PARK BENCH- DAY Two guys, JAMES and GILMORE are walking towards a park bench on a bright spring day. In between them sits STACY, a promiscuous girl whom both boys are seeking vigorously. JAMES (to GILMORE) Yo bro, you best not cock block the king on his way to the castle. GILMORE Suck my ass you man-hore. You think every girls’ mouth has your dick’s name on it. They sit, James on the left, Stacy in the middle, and gilmore on the right. STACY So boys, who’s going to help me with my homework? JAMES Wait, why did we come to the park again? i thought we were gonna be smokin a doobie. STACY Well I’d love to but Mrs. Ramsey is being a real bitch lately. She said she won’t let me walk at graduation unless I complete at least one homework assignment. GILMORE Wow, some people are just totally unreasonable. I mean shit, we’re seniors...who the fuck expects us to do homework? STACY Oh M G! That is like totally what I’m trying to say Gil! you don’t mind if I call you Gil, do you? GILMORE Oh, ofcourse not. Gil is cool. JAMES Dude you are so full of shit ya nerdy-ass ricer. You’re like the only one in our grade who still studies for his tests.
Gilmore starts to blush, clearly embarrassed. GILMORE Do you think I actually like studying? The only reason I still do it’s cus my parents will ground my Chinese ass if I don’t get impeccable grades. Two more weeks till summer and I am not gonna fuck that up. STACY Hey Gil, it’s so okay. I’m really glad there’s still someone not lazy enough to still study. It’s not like Mr. pot head over here is gonna be any help. JAMES Hey! I’m not a pot head. I prefer to be called an entreprenorial marajuana distributor. Classy, huh? GILMORE What’d it take you, like a month to come up with a fancy six sylable word so that you could try to not feel so bad about how big of a loser you are? JAMES I swear to God, one more word and I’ll nock your block off Moogoo GaiPan. Let’s just do this damn assignment so I can light up. I would’ve done it by now but Kobiashi over here is making me feel self conscious. STACY Here’s my notebook. Hands it James. JAMES oh, yeah...the Protestant "Refer Nation" GILMORE It’s Reformation retard. Jesus,
you’re driving me crazy...I’can’t believe i’m saying this but let’s just blaze.