Lifestyles over 50
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March 2011
Personal Growth
Dating After 50 - Online Dating by Vicki Bezems, Lifestyles over 50
In last month’s issue, we looked at the decision to date again after a long period of marriage or being single. Once you feel that you are emotionally ready to go out and meet someone new, the first step is to assess what you want out of a relationship. Then you need to find the best way to meet other singles. You may or may not have used traditional methods, like joining a special interest club, taking a class or getting introduced through friends or family members, but whether you have or not, it may be time to try online dating. No, you say, that’s not for me! You may have heard horror stories about meeting people online. However, there are also many stories with happy endings. There are advantages and disadvantages to online dating. But, as in everything else, if you educate yourself on how to go about it, online dating can be successful and rewarding. Advantages: • Online dating offers lots of choices. And it’s convenient. It’s a great way to find love and companionship without even leaving your own home. • Online dating is inexpensive. Even if you pay to join, an online dating service is still cheaper than other activities, like a senior cruise. • Online dating profiles are a fun way to learn about people. Online dating sites that allow you to write detailed personal profiles, including hobbies, special interests, political beliefs, dreams, goals and favorite activities will give you the most accurate idea of what a person is like and will help you decide if you have enough in common to make a connection. Noteworthy: The effort someone puts into writing his or her profile is indicative of the kind of effort he or she will put into interpersonal communications. • Online dating makes it easy to get to know each other. By exchanging emails with your prospective friend, you get to know each other slowly, without the awkwardness that comes with first dates. If you choose to meet, you’ll already know a lot about each other, and that could help you both feel more comfortable. Disadvantages • Online dating costs money. Many online dating sites will allow you to view other people’s profiles before joining, so you get an idea of who’s available. But they often charge to let you reply to a profile. • Pictures can lie. Photos are an important part of online
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dating profiles. Unfortunately, some people post photos that are extremely flattering and not very trueto-life or were made when they were at a much younger age. If you remind yourself that your prospective date probably doesn’t look as good as his or her photo, you won’t be disappointed. Sometimes people lie, too. Some people lie in their online dating profiles in an attempt to get more responses, or in some cases to deliberately mislead. Use your better judgment and don’t believe everything you read.
How to Get Started There are scads of online dating services available. First, read reviews and select one that matches your philosophy.
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