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October 9, 2010

Vol 1, Issue 15

(904)347-2391 Next Issue October 23

“Second - The discovery of an artesian water supply. The wells have a constant flow sufficient for every domestic and public purpose. “Third - The adoption of a concrete building materiAKE NE al, which means substantial and absolutely fire-proof buildings. Massive Hotels of Yesteryear “Fourth - The lavish expenditure of princely capital One in a series of historic features as St. Augustine prepares for in the construction of magnificent hotels for the enterits 450th Anniversary in 2015. tainment of thousands of guests.” A century ago, visitors to our nation’s oldest city While the older wooden hotels advertised “perfect found far different accommodations - enormous wood- sanitary arrangements,” and catering “to people of culen hotels long since claimed by termites and fire, and ture and refinement who appreciate quiet, comfort, and the first phases of concrete good living,” the much touted Ponce de Leon, comconstruction. pleted in 1887, with its companion Alcazar and The 1892 Standard Guide Cordova hotels, advertised simply: St. Augustine, reproduced “So much has been written about St. Augustine, today by Historic Map & Florida, with its incomparable winter climate, and of Print Co., advertised the St. the magnificent Ponce de Leon Hotel, with its every George, Magnolia, luxurious appointment, that the management feel that Barcelona, Valencia, and the simple announcement that the Ponce de Leon, Florida House - long since lost to the elements, while Alcazar and Cordova will be thrown open for the the Ponce de Leon, Alcazar, and Cordova - today’s reception of guests about the 1st day of January, 1891, Casa Monica, survived with concrete construction. will be quite sufficient.” “Four agencies have contributed to the rapid develHistoric highlights are featured in The St. Augustine Report, opment of the city as a winter resort,” the 1892 guide a free weekly e-newsletter prepared by former Mayor George noted. Gardner. To subscribe to the Report, or to order a set of 12 briefs Gardner has written on famous people and events “First - Improved transportation facilities, providing in St. Augustine’s history, (available for $12), easy access from the North. The railway time from email New York has been reduced to thirty-six hours.



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Ancient City Post


Jerry Kollar, Publisher (904) 347-2391

(Information gathered herein is from sources considered reliable. Accuracy however cannot be guaranteed. All humorous stories and jokes appearing here are intended for entertainment purposes only and are not meant to disrespect or harm any group or individuals. Ads appearing in this paper are not to be considered as an endorsement or validation by Ancient City Post for products or services offered. No advertiser is guaranteed exclusivity.)

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Downtown Saint Augustine (maps are not to scale)

Downtown Map - South

Call Today for Reservations

904-540-0031 Two Tours Nightly Tuesday thru Sunday

Calendar of Events Fall Corn Maze

Good for Dinner only

Must present coupon when ordering. Any purchase $25 or more. Limit 1 coupon per party. Expires 12/1/10 Ancient City Post


13th Annual Greek Festival

Calendar of Events

$ 5.00 OFF

Florida Cracker Cafe

5995 Brough Road, Elkton Located off SR 207 Take the entire family for a mind-boggling agricultural experience at Sykes and Cooper Farms’ 9-acre "cornfusing" maze. There is a pumpkin patch, hayrides, u-pick-um sunflowers and much more. Fri, Oct 1st thru Sun, Oct 31st Thur & Fri, 5pm0 - 9 pm; Sat, 10am - 10pm; Sun 1pm - 5pm Cost: $7 per person (under 2 is free) 904.692.1370

Francis Field , Castillo Drive, St. Augustine, FL 13th Annual Greek Festival hosted by Holy Trinity Greek Orthodox Church. Enjoy a delicious assortment of Greek foods, pastries and beverages along with nonstop entertainment performed by the Hellenic Band and traditional Greek Fri, Oct 8th, 4pm - 9pm; Sat, Oct 9th, 11am - 9pm and Sun, Oct 10th, Noon - 5pm Cost: $2 Children under 12 are free on Sun 904.829.0504

A husband and wife were fighting over something Life Insurance trivial. However, both of them adhered to their own “Do you know the present value of your husband’s positions without budging an inch, and since yelling at policy?” the life insurance salesman asked his client. each other wasn’t about to solve the problem, they “What do you mean?” countered the woman. decided they would each ask 10 friends to come, and “If you should lose your husband, what would you they would ask the 20 people to act as a jury. get?” asked the salesman. The husband got 10 of his best friends to come The woman thought a minute, then brightened up right away. and said, “Probably a poodle.” Meanwhile, the wife got all 10 of his friends’ wives. PAGE 3 Please say you saw it in the Ancient City Post



Only $799

Medium up to 3 toppings Coupon required. Expires 10/31/2010. Offer good for a limited time at participating Papa John’s restaurants only. Additional toppings extra. Not valid with any other coupons or discounts. Limited delivery area. Charges may apply. Customer responsible for all applicable taxes.

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Large up to 3 toppings 4 8 9 5 3 1

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St. Augustine Colonial Folk Arts & Crafts Festival

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Military Appreciation Day

Calendar of Events

Colonial Spanish Quarter Museum, 35 St. George Street Mark W. Lance Armory See colonial craftspeople from throughout Florida demonstrate 190 San Marco Ave, St. Augustine “Lost Arts” such as spinning, weaving, basket making, blackStrictly for military and their families. Color Guard smithing, pottery making and many other arts and crafts. Ceremonies, guest speakers, live entertainment, food, beverages, Sat, Oct 9th and Sun, Oct 10th, 10am - 5pm 904.825.8055 family games and other activities. Organizations will be present to provide information about employment, education, discounts and other beneficial resources for service members and their famThink Pink Motorcycle Ride ilies. Flagler Imaging Center Sat, Oct 9th, 2pm - 6pm Cost: Free with Military ID (required) 101 Health Park Blvd., St. Augustine, FL 2nd Annual event to raise awareness of breast cancer. This 90- mile ride escorted by the St. Johns County Sheriff’s Office and City of St. Augustine Police department (registration begins at 8 The Flaming Lips at St. Augustine Amphitheatre a.m). Following the ride at noon, there will be celebration that St. Augustine Amphitheater, 1340 A1A S., St. Augustine, FL includes raffles, vendors, kids games a health fair and more at the The psychedelic alternative rock band the Flaming Lips, perImaging Center. formance begins at 7:30 pm. Sat, Oct 9th, 8am, Fair begins at noon Cost:$20/rider Fri, Oct 15th, 7:30pm Cost:$ 29.50, $34.50 & $38.50 & $10/passenger 904.471.1965


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Fusion Po i n t

Cracker Day

St. Johns County Fairgrounds, Elkton, FL Celebrate Florida’s Country Cracker Heritage when bluegrass banjos and fiddles combine with horsemanship demonstrations and mouth-watering barbecue. Enjoy a full day of horseback games, horseback racing, barrel racing, livestock shows, cracker whipping demonstrations, and exhibits of Florida Cracker equipment. Sat, Oct 16th, 8am - 7pm Adults $10, children (under 12) $4 904.824.9720

Pellicer Creek Raid – Civil War Battle

Calendar of Events

1. A bicycle can’t stand alone because it is two-tired. 2. What’s the definition of a will? It’s a dead giveaway. 3. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. 4. She had a boyfriend with a wooden leg, but broke it off. 5. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion. 6. If you don’t pay your exorcist, you get repossessed. 7. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress. 8. When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds. 9. The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered. 10. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart. 11. He often broke into song because he couldn’t find the key. 12. A lot of money is tainted. ‘Taint yours and ‘taint mine. 13. A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat. 14. He had a photographic memory that was never developed. 15. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end. 16. When you’ve seen one shopping center, you’ve seen a mall. 17. Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine. 18. When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she’d dye. 19. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis. 20. Marathon runners with bad footwear suffer the agony of defeat.

7900 Old Kings Road 17 miles south of St. Augustine off U.S. 1 South Two battles will take place on Saturday at noon and 4 pm. One battle will take place on Sunday at 1 pm. Sixty infantry and twenty five cavalry troops will participate. Authentic camps open to visitors throughout the rest of the day. Florida’s role in wartime supply as presented by Jeff Grzelak, a historian with the Orange County Regional History Center in Orlando, will be speaking about Florida’s critical role in supplying Confederate troops with food. Sat, Oct 16th & Sun, Oct 17th Cost: $6/person 386.446.7630

Accord Civil Rights Landmarks Tour

36 Sevilla Street, Memorial Presbyterian Church St. Augustine historian David Nolan aboard the St. Augustine Sightseeing Trains for a narrated tour of the landmarks and sites where history was made during the Civil Rights movement in the 1960s. Sat, Oct 16th, 10am Cost:Adults: $15/Children $7 904.347.1382

Homework Help

Historic Property Repairs Begin

The University of Florida (UF), now managing 34 state-owned historic properties here, has begun cutting into an estimated $27 million in repairs to those properties, with $483,873 in work on eleven buildings. UF took over after ten years of management by the city with no state funding support. The university hopes to continue receiving $650,000 a year from the state, authorized this year. (From the St Augustine Report - see our ad on page 8)

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St. Augustine Highlights


“Dad,” said Little Johnny, “I’m late for football practice. Would you please do my homework for me?” The father said irately, “Son, it just wouldn’t be right.” “That’s okay,” replied Little Johnny, “but you could at least give it a try, couldn’t you?”



“YOUR FAMILY’S SOURCE FOR FUN, NEWS, FACTS & EVENTS” Visitor Center Expansion Planned

St. Augustine Highlights

Plans are developing to expand the St. Augustine/St. Johns County Visitor Information Center to a 20,000 square foot exhibition hall, climate-controlled and secure for demanding exhibits like that if Picasso’s works, anticipated in 2012. City Manager John Regan says of all the legacy projects for the commemorations, “one critical element is suitable exhibit space for demanding exhibit specifications.” The plan is to expand and enclose rear porches at the visitor center. Estimated cost is $2 million, and project time, 18 months. (From the St Augustine Report - see our ad on page 8)

Speeding Ticket

By Former Mayor George Gardner

A set of 12 briefs on famous people and events in St. Augustine history $15

More than four centuries of history in bedside booklets for quick nighttime reads for St Augustine’s 450th anniversary in 2015

Orders: 904-669-1348 57 Fullerwood Drive, St. Augustine FL 32084 Uptown Saturday Night

San Marco Ave between Ripley’s Believe It Or Not and Mission of Nombre de Dios Uptown San Marco Shopping District, St. Augustine hosts artists, book signings, live music, refreshments and other events, all contributing to the party-like atmosphere. Sat, Oct 30th, 5pm - 9pm Cost: Free 904.824.3152

Calendar of Events

A middle-aged woman was driving through a school zone when a policeman pulled her over for Wanna-be Mechanic speeding. As he was giving her the ticket, she said, A man is applying for a job as mechanic that he “How come I always get a ticket and everyone else really wants to get. gets a warning? Is it my face?” The boss says, “Can you roll your hard hat down “No, ma’am,” explained the officer, “it’s your foot.” your arm and pop it back on your head?” The mechanic nods, confused. St. Johns County Agricultural Fair “Can you play light saber with your wrench and St. Johns County Fairgrounds, 5840 State Road 207 Elkton, FL St. Johns County will celebrate its agricultural heritage at this another man’s screwdriver?” “Oh yes,” says the mechanic. annual event that promises fun for all ages. Midway rides, food, musical performance and 4-H exhibits are all part of the fun. “Can you bounce your screwdriver off the cement, Tue, Oct 19th - Sun, Oct 24th, 8am - 7pm grab it, whirl it around and put it in your belt like a Cost: Adults $10,/children $4. 904,824,9720 gun?” “Sir, I’ve been doing that for years!” says the wanna-be mechanic. Florida’s Haunted Trails “Well in that case, I can’t use you. I have 12 men At the Florida Agricultural Museum, 7900 Old Kings Road doing that already!” says the boss. 17 miles south of St. Augustine off U.S. 1 South

Gates will open at 6 pm, wagon rides along our haunted trails will begin at sunset and end at 10 pm. This year’s event will feature haunted houses, the Mugwump (Flagler County’s own mythical monster), carnival games for the kids, ghostly trails through the woods, the haunted farm, story tell- ers, face painting, headless horsemen, and the Scariest Stuff Imaginable! Fri and Sat, October 22nd, 23rd, 29th and 30th 6 pm - 11 pm Cost: $8/Person 386.446.7630

Creatures Of The Night

999 Anastasia Blvd. Trick or treating & fun at the St. Augustine Alligator Farm. Trick or treat stations. Many activities for kids and parents alike. Fri, Oct 29th - Sun, Oct 31st 5:30pm to 7:00pm Cost: Adults $8 & Children $6 904.824.3337

Ripley’s Halloween Ghost Train Adventure

19 San Marco Ave. The tour begins at Ripley’s Believe It Or Not! Museum. Our first train leaves from Ripley’s Museum at 8:00 p.m. 90 minute interactive paranormal investigation takes you inside THREE haunted buildings and visits TWO cemeteries. Fri, Oct 29th - Sun, Oct 31st Cost: Adults $26/Children $12 904.824.1606 PAGE 6 When you advertise, your ad also appears

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“YOUR FAMILY’S SOURCE FOR FUN, NEWS, FACTS & EVENTS” A Haunting Sail on the Black Raven

October 31st has been given many monickers, but no matter the festivities, you can be sure you’ll find a reason to celebrate with the pirates aboard the Black Raven! The crew of the Pirate Ship Black Raven is reaching deep into their bag of tricks (and treats!) to bring you a haunting adventure that will span across midnight and beyond. On Saturday, October 30th, we welcome aboard all ages for our Family-Friendly 6:15pm trip that will highlight the oncoming holiday. This cruise will showcase magic and mystery, giving everyone aboard a chance to be enthralled! Also on Saturday, we’ll have a riveting Adults-Only 21+ Club Cruise that sets sail at 8:15pm. Mature jokes and festive material await the brave souls who would join us for the late-night cruise. And, to finish off the evening and start October 31st with a bang, the Black Raven will be setting sail at 11:15pm with a two-hour tour that kicks off the holiday properly! What is this mysterious 11:15pm cruise entailing? You’ll have to call in and find out for yourself as we plan to surprise and mystify you with our entertainment. Interested? Call 1-877-578-5050 for tickets and details. Why only trick or treat? Why not both aboard the Pirate Ship Black Raven! ~ scribed by Kathy McCarthy

Meet Our Pirates – Jack

We have ourselves a fine crew aboard the Pirate Ship Black Raven, and we thought it only proper that you get to meet them and hear their stories. So we’ll be having a small write-up about each of our pirates, randomly drawn, for your amusement. For our 3rd article in a series of 10, we’ll introduce you to our very own wayward pirate, Jack! Hailing from some unknown reaches, Jack was one of the few pirates who didn’t go out in search of becoming a Pirate so well known. In fact, his “pirate brand” was achieved for his refusal to transport slaves for the East India Trading Company. Some in the company held a grudge, and Jack was set on his way to becoming an outlaw. Well, the rouge life fit easily for him and since then, our witty Jack has traveled the world in search of new fortunes and new dames. He’s come to the small port of St. Augustine looking for the fabled Fountain of Youth, and word has it some of his kin are here, as well. Meanwhile, he’s been residing aboard the Black Raven for security when the pirating life causes him grief. His talents? Singing, confusion and deception...and dishonesty. His weapon of choice? His sword and his pistol. His weakness? The fairer gender, of course. The Pirate Ship Black Raven welcomes him aboard, and we hope you’ll join us in our adventures with Jack!

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St. Francis House Move 3-5 Years Away


St. Augustine Highlights

A move of St. Francis House, the county’s only emergency shelter, is likely three to five years away, according to City Manager John Regan, a member of the sponsoring St. Augustine Society. The society rejected a former 43,000 square foot manufacturing plant on Dobbs Road as too expensive – even at a foreclosure cost of little over $1 million, and its bid to relocate to a former county fire/rescue station near EPIC Community Services and St. Gerard House was rejected by the county Planning and Zoning Agency.

Local news in our Nation’s Oldest City


Weekly email newsletter about city affairs and our community

Current news of our nation’s oldest city written by former two-term Mayor George Gardner, Published by the St. Augustine Department of Public Affairs

subscribe: 904-669-1348

Missed Ferry

Puzzle Solutions

This guy loved living in Staten Island, but he wasn’t crazy about the ferry. If he missed a ferry late at night, he would have to spend the next hour or so wandering the deserted streets of lower Manhattan. So, when he spotted a ferry no more than fifteen feet from the dock, he decided he wouldn’t subject (From the St Augustine Report - see our ad on page 8) himself to an hour’s wait. He made a running leap and landed on his hands and knees, a little bruised maybe, Failing Eyesight but safe on deck. An older lady was expecting a gentleman friend to He got up, brushed himself off, and announced call on her later in the day. She was nervous because proudly to a bystander, “Well, I made that one, didn’t her eyesight was failing and was afraid her friend I?” might reject her because she was less than perfect. So, “Sure did,” the bystander said. “But you should she came up with a plan to prove to him that she could have waited a minute or two. The ferry is just about to see perfectly. She put a straight pin in a tree that was dock.” about 200 feet from her front porch. When her beau arrived, they sat in the porch swing and were talking More on Speeding Tickets when she suddenly stopped the conversation and “What am I supposed to do with this?” grumbled a asked, “Is that a pin sticking in that tree?” motorist as the policeman handed him a speeding tickHer friend squinted and said, “I don’t see a thing.” et. “Well, I’m going to go see,” she said as she jumped “Keep it,” the cop said. “When you collect four of up, ran toward the tree, and collided with a cow. them, you get a bicycle.” Sudoku Puzzles Courtesy of:

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Real Estate

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For Rent


A/C & Heating Sales, service, Quality, Install, Duct Cleaning, Whole House Generators, Solar Solutions Provided RES./Com --904-819-0234 #CAC1813432 Action Heating & Air Conditioning See Our ad on Page 12

Sicilian Baby-Backs with Cocoa Nibs and Citrus Salt


1 Rack of Baby-back Ribs (Approx. 4 lbs) 1 Tablespoon The Spice & Tea Exchange Herbs de Provence Pest Control 1 Onion Diced 4395 State Road 206 W. 3 Stalks of Celery Diced This recipe has been submitted by: Elkton, FL 32033 The Spice & Tea Exchange 1 Stick of Unsalted Butter 904-692-2565 59 Hypolita Street ¼ Cup Brown Sugar Saint Augustine, Fl 32084 Stuart's Pest Control, LLC (904) 826-3770 ¼ Cup Red Wine Vinegar See Our ad on Page 1 ¼ Cup Water 1 teaspoon Smoked Hot Pimienton Irish Dance Lessons-All Ages & 1 teaspoon Sweet Pimeton Levels 904.848.4040 814.2966 1 teaspoon The Spice & Tea Exchange Unsweetened Cocoa Powder 2 Tablespoons Toasted Chopped Almonds Transportation 1 Tablespoon of The Spice & Tea Exchange Cocoa Nibs VW SERVICE BY RON 1 Tablespoon The Spice & Tea Exchange Florida 05 Nissan 350 Z Gray $9,995 98 VW Cabrio Green $3695 Sunshine 02 VW Jetta 1.8Turb Slv $3995 03 VW Jetta Red $3995 98 VW GTI VR6 Yellow $4795 99 VW Jetta Green $2795 07 VW Jetta White $9795 98 VW Cabrio Red, $3195 00 VW Jetta 1.8Tbo Whi $4495 03 VW Jetta Blue $4195 99 VW Passat 1.8T Burg $3195 01 VW Jetta 1.8 Tbo Blk $4195For more Info call Rick (386)258-7556 (Daytona Beach)

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Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.


Ancient City P ost R ecipes

To Prepare:

Place ribs in shallow pan with 1 cup water and the Herbs de Provence. Cover in foil and bake for 1 hour at 350 degrees. Remove ribs from pan. Grill the ribs over a wood fired grill for five minutes a side. Remove from grill, place in roasting pan and set aside. Place butter in sauté pan with the brown sugar, onions and celery. Sauté on medium flame for ten minutes until onions are transparent and volume is reduced by 50%. Add the hot and sweet pimienton and cocoa powder to the onion mixture in sauté pan, cook for five minutes. Add the water and vinegar and cook on medium flame until the mixture is reduced to a syrupy mixture. Remove pan from heat. Grind Florida Sunshine spice. Rub onto ribs to taste. Brush on the sauce and sprinkle on Cocoa Nibbs and toasted chopped almonds. Put ribs back into the roasting pan, cover with foil and bake for 3 hours in a pre-heated 250 degree oven. Take out, slice and serve. Have a local Saint Augustine Recipe you wish to share? Please call us at (904) 347-2391

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Visitors’s Guide

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Visitors Are Looking! Can They Find You?

Speeding Registration

On a long drive from Virginia, I thought I was traveling at a reasonable speed, but the flashing blue lights in my rear- view mirror made me realize that I’d been over the limit. I handed the officer my license and made small talk while my wife dug through the glove compartment for the registration. “I’m usually very careful about my speed,” I told him as my wife handed me the paperwork. The officer studied it and then gave it back. “Sir,” he said gruffly, “this is not your registration.” It was a warning ticket I had received for speeding in Florida. Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.

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“YOUR FAMILY’S SOURCE FOR FUN, NEWS, FACTS & EVENTS” Unwa Stuart’s nted pests? Pe (904)682st Control -2565

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(904)819-0234• 134 Masters Drive St. Augustine, FL The Answering Machine

I dialed a number and got the following recording: “I am not available right now, but thank you for caring enough to call. I am making some changes in my life. Please leave a message after the beep. If I do not return your call, you are one of the changes.”

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