By Morgan Weibel
I couldn’t make it to the North Pole, but I met jolly old St. Nick here while he was visiting. Not only did I submit my Christmas list, but he revealed some of his secrets.
Q: What’s your favorite kind of cookie? A: Oh, chocolate chip.
Q: Santa, what have you been doing to get ready for Christmas this year? A: Getting my Santa Suit out, making sure that all of the fur is in place and the bells are on tight. I’ve got to make sure my cape is ready to go too because I put that over the top. The last thing I do is set myself up for the insane asylum on the 26th.
Q: Which kind of milk do you prefer? A: I like chocolate.
Q: How do you know who’s been naughty or nice? A: Some children will say, “I haven’t been good, but do I still get a present?” And I’ll say, “Well yes: coal.” But usually it’s the way you have to learn the children. You can pretty much tell if a child has been good or not by their reaction. Q: Which reindeer is your favorite? A: Donner. That’s because he’s Rudolph’s dad. But they’re all my favorites because when you’ve got Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen and Rudolph, they get a little upset otherwise. I’ve got a lot of elves, but the reindeer have a monopoly on everything. I can say anything I want to the elves and they know they’re not going to get any cookies. For the reindeer I have one word, and it straightens them right out. Do you know what I call them? Venison. Q: How does Rudolph’s nose stay bright? A: It is something that was done with magic. This is also something his wife, Clarice, thinks is cute. He could have lost it, but I need him too much on the sleigh rides. Q: How do you make it to all of those houses in one night? A: It’s called a time warp. I slow down time with the time machine. I can do that with some of the special equipment that’s been put on my sleigh by elves. Q: What if the house doesn’t have a fireplace? A: I have magic dust I can use to open the door. And a lot of the times I’ll come down the chimney by doing the proper type of magic. Once a child asked me if I had a flame-retardant suit, and I told him I had a special suit for delivering presents. And he said, “Good, because sometimes we have a fire going and we don’t want you to burn your butt.”
Q: Does Mrs. Claus ever deliver the presents with you? A: No, she has to stay and keep the elves in line because they are troublesome. Like when Hermey wanted to become a dentist. I needed her there. Q: What is the best part about being Santa Claus? A: The smiles of the little children and the great stories some of them tell. Just hearing the stories brings warmth to my heart and a smile to my face. I also asked how he became Santa. His father was Santa Claus too, and he didn’t know it until many years later when he was a teenager. He found the suit in the closet. He comes from generations of Santas. My favorite story was a time Santa met with five generations of ladies at one of his appearances. The youngest was 6 years old, and it was her mother, her mother, her mother, and lastly, her mother. The oldest one, a little old lady, sat on his lap and she said, “Santa, do you know what I want?” Santa said, “No, what do you want?” “I’d love to have a man with a beard,” she replied to Santa’s surprise. “How old are you?” “I’m going to be 96. How old are you, Santa?” “As old as dirt.” “And you know what, Santa?” “What?” “You and me could make some mean mud pies together.” Santa has many stories about all of the people he has met over the years. He is writing them down in a book called, “The Man Behind the Suit.” You can visit him at the Rotary Lights. This is Santa’s 13th year at the Rotary Lights, and he enjoys seeing familiar faces. Santa is warm, jolly and generous as the stories go. He assured me I wouldn’t be getting coal this year.
DIY floral design event at Flowers By Guenthers to benefit the Carilee Fund at the Gundersen Medical Foundation.
KlutchChronicle.com \\ December, 2014