40 and me So I’m sitting there, just minding my business, when this number comes sidling all loose-jowled, yellow teeth, hairline receding, in a polyester suit with unbuttoned shirt revealing chest hair nestling gold chains gleaming and says, “How ya doin’ sweetheart?” “Just fine till you came along,” I reply. He chuckle-cackles, says, “Tell me how ya feelin,’ gettin’ closer to the other side.” “Don’t remind me,” I say. He puts up his hands like surrender. “Hey sweetheart, take it easy. I ain’t here to take your last confession, know what I’m sayin’?” I nod, curious. “I’m just here to give you a heads-up is all. Time waits for no man, and all that. So whachagonnadobout it, sister?” he says, grabbing his lapels, making a check-out-the-merchandise face. “Cuz I’ll be back. And next time I won’t be this handsome, but I won’t be leavin’ alone.” Ugh. I turn to the bartender, “another drink, please?” and when I turn back he’s gone, leaving just this number scrawled on a cocktail napkin.
~ Kim Baer
Fredericksburg Literary & Art Review Volume 3, Issue 1
FLAR is an independently published literary and art magazine located in Fredericksburg, Virginia.