Andrew Lucchesi we’ve come as a culture; the practice makes me wish the breeders would just wear signs. Nellie Nellie is a less commonly used word that, as a noun, means an effeminate gay man; as an adjective (nelly) is used to describe the effeminate quality of a person. I mention nellie as an example of queer language that is leaving the lexicon. The language of queer culture changes quickly—as it does in all parts of culture. Though the RHHDAS traces nellie, an American variant of a French pet name (spelled the same), back to 1916,21 it has joined words like fairy, homo, swish, friend of Dorothy, and many others in working its way out of common use within the culture. Outing Here we come to a sensitive subject: how a queer person outs her or his self, and how a queer person can be outed by others. Outing is derived from the metaphor “coming out of the closet,” which is discussed above. One of the primary defense mechanisms for queer people, when they are in situations that seem unsafe or unfriendly, is to “straighten up” or to act “closeted.” This is a skill most queer people have to some degree; it is simply a reality of living life in a heterosexist culture—you learn to pass. There are times, however, when as a queer person you want to make it evident that you are queer. This is where outing comes in. One can either out one’s self by expressly saying that one is queer, or one can take more subtle means. “Dropping hairpins” or “dropping beads” are terms used to mean either intentionally or unintentionally (respectively) dropping hints about one’s sexuality.22 One can also be outed, which is when another person either intentionally or unintentionally reveals one’s sexuality. Not only is it a social faux pas to out someone without permission, it can be dangerous in the wrong company. There is power in being able to control who does and who does not know your sexual preference; the loss of that power can be very upsetting. Pride Gay Pride is used to mean one of two things: in one context it can mean the feeling of self-appreciation for one’s sexual or gender orientation and support for the orientations of others—in another it could be the parades and events meant to promote that feeling. The first Gay Pride parades were
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