relationships
Advice Goddess Mystery Meet
A man my friend was crazy for just broke up with her. I kind of saw the breakup coming, as I thought they were too different, but she thinks he just falsely advertised who he really is. They met online, and he made himself out to be this guy who loves art and culture, which to her means going to museums, shows, and lectures and to him means staying home and making things. She now insists that the only way to meet people is in the amy alkon activity you want them to be doing. For example, if you want a guy who likes art museums and going to cultural events (which she does), you’d better hang out in an art museum to find a date. I think it’s a mistake for her not to keep online dating, because I think she’ll meet a lot more men. —Friend Of Stubborn Woman People try to put their best foot forward on dating sites, and rather often, it turns out it’s not actually their foot. Of course, deceptive self-marketing is not exclusive to online dating, and online dating does offer certain efficiencies that trying to meet a man at an art museum or cultural event does not. For example, people join a dating site specifically because they are looking for a partner. Some man you spot in a museum may also be looking for a partner — his wife, who was right behind him just a room ago. It sounds like your friend is blaming the Internet because a guy she liked didn’t like her back. They maybe both projected what they wanted on each other and needed to dig deeper to find out who the person they were dating really was. This is what dating is for. It’s supposed to be a process of finding out about a person, not “I baited the hook; I caught the fish; now let’s decide what’s for dinner at the wedding!” We often don’t need anybody to go to the trouble of deceiving us. We do that really well on our own, like by telling ourselves we’ve found the “perfect person” and ignoring any evidence to the contrary. Instead, there needs to be a vetting process, whether you meet a man online or at an artwalk. It involves asking questions and looking to see who he is and being willing to find out that he isn’t right for you. This vetting is essential because, wherever you meet men, there’s one thing many will have in common: insisting they’re interested in whatever you are if they think you’re hot. Try to help your friend see that holing up in the art museum isn’t the answer. Sure, it might be kismet that Mr. Dreamypants is standing in the lobby right next to her favorite sculpture, or he might just be waiting to enjoy the work of Sir John Harrington, the guy who invented the flush toilet found in the free public bathroom.
A Mitey Love
I’m 5’8”; my fiance is just at 5’7”. I’m only comfortable when he wears lifts, especially if I’m wearing heels. It may not seem like a big height difference, but when he doesn’t wear them, he feels like my son. I know they’re uncomfortable, and he sometimes doesn’t feel up to wearing them. Mostly, though, he won’t let me see him without them, because he knows I’m way more attracted to him when he’s a tad taller. I feel bad about this, and I’ve prayed that one day, my strong love for him will let me ignore this minor “flaw.” —Trying To Get Above It The dream was tall, dark, and handsome. Not elfish, dark, and handsome. Still, the problem here could be seen another way: You need to be shorter. Unfortunately, accomplishing that is the less practical solution, as it would require a saw. It might help to understand that you want him to be taller not because you’re a bad person but because you’re a product of human evolution. In our ancestral past, height in a man likely had mating and survival advantages. (The short caveman would have been less able to reach the lion with his spear: “Take that, you big meanie!”) As for what to do in the present, elevator shoes might be the solution you’re both looking for. While lifts are inserts stuck into the shoe, mainly raising the heel, elevator shoes, which can be custom-made by a podiatrist, have a hidden platform built in throughout the shoe. The latest models are cleverly designed and appear to be normal footwear. This means that a man needn’t suffer the discomfort of tromping around in heels just to be attractive to his partner. (Next thing you know, he’ll be complaining about the scratchy red lace and underwire digging into his flesh.) n ©2013, Amy Alkon, all rights reserved. • Got a problem? Write Amy Alkon, 171 Pier Ave, #280, Santa Monica, CA 90405 or email AdviceAmy@aol.com (www.advicegoddess.com)
48 INLANDER JULY 25, 2013
events | calendar
Community
SpokeFest Volunteers Volunteers needed to help set up the course and fair, provide direction, host food/ water stops and more for the annual community cycling festival (Sept. 8) in downtown Spokane. spokefest.org (anamatt24@gmail.com) A Night in Persia Themed dinner hosted by Solace for the Children featuring Persian and American dishes, auctions and a performance by the children staying here for medical treatment. July 25 at 5:30 pm. $50. Best Western CdA Inn, 506 W. Appleway Blvd., CdA. solacenispo.com/ nightinpersia (208-660-8088) Lions Club Train Rides Scenic rides. July 27 at 1 pm and 3 pm, July 28 at 11 am and 1 pm. $10-$15. Ione Train Station, Ione, Wash. (877-525-5226) Swim and a Movie Open swimming, concessions and screening of “WreckIt Ralph” at the pool. July 27 at 6 pm, movie at dusk. $2-$4. Northside and Southside Aquatic Centers, Spokane. spokanecounty.org (477-4730) Family Park Day Family festival day at the park featuring slip ‘n’ slides, bouncy house, carnival games and a movie at dusk. July 27 at 2 pm. Free. Sunset Park, S. King St., Airway Heights. cahw.org Beach Dance Party Potluck dinner, dancing and free dancing lessons. July 27 from 6-9:30 pm. Free; potluck dishes requested. Sandpoint City Beach. usadancesandpoint.org Parking Under the Pines Car and motorcycle show featuring live music, beer garden, vendors, kids activities and more. July 27 from 9 am-4 pm. Free. Southside Senior & Community Center, 3151 E. 27th Ave. (535-0803) Spokane Valley Cycle Celebration Family bike ride as part of the city’s 10-year anniversary. July 28 from 8 am-noon. $10, includes T-shirt and refreshments. Centennial Trail, Mirabeau Meadows, 13500 Mirabeau Parkway. valleyfest.org (922-3299)
live music, food and more. July 28 from noon-5 pm. Free admission, car registration $15. Palisades Christian Academy, 1115 N. Government Way. summertimeshowshine.com (999-7888) Scratch Lab Programming and computer animation workshop using Scratch, for grades 4-6. July 29 and Aug. 26 at 2 pm. Free. Spokane Valley Library, 12004 E. Main Ave. scld.org (893-8400)
Festival
Concrete River Festival Community festival featuring live music, beer garden, car cruise, parade, kids activities and more. July 26-27, Fri 4-9 pm, Sat 10 am-10:30 pm. Free. Downtown Colfax. concreteriverfestival.com Down River Days Music, arts and crafts vendors, food and drink and more. July 26-28. Downtown Ione, Wash. downriverdays.org Gem Faire Gems, jewelry and bead show. July 26-28. Fri noon-6 pm, Sat 10 am-6 pm, Sun 10 am-5 pm. $7/all weekend. Spokane Fair and Expo Center, 404 N. Havana St. gemfaire.com (503-252-8300) Hot Neon Nights Car Cruise Car cruise through downtown Priest River. July 26. priestriverchamber.com (208448-2721) Julyamsh Powwow Dancing, music, food and drink, vendors more. July 26 at 7 pm, July 27 from 1-7 pm and July 28 at 1 pm. Greyhound Park and Event Center, 5100 Riverbend Ave., Post Falls. julyamsh.com (800-828-4880) Liberty Lake Days Community festival featuring a car show, street dance, carnival and more. July 26-27, Fri 6-9 pm, Sat 11 am-5 pm. Free. Pavillion Park, Liberty Lake. (755-6726) Northwest Renaissance Festival Reenactments, vendors, performances and more. July 27-28 from 11 am-7 pm. $6-$35. 6493 Hwy. 291, Nine Mile Falls. nwrf.net (278-7728) Cherry Festival Cherry picking, arts and crafts, vendors and more. July 2728. Green Bluff Growers, Mead, Wash. greenbluffgrowers.com Glass on Grass Car Show Spokane Road to Sturgis Motorcyle ride rally Corvette Club classic and custom cars. featuring vendors, camping, food, July 27 from 11 am-4 pm. Riverfront games and more. July 25-27. Cruisers Park, 808 W. Spokane Falls Blvd. spoBar & Grill, 6105 W. Seltice Way, Post kanecorvetteclub.com (625-6601) Falls. (208-773-4706) Timberdays Family events, entertaiSemi-Final Talent Competition ment, car shows, lawn mower races Semi-final round of the Star Searchin’ and more. July 27. Downtown Priest Talent Seach competition. July 26 at River, Idaho. priestriverchamber.com 7 pm. $15-$20. The Center, 6425 N. (208-448-2721) Lidgerwood St. the5ifthelement.com Tri-County Settler’s Day ComRoman Nose Art Hike Hike to one of munity festival featuring a parade, three lakes as part of a one-day, plein food and drink, vendors, activities and air painting excursion with artists Nan more. July 27. Deer Park, Wash. DeerCooper and Carol Kovalchuk. July 27 parkchamber.com (276-2433) from 8 am-4 pm. $45. Meeting locaArt on the Green 45th annual arts tion and time TBA. (208-265-2787) and cultural festival featuring fine art Bare Buns Fun Run Annual clothvendors, local artisans, live music, ing optional 5K fun run/walk. July 28 food, kids activities and more. Aug. at 9:30 am. $18-$28. Kaniksu Ranch 2-4. Free admission. North Idaho ColFamily Nudist Park, 4295 N. Deer Lake lege, 1000 W. Garden Ave., CdA. ArRd., Loon Lake, Wash. kaniksufamily. tonthegreen.org com (327-6833) Spokane Valley Pond Tour Tour of private garden ponds, hosted by the Inland Empire Water Garden & Koi SoKids Summer Movie Series Movciety. July 28 from 9 am-4 pm. $5-$15. ies shown on Wed and Thu at 1 pm, Residences in Spokane Valley. iewgks. through Aug. 15. $3/show or $15/pass. com (863-4905) Kenworthy, 508 S. Main St., Moscow. kenworthy.org (208-882-4127) Show and Shine Hot rods, customs, classics and more on display featuring Frances Ha Comedy. July 25-27 at
Etc.
Film
7:30 pm. $6-$7. Panida Theater, 300 N. First St., Sandpoint. (208-263-9191) The Ground Truth Screening of the documentary on the struggles experienced by returning Iraq War veterans. July 25 from 6-8 pm. Free. Salem Lutheran, 1428 W. Broadway Ave. (3286527) Brave Outdoor movie screening. July 26 at 9 pm. Free. Mirabeau Meadows Park, 13500 Mirabeau Parkway, Spokane Valley. spokanevalley.org Hugo Outdoor movie screening. July 26 at dusk. Free. Half Moon Park, Holl Blvd. and Indiana Ave., Liberty Lake. pavillionpark.org (755-6726) Wreck-It Ralph Screening as part of the South Perry Summer Theater series. July 27 at dusk. Free. The Shop, 924 S. Perry St. (534-1647) Rise of the Guardians Outdoor movie screening as part of the Summer Moonlight Movie Series. July 27 at dusk. Free. Sunset Park, S. King St., Airway Heights. Cahw.org (244-4845) CdA Library Summer Movies Children’s movies (rated G or PG) shown on Mondays at 1 pm through July 29. Free. Coeur d’Alene Public Library, 702 E. Front Ave. (208-769-2315) Ghostbusters Outdoor movie screening featuring pre-show performances, food and more. July 31 at dusk. $5. Riverfront Park, Lilac Bowl, 507 N. Howard St. outdoormoviesatriverfront.com Selkirk International Film Fest Fourth annual film festival featuring short films from the U.S. and Canada with ties to the region. Aug. 1 at 7 pm. $5. Cutter Theatre, 302 Park St., Metaline Falls, Wash. (446-4108)
Food
Artisan Pizza Learn how to make crust and more in a hands-on class. July 25 at 5 pm. $45. Kitchen Engine, 621 W. Mallon Ave. (328-3335) Camp Cooking Basics Find out what equipment is needed to cook over a campfire and learn tips to make meals. July 25 from 7-8:30 pm. Free. REI, 1125 N. Monroe St. (328-9900) Beer Class “Lagers and Ales beyond Pilsners and Pales: Big, Bold, Bodacious Beers” beer education class on different styles of beers. July 25 from 6:30-8:30 pm. $15, reservations recommended. Total Wine & More, 9980 N. Newport Hwy. totalwine.com (4661644) Monroe Street Pub Crawl Annual pub crawl to bars along North Monroe Street, starting at The Sidebar & Grill. July 27 starting at 5 pm. $25. Ages 21+. Sidebar, 1011 W. Broadway Ave. monroestreetpubcrawl.com (521-0019) Nectar NW Road Show Wine-tasting road trip to the Red Mountain area of Central Washington. July 27 from 8:30 am-7 pm. $99. Departs from Nectar Tasting Room, 120 N. Stevens St. nectarnorthwestroadshow.eventbrite. com (981-8439) Eat to Live Workshop Six-week workshop on the benefits and how-tos of eating a plant-based diet including cooking demos, meal planning and more. Through Aug. 28, Wed from noon-1:30 or 5:30-7 pm. $10/class or $50/program. Center for Spiritual Living, 2825 E. 33rd Ave. (951-5557) Cupcakes Learn to use a frosting bag, tips, sparkling sugar and more with