Today's Woman November 2011
Merrier and BrighterThe holiday season is one of the most highly anticipated and cherished seasons of year, but for some of us, escaping the stress is impossible. So open this issue, sit back, and read about how to enjoy the season and lighten your load. Writer Melissa Donald talks to Chef Mary Wheatley about planning your Thanksgiving meal in advance (page 12) and Lauren Williams meets with florists who have flowers that bring holiday cheer (page 46). We highlight some books you can give as gifts for yourself or others. Oh, and if you hate wrapping gifts, we’ll introduce you to a woman who can make your life much easier (page 10). Sit back, relax and let us help you put the thankful into your November, the merry back into Christmas, and the cheer into all of your holiday celebrations.
NOVEMBER 2011 P o w e r � S t y l e � W e l l n e s s � C t i o n s Insider tips Are you too stressed? Kick up your Heels for the Holidays! ~ Best Books for Gift-Giving~ www.iamtodayswoman.com 2011 NOVEMBER 3 about This Issue By aNITa OldhaM 8 Contents November 2011 articles Power I am Today's Woman 10 By lucy PRITchETT Survival SkillS: Niche Marketing 12 By JENNIfER ThOMPsON an Insider's holiday cooking Guide 14 By MElIssa dONald holiday decorating By MEGaN sEckMaN 16 48 19 Things 18 24 By aNITa OldhaM Women Bettering Our small World By caThy ZION STYLe Party dress! 28 By aNITa OldhaM aNd TIffaNy WhITE I love My By lucy PRITchETT 34 a Journey down the aisle By lauREN WIllIaMs 44 58 13 Inspirations By hOlly GREGOR 46 48 decorating with flowers By lauREN WIllIaMs weLLNeSS Tis the season...to be stressed By chERyl sTuck 54 58 The hunt for the Perfect salad By MElIssa dONald 28 a dose of Reality By BOB MuEllER 60 12 CoNNeCTIoNS 4 Things Not to Miss By TIffaNy WhITE Arthritis Arthritis And OrthOpedic supplement Living With 62 By GIOIa PaTTON artS inSider MuSt-See: sue Grafton 64 cookie Mania 66 68 By caRMEN BROWN ROLL with PUNCHES Dodge Emotional Blows Help Her Stay in the Ring Knock Out Pain the Books Recommended for holiday Gifts By aNGEla BOGGs Just ask Joyce 72 74 By JOycE OGlEsBy arthritis and Orthopedic supplement 35 real or Fake: designer handbags By TIffaNy WhITE 6 NOVEMBER 2011 TOday's WOMaN Cover On Our Volume 21 8 Number 11 About This Issue Merrier and Brighter o The holiday season is one of the most highly anticipated and cherished seasons of year, but for some of us, escaping the stress is impossible. So open this issue, sit back, and read about how to enjoy the season and lighten your load. Writer Melissa Donald talks to Chef Mary Wheatley about planning your Thanksgiving meal in advance (page 14) and Lauren Williams meets with florists who have flowers that bring holiday cheer (page 48). We highlight some books you can give as gifts for yourself or others. Oh, and if you hate wrapping gifts, we'll introduce you to a woman who can make your life much easier (page 12). Sit back, relax and let us help you put the thankful into your November, the merry back into Christmas, and the cheer into all of your holiday celebrations. -- Anita Oldham reating happy memories with family and friends during the holiday season is Tatiana Collins's most treasured gift. Each year, she and her family take a photo in front of their decorated tree then use the image to make Christmas cards. "Every holiday at our home is a huge celebration." Flip to page 28 to see more of Tatiana and our other models pictured in this month's style feature. C -- Tiffany White Photo by Chet White. Makeup by Isidro Valencia. Hair by Christine Davis of Blades Salon. o Call Jacklyn, (502) 327-8855, ext. 10, or email us at email@example.com with details and specifics. For advertising information in Today's Woman, call (502) 327-8855. Today's Woman Zion Publications llc 9750 Ormsby station Road, suite 307, louisville, ky 40223 Phone: (502) 327-8855 � fax: (502) 327-8861 www.iamtodayswoman.com RepRInts ARe AvAIlAble! BBB RaTING Of is published monthly by: subscriptions are available by sending $18 to the above address for 12 monthly issues. Today's Woman magazine is published monthly by Zion Publications llc and distributed free to the people of metropolitan louisville and southern Indiana. circulation 50,000 guaranteed. The opinions expressed herein are exclusively those of the writers and do not necessarily reflect the position of the publisher. Today's Woman magazine does not endorse or guarantee any advertiser's product or service. copyright 2011 by Zion Publications llc with all rights reserved. Reproduction or use of editorial or graphic content in any manner is prohibited without permission from Zion Publications llc. 8 NOVEMBER 2011 TOday's WOMaN www.iamtodayswoman.com 2011 NOVEMBER 9 " I AM TODAY'S WOMAN Design can be used as a vehicle for social change. by Lucy M. Pritchett / Photo: MeLissa donaLd WebSiTe: www.anchalproject.org Neighborhood: Fisherville, Ky. Age: 26 Colleen Clines ~ co-founder and director of Anchal Project; LiFe Zone coordinator of Louisville Metro The goods: Some 35 women create handmade quilts, pillows, and pouches made from recycled cotton saris. In addition to their wages, the women have access to educational workshops and health care. We provide seed funding, design guidance, and access to Western markets. The items range in price from $8 for a pouch to $160-$200 for a quilt. Anchal Project: It was founded in March 2009. I was in graduate school at Rhode Island School of Design and took a course in India that explored design in the developing world. Anchal, which refers to the decorated edge of a sari used to protect or comfort loved ones, grew out of that experience. We partnered with an existing organization, New Light, in Kolkata, India, to help commercial sex workers by providing an alternate means of income to help break the cycle of prostitution in families among the daughters. Blogs she follows: For design, it is www.publicinterestdesign.org and for art, I check out www.thisiscolossal.com Favorite accessory: A scarf. Gourmet treat: Pet Peeve: Macaroons from Ladur�e in Paris. Works in: Surprised her: I have been to India three times. I am inspired by its culture and the people are very welcoming. But, the poverty is unbelievable. And a trip to the red-light district was eye-opening. Girls as young as 12 years old are either sold or forced into the sex trade. That design can be used as a vehicle for social change. My degree is in landscape architecture and in addition to the changes that I see resulting from Anchal Project, I am interested in urban design -- parks, plazas, urban spaces between buildings, and how food can be grown in public places. Believes: Four time zones. My co-founder and partner Devon Miller lives in San Francisco. Our marketing intern lives in Austin, Tx. I am in Kentucky and of course, Anchal's project manager is in India. Picky eaters...people who won't try a new food. And, bad foundational planting. So many plants. You don't need little balls of green around your house. Just read: Favorite vegetable: In five to 10 years: This Side of Paradise by F. Scott Fitzgerald. My favorite book is The Count of Monte Cristo. I mostly read the classics. You know, the books you were forced to read in school. Now I really enjoy them. Kale. I love to make kale salads. I would like to start a collaborative firm of artists and landscape designers focusing on combating social and environmental injustice. Anchal Project will hold a trunk show at Sacred Heart Academy on November 12 from 10am-2pm. On her playlist: Loves about Louisville: Olmsted Parks. The parks are a huge part of Louisville and we sometimes take them for granted Indie folk bands. Dark, Dark, Dark. I also love to dance, so I listen to Animal Collective. And classic rock... Jimi Hendrix, the Allman Brothers. 10 NOVEMBER 2011 TODAY'S WOMAN Survival Skills: Niche Marketing Amy Holley M by Jennifer Thompson gift-giving. Amy has begun to work with companies to create signature gift wrapping (think Tiffany's blue jewelry box with a white bow) to help build customer and employee loyalty. ost of us see gift wrapping as the final chore at the end of the long journey of holiday shopping. For Amy Holley, though, gift wrapping is not only a creative outlet, but also a growing business now entering its third holiday season. "HolleyWraps" is Amy's gift wrapping service that has grown to include personal shopping for individuals and companies, but Amy says that no matter how big or small the gift, presentation is still half of what makes a good gift even better. Just in time for holiday shopping, Amy shares her survival skills for how to find (and give!) the perfect gift. Rule #1: Find your niche. As a hospital laboratory researcher, Amy had little opportunity to express her creative side, and so in the mid-2000s, Amy started taking classes on how to run her own business. She had drawn up plans for a wine and chocolate bar, but when the economy took a turn for the worse in 2008, she decided it wasn't the best time to try a business after all. However, during the holiday season of 2008, some friends asked her to wrap gifts for them, and Amy decided to take out a small newspaper ad since this business "didn't cost much to try." Since her home is conveniently located in the Highlands, Amy quickly accumulated some holiday shopping clients (mostly men shopping for their wives and mothers) and found the creative outlet she had been looking for. "I always loved decorating, and with gift wrapping, I like to put together different colors and patterns to create different looks. I even like the feel of paper," Amy says. Amy calls her style of wrapping "ecoelegant," meaning that her beautiful giftwrapping does not come at the cost of environmental waste. Amy wraps the top and bottom of each box separately so that the box can be reused, and she always tries to use living things, such as fresh flowers or holly, to finish off a package. "I wrap with a clean conscious," she says. At her house, Amy has even found a way to economize her decorating by strategically placing her colorful gift boxes throughout the house to give it the holiday spirit. Over the years, she has developed an individual color scheme for each family member. When it's time to unwrap presents, they can go throughout the house to pick out their color-coded gifts. "It saves time, and I don't have to store as many decorations every year," Amy says. Rule #3: Regifting (boxes) is encouraged. To contact Amy about her gifting and gift wrapping services, call 502.797.2227 or e-mail firstname.lastname@example.org. Amy will be offering gift wrapping classes on November 8 and 22, location and time TBD. 12 photo: Melissa Don Rule #2: Make gift-giving an experience. Amy says she has always loved the look on people's faces when they're given a gift, and her goal with every package is to recreate the feeling of coming downstairs as a child to see the pile of presents that has magically appeared under the tree. "Santa Claus is a tough act to follow," Amy admits. Amy says that a beautifully presented gift "brings out a different side of people. It makes them feel special, like the gift giver really put some extra thought into it," she says. "It touches people of all ages -- men and women. When you hand someone -- anyone -- a beautifully wrapped package, time just stops, and the look on their face -- it's like they've just won the Miss America pageant." Presentation also matters outside of the holidays and personal NOVEMBER 2011 When Amy helps people pick out gifts for their loved ones, she encourages them to think about specific memories or times they have spent with the other person--a book or movie they both enjoyed, a cause or a sport they both support, or a special time they shared. "The thought really does count. They'll realize you thought about them and took the time to find the thing you thought of," she says. Even with less personal gifts such as with her business clients, Amy encourages them to think about "things that people actually want," and she spends her downtime throughout the year contacting vendors and visiting craft fairs or markets to expand her gift line. "I buy local as much as possible," Amy says. "Someone might not have heard of Coco's Chocolate Caf�, but if you give them a gift with Coco's packaging, they not only get chocolate, but a new place in town they can go visit and enjoy." alD Rule #4: Make the thought count. TODAY'S WOMAN An Insider's Holiday Cooking Guide story and photos By Melissa donald Holiday Baking Timeline I recently ate the very best turkey I ever tasted: it was juicy, flavorful, and tender and was prepared by mary Wheatley of Cook With mary. I am excited to share with you some of mary's holiday cooking tips, along with some of her favorite holiday recipes and tips for getting things right. 14 Here is what mary calls her turkey timeline, a guide to preparing some of your holiday favorites well in advance. 3 months in advance: � Prepare and freeze piecrust. Form into discs and wrap individually, and then place in a freezer bag. 2 � � � months in advance: Roasted Acorn Squash Soup Cornbread Stuffing -- unbaked Turkey Gravy Preparations 2 days in advance: � Blanch and shock Broccoli for Broccoli and Cheese Casserole -- Store in Refrigerator � Blanch and shock Brussels Sprouts for salad -- Store in Refrigerator � Chocolate Mousse Cake -- Cover and store in Refrigerator Preparations 1 day in advance: � Thaw in refrigerator: all frozen items 24 hours in advance. � Peel and chunk potatoes (both white and sweet potatoes). � Prepare brine for the turkey and place in a large container and store in the refrigerator or in a large cooler. If storing in a cooler, you must keep adding ice to insure that the brine is below 40 degrees Fahrenheit. Store in brine between 8-24 hours. 1 month in advance: � Apple Walnut Cake -- without the maple drizzle � Baked Rolls and Breads Preparations 1.5 weeks in advance: Shop for all non-perishable goods Preparations 5 days in advance: � Shop for remaining items and perishable goods � Cranberry Relish � Thaw Turkey (in refrigerator) � Slice Shallots for Brussels Sprouts Salad (see recipe on page 58) � Crush cookies for Chocolate Mousse Cake -- store in airtight container novemBeR 2011 Today's Woman Preparing a Turkey for Roasting Thaw turkey in the refrigerator for approximately 3 days. Sanitize the kitchen sink by scrubbing it with detergent and a scouring pad. Rinse thoroughly. Rinse the turkey under cold water, removing the packets in both cavities. Dry the turkey with paper towels. If desired, submerge the turkey in a prepared brine, and leave, chilled for 8-24 hours. Make a brine for the turkey by bringing 12 cups water, 3 cup kosher salt, 1� cup sugar, � cup black pepper to a boil. Add in 3-4 Tbsp of loose tea (optional) and steep for 30 minutes. Add about 12 cups of ice to chill the brine to less than 40 degrees. Add a 16 pound turkey and chill for 8-24 hours. Drain, discarding the brine. When ready to roast the turkey, quarter a large apple, a large onion, and cut 3-4 ribs of celery into 3-4-inch lengths. Stuff these items into a large cavity along with a handful of fresh herbs such as thyme, rosemary, and sage. Rub the outside of the bird with butter or olive oil and sprinkle with salt and pepper. If you are not going to roast the turkey immediately, return the prepared bird back in the refrigerator until you are ready to bake. Thoroughly wash hands and re-sanitize the sink. Bake at 350 degrees until the turkey tests done. When the turkey is done, the internal temperature should register 160 degrees on an instant read thermometer, and the juices should run clear. Check the temperature in several places. Tips On Preparing These Holiday Favorites Pie Crust: Make sure you roll out dough that has been chilled. When crimping the edge of a crust for a pumpkin pie with a pecan praline topping, make sure your crimped edge is 1" above the lip of the pie plate. This will ensure that your pie will not flow over the edge when baking. Cornbread stuffing: Bake cornbread in a square or rectangular baking pan. Once cooled, cut bread in pan into cubes and turn out onto a cookie sheet. Cutting the bread into cubes makes the bread dry faster in the oven, which in turn, absorbs more moisture when adding liquid to create the stuffing. blanCh and shoCk Vegetables: Bring a pot of water to a boil and add the broccoli. Boil for about 2-3 minutes or until the broccoli turns a bright green. Remove broccoli immediately with a slotted spoon into a bowl of ice water. Chill and then add broccoli to a casserole dish to assemble the rest of the ingredients. Use the same water for the Brussels Sprouts. Bring water to a boil and cook for 2-3 minutes or until Brussels Sprouts turn a bright green. Also remove with a slotted spoon into a bowl of ice water. Place in a bowl and set aside for salad (see salad article on page 56). seParating Pomegranates: Separate the seeds by submerging half a pomegranate at a time in a bowl of water. This will eliminate the probability of the juice splattering and staining your clothes. The seeds, once separated from the pith, will settle in the bottom of the bowl. Drain when ready to use. Potatoes: If preparing a day ahead of time, store peeled and chunked uncooked potatoes in a container with water and store in the refrigerator. turkey: Once the turkey is patted dry and the butter and salt is added to the outside, place the turkey breast side down on a bed of vegetables and herbs, such as celery and an assortment of fresh herbs (thyme, rosemary, sage, etc.) for the first half of the roasting process. Half way through, remove the turkey from the oven and turn the turkey over. Salt the top and place back in the oven. But starting with the turkey breast side down is what makes this turkey super juicy and tender. CliCk here for additional online-only reCiPes mary Wheatley along with friends and family gather around the holiday table for a lovely, festive meal. 2011 NovemBeR 15 n eYour HoliDaY Decorating sh re p F U By Megan seckMan hether your holiday decor tends to lean toward the excess of the Griswolds or the minimalism of the Cratchits, this season, there seems to be something for everyone. Even if you are on a Scrooge-style budget or have the enthusiasm of the Grinch, holiday decorating this year can be painless and affordable. You know who you are, hoarders of outdated bubblelights and icicles, take some advice from these local designers and make your own Christmas Story. W Some Natural With the Glitter Two words this year: French Laundry. Not to be confused with Dirty Laundry, this subdued, relaxed style incorporates natural fabrics such as cotton, linen, jute, and burlap. The mixture of textures contrasts nicely with the organic, neutral palette of ivories, khakis, chartreuse, and accents of red or black for the "pop." "You will see a mix of the French Laundry look in the French writing-inspired ribbons as well as ribbons made from embroidered burlap," Lisa Bizzell, Tassels designer, said. Bizzell assured that this look is easy to incorporate into existing decor as the mix between the glittery, shiny ornaments we've saved for years and the natural, understated ribbons provides a striking contrast. Bizzell said the classic reds and greens are also en vogue this year (how original), so no need to start from scratch. So how does one get this look of comfort and neutrality? While choosing ribbons, stockings and ornaments, think of a sunny, breezy French hillside and choose bright, natural colors. This can be accomplished on a budget by making stockings or a tree skirt out of a burlap sack or purchasing script-adorned ribbons and integrating them around the house. Include functional, rustic ornaments such as antique clothes pins, exposed upholstery or adorn the tree with small picture frames filled with memories from Christmases of the Past matted with a monochromatic color scheme. For the lover of Louisville, the always popular fleur-de-lis is a perfect fit for this look. Designer secret from Bizzell: Hot-glue the top of your prized ornaments to the ornament to decrease breakage or better yet, buy elaborate plastic ornaments and they never break. photo: Melissa DonalD Tassels designed tree shows a mixture of sparkle with more natural elements. and on towels for gift and decorating gifts this holiday season. The less shrewd but more decadent cupcake trend has, according to Stege, "...become a cultural phenomenon over the last couple of years and we do not see an end to the interest. We will have lots and lots of yummy looking ornaments in a variety of `flavors'." Eyedia always does a lovely job of supporting the local look and this year there will be no shortage of items special to the Louisville community. The ever-popular fleur-de-lis will be accompanied with another local bird, the Cardinal. Cardinals, like the owl, will appear on a host of places from dishes to stocking holders. On what color scheme should I showcase my owls, cardinals, and cupcakes? Well, with the classic red and green of course. "We are finding that the `design gurus' who set the styles at market are embracing the themes of years gone by and are going back to using lots of red and green this season," Stege said. When in doubt, make Christmas the way you remember it (except maybe minus those bubble lights and the Christmas cardigan). No matter what, It's a Wonderful Life so go forth and decorate. TODAY'S WOMAN Retro Trends At eyedia, the motto is "design it again" and that is definitely what we will be seeing this year. "We have found that our customers are very interested in recreating some of their childhood memories and traditions. This trend certainly supports our mission of re-use, re-invent, and re-cycle. I think people, in general more than ever, are deriving comfort and stability from the traditions of the past," according to eyedia co-owner Diane Stege, This year, expect to see two beloved retro trends: the owl and the cupcake. Owls are simply everywhere -- on tee-shirts, earrings, lamps, and yes, where they belong -- on the tree. Expect to see owls galore in the form of ornaments, figurines, 16 NOVEMBER 2011 1 2 JuLY 2010 u se Paperwallet 19 w e ar e1 9y e ar s ol d! Happenings, news, celebrations, and tidbits that caught Today's Woman's eye this month. things 20th Anniversary Issue: Coming December 2011 Put your money into art -- literally. about $20 each. www.paperwallet.com W ToDAy 's Charla s i o n e c t o n n � C e s s l l n W e e � t y l � S e r P o w oman 9? W hy 1 B ec a 3 by ANITA OldhAm Special Stories, Special Events, Special Prizes www.facebook.com/todayswomanmagazine Ohhh. Chocolate EXPOSED A WomAn king "My drin became m." a proble ReveAlS: e The Spy ISSu s, and Un s, Mysterie Confession -CoverUps Former Today's Woman cover model Charla Young will host a new weekly talk show, Power to Change, beginning January 2012. She had her inaugural taping at the Muhammad Ali Center. The Kentucky Derby Festival 2012 Christopher Radko ornament, titled "Fleurde-Liberty" "Fleur-de-Liberty" is available at the Kentucky Derby Festival Office at 1001 South Third Street, Louisville, 502.584.6383, or on the Festival's website at www.kdf.org. Each ornament retails at $60.00. 18 NOVEMBER 2011 5 6 A sample of gourmet chocolates from Ghyslain on Market. Something to be thankful for � a stop at Ghyslain on Market for a chocolate sculpture demonstration -- over three feet of chocolate -- by chef Ghyslain Maurais on November 20 from 4 to 6pm. 4 o PAGE 20 You might want to pack this for your holiday travels. Poo~Pourri's new line of toilet deodorizers stops embarrassing odors before they leave the bowl. The before-yougo toilet bowl sprays neutralize bathroom embarrassments before they happen. Thanks to Poo Pourri's secret formula of natural essential oils, they can eliminate even the toughest of smells.simply spray the bowl before you go and no one else will ever know. www.poopourri.com TOday's WOMaN www.iamtodayswoman.com 2011 NOVEMBER 19 7 PAGE 18 Jezebel website creator in louisville Anna Holmes, writer, editor and creator of the women's website Jezebel, will be speaking at the Women's Center 9th annual Elizabeth Cady Stanton luncheon November 16. Her topic will be Gender Politics, Pop Culture and Progressive Change on the Web. Much of the emphasis of the talk will focus on how Holmes conceived of and executed Jezebel. The lunch will be 11:30am-1pm at the University Club, Belknap Campus. Tickets are $25 per person and must be purchased by November 9. Call the Women's Center at 502.852.8976. o 8 Can't Wait to Go Sledding! Whether or not the snow falls from the sky, you can head with me to Cardinal stadium for an eight-lane tubing snow hill. snow Ball Park will feature the snowMagic system, the world's first temperature independent snow making system. The park, which is more than just tubing, will be operating November 25 through January 16 with admission fees ranging from $8 to $15. Tickets at the Kentucky Exposition Center, KFC yum! Center and Kentucky International Convention Center. Ticket Offices and all Ticketmaster outlets. www.snowballpark.com. 13 20 NOVEMBER Women 4 Women hired Gwen Cooper as Executive Director. She was previously the president and CEO of Community Health Charities of Florida. drop in and get some crafting done at the Kentucky Museum of art and Craft, located at 715 W. Main street, $6 Crafty Saturdays Kite-Making Drop-in Workshop November 12, 11am-12:30pm Ornament Making Drop-in Workshop december 10, 11am-12:30pm 2011 Get your high school kid writing. Maybe he or she can win the $1,000 from Filson Historical Society's High School Essay Contest. This year's contest asks high school students to explore and analyze one story, event, or person of significance in the region's history. Much more information can be found at www.filsonhistorical.org, but hurry, because the deadline is December 2, 2011. 9 10 11 12 Christie Leigh Mueller, our I Am Today's Woman from February, recently wrote a book about football for women called Gridiron Belles. www.gridironbelles.com The 2011 Jewish Festival of the Book Lisa Baron: Life of the Party: a Political Press Tart Bares all november 2 � 7pm at the Jewish Community Center, $8 Jane PorTnoy: a Jewish Calendar of Festive Foods november 6 � 2pm at a private home, $25 Written by ex-Louisvillians Jane Portnoy and former adath Jeshurun Cantor Marshall Portnoy, and illustrated by Louisvillian robin reikes MeLissa Faye Greene: no Biking in the House Without a Helmet november 8 � 7pm at the Jewish Community Center, $8 The False Friend november 9 � 7pm at the Jewish Community Center, $8 LoCaL auTHors' readinG MyLa GoLdBerG: november 16 � 7pm at The Bard's Town, Free Contact: 502.459.0660, www.jewishlouisville.org/bookfest TOday's WOMaN o PAGE 22 www.iamtodayswoman.com 2011 NOVEMBER 21 14 15 PAGE 20 o We broke a few rules ourselves In our fashion feature, Be a Rebel, in the Break the Rules themed October issue, we showed you how to dress for the office, but we didn't actually tell you the right place to find that clothing. So, now, you know that you need to head to Rodeo Drive for most of the clothing. Nicole Miller dress, $330; Robbi & Nikki fur vest, $295; short necklace, $68; long necklace, $73; bracelet, $64, All available at Rodeo Drive, 2212 Holiday Manor Ctr. #C, 502.425.8999. Jessica Simpson shoes, $89, available at Dillard's, 5000 Shelbyville Road 502.893.4400. Hue tights, $18, available at Macy's, 502.423.3000. Ann Taylor earrings, $38. 18 22 Become part of Today's Family Every Day. It is a website where we can discuss all kinds of things about family life right here in Kentucky and Indiana. As part of our kickoff, you have a chance every day to win great prizes. www.todaysfamilyeveryday.com The Christmas Village with Snow Fairy Castle is being built right now: The English charm of this elf-size village creation is built so children can peek directly inside and see Christmas preparations in the making. 16 the Galt House Hotel, November Christmas at 2, includes KaLightoscope; a brand 17-January new Christmas Village with Snow Fairy Castle Success for Future Success Today's Woman Assistant Editor, Tiffany White, and Rhonda Jones. Mary Elizabeth Embry, Jennifer Roberts, Jennifer Foster, Leigh Pittman, Andrea Overton Cherena Fox Laura Spalding 17 QR Code attraction; a new KaLightoscope learning center; a life-size gingerbread castle; a gingerbread house contest; `Colors of the Season' Holiday Show by Gary Musick Products of Nashville; Breakfast and Story Time with Santa; "Help Santa Find the Key" children's game; Mistletoe Marketplace; and 3 Children's Special Activities. Contact: www.ChristmasAtTheGaltHouse.com This Could Be You! to change Are you readyso,help guide your life? If Today's Woman wants to Susie Gaither, Nathasha Bowie, Shannon Harris Val Daugherty, Lisa Lewellen, Betty Fox Find more photos at www.facebook.com/todayswomanmagazine the personal professional growth is Contributing to TheInfluencingand partnered with Davisof womenandan ongoing goal for Women Louisville, and they proved it at their fall fashion event last month. organization Jewelers Talbots to host two fashion shows to benefit Dress for Success. The event showcased stylish outfits perfect for office or evening events. Dress for Success clients, who also modeled in the show, had an opportunity to network with professionals in the community while learning about ways of enhancing their personal style. Betty Fox, executive director for Dress Success, says the group is constantly searching for volunteers who are willing to help them achieve their mission (www.dressforsuccess.org or 502.584.8050). NOVEMBER 19 2011 you toward a permanent healthy lifestyle. Send your personal story (less than 500 words) including your specific goals, age, and current weight. Other subjects you should include in the essay: 1) Are you willing to commit and devote time and energy into 3+ months of physical training at least 4 days a week? 2) Are you motivated enough to work on your own when needed? 3) Can you remove soda, candy, and other processed foods and eat more vegetables and other healthful foods? 4) Are you ready to stop making excuses? Send your essay to email@example.com and put "Ready to Change Your Life" in the subject line by November 18. What Is thIs thIng??? sure you have seen in but this is time Today's Iamthen you will beone. Ifthemausedifferent places the womenthe firstread the QR Woman has used you an app on your smart phone to Code, taken to great video with featured in our Arthritis supplement along with Donna Fox, another woman who lives with arthritis, but still lives life to the fullest. Try it now! www.iamtodayswoman.com 2011 NOVEMBER 23 Women Bettering our small World By cathy Zion / puBlisher I heard the whoops of glee from around the world as the winners of the Nobel Peace Prize were announced last month. Admittedly, not much national news makes me stand up and yell "Yippee" but when I heard that three women had won the coveted award, I did just that. These three women -- Ellen Johnson Sirleaf and Leymah Gbowee of Liberia and Tawakkul Karman of Yemen -- earned this honor for their extraordinary efforts to achieve women's rights amidst oppressive environments. � Ellen Johnson Sirleaf, 72, was the first woman to win Africa's free presidential election and has spearheaded Liberia's emergence from its civil war. � Leyman Gbowee, 39, has five children and has fought Liberia's warlords for the rights of women and against rape. � Tawakkul Karman, 32, the mother of three, is the first Arab woman to win a Nobel Peace Prize and has been a leader in overthrowing Yemen's authoritarian President Ali Abdullah Saleh. Since 1901, the Nobel Prize has been awarded to 549 individuals or organizations but only 43 times to women, making this distinction particularly gratifying. These three women represent thousands around the world who are striving to better the world for women. Recently I had the opportunity -- actually the privilege -- of meeting with 10 Eurasian women who were visiting the United States as part of a state department program. They spent four days in Louisville learning about advancing women as business leaders and gleaning ideas to take back to their respective countries. These women were amazing! They were from Armenia, Azerbaijan, Cyprus, Georgia, Greece, and Turkey. Most owned their own businesses while the others were CEOs of their organizations. Without exception, each exhibited such enthusiasm for hearing new ideas to reach the women in their emerging countries. They asked questions, took notes, asked for take-home material. Their excitement was contagious. One of the women from Turkey left me information about an initiative (www.kagider.org) she helped develop in 2002 to help "strengthen the status of women economically and socially." They're encouraging women to obtain a higher education and seeking affordable child care. They've opened a Women's Development Center to help support women entrepreneurs, holding summits throughout the country. Because only 24 percent of women in Turkey are employed, they started a "WE WANT A JOB" campaign last year. I've just got to share one of their slogans: "Kids...that's not what we can only produce." Sound familiar? Women striving to better the world for women. Louisvillian Colleen Clines has been bringing that mission home since 2009 when a trip to India opened her eyes to the pervasiveness of poverty leading to the prostitution of young Indian girls and women. And so, at the age of 27, Colleen established the Anchal Project (www.anchalproject.org) developing a trade for these women to overcome poverty. Colleen and her partner provide design and marketing services for these women who turn saris into beautiful quilts and pillows. You can read her story on page 8. One of the Indian women wrote: "Working as a prostitute is the most humiliating and exploitive profession in the world. I died every day when I had to sustain that way. Now, with this quilt-making, I feel a new respect for myself." Women striving to better the world for women. 24 NOVEMBER 2011 TODAY'S WOMAN www.iamtodayswoman.com 2011 NOVEMBER 25 Professional Connections Calendar Your go-to spot for professional networking and career-building opportunities around Louisville BPW- Business and Professional Women- New Albany Every 3rd Monday � 5:30 p.m. Tucker's American Favorites 2045 State Street New Albany Sarah Ring 502.550.9503 BPW- Business & Professional Women- River City Every 2nd Wednesday � Noon Lunch and Program noon-1pm University Club 502.499.4420, www.bpwrc.org eWoman Network Every 3rd Thursday � Noon Wildwood Country Club 5000 Bardstown Rd. Angela Reedus 502.592.8244 www.ewomennetwork.com EWI- Executive Women International- Kentuckiana Every 3rd Tuesday � 5:30 p.m. Louis T. Roth & Co. 2100 Gardiner Lane Roberta Brock 502.581.2059 firstname.lastname@example.org The Heart Link Network Every 1st Wednesday � 6:30 p.m. Inverness at Hurstbourne Condos 1200 Club House Drive Barbara Madore 502.377.8625 www.40222.theheartlinknetwork.com IAAP- International Association of Administrative ProfessionalsLouisville Every 2nd Thursday � 5 p.m. 4007 Kresge Way, 2nd Floor Paula Kessler 502.495.5116 Paula_Kessler@kyfbins.com www.iaap-louisville.org Legal Secretaries of Louisville Every 3rd Tuesday � 11:30am Bristol Bar & Grille 614 West Main Street Alice Harris 502.595.2310 #339 email@example.com www.legalseclou-ky.org MLWPC- Metropolitan Louisville Women's Political Caucus Every 3rd Thursday � 5:30 p.m. City Cafe 505 West Broadway Angie Wallace firstname.lastname@example.org www.mlwpc.org NAWBO- National Association of Women Business Owners Every 3rd Tuesday email@example.com www.nawbolouisville.org National Association of Women in Construction Every 2nd Monday � 5:30 p.m. Call for meeting location Patty Stewart 812.288.4208 #121 Network Now Every 2nd Friday � 11:45 a.m. Hurstbourne Country Club Lee Ann Lyle 502.836.1422 firstname.lastname@example.org Take It To Fame Network Every 2nd Tuesday � 6-7:30 p.m. Location Varies; check website Sharon Wimberly 502.500.9394 takeittofamenetwork.com WIN- Women in Networking Every 2nd Wednesday � 11:15 a.m. Oxmoor Country Club 9000 Limehouse Lane Monica Jakoby email@example.com WIN- Women in Networking II Every 3rd Wednesday � 11:30 a.m. Fern Valley Conference Center 2715 Fern Valley Road Kim Fusting 502.267.7066 firstname.lastname@example.org WIN- Women in Networking III Every 2nd Tuesday � 11:30 a.m. Buca di Beppo 2051 South Hurstbourne Pkwy. Laura Morriss 502.599.4917 LMorriss@userinc.com WIN- Women in Networking IV Every 3rd Tuesday � 11:30 a.m. Breckinridge Inn 2800 Breckinridge Lane Lindsey Davis 502.727.9003 email@example.com Women's Council of Realtors Every 3rd Thursday � 11:30 a.m. Wildwood Country Club 5000 Bardstown Rd. Kathy McGann 502.552.3090 firstname.lastname@example.org ZONTA- Advancing The Status of Women Every 1st Thursday � 6:00 p.m. Logan's Steakhouse 5005 Shelbyville Road Joyce Cain 502.339.8682 email@example.com your www.stites.com � 502.587.3400 � Fax 502.387.6391 presents All listings are on a per month basis. To list your meeting free of charge in the calendar, email us your meeting date, time, location, a contact phone number, and website to firstname.lastname@example.org or fax to 502.327.8861. Deadline for inclusion is five weeks prior to issue date (e.g. June 25 for August issue). Spotlight On Education College of Education: Educators as Leaders The College of Education has as its mission the preparation of educators who possess intellectual understanding, holistic perspectives, and professional skills to lead others to the maximum use of their potential for lifelong learning in a multicultural society. We strive to prepare educators as leaders who will take the lead in transforming teaching and learning in their own buildings, the state, the region, and the nation to better serve all students and their families. Dr. Beverly Keepers, Dean, College of Education Spalding University � Office: 502-873-4268 � E-mail: email@example.com -- This is an Advertisement -- Today's Woman TODAY'S WOMAN Dr. Beverly Keepers Dean, College of Education 26 24 NOVEMBER noVEmBER 2011 Sponsored by: www.iamtodayswoman.com www.iamtodayswoman.com 2011 NOVEMBER 2011 NOVEMBER 27 25 Party DRESS! We show you how to choose the best style for the right holiday occasion and give you a few ideas on great events you won't want to miss. By Anita Oldham and Tiffany White � Photos by Chet White Styling by Wendy Anguiano � Makeup by Isidro Valencia Hair by Christina Davis of Blades Salon & Spa For a fun evening with friends, attend the Old Louisville Holiday House Tour December 4-5. Susan's home is one of the eight that will be featured. Here are a few other holiday events you might want to mark on your calendar: KAlIGHTOSCOPe & CHrISTMAS AT THe GAlT HOuSe when: November 14-January 2 contact: www.galthouse.com Girls' Night Out TATIANA COllINS Marketing Project Manager Al J. Schneider Company SuSAN COleMAN Graphic Designer Articulations Graphic Design A VelVeTeeN rABBIT CHrISTMAS AT DerBy DINNer PlAyHOuSe when: November 19, 25-26; contact: www.derbydinner.com My OlD KeNTuCKy HOMe CANDlelIGHT TOurS when: December 9-10 contact: www.parks.ky.gov SPIrIT OF JeFFerSON BreAKFAST WITH SANTA CruISe when: December 17 contact: www.belleoflouisville.org December 3, 10, 17, 23 SuSAN IS WeArING: Headbands, $38 each; echo Design gloves, $32; Drew jacket, $348; David Kahn pants, $196 all available at Boutique Serendipity, 1301 Herr lane, 502.423.0058; Nine West Footproof shoes, $50 available at Off Broadway, 4600 Shelbyville road, 502.897.5232; Monet gold hoop earrings, $20 available at Macy's at Oxmoor Center, 7900 Shelbyville road, 502.423.3000. TATIANA IS WeArING: INC jacket, $140; INC top, $60; INC pencil skirt, $70; bracelet, $18; bracelet, $32; Betsy Johnson necklace, $65 & earrings $35; Charter Club gloves, $74, available at Macy's at Oxmoor Center, 7900 Shelbyville road, 502.423.3000; Jeffrey Tyler Natalie shoe boots, $70, available at Off Broadway Shoe Warehouse, 4600 Shelbyville road, 502.897.5232. 28 NOVEMBER 2011 TOday's WOMaN Party DRESS COurTNey KIeFer Director of Special events at Glassworks Courtney Kiefer, an employee at Glassworks, suggests exploring your creative side by signing up for one of their Blow Your Own Ornament sessions which will be offered every Saturday and Sunday in November and December. Also, consider attending one of these events: FeSTIVAl OF TreeS AND lIGHTS when: November 11-13 contact: www.kosairchildrens.com lIGHT uP lOuISVIlle when: November 25 contact: www.louisvilleky.gov CHrISTMAS TOur OF HOMeS IN BArDSTOWN when: December 10 contact: www.visitbardstown.com Casual yet Stunning COurTNey IS WeArING: ryu top, $82; ryu green skinny jeans, $98 available at Collections Boutique, 1301 Herr lane Suite 181, 502.749.7200; Style & Co. bracelets (2), $26 each; Collectioneighteen floppy hat, $42; rachel roy skull ring, $44, available at Macy's at Oxmoor Center; Penny loves Kenny Mamie boots, $90, available at Off Broadway Shoe Warehouse. 30 NOVEMBER 2011 TOday's WOMaN www.iamtodayswoman.com 2011 NOVEMBER 31 Party DRESS KATIe BlACKerBy Actress for Actors Theatre Make plans to see Katie perform in The Christmas Story at Actors Theatre, and attend one of these other popular holiday productions. THe CHrISTMAS STOry AT ACTOrS THeATre when: November 8-27 contact: www.actorstheatre.org lIVING CHrISTMAS Tree WAlNuT STreeT BAPTIST CHurCH when: November 9-11 contact: www.walnutstreetbaptist.org SNOW BAll GAlA when: November 19 contact: www.kosairchildrens.com BeST CHrISTMAS PAGeANT eVer when: November 21-December 20 contact: www.stageone.org A CHrISTMAS CArOl ACTOrS THeATre when: December 7-23 contact: www.actorstheatre.org BrOWN FOrMAN NuTCrACKer when: December 10-23 contact: www.louisvilleballet.org A Formal Affair KATIe IS WeArING: Anna Sui dress, $555; Sophia & Chloe earrings, $369; Barbara Bui shoes, $515, available at Peacock Boutique 2828 Frankfort Avenue, 502.897.1158; Charter Club bracelet $98 & ring $24; Guess ring, $25 available at Macy's; Anna & Ava headband, $10; Ilana shawl, $68 available at Dillard's at the Mall St. Matthews, 5000 Shelbyville road, 502.893.4400. 32 NOVEMBER 2011 TOday's WOMaN Holiday Table Tell me about this holiday table. I call it a contemporary farmhouse table. The top is reclaimed douglas fir with a wax finish. The base is steel with a rust finish. It seats six to eight people. I love my And the chairs? They are solid wood ladderbacks inspired by a 1960s design by Gio Ponti. The finish is a black stain with a bit of white washed into the grain. The seats are in a natural cotton. By Lucy M. Pritchett Photos by Melissa Donald I like the variety. I can't have just one style. I look for things that are of good or interesting design. Usually made between 1820 and 1980. That is a big range of things I am attracted to. If I love the design or the execution of the piece, I buy it. You have a nice mix of new and vintage items in your shop. There are also small vintage items...bookends, souvenir state or place ashtrays...that sort of thing. anything that has a Kentucky or bourbon industry theme flies out of here. What is your take on the holidays? There is a lot of anxiety over gift giving. a simple and heartfelt gift is always appreciated. There is nothing wrong with a token gift as long as it is well-presented and thoughtful. The other thing that stresses people is concern over being the perfect host or hostess. Remember, the style icons have a staff of 24 to help them plan and put on the perfect party. Where do you shop for gifts? How do you decorate your table for the holidays? I am a fan of natural materials...seed pods, moss, dried and fresh flowers. I like to use a mix of metals, colors and textures, wood boxes or containers to hold napkins, silverware. I might use aluminum chargers with the look of pewter, antique brass candlesticks, copper napkin rings, and bronzetone flatware. I like to entertain casually and usually set up food and drink on the sideboard. Usually from my own inventory of vintage items. I pick something specific to the personality of the person or his or her specific collection. Or, I shop at scout on Market or dandelion on Lexington Rd. What about gifts? I carry smaller items that work well as hostess gifts. For example, a set of eight cotton cocktail napkins. some with colorful patterns or solids and some that are a novelty napkin. Like the black and white ones I have now that are printed with "Blah, blah, blah." I carry Tantine artisan-crafted candles and Blithe and Bonny soy wax candles. Both are from small production companies and are exclusive to Louisville in the shop. also Blithe and Bonny has a goat's milk-based bath and hand soap and an al-natural dish washing liquid that comes in a repurposed green wine bottle with a red wax seal. It is a bit unexpected and a tongue-in-cheek hostess gift. What gift are you looking for under the tree? a weekend getaway at a seaside cabin. I also need a few vintage longsleeved shirts in autumn colors. and you can't go wrong with a gift of food. There is almost nothing I turn away. What about a centerpiece? I don't always have a standard centerpiece on the table as they sometimes are too tall. I try and keep it low and use smaller arrangements of flowers maybe in mason jars or pharmacy bottles. Andrew Hudson owner/designer Hudson Home, 806 E. Market st. NEIGHBORHOOd: Highlands HOUsEHOLd: Partner, Wyeth akeley TOday's WOMaN 34 NOVEMBER 2011 Arthritis Arthritis And OrthOpedic supplement Living With ROLL PUNCHES Dodge Emotional Blows Help Her Stay in the Ring Knock Out Pain with the Dodge Emotional Blows SUPPLEMENT CREDITS -- editor & designer: Jessica smith � Photos: Melissa donald � MakeuP: holly oyler Staying positive is key to coping with arthritis limitations Kathryn Grundy Like many chronic diseases, arthritis affects more than just the body. Though arthritis is most commonly associated with physical pain, it involves an emotional process as well. "The diagnosis was so off my radar that it was a huge shock," says Julie Faulds, 44, who lives with rheumatoid arthritis and fibromyalgia. "When I initially heard `rheumatoid arthritis,' I said, `What do you mean, `arthritis'? I am only 38!" "Any time someone is given a diagnosis that they're uncomfortable with, you can go to Elisabeth K�bler-Ross's five stages of grieving," says Dr. Libby Bethel, a clinical psychologist at the Frazier Rehab Institute in Louisville. The K�bler-Ross model describes the steps by which people cope with grief, specifically denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. process of 32-year-old Stacy State, who was diagnosed with juvenile rheumatoid arthritis when she was 10. "It took about 10 to 12 years after I was initially diagnosed to get into the coping stage," State says. "In high school I stopped taking my medications because I wanted to be med-free, and I still denied the fact that I had arthritis or that it was impacting my life." One reason denial is a common reaction is because it provides a way to avoid dealing with the diagnosis, says Bethel. "Anytime you have a loss of abilities to do something, you have to deal with a loss of self," Bethel says. "You can move through stages of depression as you figure out who you are." The stress of dealing with the pain and stiffness can take its toll emotionally as well. "Your whole life changes because of it," Faulds says. "I felt like my feet had been running a marathon all night while I was sleeping, and my hands felt like claws. I went through all the stages of grief." There is also the stress of new "What d `arthrit o you mean, is'? I'm o � Julie nly 38!" Faulds, 4 had rhe 4, upon findin um g atoid ar th ritis out she emotional limitations. A woman might feel limited when she feels like she has to give up her goals and quit the things she enjoys. "You see everybody else out there achieving things you used to have on your goal list or you used to want to do, but had to take off," State says. Fortunately, learning to live with arthritis rather than avoid it can help one elude the pitfalls of depression and isolation. "Don't think you can't have a fulfilling life living with arthritis," State urges. "You can still be happy and live a full life." Bethel suggests you learn to take care of Bethel says the initial emotional reaction to a diagnosis of arthritis is often the question, "Where am I limited?" Individuals with arthritis deal with the diagnosis in different ways, but common negative responses include avoidance, depression, and isolation. The difficulty of coping with the emotional effects of arthritis is influenced by the severity of pain and physical symptoms. In cases where the possibility of physical limitation is serious, diagnosis is often met with denial. Denial played a huge role in the emotional yourself, know your limitations, understand where you get your energy, and learn how to ask for help. "If you address any of those areas, you'll probably feel better," she says. Positive thinking is also an especially powerful antidote, as exemplified by Donna Fox, whose symptoms were diagnosed as juvenile rheumatoid arthritis when she was 4 years old. It might seem impossible that living with arthritis for 44 years could be an advantage, but for her it has been the key to beating isolation and depression. Fox, who describes arthritis as her "shadow," says, "I don't know life without arthritis. I didn't think of myself as different, and I think that has been my advantage." She offers the charismatic mantra: "Hang tight, hang tough, keep movin' and don't stop. Don't ever stop." Faulds subscribes to a similar philosophy. "When I'm positive, I can handle anything," she says. "When I'm negative about it, it just piles up, and I feel worse and worse and worse." Emphasizing the positive can lighten a woman's mood and reduce stress. Bethel supports this strategy, recommending that individuals focus on what they can do instead of what they can't do. She says that a positive sense of self-worth is essential for communicating your needs to those around you. "You have to be able to decide you have enough value to ask for what you want," she says. "A lot of women think they have value based on what they do for others, and they don't give themselves enough value for just being." Stress reduction techniques are great tools for managing the emotional effects of arthritis as well. Some healthy options include writing in a journal, listening to music, connecting with friends, or playing with a pet. Another beneficial tool might be self-help and therapy groups such as those offered through the Arthritis Foundation. These groups give women resources to learn about arthritis while connecting them with other women who share the same struggles. "Figure out where you get your strength, and spend time in that," Bethel says. "It can be meditation, spirituality, music. There are a lot of ways to get a sense of peace, and with peace comes strength to handle any adversity." 36 Arthritis and Orthopedic Supplement 2011 TODAY'S WOMAN STAY in the RING Open communication and a helpful attitude can keep her fighting Jessica Smith aren Taylor, 58, signs her emails with this quote from the Greek philosopher Sophocles: "The one who knows how to show and to accept kindness will be a friend better than any possession." It's an appropriate signature for Karen. She's a smiling sister, wife, mother, grandmother, and friend who lives in New Castle, Ky. Her story deals with dairy cows, gardening, makeup, and flea markets. It also deals with six different forms of osteoarthritis she's fought over the past 30 years. But Karen's fight with arthritis is not one she faces alone, nor is she the only one affected by it. Her family and friends walk with her through every step of her journey. "Of course, I couldn't have done any of it without my family," she says. It's true that family and close friends are among the greatest support sources for a person dealing with arthritis pain. It's also true that social dynamics can change as a person becomes physically limited by From left: Jane Mann, Karen Taylor, and arthritis. Kenneth Taylor. Learning to communicate your needs -- whether you have arthritis yourself or you know someone who does -- is crucial to maintaining healthy relationships. help her Family Ties Karen was in her late 20s when she bent down to get something out of her kitchen cabinet and couldn't straighten back up. A knifelike pain stabbed from her lower back. She was soon diagnosed with degenerative disc disease, followed by her first of five back surgeries. Through the years, Karen has faced communication barriers as well as physical ones. "Some people, you can look at them and immediately you know they have some form of arthritis," Karen says. "In my case, you can't necessarily tell by looking at me. You can't see all the scars from the five back surgeries. You can't see the metal that's inside my neck and my lower back. So it's really hard for some people to understand my limitations." The open communication she shares with her family is a huge key to her success. She says her husband, sisters, son, and even her grandkids make an effort to understand and help her with arthritis pain. K "Family members can be one of the most important elements in keeping a positive attitude because it kind of depends on how they do react," she says. "And how they support or don't support you is going to kind of determine your attitude, or at least contribute to it." Marilyn Bornstein, a licensed marriage and family therapist at Jewish Family and Career Services in Louisville, says communication and education are crucial elements in helping a person cope with a physically limiting disease. "You want your family to learn about it, to be educated about the disease you have so they know how to help you," she says. "Communication is the biggest piece of this. If you begin to discuss it openly, your family is your first line of defense. If it's not working out, then you have to get further help in communication." Karen says the best way family members and friends of women living with arthritis can help their loved one is to simply show they care. Asking simple questions such as "How are you feeling today?" and "Do you feel like getting out and going to the grocery with me?" can go a long way. Karen also appreciates a generally helpful attitude and honest talking about frustrations, needs, or clarifications. Continued on page 38 Photo by Melissa DonalD 38 Arthritis and Orthopedic Supplemnt 2011 TODAY'S WOMAN Continued from page 36 system is attacking her joints. Diagnosed at age 17 while a junior in high school, Susie has run into her share of communicative roadblocks. Explaining that you are a Normal Joint Osteoarthritis Rheumatoid Arthritis teenager with arthritis is often a frustrating Osteoarthritis is caused by the loss of joint cartilage Rheumatoid arthritis occurs when the body's due to years of wear and tear or an injury to the immune system attacks its own joint tissue. The Bone process. joint. This is the most common form of arthritis and cause of RA is unknown, and it a ects about one a ects about one in every 15 Americans. in every 235 Americans. "I just remember all my friends and my schoolmates being scared, and kind of scared Bone spurs can develop Muscle as cartilage degenerates. e synovial of me," she says. "It was almost like they e in amed ey aren't painful membrane cells in the unless they touch thought they might catch whatever I had." encloses the synovial uid another bone or a synovial uid. begin wearing Now, Susie is married. She's a runner nearby nerve. away the bone and a teacher. But she still struggles to and cartilage. Synovial uid explain to others that RA severely limits nourishes e synovium her social life. the joint. sac becomes swollen and "It used to be I didn't tell anyone what in amed. Cartilage was wrong because it was hard to explain -- cushions adjacent Malfunctioning bones and acts as Tendons `Oh, but you don't look sick,'" she says. "Yes, white blood cells, a shock absorber. connect Cartilage erodes a er believing there's a muscle to I'm fortunate that I don't, but sometimes I years of use or a er an threat, ood the bone. e joint capsule injury. synovial uid and wish the illness came with purple spots so Ligaments encloses the joint. attack the joint. connect bone Bones rub against each people can see that I'm sick." to bone. other and against nerves, Bone TW Infographic by Jessica Smith causing severe pain. RA is a lonely illness, she says. Sources: http://health.howstu works.com, http://www.webmd.com., and http://www.arthritis.org Because of the extreme fatigue RA causes, Karen and Kenneth recall the changes that And she herself strives for open even shopping for a few hours can be communication with others around her, despite have come with each of Karen's diagnoses: the overwhelming. the struggles against others' perceptions and cutting back on entertaining, the deterioration "I went out with several of my friends of golfing and bowling, the gradual shopping on a Sunday, and I was just stereotypes of arthritis. "I wish they could understand how hard it elimination of all-day trips to the zoo with exhausted sitting on one of the benches in really is," she says. "I have days when I can't get their grandchildren. But Kenneth does what the mall because I was waiting on them," she out of bed and never leave the house, but they he can to help Karen keep a positive attitude, says. "They said, `Sorry you're bored.' I said, don't see me those days. Just because you can't which she says makes all the difference. `I'm not bored -- I'm exhausted. I just need to "Just being there and trying to do what she rest,' because I was shopping during naptime. see it, that doesn't mean it's not there." couldn't do, trying to help her out the best I can I think they think I just don't want to do the with what time I could, just doing whatever I things that they're doing, so that's difficult." In Sickness and in Health Kenneth Taylor, Karen's husband, is a can whenever I can," Kenneth says. Susie says the Arthritis Foundation of worrier by nature. Louisville has helped her learn to communicate "Worry and fear, we've been through Sister to Sister effectively about her RA. that several times," he says. "When she goes Jane Mann, one of Karen's three sisters, "I'm a lot more open about it and willing through these surgeries, they've told us up has also felt the effects of Karen's struggle with to discuss it than I used to be," she says. "It's front she might not walk again." arthritis and degenerative disc disease. Upon so difficult to explain, and that's the most In addition to the emotional toll a spouse hearing the news of Karen's first diagnosis, she frustrating part." might feel when his or her loved one starts says she was quick to think the worst. facing limitations from arthritis, he or she "I think the fact that she was so young -- I More than Medicine might have to adjust to shifting household roles. mean, you think about the things we have to Both Susie and Karen say that if you are a "A woman with severe arthritis pain may start limiting ourselves to do, and you don't think spouse, family member, or friend of someone not be able to keep up with household work," about having to do that until you get older," she with arthritis, the best things you can do are says Bornstein. "The family may have to pull says, wiping away tears. "Of course you're upset." have a helpful attitude, educate yourself on together to answer this need. She has to share Jane wasn't afraid to ask Karen how she was arthritis, and show you care through words this with her family and see what they can doing, and she took the time to listen to the and actions. Women battling arthritis can help work out." response. others around them by communicating directly Kenneth has seen Karen through each "We talked on the phone every day," she and honestly about their needs and limitations. doctor's appointment, and he's had to adjust says. "We talk about anything, so that wasn't If direct communication is difficult, help can any different, even though it was a bad be found through the Arthritis Foundation or as she has. "I had to learn to do a whole lot of other diagnosis." through communicative therapy. things -- just taking care of the house and the As Karen's email signature says, someone laundry, clothes and dishes and everything," "I'm not bored. I'm just exhausted." who can accept and give kindness is worth far says Kenneth, who is a dairy farmer by trade. Susie Roberts of Carrollton, Ky., is 25 more than any possession. The loving support "I've tried to learn myself when she was not years old. Like Karen, she battles arthritis, but of family and friends can do more for a woman able to do things, because she tries to hide a of a different kind -- Susie has rheumatoid fighting arthritis than medication -- it can give lot of it." arthritis, which means her body's own immune her the motivation to stay in the ring. Understanding Arthritis 40 Arthritis and Orthopedic Supplement 2011 TODAY'S WOMAN www.iamtodayswoman.com Arthritis and Orthopedic Supplement 2011 41 at home and on t he go! Compiled b y Jessica Sm ith Keep a hot or cold compress handy. Use a bag with a shoulder strap to avoid strain on your wrists or hands. Knock Out PAIN Keep quick, easy food on hand for the hardest days. Think about investing in an electric jar opener. Look for kitchen utensils with larger and/or cushioned handles. Roll-out drawers can help you find what you need without bending down. Model: Susie Roberts Photos by Melissa Donald Courtesy Mike Smith and Artistic Kitchens Keep a wrap or towel in the car for handy hip support. "Keep a pair of slippers/super comfy shoes for those bad days. While I'm at my desk, no one knows if I'm in my slippers." -- Lisa Fahringer, 32, rheumatoid arthritis es stretch gentle shown i, or do rch has Tai Ch eing a yoga or omyalgia rese general well-b ct , do nd "Walk u can. Fibr impa levels a o in lowwhen y results in pain erers engage algia y ff e positiv ronic pain su ith, 57, fibrom ch m I know when ." -- Dodie S e yself. If exercis pace m nging day, I o is to y challe ings I d rely on f the th ave a physicall prior. I also Maria One o g to h " n day." -- in t as I ca I am go t as much res ives me every g e try to g gth that God arthritis e stren , rheumatoid ack a th lower b 50 ive my Lora Hayes, Schulz, will g ul!" -- rf nd who a husba nally is wonde g "Havin occasio e massag arthritis steo 46, o 42 Arthritis and Orthopedic Supplement 2011 TODAY'S WOMAN A JourNey DowN the AiSle November By Lauren Williams Something New I found the perfect hairpiece on Etsy. I was looking for something floral, but I wanted to be careful not to look too beach wedding, since November 5 in Louisville is so not the beach. I found this bridal hair clip handmade with ivory silk flower petals, whispy goose feathers, and tiny pearl centers. Exactly what I was looking for. www.fanciestrands.etsy.com Arlington, Tennessee Lauren and Mike are in the midst of their Do-It-Yourself wedding planning. Something old Well, not old-old, but old-ish. Mike bought me these shark earrings a couple of years ago, maybe to express his love for me. I am carrying them with me down the aisle on my bouquet. In some weird way, it will be like Mike is with me keeping me from being so nervous. Something Blue My journey to find earrings actually began with a photograph I saw of Angelina Jolie at the 2009 Oscars. She was wearing emerald tear-drop earrings. I searched eBay, estate sales, and high-end thrift stores to find a pair of emerald earrings. While searching for emerald earrings, I came across these beautiful blue quartz earrings that suddenly changed my mind about the emeralds. It was still a pop of color, but buying the blue earrings would end my search process and give me something blue to wear in the wedding. Dandelion Boutique 3729 Lexington Road, 502.899.3729 Something Borrowed When I was in middle school, my cousin Emily (the one I had a joint bridal shower with) went to Cambodia on a mission trip. She brought both my sister and me a bracelet. I lost mine at some point, but my sister never takes hers off. She is letting me borrow it on my wedding day to wear as an anklet. Makeup For my makeup I wanted a dewey look a bit more dramatic than the everyday makeup I wear. Katie used warm colors to make my eyes stand out. I have always been afraid of eyes, they are just so gross, so having Katie curl my eye lashes was the hardest part of the whole process. Other than that, I loved having my makeup done. I am so glad I didn't end up doing it myself!" Katie Szuran Changes Hair Salon 3922 Ruckriegel Pkwy #208 502.267.4088 hair I imagined a grecian goddess running through a field of wildflowers for my wedding day hair -- slightly unstructured, a braided headband look, a few stray pieces, a low bun twist and a floral headpiece next to the bun. My friend Savannah (whose boyfriend is one of the groomsmen), helped me to turn my ideas into a beautiful wedding hairstyle. Savannah Baird, Changes Hair Salon 3922 Ruckriegel Pkwy, 502.295.4632 Addictedtohair.blogspot.com 44 NOVEMBER 2011 NEXT MONTH: Here Comes the Bride? TOday's WOMaN Her Tess Krebs Caterer and home renovator InspIrAtIons By Holly GreGor / pHotos By Melissa donald currently gets her inspirations from raising her 16-year-old daughter, tristan, partnering with her boyfriend of eight years, rich McFadden, to run McKree properties, LLC., and running her catering business of 20 years, called tess. "I love everything I do. I have a very big appetite. I could live another 100 years." with that said, tess has a recipe for her life. "Always follow your heart." tess practices this on a daily basis, out of necessity, but mostly instinct now. one of her earlier memories of listening to her heart was when tess was pregnant with tristan. she was watching the movie Legends of the Fall with Brad pitt. At the beginning of the movie, set in Montana, an American Indian said a blessing that translated to, "Always follow your heart." Brad pitts' character in the movie was named tristen, prompting her to announce right then and there that her baby was going to be named tristan...the female version spelled with an "a" instead of an "e." "Following my heart is what drives my bus," says tess. For instance, when catering, it is now instinctual for her to do it with love and purpose. "when you cook from your heart, and you're really excited to do it, it goes into the food, making it more vibrant." 6 8 11 is inspiration life...there is only lack "thereit," no lack ofKrebsof timein to act on says tess who that same joy is amplified when she cooks with others. "when I'm working with a cook, and we're having fun, the food comes out tasting and looking good, so when people eat it they feel that love inside of them." Her artistic expression is also brought out when plating the food and decorating the table. "Life is about garnish." tess says emphatically. "You've got to garnish your plate." Be intentional about making it look pretty. not contrived, but with an artistic eye. "when I go grocery shopping for a party I don't list my ingredients for the garnish. I go and see what they have and get excited about it." Just recently, she went crazy for the Japanese eggplant she found at whole Foods with its long, curved, parlor-purple body, and a chartreuse top hat. she combined it with tiny, petite champagne grapes, using those for her garnish. this same enthusiasm is also seen in her other life as a refinisher of old houses. don't make the mistake of saying she "flips houses." "I hate that term," says tess. It implies that they buy houses, put a few coats of fresh paint on them, raise the price, and then sell them. Quite the contrary. "You have to have a relationship with your house. the house will inform you of what it wants to be," explains tess. she feels strongly that if you don't listen, you have missed all the possibilities for that house. the winning recipe for this business, McKree properties, LLC., is her collaboration with rich. "we are really good at bouncing ideas off each other. there is no tally sheet. we get excited together." Having bought and sold over 15 houses, especially in today's market, means they must be doing something right. so, for now, those are tess's main inspirations. she says she would also like to direct movies. "I am good at macrovision, and I like to be in charge," something she believes will help in movie making. However, when I complimented her on being a great subject to photograph because of the way she moved and looked on camera, she said excitedly, "Let's go model together." the funny thing is she really means it and she'll do it. she explains, "I come up with ideas...and I make it happen." Good grief, tess does need another 100 years to accomplish all she can. 3 13 Things That Inspire Tess: 1. Shoes, especially shoes from DSW. I told myself when I turn 50, I'm going to buy shoes. It's a sign of extravagance. these shoes make my legs look fabulous. 2. Going barefoot. when I was little, I was badly pigeon-toed. the doctor said, "she's too pretty to put in braces. Just let her go barefoot as much as possible," and it corrected itself. now I go barefoot because I like feeling the textures and temperature of the ground. 3. My family...my daughter, Tristan, and my boyfriend, Rich. I cannot imagine life without my daughter. she is a miracle. she is amazing, beautiful, incredibly talented, and a really good person. she feels good about herself, whereas, I spent so many years building my self esteem. rich encourages me, admires me, loves me...he gives me unconditional love. 4. Coffee shops. they smell good, are warm and cozy, and have really good energy. when I take my laptop with me, I am working parallel with the other people rather than alone. that inspires me, feeling their energy, it helps me re-dedicate myself to what I'm working on. 5. Produce at Whole Foods and farmers' markets. It's all about the color, shape, and texture. when the farmer or the people at whole Foods spend time making mountains of gorgeous produce...all fresh, in season, and laid out beautifully. It's exciting. the produce has energy; it pops. 6. Hardbound, full-color cookbooks. even though I like printed words, I like beautiful pictures in cookbooks. when you look at those images, they are little pieces of art. It makes me want to cook. 7. "Old house" projects. we let the house `tell' us what it wants to be. I think you have to have a relationship with the house. If you try to force it to be something that it doesn't want to be, then you cut yourself out of many possibilities. 8. Open vistas. I feel so free. I like space. It opens my mind to all the possibilities. I like high open land or looking at the ocean. 9. New supplies -- art supplies, cooking utensils, office supplies. 10. Lowe's at Norton Commons. I like the whole atmosphere. It's new, big, and I like the color of it. A lot more intention is put into the displays. the people who work there are happy, and when I work in collaboration with them, I learn what they know. each Lowe's is different; I like this one the best. It suits my aesthetic. 11. Runners. I'm not a runner, but I think they are dedicated and disciplined. there's something about their stride that reminds me of deer. I think running is a beautiful sport. 12. Working with others -- parallel work or collaboration. working with people is a truly human experience. I have to keep my mind open to their ideas, because if I don't, they leave. But, if I do, I get these really great ideas. plus, it's really fun. there's so much laughter. I'm a shy person who loves to talk. 13. Bookstores. I wish I could add 12 hours to my day, so I could read all the books. It's a way to touch someone else's creativity. when I go into a well-done bookstore, I see all these possibilities. It just feels good. 3 1 decorating with Flowers by Lauren WiLLiams � Photos by meLissa DonaLD T o PAGE 50 raditional flower decorations remind us of the holidays as we've known them since childhood -- the burnt golden warmth of reds, oranges and yellows of Thanksgiving and the lush reds and greens of Christmas. Traditional flower arrangements don't stop with the flowers, but continue with ribbon, candles, assorted orbs, fruits, and a mist of sparkle and shine. Even the modern approach of decorating with flowers for the holidays can't help but carry a slight essence of tradition. The memories of warmth, families at the table, the nod to all things seasonal simplified -- as in flower arrangements without all the fuss. We met with two local florists for ideas on how to decorate with flowers for Thanksgiving and Christmas: Patty Isaacs from A Touch of Elegance Florist, who had a more traditional approach and Stephanie Lindsay of Green Lady Studio, who showed us a more contemporary approach. Fall centerpiece A cornucopia flower arrangement can be used as a Thanksgiving centerpiece or on the buffet table. Patty Isaacs of A Touch of Elegance Florist suggested including a small dose of lime green within those warm Thanksgiving colors for a bright pop. Photo: A touch of ElEgAncE natural texture Inspired by the natural landscape, Stephanie Lindsay of Green Lady Studio created a large round centerpiece. Depending on the scale of your table, you could have one large centerpiece, or two to three small ones. She spirals broom corn, rose hips for the berry texture, amaranth (a traditional grain), and a few cattails while being careful to not use too many. This centerpiece is like an evening picnic in the field -- your candle is tucked deep down in the grass while the wild natural landscape surrounds it. Photo: MElissA DonAlD 48 noVEmBER 2011 Today's Woman www.iamtodayswoman.com 2011 NOVEMBER 49 ecorating with flowers for Christmas goes beyond the table, extending throughout the home and beginning with the entrance way. As guests arrive, a small flower arrangement sitting at the entrance table will greet and welcome their arrival. Echo the traditional Christmas color palette of red and green in the guest rooms, the table, window sill, fireplace mantel, and even the staircase. For traditional flower decor, consider the Christmas smells of pine, eucalyptus, and cinnamon as part of an arrangement. Use pine cones and cinnamon sticks within the flowers. Isaacs adds silver and gold to the red and green color scheme by incorporating glitter balls, jewels at the bottom of a clear vase, and a spritz of shimmer mist. For modern decorations, Lindsay keeps choices of flowers to the minimum and puts a modern twist on the traditional materials and color palette. D o PAGE 48 Tips on Flowers: 1. Change the water every third day to maintain flowers. 2. Trim as much greenery off the stem as possible that will be placed under the water line. Flowers will work hard to keep all those extra leaves alive, so cutting them off will extend the lifetime. 3. For a cohesive look, use the same types of flowers in different variations throughout the house. 4. Decorating with flowers for Thanksgiving centers around the table, while Christmas spreads the joy throughout the home. A rosy setting Photo: MElissA DonAlD This arrangement created by Green Lady Studio was inspired by peppermint taffy. Stephanie Lindsay used a 4-inch contemporary white vase and two dozen roses. The flowers must be larger than the vase. Each rose head worked together at descending heights to create a domelike collection of roses, tied together with a rubber band at the stems to maintain the shape and to allow for easy cleaning of the water. for the MAntle This mantel piece, created by Green Lady Studio, takes traditional materials such as magnolia leaves, and tailors them in a non-traditional way. Lindsay describes this piece as Gaugin meets a lotus flower. In addition to the magnolia leaves, magnolia pods and coxcomb were used. The color scheme takes a turn toward richer jewel tones. Pink and magenta coxcomb were placed side by side to add depth. This could decorate the mantel without cluttering it, leaving room for the family photos and other holiday decor you may have. Different textures Variety adds interest. A Touch of Elegance created this arrangement with a cohesive Christmas color palette and incorporated several different textures, heights, and green tones. Photo: A touch of ElEgAncE A Touch of Elegance created this traditional centerpiece by starting with the larger flowers then adding filler greenery, ribbon, pine cones, and white shimmery feather-like pieces. CenterpieCe NOVEMBER 2011 TOday's WOMaN 50 Photo: A touch of ElEgAncE Photo: MElissA DonAlD SMART Holiday Styles Korrect Optical Dedicated to pure luxury, Barton Perriera's approach to fashion frames redefines style and elegance. Shop a wide selection of inspired designs for women and men in dramatic colors, shapes, materials and styles, in optical and sun wear models. 4036 Dutchmans Lane 4747 Dixie Highway 502.895.2020 www.korrect.com Sophie's Fine Yarn Shoppe Visit, browse, and let us assist you with all your knitting and crocheting needs. Our shop is conveniently located in the Stonefield Square Shopping Center next to the Fresh Market. Classes available. The Clothes Boutique Ladies Fine Consignments Our jewelry makes great Christmas gifts! In this difficult economy, take advantage of our low, low prices for your clothing and accessories. Also, consign with us for $$$$$. 6502 W. Highway 22 Crestwood, KY 40014 502.241.9438 www.theclothesboutique.com Open 7 days with a wide selection of yarn and accessories. 10482 Shelbyville Road 502.244.4927 � www.sophiesfineyarn.com A Mother's Touch Come see our special Holiday selections and gifts! Specializing in Mother's, Grandmother's, Children's, Spirit and Themed jewelry. Established in 1999, A Mother's Touch has the largest selection of charms, engravables, jewelry repair and personalized gifts for any occasion, including Posh Mommy, and featuring Trollbeads & Chamilia. 12312 B Shelbyville Road 502.253.9477 www.amotherstouchjewelry.com STYLE CALENDAR November 3, 10 & 17 � Thursdays Sassy Fox Upscale Consignment Join us for Wine and Special Discounts from 4-8pm. 502.895.3711 November 11 & 12 502.253.9477 John Seelye Furs Offers a wide variety of the latest fashions and styles of fine furs and accessories. Purchase from our showroom, or have your fur custom designed. John Seelye Furs provides cold storage, cleaning, restyling and repair on premises. A family business locally owned and operated for 49 years. 9800 Shelbyville Road #111 � Louisville, KY 40223 502-423-8555 --ADVERTISEMENT-- A Mother's Touch Join us for an Open House Nov. 11 & 12 and a Limo Hop Nov. 12. November 11 & 12 - Friday & Saturday John Seelye Furs 2-Day Sale. 50% off all regular-priced merchandise. Call 502-423-8555 STYLE CALENDAR continued on page 50 SMART Holiday Styles We offer the latest fashions to dress your little one in exceptional style! Shop online today for the latest hip, chic and trendy fashions for babies and children! Receive 15% off first purchase. Enter code CHIC101 My Bel Amour SHOP ONLINE www.mybelamour.com 502.653.6119 Olivia & Co. Boutique NEW HOLIDAY MERCHANDISE HAS ARRIVED! We stock Alberto Makali, Frank Lyman, Simon Chang, Dolce Vita, Sao Paulo, Insight, Radzoli, Tru Luxe Jeans, Onex Shoes and much more. Sassy Fox Upscale Consignment Specializing in women's name brand and boutique/designer clothing and accessories from casual to formal. Designer Clothing, Handbags and Fine Jewelry. 1850 S. Hurstbourne Pkwy. #135 (Next to Shoe Carnival) Fashion forward without spending a fortune! 150 Chenoweth Lane St. Matthews 502.895.3711 Louisville, KY 40220 502.384.3694 Clater Jewelers Diamond Center Since 1949 Twinkle, Twinkle! Celebrating 62 Years Westport Village � 502.426.0077 � www.claterjewelers.com --ADVERTISEMENT-- Boutique Serendipity Fashion for the Holidays! Collections. Denim. Dresses. Jewelry. Shoes. Westport Village 502.423.0058 www.ShopBoutiqueSerendipity.com Facebook.com/BoutiqueSerendipity STYLE CALENDAR November 25 � 502.895.6600 eye dia , design it again Visit us on Fat Friday! November 1-30 The Clothes Boutique Ladies Fine Consignments. Find Great Brands at Great Prices. 502.241.9438 November 1-30 502.423.0058 Boutique Serendipity Fashion for the Holidays A Taste of Kentucky Serve a glass of Mothers Little Helper in this whimsical handpainted wine glass from local artist Gail Corso. Available in all our stores. Downtown in the Aegon Center 400 West Market Facing 4th St. 502.566.4554 Mall St. Matthews by the Women's Dillard's 502.895.2733 November 25 -- Black Friday Sale Up to 75% Off! November 1-30 www.mybelamour.com My Bel Amour Exceptional & unique children's clothing & accessories. Order online. First purchase 15% off! Code: CHIC101. November 1-30 , The Lily Pad Lidn greatest inventio ! wrap since plastic Olivia & Co. Boutique eyedia, design it again We will donate 10% of all sales to Center for Women & Families. In this re-energized world of green, eyedia serves to reconnect items from one owner to another. 502.384.3694 November 1-30 A Taste of Kentucky Stylish gifts for any occasion! � INSIDE -- 7500 sq.ft. of quality consignment furniture. � OUTSIDE -- 1000 sq.ft. of quality consignment yard, porch and garden furnishings, in our newly painted and furnished space! 1631 North Mellwood Ave. 502.540.4940 � www.eyediashop.com 502.895.2733 November 1-30 Clater Jewelers Diamond Center Celebrating 62 years in business! 502.426.0077 � Westport Village www.claterjewelers.com November 1-30 Korrect Optical Runway Fashions Runway Fashions carries a diverse line of Designer Men/Women Clothing like Ben Marc, Audry B, and Stacy Adams. Gentlemen, you can be stylish and distinguished in our Vittorio St. Angelo Line. A portion of the proceeds from our store goes toward Autism Society of America. DCFW is our 2011/2012 collaborating partner. 2425 Bardstown Road � Louisville, KY 40205 502.451.5651 www.runwayfashionsinc.com --ADVERTISEMENT-- See and be seen in spectacular new styles! 502.895.2020 November 1-30 � 502.451.5651 Runway Fashions Fall Special. 20% Off Storewide Sale. (Mention Ad at checkout for a free gift.) Tis the Season...to be Stressed WayS To Cope By Cheryl Stuck T DID YOU EXPERIENCE ANY OF THE FOLLOWING? Based on results from a poll of Advisory Group Members Depression Insomnia or sleeping too much o he holiday season can be a joyous time. But, in addition to the everyday problems we face, plus the unique circumstances of each person's life that create stress, the extra demands of shopping, entertaining, and attending parties and events can take their toll. Stress can make you feel frazzled, overwhelmed, and may affect your health. PAGE 56 SymptomS of StreSS physical signs Are you experiencing aches and pains, like headaches, muscle aches, or chest pain? If it's chest pain, be sure to see your doctor to rule out a heart attack before assuming it's stress. � Fatigue � Change in sex drive � Stomach upset, diarrhea, or constipation � Sleep problems � Hair loss � Weight loss or weight gain � Frequent colds � Skin conditions, like eczema � Mood changes � Anxiety or restlessness � Lack of motivation � Irritability or anger � Overly emotional, sadness, or depression � Tense or frozen feeling � Inability to concentrate � Feeling overwhelmed � Lonely or isolated feelings Behavior � Are you over-eating or under-eating? � Do you have angry outbursts? � Are you drinking more alcohol than usual or taking drugs (more than medically recommended or using illegal substances)? � Are you withdrawing from friends and family? � Are you exhibiting nervous habits, like nail biting or pacing? Irritability 18 Change in sex drive 7 13 8 32 6 Overeating or undereating 5 8 Coping with stress � Plan breaks for yourself. Make leisure time a necessity, not a luxury. � Learn to say no. You can't do everything for everyone. Choose only the projects or volunteer efforts you have the time and the energy for. Delegate if necessary. � Increase physical activity. � Learn relaxation techniques, meditation, yoga, or Tai Chi. � Improve your diet. � Don't be reluctant to ask for help. Aches and pains (i.e. headaches, chest pain, etc.) Hair loss Skin problems Stomach problems Advisory group members are: Margie Beeler � Susan Boddy � Christie Bollinger, RN � Sherrice Bond � Kim Broecker � Jennifer Brown � Linda Burry � Kimberly Carpenter, DC � Tamella Buss Cassis, MD � Holly Clark � Stacy Cohen, RN � Diane Collins, RN � Pat Cooke � Funmilayo Dixon � Laurie Duesing � Kelly Davis Fleenor � Tanya Franklin, MD � Julie Garrison, MBA � Carol Graham, MD � Dawn Hayden � Pam Hayden, RN � Mary Haynes � Gretchen Houchin � Mary Jennings � Alexis Karageorge, MD � Dee Jay Kelly � Tomiko Coates Kiefer � Diane Kissel � Kristi Jedlicki Levenhagen � Melissa Little � Sean Maguire, MD � Geri Manning � Lisa Mattingly � David McArthur � Anne McReynolds � Tara Morris � Maria Munoz � Tina Nuttall, MBA, FACHE � Denise Orwick, RPh � Betsy Paulley � Mae Pike � Leesa Richardson, MD � Ticonna Roberts � Cheryl Scanlon � Rhonda Sigler � Burke Stephens � Rebecca Terry, MD � Myrdin Thompson � Deborah Tuggle � Lannette VanderToll � Jessica Walker � Marine Walls � Janie Biagi Watts � Cenia L. Wedekind � Anthony Westmoreland, RPh � Cathi Wiley � Kathy Wilkinson � Debbie Williams � Allison Young, LMT 54 NOVEMBER 2011 TOday's WOMaN www.iamtodayswoman.com 2011 NOVEMBER 55 PAGE 54 Our Today's Woman of Wellness Health advisory group talks about how they deal with everyday stress. "The healthier I eat, the better I feel. In the moment I may feel like something sweet or less healthy would be comforting or healing, but in the end I would feel worse if I chose badly. Making good food choices is something I can control. "I make time at least once per day to read the Bible or another spiritual writing piece. I do something good for myself, like treat myself to a pedicure or to the flavor of the month mocha, do something kind for someone, and make some me-time, my time and my time alone. Journaling also helps." Holly ClArk, Employee Assistance and Work-life Program at Humana o louisville women who participated in our stress survey experienced stress caused by business and job pressures, money problems, relationship problems, time management, raising children, sick family members or caretaking responsibilities, selling a home, health-related issues, death, and divorce. While many women reach for the chocolate or fattening comfort foods when feeling stressed out, that temporary relief could backfire. university of louisville assistant professor and physician at louisville Women's Healthcare, tanya franklin, MD, talked about her own diet as it relates to stress. "if my diet is high in oils and fats, then i feel fatigued and unable to accomplish all of the tasks i need to in a day's time. When i am unable to accomplish my tasks, it leaves me feeling more stressed than before. i try to eat protein for energy that lasts throughout the day. i also try to eat more fruits and vegetables for complex carbohydrates, vitamins, and nutrients. i take a multivitamin for active women to feel energized for the tough day ahead of me." to de-stress at the end of the day, Dr. franklin spends quiet time in the car. "i don't listen to music," she said. "silence is helpful to de-stress at the end of a long, hard day. i tell patients that it is very important for them to seek a hobby or exercise to de-stress. stress can have an impact on their immune system due to poor diet or lack of sleep and make them susceptible to illness." "I leave some days of the week blank. No sports, clubs, or activities for my children." JEnnifEr BroWn, Homemaker "Walking my dog, watching my soap opera, and reality television help to release my mental stress." MElissA littlE, Co-owner of little Eatz llC "When I feel stressed out, I ask myself three questions: 1) Are you hungry? If I am, I eat. 2) Are you tired? If I am, I figure out how I can get rest as quickly as possible. 3) Is there some chore or obligation you should be addressing that you are avoiding? If the answer is yes, then I tackle whatever I've been avoiding. If the answer to all these questions is no, I go for a long walk. Physically exerting myself, either by walking the dog or going to the gym, always relieves my stress." lAuriE DuEsinG, Part-time latin instructor at university of louisville and louisville Classical Academy "I take five-minute stretch breaks. I also breathe through my nose, hold for 10 seconds, then slowly breathe out through my mouth. Five times of each of these and the stress in my neck is released." GEri MAnninG, independent sales for BeautiControl image & sPA, Evolv Health and Wellness Next month, 20 members of our group will share health inspirations. 56 NOVEMBER 2011 TOday's WOMaN 2011: The hunT for The perfeCT Salad Warm Brussels Sprouts Salad I Story and Photo By Melissa Donald f you're like me, it gets harder and harder to eat a cold leafy salad during the cooler months of the year. On a crisp, cold evening when it's raining outside or there is a light flurry in the air, the last thing I want to do is eat a salad that consists mainly of cold mixed, refrigerated greens. More and more people are reinventing and redefining the term salad, and coming up with many different alternatives to a bed of typical lettuce greens. In this particular salad, I am proudly presenting a green that most people cringe over when they hear the term. And yet, this green is a powerful vegetable that, when prepared correctly, is super delicious and extremely nutritious. I am talking about Brussels sprouts. Those little, bright, green cabbages that make people either crinkle their noses or stick out their tongues. Yes, Brussels sprouts have had their share of discrimination, but I hope I can change the way you feel about eating these wonderful vegetables. First and foremost, one cup of Brussels sprouts contributes to 15 percent of our daily allowance of fiber, which helps lower cholesterol and aids in digestion. They are also high in Vitamins A, C, E, and K. These essential vitamins help support and boost our immune system, maintain healthy bones, protect our eyesight, and act as an antiinflammatory agent. I am assuming most of you are turned off by Brussels sprouts based on the way you first tried them. Let me guess...greens boiled to death and then presented all mushy and bitter. Perhaps with a plop of butter and sprinkled with a dash of seasoning. Well, it is time to try them again, and I encourage you to try this recipe below that our good friend Mary Wheatley, owner of Cook With Mary, created. This is a fantastic starter for any holiday feast or for when you just want to prepare a salad on a cold winters night. It can nicely serve as a meal itself, and with all the nutrients and antioxidants it supplies, what better dish to prepare during the winter season? Try it for yourself and see...it's a true gift to your body. Cook With Mary's WarM Brussels sprouts salad 1 head radicchio, cored and large outer leaves removed 2 medium shallots, sliced crosswise into rings 2 Tbsp olive oil 1 lb fresh Brussels sprouts, trimmed and sliced lengthwise into �" slices 4 Tbsp good quality balsamic vinegar Salt and pepper to taste 2 Tbsp pine nuts 4 Tbsp pomegranate seeds, dried cranberries, or minced dried cherries Rinse the large radicchio leaves, and wrap in a clean dishtowel until ready to serve. Keep chilled if service time is more than a few minutes. Bring a large pot of water to a boil and salt lightly. Drop the Brussels sprouts into the boiling water and cook for 2-3 minutes or until just slightly tender and bright green. using a slotted spoon, remove the sprouts to a large bowl of ice water. Stir gently until the sprouts are chilled. Drain well and reserve. In a saut� pan, heat the olive oil over medium heat and saut� the shallots until soft and beginning to caramelize. Add the Brussels sprouts and saut� until warm, adding salt and pepper to taste. Drizzle with the balsamic and stir to coat. Place a radicchio leaf on a plate. Spoon in about � cup or more of the Brussels sprouts mixture. Drizzle with additional balsamic, if desired, then garnish with the pomegranate seeds and pine nuts. Serves 8-10. Approximate Nutritional Information per serving based on 8 servings: Calories: 74, Total Fat: 5g (only .5g of saturated fat), Fiber: 2g, Protein: 2g, Cholesterol: 0g NOVEMBER 2011 TOday's WOMaN 58 www.iamtodayswoman.com a dose of reality S by Bob Mueller Though you are certain that you are the center of the universe, you might acknowledge that you ought to travel to another planet. ometimes I need a dose of reality and have to laugh at myself. Life is a gift to you. Your life can be a blessing to others. Your character is the wrapping that the gifts of your soul are packaged in. Make it a work of art. The world will be a better place if you do. At the same time, realize the following important doses of reality. Nobody is thinking about you. Yes, I know you are certain that your friends are becoming your enemies; that your grocer, garbage collector, clergy, sister-in-law, and your dog are all of the opinion that you have put on weight, that you have lost your touch, and that you have lost your mind. Furthermore, you are convinced that everyone spends two-thirds of every day commenting on your disintegration, denigrating your work, and plotting your assassination. I promise you. Nobody is thinking about you. They are thinking about themselves, just like you. It's not about you. It's not about you is a simple rule to follow if you concentrate on the question or the occasion at hand and ask yourself: What is required here? Though you are certain that you are the center of the universe, you might acknowledge that you ought to travel to another planet. It doesn't matter. Whatever you think matters, doesn't. Follow this rule, and it will add decades to your life. It does not matter if you are late, or early; if you are here, or if you are there; if you said it, or did not say it; if you were clever, or if you were stupid; if you are having a bad hair day, or a no hair day; if your boss looks at you cockeyed; if your girlfriend or boyfriend looks at you cockeyed; if you are cockeyed; if you don't get that promotion, or prize, or house, or if you do. It doesn't matter. We prepare for weddings, but not for marriage. We prepare for childbirth, but not for becoming parents. And we get seriously involved without having any real idea of who it is we might be getting involved with! If you are contemplating making a commitment, or reviewing a commitment within an existing relationship, give yourself the luxury of time to go deeply into the following questions. You are not looking for the perfect person or total reassurance. What you are doing is giving yourself a chance to choose more consciously and wisely, and to assess more realistically what the strengths and challenges of the relationship might be. You might want to use your journal to explore these questions of the following doses of reality: � Does the idea of being in love make me happy, or is it this actual person? � Am I willing to accept this person and not attempt to change him or her? � Does he or she want to change me? � What values do we share? How are those values lived out? � What interests do we have in common, beyond the interest of having a relationship? � Is there anything that fits a less than positive pattern in my relationship life? � Do I like his or her friends, family, or lifestyle more than I like him or her? � Do we share a sense of humor? � Do we share a view of what commitment means? � Have we talked about the big issues like children, families, and money? Remember that the goal of transformation is profound peace and loving relationships. You don't need all this aggravation just to fulfill the need to be right or to be admired. Just push the wheel forward. The world will be a better place if you do. BOB MuEllER is associate vice president of Mission & stewardship at Hosparus, the community hospices of louisville, southern Indiana, and Central Kentucky. He has three books available: Look Forward Hopefully, The Gentle Art of Caring, and his latest, Create a Better World. Find Bob online at www.bobmueller.org and email him at firstname.lastname@example.org. 60 NOVEMBER 2011 TOday's WOMaN 4 change Your Life now! Light Up Your holiday noT To MISS THIS MonTH THInGS Take in the wonderful feeling of the season at the Festival of Trees & Lights -- and get a jumpstart on your holiday shopping. The annual event will feature decorated Christmas trees, wreaths, and hand-crafted holiday items for sale. Plus, your kids will not be able to resist the sweet shop and fun activities. All proceeds benefit the neonatal intensive care unit at Kosair Children's Hospital. When November 11-13 Where Louisville Slugger Field tickets $3 for children under 12 and senior citizens (65+); $5 for adults contact www.HelpKosairChildrensHospital.com for a complete listing of events and times. 2 # 1 # Nikki Fouch, Before Nikki Fouch, After -- by Tiffany White F.A.T. Friday Holiday Hop Benefitting Blessings in a Backpack Frankfort Avenue will host the F.A.T Friday Holiday Hop to benefit Blessings in a Backpack, an organization that is designed to feed elementary school children who have little or no food on the weekends. Through this program, it costs only $80 to feed one American school child for an entire school year. Participating businesses in the area will collect money donations or backpacks. Anyone who brings a donation will receive a discount on their purchases. Many businesses will also host live music and refreshments. Parking is free and trolley hours have been extended for this special event. November 25; Trolley's extended hours: 11am to 10:30pm Frankfort, Story, and Mellwood Avenue tickets free contact www.fatfridayhop.org When Where 3 # When Where We're looking for our next group of Ready to Change Your Life contestants. If you want to improve the way you look and feel, this is the time to do it. Flip to page 20 for details on how to nominate yourself! Attend the Hollydays Art & Gift Market This month, we're giving away French lessons and samplings of food from Los Monitos Language Center as part of their Destination France: A Full Day of French Food in Four Weeks package. Experts will teach you how to order food in French. You'll also learn about and taste traditional fare from four French mealtimes. Go to our facebook page (www.facebook.com/todayswomanmagazine) for more details. Day of the Dead Celebration In conjunction with the First Friday Trolley Hop, the Kentucky Museum of Art and Craft will host a Di� de los Muertos (Day of the Dead) celebration. Events include food, live music, sugar skull and tissue flower workshops, puppets, face painting, public altars, Flamenco and fire dancers, a candlelit march, and much more. Guests are encouraged to wear costumes and masks. November 4 from 5-10pm Kentucky Museum of Art & Craft tickets Free contact www.kentuckyarts.org or 502.589.0102 can You say Win in French? This season, put your money to good use by attending the Junior League of Louisville's Hollydays Art & Gift Market next month. You can find the perfect gift for someone without trudging through the crowded malls. When December 2-4 (times vary) Where Mellwood Art & Entertainment Center tickets $10 on December 2; $5 on December 3-4 contact www.juniorleaguelouisville.org 3rd Annual Winter Wonderland Arts & Crafts Show Handmade crafts and jewelry will be on display. The event will feature silent auctions, concessions, children's activities, and more. November 5 from 9am-2pm Portland Christian School East Campus, 8509 Westport Road tickets Free contact email@example.com When Where 4 # Follow the Fun to Win Become a follower of our Today's Family Everyday blog for a chance to win one of several prizes you and your family will love. If you are lucky, you could walk away with our grand prize: tickets to Gaylord Opryland. Go to www.todaysfamilyeveryday.com for more details. If you would like to include your event in our upcoming issue, send it to Calendar@iamtodayswoman.com. Please include a hi-res jpeg image (photo should be 300 dpi at 4x6 size). We must receive your information at least 6 weeks in advance. No phone calls, please. 62 noVEmBER 2011 Today's Woman www.iamtodayswoman.com 2011 noVEmBER 63 Arts InsIder Must-see BY GIoIA PATTon SuE GRAfToN S is for Storyteller "Y PHOTO: Laurie rOberTs "i consider it a history of my hairstyle. and it's hysterical when i look back over some of my old book jacket pictures. i think `why didn't somebody tell me!' in fact i'm very careful to do a fresh photograph for each book, because i think my readers are entitled to know how i'm holding up." -- 71-year-old New York Times Best-Selling author Sue Grafton ou probably didn't know that many of my Grafton she reacts by saying excitreaders are Kinsey Millhone!" begins an edly "Yes...exactly! The danger amused sounding Sue Grafton, speaking about I experience is that when I finish the beloved fictional private investigator characan (alphabet) book I honestly ter at the helm of Grafton's New York Times think `that's the end!' I truly have WHAT: Sue Grafton will sign V is for best-selling alphabet series of novels. no other ideas...no clue what I'm Vengeance WHEN: Sunday, Nov. 27 @ "Many (readers) assure me that's who they going to do. So I then have to sort 2pm WHERE: Carmichael's Bookstore are," continues Grafton about Millhone, whom of build up my strength and (2720 Frankfort Ave.) the author says her readers are happy to identify my courage again to tackle the with "because Kinsey is a character who takes no next job." gruff in the world. (Pause) I'm not bragging or Asked how often (or not) she self-serving," remarks the Louisville native, speaking by phone, experiences `writer's block,' Grafton quips: "only once...daily, "but having said that modestly (laughs), I think the readers' attracdear. But..." she says suddenly, "you see what I have learned is tion to Kinsey is because she is so down to earth. She's not pretenthat writer's block is really a friend. That is Shadow's way of telltious...not full of herself. She has a job to do and she does it, and ing me that I am off course. So that's important. So instead of you know she pays her bills, and you know (that) she cares about dreading (the block) I just consider it a message from my unconhonor and justice. Kinsey is also someone who is not afraid about scious. And then I know it's time to sit down and pay attention." being afraid. I think what I am assuming readers like about her, is, The Shadow reference Grafton mentioned, she explains, "is the in part, her candor. Her view of the world is sort of assuming Jungian term for the id or the subconscious, and it is what I write because (laughs) she is sooo outspoken," explains the writer, who by. And she serves me best when nobody else is paying attention. began her alphabet series with A is for Alibi in 1982, and whose She is very strict, and that's a good thing. I tell you that I have V is for Vengeance drops november 14. operated with this system for many years. So late at night she'll As to why the Millhone books are set in the 1980s decade, she pipe up and make a suggestion or two, and I know that if I don't explains: "When I wrote and published A is for Alibi, it was 1982, obey she...will...punish...me," the novelist says, mock dramatically. so it was the present. But I did decide to age Kinsey one year for Rather then take a much deserved extended vacation a few every two-and-a-half books. And that's why her life has proceeded months after the release of Z is for Zero, Grafton told her fans at such a pace. And I'm really jealous of that, I must say. But since that she'll embark upon a cross country book tour instead. "And she ages so slowly, little by little I have crept into the past," what we'll do is group therapy, so we can all get used to the idea Grafton adds, "so now I'm writing historical novels really -- that the alphabet has come to an end," she says sympathetically. if you think about it," she jokes. "I know (they'll) start signing up for the tour soon as they're Grafton mentions that it took her five years to write A is for already suffering separation anxiety." Alibi, "because, at that point, I had had a long stint working in With 22 of the 26 novels of the series already completed I can't Hollywood writing for television, and it was driving me insane, help but wonder if Grafton is excited or dreading the thought of because I realized belatedly that I am not a team player. (Sighs) saying a final `adios!' to the scrappy P.I. on the closing pages of I was so cranky at that point, so I realized that if I did not rescue Z is for Zero, which Grafton says she's thinking of ending on new myself...find a way to go back to solo writing, I was going to be Years Eve 1990, just four months shy of Millhone's 40 th birthday. ruined." "I'm not sure if is going to be goodbye, as I can't imagine my I tell Grafton that I'd purposely chosen to interview her now life without writing," she answers. "And readers are fretting rather than wait until Z is for Zero was about to drop, because about it. They have been sooo worried (laughs). And what I am I thought it more interesting to talk with her while she was still in saying now, and I think is true is that if I write about Kinsey after the process of creating the series. Z is for Zero, I just will not do linking titles. That seemed to be "Yes, exactly!" she concurs enthusiastically. "Talk now because such a keen idea when I came up with it," she deadpans, here's my concern -- I don't want to still be writing if the juice is "although I'm now going `what was I thinking?' But the truth is, I gone. I have seen writers plow diligently onward long after they didn't think it would work," she admits. "How was I supposed to should have given up," she says with a groan. "So I don't want to know?" be one of those writers. But I'm hoping that if it's over before it's Grafton concludes: "In some ways I think I'm committed to over, somebody will have the good grace to shoot me." Ms. Millhone for life. She is a jealous mistress (sighs), and I don't Grafton's last comments about writers instantly brings to mind know that she would tolerate my taking any other route. When the much-used show business metaphor `jumping the shark,' which I'm asked to make judgments about Kinsey -- often I'll duck those was coined in the 1980s after the long-running hit sitcom Happy questions, because my opinion of her doesn't matter. It's her Days proved they'd overstayed their welcome after creating a now opinion of me..." infamous episode in which the Fonz character platform-jumped on GIOIA PATTON IS AN ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT CELEBRITY PROFILER. water skis over some sharks. When I share that metaphor with 64 noVEmBER 2011 Today's Woman www.iamtodayswoman.com 2011 noVEmBER 65 Cookie Mani a Heather christo's chocolate ginger cookie -- recipe found on our Facebook page: www.facebook.com/todayswomanmagazine By Carmen Brown if you've been looking for a fun activity to do with your children or with friends, consider the cookie. Baking cookies is a great way to create lasting memories, and it is not as difficult as you might think. Decorating tips from Heather christo, star chef and entertaining expert: 1 my first tip is to set everything up before you begin, because once you start -- it is fast work. I like to have my royal icing (a hard white icing) in squeeze bottles or a small bowl, my off-set spatulas ready and small bowls of sprinkles prepared. I also like to decorate over a sheet pan, so that it catches all of the stray sprinkles from bouncing to the floor! 2 Using the traditional royal icing: you can tint the icing with any color of food coloring, and pipe or spread it on the cookies, then, while still wet, sprinkle in strategic areas. Sometimes you should just ice and sprinkle in some areas, and then wait to dry before doing a second or third section so the sprinkles won't mix. 3 I also love to ice cookies in white and let the royal icing dry to hard (overnight) and then use food coloring pens to draw on them. It is just like using a fine tipped pen, so you can be as detailed as you want! 4 I also love the look (and taste!) of just sprinkling cut cookies with sugars before you bake them. while colored sugars are festive and fun for children, you can create some very elegant sugar cookies by just sprinkling them with regular table sugar, or some of the larger crystal sugars that are easy to find (including maple sugar, demera, and vanilla sugar) Today's Woman Cookie Party Craze 66 here's nothing more basic and nothing people love more than chocolate chip cookies," says Helen Friedman, 25-year owner of Desserts by Helen. "The aroma of baking cookies often reminds people of comforting and loving times of baking with Cookie parties are mothers or their kids." popping up as a new twist If you are a first-time baker, cookies are a good way to gain on traditional gatherings. some confidence. Helen says to remember that baking is sometimes Christmas Cookie exchanges, a trial-and-error process. Have fun and laugh if things do not go as for example, invite guests to expected. bring large batches of one type To help you and your cookie crew get started, here are Helen's of cookie. at the end of the top tips for creating the perfect cookie: night, you get to take home � when pre-heating your oven, make sure to set the oven an assortment of homemade temperature just right. If it is too cold, the cookies will flatten. treats to enjoy. Because they � The procedure is very important when baking your cookies. each are small and the recipe can ingredient should be added in order, but not all at the same time. be easily changed to fit your � you can change up your basic recipe. Get creative! Just about any needs, cookies are sure to dry good can be added; try cranberries, cherries, or any type of nut. make your next party a blast. � Use parchment paper over your cookie sheet. make sure to lightly Helen says to adjust how spray with oil to keep the bottom of your cookies from sticking. your serve your cookies � Teaspoons are fine when placing your cookies on the sheet. However, depending on the theme using a scoop will help with uniformity of size. of your party. "Try a silver � remember to put adequate space between your cookies. This will serving tray with cookies on give them room to spread while baking. small doilies for a more formal � Set your timer for a few minutes less than what is recommended party. Small cookies work for baking. For example, if the recipe calls for a 15-minute bake, great for tea gatherings or set your timer for 12 minutes. after checking the cookies, add parties for younger children." time if more baking is necessary. remember, if you over-bake your you can encourage your cookies, you cannot do anything about it. guests to help with decorations or come up with cookie-related Helen's simple chocolate chip cookie recipe (makes 36 cookies) game ideas. also, if you ingreDients: cream butter with both sugars are using invitations, list � lb butter until light and fluffy. add vanilla, different ingredients 1 c light brown sugar then eggs, and mix well. sift the flour on each one for your � c sugar and baking soda together. add to the guests to bring. you can 2 tsp vanilla extract butter and sugar mixture. Fold in nuts increase the amounts 2 large eggs and chocolate chunks. Drop the dough from the recipe to make 2 c flour on parchment paper that has been sure everyone gets to 1 tsp baking soda lightly sprayed. Bake your cookies for take home a few of your 1 � c chopped nuts about 15 minutes. masterpieces. 1 � lb chocolate chunks enjoy! noVEmBER 2011 "T www.iamtodayswoman.com 2011 noVEmBER 67 Recommended For Holiday Gifts By AngelA Mullins Boggs MArthA neAl Cooke artha neal Cooke, co-owner of eyedia, and former co-owner, hawley-Cooke Booksellers: "At the moment, i would love to recommend a recently released book on Bernheim Arboretum and research Forest, appropriately named BERNHEIM. sharon receveur and tavia Cathcart masterfully compiled a remarkable history of Bernheim through archival photographs. it's a wonderful testament to philanthropy of land and dedicated to the next generation who will soon be the stewards of our natural world. it is the perfect gift book" M Terri Weber erika Chavez Graziano e rika Chavez-graziano, owner, Cellar Door Chocolates : "i think The Portable Dorothy Parker would make a wonderful Christmas gift. this collection of short stories is peppered with so many great one-liners. i will be carrying a few books about chocolate for Christmas: Bittersweet, by Alice Medrich; Making Artisan Chocolates, by Andrew garrison shotts; Chocolate & Confections, by Peter B. greweling; and Truffles, by Dede Wilson." erri Weber, member relationship manager, greater louisville, inc.: "i personally find The Last Lecture, by randy Pausch, a book everyone should read. it is an inspirational book. it makes you look at your childhood dreams. Can any of these dreams now be fulfilled as you are an adult? in his book, he talks about the people that influenced him. this book makes you look at people who have influenced you, but also who you are influencing. What wisdom do you want to leave behind? it reminds me to make my Bucket list. "i also enjoy sue grafton's books, author of the Kinsey Millhone mystery series. i highly recommend this louisville (Atherton graduate) author of the `alphabet series' ("A" Is for Alibi, etc. "V" is for Vengeance (due out this month). grafton's novels have been published in 28 countries and in 26 languages. these are quick, easy mysteries with a female private eye named kinsey Millhone. "A Pearl in the Storm, by tori Murden McClure. this book is inspirational. you learn from your mistakes and failures. this is a book that makes you understand how strong and determined you can be. this is a book about courage, exploring, and personal discovery." PAge 70 t 68 NOVEMBER 2011 o TOday's WOMaN www.iamtodayswoman.com 2011 noVEmBER 69 o PAGE 68 TErI BIrK ary Hunt, executive director, The Library Foundation: "Two books come to mind immediately. The first is Saving Kentucky, by Sally Van Winkle Campbell. It's about people and families who understand and who are devoted to the preservation of our land and our way of life. The photography by Thomas Hart Shelby is compelling and beautiful. Everyone who considers Kentucky home should have this book. The second book I would give as a gift would be a splurge, but would certainly be worth it, Snowy Owl Gathers in Her Trove, by Nana Lampton. The limited edition book includes poems and illustrations by Ms. Lampton and is designed by Julius Friedman. It is a joy to read, to look at, and to touch. The poems are handset type, and each book is hand-bound by Ms. Lampton and Mr. Friedman. If you're looking for a book that's also a piece of art, this is it." Mary HuNT M eri Birk, owner, A+Tutoring: "Christmas In Plains by Jimmy Carter. One of the most charming little Christmas books I've ever read. "Simple Abundance by Sarah Ban Breathnach is my all-time go-to book. It's on my nightstand, I read it between books. It's day by day reading, not pious, but makes you aware of the abundance and joy around, not gotten from shopping or anything outside of your regular daily walk. "I just got this at Half Price Books, Simplify Your Life: 100 Ways to Slow Down & Enjoy The Things That Really Matter, by Elaine St James. 100 little things, one per page. Good to pick up and read before bed and go to sleep on. "The Little House series by Laura Ingalls Wilder. I taught fourth, fifth, and sixth grades, and would read these to my class. I recommend the series for girls, but the boys liked them also. T ue McNally, director of public relations, The Vimarc Group, and professor, Ivy Tech Community College: "The Coal Tattoo, by Silas House. He's a Kentucky writer. It's a wonderful book about two sisters. "Ahab's Wife by Sena Jeter Nasland. It's amazing. She's here in Louisville. It's my favorite, but all her books are good. It's beautiful. There's a great story. "My all time favorite book is Ellen Foster by Kaye Gibbons. It's about a little girl who is a foster child. "When I have to give a gift for a man, it's Nobody's Fool by Richard Russo. It also vies for my favorite of all time. It is about a character named Sully. He messes up but he's so good hearted, and the whole town depends on him. It was a movie with Paul Newman." SuE MCNaLLy S J udy Fout, owner, A Reader's Corner Bookstore: "For girls, Silverlicious, by Victoria Kann. For boys, The Lost Hero by Rick Riordan. And also 200 Under 200: 200 Recipes Under 200 Calories by Lisa Lillien." A ngela Calery, owner/operator, Bluegrass Outdoor Traders: "I'm reading Born to Run by Christopher McDougall right now. It's very inspirational. I think I got it as a Christmas gift last year. Outdoor books are my fave gifts (hiking, local kayaking etc). Here's another -- What To Eat, Marion Nestle. I also like the Michael Pollan books, The Omnivore's Dilemma." 70 NOVEMBER 2011 Judy FouT aNGELa CaLEry www.iamtodayswoman.com 2011 noVEmBER 71 Q: My daughter was in the shower and her phone was ringing like crazy. texts were pouring in one after another. i never look at her phone because she typically takes it with her everywhere she goes. We respect one another's privacy and besides, we have no secrets -- or, at least i thought we didn't. therefore, i thought nothing of grabbing her phone to see if it was something she needed to take care of immediately. now, i wish i hadn't. i think what i saw was sexting. it was several texts of some very sexually explicit language -- from a host of her peers. these girls and boys are only 15 and 16 years old! i was shocked! Mortified! But most of all, i am devastated. now, i'm faced with the dilemma of confessing to her that i invaded her privacy, but more than that i must now address my daughter's sexual misconduct. i'm unsure where to begin. please give me some suggestions about how to address this issue. Just Ask Joyce BY JoYCE oGLESBY JoycE: It's pretty telling of the culture in which we live when our children's phones make us blush! What you actually saw may not be "sexting" in its truest definition. The more accurate definition of sexting is to "send sexually explicit messages in the form of photos and/or video via cell phone or instant messenger." This behavior can be punishable by law. Whereas what you have described doesn't sound like this sort of inappropriate behavior, it does not negate the concern you rightfully are expressing as a parent regarding this issue. A few pointers worth considering: � Even the best of kids will conceal inappropriate behavior from their parents. By adolescent years, kids have usually lost the innocence of "fessing up" for their wrongs. Growing up in a minister's home was no immunity for our two daughters. They still exhibited "less-than-angelic" conduct at times. Most children will disappoint you at some level someday, so it's always a good idea to trust with a watchful eye. � Consider it a blessing to have discovered this dilemma quite by accident. You have a chance to protect your daughter; carpe diem! Trust me, this may well be your last opportunity to be warned about untoward behavior. (She'll be much more careful henceforth!) � Get your facts about what has been going on. It may be time to gather phone records. You could certainly encourage her to "spill the beans," so to speak, by letting her know you can gather such records. All records can be secured from email, Facebook, and phone calls. You'd be amazed what kind of history one can retrieve of historical communication. She could possibly be more willing to come forth with truth rather than have you do all the PI work yourself. � Dad needs to know. You need the male perspective he can provide. Even if he's going to be crushed in spirit and/or furious, you will appreciate his partnering up with you to address this critical matter. � Get to know your daughter's friends. Quickly. Have them into your home. Invite them to dinner. Take them shopping. observe their behavior. It may be at its finest initially, but given enough exposure to become familiar with surroundings, the true self typically surfaces. If you find her taste in friends undesirable, revert to a triedand-proven standard some parents have mislaid in today's world: "My house, my rules!" � Your daughter needs to understand the significance of respecting herself. Everything she says and does is a reflection of her character, and that character will follow her for a very long time. The mistakes young girls/guys make are often reflected in physical, emotional, and even spiritual consequences in adulthood. � Remember that tough love calls for tough measures. You won't be popular with her right now. She won't count you as a friend, and for a while may not regard you as a good parent. At least, not out loud. � Kids not only need boundaries, but they want them. Be the scapegoat for your daughter. Tell her to use you as an excuse for why she is restricted on her cell phone or why she no longer has texting privileges. (That should be part of your tough love measures.) Your shield is the greatest protection she will have. � Keep the pulse on your daughter. She's yours, and today she's still under your roof. Regardless of your good parenting skills, she may still decide to compromise her reputation, character, and morals. While on your watch, you get limited control. I encourage you to exercise every ounce of it! Q: oNLINE My 36-year-old husband has decided to pursue another career and is going to school in another state. he initially said he would be sending for me and our son when he got an apartment, secured a job, and had gotten readjusted to college life. he has been there for more than two months. he moved in with three single roommates and says it is a temporary situation. he has no job yet. he has completely drained our savings. he goes out drinking with his buddies every night and plays videogames during the day. college is now in session, so he's "cut back" on his night life. now he's thinking we should stay put and wait on him to finish since it's only going to be a year. (that's assuming he doesn't fail any classes. he's already complaining it is too difficult and may take him longer). i have a good job, and i work very hard at providing income for the three of us. i am coming up short each month trying to sustain two lifestyles. i feel conflicted about whether to pull up stakes and go to him, but i don't trust what might be happening out of my sight. My son is established in school, and my family lives in this area. should i leave my job and guard my husband, or should i stay and take the chance on him cheating on me? (Go to www.iamtodayswoman.com to read Joyce's answer to this question.) 72 noVEmBER 2011 Today's Woman www.iamtodayswoman.com 2011 noVEmBER 73 Designer Handbags Real or Fake? BY TIFFANY WHITE / PHOTOS BY MELISSA DONALD Could you determine which of these is and isn't a non designer handbag? Choosing a designer or non-designer handbag doesn't matter as long as you find one that looks good and fits your price range. If you cHooSE A NoN-DESIGNER HANDbAG If there is no room in your budget to buy a Coach or Kate Spade handbag, take a look at some of the attractive non-designer bags on the market. Amanda Dickerson, manager of Divas (2420 Lime Kiln Lane, Suite D, 502.426.3355), says the level of quality and longevity of non-designer handbags like the Sandra Gordon bag (above) aren't comparable to designer handbags, but they still look good. "They are really well made -- the companies are dependable. They do a great job with design and it is an ideal bag, because you are still getting the look and feel of a designer without completely draining your bank account." Sandra Roberts -- $86, available at Divas If you cHooSE A DESIGNER HANDbAG Designer handbags, says Dickerson, are a nice option for people who choose to use the same purse regularly, because they will not wear out as quickly. "If you bought the Zac Posen bag and carried it for four years it would still hold up." To maintain the appearance of any type of handbag, Dickerson says to avoid placing it on rough surfaces. When you are not using it, she suggests storing the bag in a dust cover to prevent it from fading. Zac Posen -- $495, available at Divas 74 noVEmBER 2011 Today's Woman TW SPECIAL ONLINE-ONLY ARTICLE >> An Insider's Holiday Cooking Guide TurKey grAVy 4 Tbsp of butter � cup onion � cup celery 2 cups chopped mushrooms � cup flour � cup white wine 4 cups turkey and/or chicken stock chopped herbs salt and pepper to taste �-1 cup Half'n'Half or heavy cream Begin by melting the butter in a large saut� pan. Saut� onion, celery, and mushrooms until the vegetables are thoroughly softened and onion begins to caramelize. Stir flour in until smooth. Cook for 3-4 minutes, stirring constantly. Add wine and turkey or chicken stock. Whisk and stir until smooth and heated to a full boil. Lower heat and simmer until thickened. Cool slightly, and then strain through a colander or not-too-fine sieve. Add chopped herbs, as desired and adjust with salt and pepper. If desired, stir in Half'n'Half or heavy cream. APPLe WALNuT CAKe WiTh SorghuM APPLe buTTer I have made this cake for years, after first seeing the recipe in the Courier-Journal. I adapted it first by cutting way back on the oil, adding applesauce and finishing with a maple glaze. When I started at the St. Matthews Farmers' Market, I wanted to add the Sorghum Apple Butter to this cake to see the result. Great cake, made even richer with Sorghum. 2 cups sugar 3 cups flour 1� tsp baking soda 1 tsp salt 1 tsp cinnamon 3 eggs � cup vegetable oil 1 tsp vanilla � cup Apple Sorghum Butter, apple sauce or cranberry sauce 3 cups chopped, peeled apples 1 cup chopped walnuts Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Spray a tube pan (angel food or Bundt pan) with cooking spray. Sprinkle interior with flour. In the bowl of a mixer, combine the dry ingredients. Mix together the wet ingredients. Fold dry and wet ingredients together. Fold in apples and nuts. Batter will be very thick. Pour into prepared pan. Bake at 350 degrees for about an hour. The cake may look done long before it is. Test the cake after 50 minutes with an Instant Read thermometer. It should register between 180 and 200 degrees internal temperature to assure baking is complete. Cool in pan for about 20 minutes. Run a thin bladed knife around the edges of the pan and remove first the outside. When cool enough to handle, invert the cake and reposition on a serving platter. Drizzle with Maple Icing Glaze. CrANberry reLiSh 2 2 1 2 large navel oranges red apples, cored, cut into chunks lb fresh cranberries cups sugar Peel oranges, reserving � of the zest. Chop oranges coarsely. Wash cranberries, drain and place in food processor. Add apples, sugar and reserved zest. Process until chopped. Add oranges and pulse until blended. Refrigerate until ready to serve. Additional Online-Only Recipes MAPLe iCiNg gLAZe 2 Tbsp butter 2 Tbsp milk or cream � tsp maple flavoring Confectioners' sugar Melt the butter and milk together in a measuring cup. Stir in enough confectioners' sugar to reach drizzling consistency. story and photos By Melissa donald ChoCoLATe MouSSe CAKe 4 cups chocolate wafer cookie crumbs (or Oreo cookie crumbs) 10 Tbsp unsalted butter, melted 1 lb semi sweet chocolate, melted and slightly cooled 1 quart whipping cream Mix the cookie crumbs and melted butter together until like wet sand. Press into a 10" springform pan. Form a firm bottom crust and press up the walls of the pan to nearly the top. Whip the cream until stiff peaks form. Pour in the melted chocolate and mix until totally incorporated. Pour into the prepared crust and chill overnight. Cut into 12 slices and garnish with additional whipped cream and sprinkle with cookies crumbs, if desired. Serves 12 roASTed ACorN SquASh SouP WiTh hoT & SPiCy PuMPKiN SeedS 3 Acorn Squash or Butternut Squash 6 tsp butter 6 tsp brown sugar Cinnamon, clove, as desired 1 medium sweet onion, diced 2 ribs celery, chopped 2 Tbsp olive oil 1 clove garlic, minced 6-8 fresh sage leaves, whole 3-4 cups vegetable broth Salt and Pepper to taste Generous pinch cayenne � cup heavy cream (optional) Hot and Spicy Pumpkin seeds (recipe follows) Cut squash in half lengthwise. Remove seeds and fibers. Place cut side up on a lightly greased baking sheet. Place a tsp of butter and sugar in each squash half. Season as desired. Bake at 350 degrees for 1 to 1� hours, or until very tender, brushing with the melted butter over the surface of the squash. When very tender, remove from the oven and cool. In a 3-4 quart pan, saut� onion and celery in olive oil until soft. Add garlic, sage leaves, and salt and pepper. Stir until garlic is aromatic, about 2 minutes. Scoop out flesh from the squash and add to the pan along with the broth and cayenne. Bring to a simmer and cook for 20 minutes. Cool slightly. Remove sage leaves. Transfer mixture to a food processor or blender and in two batches, process until smooth. Alternatively, use a hand held blender to puree the soup. Return to pan. When ready to serve, heat gently but thoroughly until hot. Add cream and heat through. Portion into bowls and garnish with pumpkin seeds. herb CorNbreAd dreSSiNg 1 loaf good quality white bread, cubed and dried 5-6 cups cubed, dried cornbread 1 stick butter 1 large onion, chopped 3-4 ribs celery, diced Approximately 4 cups broth Fresh sage, thyme, tarragon and parsley Salt and Pepper to taste Sugar, to taste 2 eggs Put dried breads in a large mixing bowl. Saut� onion and celery in melted butter until softened. Add chopped fresh herbs. Bring to a simmer. Let cool slightly. Pour gradually over the bread, using all the vegetables, but holding back on the liquid. Add salt and pepper to taste. Add a little sugar, if desired. Taste for seasoning. Adjust. Beat the eggs, then pour over the stuffing mixture, blending in well. Add more broth, if needed. Do not taste the uncooked dressing after adding the raw eggs. Spoon into a large, buttered casserole dish. Cover and bake at 375 degrees until heated through. Remove top and bake until brown and slightly crusty on top. SMAShed SWeeT PoTAToeS WiTh ChiPoTLe ChiLieS ANd CherVe 2 large sweet potatoes, peeled and cubed (about 1� lb.) 2 oz soft, fresh goat cheese (Cherve) 2 Tbsp unsalted butter Salt and pepper to taste �-1 Chipotle Chili in adobo sauce, seeds removed and minced Place the potatoes in a sauce pot and cover with cold water. Bring to a boil, reduce to simmer and cook until the potatoes are fork tender, about 12-15 minutes. Drain and return the potatoes to the pan. Add the remaining ingredients and cover the pan to retain heat and allow the butter and cheese to melt. Using a potato masher or electric mixer, mash the potatoes until the desired consistency is reached. Taste and adjust seasonings. Serves 4. hoT ANd SPiCy PuMPKiN SeedS � cup raw pumpkin seeds � tsp olive oil � tsp sugar � tsp cayenne pepper, chipotle powder, or chili powder Salt, sugar, and black pepper as desired Heat olive oil in small saut� pan. Add seeds and heat over medium heat until seeds just begin to pop. Drain on paper towels. Add seasonings and cool. Serve as a snack or garnish for soup or salads.