The Wake, Issue 6 BIZARRO, Fall 2014

Volume 14, Issue 6 | DEC 8 - DEC 21

Dangerous Dinning PG. 4 Oscar & Grammy Predictions PG. 7 Taking Advantage of Technology PG. 9

THE WAKE STUDENT MAGAZINE | VOLUME 14, ISSUE 6

EDITORIAL: Editor-in-Chief Grace Birnstengel Managing Editor Lauren Cutshall Cities Editor Emily Mongan Voices Editor Kayla McCombs Sound & Vision Editors Alex Nelson, Sam Schaust

Art Directors Lizzie Goncharova, Max Smith Copy Editors Sara Glesne, Lindsey Pastrorek Editorial Interns Lianna Matt, Johnny Tvedt, Shawna Stennes, Olivia Riley

A Closer Look at Pointergate PG. 5

Confessions From My Double Life PG. 7

Betty Danger’s Ferris Wheel Restaurant PG. 5

Oscar and Grammy Predictions PG. 8

Hillary Clinton Gift Guide PG. 6

Ariel Pink Can’t Keep His Mouth Shut PG. 9

Selling Butts vs. Accepting Butts PG. 6

Taking Advantage of Technology PG. 10

LETTER FROM THE EDITOR The end of the semester is approaching and we’re all feeling a little tired and uninspired.

Even at The Wake, where energy runs high and creativity Art Interns flows seamlessly, the feelings of “If I have to write one Cera Nelson, Andrew Tomten, more paper I’m going to collapse” and “Don’t make me Olivia Novotny, Breanna Vick, get out of bed and walk two miles to class in the snow” Breck Hickman are present and apparent.

Faculty Advisor Unfortunately, these feelings don’t really go away until Shayla Thiel-Stern we’ve finally hit “submit” on our last Moodle assignment of the semester, but in the meantime, we can learn to cope with these mind-numbing feelings of apathy and despair that finals season brings.

Public Relations/ For starters, give yourself a well-deserved study break Advertising Manager and see what our last issue of the semester has to offer.

Jennifer Burns We may have a lot that we’re dreading, but we also Social Media Manager have a lot to be excited about.

Abby Richardson Get excited about eating dinner on a ferris wheel Distributors (pg. 5). Get excited about award show season—the Ryan Condron, Grammys, the Oscars (pg. 8). Get excited about going Chris Roebber home to your small hometown (or giant home-city) for the holidays (pg. 7). And get excited about seeing your Production Interns Kirsten Erickson, Alexa Orak, Carter Gruss

PRODUCTION: Executive Director Kelcie McKenney Head Designer Kate Johnston Graphic Designers Amanda Gentle, Kayla Lutteke, Erin Slayton Web Manager Sam Gordon Finance Manager Ben Larwa

THIS ISSUE: Cover Image: Justin Sengly Photographers: Justin Sengly Illustrators: Peter Mariutto, Lizzie Goncharova, Olivia Novotny, Cera Sylar, Amar Hasshim, Russell Barnes, Abigail Rommel Contributing Writers: Nicole Carlson, Madeleine Kirchhoff, Gina Van Thomme, Maya Muerhoff, Madison Bloomquist, Niqq Helgeson, Abigail Rommel, Grace Birnstengel, Aron Wolde, Erik Newland, Ryan Meaney, Danielle Korby, Carter Jones, Amar Hasshim

©2014 The Wake Student Magazine.

All Rights Reserved.

Established in 2002, The Wake is a fortnightly independent magazine and registered student organization produced by and for students at the University of Minnesota.

The Wake Student Magazine 126 Coffman Memorial Union 300 Washington Avenue SE Minneapolis, MN 55455 The Wake was founded by Chrin Ruen & James DeLong.

loved ones’ faces light up when you give them the perfect gift—perhaps a Hillary Clinton mason jar? (pg. 6).

Thank you, loyal Wake-followers, first-time readers, staff, interns, freelancers, everyone, for being a part of The Wake in 2014. Know that you are more than welcome to be a part of The Wake in 2015, too.

See you next semester, Grace Birnstengel Editor-in-Chief

Disclaimer: The purpose of The Wake is to provide a forum in which students can voice their opinions. Opinions expressed in the magazine are not representative of the publication or university as a whole. To join the conversation email gbirnstengel@wakemag.org.

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ONE-PAGE MAGAZINE

WAKE RANTZ Since I have been at the U, the only thing I have truly learned is that practice exams are nothing like the actual exam. Correct me if I am wrong, but I was under the impression that practice tests are supposed to be to see what material will be on an actual exam. Why the fuck does this never actually seem to be the case? If you are a professor and reading this, please, stop fucking us all over and please attempt to end the panic attacks that occur in the middle of your exam when we realize your practice exam was a sick joke played on us all.

Sincerely, A pissed off student who is paying way too much for your shitty class I hate printers. When is the last time you used a printer seamlessly without error, orwithout even the slightest anxiety that something would go wrong? Printers have one job—to print. How hard can it be? Computers have three thousand jobs, and they do okay. But printers? Nope. They’re out of ink every other day, or they can’t connect to your computer, or there’s a paper jam and your hand is too fat to get in and fix it. Why are printers so expensive?

It’s 2014 and we can’t invent a printer that doesn’t sound like it’s exploding every time I have to print an essay.

Nothing is worse than, as a woman, being told that I’m being “dramatic” or “emotional” over things that are important to me. When I’m told that I’m “overreacting”, guess what? You’re making me feel like a stupid shrew bitch who shouldn’t care about anything. Women constantly being told that they’re dramatic doesn’t help when they become victims of violence and are faced with the decision to report it or not. “I shouldn’t confide in anyone, they’ll just think I’m overreacting as always!”

Annoyed with something?

Send your 10 to 150-word rant to rants@wakemag.org and yours might be in our next issue!

SECRET STUDY SPOTS

By Danielle Korby It’s almost finals week, and that inevitably means that students will be cramming into libraries and lounges across campus. If you’re looking to avoid the stress of finding an open seat in a packed library, hit up one of these lesser-known study spots: 1. Northrop: Many students know about Northrop’s newly renovated concert hall, but what you may not know is that Northrop also has several quiet study spaces on each of its floors, with tables on the third floor that overlook Northrop’s grand chandeliers.

2. Bordertown Coffee: Located in an old fraternity house off of University Avenue, this non-profit coffee house’s warm and friendly atmosphere is perfect for studying in the chilly weeks to come.

3. Architecture and Landscape Architecture Library: This small library on the second floor of Rapson Hall is a peaceful study spot with great lighting due to its floor-length windows. Large tables and individual study spaces are interspersed among bookshelves, art, and architectural models.

WE LANDED ON A COMET!

By Amar Hasshim

By Carter Jones

“…the impossible can be done…” “...sending men to the moon again.”

On Nov. 12 2014, the Rosetta satellite that was launched in March of 2004 finally arrived at its destination and successfully delivered a probe to the surface of a comet named P67/C, a tasked that was deemed to be impossible. Now, since we have proven that the impossible can be done, the big question is: what’s next? Many astronomy and space fanatics argued that since we had sent a satellite to a comet, why not send one to moons in the solar system that was said to possibly contain life, like Europa or Titan, and search for it? How about sending men to the moon again, and perhaps even Mars? Some science fiction fans even argued that we should make science fiction into science fact by building a Death Star or taking a journey to space, like in the movie Interstellar.

43%

Snapchat—the social media app that gives users the ability to share pictures with one another for a pre-determined and limited amount of time—recently released its newest product: Snapcash. This addition to the app, in partnership with Square, will allow users to connect their debit cards to their Snapchat accounts and send money to each other simply by typing in a dollar amount and pressing send. As if moms needed another reason to hate this company. The app that has leaked thousands of users’ (many of them underage) private pictures onto the Internet can now be trusted with your bank account information! What could go wrong?

And the best part? Hormone-crazed teenagers can now put an actual dollar amount value on each other’s pictures. Soliciting nudes has never been so easy… I hope my mom doesn’t ask where I got the money for her Christmas presents.

Nap Room

39%

Which addition could we use in Coffman?

Petting Zoo

15% Bar

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SNAPCASH: A SUGAR DADDY’S SWEET DREAM

3%

Hair Salon

THE WAKE CITIES

A Sign of the Times?

A closer look at Pointergate

By Nicole Carlson Libin appreciates that KSTP has You may have seen it on Twitter, or KSTP itself: addressed its own performance, Minneapolis Mayor Betsy Hodges was photographed but does acknowledge there with a criminal while flashing a known gang sign! What was “room for improvement.” scandal! Twitter hashtags mocked the story, and even Jon Stewart covered it. But after looking deeper into “The context itself should’ve “Pointergate,” it becomes less funny, and more of an raised some red flags,” Libin said. example of how the media can be used to perpetuate stereotypes.

A number of critics have posed the question—if a white

The photo in question shows Navell Gordon, a “get man who was said to be a criminal flashing a “known gang out the vote” volunteer for local charity Neighborhoods sign” was next to Mayor Hodges, would KSTP care Organizing for Change, canvassing alongside the mayor. more about finding the truth?

The photo is obviously the result of two people not It’s possible, but KSTP has not apologized. “I think the lack knowing what to do with their hands as they posed, of an apology reflects the belief that there’s nothing to but KSTP ran with the idea that the pair were apologize for,” Libin said. In an interview with MPR, throwing up gang signs.

KSTP owner Stanley Hubbard shifts blame to the police, “KSTP did try to get the mayor’s side of the story,” Scott and emphasizes that the station would never have Libin, former KSTP news director and current University racist intentions. journalism professor said. “I know it’s frustrating for Law enforcement agencies said that if gangs saw the journalists to ask for someone else’s side of the story, and then be criticized for telling a story that’s incomplete.” photo, they might fight each other thinking one gang is

claiming to be aligned with the mayor. But Mayor Hodges wishes to increase police accountability, including the use of body cameras. In a blog post on her website, Mayor Hodges said she believes the police union used the story to “discredit this work.”

No matter who is at fault in the story, it raises questions about those who unknowingly rely on the media to shape their worldviews. Luckily, we have the power to try to reverse these stereotypes. “This controversy and the scope of it reflects something significant about social media,” Libin said. “I’ve seen worse stories that provoked far less outrage. Five years ago, I don’t think this thing would’ve spread the way it has today.”

Dangerous Dining

Betty Danger’s ferris wheel restaurant to open in early 2015

By Madeleine Kirchhoff

concerns that the ferris wheel and mini golf course will be annoying and an eye sore, but Bock has reassured them that it will be a pretty subtle attraction.

Coming soon to northeast Minneapolis: a restaurant in a ferris wheel. Betty Danger’s Country Club, set to open in early 2015, will introduce this totally new concept of dangerous dining to Northeast Minneapolis. Located on Marshall Street, Betty Danger’s will feature a 60-foot ferris wheel, tacos, beer, and mini golf. Betty Danger’s creators bill the restaurant as “a country club on crack,” a “preppy disaster,” and “a country club for the 99 percent.”

The vision of Betty Danger’s is to be a unique and fun restaurant with “tree-top dining” where customers will be able to view the surrounding Minneapolis area while enjoying beer, cocktails, and some “Minnesota TexMex” food.

Owner Leslie Bock created Betty Danger’s to follow the “dysfunctional family” theme of her other restaurants.

Psycho Suzi’s Motor Lounge is the original restaurant in Bock’s “family,” along with Donny Dirk’s Zombie Den and a food truck called Undead Frank’s Zombie Bites.

The space on Marshall Street was the previous location of Psycho Suzi’s, which relocated to a larger location a few years ago. Bock first tried to sell the site, but then thought of the idea of Betty Danger’s and decided to buy the location back.

The location features a patio that will be used for Betty

The ferris wheel is made of 16 slow moving carts, creating an enjoyable dining experience and allowing visitors to soak up the views. It will be more like a vertically rotating patio than a carnival ride. Surprisingly, Betty Danger’s will stay open all year, even in the freezing Minnesota winter— except for occasional technical difficulties, of course. lizzie goncharova

Danger’s, and will also feature the ferris wheel and mini golf course with eight and a half holes—how the “half” hole works remains to be seen. Citizens have expressed

If you’re planning to dine dangerously at Betty Danger’s Country Club, expect to make a reservation. Seats in the ferris wheel will be limited, but there will be a traditional restaurant inside the building as well if you prefer your dining to be a little less dangerous.

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THE WAKE CITIES

The Definitive Hillary Clinton Gift Guide Tis the season for power suits and democracy

By Gina Van Thomme

for the Trendsetter

Ready for Hillary is a political action committee supporting the queen of pantsuits and the woman who is singlehandedly keeping the hairspray industry afloat in her run for the Oval Office. The campaign comes with a fully stocked gift shop, providing some ¬unique ways to show support for Mrs. Hillary Rodham Clinton’s proposed run in the 2016 presidential election.

No matter who’s on your holiday shopping list this year, Ready for Hillary has a gift perfect for them. So this holiday season, put the gift of America under the tree as you celebrate liberty and shoulder pads for all.

RFH Mason Jars—$20.16 Just when you think that nothing could be hipper than drinking out of a mason jar, Ready for Hillary comes along and laser prints political affiliation onto them. The jars come in packs of four, making them perfect for argument-filled family dinners that are guaranteed to breed lasting resentment. And the price—so affordable, so subtle…

For the Groom

For the Newborn

H Logo Cufflinks—$50 Why should brides have all the fun? These handolivia novotny polished cufflinks can be your groom’s something blue. Let a passion for democracy join him at the altar as he says ‘I Do’ to a life of love, happiness, and health care reform for all.

For the Animal-lover

Lucky Cat Collar—$20.16 This stylish orange and gray cat collar makes the perfect gift for the animal-lover who is feline ready for Hillary. Any cat will love the feel of this recycled polyester collar strangling it with the promise of a brighter tomorrow.

For the Techie

Born Ready Onesie—$20.16 So what if babies do nothing but drool, poop, and sleep? Every child is a future voter and it’s never too early to start instilling a little democracy. This outfit makes a thoughtful gift for that expecting Republican couple that moved in next-door.

Mobilize Your Support Phone Case—$20.16 Now your phone can be as stylish in its case as Hillary is in her signature pantsuit. This iPhone 5 case features a stylish black and white print of Mrs. Clinton, giving any tech-savvy individual a chance to appreciate her perfectly coiffed hair and reassuring expression whether they are texting, tweeting, or Tindering.

THE WAKE VOICES

Selling Butts vs. Accepting Butts The fairness of censorship

By Maya Muerhoff The appeal of the Internet is that you can represent yourself in the way you want to be represented. Facebook is the most common way people create their “Internet footprint” and interact with the World Wide Web. Recently, there has been some discussion on the type of media allowed on Facebook, particularly referring to images of women. Most recently, a woman, Milli Hill, was blocked from Facebook for one week after sharing a picture of her natural birth.

Although this picture caused quite the scandal, you can still find the picture on other websites that are discussing its appropriateness. Most of the image is distorted because the natural birth took place in water, so all you can manage to discern is a woman’s butt and the head of a baby.

The reason Hill’s photo has gotten so much attention is because of its comparison with the recent photo shoot of model, Kim Kardashian, called “Break the Internet,” featuring not only a shot of her bare butt, but also a complete frontal shot. These images can be found in excess

6 | DEC 8 - DEC 21

on the web and are quickly becoming an Internet meme.

The wide acceptance and celebration of these photos are concerning when compared to Hill’s photo, which was deemed inappropriate for the Facebook community.

The stark difference in the Internet’s acceptance of these two photos raises some much-needed conversation about the celebration of women’s nude bodies as a form of pleasure vs. the criticism of women’s bodies doing what they were meant for. Who decides what is appropriate for the Internet and why are some bodies accepted and others berated?

This question has no single answer, but one source of this type of thought is the objectification women have suffered and the general discomfort with women’s bodies in regards to periods, childbirth, and breast-feeding.

they are passive, airbrushed, and sexualized than when they are powerful, active, and real.”

Hill puts it best in her interview with BuzzFeed when she says the comparison of her photo with the Kim Kardashian photo shoot “highlights nicely the way society finds women’s bodies more readily acceptable when

One way to counter this type of thought is through discussion and exposure on the topic, encouraging women to appreciate the natural beauty of their bodies, and, of course, crushing the patriarchy.

lizzie goncharova

THE WAKE VOICES

Confessions From My Double Life What it means to move from a small town to a city

By Madison Bloomquist All my friends have heard me joke about my Wisconsinite past. It seems pretty unbelievable—I graduated from a high school of 120 students, in a population-unincorporated town, in a county with no stoplights. Many University of Minnesota students hail from tiny Midwestern towns, but most people think I’m exaggerating when I talk about mine. I can humbly assure you I am not. Throughout my 18 years there, I had one goal: get out as quickly as possible.

Everyone knows I love my little town and the people in it. Still, I always felt like I was on the outside looking in.

I would never truly fit in, and by third grade I knew I was meant to live in a city. I dreamt of New York City, Paris, Rome, and anywhere but Wisconsin. I got my wish when I started college, but it complicated things more than ever.

Over a year ago, I moved into a tiny dorm room at the U. I didn’t know anyone—including my roommate. I had no idea how to use MetroTransit, I got lost the first time I went downtown, and I could constantly hear sirens and traffic. I missed Wisconsin. Life was so much easier and simpler there, and sometimes all I wanted to do was go

home. Now, though, I cannot imagine life anywhere else. The stranger I shared a room with is now my best friend, and all of the other friends I quickly made have become my family. I can give bus route directions to anyone who asks and I’ve learned nothing is more beautiful than Nicollet Mall during Christmas. I learned how to sleep and study through noise. The rare quiet moments now make me uneasy. Nothing is handed to me here the way it was back home, but I made this life for myself and I love every beautiful and broken part of it. I don’t always know what I’m doing and neither does anyone else. I didn’t end up in New York City or Paris— at least not yet—but I am where I’m meant to be.

Soon I’ll be back in Wisconsin for the holidays. I can’t wait to see my family, Lake Superior, and unpaved roads, but I’ll miss Minneapolis every day. It took me a while to realize that I can love two places equally, and that I’ll always miss someone somewhere, but that just makes me lucky. My heart will always be split between Minneapolis and Wisconsin.

That’s okay; it just means I’ll always be partially home.

cera sylar

THE WAKE SOUND & VISION

James Franco Continues Conquest of All Things Artistic Franco’s band, Daddy, set to unveil full-length album in early 2015

By Niqq Helgeson Actor, professor, and all-around dabbler James Franco has further sophisticated his jack-of-all-trades act, adding a full-length album to the eclectic list of accomplishments that crowd his CV. Franco’s experimental band, Daddy, whose members consist of him and fellow Rhode Island School of Design classmate Tim O’Keefe, is set to release a new LP titled Let Me Get What I Want in the waking moments of 2015.

The creative process behind the project is certainly characteristic of the off-kilter Pineapple Express star, who claims that he has strived to assert Daddy “beyond `the art of sampling’ and into the act of appropriation, using one medium to influence another.” The duo arranged a collection of Franco’s Smiths-inspired poems from his collection Directing Herbert White, with the

help of former Smiths’ bassist Andy Rourke, into a ten track sonic narrative.

That’s right: Smiths songs were transfigured into poetry, only to reemerge from the chambers of Franco’s psyche as songs again (because, you know, art). A music video will accompany each recording, which can be viewed either on its own or as a slice of an hour-long looping film that chronicles the relationships between three AMAR HASSHIM characters. And in case his presence on the album wasn’t glaringly apparent before, Franco painted portraits “Bound 2” music video shot-for-shot). corresponding to each track as album art.

Independent of Franco’s ability to gain credibility in With the upcoming release from Daddy, Franco has different spheres resides a broader, more critical question: yet again affirmed himself as one of the more intriguing to what extent are Franco’s endeavors self-serving, and case studies coming out of the 21st century American how much are they truly for the expansion of artistic entertainment industry. His array of artistic offerings boundaries? Franco’s efforts could either yield the term call into question the existing credence that one can “polymath,” or draw parallels to Macaulay Culkin and The only excel in a single discipline if one wants to be widely Pizza Underground. In any event, the fundamental accepted in mainstream culture (to further illustrate: questions about art and acclaim in the 21st century Franco has taught at numerous institutions such as that his projects beg answers to provide enough NYU, written eight books, won a Golden Globe, and justification for him to stake a claim in yet another most importantly masterfully reenacted Kanye West’s artistic foothold.

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THE WAKE SOUND & VISION

Early Grammy Predictions

Queen Bey Reigns Again

By Russell Barnes Grammy nominations will be announced Dec. 5, but it’s clear that Beyoncé will receive more nominations than any other act.

Let’s face it—Queen Bey had THE year of her career thanks to her secret album. As a result, she will likely receive at least six nominations, including three of the big four for Album of the Year (Beyoncé) and Record and Song of the Year (for “Drunk In Love”).

Sam Smith is bound to make his Grammy debut, with near-guaranteed nominations for Best New Artist, Album of the Year, and Record of the Year. Expect “Stay With Me” to get snubbed for Song of the Year, and for Smith to potentially get snubbed by Beyoncé for Album of the Year. However, if Smith wins at least one Grammy, it will be for his vocals on Disclosure’s “Latch,” which is a shoe-in for Best Dance Recording.

Other artists you can expect to receive their first nominations include Iggy Azalea, Charli XCX, and Tove Lo.

Expect none of these artists (except possibly Azalea for Ariana Grande’s “Problem”) to be first-time winners, sadly. “Fancy” will likely be nominated for best Rap/Sung Collaboration, but have no chance of beating “Drunk In Love.” Boom Clap, Charli’s song from The Fault in Our Stars, will likely lose to Idina Menzel’s “Let It Go” for the Best Song Written for Visual Media Category. Tove Lo’s “Habits” will most definitely be nominated for Best Pop Solo Performance and possibly for Best New Artist, but her competition is stiff.

We can sadly (or excitedly, if you think all she does is culturally appropriate) expect Katy Perry to inch closer to Brian McKnight and Snoop Dogg’s record 16 nominations without winning a single Grammy. Prism will be nominated for Best Pop Vocal Album, inevitably lose to Sam Smith’s In The Lonely Hour. “Dark Horse” will score at least two nominations for Best Pop/Song Collaboration and Best Music Video, but will likely face a Problem with Grande and Azalea in the former, and feel “Pretty Hurts” to Beyoncé in the latter.

Best New Artist could be one of the tightest categories of the night, and Smith doesn’t have it locked. He faces potential competition from two major stars—Iggy Azalea and Ariana Grande (who is eligible, despite being on album number two).

Beyoncé, on the other hand, appears to have multiple categories locked, and is the true superstar to watch when the 57th Annual Grammy Awards air Feb. 8.

An Early Oscar Roundup

Drum roll, please…

By Abigail Rommel

Winter break is coming soon and, without fail, so are the Academy Award nominations. Theaters all over Minnesota are getting ready for bored, cold Minnesotans to flock to their seats and binge-watch hyped-up movies like Selma and Unbroken before the Oscars, while what seems like movies upon movies are coming out Christmas day. Plenty of these movies will re-enter theaters to refresh memories or serve as an introduction to those who missed their first runs. Alejandro González Iñárritu’s Birdman and Richard Linklater’s Boyhood are just two of this year’s films that are receiving a lot of attention for their creativity, but Damien Chazelle’s Whiplash is definitely my pick for the underdog of the year.

Nominations are yet to be announced, but based off of what I’ve seen and read about, this is a tentative prediction for the best picture nomination lineup: Birdman, Boyhood, Whiplash, Interstellar, and Foxcatcher. Keep in mind that many movies with Oscar potential aren’t released until Christmas day, because that is the ultimate deadline to be considered as a part of the nomination pool.

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Birdman and Boyhood are standouts for the notoriety they have received due to their originality. Birdman, of course, has been most noted for the “meta” feel it gives off as a film production about a theater production.

And Emmanuel Lubezki’s cinematography left its mark here, as it did with Gravity last year. The absence of cuts in the film is a definite trademark.

Boyhood undoubtedly left an impression this summer with its unique approach of following a character through a plot, taking that idea to a very literal level.

Director Linklater is known for diving deep into character development and following characters, such as in the films composing his critically acclaimed trilogy: Before Sunrise, Before Sunset, and Before Midnight. Boyhood takes ideas from his renowned catalog and puts it into one production that spanned more than a dozen years of filming. I predict

some acknowledgement for his unique style.

Now, while Whiplash did not follow the same character throughout the course of puberty and although it may use more traditional cuts, it was still the low-budget darling of the year, in my humble opinion. This underdog swept me off my feet with its intensity. This film about a drummer and his extreme teacher was so outrageous, yet so real at the same time. I’m not 110 percent sure that it will be nominated, but the amount of work that went into this production is so obvious and so amazing (especially considering it was crafted by a young, less than 30-year-old director).

Let the drum roll begin now for Whiplash to beat the odds this year.

THE WAKE SOUND & VISION

Ariel Pink Can’t Keep His Mouth Shut L.A. lo-fi artist takes jabs across music genres

AMAR HASSHIM

By Ryan Meaney Leading up to the release of his new album (pom pom), Ariel Pink has done very little to gain himself any new fans. Beginning in early October this year, Pink has seen the ire of some of indie music’s biggest names, becoming what many consider to be indie rock’s most hated figure.

Pink released a statement in early October claiming that he was contacted by Madonna’s record label asking for his help on her next album. Pink stated that his help was needed for her songwriting, saying in short that she had not made a good record since her first and that she needs to get away from making songs with big electronic beats and ridiculing her dance moves. This caused a firestorm on Twitter, with artists such as Grimes calling him a “misogynist,” among other things.

In a recent interview with The Guardian, Ariel addressed the words from Grimes as well as the recent amount of abhorrence he has received over the past few months. He went on to call Grimes “stupid and retarded” for believing anything that was said by Interscope, who released a statement saying Madonna had never heard of Ariel Pink. Throughout the article, Pin makes a case for why he is not the villain everyone makes him out to be. He is simply an artist who wants to be left alone to make his music, and he has unfortunately been cursed with a proverbial foot in his mouth.

The saddest part is the fact that many people will read these quotes and tweets and automatically hold an opinion of him without ever hearing his music. For the last fifteen years or so, Ariel Pink has been one of the most influential figures in the world of underground indie rock. His take on pop music has been viewed as truly groundbreaking, with his lo-fi sound creating a sound that has spawned followers such as Girls and Kurt Vile.His songs are creative and free flowing, melding genres together and giving new meaning to the term “DIY.” Whenever a celebrity or famous athlete would wind up in trouble, my parents would always tell me that you can’t truly know somebody through a television screen or the Internet.

So yes, Ariel Pink is an ass, but don’t let that hinder his musical talent and creativity. He is a musician first, and a public figure second. The spotlight can make people do and say crazy, stupid things. I will still thoroughly enjoy his new album, tweets or no tweets.

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THE WAKE FEATURE

JUSTIN SENGLY

Taking advantage of technology Design senior uses gif-obsession and Twitter wit to find personal and professional success

By Grace Birnstengel In his minimalistic, plant-ridden, bedroom of the Ikea display room nature, Joey Mueller set up a multicompartmental, luxurious cage for his new pet chinchilla, Adobe—named after the company who developed Adobe Photoshop and other design-oriented programs.

While Mueller was undoubtedly excited to have a new cuddly friend to take care of, play with, and watch grow— he seemed equally as excited to have Adobe enhance his life on the Internet. “My chinchilla is going to have a YouTube channel. His name is Adobe, he is going to be famous,” Mueller tweeted.

Mueller has never made himself a resume, but he has over 132 thousand Twitter followers and developed Gifit, a free app used to text millions of reaction gifs to your friends. Mueller, 21, is a senior graphic design student at the university’s College of Design, and he takes more risks than most people.

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But it’s this constant risk-taking that has caused a slew of rumors about Mueller to travel on campus and throughout Minneapolis. It’s a party topic: friends-offriends claim Mueller makes $200 dollars every time someone downloads his app. It’s common “knowledge” that Joey is sponsored by Taco Bell on Twitter.

“[Mueller] has a lot of ideas and he does a lot of the ideas,” Dalager said. “But I never actually do mine.

That’s the difference between him and most people.”

In reality, Mueller makes only a couple of dollars a day from app downloads. He’s not sponsored by Taco Bell, but once, he and his friends hopped on a Taco Bell party bus of sorts and ate boxes filled with free Doritos Locos tacos.

Like most current 20-something-year-olds, Mueller began his social media career on MySpace. Unlike most others, he didn’t just use MySpace to connect and share his life virtually with friends, but rather to customize and make MySpace profile layouts. “It’s funny looking back on that, because I didn’t even think of it as web design,” Mueller said. “I was interested in and learning all this design stuff without even realizing it.”

Mueller grew up in Blaine, Minn. with an interest in web design. He was voted “most likely to save the world” by his high school senior class, and according to long-time friend Neva Dalager, will “of course be a multi-billionaire in ten years.”

While he exercised his creative skills on social media via MySpace since 6th grade, his “Internet fame” didn’t surface until his senior year of high school. Mueller managed to garner over 70 thousand followers on his Tumblr account, just by posting funny photos paired

THE WAKE FEATURE with witty comments. “I don’t even know what started it,” he said. “It took just a couple good text posts.” But by the end of his freshman year of college, the Tumblr fame got old. So naturally—he moved to Twitter. @JYMLR, Mueller’s Twitter account, currently has a following of over 132 thousand, and it’s growing every day. His popularity here, however, wasn’t just from being a funny guy. Mueller made a website where he bought and sold Twitter followers to those looking to get “Twitter famous.” He sold to bands, artists, and businesses for four months, and for every order, there would always be an extra amount of “leftover” followers. “So I just sent them to myself,” Mueller said.

The leftovers piled up. At one point, Mueller had over 600 thousand followers just from the leftovers—and that’s when he got a call from The New York Times.

“They were like, ‘Hey, we’re doing a story on Internet fame, and we’d like to feature you,’” he said. Mueller complied, but avoided most of the questions regarding how he got his followers.

After the Times released the story, Mueller didn’t need to collect fake followers anymore. “People started reading the story and following me,” he said. “I requested that Twitter remove the fake followers from my account.”

filled them up with more tacos than they could eat, and drove them back to campus.

But more critically, Mueller’s Twitter following gave him a perfect space to market his very first app—Gifit—an app that allows users to find and text gifs by categories such as “thumbs up” or “eye roll,” using an already-existing database of gifs.

Because most people use gifs to express themselves humorously, exposing an app solely made to share gifs to his like-minded Twitter followers was only logical.

Over 100 thousand people have downloaded Gifit.

The idea for Gifit was born in a web design class.

Mueller’s assignment last fall was to prototype an app—meaning design the idea for an app that looks and works like it would, but isn’t actually functional.

The interest for Gifit came from being on Tumblr and constantly experiencing reaction gifs—gifs that express a certain emotion and are appropriate to use as a reaction to something. “That was a huge thing [on Tumblr],” Mueller said. He then came across Giphy, a website that allows users to search and share gifs, and had the idea to make this same concept available through an app on your phone.

Without the extra followers, Mueller still maintains his giant Twitter following using the same tactics he used on Tumblr—pairing funny images with a witty comment.

“My professors are always like, ‘Graphic design is just text and image,’” he said. “And that’s what I did on Tumblr and now do on Twitter—just pair text and image.”

Over the summer, Mueller found himself bored and without a job, so he decided to bring the idea to life.

Three months of back-and-forth communication with a group of coders in Pakistan made Gifit’s launch possible at the end of the summer. “I wished I could just do the coding myself, but learning to code would just take so much time,” Mueller said. “My skill set is of better use in other areas.”

The majority of Mueller’s tweets reflect strange things he experiences every day, funny thoughts or ideas he has, or things that everyone thinks about but doesn’t know how to put into words. A photo of a pick-up truck with a larger-than-usual back end paired with “If Kim Kardashian was a transformer” got 21 retweets and 37 favorites. A photo of a huge crowd spanning several blocks in New York City paired with “is this the line for the iPhone” got eight retweets and 20 favorites.

The concept of the app changed throughout the creation process, as Mueller initially planned on downloading thousands of gifs and tagging them manually into different categories. “I started freaking out because I knew that wasn’t going to work,” he said. “But then I found the Giphy database and got permission from them to use it.”

Not only did Mueller’s Twitter use open the door for creative and humorous freedom, but it also gave he and his friends something arguably more important—free tacos. After tweeting several times about Taco Bell (“I am never eating taco bell again today”), Mueller got a direct message from @TacoBell asking him to be at a certain location at a certain time—and to bring friends.

A strange request from a strange company, but Mueller was in. “I didn’t know what was going on,” he said. “I was really confused, but I told all my friends to go to that spot.” And they did. Mueller and his friends were met by a coach bus lead by a Taco Bell marketer—inviting them on the bus to film a commercial and get free tacos. The bus drove the crew to the nearest Taco Bell,

Although he would like it to be, Mueller doesn’t think that Gifit will ever become extremely popular. It is, however, paying off, through advertising, for what he invested into it. “It was a good investment because it’s a cool thing I can show to future employers,” Mueller said.

Mueller now knows more than enough about the art of and desire for gif-sharing, and will even argue with you on the pronunciation of “gif” (hard or soft “g”), but ultimately, the addition of user feedback to his design portfolio is Gifit’s greatest asset to him.

“I’m always thinking ahead,” Mueller said, and he’s always thinking about his next venture. Currently, Mueller has his hands in several different design and technology startups—including one that helps businesses do more on the web for less money. Mueller also plans to start a company that puts out sweatpants with all-over crazy prints. He even has a few new secret apps in the works— an app for golf courses, an app that’s more of an art project, social experiment, and a play on how we use technology, and, yes, even an app that plays chinchilla calls, making it easier for owners to tame their chinchillas.

He may not have a resume, but Mueller’s motto is “I’ll do it for free, and it’ll be so good that you’ll want to pay me.”

After releasing the app, Gifit got a lot of attention from technology blogs, and more people are using the app every day. “I’ve seen two random strangers using it in public,” Mueller said. “And that’s really fun.”

JUSTIN SENGLY

But it’s this constant risk-taking that has caused a slew of rumors about Mueller to travel on campus and throughout Minneapolis.

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THE WAKE SOUND & VISION

3 REVIEWS

littlebigplanet.playlist.com

Little Big Planet 3

tvontheradioband.com

TV on the Radio: Seeds

By Aron Wolde With more content, LittleBigPlanet 3 has continued to give users even more things to do and to make. And with the added ability to add all the content from a user’s previous LittleBigPlanet experience, the game allows for creative symmetry without forcing experienced players to start from scratch. LBP 3 follows the same structure as the previous versions with the protagonist being the lovable sack person. While the sack person has always been charming and fun, LBP 3 has added more players to the repertoire—ones that can move, act, and dress in remarkably different ways.

The game also comes with new personal tools so players can do even more with the game. Essentially, LBP 3 has added more ways to have fun. However, with the game’s improved visual flair and added depth of level complexity, players will be forced to deal with longer wait times due to slow loading, and online buffering is sure to occur without a foolproof connection.

If online gaming isn’t your focus, story mode plentifully sums up every new thing LBP 3 has to offer, including: a hard-to-ignore and phenomenal soundtrack, new tools for your sack person to use, and the introduction of voice acting for sack person and friends. But be warned, story mode is best played for its interesting gameplay rather than completion of its (ironically) notso-creative story. If you like playing happy-go-lucky games that have something new to offer in terms of mechanics and creativity, then LittleBigPlanet 3 is for you. If you are a story-driven gamer that prefers speedy load times and online play, then look elsewhere.

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Far-cry.ubi.com

Far Cry 4

By Erik Newland Far Cry’s new location is one rather unlike the jungles of the previous game. It takes place in Kyrat, a fictional Himalayan country next to India. Other than the differences in deadly fauna, among other new aspects of the spectacular world of Kyrat, surprisingly little about how Far Cry 4 plays, compared to its predecessor, has changed.

You play as Ajay Ghale, a native of Kyrat, who returns from America to bring his mother’s ashes back to their homeland. Ajay gets caught up in a rebellion against the despotic and fashionable king of Kyrat, Pagan Min. Min is my favorite kind of villain, funny yet hateable. Together the eclectic and exciting cast of characters defines the story of Far Cry 4. There’s a power struggle between the two leaders of the rebellion that the player has to choose between, and a host of memorable personalities like Longinus, the gun-crazed priest who says, “For the meek shall inherit the earth, my friend. All they need are some good guns!” However, Ajay’s character leaves a lot to be desired.

Far Cry 4’s gameplay is a near carbon copy of Far Cry 3, where you hunt animals to upgrade your gear and take on missions, capture outposts, and even climb towers to uncover the map. There’s now co-op, but not in story missions, which while it’s nothing groundbreaking, is still very well done. While taking in the breathtaking world of Kyrat, just make sure to watch out for honey badgers!

By Nicole Carlson For listeners who appreciate TV on the Radio for their versatility and unpredictability, the new album Seeds may be a little underwhelming. Instead of going above and beyond the accessible, they decided to play it safe on this one. That does not, however, mean that it wasn’t done well. It was not far off from Nine Types of Light, and featured plenty of Tunde Adebimpe’s gooey vocals. As with Light, many of the songs have romantic themes. Only “Right Now” hinted at politics, so the band has seemingly stepped off their soapbox.

The album starts off with songs in typical verse/chorus structure, but tracks like “Happy Idiot” captured more interest and have the right elements to get stuck in your head all day. In the chorus of “Careful You,” they cleverly incorporated barely-varied lyrical sounds: “I will care for you /Oh, careful you.” Any disappointment with unchanging song formats was squashed with the track “Ride.” It begins with simple and repetitive piano chords and slowly builds intensity until the song’s ramp. Some of their punk roots are found within the distortion in the opening of “Winter” and the heavy drum and guitar parts in “Lazerray.”

It should be noted that the band lost its bassistGerard Smith to cancer in 2011. Though “Trouble” is about heartbreak, lyrics such as “Everything’s gonna be okay” could apply to more than just moving on from a romance.

Seeds closes with its title track, which is equally as optimistic. This album represents healing and hopefulness, giving it more of a pop sound—for better or worse.

st. paul welcom e to

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Grann y Donuts

A quiet gem of fried cakes in (West) St. Paul

shawnna stennes

By Shawnna Stennes In the suburban depths of West St. Paul, in between an abandoned Blockbuster and a battery store, sits a donut shop so humble you may even doubt that it’s a donut shop. With a closer look, you’ll see “Let’s Go Nuts For Donuts” scrawled across the window and then you’ll be certain.

Although you won’t see Granny coming out with any quirky combinations the likes of Minneapolis’ beloved Glam Doll Donuts, it has championed the originals: long johns, plain frosted, apple fritters, glazed raised donuts, and essentially anything you would find in a gas station display case.

Granny Donuts, despite its dreary location, has remained here for more than 20 years, picking up a few awards and a number of passionate patrons on the way. Open every day of the year, owner Xuan To and his wife Que Bahn run the store themselves with the occasional help of their four children.

I ordered an apple fritter and a blueberry-glazed donut but To knew the naivety of a first-timer too well. He handed me a free plain glazed raised donut and had me taste it in front of him. We deconstructed the brilliance of the donut together, as he described the light dough and how quickly it melts in your mouth. Satisfied with

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my reaction, he beamed and said, “That’s Granny’s!”

While the blueberry-glazed donut and the apple fritter were a pleasure to sink my teeth into, the simple glazed raised donut stole my heart. However, two hours post-donuts, I wasn’t feeling too good. I recommend not ordering a blueberry-glazed donut, an apple fritter and a plain glazed raised donut at the same time. Stick to one.

You can find Granny Donuts at 1555 S. Robert St. in West St. Paul open from 6 a.m. to 10 p.m. on weekdays and from 6 a.m. to 6 p.m. on weekends. Bring cash!

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George W. Bush Born in St. Paul

Former Regions nurse chronicles one of the greatest cover-ups in history

By Kevin Beckman A former nurse at Regions Hospital in St. Paul, Minnesota, who has requested to remain anonymous, recently came forward with allegations that she assisted in the birth of George Walker Bush sixty-eight years ago, not in Connecticut—the state that the former president claims as his birthplace—but in Minneapolis’ twin sister city of St. Paul.

“I’ve been afraid to come forward for a very long time,” the anonymous source said. “But seeing as this happened many years ago and I’m entering my ninety-sixth year of life, I’ve decided that I’ve waited long enough.”

staff member who was in the ER at the time into his room,” the anonymous source said. “He said it was absolutely crucial that nobody say a word about what had happened.”

The source stated that George Bush Sr. didn’t go so far as to threaten the hospital employees, but that repercussions for speaking about the incident were “heavily implied.”

“It was scary,” she added. “He had this crazy look in his eyes and there was blood coming out of his nose The source, a nurse at the St. Paul hospital for forty-five while he talked. You know in The Shining when Jack Nicholson sticks his face through the hole in the door years, gave a striking and rather convincing eyewitness account of the birth of the 43rd president of the United and yells ‘Heeeeeere’s Johnny!’? That’s how he looked: States, saying that the delivery did, in fact, take place at desperate and manic. I don’t know what the Bushes Regions, not Grace-New Haven Hospital in New Haven, have against St. Paul, and I don’t want to. All I know is that for some reason, they will do just about anything Connecticut. According to the nurse, the doors to Region’s to keep the rest of the world from finding out.”

ER burst open at approximately four minutes to midnight on July 5, 1946, and a “deranged-looking” George Reporters caught up to President George W. Bush at Bush Sr. rushed in escorting an apparently “very a Waffle House he frequents near his family’s ranch pregnant” Barbara Bush. in Crawford, Texas. The former commander in chief, whose vice president once shot another human being “Neither one of them were famous at that point,” the in the face, looked cheerful and carefree until he was source said. “Remember, this was a long time ago.” asked about the allegations of his birthplace. Upon hearing the words “St. Paul,” it is reported that all color After his wife was admitted to the maternity ward, the drained from the face of the man who was certain he man who would later become the 41st president of would find WMDs in Iraq, and the hands, which signed the United States reportedly vomited into a trashcan, the contentious PATRIOT Act into law, began to shake muttering “We can’t be here, anywhere but St. Paul,” like they probably did during his days of heavy cocaine numerous times between rises in his gorge. usage in the ‘70s.

The couple’s reasons for being in the city at the time of their son’s birth are as of yet unknown.

George Walker Bush, who years later would lead the most powerful country in the free world, start a second ground war in Iraq, be blamed for the government’s incompetent response to Hurricane Katrina, and skillfully dodge two shoes thrown at him during a press conference in Baghdad, reportedly came into being around 2:14 a.m. on the morning of July 6, 1946 amidst his mother’s screams of agony and his father’s cries of “This isn’t fucking happening! Not here! For the love of God, not here!”

“After [the birth], George Bush Sr. called every hospital

“That’s just ridiculous,” ex-president Bush said, his voice quivering audibly. “I was born at Grace-New Haven Hospital in New Haven, Connecticut. Look it up on Wikipedia if you don’t believe me, it’s there! Whoever is doing this is obviously just looking for media attention.”

“I’ve never even been to Minnesota!” he added, apparently forgetting the numerous stops the Bush campaign made in the state during both the 2000 and 2008 presidential races. “Look it up. It’s on Wikipedia!”

“Is this about Katrina?” asked the near-hysteric formerpresident, who was already being led away by his

breck hickman secret service detail, “Or Iraq? It’s about Iraq, isn’t it? I goofed, OK? How many times do I have to say it? But you know you’re going back there, right? And this time it’s not even because of me or my dad. Look it up!”

Neither George Bush Sr. nor Barbara Bush could be reached for comment.

The allegations came only weeks after George W. Bush’s brother, 2016 Presidential hopeful Jeb Bush, was forced to make public his own birth certificate amidst claims that the former Florida Governor was actually born in Kenya.

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Sights, Sounds and Soul an exhibit of an age

By Aron Wolde Memories have a habit of demanding both the attention of the old as well as the young. This is the key strength of Sights, Sounds and Soul, a recent feature exhibit at the Minnesota History Center. The exhibit is a collection of photographs taken by local photographer Charles Chamblis.

While the exhibit is made up of a variety of photographs, other components are put on display to demonstrate the time in which the photos were taken. This is because Sights, Sounds and Soul is not an ordinary art exhibit, but an important look into the life of community through the eyes of one of its beloved characters.

Upon entering the third floor of the Minnesota History Center, recipients are greeted with two options of featured exhibits.

They can choose to enter either the vibrant colors of the museum’s Toys of the ‘50s, ‘60s and ‘70s exhibit or the cool atmosphere of the Sights, Sounds & Soul exhibit. Toys seems much more superficially entertaining, but one look at the corner of Sights, Sounds and Soul and patrons are immediately attracted by a force perhaps best described as the “soul”— that is to say the substantial energy of the ‘70s and ‘80s that pools from the truest identities of strangers through the photography of Charles Chamblis.

The exhibit isn’t necessarily an art piece, but a thorough description and documentation of a people of a time.

Soul shows us more than 60 candid photos of Chamblis and his peers that explore Minneapolis’ black community at the time: a community that seemed determined to exhibit its excellence.

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A walk through the exhibit begins with Chamblis’ documentation of the early music careers of some of Minnesota’s earliest R&B, jazz, and funk artists.

Photographs of happening people dressed to dance are everywhere along with captions and descriptions about the atmosphere and culture of the time.

Images captured include young men and women moving it in then-popular Twin Cities music clubs such as the Fox Trap Club, The Riverview Supper Club, Dirty Girty’s, and The Taste Show Lounge. As visitors move

through these photos, they learn the history of these people as well as that of some of Minnesota’s biggest musical players of the time.

Alongside these pictures are posters and costumes that reemphasize the changes and growth of the times.

Some of Prince’s most memorable outfits are display alongside stories of him as an audience member.

Stories that, amazingly enough, feature him as an enthused audience member rather than as the performer we know him to be today. The father and son duo are shown sharing quality time at Minneapolis’ Lake Calhoun, just before Jay’s NFL career started and while Chuck’s was just beginning to thrive. Chuck’s jersey and football can also be seen near the family photo.

A great deal of the exhibit is dedicated to demonstrating the power of music in the time, but half of the exhibit does a remarkable job representing Chamblis’ dayto-day life. Photos of ordinary human beings as they move around Minneapolis tell us a great deal about both the time period and Chamblis. Though the photos are candid, the people in the photos are aware of Chamblis’ presence—oftentimes, they smile toward the camera or toward others in the frame. Chamblis was known all over as a local shutterbug, according to the stories displayed between photos. He and his camera

were an expected piece of the community. When the photos were taken, they didn’t just come off as posed reactions. Instead, they display reactions of sincerity and love; something that one has when seen by someone they care for.

Chamblis has created an exhibit that stands as both a testament to his artistic fortitude and social acceptance. He wasn’t an artist taking an outside view, but a member of the community that allowed him to chronicle its growth, its changes, and its memories.

Sights, Sounds and Soul will be displayed at the Minnesota History Museum until Jan. 4, 2015.

Tickets are $9 for students and $12 for adults.

The Grander Things appreciating st. paul’s grand avenue

By Grace Birnstengel

Before I knew Hennepin, Lyndale, and Lake, there was another street that occupied my heart—Grand Avenue.

Grand starts as a steep uphill along highway 35E and becomes a 5-mile-long, east/west-running journey through St. Paul, cutting through dozens of restaurants, coffee shops and bakeries, and quaint local shops and businesses.

adolescence and into my teen years, we would have “explore St. Paul” days. My mom and I would visit places like the Cathedral, the beautiful Saint Paul Public Library downtown, McNally Smith College of Music, and my most favorite—Grand Avenue.

I grew up in a small suburb of St. Paul with parents that rarely ventured to the western lands of Minneapolis. It took a Timberwolves game or a restaurant my dad just had to try to get them to the 612. So, without a car or any real knowledge of what was in Minneapolis besides First Avenue and Lake Calhoun, I was pretty much stuck with what St. Paul had to offer—which was a lot.

The best way to experience Grand Avenue is simple. Just walk. No matter where you are on the Grand trail—near Lexington, Hamline, or Snelling, among other cross streets—you will run into something. I recommend wandering down the street and in and out of shops guided by your own curiosity and desires, but drastic Minnesota temperatures don’t always inspire this kind of aimless exploring. So here are a few of the grandest things Grand has to offer.

My mom had an affinity for St. Paul as she attended St. Catherine University and worked downtown St. Paul for several years after graduating. Throughout my

GRAND FOOD: Café Latte Café Latte’s double-decker food heaven is my number one place to dine at it St. Paul. Served assembly-line style,

bizarro Café Latte has salads, sandwiches, fancy dips, chili, soup, and most importantly—a giant display case of cakes.

GRAND DESSERT: Grand Ole Creamery They have over 200 different flavors of ice cream and President Obama got ice cream there over the summer.

Enough said.

GRAND FUN: Paint Your Plate Spend an afternoon painting various ceramics (bowls, plates, mugs, tiles, etc) with your friends in the happiest, most colorful studio on earth. Then let the folks at Paint Your Plate dry, glaze, fire, and package your creations for pick up.

GRAND SHOPPING: Ten Thousand Villages Although not based in Minnesota, the St. Paul location is something to be proud of. Ten Thousand Villages is a fair trade organization that sells handmade art from 38 countries. Profits help pay for food, education, healthcare, and housing for disadvantaged artisans.

So on the next Saturday afternoon when your friends ask the dreaded “What do you want to do today?” Instead of suggesting the same old Minneapolis activities you do every weekend, suggest a trip to Grand Avenue.

St. Paul: Home of Jamaican Death Metal

the most important music genre in minnesota history

By Karl Witkowiak Memphis is the home of the blues. Seattle is the home of alternative rock and grunge. Now, ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the single most important genre of music of our time, originating right here in St. Paul, Minn.: Jamaican death metal.

Jamaican death metal was pioneered by a gorgeous specimen of a man named Adrian Jones, a man so rich in his knowledge of Jamaican culture and of the rhythmic qualities of death metal that you almost forget that he is just a scrawny, white guy who wasn’t even born in Jamaica. He created his band, Reggapocalypse in 2002 and, in turn, changed how everyone listens to typical death metal. The band introduced not only reggae themes into their music, but all of their lyrics are in patois, the natural language of Jamaica.

Mixed in with the growling vocals of Adrian Jones, the lyrics of all of Reggapocalypse’s songs are near impossible

to comprehend. Instead, the key factor in their music is its composition. You would think that mixing reggae music with death metal would be a recipe for disaster, but their mixing of the genres is nearly seamless and it makes for a sound unlike any other, only because no one else to date has been brave enough to mimic the feat. What makes it even more remarkable is that, with its blend of different styles, it can be played in pretty much any situation. Dance clubs? Sure. Mosh pits? Go ahead. Family get-togethers?

Of course! Lullabies for your kids? Absolutely!

Adrian Jones created nothing short of a milestone in music within our neighboring city of St. Paul. So inspirational was his style that plenty more Jamaican death metal bands have started popping up everywhere, mostly in the Midwestern United States. Some Jamaican death metal bands have also started forming in Jamaica. Even still, the best of the Jamaican death metal bands have made St. Paul their home, including Rastafarious, Jamaican Devils, and Splinterz.

All of these bands, while fantastic in their own rights, owe essentially all of their inspiration to Adrian Jones. He is the Kurt Cobain of Jamaican death metal.

In an interview with Rolling Stone, the interviewer asked Jones what his inspiration for creating Jamaican death metal was, in which he replied, “I dunno. I just felt like it.” True words of wisdom.

Thus is the history and the inspiration of Jamaican death metal, a staple of St. Paul history and culture. So, the next time you think about how amazing Jamaican death metal is, just remember that this wonderful style of music makes its home here in St. Paul, Minn.

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Raptors and Dragons and Moose, Oh My!

a totally accurate description of st. paul campus

By Olivia Riley Come with me and you’ll be in a world beyond imagination!

Clearly, I am speaking of the mysterious, magical, and totallymisunderstood St. Paul campus. St. Paul campus is the home of several programs, notably the College of Food, Agricultural and Natural Resource Sciences and the College of Design,(which, as we all know, is really just a cover for the American branch of Hogwarts.) While a trip to this part of the U is not for the faint of heart, if you survive, the rewards are indescribable.

Just jump on the campus connector and disembark on Buford Avenue to begin your journey. Greet the campus’ passionate, rugged, and only occasionally cannibalistic inhabitants, and see if you can catch a glimpse of the shadowy figures ghosting along inside the high, barred windows of Bailey Hall. If you’re feeling particularly adventurous or bloodthirsty, you can pay a visit to one of the feuding sororities that rule the campus, Lambda Delta Phi or Beta of Clovia. Although both houses’ armies have agreed to sign the ceasefire agreement in light of the recent firebombing incident, guerilla activity and border

skirmishes are still common. So, basic siege gear is recommended if you’re planning on rushing with them.

Visit the State Fairgrounds, patrolled by St. Paul’s famous guard moose, and blessed with sweeping mountain views, a cool ocean breeze, and a real, live, active volcano.

And of course, what would a trip to St. Paul be without seeing some animals? The Gabbert Raptor Center is a must-see, as are the cattle barns and the horse stables.

And have you ever wondered how geothermal energy works? Well, wonder no more! Just go visit the dragon pens and meet Bessie and Buttercup, the world’s most efficient and vicious geothermal energy providers! I’m sorry to say the unicorn grazing grounds are only open to professors and grad students, but fear not, the dinosaur stables are always open to the public, and they boast an impressive 45 percent survival rate for visitors. So, put a stop there at the top of your list.

If you’re into the sportier side of the animal world, then the

NICOLE CARLSON

Animal Arena is the place for you. Come by on a Saturday evening and watch these grizzled bovines compete in a smack down that makes Fight Club look like amateur night.

Now that you’re all tired out from your day of educational exploration and fleeing for your life, why not take a load off at the St. Paul Student Center, where you can wait among the friendly, locally sourced, animatronic lizard folk, and maybe even catch a nap, lulled to sleep by their haunting whispers…Come…back…soon...to… St. Paul.

Minnesota’s Underrated Résumé the official tongue-in-cheek list of minnesota sports movies

By Johnny Tvedt Minnesota is known for a lot of things: the snow, the cold, and, of course, the electing of entertainment figures to our state government. However, the most underrated aspect of Minnesota is its influence on sports movies and television. Good grief, there are so many sports movies that have ties to our great state!

The most obvious one is The Mighty Ducks, well representing the state of hockey. The entire film was produced primarily in Edina, where floods of underprivileged hockey teams are just waiting for their ex-convict coach to deliver them into a less impoverished future. After that came Little Big League, an often forgotten ilm from 1994 about a child who becomes the owner of the Twins. Given the most recent history of the team, this doesn’t seem too far off. Beyond these ‘90s gems, there exists the brief cameo of the St. Paul Saints’ logo on Bill Murray’s hat in the 1996 outer space basketball cult classic Space Jam. This nod to the St. Paul minor league baseball team was due to Murray’s ownership of the team back when the movie was released. Even though it’s just a minor

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Good grief, there are so many sports movies that have ties to our great state! detail, it’s impressive to see our quaint state get some representation in a Michael Jordan/Looney Tunes crossover.

we’ll keep it in the Jingle All The Way format, which was also filmed in Minnesota. Or better yet, maybe an Adrian Peterson film? It starts out as a family film with a typical happy father and his cute and loving children, until we reach the second act and the plot takes a dark turn…

Adrian is actually a cyborg bent on destroying humanity.

Why stop here, though? All three of these films came out in the ‘90s and it seems time for Minnesota to renew its tradition of excellence, only this time, in an all-out fashion.

Film producers should focus their efforts on the most Jokes aside, Minnesota actually has produced quite a few Minnesotan film they could possibly spew out. How about a new hockey film? But not just any hockey film—a hockey- Oscar-worthy flicks. 1993’s Grumpy Old Men, 1996’s Fargo, and of course, Prince’s 1984 blockbuster, Purple action film. The opening scene can be something along the Rain. Though none of these are sports related, these films lines of hundreds of University students taking to the streets only heighten Minnesota’s impressive state résumé. With in order to drag the surrounding area into chaos following the holiday season upon us, it might be time to revisit their hockey loss to an unnamed college somewhere in one or two of these classics, or to at least put Jingle All New England. The second act can be your run-of-the-mill The Way at the top of everyone’s holiday movie list.

Schwarzenegger action movie, but since it’s for children,

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H ollywood Hamster an unlikely narrator of the next christmas cult classic

By Lianna Matt

After the first exclusive preview of holiday film Chestnut Stockings, the sentimentalist of the all-rookie cast, Alexa Salving, slipped two chestnuts into the palms of each member of the small film crew’s hands. “I know it’s cheesy,” Salving said, “But let’s be serious—the film is called Chestnut Stockings. We’re not ones to be immune to cheese.”

Chestnut Stockings follows the travails of 8-year-old Johnny Evergreen, played by Anders Poppen, who faces the possible nonexistence of Santa Claus by scouring the city of St. Paul to find the Salvation Army bell-ringer who is rumored to be Santa’s scout for the naughty or nice list.

Recruiting his babysitter Christine (played by Salving) the pair walk around the bustling streets, taking in the various holiday events and traditions while meeting strangers who might be more magical than they seem. The voyage is narrated by Johnny’s blunt and quirky hamster, Yojo, voiced

by Quinn Peirson, who has a front row seat to all the action via Johnny’s coat pocket.

Infused with improvisations from real life citizens, the

90-minute film has long hold-your-breath moments that leave viewers wondering what passerby will say in response to the lines spoken by a beaming Poppen and a protective Salving. “To us it shows the real, warmhearted side of the population of the Twin Cities,” movie co-producer Bruce Panchu said. “Even these strangers don’t want to ruin Johnny’s belief in Santa, in Christmas.”

Filming for Chestnut Stockings was a rushed and chaotic November with a month of coffee-driven post-editing by its crewmembers. “Most of the film’s budget went to renting a few Salvation Army buckets for the earlier scenes,” Panchu said. “That and the millions of hamster treats.”

Because the movie is only going to have a two-week release to local Twin Cities theaters—like St. Anthony Main, the Heights, and the Riverview Theater—the filmmakers were able to book theater space as longas this first showing passed the theater owners’approval. Rest assured, it did.

director Ken Tally said. “But that’s not the point. Christmas has been taken over by so many loud and obtrusive commercials. I just wanted to create something that, sure, might be unbelievable and even a little disjointed, but would make people remember the earnest magic of Christmas.”

Chestnut Stockings will play in select Twin Cities theaters from Dec. 19 through Dec. 31. Visit chestnutstockings.com for more information. Fifteen percent of all ticket sales will be donated to the Salvation Army and to Yojo’s luxury cruise to the Bahamas to recover from the cold days of filming.

“It’s not going to be a blockbuster,” writer and

Now Playing: Maple Syrup Art and Singing Communist Badgers

bedlam lowertown: home of st. paul’s most experimental, bizarre theater

By Lily Noonan “Irrational,” “fun,” “gutsy,” and “risky” are just a few common descriptors used to illustrate The Bedlam Theatre in St. Paul.

Since its establishment in 1993, and its grand reopening in St. Paul this past May, the Bedlam Theatre has been one of the most abstract, deconstructed, topsy-turvy theaters in the Twin Cities. Part theater, part restaurant, part club, and wholly insane, Bedlam Theatre’s creators will do whatever it takes to keep their art from becoming ordinary.

“Bedlam’s artistic vision involves creating a space for a wide variety of people to come and experiment with a wide variety of art,” Nico Swenson, a recent theatre graduate from the University, said. Swenson is one of several theatre arts B.A. students who began collaborating with Bedlam during his undergraduate career, and has continued

making art with the company post-graduation. “It is quickly becoming a strong meeting ground between established artists and people who are just getting into performance, as well as a meeting ground of many different styles of art-making,” Swenson said.

Bedlam is not held back by genres. It swings from provocative image theater to radical political satires, to superhero puppetry all in one season. Bedlam also hosts more than just theatrical productions; a variety of concerts take place all week. Electronica DJs, salsa and swing dancers, international artists, comedians, and local bands are some of the performers who come to make a ruckus at the Bedlam.

The theater is also fiercely inclusive. Bedlam veterans strive to welcome new artists by hosting informative

workshops to help newbies expand their creative toolbox.

Whether you’re an avid artist searching for boundarypushing performances, or a regular student looking for something offbeat to do on the weekend, there’s something at Bedlam for everyone. “It’s really nice to be involved in a space where one week I can be covering myself in syrup for a solo performance art piece, and the next be in a holiday musical with artists from all across the theatermaking spectrum,” Swenson said.

Now playing at the Bedlam Theatre is the dinner theaterstyle, avant-garde musical: Beaverdance: A Marxist Holiday Fur Trade Musical! With a title like that, how can you not be intrigued?

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Jewels of Brick-and-Mortar the historical mansions of summit avenue

By Lianna Matt

In Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice, Elizabeth Bennet and her relatives tour the wealthy and rolling estate of Darcy’s Pemberley, a common practice in the 19th century where the lower classes could see the grandeur and artistry of upper class homes. Even now in the 21st century, we have the opportunity to do the same—sort of. Nestled in St. Paul is a line of mansions that are the objects of admiration during weekly summer tours. Just steps outside would tell you that it is a bit cold for such excursions now, so instead, take a slow prowl in your heated car down the lanes of the Summit Avenue area in St. Paul.

Summit Avenue was awarded the “Nation’s Best Intact Street from Victorian Era” in 2008 when it became one of America’s ten “Great Streets” by the American Planning Association. Although the majority of these houses were built during the Victorian age, a plethora of different architectural styles run through the building designs. For instance, the 1862 Burbank-Livingston-Griggs House, included on the National Historical Register, highlights a style of architecture called Italianate. Italianate style originates from, unsurprisingly, the Italians, and it came into mod under the influence of Italian Renaissance architecture. Featuring staggered, low, and flat roofs, a tower and prominent brackets underneath its eaves, the Burbank-Livingston-Griggs House stands proudly as the second oldest home still on the avenue.

The style of a house has much to do with when it was built, according to a Summit area resident, a James J. Hill House employee, and walking tour guide Nancy Tracy.

While St. Paul residents might have preferred the Italianate style in the 1850s to 1870s, in the 1880s and the early 1890s, they moved on to the Queen Anne style. “That’s really what you think of Victorian—towers, fancy carvings, woodwork,” Tracy said.

lianna matt

“Prairie School architects took this further by creating a style influenced by the horizontal expanses of the Midwestern landscape rather than by European styles. With their more open floor plans, Prairie School houses also were designed for the daily lives of the modern American family circa 1900.”

Despite the many groups of people who fell in love with Summit Avenue’s history-on-display and want to preserve it, not everything can remain the same. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, though. “Houses along Summit Avenue have been changed in various ways to adapt to changing ways families live,” Solomonson said. “To restore or make changes While some styles seem to come under a European to existing structures, you must follow design guidelines influence—Tudor, Spanish Colonial, Georgian Revival (which, based on original construction. If you want to build a new while brought back by an interest in American colonial house, you can build a very modern, contemporary house history is derived from English architecture)—one style is as long as it fits into the design guidelines in regard to scale, distinctly American: the Prairie style. “In the late 19th massing, materials, etc. Architecture needs to change in century there was a growing interest in trying to develop order to work with new ways of living and new priorities an approach to design that seemed distinctly American, like sustainability, so houses need to adapt. There can be and there were discussions about what really constitutes a real tension with the desire to maintain the integrity of an American architecture. The Queen Anne was an English the way the building was built in the past.” style that was adapted in the United States by combining it with American colonial elements,” University of MinneWhile Solomonson supports the field of historic sota Architecture Professor Katherine Solomonson said. preservation and was involved in establishing this program

5 | DEC 8 - dec 21

at the U, she doesn’t think the buildings should be completely frozen in the past.

When Summit Avenue homeowners want to make changes to the exterior of their houses, not only do they have to get a permit from the city, but they also have to meet with St. Paul’s Heritage Preservation Committee. A subcommittee called the Design Review Committee is made up of architecture historians and other qualified people. “Usually [owners] who want to build respect the architectural integrity,” Tracy said. “You have to make it look modern but make it blend in.”

Summit Avenue is one of those unique intersections of modern day life, history, and art. Simply walking down the street is enough to make you stop and gaze at these incredible buildings. Each house is adorned with a touch of whimsy, a foundation of stateliness, or both. You feel that emanate from the buildings whether you know all of the architectural background or not. This winter, take a break from suburbia and swing down to Summit Avenue for an afternoon. Not only will you fall in love with all the houses,but also, if you stop by the James J. Hill House, you’ll learn the story of the largest mansion on Summit Avenue and its owner.

bizarro

Y oung Minds and Hmong Hearts the hmong youth population is at an all-time high in the twin cities

By Lily Noonan Among the abyss of immigrants in the Twin Cities, the Hmong population is on the rise. There is has been a 30 percent increase in the Hmong population since 2000, and about 65,000 Hmong Americans are currently living in the Twin Cities—most of them in St. Paul. The Hmong population here is primarily comprised of youth who have a heavy weight on their shoulders—carrying on their deeply traditional culture, while also integrating with American societal norms.

A dilemma within the Hmong community is conflict between ideological allegiance to Hmong family or clan vs. the American idea of individual freedom. University sophomore and Hmong American Yang identifies with these struggles in the Hmong community. “My parents have never gone to college, like most Hmong elders. So this journey of education in America is a system that is very new to them,” Yang said.

She says that either Hmong children do not speak fluent Hmong and have a difficult time communicating with their parents, or they have difficulty learning English. The language barriers strain parent-youth relations and contribute to Hmong youth confusion. “As Hmong youths are undergoing Americanization, there is definitely a vivid line that separates the youths from the elders because many nowadays do not fluently speak Hmong,” Yang said.

However, some Hmong parents have become more

lenient, Yang said. The relationship tension has eased largely due to the parent programs that have been implemented in Hmong charter schools. Parent programs have been some of the most effective tactics to aid parent-child relationships and help Hmong parents understand how to be successful in America, according to Yang. These programs bridge the barriers between the child’s independent education and the values of their parents. They facilitate a healthier dialogue so that Hmong parents are able to understand and accommodate their children’s aspirations.

While Hmong parents and elders are able to learn about American culture and take classes to gain American citizenship, Hmong children are able to learn Hmong in an academic setting. Yang applauds the U for allowing students to take Hmong as a language course. “What I really admire is the fact that some schools in the Twin Cities have incorporated Hmong as a language that many can study,” she said. Yang says it helps Hmong students learn their parents’ language and strengthen their relationship.

But the emergence of Hmong traditions goes beyond the classroom. The Twin Cities has become vibrant with Hmong culture. The Hmong New Year, a massive celebration towards the end of November, has been typically held at the Metrodome, drawing over 15,000 attendees. Hmong shamans are now able to practice traditional spiritual healing in Twin Cities hospitals when

a Hmong elder is sick. Blong Yang was the first Hmong American to join the Minneapolis City Council. Yang looks to to improve the livelihood of the ever-adapting Hmong population, especially in northern Minneapolis and St. Paul.

Hmong women are becoming vocal about inequality between men and women in their traditional community, according to Yang. “Hmong daughters are usually raised to become a great housewife for their future husband and his family,” she said. “With this lifestyle, it’s very difficult for Hmong daughters to excel in their academics.

Hmong boys are usually favored more.”

HWAT (Hmong Women Achieving Together) is a Twin Cities nonprofit formed in 1998 to help Hmong women and girls combat sexism within the Hmong community and provide support and leadership opportunities. Their mission statement: “We envision a world where Hmong women and girls are valued and supported to achieve highest potential in all of their roles. We see a society that honors choices Hmong women make and celebrates their ability to direct their own destinies.”

Minneapolis has several nonprofits dedicated to the welfare of Hmong, specifically Hmong youth. Yang’s favorite Hmong nonprofit is Center for Hmong Arts and Talents (CHAT).

“CHAT is a very popular and special Hmong nonprofit in St. Paul that strives to inspire the artist in Hmong youths —whether it’s by writing, singing, playing instruments, creating music, painting, or drawing,” Yang said. “They offer many programs for Hmong youths to discover their inner self through art, and inspire them to become positive leaders within the Hmong community.”

While Yang and many young Hmong people are becoming more progressive, they still embrace the wisdom of their parents and elders. “There’s this famous and important phrase that’s remembered and emphasized throughout the Hmong Community,” Yang said, summarizing her culture’s beliefs. “‘Hmoob yuav tsum hlub Hmoob,’ or paraphrased, Hmong people should love each other, because our people carry a very heavy history behind us that has led us to become an ethnicity without a country that we can claim as our own.”

lizzie goncharova

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K ick The Connector top alternative ways to travel to st. paul campus

By Lauren Cutshall Is it just me, or does there seem to be a lot of dull stares and half-open eyes on the connector these days?

Between cynical people just waiting to roll their eyes at something and an abundance of already-tired-of-winter people, the connector just isn’t where I want to be when going to St. Paul. Have no fear! Here are some of the best alternative ways to get to your St. Paul classes.

Slackline Approximate travel time: 3 hours (5+ if it’s your first time slacklining) There are plenty of trees between Minneapolis and St. Paul, so you shouldn’t have any problems slacklining your way there. As long as you are properly tying your slacklines and making sure no trees are harmed in the making, getting to St. Paul should be a breeze.

Do the Worm Approximate travel time: 2 hours They say practice makes perfect, so what better way to practice your breakdancing skills than do them all the way to St. Paul? You won’t ever have to go to the gym because you’ll be ripped and have the world’s greatest six-pack.

Steal a Segway from a Rosedale Mall Cop Approximate travel time: 30 minutes (but allow for another 1.5 hours to steal the segway initially)

Dig your own Gopher Way Approximate travel time: 7 hours We all know that we want to use the Gopher Way tunnels more than we do. We also all know that we get lost in them, despite the signs that are up. And we all know that there should be a tunnel from Minneapolis to St. Paul.

Tunnel digging helpful hint: I hear there’s some loose rock behind a Rita Hayworth poster in the basement of Coffman Union... start there!

Marty-McFly It Approximate travel time: 25 minutes Grab your skateboard (or hoverboard) and hold on tight, because you are about to grab hold of the nearest campus connector and let the bus do the rest. As long as the connectors are running, you can always Marty-McFly it.

Ride Mudonna— the St. Paul Saint’s pig mascot Approximate travel time: 45 minutes Mudonna, if you aren’t familiar, is the most frightening and yet well-meaning pig mascot you will ever meet. Surely Mudonna will give you a ride to campus each day.

Or, while you’re at it, follow a herd of cows to the homeland Approximate travel time: 30 minutes if Bessie is leading the herd, 45 if it’s Bertha

Don’t try to tell me that you don’t already feel like one of the herd when you shuffle onto the connector with 30 other people to be shifted around inside until you arrive in St. Paul 20 minutes later. Just make sure the cows don’t go up any stairs. Then you’ll be on your own.

Follow at the back of an admissions tour Approximate travel time: 1 hour When following, make sure to shout lots of advice from the back. After every piece of advice, shout “#PROTIP!” When the tour guide cracks an awful joke, follow with “Bah-dum-tshh” and a painfully obvious wink. If parents seem confused, nudge them and continue to say “Get it?

Get it?” until they understand.

Roller-skade your way there Approximate travel time: 27 minutes, 6 seconds, 42 milliseconds Roller-skading is when you put a inline rollerblade on one foot and a classic roller-skate on the other. For an extra challenge, try doing it Roller-Derby style with your closest friends (or, if you’re good, your enemies).

PedalPub it!

Approximate travel time: 30 minutes Honestly, a cold beer and your morning workout is the only way to get through a Friday 8 a.m. class in St. Paul.

Come on. You know you’ve always wanted to try out a Segway. You thought they were dumb, but you secretly always wanted to try it for yourself. Don’t worry about looking silly now, because you’re not riding just any Segway—but a stolen Segway. Lean yourself all the way to St. Paul and you’ve just earned yourself six badass points.

Go around like a lost State Fair fan, asking strangers where to go Approximate travel time: It depends entirely on the people you ask for directions Make sure you ask valid State Fair questions, like “Where can I get Fair Hair?” and “Can you help me find gator on a stick?” or “Will Belinda be at the Kare 11 Barn today?”

Make sure that you follow their directions to the State Fair Grounds, also known as the “St. Paul Campus’ druggie neighbor” for 50 weeks out of year.

Crabwalk it Approximate travel time: Depends on how long it takes for your arms/legs/back to give out on you You. Will. Build. So. Many. Muscles.

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AMAR HASSHIM

the wake student magazine | bizarro issue Young Minds and Hmong Hearts PG. 4 Mansions of Summit Avenue PG. 5 Hollywood Hamster PG. 6 Raptors and Dragons and Moose, Oh My! PG. 7

editorial: Editor-in-Chief Grace Birnstengel Managing Editor Lauren Cutshall Cities Editor Emily Mongan Voices Editor Kayla McCombs Sound & Vision Editors Alex Nelson, Sam Schaust

Art Directors Lizzie Goncharova, Max Smith Copy Editors Sara Glesne, Lindsey Pastrorek Editorial Interns Lianna Matt, Johnny Tvedt, Shawna Stennes, Olivia Riley

Head Designer Kate Johnston Graphic Designers Amanda Gentle, Kayla Lutteke, Erin Slayton Web Manager Sam Gordon Finance Manager Ben Larwa

Production Interns Kirsten Erickson, Alexa Orak, Carter Gruss

this issue: Cover Image: Grace Birnstengel Photographers: Lianna Matt, Shawnna Stennes Illustrators: Amar Hasshim, Lizzie Goncharova, Nicole Carlson, Cera Sylar, Meagan Marsh, Breck Hickman Contributing Writers: Lauren Cutshall, Karl Witkowiak, Lianna Matt, Lilly Noonan, Olivia Riley, Johnny Tvedt, Aron Wolde, Grace Birnstengel, Shawnna Stennes, Kevin Beckman

George W. Bush Born in St. Paul PG. 10

Granny Donuts PG. 11

Hello, dear readers, and thank you for picking up this St. Paul-themed issue of The Wake Magazine!

When the Wakies came to my office asking for my Art Interns blessing to St. Paul-ify The Wake, I was thrilled. Not only Cera Nelson, Andrew Tomten, Olivia Novotny, Breanna Vick, because this is exactly the kind of recognition and publicity St. Paul needs, but also because no one had talked to Breck Hickman me in the three days prior to the pitch for this issue.

Faculty Advisor Shayla Thiel-Stern Now we love our twin, Minneapolis, but some people forget that St. Paul—the capitol of Minnesota—has just as much to offer as our neighbor does. Sure, Minneapolis has the Target Center, but St. Paul has the Xcel Energy Center. Sure, Minneapolis has The Replacements, but Public Relations/ Advertising Manager St. Paul has that time The Replacements played here.

Jennifer Burns And sure, Minneapolis has the Walker Art Center and the Sculpture Gardens, but St. Paul has a three-legged Social Media Manager dog named Walker who lives behind a gas station.

Abby Richardson Distributors Ryan Condron, Chris Roebber

An Exhibit of an Age PG. 9

letter from the editor

production Executive Director Kelcie McKenney

St. Paul: Home of Jamaican Death Metal PG. 8

Of course, I wish that all 24 pages of this magazine were St. Paul-themed, and not just half of them, but here in St. Paul—we’re used to sharing the spotlight.

©2014 The Wake Student Magazine.

All Rights Reserved.

Established in 2002, The Wake is a fortnightly independent magazine and registered student organization produced by and for students at the University of Minnesota.

The Wake Student Magazine 126 Coffman Memorial Union 300 Washington Avenue SE Minneapolis, MN 55455 The Wake was founded by Chrin Ruen & James DeLong.

FACEBOOK.COM/MAYORCHRISCOLEMAN

So thanks again to The Wake, the University of Minnesota (specifically the St. Paul campus), and all of you loyal Wake readers. Enjoy this issue while slurping a malt from Mickey’s Diner, while sitting on a bench in the beautiful Mears Park downtown, or while crying in a dark corner about how lonely and unappreciated you are.

See you in St. Paul, Mayor Chris Coleman

Disclaimer: The purpose of The Wake is to provide a forum in which students can voice their opinions. Opinions expressed in the magazine are not representative of the publication or university as a whole. To join the conversation email gbirnstengel@wakemag.org.

www.wakemag.org facebook.com/thewakemagazine @the_wake wake-mag.tumblr.com

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ll 2014 Raptors and Dragons and Moose, Oh My! PG. 7 George W. Bush: Bo rn in St. Paul PG. 10