volunteer here at the North on human trafficking and on County Center or in San Diego. divulging education on HIV The reality of needs that are prevention, but we have also not yet met will soon overdeveloped LGBTQI competenwhelm you. cy training that we brought There is definitely much to other nonprofit organizamore to do despite the incredtions, mental health providers, ible progress of the past 10 school districts and even law years. This is because the realenforcement. ity is changing and so are the We are not the same; we people that need our Center. grew into the reality we used to The intersectionality of being dream of eight years ago. transgender and a person of Despite all of these great color and the fear of becoming a efforts, we still feel that what target permeates our daily conwe do is not enough. We have versations and the reality many lost kids to suicide, we have no of us live. Being an immigrant or a refplace for the many homeless ugee and fearing to return to a youth that knock at our door country that is persecuting you and we can’t yet fully accommodate all the poor, the hungry, because of who you are, but yet not feeling welcomed here, is the fearful, and those who are also who LGBT people are. running away from violence Those struggling with breakand discrimination. We do it, ing away from the pattern of but it is not enough. domestic violence and rape For those of you that struggle to understand the role of an — that many of our youngest women often experience in their LGBT Center post-marriage

GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 5 - 18, 2016

under control like it is today, they scared the pants back on us with the HIV talks in school. In fact, I’ll never forget the panel of HIV-positive men with full-blown AIDS that were paraded in front of the entire school during an assembly that year. They were all in their 20s and 30s, but all four of them looked like they were at least 65. I can still remember that two of the men were using a walker, one was in a wheelchair, and the other had to hold onto the back of a chair to stand up. Their message to us San Diego high school kids: Have unprotected sex and you will look like us in 10 years. Being that I had just realized I was gay around that time, I figured it was only a matter of months or years before I found out that I had HIV, and I just assumed I

—Michael Kimmel can be reached at 619-955-3311 or visit▼

see Benny, pg 8



GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 5 - 18, 2016

Letters Harvey Milk news

[Ref: “Breaking: US Navy to name ship after Harvey Milk,” online only at jv6le8g] I am so happy and proud of all the people who worked hard to have a Naval vessel named after LGBT civil rights leader Harvey Milk. I was a bit apprehensive when I first learned of the plan — mainly over supporters wanting a warship in his honor. But as I learned more of the movement and the John Lewis class of ships, I realized that this achievement would just add another mark of honor that our country has made in his name. The LGBT community nationwide has scored big with this news. As a city, we also have much to be proud of — knowing that the ship will be built right here in San Diego. A big “thank you” to Nicole MurrayRamirez, the International Court System, Stuart Milk and the Harvey Milk Foundation and all who were involved and wrote letters of support. History in the making, once again! —Eddie Rey, founder, San Diego LGBT Visitors Center, via ▼

Guest Editorial

A year later, LGBTQ couples still face financial questions By Ann Dyste My partner, Angela, and I, will marry this summer. Like most LGBTQ couples, we have become accustomed to calling one another “partner,” never thinking we’d be able to use the word “wife.” We also believed we would continue living separate financial lives, never able to take full advantage of the rights conferred on legally married couples. In the absence of the legal benefits marriage provides, LGBTQ couples like us had become accustomed to seeking out advanced estate and insurance techniques to protect their loved ones. For years, we’d taken care to make sure that no stone was unturned with our joint finances — all beneficiaries, account titling, powers of attorney and other areas — and everything was up to snuff. All those documents were also accessible — at least in the cloud — wherever we EDITOR Morgan M. Hurley (619) 961-1960 CONTRIBUTING EDITORS Ken Williams, x102 Jeff Clemetson, x119 CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Charlene Baldridge Ben Cartwright, Max Disposti, Dave Fidlin, Michael Kimmel Lambda Archives Staff Margie M. Palmer Frank Sabatini Jr.

traveled, to ensure we had a financial plan in the event of an accident, or worse, death. A great deal of that uncertainty was resolved by the Supreme Court decision regarding Obergefell v. Hodges last year. This past June 26 marked the one-year anniversary of this landmark court case that changed everything. We truly have a great deal to celebrate. Above all, LGBTQ couples can celebrate the choice to marry, and although the good news is that our pocketbooks will forever thank us, the crux of the conversation is less gay versus straight and now more about married versus unmarried. Not all couples will want to marry, even with the option now being available. Those LGBTQ couples who have tied the knot or are planning to wed in the near future should begin to understand how marriage affects their pocketbooks, as well as the implications of WEB & SOCIAL MEDIA Jen Van Tieghem, x118 COPY EDITOR Dustin Lothspeich

entering into what amounts to as a legal contract. Upon marriage, Angela and I will be recognized as spouses, with the following rights and benefits: ● Estate transfer. An estate can now be transferred to a surviving spouse unencumbered, untaxed, and in full, upon death. This may be the most important reason why marriage might make sense for LGBTQ couples. Unwed couples face the risk of steep taxation upon the death of one individual, despite the fact that beneficiaries and estate planning documents indicate full transfer of assets to the surviving partner. ● Access to Social Security spousal benefits. If I pass away, Angela can take the higher of my Social Security benefits at full retirement age (this is called the spousal benefit) or her own benefit. This is not possible for unwed couples — same-sex or otherwise. ● Tax benefits and savings. Same-sex couples can now elect to file taxes as “married filing jointly.” It is recommended that newlyweds conduct a mock tax return shortly after the ACCOUNTING Priscilla Umel-Martinez (619) 961-1962


WEB DESIGN Kim Espinoza

SALES & MARKETING DIRECTOR Mike Rosensteel (619) 961-1958

DISTRIBUTION Gay San Diego is distributed free every other Friday of the month. © 2016. All rights reserved.

ADVERTISING CONSULTANTS Andrew Bagley, x106 Sloan Gomez, x104 Lisa Hamel, x107 Lionel Talaro, x113 Todd Zukowski, x106

PUBLISHER David Mannis (619) 961-1951

wedding to ensure they aren’t paying more taxes than necessary. Then use that mock return to update your W4 forms. LGBTQ couples will continue to face uncertainty even after marriage equality officially became the law of the land. Couples, no doubt, should lead with their heart, but also do sufficient planning to determine and map out the pros and cons related to this major life stage. Angela and I still have some fi nancial preparations to make — and we’ll get there together. What’s even more important during the recent one-year anniversary of Obergefell, is that we all take time to reflect on how amazing it is that we have a true choice, the freedom to marry. —Ann Dyste is the assistant vice president for U.S. Bank Wealth Management. U.S. Bancorp and its representatives do not provide tax or legal advice. Each client’s tax and financial situation is unique. Clients should consult their tax and/or legal advisor for advice and information concerning their particular situation.▼

Ann Dyste (right) with her fiance, Angela (Courtesy Ann Dyste)

OPINIONS/LETTERS: Gay San Diego encourages letters to the editor and guest editorials. Please email either to and include your phone number and address for verification. We reserve the right to edit letters for brevity and accuracy. Letters and guest editorials do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher or staff.

SUBMISSIONS/NEWS TIPS Press releases and story ideas are welcomed. Send press releases, tips, photos or story ideas to For breaking news and investigative story ideas contact the editor by phone or email.

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Guest Editorial

The Truax House conundrum By Charles Kaminsky What do you do with a piece of property that you no longer want and you consider surplus? It has two houses on it: one occupied and one that hasn’t been used in years. The land connects to a nearby canyon and the site has some great views of the bay and could be considered prime real estate. You could probably get quite a good price on it if you sold it. There might be two options: sell it or develop it. I think there also might be a third option: give it away or donate it for some worthy community benefit. The property in question at Union and West Laurel streets in Bankers Hill is known as the Truax House and owned by the city of San Diego. For many in our LGBTQ community, and especially the survivors of the AIDS epidemic, the Truax House is considered to be a special place of significance. Almost sacred ground, if you wish. As I write this, the choice has been made: It will be sold. The City Council made their decision this week and accepted

an offer to buy the property from from Nakhshab Design & Development who has “… been an advocate for the preservation and historic designation of the Truax property …” and who, if selected as the buyer, would like to incorporate a community space that “… could be used by community members, nonprofits, etc. ...” and who would “… be looking to the LGBTQ community and the Uptown Community for assistance with a memorial within this community space.” Officially opened by city and community leaders in March 1989, the San Diego AIDS Assistance Fund-sponsored house was named after Dr. Brad Truax, an early leader in San Diego’s LGBTQ community. Dr. Truax was one of the first physicians to open a gay medical practice and who, for years, was also known for his political activism and leadership. Dr. Truax initiated and coordinated the formation of the San Diego mayor’s AIDS Task Force and was the first chair of the follow-on San Diego County Regional AIDS Task Force. Truax died of AIDS on Nov. 29, 1988. I disagreed with the original decision by the city to declare the property surplus and offer it for sale. The city was in the midst of preparing an LGBTQ Historic Context Report that would identify those spaces and places that might be of significance to our community so that sensible land use and planning decisions can be made.

GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 5 - 18, 2016

Truax House, the first AIDS hospice in the nation, is located on 2513/2515 Union St. in Bankers Hill. (Photo by Walter Meyer) Simultaneously, the city is implementing an update to the Uptown Community Plan, a specified area that includes the Truax House property. Neighbors in Maple Canyon looked at the property as a front door link back into the canyon. The San Diego AIDS Memorial Committee supported a sale in hopes that proceeds from the sale would support a permanent AIDS memorial in the city. I had hoped a decision by the city on whether to sell the property would wait until the Context Report was fi nished, thus giving both the LGBTQ

community and the Uptown community the time to develop a workable community benefit plan for the property. Meanwhile on July 28, the City’s Historical Resources Board determined that the Truax House, “… provided a sanctuary and vitally needed care to terminally ill individuals with limited resources suffering from AIDS, at a time when the AIDS epidemic was relatively new, poorly understood by the general public, and highly stigmatized …” and officially designated the Truax House as an historical resource.


At the City Council meeting this week, Councilmember Todd Gloria specifically asked the proposed buyer about his commitment and intent for the property. Soheil Nakhshab reiterated his plans to preserve and restore the Truax House, dedicate the ground floor of the Truax House as a community center, incorporate a communal courtyard space, work with the adjacent property owners to provide public access to Maple Canyon and build sustainable housing project with a portion of the housing for affordable/low income housing. Part of the City Council discussion and public comments included Gloria’s commitment to work with Mayor Faulconer to find financing and a home for a San Diego AIDS Memorial. These are lofty goals and appear to meet all the varied neighborhood, community and LGBTQ desires: preservation, memorial, community space, canyon access, affordable housing, etc. Now that the city has accepted the offer to buy the property, it will be up to all of us to monitor the proposed development as it works its way through the various city departments, though community presentations and reviews to ensure that the City and the developer keeps their words and promises. —Charles “Chuck” Kaminsky is a local LGBT historian and activist and a board member of the Lambda Archives of San Diego. ▼

events ATTHECENTER Tuesday, August 9 & 23

Wednesday, August 17

Free Legal Clinic

Bi Coming Out Group

9:30 am, The Center The Access to Law Initiative, itiative, a project of California Western School of Law, holds legal clinics the second and fourth Tuesdays of each month from 9:30am to 11:30am at The Center. At these clinics, attorneys will be available for free, 30-minute consultations to help evaluate legal issues. No appointment is required. For more information, call 619.692.2077.

Tuesday, August 16

Young Women’s Discussion Group 7:30 pm, The Center

7-8:30 pm, The Center Join The Center’s discussion group on bisexuality on the third Wednesday of every month. It’s a welcoming space to share your experiences, ask questions, discuss community issues and meet like-minded people. This group is open to all persons who are sexually and/or emotionally attracted to more than one gender. For more information, contact Aaron Heier at

Sat, August 20

Ageless Artist Art Show 3 pm, The Center

Join other young women ages 18-30 on the third Tuesday of every month to discuss academics, careers, relationships, politics, social media, pop culture, community building, activism and ways to be more involved in the LGBT community. Meet like-minded people and share your experiences as a member of the LGBT community. For more information, contact Aaron Heier at 619.692.2077 x211, or

Join us for art and more at The Center’s annual Agelesss Artist Art Show. Enjoy good company, good art and tastyy portunity refreshments, as well as opportunity drawings for a chance to win a beautiful painting by The Center’s own Ageless Artists! This is a 21+ event. For more information, contact LaRue Fields at or 619.692.2077 x205. The San Diego LGBT Community Center 3909 Centre Street • 619-692-2077

Twitter: @LGBTCenter



GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 5 - 18, 2016

effort to raise money for the family of slain SDPD police officer Jonathan DeGuzman. The custom apparel and embroidery company — which has VOLUNTEERS TO CLEAN UP three locations in San Diego, STARLIGHT BOWL but each are privately owned Save Starlight, a nonprofit — has created a screen-printed community initiative, will host T-shirt that says “Back the a cleanup event Aug. 13 at the Blue,” with an image of the abandoned Starlight Bowl openSDPD badge behind it. air amphitheater in Balboa Park. Jon Bradley, corporate The cleanup kicks off the nonprofaccounts manager for the it’s campaign to preserve and reEmbroidMe Kearny Mesa vitalize the Starlight Bowl. Their location, said the company is mission is to revive the amphithegiving away the T-shirts for ater as a viable community venue free but collecting donations to host a new generation of infor each shirt, which will clusive and varied performances then go to the DeGuzman that reflect San Diego’s creative family to cover funeral and communities and culture. other expenses. District 3 Councilmember Dozens of the T-shirts Todd Gloria will join the cleanup will be hand-delivered to from 9 a.m. — noon. local police departments “I am happy to see Save and the rest will be offered Starlight bringing the community up to members of the gentogether in this grassroots cameral public who stop in to paign to clean up the Starlight their Kearny Mesa store. Bowl,” Gloria said in a news release. Bradley said that “They have a strong passion for EmbroidMe staff hope the this historic space and I’m looking gesture not only helps the forward to rolling up my sleeves on DeGuzmans, but to also Aug. 13 to show my support.” “express community support Also, the campaign will film the for local and national law event to create a fundraising camenforcement” through dispaign video. Snacks will be provided semination of the T-shirts. for volunteers and musical accomEmbroidMe is located at paniment will enliven the bowl. For 7710 Balboa Ave., Suite 109, more information, contact info@ and open Monday through or call 619-252Friday from 9 a.m. 5 p.m., 1744 or visit and Bradley expects them to have shirts for at least a T-SHIRTS TO RAISE MONEY week. Note: Only the Kearny FOR FAMILY OF SLAIN Mesa EmbroidMe location POLICE OFFICER is involved in the fundraiser EmbroidMe, a local business and will have the shirts. based in the Kearny Mesa area see Briefs, pg 9 of San Diego, has launched an



thoughts and fears were irraout, to others who have just tional, but fear is a strange had this little voice festering thing. in their head for months. Even though I remain HIVRegardless of the results negative to this day, it’s some- of their test, it makes me so my friends die— and I can’t times still difficult for me happy to see people walking imagine what it was like for to process that. For so many out of the room armed with the people who lost friend after years, I believed I had HIV real knowledge and their friend after friend for years. — and that I was going to die anxieties drastically lessened. One current friend of mine, — and when I receive medical While HIV is not the scary who is several years older, evidence to the contrary, it’s death sentence it was just told me that almost every a surprising relief. a few years ago, so many week in the late 1980s and Now, 20 years after that people still see HIV in their early 1990s, he would hear first encounter with AIDS mind as it was in 1984 and of another friend or acquainWalk San Diego, I’m working helping them get those images out of their minds is a tance who had lost their batfull time at The Center (the great feeling. tle with AIDS. producer of what is now called With all this said, I re“I had to become numb afAIDS Walk & Run San Diego) ally hope you will consider ter awhile, or I wouldn’t have and I work very hard each supporting this year’s AIDS been able to live with the con- year to raise funds for the Walk & Run San Diego — 20 stant pain,” he once told me. event. I also lead The Center’s years after I first encounBut for a teenager who was popular and award-winning tered the event (AIDS Walk told there is this thing out #BeTheGeneration outreach was founded in 1985 by there that can kill, and seecampaign, which seeks to Susan Jester as the Walk ing first-hand all of the news educate community members for Life). So many incredible reports, movies and other imabout the many tools we have ages that depicted HIV/AIDS to prevent and treat HIV today. advances have been made in our fight against HIV and at the time, it really stuck Such great tools, in fact, AIDS but so many people with you. that we are now at a point still need your support. If As I’ve written in other where we are confident that you can give $5 or $500, evpublications before, I didn’t we can end new infections of ery bit will help! You can doget my fi rst HIV test until I the virus within a decade. nate to my AIDS Walk fundwas 25 years old — an entire I never thought I would raising efforts here tinyurl. decade after my fi rst sexual have a job that deals with com/h5me9lr. Thank you! encounter. Over that 10-year HIV issues, but I am so AIDS Walk & Run San period, the back of my mind pleased to have been given Diego is scheduled for swirled with scary thoughts this experience. I now have Saturday, Sept. 24. Whether almost every single day. I the knowledge and tools to or not you want to walk or remember getting a really help people work through the run, or just participate as a bad cold around Christmas same fears that I lived with “virtual walker” (that means in 2002 and telling myself it for so many years. you can raise money and supwould be my last Christmas I also take shifts in The port the cause but stay home alive. When my paternal Center’s HIV testing room, in bed on event day), visit grandmother was dying in providing free HIV tests to to register. 2004, I remember thinking to community members, and almyself that at least she and most everyone who walks in I wouldn’t be alone, because that room has some sort of fear, Get out with Benny San Diego Pride is now we would die together. These some at the point of freaking behind us, which means it’s almost time for Hillcrest CityFest on Sunday, Aug. 14. Some people call this event “Pride Lite,” as it has some of the same fun spirit as Pride, in a more relaxed environment. Hillcrest CityFest is produced by the Hillcrest Business Association and is one of the largest neighborhood street fairs in the city. The day includes street vendors, music, a large beer garden, games, and so much more — all with a Hillcrest flair. Plus, after it gets dark, some of our favorite local DJs take over the stage and hundreds of people dance under the Hillcrest sign — there’s nothing cooler than that! Meet me under the Hillcrest sign Aug. 14 for the best Sunday Funday of the year! Info at While there are so many other events going on this month (even August is a busy one!), I try to take it easy for a few weeks after CityFest so we can keep on “gettin’ out” the rest of the year. The holidays will be here before we know it! I hope you all have a restful end of summer, although we know the summer weathBook by Music by Lyrics by ARTHUR LAURENTS JULE STYNE STEPHEN SONDHEIM er is here to stay in San Suggested by the Memoirs of GYPSY ROSE LEE Diego until at least October, and get to fundraising for #AIDSWalkSD! JULY 14 - SEPTEMBER 4






Directed by


Music Direction by


Choreography by




—Benny Cartwright is the director of community outreach at the San Diego LGBT Community Center. He can be reached at 619-692-2077 ext. 106 or outreach@thecentersd. org. Note: Byline photo by Rob Lucas Modern Aperture Photography.▼


GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 5 - 18, 2016



Mission Federal’s ArtWalk Liberty Station is the younger, smaller sister-act of ArtWalk, held in Little Italy every spring. This year’s Liberty Station event will take place Saturday, Aug. 13 and Sunday, Aug. 14. Several interactive exhibits are also planned that will allow attendees to work with exhibitors to incorporate the interactions into their art. Artist & Craftsman Supply in Hillcrest will also be on hand, offering an interactive activity that will focus on nature. In addition, four painted butterflies will be hidden throughout the Artwalk Liberty Station venue for attendees to locate using clues and win a prize for the charity of their choice. This element will be called The Butterfly Effect and will also provide photo ops for social media. Ingram Plaza is located at the corner of Historic Decatur Road and Roosevelt Road and attendance to ArtWalk is free. Festival times are from 10 a.m. – 6 p.m. on Aug. 13, and from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. on Aug. 14. For more information about ArtWalk Liberty Station, visit

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A series of attacks on homeless people in early July have led San Diego Police on an intense search for the attacker. All four attacks â&#x20AC;&#x201D; two of them fatal, two life threatening â&#x20AC;&#x201D; were similar in nature and investigators believe they are related. San Diego Crime Stoppers and the SDPD Homicide unit are offering a $1,000 reward for assistance in identifying and locating the suspect responsible for these attacks. Locations of the existing crimes include 2700 block of Morena Boulevard; 3700 block of Greenwood Street; 2500 block of Bacon Street; and 700 block of Kettner Boulevard. All attacks occurred in the early morning hours. SDPD urges the public to report any suspicious behavior and asks the homeless population to â&#x20AC;&#x153;remain vigilant, avoid sleeping alone and to stay in open, well-lit areas.â&#x20AC;? Anyone with any information should call the homicide unit 619-531-2293, Crime Stoppers anonymous tip line 888-580-8477, or visit

DISTINCTIVE LIVING HIGHLIGHTS D'9-8!#ÂŁ'!20'89 -ÂŁÂŁ2'-+,#38,33& !8+'Â&#x2C6;TÂ&#x160;Â&#x152;Â&#x2030;;3Â&#x160;TÂ&#x17D;Â&#x17D;Â&#x152;97WÄ&#x2018;W8'9-&'2$'9 2&338c3<;&338!2!!ÂŁÂŁ&3389@9;'1 Â&#x2C6;Â&#x2021;Z$'-ÂŁ-2+9!2&*338f;3f$'-ÂŁ-2+>-2&3>9-2ÂŁ-=-2+!8'!9 <836'!20-;$,'29>-;,-'ÂŁ'!66ÂŁ-!2$'9!2&3,ÂŁ'8)?;<8'9 ħ'2&'&ÂŁ3##@!2&$32$-'8+'9'8=-$'9 '9-&'2;ÂŁ3<2+'!2&683('99-32!ÂŁ);2'999;<&-3 '@ÂŁ'99#<-ÂŁ&-2+'2;8@>-;,Â&#x2030;Â&#x2039;cÂ?=-&'3132-;38-2+ !;'&<2&'8+83<2&6!80-2+>-;, $,!8+-2+9;!ধ329!=!-ÂŁ!#ÂŁ' '9-&'2;9;38!+'

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The U.S. Navy has decided to name a Naval ship after the late LGBT civil rights activist Harvey Milk, according to a press release from the American Military Partner Association (AMPA). The release stated that a congressional notification signed by Secretary of the Navy Ray Mabus confirmed the decision, and it identified the future ship as a Military Sealift Command fleet oiler, to be named the USNS Harvey Milk, with a hull number assigned as T-AO-206.

see Briefs, pg 20

The developer/seller reserves the right to change features, amenities, and pricing without notice. The information presented herein is representative only and not intended to reflect any specific feature, amenity, unit condition or view when built.



GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 5 - 18, 2016

A u g u st 14 th



CityFest! ityfest

The Merrow's CityFest Main Stage daytime band highlights! Commentary by Dustin Lothspeich AJ FROMAN are this crazy progressive rock band that throws in a lot of psychedelic twists and turns throughout their music. Their frontwoman, Sarah Norwood, has such an incredible stage presence and literally hurls herself around the stage — they’re just a great rock band in the vein of Led Zeppelin or Yes. THE BAD Vibes play indie-rock with some psychedelic vibes and a blues/folk edge to boot; killer tunes galore and one of San Diego’s hottest bands right now. VIRI Y LOS BANDIDOS are fun – they play a spirited, unique brand of Latin-fl avored rock/pop. Their frontwoman, Viri Damayuga, has a wonderful voice and they’ll add quite a different fl avor to the event, which we can’t wait for people to hear. RIP CARSON is a throwback local singer/songwriter that recalls Roy Orbison or vintage Elvis. Great old-school, rockin’ tunes that people can boogie to.

Morgan M g M M. H Hurley l | Edit Editor Once Pride is in our rearview mirror every year, the community tends to start looking forward to CityFest, the annual street festival presented by the Hillcrest Business Association (HBA). This year’s

ill ttake k place l S d eventt will Sunday, Aug. 14, from noon – 11 p.m. Originally started 32 years ago as a way to celebrate the refurbishment of the iconic neon Hillcrest sign, CityFest has continued to “keep the party going,” and they still celebrate the sign, though in recent

d years th the neon was swapped out for LED. Taking over Fifth Avenue from the north side of University Avenue all the way down to Brookes Avenue, with various vendors spilling out

PAPER DAYS are one of the hottest up-and-coming bands in San Diego, playing a bombastic style of indie-alt rock. Their singer/guitarist, Niko Sitaras, is a natural born frontman: swagger for days. And they keep playing bigger and bigger stages like SOMA and House of Blues San Diego, while also snagging top spots at local fests like the Carlsbad Village Music Walk. And of course, THE TIGHTEN UPS were chosen because we’ve always supported Laura Jane and her crew and they’re so fun to have at an event like CityFest — everyone loves ’em! For more information, visit

see CityFest!, pg 11

Internet Speeds: How much do you really need? At its onset, Internet was relegated to dial-up connections that provided very slow speeds. Those old enough may recall the times of busy signals and interrupted connections due to shared phone lines. As technology changed, a broadband connection offered much higher speeds and uninterrupted connections. Extremely slow connections may be measured in kilobits per second (Kbps), although most speeds are now measured in megabits per second (Mbps). The higher the number of bytes you are able to download per second, the faster your connection. In order to fully understand how Internet speeds work, let’s define a few key terms: • Streaming. Content you stream is audio or video data transmitted continuously and refers to the delivery method, not the data itself. Streamed content is not saved anywhere on your device. • Downloading. When you download a file, whether it be a movie, a song or something else, the item is copied onto your device from another source. This is typically done over the Internet. • Uploading. When you upload a file, you are copying it from your device to another location, such as uploading your weekend photos to your social media accounts. Perhaps you stream, download and upload, maybe you only do one of these. There are several factors to keep in mind when determining how much Internet speed your household needs, including the number of users, the types of use (basic web browsing, media sharing, streaming content, file downloading, online gaming, video chat, cloud

storage, streaming music, etc.), frequency of use and the number of devices in your home. Keep in mind that even if you live solo, your home may have several devices connected to your home Internet, including mobile devices, TVs, gaming systems, laptops, tablets and other electronics. • 10 Mbps speeds are good for light Internet users who check email and surf the Internet a few times a week and have one standarddefinition television.

How can I be sure I have the appropriate Internet speed? Now that you have a clearer picture of Internet speeds and how much your household needs, it’s best to consult an expert. Visit and use the Cox Speed Advisor tool for a customized look at your needs or visit a Cox Solutions store today to discover the Internet speed package that’s best for you. You could save time, money and bandwidth!

• 100 Mpbs speeds are good for more advanced web browsing and watching high-definition video streaming. • 300 Mbps speeds are good for gaming, teleconferencing, ultra-high-definition streams, and a household of high end users. • Gigabit Internet speed is the next generation of broadband Internet service, delivering speed to power all your devices in the home at the same time, whether you’re using your mobile devices, video streaming, gaming or have a home office. What can you do with gigabit Internet speeds? Gigabit speeds offer Internet that is 100 times faster than the average speed in the U.S. today. With a gig, you can: • Run ALL your devices at the same time • Download an HD movie in less than 60 seconds • Download 100 songs in three seconds • Upload about 1,000 photos in about a minute

Director of Product Marketing, Ryland, is always happy to share tips on Internet speeds and so are Cox in-store representatives. Visit the Cox Solutions Store in Hillcrest today at 1220 Cleveland Ave. or call (619) 780-0800 for more information on Internet speeds.



CITYFEST in each direction of the crossstreets in between; CityFest offers attendees every style of artisan vendor; carnival rides; a kids zone; food from all over the globe; community businesses; four different artist alleys to showcase local artists; a beer garden (21+); live music all day long from noon to 8 p.m. and an all ages dance party under the Hillcrest sign starting at 8 p.m.

â&#x20AC;&#x153;In an effort to respect the current state of our drought we are swapping out our water slide and water elements for more festive carnival rides and games,â&#x20AC;? said Megan Gamwell, HBAâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s marketing and communications director. â&#x20AC;&#x153;This year we are stepping up and bringing in more of your favorite carnival games and rides down on the south end of the event.â&#x20AC;? One of the regionâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s longest-running street festivals, the popular event has also served as a de facto post-Pride celebration for the local LGBT community and anyone else

who wants to play along, which generally amounts to 150,000 attendees annually. The main stage, sponsored by The Merrow, located at the corner of University and Fifth avenues, will again be the focal point, with live music planned from noon â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 7 p.m. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We host live music five to six nights a week and most of our shows feature San Diego acts so weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve seen more local bands than you can shake a stick at,â&#x20AC;? said Dustin Lothspeich, talent buyer for The Merrow. â&#x20AC;&#x153;CityFest, to us, is ultimately about taking pride in our community and we love â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;living localâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; as they say. These are all bands we love and want other people to experience as well â&#x20AC;&#x201D; thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s why weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve tapped them for the festival.â&#x20AC;? Lothspeich further encouraged the community to get out and support local â&#x20AC;&#x153;grassrootsâ&#x20AC;? music at various venues in town. Some of the bands you will see on the main stage Aug. 12, will also be performing at The Merrow this month. So if you like what you see, head over to 1271 University Ave., for more. The DJ music will be sponsored by Richâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Nightclub in two locations: the Techniche stage, located on the south side of the festival, will have TechMyxzlplix, John Vilotti and K-Swift spinning from 1 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 6 p.m. The main stage area at University and Fifth avenues, will turn into an all ages street nightclub â&#x20AC;&#x201C; with some of Hillcrestâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s finest DJs spinning while the community dances the night away under the Hillcrest sign. K-Swift and DJ Taj will be playing sets from 8 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 11 p.m.â&#x2013;ź


Main Stage (8 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 11 p.m.) K-Swift DJ Taj

Techniche (south end)

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GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 5 - 18, 2016

Flavors from a distant land Restaurant Review Frank Sabatini Jr. Mention to someone that you went out for Nepalese cuisine, and they’ll tilt their heads in the same quizzical manner as if you told them about some fantastic Canadian meal you ate last weekend. The latter (a Canadian meal) is more difficult to define because of the country’s vast size and the numerous culinary influences that shape it. Although at Taste of the tly y Himalayas, which recently opened a third San Diegoo location in Hillcrest, the meals are easier to characterize despite trickling down from

one of the world’s highest-altitude cultures. It had been four years since I last experienced the restaurant’s sizzling tandoor meats and minty lamb-filled momo dumplings, which I enjoyed immensely at the Midway Drive location while seated under a cluster of papyrus lanterns and colorful banners fitting of a street festival in Katmandu. As I reported in this column at the time, many of the dishes are poetically accented with cardamom, cumin seeds and nutmeg powder. And if you allow, the kitchen gratifies with blistering-hot chilies,

some of them imported from Nepal. Here, the menu and décor are the same — in what was formerly Bino’s Bistro & Creperie. As I learned from each visit, Himalayan food is 75 percent similar to northern Indian cuisine, except that it uses less oil and more spices. Thick enzyme-rich yogurt, for example, dominates the Himalayan version of chicken tikka masala, along with a surge of complex curries. The same yogurt effectively fills your stomach when drinking a glass of cold mango lassi — the ultimate fruit-flecked smooththat requires requ quires strong strrong g ie that

Lamb vindaloo, front, and chicken achari, are served with rice in copper pots (Photo by Frank Sabatini Jr.)

Traditional papyrus lanterns hover over the dining room. suction when using a straw. Paper-thin lentil crackers (papadum) with mint chutney typically kick off the meals. Although they aren’t complimentary as I’ve seen in some Indian restaurants. Two large disks cost $2.95 and they left us wanting more while waiting for other dishes. An appetizer of chicken choila followed. It featured a heaping of marinated chicken cooked in a clay oven, and dressed in reddish “Himalayan sauce” that our Nepalese waiter said contains chil li chilies, ccu curry

Himalayan vegetable soup

Chicken choila piled high

(Photo by Frank Sabatini Jr.)

(Photo by Frank Sabatini Jr.)

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A BAJA WINE & CULINARY ADVENTURE Experience the new brunch•wine•bazar (bwb) Sunday series at Tres Estrellas farm in Tecate, Baja California, Mexico. The day includes: • Round trip transport to/from San Diego • Valle de Guadalupe wine tasting & hors d’oeuvres • A farm-fresh gourmet brunch • Time to relax, tour the farm and shop • Games like bocce & horseshoes

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(Photo by Frank Sabatini Jr.)

Taste of the Himalayas 1260 University Ave. (Hillcrest) 619-880-4988,

Prices: Appetizers, soups and salads, $2.95 to $9.95; entrees, $13.95 to $24.95

d and d onions. i A powder As we suspected from its ravishing flavor, he later indicated there were more ingredients in the recipe, but didn’t know the English words for them. A bowl of Himalayan vegetable soup was stocked with toasted cumin seeds and finely minced cauliflower, onions and zucchini. The broth was clean and superb, and seemingly made with only a wee touch of salt. From a heat scale of one to 10, my companion chose level two for lamb vindaloo, and I opted for level four in an entrée dominated partly by pickled fruits and vegetables, called chicken achari. (Masochists seeking off-thechart intensity in any dish can ask for “911” sauce.) The lamb pieces were amazingly tender, but tasted intensely smoky at first, almost like cigar ashes smell. As we went along, however, the tomato-onion “gravy” and scant chilies quelled the edge, or maybe we had simply acquired a taste for it. Much to my liking, the chicken (dark and white meat) flaunted a perfect, spicy burn. The pickled elements — onions, zucchini, lemon peel and mango — added a fascinating sourness exceeding that of other brined veggies and fruit peels used lately in salads and burger toppings. Without them, I would have guessed I was eating feisty Indian-style chicken curry. All three locations of Taste of the Himalayas, including another in La Jolla, are owned and staffed by Nepalese transplants. The menu features nearly 40 different dishes of national origin, more than what are listed on the website, and with certain entrees exceeding or nearing the $20 mark. But given their exotic flavors and obscurity on the local dining, you will likely leave without financial regret. —Frank Sabatini Jr. is the author of “Secret San Diego” (ECW Press), and began his local writing career more than two decades ago as a staffer for the former San Diego Tribune. You can reach him at▼


Fresh herbs from a backyard garden land in foods and beverages at Meraki Café (Courtesy El G.) The recently opened Meraki Café in University Heights is the only outlet in San Diego serving Fair Trade Equator Coffee, a coveted roast from San Rafael, California, lauded for its almond-cedar-nutmeg notes. The café’s owner, April Brandenstein, said her supplier confirmed she is the only local vendor carrying the beans since opening the business earlier this summer. Her menu also includes acai bowls, smoothies, gluten-free waffles, salads, toasted sandwiches and more. In addition, Brandenstein and her wife, Katerina Gkiourdo, tend to a backyard garden that produces herbs for the café’s house-made coffee syrups and other menu items. Meraki, which features a dog-friendly patio, replaced DeMi Café. 1735 Adams Ave., 619-269-9618,

The Octopus Restaurant Group from Los Angeles has softopened the much-anticipated H20 Sushi & Izakaya in the Hillcrest space previously occupied by D-Bar. Termed as a “Japanese gastropub,” the establishment brings to the table modern presentations of traditional Japanese cuisine served amid flashy design elements such Salmon carpaccio at the new H20 as metal curtains, blue LED lightSushi & Izakaya in Hillcrest (Courtesy ing, and a large screen projecting Octopus Restaurant Group) scenes of San Diego. The bill of fare, which includes numerous small plates, offers everything from seasonal oysters and salmon carpaccio to fried squid legs and innovative sushi rolls. Flights of aged whiskey, sake bombs, crafty cocktails and other libations comprise the drink list. Lunch and dinner are served daily, and happy hour is held from 3 to 6 p.m. seven days a week, and from 9 p.m. to closing Sunday through Thursday. 3950 Fifth Ave., 619-795-9090,

GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 5 - 18, 2016


See the Musical that has Audiences and Critics Cheering – Must Close August 14!


“An Austen-tatious Charmer! Embroidered with wit and plenty of worthy songs.” The San Diego Union-Tribune

Rumor has it that Caffe Calabria in North Park will utilize its second-level banquet room for a potential cocktail lounge on Friday and Saturday evenings. The space, which is accessible from the rear of the restaurant, has been named 33 Trentatre. It features a patio and a bar that recently returned to operation for private events as well as public wine tastings held from 6 – 9 p.m. every Wednesday. The café’s owner was not available for comment, although an employee indicated that the nightclub plans are currently being considered. 3933 30th St., 619-291-1759, Coming this fall to Harrah’s Resort Southern California in Valley Center is a Native American-owned brewery named SR76 after State Road 76, plus KJ Chinese Kitchen and a smoothie bar. The additions are part of a $14 million renovation to the resort, which will also make way for nearly two dozen “wellness-inspired” guest rooms featuring Vitamin C-infused showers, yoga mats and built-in ceiling speakers. The expansions are due for completion this fall. Harrah’s is owned by the Rincon Band of Luiseno Indians and was a major supporter of this year’s San Diego LGBT Pride weekend by sponsoring the festival’s main stage and adjoining VIP area. 777 Harrah’s Rincon Way, Valley Center, 760-751-3100,

Call it tank to plate. Denver-based chef, Jensen Cummings, is collaborating with local chef Chris Arzola of The Patio on Goldfinch in presenting a six-course dinner on Aug. 16 that will feature beers by Green Flash Brewing Company and New Belgium Brewery woven into every dish. A certified cicerone (beer sommelier), Cummings is the founder of Brewed Food, a movement that celebrates the synergy between craft beer and artisan cooking. He has presented the concept at dinners around the country in conjunction with various beer makers. The dinner will be held from 6 – 9 p.m. at The Patio in Mission Hills. Courses include tea-smoked scallops with pickled strawberries, beef tataki with wort soy, pork belly with cherry Sriracha, and more. They will be paired to beers by the glass as well. The cost is $70, plus tax. 4020 Goldfinch St., 619-501-5090, or The latest update on Pop Pie Co. is that it will debut in late August, according to Steven Torres, who is co-launching the University Heights eatery with chef Gan Suebsarakham. The space will feature communal tables, counter seating and two patio areas. Torres said it will open with several varieties of sweet and savory pies, available in three- and five-inch sizes. The menu will be augmented by craft beers, a small wine selection and a multi-roaster specialty coffee program. 4404 Park Blvd., The team at Gossip Grill is calling it a “mini foodie lift” as Chef Nicole Urman prepares to debut several new dishes on Aug. 12 that will join its existing menu of American comfort fare. “I want to breathe new life into our menu with foods that are trending now,” Urman stated in a press release, referring to tater tot nachos, jalapeno-stuffed burgers, classic lobster rolls, and more. The establishment, tailored to women who “play nice with the boys and everyone Lobster rolls and other new savories on in between,” is part of MO’s tap at Gossip Grill. (Courtesy MO’s Universe) Universe of restaurant bars. It is open daily and features a full patio bar, restaurant, dance floor and VIP lounge areas. 1220 University Ave., 619-260-8023,

Sweet and savory crepes in North Park (Courtesy Café Madeleine) Café Madeleine has branched into North Park with a second outpost that is double the size compared to its South Park location. The space features ample indoor/outdoor seating and a larger kitchen for baking quiche and pastries for both locations. Owner Christine Perez says several menu items unique to the new spot will be introduced by mid to late August. They include French baguette sandwiches, additional salads and specialty pastries. In addition, her original menu of assorted crepes is currently available. A remodel to the space resulted in a Parisian-style façade, an espresso bar, and exposed rafters and trusses that were covered up when the building last housed a Cricket Wireless store. 2850 El Cajon Blvd., 619-693-5733, —Frank Sabatini Jr can be reached at fsabatini@san. ▼

Book, Music, and Lyrics by Paul Gordon Directed by Barbara Gaines Based on the Novel by Jane Austen Presented in Association with Chicago Shakespeare Theater

(619) 23-GLOBE (234-5623) Wayne Alan Wilcox and Sharon Rietkerk. Photo by Liz Lauren, courtesy of Chicago Shakespeare Theater.


GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 5 - 18, 2016


Perfect indulgence at Playhouse audience, such as locales and “The Second City: situations. Free speech! As one may gather from this, (While Supplies Last)” the content varies from evening Directed to evening, and no two perforby Ryan Archibald mances will be identical. Tuesdays through Sunday, July 31, Second City, One sketch about “priviSundays, through Aug. 21 considered the “leading brand” lege,” for instance, selects an Mandell Weiss Forum in U.S. improv-based sketch audience member who most La Jolla Playhouse comedy, presented a troupe of represents that word. Then the 2910 La Jolla Blvd. six bright, varied talents in young man is taken backstage, Tickets begin at $29 the opening of “Free Speech a script put into his hand, and (While Supplies Last),” which he is engaged as part of the or plays in the Mandell Weiss sketch. Another exceptionally 858-550-1010 Forum through Aug. 21. funny piece concerned shopping It’s a perfect indulgence for for a pistol at a firearms bouthe election year. tique. As the numbers of shopThe major virtues of the pers increased — one group getting to know one another ideal company needed for an shopping for a child’s first gun (“Star Wars” or “Star Trek”? extended evening of irreverent — so did the violence, until the for instance, or going to Guy sketch comedy (around two carnage resembled the last act Fieri restaurants), and the hours) include a variety of of “Hamlet.” other, a hetero bar pickup pair skills and body types, an abiliOther appealing (or appalldiscussing in clinical, jaw-dropty to think fast, and the ability ing) sketches concern couples — ping detail, the mechanics of each to create and maintain one, a gay pair on a blind date of contraception vis-a-vis the a reliable persona and chemistry in various combinations. Of all the Second City troupes experienced at La Jolla Playhouse (this is the fourth), this particular group is the most compatible, differentiated and appealing. The topic, as befits the last 100 days of run-up to our November presidential election, is free speech as it applies (or not) to the process and the candidates and to the experience of the citizenry. There is a fair amount of (willing) audience participation and numerous sketches that involve Cast of Second City’s “Free Speech (While Supplies Last)” now showing at improvisation engendered La Jolla Playhouse. (Photo by Kirsten Miccoli) by invited call-outs from the

Theater Review Charlene Baldridge


Sept. 7 – Oct. 2 | San Diego Civic Theatre ©Disney | 866-870-2717 | Groups (10+): 619-564-3001

(l to r) Jeffrey Murdoch and Chucho Perez perfecting the art of incorporating their audience. No show will be the same. (Photo by Todd Rosenberg) woman’s “Ring” and the man’s growing fear that it is some kind of “dick noose.” My favorite sketch involving all six performers was a communal house meeting ending in discussion of a certain brush that some residents are using to scrub the toilet, leaving a certain residue on it, and the slow dawning on all exactly what brush is being discussed. Ludicrous situations and discussions, aren’t they? And yet, we’ve all had them or imagined having them. That’s what makes an evening with The Second City so enjoyable — they tread fearlessly and outrageously into all territory, including how to take back what you said, a la Donald Trump. This troupe, comprising tall and gangly Emily Fightmaster, short-haired imp Carley Moseley, appealing Jeffrey Murdoch, diminutive Scott

Nelson, versatile Chucho Pérez and tall, blond Julia Weiss, is one of the most musical and compatible in memory. The rather portly, mustachioed Murdoch is adept on trumpet; all sing a delightful ensemble ditty, “It’s the Saddest Thing”; and several sing solo numbers. Music Director Mary Mahoney enhances the entire show on keyboards, sometimes joining in on vocals. The Second City was founded in 1959 and currently has training facilities in Chicago, Los Angeles and Toronto. Among many, many others, from its ranks have come Tina Fey, John Belushi, Dan Ackroyd, and Stephen Colbert. — Charlene Baldridge has been writing about the arts since 1979. You can follow her blog at or reach her at▼





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NOVEL â&#x20AC;&#x153;The other 20 percent I really ramped up for the story,â&#x20AC;? said Parks, who grew up in and currently resides in San Diego. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Some of the characters are inspired by people Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve met, but all of the names have been changed, of course. Fiction provides a nice cover that way.â&#x20AC;? Like Dodge, Parks moved to Los Angeles for a period of time as he discovered his sexuality. Speaking to that chapter of his own life, Parks describes it as â&#x20AC;&#x153;a real eye-opening experience.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;It was a hard time in my life,â&#x20AC;? Parks said, pointing to some of the heartache he experienced during the period of time. â&#x20AC;&#x153;But I also wonder whatever happened to that daredevil kid. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m 47 years old now.â&#x20AC;? Parks said he is confident â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Scheme of Thingsâ&#x20AC;? will resonate with an LGBT audience, but he also believes the book has universal themes that will appeal to everyone, regardless of the personâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sexual orientation, gender identity, race or ethnicity. â&#x20AC;&#x153;This really is a book about living out your truth, which is something everyone can relate to,â&#x20AC;? Parks said. While there are plenty of twists and turns throughout the book, Parksâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; own story of publishing â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Scheme of Thingsâ&#x20AC;? is a tale onto itself. At age 5, Parks said he had a natural interest in writing â&#x20AC;&#x201D; an interest that was encouraged and nurtured by his mom,

Mary Parks. Tim pays homage to his mom on the dedication page of his book. â&#x20AC;&#x153;She was my biggest cheerleader,â&#x20AC;? Parks said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;She was always there, and she always encouraged my creativity.â&#x20AC;? Parksâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; mom has since died, which has dampened some of the excitement as the book becomes available in stores and online. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a little bittersweet,â&#x20AC;? Parks said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;But somewhere, she knows this is happening.â&#x20AC;? Parks also acknowledges the many supportive friends who have helped him through numerous speed bumps in the past dozen years, as he began in earnest to bring â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Scheme of Thingsâ&#x20AC;? to print. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I encountered a number of frustrations, but there were friends who told me to just


Rron@ro RON OS T E R OS r noste .coom noster


GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 5 - 18, 2016

keep going,â&#x20AC;? Parks said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d pour hours and days into writing, and they stood by me and encouraged me. I eventually realized if I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t do this, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d regret it. And I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t want to live with regret.â&#x20AC;? Another milestone for Parks is coming up Aug. 14. He will be signing copies of â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Scheme of Thingsâ&#x20AC;? at Warwickâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s in La Jolla as part of the retailerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Weekends with Locals series. Parks worked at the bookstore from 1995 to 2000, and throughout his years of employment there, he dreamed of one day having a book of his on the storeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s shelves. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s turned out to be a nice, full-circle moment for me,â&#x20AC;? Parks said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I have to admit it all seems a little surreal, but Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m very happy to have the opportunity.â&#x20AC;? While he pauses to bask in this special moment of his life, Parks said grander aspirations still lie on the horizon. A follow-up book is already in the works, which is fitting since â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Scheme of Thingsâ&#x20AC;? ends on a cliffhanger. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve envisioned this as a series of books,â&#x20AC;? he said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;There are other topics and issues Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d like to explore that I didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t deal with in this book. I have so much more to write.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Scheme of Things,â&#x20AC;? published by New York-based Page Publishing, is 439 pages and available at several physical stores, including Warwickâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, Barnes and Noble, and online through such outlets as Amazon, Google Play and iTunes.


Local openly-gay author, Tim Parks (Courtesy Tim Parks) Parks will be signing copies of â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Scheme of Thingsâ&#x20AC;? at Warwickâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Books, located at 7812 Grand Ave., in La Jolla, on Sunday, Aug. 14 at 2 p.m. For more details of Parksâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; writing pursuits and author credits,

visit his website, â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Dave Fidlin is a freelance journalist with a special affinity for San Diego and its people. Contact him atâ&#x2013;ź


AUGUST 11-14, 2016

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C A B A R E T 619 220-0097 4545 Park Blvd San Diego, CA 92116



GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 5 - 18, 2016


Latin Night: A dance party featuring a performance by the Manny Cepeda Orchestra Trio. $5 cover. 10 p.m. – 1 a.m. Numbers San Diego, 3811 Park Blvd., Hillcrest. Visit bit. ly/2anmt5n.

‘The Princess Bride’: A free showing of the cult classic film as part of Normal Heights summer movies in the park series. Bring a picnic, blanket, friends and family. Movies start at sundown. Adams Park, 3491 Adams Ave., Normal Heights. Visit


Gay for Good volunteer event: For this event, the volunteer group is partnering with the County of San Diego Parks Department to help mulch and weed the orchard at Los Penasquitos Adobe. The orchard supplies food for local food banks. 9 – 11:30 a.m. 12122 Canyonside Park Drive. Visit Cori Schumacher for Carlsbad City Council campaign launch: An event for Schumacher’s supporters and volunteers. 9 – 11 a.m. Visit hq45t7r to receive details on the meeting location. ‘Jerry Maguire’: Cinema Under the Stars presents the 1996 film starring Tom Cruise, Cuba Gooding Jr. and Renee Zellweger. 8 p.m. $15. Additional screening on Sunday, Aug. 7. 4040 Goldfinch St., Mission Hills. For more info, visit or call 619-295-4221. Reunion Party: Actress, entertainer and comedian Judy Tenuta will be the special guest at San Diego Human Dignity Foundation’s annual Reunion Party. The event will also feature a silent auction, drawings, hosted bar, food and more. Proceeds benefit The Center’s senior programs. Tickets $135. 6 – 10 p.m. Bay View Lawn at the Sheraton San Diego Hotel & Marina, 1380 Harbor Island Drive. Visit 10th annual backpack fundraiser: This ’80s-themed fundraiser by host Richard Aguirre will feature Jell-O shots and entertainment. Please bring backpacks and school supplies to benefit children ages 8 – 18 at Christie’s Place and the Monarch School. 6 p.m. Redwing Bar & Grill, 4012 30th St., North Park. Visit


‘Heat Black and White Pool Party’: This monthly pool party features two DJs, games, new black and white decorations, two full bars and more. Event is 18 and up. Presale tickets are $20; general admission at the door is $25. This edition will feature DJ John Joseph and DJ dirtyKurty. Noon – 5 p.m. Lafayette Hotel, 2223 El Cajon Blvd., North Park. Visit Think Red T-Dance: The hosts of the Red Dress Party San Diego will takeover Urban MO’s selling Jell-O shots (to raise funds for the San Diego Human Dignity Foundation) and tickets to the main event (Red Dress Party on Oct. 8). Music by DJ SRO and Micky’s. 2 –7 p.m. 308 University Ave., Hillcrest. Visit San Diego Women’s Chorus new member orientation: Singers of all skill levels can learn more about the chorus at this special event. 4 p.m. Mission Hills United Church of Christ, 4070 Jackdaw St. Visit bit. ly/2apS6LA.

Association’: A group of concerned citizens plan to attend the HBA’s board meeting in peaceful protest. The concern is with the HBA and Hillcrest Maintenance Assessment District’s plans to remove homeless people from the neighborhood. 5 – 8 p.m. Joyce Beers Community Center, 3900 Vermont St., Hillcrest. Visit bit. ly/2apUyS9.


GSDBA Engaging Aging Professional Affinity Group: Greater San Diego Business Association program designed to provide professional development and education for members in professions that serve the aging population. This month’s guest speaker: Kevin McAninch, CEO and founder of Age Well Care Solutions. Registration required. Noon – 1:30 p.m. Via at La Jolla Villas, 8515 Costa Verde Blvd., La Jolla. Visit Wine and Canvas: Stepby-step instruction and materials are included in this event to create 16-by20-inch gallery-wrapped canvas painting to take home. Tonight — “Colorful Elephant.” No outside food or drinks. $35 per person. 6 – 9 p.m. Fifty Seven Degrees Wine Bar, 1735 Hancock St., Mission Hills. Visit


Painting and Vino: Local professional artists instruct attendees on painting a masterpiece. Tonight – “Tulip.” 6 – 9 p.m. 21+. $45, all supplies included, registration is required. Barn Brewery, 2850 El Cajon Blvd. #3. For more info, visit


‘Save Hillcrest’s Homeless – Investigate the Hillcrest Business

‘Notting Hill’: Cinema Under the Stars presents this drama-romance starring Julia Roberts and Hugh Grant. 8 p.m. $15. Additional screening on Friday, Aug. 12. 4040 Goldfinch St., Mission Hills. For more info, visit or call 619-295-4221.


‘Tour of Scotland’: Sample and discuss rare and small batch scotches from all over Scotland at this special tasting. Food will also be provided. $35 (only 15 seats available). 6:30 – 8

p.m. Vom Fass Hillcrest, 1050 University Ave., E103. Visit hillcrest.vomfassusa. com and for tickets. Live music – Indigo Girls: The Grammy Awardwinning duo will perform at Humphreys Concerts by the Bay with special guest Lucy Wainwright Roche. $45. 7:30 p.m. 2241 Shelter Island Drive. Visit


ArtWalk @ Liberty Station: This annual twoday festival starts today featuring music, visual arts, interactive art making and more. A shaded beer and wine pavilion and street food area will be open throughout the festival. ArtWalk opens at 10 a.m. each day and wraps up at 6 p.m. on Saturday and 5 p.m. on Sunday. Arts District at Liberty Station, Ingram Plaza, 2645 Historic Decatur Road. Visit libertystation. Fifth annual HRC San Diego Gala Dinner and Auction: This annual event celebrates the strides made for LGBTQ equality across the nation, while also strengthening convictions on helping those who still experience profound injustice. The evening will start with a VIP reception at 5 p.m. followed by a silent auction and general reception at 6 p.m. and fi nally a dinner and program at 7 p.m. Hotel del Coronado, 1500 Orange Ave. Visit bit. ly/2apWgTQ.


Trashy Daddy Disco: Happy hour all night long plus throwback disco music and videos. 6 p.m. – close. Urban MO’s 308 University Ave., Hillcrest. Visit


Trivia Tuesday: Every Tuesday, come alone or with a group of friends for a chance to win valuable HBC gift cards. 7:30 – 10 p.m. Hillcrest Brewing Company, 1458 University Ave., Hillcrest. Visit or call 619-269-4323.


Wednesday wine tasting: A weekly tasting featuring various styles and winemakers. This week showcases Zilaro Cellars and celebrates the release of their 2013 red wines. Winemaker Patrick Zilaro will be on hand and there will be appetizers to enjoy with samples of his wines. $5 or complimentary with bottle purchase. Reservations required. 5:30 – 7:30 p.m. Vom Fass Hillcrest, 1050 University Ave., E103. Visit


West Street Pride 2016: A celebration in Laguna Beach featuring contests, games and more. 2 – 6 p.m. West Street Beach, 1 Camel Point Drive, Laguna Beach. Visit ‘San Diego DragggOff ’: A drag competition featuring hosts Tara Hole and Michael Kaye. There will be cash prizes, drink specials, raffles, a special guest DJ and more. Contest entry is $15; admission is $7. Doors at 4 p.m.; contest

‘Tootsie’: Cinema Under the Stars presents the 1982 film about an out-of-work actor (Dustin Hoffman) posing as a woman to land a role on a soap opera. 8 p.m. $15. Additional screening on Friday, Aug. 19. 4040 Goldfinch St., Mission Hills. For more info, visit or call 619-295-4221.

—Compiled by Jen Van Tieghem. Email calendar items to or jen@▼


solution on page 15


ACROSS 1 What guns shoot off 5 “West ___ Story” 9 Pub order 14 Be plenty hot 15 Boob, to a Brit 16 Start of a Sappho title, perhaps 17 He played an angel in “The Bishop’s Wife” 19 With 60-Across, he played the bishop in “The Bishop’s Wife” 20 Virginia Woolf’s maiden name 21 Left the cockpit in a hurry 23 Ellen DeGeneres and others 25 Sex attachment 26 Whitman’s leaves 28 1903 Gertrude Stein short story 30 Novelist Patricia ___ Warren 34 Should have said 35 Sometime poisonous plant 37 Elton’s john 38 Denomination that recently elected a female bishop with a wife 41 Elbow-bender 42 Fights for twosomes

sign up from 4 – 5 p.m.; contest 5:30 – 6:30 p.m. Numbers San Diego, 3811 Park Blvd., Hillcrest. Visit

43 Circumcision and more 44 “See ya” 46 Old nuclear power org. 47 “Our” for Ulrichs 48 Stimpy’s boyfriend, perhaps 50 German philosopher Georg 52 Got top billing on Broadway 56 Gay rodeo watering holes 60 See 19-Across 61 Like a bishop and her wife 63 Became erect 64 Annie, to Daddy Warbucks, in “Annie” 65 Von Trapp family escape route 66 Lavatory door sign 67 Mar. Madness source 68 “___ we forget”

1 Nuts and bolts 2 Ditch in some Flynn flicks 3 Muck’s partner 4 Timothy of “The Broken Hearts Club” 5 Second part of Shakespeare’s iamb 6 “All ___ is a room somewhere ...” 7 Noisy clamor 8 Novel conclusion 9 With one’s hands full 10 Prop for “I have a headache tonight ...” 11 Poli sci subj. 12 Warhol pal ___ Sedgwick 13 Sanford portrayer Foxx 18 Like some autobiographies 22 ___ Ben Hur 24 What you do when you sit on it 26 Salami that you stick in your hero 27 Bluesy Bonnie 29 911 respondents 31 Top 32 Hamilton Burger to Perry Mason, usually 33 Where they yell “Cut!”

34 Has to 35 Foe of Peter Pan 36 Ithaca school 39 New York state senator Tom 40 Like a lover who cheats 45 Recruit to sing “Jailhous Rock”? 47 Kampala’s land 49 Birds at sea 51 Former NFL player Tuaolo 52 Problem for a drag queen’s hosiery 53 Kind of jack 54 Shakespeare’s stream 55 One way to go 57 Eyeball 58 Breaks for Heather’s mommies 59 Pt. of SSS 62 D.C. lobby group


“Fair Haven” Aug. 10, 7 p.m. Landmark Hillcrest Cinemas 3965 Fifth Ave. (Hillcrest) Tickets: $10

Th l praised i d The di director also Green. “Josh Green brought comic relief both to his character and to set. The film is heavy at times and James is sorting through some tough stuff. Josh lights up the screen and audiences adore him. He has a natural charisma that shines through and is also profoundly talented. He gave his character, Charlie, weight and depth, expertly balancing out James’ turmoil where the film needs it the most. Josh is a comedian and when we were in the trenches, shooting in a whirlwind 14 days, it was nice to just laugh sometimes,” Karlhuber said. “Michael and Josh are opposites, just like James and Charlie. They are genuine together; I think you can tell why they love each other. We were tremendously lucky that they did have chemistry on screen. Josh came from New York and Michael from LA, so there were


Gay Resort Dr. | Cathedral City (760) 324-1350 | (800) 472-0836

FILMOUT “Michael seems to have this well of unlimited depth and emotion to pull from,” she said. “He was 18 when we shot and he was just the most professional and seasoned actor. He has this ability to pour emotion out of him with the tiniest eyebrow movement or subtle twitch of his mouth. Without any dialogue he says everything he needs to say.” Karlhuber said they hadn’t planned on finding an actor for the role of James who could play piano, let alone one who was a concert pianist. “When I became aware of his musical ability, we added a piano scene and changed an existing scene to include a much more difficult sonata,” she said. “Those scenes are so authentic both in his emotions and the camera work we were able to achieve because he was actually playing.”

GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 5 - 18, 2016






(l to r) Michael Grant and Josh Green play lovers in “Fair Haven.” (Facebook) never any chemistry reads between them. That also speaks to their talent; they met a day before filming together and are superbly convincing that they have years of history between them,” she said. Grant described how he approached having two “love interests” in the movie. When his character comes home from conversion therapy, he attempts to date his pastor’s daughter, played by Lily Anne Harrison, before his boyfriend comes back into his life. “Both Josh and Lily were so professional on a daily basis and a real pleasure to work with,” Grant said. “In developing the character, I relied mainly on the script. I first strove to personalize all the relationships in the story. I also worked very hard in prep to make sure my piano playing was where it would need to be when we were filming. I really focused my backstory work on the relationship my character would have had with his mother and allowed that to influence my choices in each scene.” For Wopat, the finished product was an eye-opener. “It is a beautiful movie,” he said. “I didn’t realize the main thrust of the movie was an indictment of that kind of therapy. I think it was well-written and beautifully photographed. I’m very proud of this movie.” —Ken Williams is a contributing editor of Gay San Diego and can be reached at ken@ or at 619-961-1952. He is a volunteer board member with FilmOut San Diego, serving as Film & Media Relations Director.▼




GAY SAN DIEGO Aug. 5 - 18, 2016


BRIEFS San Diego City Commissioner Nicole Murray Ramirez told Gay San Diego that Stuart Milk, Harveyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s nephew and the founder and board president of the Harvey Milk Foundation, called him from Europe to give him the news. Ramirez was in Los Angeles filming a segment for a Bravo TV show, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Then and Now,â&#x20AC;? hosted by Andy Cohen, when he got the phone call. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Oh my god we pulled it off, I just canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t believe this,â&#x20AC;? Ramirez said, still in shock over the news. Ramirez began the campaign to get a Navy ship named after the civil rights icon right here in San Diego several years ago. He enlisted the International Court Council of the Imperial Court â&#x20AC;&#x201D; which has 68 chapters across the U.S., Canada and Mexico â&#x20AC;&#x201D; to help with the campaign. â&#x20AC;&#x153;This is a military salute from America saying to every LGBT veteran or active duty member that we are proud of your service,â&#x20AC;? he said. Ramirez is also responsible for San Diegoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Harvey Milk Street â&#x20AC;&#x201D; the first public street in the nation to be named after Milk â&#x20AC;&#x201D; and was also responsible for the campaign to get Harvey Milk on a U.S. Postage stamp, which ended successfully two years ago. Harvey Milk was commissioned in the U.S. Navy in 1951 and served in San Diego as a diving officer on the submarine rescue ship, the Kittiwake. He was discharged in 1955 as a Lt. j.g. In 1977 Milk was elected to the San Francisco board of supervisors â&#x20AC;&#x201D; the first openly gay politician elected to office in California. He was assassinated along with Mayor George Moscone, by another supervisor, Dan White, a year later. Milk was wearing his Navy diver belt buckle at the time of his death. â&#x20AC;&#x153;People have never understood why I have been so military oriented,â&#x20AC;? Ramirez said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;But my father was a veteran and my brother, who was gay, was in the Navy. It instilled in me patriotism. To be proud of your country and those who serve it.â&#x20AC;? AMPA is a support and resource network for the partners, spouses, families and allies of the nationâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s LGBT service members and veterans. Ashley Broadway-Mack, AMPAâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s president, lauded the decision. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Harvey Milk is an American hero and an icon for LGBT equality, and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s phenomenal that the U.S. Navy is going to honor his legacy by naming a ship after him,â&#x20AC;? Broadway-Mack said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Harvey Milkâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s incredible leadership in the face of adversity continues to inspire all of us in our ongoing fight for full LGBT equality. By breaking down barriers and fighting for the dignity and worth of all Americans, he left behind an example for all of us in his service to our nation, both in and out of uniform.â&#x20AC;? The ship, which will be part of a series of Lewis class ships â&#x20AC;&#x201D; named after another civil rights activist, senior Congressmember John Lewis â&#x20AC;&#x201D; will be built in San Diego by General Dynamics at NAASCO. For more about the historic campaign to name a Navy ship after Harvey Milk, visit To learn more about AMPA, visitâ&#x2013;ź






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Square footage/acreage shown is only an estimate and actual square footage/acreage will differ. Buyer should rely on his or her own evaluation of useable area. Plans to build out this neighborhood as proposed are subject to change without notice. The estimated completion date of the Civita multi-level park is 2016. The date of actual completion could substantially differ from the estimated date. Prices, plans and terms are effective on the date of publication and subject to change without notice. Depictions of homes or other features are artist conceptions. Hardscape, landscape and other items shown may be decorator suggestions that are not included in the purchase price and availability may vary. CalAtlantic Group, Inc. California Real Estate License No. 01138346.

Gay san diego 08 05 16  
Gay san diego 08 05 16