Prop Thoughts
by
Duffy Perkins
Taking the Plunge
I
n the 1986 movie “The Money Pit,” a couple played by Tom Hanks and Shelley Long are conned into buying a mansion that immediately falls apart the second they attempt to move in. A bathtub drops through a rotted ceiling. A sweeping spiral staircase decomposes as Hanks ascends it. Long hangs a cute negligee in the closet only to see the closet bar and shelves all collapse under the weight of silk. Long ultimately leaves Hanks for her ex-boyfriend Max, a creepy European dude who is a music conductor and lives in a lavish apartment (she seems to have made her movie career off of bad decisions, no?). Hanks, dejected, asks her “What has Max got that I haven’t got?” and she answers, decidedly, “Walls.” I’ve been thinking of The Money Pit often, since we just bought our first home together. As soon as we did this, we started writing checks. Checks to the plumber, to the flooring guys, to the guys who cut down one wall and moved another. Checks to the Home Depot, to Ikea, to the K&B True Value on the corner of Bay Ridge and Forest Drive. I started calculating things by the measure of 1997 Nissan Maximas, which was until now our biggest purchase together. The floors cost two and a half Maximas. The bathroom makeover cost one and a half Maximas. The water filtration system cost one Maxima. The list went on and on. And of course, the first day that we moved in, one of our neighbors was kind enough to point out a few dead trees on our property that would need
16 April 2014 PropTalk
to be removed (for the price of three Maximas, all to be paid in cash only). At least she brought over cake; the flooring guys did not bring us any cake. As it turns out, we aren’t the only ones making big purchases right now. Recently the National Marine Manu-
facturers Association (NMMA) released a report stating that the recreational boating industry is continuing its postrecession gains, with an estimated five percent gain in new powerboat sales for 2013. 2014 is anticipated to follow the same suit, with five to seven percent gains across the board.
And then there are the younger folks (well, young-ish let’s say) like ourselves buying used boats out of yards (both boat- and back-), giving them some loving and getting them back out on the water. We’re dormant, but we shouldn’t be discounted. Our boats don’t cost $300,000, but they’re our starter boats and they’re our babies. We’re getting our families involved in a lifetime pursuit that will lead to more generations buying boats and getting out on the water. Ask any passionate boater why he or she keeps a boat, and you’ll generally be treated to a lengthy story stemming back to their happy childhood. No one ever answers, “Because now I can totally afford the gas.” Taking the plunge is always difficult at first, there’s no way to get around it. You jump in head first and are met with freezing cold water. But after a while, things get a little warmer. Treading water becomes a little easier. Home improvements become a little easier on the wallet, the sum of time on the water starts to be greater than the sum of time fixing up the boat. And then you understand the benefit. It’s a secret club that you only understand once you’re initiated, but once you’re there, you can’t even imagine living your life any other way. No more landlords, no longer a landlubber. So in 2014, find yourself in that five to seven percent, if you aren’t there already. Trust us at PropTalk: it’s a life worth living, and it’s a way better investment than multiple 1997 Nissan Maximas.
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