60 M E T R O S P I R I T M A Y
Classifieds
Call 738-1142 to place your Classified ad today!
Miscellaneous For Sale Bedroom Suite, dresser, chest of drawers & headboard. All
8 3 pieces $50.00 912-829-3226 or 912-829-4556 2 0 0 3
(07/10#8105) ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Snap-On IM51 Air Impact Wrench, 1/2” drive, good condition, $75.00. National Detroit DA Air Sander, good condition, $60.00 Ask for Larry (813)391-9580. (07/10#8106) ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Tons of Cloth! All types/pat terns good grade material. Will sell all for $35.00, 912-829-3226 or 912-829-4556 (07/10#8104) ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Dining Room Table - Never used, rectangular solid light wood. Seats 4-6, paid $200.00, sell for $75.00 OBO. Silver Sony CD Car Stereo, w/ remote, paid $200.00, sell for $75.00 OBO. 706-799-0417. (06/26#8083)) ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Black Magnum Lace up Boots. New, never worn. Perfect for public safety officers. Sizes 9 1/2 and 10. $30.00 each. 706798-7954. (06/26#8084) ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Genuine English (Raleigh) Lightweight ladies touring bike. Very good condition. $35.00, needs new tires, call Maddie 860-4745. (06/12#8073) ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– GE Refrigerater, runs great, looks OK, $35.00 Delivery available ex tra charge. Call 706-793-1563. (06/12#8071) ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Infiniti floor speakers, with tweeter, midrange, woofer and passive radiator, $125, Call 869-8931. (06/05#8063) ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Recliner, blue, fair condition $25.00. Dinet te table w/ 4 chairs $40.00 Call 706-868-9827. (06/05#8064) ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Sony five CD carousel with remote, box, manual, works great, $75, call 869-8931. (06/05#8061)
Baritone Brass Instrument w/ case, good condition, $700.00 Please call 803-652-8312, between 7 pm & 9 pm. (05/29#8052) ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Antique Sewing Machine Tables with oak tops. (40” X 20” & 30” X 30”) Excellant condition, $50 each. Call 706-868-1384 after 5 pm. (05/29#8050) ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Bicycle Built For Two - Trail-mate - red - excellant condition, $195.00 OBO 706-541-0656 (05/29#8051) ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Adult DVD - 10 adult DVD’s $80.00 for all. 803-648-5360 (05/29#8053) ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Bedroom dresser with large mirror $50.00; Octagan shaped lamp table $15.00; Over tub shower bench $50.00, Call 706736-7356 (05/15#8034) ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Electric Lift Chair, Recliner.Blue by Invacare. Paid $900.00 new, will sell for $500.00. Will hold a very large person. Call 790-0793. (05/08#8026) ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Four End Tables and Night Stand, very nice solid wood - All for $25.00 One large microwave and stereo receiver & speaker - All for $30.00 Call - 706-774-6400. (05/08#8027) ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Boxwood Shrub, three years old, 18 inches tall $2.50 Call 706-863-3518 (05/08#8028) ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Sears 3HP Power Reel Mower; 7 Blade Power Propelled. $150.00 Call 855-7162 (05/08#8029) ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Books - Most $2.00 - $3.00 - Lots on Holocaust - Wiesel, Levi - Others. 706 737-6219, Leave Message. (05/08#8030)
GUARANTEED CLASSIFIEDS
* Items for sale by an individual may be placed in our Guaranteed Classifieds. The same ad will run continuously for ten weeks or until the item sells, whichever comes first. You must call by 5PM on Friday every two weeks to renew the ad or The Metropolitan Spirit will assume the item has been sold and will delete the ad. There is a $5 reinstatement fee if you forget to renew your ad. All items must indicate price. Guaranteed classified ads are offered to individuals only and are not offered to commercial companies. Guaranteed Classified ads do not include any automotive vehicles, real estate or pets. RATES: FREE ADS Merchandise Under $250 $8 ADS Merchandise $251 to $500 $15 ADS Merchandise $501 to $1000 $20 ADS Merchandise over $1000 20 Words or Less - No Exceptions. ADS MUST BE PREPAID DEADLINES: In person - Monday at 3PM By mail, fax or email - Friday at 4PM
TO PLACE YOUR AD: Mail: P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, GA 30914-3809 Email: classified@metspirit.com Fax: 706-733-6663 ADS ARE NOT TAKEN BY PHONE Website: www.metspirit.com Visit Us At: 825 Russell Street, Augusta, GA MUST BE MAILED, FAXED OR EMAILED ON SPECIFIED FORM. PAYMENT OPTIONS: (ADS MUST BE PREPAID) Cash-Money Order-Check
AD PLACEMENT FORM:
Name_______________________________________Daytime Phone_____________________ Address______________________________________________________________________ City______________________________________________State________Zip_____________ Payment ❑ Cash ❑ Check ❑ Money Order ❑ Visa ❑ MC Card No./Exp. Date_____________________________________________________________ Billing Address (if different from above)_____________________________________________ City______________________________________________State________Zip_____________ Ad Copy 20 words or less________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ GENERAL POLICIES: The Metropolitan Spirit reserves the right to reject, revise, alter, or reclassify any classified advertisement. Please check your ad for errors the first week the ad is published. The Metropolitan Spirit is not responsible for any errors which appear after the first week the ad is inserted.
W
hat’s happened to love in our society? I resent that women won’t even look at a man without money. I’m a guy, 28, who’s flat broke. I’m not some lifelong bum. Of course, even when I had money, it was hard to find women who weren’t married, screwed up, or too lacking in feminine features. Now, just because I’ve fallen on hard times, even women who aren’t that attractive won’t go for me. I’ve always said a couple should live as if they are homeless: Even if you have no roof, no food, no money and no prospects, you still have one thing left. Yes, love. Shouldn’t love prevail, even in hard times? —It Isn’t the Principle
Yes, yes, love should prevail! Not only should love prevail, Rene Russo and Ashley Judd should schedule a creamed-corn wrestling match to fight it out for yours. Of course, if one or both aren’t girly enough for you, you should be able to mosey down to the nearest bar, toss a pick-up line to the most beautiful woman there, and have her follow you home like a dog on a trail of cubed steak. Choose your pick-up line carefully. Something like, “Buenos knockers,” might win you points for foreign language skills, but with, “Hey, baby, spare a quar ter?” you’ll fill your bed while filling your pockets with much-needed change. My, what a huge ... sense of entitlement you have. It’s one thing to hope that a woman who loves you will stand by you when you’re down. It’s another thing entirely to expect all womankind to line up in lawn chairs at 6 a.m., rock concer t-style, for a total stranger who’s down. No, women don’t want to hear there’s a wait where you’re taking them for dinner — especially if it’s because you’ll be standing in line at a soup kitchen. (Luckily, you’re likely to have good seats for the movie — that is, unless anybody’s standing in front of the appliance store window when you arrive.) Why are women so shallow? Pret ty much for the same reason you aren’t hit ting on chicks who are ringers for teamsters (down to the crew cut and the paunch). Contrary to the notion held by irate “flabulous” women who steer me to “fat acceptance” Web sites like “Fat!So?” (fatso.com), what men find at tractive is not a result of messages Vogue edit-atrix Anna Wintour secretly beamed into their brains. Actually, as anthropologist Donald Symons wrote, “Beauty is in the adaptations of the
beholder” — meaning that the adaptations men evolved to find beautiful are those which pointed to a woman surviving not only childbir th, but years of “Cave Mommy & Me” playgroups. Women, on the other hand, evolved to want big men on campus. Not because they’ve looked forward, for generations, to making you miserable — but because men of status and power could best suppor t their furry lit tle children. Man-hunting women should go to the gym, then slap on some Revlon — not waste their time e-whining complaints like, “What we need to hear is a collective ‘what-EVER!’ for the men who think that a few ex tra pounds make us instantly undesirable.” Woman-hunting men need to set about get ting unbroke. (A shame you can’t earn a few bucks renting out space on that gigantic chip on your shoulder.) It might be hard to find a job, but it beats trying to find a single, gorgeous, well-adjusted babe to climb into the back seat and make out with you — especially when there’s a wino on either side of you and the back seat’s bolted into some form of public transpor tation.
My husband and I are best friends with a fantastic sex life. We often role-play. One weekend, I was dressed in a Catholic schoolgirl skirt, and my husband was dressed as the teacher. My parents have a key, and we didn’t hear them come in. Since this incident they’ve been trying to get us to seek psychological help. Is what we’re doing in any way unhealthy? —Costume Crisis You’ll never get in to see a therapist. They’re far too busy saving the marriages of miserable people who never have sex to save those of wacky, happy people with “fantastic” sex lives. If you’d like to do something meaningful for your marriage, iron the pleats in your skir t. Your parents are the ones who really need help — for being so lacking in imagination that it didn’t occur to them to knock. The fact that they’re so shocked is a sign — it’s probably high time somebody in their house star ted dressing up like a mean nun. Should you and “Teach” ever feel something’s missing from your marriage, you might explore how a lot of the “healthy” couples do it: Just dress up in crisp Gap casuals and sit side-by-side in a therapist’s of fice, silently resenting each other. (Now, that’s kinky.) — © 2003, Amy Alkon
Got A Problem? Write Amy Alkon
171 Pier Ave., Box 280 • Santa Monica, CA 90405 or e-mail AdviceAmy@aol.com