The Non-Holiday Letter Holiday Letter Top 10 Things You Won't Find In Our Apartment 10) Katie awake after 9:00 PM 9) Alarming amounts of junk food (oh, wait…it's things you WON'T find…nevermind) 8) Someone who can cook well 7) A pet of any kind 6) Room that Katie left for Scott in the closet 5) Feng shui 4) Peace and quiet 3) A full Dr. Pepper can 2) Partially eaten doughnuts 1) Space
Top 10 Things Not Heard In The Abbott Household This Year 10) “I don't understand what all the fuss is about The Office” 9) “Scott, your weightlifting addiction is becoming a serious problem.” 8) “Katie, please turn off the baseball game.” 7) “There was hardly any traffic today” 6) “I wish I had some more papers to grade.” 5) “Wow, the Lakers sure do look good this year.” 4) “Maybe we should rent a smaller apartment.” 3) “What is this fantasy sports that you speak of?” 2) “Honey, would you let the dog out?” 1) “I love how you smell after a run.”
Top 10 Lame Excuses Used By Scott To Avoid Housework 10) It's not good for the environment to wash all that dish soap down the drain. 9) Dr. House doesn't have to do menial work; why should I? 8) I'll do it after I read Gone With the Wind. 7) My clothes fit better when they are dirty. 6) It was only a $100 security deposit, why should we clean the toilet? 5) Do I have to do everything around here? 4) I'll mow the lawn, if you do the rest. 3) At this point, we are going to be moving out in like 6 months; it's not worth it. 2) Domestic is a derivative of the Latin word for “house”….this is an apartment. 1) I'm busy typing our Non-Holiday Letter Holiday Letter.