Equal Magazine Jan 2013 by Delta Foundation of Pittsburgh

Jan 2013

BECOMING ALEX:

A TRANS STORY

OUT

ON THE FIELD: A HISTORY OF GAYS IN PROFESSIONAL SPORTS

WiNTER WONDERLAND SNOWY, SEXY FUN FOR YOUR JANUARY

PITTSBURGH’S

SLAM POETRY CULTURE

A PHOTO ESSAY

FROM THE QUEER LINKER (CHECK OUT PAGE 34)

GET HOTTER:

HOW TO MAKE and keep THE RIGHT FITNESS GOALS THIS YEAR

“FLAT-OUT ELECTRIFYING!” —Boston Globe

(Photos by Turner Rouse, Jr., John Daughtry, Litwin)

musical AY DW OA BR ng ki ea br nd ou the gr

TICKETS ON SALE NOW! FEBRUARY 19-24 • HEINZ HALL www.AmericanIdiotTheMusical.com

Box Office at Theater Square • TrustArts.org

412-392-4900 • Groups 10+ Tickets 412-471-6930

PNC Broadway Across America-Pittsburgh is a presentation of The Pittsburgh Cultural Trust, Pittsburgh Symphony and Broadway Across America.

HOLY FILTH Come worship John Waters as he brings his solo stand-up performance This Filthy World to Carnegie Music Hall. Presented in connection with Regarding Warhol, Sixty Artists, Fifty Years. February 1 at 8 pm at Carnegie Music Hall (Oakland). For tickets, visit Warhol.org

Calling all devout worshippers. Come mingle with an intimate group as John Waters gives a gallery talk relating to Regarding Warhol, Sixtys Artists, Fifty Years January 31 at 8:30 pm at the Warhol. For one of thirty tickets, visit Warhol.org.

The Andy Warhol Museum receives state arts funding support through a grant from the Pennsylvania Council on the Arts, a state agency funded by the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania; the National Endowment for the Arts, a federal agency and The Heinz Endowments. Further support is provided by the Allegheny Regional Asset District.

STAY BUSY

January 4

OBSCURE: A Night of Goth, Kink, and Performance Art

Cattivo pghobscure.bpt.me “Come out and revel in all things dark and on the edge, allow yourself...just for a night...to be freed of society’s expectations of you as you feel the kiss of the whip, or the glory of someone there to serve your every need.”

15 - 27

1 Elements of Humor Comedy Tour The Hillman Center 412.968.3000

HMH: HAIL TO THE CHIEF

Cattivo Cattivo.biz “In honor of Inauguration Day, Hot Metal Hardware brings you Hail to the Chief!”

SEX, DRAG, ANEDGLRCCOCK & ROLL A BENEFIT FOR TH Altar Bar Glccpgh.org

Les Miserables Benedum Center 412.456.2600

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“The lineup will include several local LGBTQ bands, including the smooth soulful sounds of Lyndsey Smith, Alternative rockers Audace Break and and some killer drag performances from local talented Drag Kings and Queens, including Maycum Dizzy, JJ Cox and Blade.”

GLCC Youth Drop In GLCC 412.456.2600 A safe place to hang out for ages 14-18.

Heinz Hall “What a feeling!” 866.389.9268

Impulse Pittsburgh Presents: I Survived the Apocalypse! CAVO Restaurant Lounge Nightclub Facebook.com/ impulsepittsburgh

Images Pittsburgh Facebook.com/imagespgh

LEZ

LIQUOR HOUR

Location TBD Lezdoitpgh.com

24- Feb 13

Transpitt Event Location TBD G2h2pittsburgh.com

Gay and Lesbian Community Center of Pittsburgh, Main conference room 412.456.2600

OUTRAGEOUS

“Members of the Trans community! Come out to see and be seen!”

BINGO

Rodef Shalom Congregation 412.621.6566

1776

Pittsburgh Public Theater 412.316.1600 ppt.org this Tony-winning Best Musical tells the story of how we went from 13 colonies to the United States of America.

25 - 27 World of Wheels Custom Car Show David L. Lawrence Convention Center 412.565.6000

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CONTRIBUTORS Jack Bellas is Partner of Revive Marketing Group and resides in Pittsburgh’s South Side. Jack’s love of the city is rooted in its culture, growing restaurant scene, and continuously evolving nightlife. John Britt, proud graduate of the University of Pittsburgh, his BA in Political Science and did his post graduate studies in Information Systems. Mt. Washington was home for 22 years, before moving back to his hometown, Jeannette, PA, to be closer to family. (A wise move, but my dearest friends are still in the ‘Burgh.) T.C. Brown has an M.F.A. in Acting from WVU and acts occasionally around the ‘burgh. His passion, besides spending time with his husband, Victor, is genealogy. Someday, he hopes to travel to Europe to visit the towns where his ancestors lived. Scott Creary is staff entomologist for Phipps Conservatory and Botanical Gardens, where his duties include educating the public about bugs, plants, and green living. He is also an ISA Certified Arborist with a B.S. in horticulture and an M.S. in entomology from Cornell University and the University of Maryland. Karla Doolittle is a mother, wife, writer, artist and advocate. Residing in Regent Square with husband Devon, a professional singer, artist, advocate. Her daughter, Anastasia, is an aspiring writer, photographer, advocate. Jessica Ezykowsky: Client Account Manager at CECity.com. I like to eat, drink, be somewhat merry and NAP A LOT. Kara Holsopple is a Pittsburgh-based freelance writer and radio producer. She’s a regular contributor to the regional environmental radio weekly, The Allegheny Front. Her work in print, includes features for the food and lifestyle focused TABLE Magazine. She loves good coffee, hanging out with her nieces and barking orders from the back of a canoe or kayak. 6

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Alicia Fennell wanted to be a writer since she was 8 years old. She has lived in 5 states in 10 years, she loves coffee, and her socks never match. Ignacio Filippini is a Bikram Yoga Instructor since 2010. He has a past life in design and marketing strategy. He’s thrilled to be part of Equal. Roy J Gloeckl II is an aspiring voice actor/children’s author with a BA in Creative Writing, Minor in Theatre and Certificate in Children’s Literature from Pitt. Said degree does not assist in the tending of bars, but he remains optimistic. In the meantime, our intrepid writer continues to seek a rabbit hole, down which he may tumble — or a Prince who will carry him off into the sunset. Kimberlee Jarrett is a proofreader and writer, who has been writing since she could hold a pencil. She is a Georgia Peach without the fuzz, hailing from the home of Gone With The Wind, although be assured she is more of a Rhett than a Scarlett. She is 34, lesbian, and monogamously single (when you hear her southern accent, you may want to be the one to change that). According to Winston Churchill, “The most beautiful voice in the world is that of an educated Southern woman.” Victoria Pinter is a recent graduate of Slippery Rock University. Victoria enjoys writing about politics, social justice, and public policy. Her work has appeared in the Des Moines Register, the Beaver County Times, and EQUAL Magazine. Mara Rago specializes in portraits, fine art, pets, events, model portfolios, legal, and corporate photography. She has a studio in the East End of Pittsburgh and shoots in studio as well as on location. Photography is Mara’s life. It’s a passion. Capturing visions in her little black box is a gift... and, every day, she is grateful.

Photographer Adam Milliron’s work has been seen in Elle Decor, Food & Wine, The Wall Street Journal, and on 30 magazine covers. Before he lived life through a lens, Adam was a creative director and a designer, specializing in branding and color therapy. He lives above his studio in Lawrenceville with his Vizsla, Jeek. Dr. Rebecca Smith takes care of sick little kids and gives out free medical advice from way down south in Hillsborough, North Carolina. Her favorite remedy is chicken soup for a cold (and she will give you the scientific explanation for it, as well!). Tiff Waskowicz is a Civil Rights Attorney. A large percentage of her practice is representing individuals in employment discrimination, retaliation, sexual discrimination, whistleblower, Family and Medical Leave Act, and sexual harassment cases. Tiff received her J.D. from the University of Pittsburgh School of Law in 2006 and a B.A. from Amherst College in 2000, where she emphasized her study in creative/persuasive writing. Tiff is a huge Pittsburgh Penguins fan, and, in her spare time, she enjoys cross word puzzles, reading, and jogging.

STAY WARM

THIS WINTER

STOP BY

AND CHECK OUT OUR NEW LOOK

965 Liberty Ave. Pittsburgh, PA 15222 (412) 391-9990 Open 2 PM to 2 AM 365 days a year!

WITH LOVE

Dear Friends, It’s a new year. As someone who is both romantically optimistic and incredibly determined, I’ve made some resolutions. And they’re good ones, too — unlike my 29-year resolution to stop biting my nails. I think (or hope) that crafting a solid resolution comes with experience and maturity. Last year, I resolved to run a race every month in 2012. I came in 10 for 12 (not bad, eh?). This year, I’m determined to run the Pittsburgh Marathon, something I’ve wanted for five years. I’ve also resolved to be a better wife, to plan fun date nights with Jenn and to fill up our year with lots of new rituals. I’m going to be a better friend (this means more pedicures for Shawn). And I swear I’m going to delegate more so that I have time to paint. We filled this issue to the brim with (what we think is) resolution inspiration. Jess Ezykowsky gives us three categories of new foods to try in our culinary column on page 19, and Ignacio Filippini talked to some cool trainers about ways to make our fitness goals last all year. Check out his story on page 40. If poetry is a passion, you’ll want to flip directly to Kara Holsopple’s feature on Pittsburgh’s insanely talented Slam Poetry troupes (page 36). Or, if you’re more of a sporty spice, you’ll want to brush up on your ethics in 2013 after reading Tiff Waskowicz’s story on page 14 (As always, she uncovered a lot and shocked us all). I hope that one of your resolutions, this year, is to get out in our gorgeous city. Abbey Wambolt pulled together an awesome winter guide, packed with things to do around the ‘Burgh — everything from ice skating to Pittsburgh Restaurant Week. Doggie-ear page 28. Finally, I want “The Queer Linker” to inspire you to attend more events this year (page 34), and I hope that you attend them out and proud — like John Kandray, our “out at work” feature guy on page 12. Advocate for something. Stand up, and stand out. Start something new. Be a leader. Organize something, and do it really well. We’re all on your side, and we’re rooting for you. You don’t have to make or keep your resolutions alone. I hired a trainer to get me to and through that marathon. Wouldn’t you know it — she’s also determined to get me to quit biting my nails.

Victoria Bradley-Morris Editor-in-Chief

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WHAT PAGE IS THAT ON?

JANUARY

FEATURES

Gays In Sports: So how do we fit into the world of sports? Here’s a hint - Twitter brings out the worst in athletes.

Poetry Slam: All over the city, poetry is experiencing a vibrant reawakening.

The Winter Guide: Let our winter guide help show you how to slosh, sled, ski, sip, skip and shop your way through January.

DEPARTMENTS 12 Working Out. An office outing with John Kandray 19 Food. The best places in the city to eat your seasonal blues away 24 Politics. In light of the General Petraeus sex scandal, it’s just business as usual 22 Arts. Pittsburgh based jazz vocalist Phat Man Dee dishes on the joys of being different 32 Event Photos. photos of being out on the town by G. Michael Beigay 34 Queer Linker. Get the dirt on Pittsburgh’s glittery gutter of drag and counterculture 40 Fitness. Why do extra crunches when there’s this recipe for a low calorie cocktail? 42 Legal. Maureen Cohon launches a legal service just for same-sex couples

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Ask the Doc

By Dr. Rebecca Smith The non-judgmental place that you can bounce your medical questions off an MD, without a copay!

Publisher:

Editor-in-Chief

The Delta Foundation of Pittsburgh

Victoria Bradley-Morris

Board Members “I feel fine… so why do I need to regularly see a doctor?!” First of all, I admit my bias. I’m a physician, so o f course I’m gonna tell you to make time for a check-up, right?! But there are some really good reasons that you should make sure that you see a primary care doctor at least once a year. 1. You are fabulous and worth it. You wouldn’t buy a Ferrari and not take it to get the oil changed, now would you? Your health is what allows you to love and live your life to the fullest. Regular check-ups screen for breast and testicular cancer, heart disease, high blood pressure, anemia, and sexually transmitted infections. All of these things could potentially make your life far less fabulous and, most, when caught early, are very treatable. Schedule an appointment. Make it for your birthday (or your half birthday). 2. Doctors are not as scary as they used to be. The old white-haired guy who lacks sensitivity training is quickly becoming a thing of the past. Young doctors are being trained 10

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to treat YOU and ME. Training especially aimed at folks who are gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered is becoming part of the curriculum at medical schools across the country. There are online sites that can give you suggestions for gay or gay-friendly physicians (glma.org or glccpgh.org). 3. Paying for basic medical care is getting easier and easier. Even if you don’t have insurance, many local family practice offices, community health centers, or Planned Parenthood offices have a sliding scale payment for a simple check-up. And, getting insurance is becoming more affordable by way of The Affordable Care Act (www. healthcare.gov). With this new law, more and more employers will be offering options for insurance, and state-based insurance plans have already started to become available to low-income and chronically ill individuals. Got a question? Email doc@ equalmagazine.com (Your questions will remain anonymous and no topic is off limits.)

Gary A. Van Horn Jr. President Steven R. Herforth Vice President Brian J. Stankavich Secretary Peter J. Karlovich Treasurer Samuel C. Badger Michael G. Bartley Daniel M. Catanzaro James R. Sheppard Louise F. Stutler

Emeritus Board Members Charles W. Honse William R. Kaelin Donnie R. Thinnes Charles P. Tierney

Art Director Jonathan Fobear

Advertising Director Chris Bryan

Emotional Support My gay husband Jenn Shawn Mark Coffee & wine Vodka Edward Marc Chocolates (so good) For questions, comments, and advertising inquiries, please email info@ equalmagazine.com EQUAL Magazine, PO Box 100057. Pittsburgh, PA 15233.

The mission of the Delta Foundation of Pittsburgh is to increase awareness and understanding of and improve the quality of life for the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender community in the Pittsburgh region. Opinions and claims made by advertisers are those of the advertisers ONLY. Equal accepts no liability for claims made by advertisers. All rights reserved. ©2012-2013 Delta Foundation of Pittsburgh.

January Events fri.4

First Fridays with Kierra Darshell

fri.11

ABC Night

Create an outfit wearing Anything But Clothes and the most creative wins a $50 bar tab!

Super sexy DJ Scotty Thomson comes to Cruze Bar on Saturday, January 12th!

Every Week

sat.12

DJ Scotty Thomson, 9 PM

Resident DJ at XL, Limelight, Avalon and Spirit in NYC

College Thursdays 18 to party, 21 to drink

Fabulous Fridays

fri.18

$2 drinks & bottles from 8-10 PM $4 Bacardi drinks ‘til midnight

Leg warmers & Members Only jackets optional!

$2 drinks & bottles from 8-10 PM $5 Absolut cocktails ‘til midnight

80s Night

fri.25

Sexy Saturdays Sunday Funday

Magaga Night

Your favorite divas and songs all night long!

Like us on Facebook

Happy Hour from 6-10 PM $4 Long Island Iced Teas ‘til midnight

1600 Smallman Street • 412.471.1400 • cruzebar.com • Open Tue-Sun 4PM-2AM

WORKING OUT

Beyond Borders

John Kandray leads by example at Ernst & Young

By: Karla Doolittle John Kandray is an openly gay employee at Ernst & Young, one of the world’s leading professional services organizations. He started with E&Y 10 years ago on the help desk and was promoted to project manager, a position he has held for the past 8 years. Because of the welcoming warmth at Ernst & Young, John has been able to be out during his entire career. As he puts it, “I have found that being comfortable with myself allows me to handle the situation with confidence, which puts other people at ease, and it gives them an opportunity to react or not, ask questions, or just carry on with the business at hand. Coming out to co-workers, for me, isn’t a big production, but rather, it usually takes the form of an honest answer to a simple question. If someone asks how I spent my weekend, I 12

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can reply that my partner and I went here or there.” John has also recently become co-chair of the ‘Beyond’ Pittsburgh program for his company. ‘Beyond’ community activities include educating college students about LGBT inclusiveness, sponsoring Gay Game Sports in Chicago, and hosting AIDS walks, PRIDE events, and more. Through John’s involvement with ‘Beyond,’ he has presented at the Out & Equal workplace summit in Baltimore. “This experience has changed my life, and the direction I want to take my career. At O&E, I realized how important it is to not only come out but to BE out,” John says. As busy as John is with his career at E&Y, his personal life is equally as busy. He is on the boards of the Gay and Lesbian

“Coming out to co-workers, for me, isn’t a big production, but rather, it usually takes the form of an honest answer to a simple question.”

Community Center of Pittsburgh (GLCC) as well PERSAD. He started to get involved a few years back when the news media was covering stories of young people committing suicide because they were unable to cope with bullying. “It’s through my community involvement that I realized the importance of being out and visible.” He currently resides in Regent Square with his partner of 10 years, Bill, who is a nurse/case manager with Forbes Regional Hospital. The couple has two poodle mixes, both of whom were rescued, and and they take them on daily hikes through Frick Park. They have a pop-up camper and enjoy camping with their dogs on summer weekends.

EAT THIS

B*tches Ball 2nd Annual

H EL

P US C ELEBRaT

LD E Wo R

ay D y SPa

Tuesday, February 26, 2013 6 - 10 pm (doors open at 5:30 pm) Tickets $20 ($25 at the door) includes: • Drink Specials • Appetizers • Raffles and Giveaways Order tickets online at www.animalrescue.org/b-ball-tickets Proceeds benefit:

412-345-7300 www.animalrescue.org

*While supplies last.

Cruze Bar 1600 Smallman Street

FREE Paw-tini in Light Up Glass Steel City Comedy Tour featuring Mike Wysocki

(WDVE) and Drag Chuck Krieger Competition Crowning Miss B*tchburgh 2013

FEATURE

Out of the Closet and Into the Shower How Gays are Treated in Professional Sports By Tiff Waskowicz During college, I was known first for being gay, and second for being a member of the field hockey team, whether I liked it or not. I loved playing a team sport — the camaraderie, the collective sense of accomplishment after running suicides, the spaghetti team dinners, the coach’s pre- game “inspirational” locker room speech that never failed to pump me up, the mix tape’s songs reverberating out of the boom box during warm-ups, the eerie yet perfectly silent seconds before the game’s first whistle, the comfort of sitting with teammates in quiet reflection after a loss; or, conversely, the exuberant pile-up of sweaty bodies after a teammate scored the game-winning overtime goal. It was all so intense. I loved everything about participating in team sports. Well, almost everything. There was only one problem: the shower. Let’s face it: Nobody wants to be “the gay” in the shower. During those angst-provoking showers, I feared my presence in and of itself would cause a teammate to feel uncomfortable, or that one of my teammates would think I was trying to sneak a peek. Thus, while in the shower, I followed certain rules: (1) choose a shower on the periphery; (2) avoid conversation; (3) utilize a two-in-one shampoo and conditioner to expedite the process; (4) face the wall; (5) if facing the 14

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wall is unfeasible, then eyes either straight ahead or fixed to the floor; (6) never reference anything gay, including, but not limited to, Ellen DeGeneres, who was huge at the time; (7) position your towel as close to the shower as possible to minimize your naked time; (8) never retrieve a dropped item; (9) avoid looking creepy; i.e. never be the last one in the shower; (10) never, and I mean never, sneak a non-sexual, comparison peek (a peek to see how your body looks in relation to others). Maybe, I was paranoid. Indeed, when speaking with former, heterosexual teammates, the overwhelming consensus was that showering with a gay girl was no big deal, and/or they also experienced discomfort because being naked around others is unnerving regardless of sexual orientation. Or perhaps, the “gay boy” in the shower is perceived as “more threatening” than the “gay girl” in the shower, because there is no denying that the shower and/or the locker room plays a definitive role in why so few athletes, particularly active, professional athletes have come out. It does not help that current and former professional athletes use the shower or the locker room in general as a reason to keep gays closeted. In 1997, former NBA star Tim Hardaway said he would not welcome a gay teammate. More specifically, he stated:

THE SHOWER DEBATE ASIDE, ATHLETES FEAR RETALIATION FROM OPPOSING TEAMS AND FANS, LOSE ENDORSEMENTS, AND EXPERIENCE DISPARATE TREATMENT FROM COACHES, TEAMMATES, AND REFEREES. “First of all, I wouldn’t want him on my team. Second of all, if he was on my team, you know, I would really distance myself from him because, uh, I don’t think it is right. I don’t think that he should be in the locker room while we are in the locker room.” Mr. Hardaway is not alone. In 2002, Jeremy Shockey, who at the time was a decorated tight end with the New York Giants, stated he would not want a gay teammate, in part because he would not want to shower with him. These concerns or fears imply that gay people are attracted to everyone of the same sex, have no impulse control, are incapable of acting like professionals, and/or (what I suspect is more subconscious) that “gay” is somehow contagious. More recently, NBA mega-superstar LeBron James reconfigured the “gay” in the shower/locker room debate as an issue of trust. Mr. James stated:

“With teammates, you have to be trustworthy. And if you’re gay and you’re not admitting that you are, then you are not trustworthy. So that’s like the No. 1 thing as teammates: We all trust each other. You’ve heard of the in-room, locker room. What happens in the locker room stays in there. It’s a trust factor.”

disparate treatment from coaches, teammates, and referees.

I have mixed feelings about his statement. Although I appreciate its departure from the “I don’t want to shower with a gay teammate” sentiment, it is not exactly a ringing endorsement of support for gay athletes who do come out. So, it is not surprising that the insidious “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” philosophy still governs sports. What will it take to shift way from this philosophy?

Finally, there needs to be accountability. As early as little league and in all leagues thereafter, including professional leagues, there can be no tolerance for such slurs as “fag,” “dyke,” and/or gender stereotypebased insults such as telling a boy/man that “he throws like a girl” — which is my least favorite sports insult (but I’ll save that for another article).

Visibility. Gay athletes, in particular, current professional athletes need to come out. I recognize this is easier said than done. The shower debate aside, gay athletes fear retaliation from opposing teams and fans, lose endorsements, and experience

Support from high-profile athletes would help. Can you imagine if LeBron James publicly announced his unequivocal support for playing with a gay teammate? Talk about a game changer.

With visibility, support, and accountability, hopefully more gay athletes will be coming out of closets and walking into communal showers without fear, without incident, and without following any silly rules.

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GAYS IN SPORTS

NOTABLE

EVENTS

In 1975, former NFL football player, running back David Kopay came out. In 1977, Kopay co-wrote, The David Kopay Story: An Extraordinary Self-Revelation, which has inspired many gay athletes, including Billie Jean King. Incredibly, since Kopay came out, no mainstream, active professional athlete from the NHL, NBA, NFL, or MLB has come out. In 1981, one of the all-time greatest tennis players, Martina Navratilova, came out at the age of 18. Notably, as stated by Donna Loppiano, executive director of the Women’s Sports Foundation, “Martina was the first legitimate superstar who literally came out while she was a superstar. She exploded the barrier by putting it on the table. She basically said, ‘This part of my life doesn’t have anything to do with me as a tennis player. Judge me who I am.’” In 1977, female transgendered tennis player Renee Richards won the right to play in the Women’s U.S. Open In 1981, tennis icon Billie Jean King was publicly outed. Billie Jean King currently advocates for ending homophobia in sports. In 1988, MLB Umpire Dave Pallone was fired by the MLB because he was gay. Thereafter, Pallone wrote a book entitled, Behind the Mask: My Double Life in Baseball, in which he stated he could field an All-Star team with all of the closeted gays in the MLB. In 1992, former NFL football player Roy Simmons came out on the Phil Donohue Show.

In 1993, former MLB baseball player, outfielder Glenn Burke came out. While still playing, fans in the outfield would taunt him and call him, “fag.” (On a separate note, some people credit him with creating the “high-five.”) In 1994, Olympic diver Greg Louganis officially came out. Louganis competed in the 1988 Olympic Games and won gold, despite testing positive for HIV weeks prior to the Games. In 1998, Justin Fashanu, an openly gay soccer player, committed suicide. After he came out in 1990, at the height of his career, no soccer club offered him a contract, and when he did compete, he often was the target of abuse from fans. In 1999, Atlanta Braves relief pitcher John Rocker, in response to a question regarding how he would feel about playing for a New York team, stated, “I would retire first. Imagine having to take the 7 train to the ballpark, looking like you’re [riding through] Beirut, next to some kid with purple hair, next to some queer with AIDS...” In 1999, female tennis player Amelie Mauresmo came out. Thereafter, fellow tennis players Lindsay Davenport and Martina Hingis made controversial comments regarding Mauresmo. After playing Mauresmo, Davenport stated, “A couple of times, I thought I was playing a guy out there: The girl is hitting so hard, so strong.” Davenport claimed her comments were innocent and sent a heartfelt apology to Mauresmo. Hingis insultingly said of Mauresmo that she was “half-man” because she had a “girlfriend.” In 1999, former MLB player Billy Bean came out.

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“I DON’T AGREE WITH BEING GAY OR LESBIAN AT ALL, BUT SAYING ‘FAGGOT’ DOESN’T MAKE ME A HOMOPHOBE. IT’S JUST A WORD.” -TANK CARTER, CLEVELAND BROWNS In 2000, The New York Times and a New England based newspaper, Bay Windows, printed an encouraging story about Corey Johnson, a high school football player who came out to his team, and his team fully supported him. In 2002, former NFL football player Esera Tualo came out and recounted the nasty, anti-gay comments he heard in various locker-rooms including, “faggot,” “queer,” and “fudge-packer.” Former Green Bay Packers football player Sterling Sharpe stated that had Tualo come out while still active then “he would have been eaten alive, and he would have been hated for it. Had he come out on a Monday, with Wednesday, Thursday, Friday practice, he’d have never gotten to the other team.” In 2002, then New York Giants tight end Jeremy Shockey stated he would not want a gay teammate because he did not how “it would work” to have a gay teammate in the shower. Shockey has since stated he regretted making this comment. In 2003, Shockey allegedly called then Dallas Cowboys coach Bill Parcells a “homo.” In 2007, former NBA player John Amechi came out. The reaction among active NBA players was mixed. NBA player Grant Hill who was with the Orlando Magic at the time, applauded Amechi’s decision to come out. A Philadelphia Sixers forward, Shavlik Randolph, stated, “As long as you don’t bring your gayness on me I’m fine, but I think it would create a little awkwardness in the locker room.”

In 2007, Penn State finally fired women’s basketball coach Rene Portland, who during her 27 years as coach of Penn State had a rule: No Lesbians Allowed. If Ms. Portland “discovered” she had a lesbian on her team, she effectively ended that player’s college career and/ or future in sports, whether in coaching, playing in the Olympics, etc. The controversy surrounding Ms. Portland is chronicled in one the sports documentary Training Rules. In 2007, Toronto Maple Leaf coach Brain Burke’s son, Brendan Burke, who had hoped to have a career in the NHL, came out at the age of 19 to his father. In response, Brian Burke fully supported his son and attended Toronto’s gay pride with him. The article “We love you, this won’t change a thing,” by John Buccigross, powerfully and beautifully chronicles Brendan Burke coming out to his father. Tragically, Brendan Burke died in a car accident in 2010. In 2010, the Stanley Cup was featured at Chicago’s Pride parade. Defense man Brent Sopel rode on a float in honor of Brendan Burke. Said Sopel, “When Brendan came out, Brian (his dad) stood by him, and his whole family stood by him, like every family should. We teach our kids about accepting everybody. Tolerate everybody; understand where everyone is coming from.” In 2011, the NBA fined Kobe Bryant $100,000 dollars for saying, “faggot,” sending a message that derogatory, anti-gay slurs would not be tolerated. To Bryant’s credit, he issued what would appear to be a sincere apology and recorded an anti-bully PSA.

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IN 2012, ATHLETES TOOK TO TWITTER TO EXPRESS THEIR THOUGHTS REGARDING HOMOSEXUALITY. HERE ARE JUST SOME OF THE ANTI-GAY TWEETS FROM THE 2012: Tank Carder (Cleveland Browns Linebacker). Tweet: “I don’t agree with being gay or lesbian at all, but saying faggot doesn’t make me a homophobe. It’s just a word.” Later: “I’m sorry if I offended you.” _______________________________ Brandon Spikes (New England Patriots Linebacker). Tweet: “I’m homophobic just like I’m arachnophobic. I have nothing against homosexuals or spiders, but I’d still scream if I found one in my bathtub.” Later: “PEOPLE!!! It’s just a joke...seriously a JOKE!!! Chill out.” _______________________________ Amar’e Stoudemire (New York Knicks). Tweet (to a fan): “F*ck you. I don’t have to do Anything, fag.” Later. “I’m sorry for what I said earlier. ...No Excuses. Won’t happen again.” _______________________________ Justin Fontaine (Minnesota Wild Prospect). Tweet (regarding the band, the Foo Fighters): “I disagree. The Foo Faggots were awful.” Later: The Wild suspended him for two games with minor league team.

In 2011, tough guy/agitator, NHL player Sean Avery came out in support of gay marriage, and in doing so stated, “I treat everyone the way I expect to be treated, and that applies to marriage: Committed couples should be able to marry the person they love. Join me in supporting marriage equality.” In 2011, NBA Phoenix Suns president and CEO Rick Welts came out with support of NBA commissioner David Stern, WNBA president, Val Ackerman, and (at the time) Suns guard Steve Nash. In 2012, Kevin McClatchy, owner of the Pittsburgh (woohoo) Pirates from 1996 to 2007, came out, stating the “frequent homophobic slurs” he heard in baseball circles had convinced him to keep his sexual orientation a secret. McClatchy hoped that his coming out would promote dialogue. In 2012, Megan Rapinoe, Olympic gold medal soccer player, officially came out. Thereafter, when questioned about gays in sports, Rapinoe stated, “I feel like sports, in general, are still homophobic in the sense that not a lot of people are out. ... In female sports, if you’re gay, most likely your team knows it pretty quickly. It’s very open and widely supported. For males, it’s not that way at all. It’s sad.” Rapinoe further stated that the response to her coming out had been positive. In 2012, Toronto Blue Jay’s baseball player, Yunel Escobar, was suspended three games for wearing a gay slur, written in Spanish, on the eye black tape that he was wearing for the game. In 2012, former football player Wade Davis came out. Davis stated he did not come out while still actively playing because he feared “the impact it would have in the locker room.” In 2012, Tennessee Titans quarterback Matt Hasselback talked with fellow Titans quarterbacks about whether they were aware of ever playing with an openly gay football player, and none of them were. Hasselback stated, “The question did come up, ‘Well, what about in the shower?’ And those are tricky, delicate issues. But so are female reporters in the locker room. There’s rarely a clear, black-and-white answer on a lot of tricky issues. But, I think, at least for the three quarterbacks in our room, it was kind of a shrug — yeah, so what.” In 2012, in response to the question of whether the locker room would be a more uncomfortable place if a teammate were gay, Minnesota Viking punter Chris Kluwe stated, “That assumes that the gay person in the locker room is going to find you attractive, which I think is pretty narcissistic...” In 2012, NFL players Chris Kluwe (Minnesota Vikings) and Brendan Ayanbadejo (Baltimore Ravens) publically supported gay marriage.

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EATING

NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS By Jessica Ezykowsky

BEST PLACES TO SHARE IN 2013: IBIZA, SOUTHSIDE. The menu is enormous, with a multitude of menu items for every palate. Order: • Kobe Carpaccio • Fresh green asparagus with smoked salmon • Spanish cheeses and cured prosciutto CASBAH, SHADYSIDE. Not just another pretty place. Order: • Grilled Bruschetta with date and apple butter, prosciutto chervil, Maytag blue cheese, and pecans • One woman Farm roasted beets pea tendrils, goat cheese, Anjou pear, roasted shallot vinaigrette, herbs, and walnuts • Orecchiette, grilled chicken, dried cranberries, Riverview Farms goat cheese, and sage cream

With 2013 upon us and New Year’s resolutions underway, I want to dedicate this article to helping everyone maintain their goals and ALSO eating them— err, meeting them. Let’s make 2013 the year to share with others, support others, and also experience what others have to offer when it comes to food. I should eat less but gluttony gets the better of me, so I like the small plate(s) approach or sharing food with my dinner partners. Most restaurants will split entrées if you ask nicely.

BEST PLACES TO EAT A LOT WITHOUT PAYING A LOT IN 2013:

BEST PLACES TO SHOP IF YOU WANT TO MAKE YOUR OWN FOOD IN 2013:

CASA RASTA, BEECHVIEW. New and Interesting Order: • Jamaican Jerk Chicken Burrito • Vegetarian Poblano Chilis and Potatoes Tostada • Shrimp Curry Tacos FRANKTUARY, DOWNTOWN. They donate 2 percent of their profits to charities. Order: • Pittsburgh – Hot dog with pierogies and cole slaw (It’s a ‘burgh thing) • Buffalo – Bleu cheese dressing and Frank’s buffalo sauce • Hyprocrite – veggie dog smothered in chili

MCGINNIS SISTER’S, MONROEVILLE, BRENTWOOD AND ADAMS TOWNSHIP. The original family-owned, farm fresh, local butcher, specialty market. They have everything from olive oil to specialty seafood items. DELALLO, JEANNETTE. It is totally worth the trip from Pittsburgh! First opened in 1954, this landmark in Pennsylvania revolutionized the olive and antipasti bar concept. Their fresh cheeses are cut to order, and homemade pasta and desserts are made fresh daily. PENNSYLVANIA MACARONI COMPANY, STRIP DISTRICT. The best days to hit this market are during the week, but if you can’t, get there EARLY on Saturday, like when the doors open. They have cheeses from more than 200 countries and they are always willing to give you a taste. The staff is uber friendly and always willing to go to great lengths to answer your questions or help you make a decision.

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GREEN

Hold the Water,

Sprinkle with Love Transform holiday houseplants into all-season beauties By Scott Creary By now, your holiday lights have likely been stored and your evergreens kicked to the curb. But what about those leftover potted plants? You know the ones — the last-minute gifts you received from gracious dinner guests, the lateseason bargain bin rescues from Home Depot. Rather than tossing them into the compost pile, here’s how you can keep them on your windowsill for months to come: Since most houseplants, including poinsettias, Christmas cacti, and cyclamen, are already tolerant of the dry air and low light levels found indoors during the winter, they can actually be quite easy to care for. Simply treat them like you would a new relationship: Give them attention, but don’t smother them. First off, if your pots have foil wrappers, you’ll want to remove them. Next, check to see if they have drainage holes. If not, you’ll want to repot the plants, and then keep them on the dry side throughout the cold season. When the top inch or so of soil becomes dry, water until you see liquid draining out of the bottom of the pots, and be sure to discard any that remains in the saucers. 20

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Alternatively, you can just give plants a quick soak in the sink. No matter the method, infrequent is best. Drowning and root rot associated with soil that is constantly wet are the leading causes of death among houseplants. Another point to consider is humidity. Cold air has a higher relative humidity than heated air pushed through vents, so you’ll want to keep your plants away from vents and drop your thermostat to 68 degrees. For more finicky plants, you may also want to invest in a humidifier. Or, try placing them on saucers covered with pebbles and fill with water to just below the top of the stones. As the water evaporates, humidity increases. Beyond these basics are the blooms. While certain plants, like Christmas cacti, will naturally set flower buds when the days shorten—giving their best show around Thanksgiving—others, like cyclamen, will bloom constantly if given enough light and kept in cooler temperatures. Poinsettias, however, are more of a challenge. They need to spend at least 12 hours in absolute darkness for about six weeks to induce bract coloration. For December blooms, begin treatment in October.

Follow these tips and your holiday houseplants can transform into all-season beauties. In fact, with just a sprinkle of love, you may just have the beginning of several beautiful friendships that last for years.

“SIMPLY TREAT THEM LIKE YOU WOULD A NEW RELATIONSHIP: GIVE THEM ATTENTION, BUT DON’T SMOTHER THEM.”

LOOKING FOR A FEW GOOD MEN? You’ll find 24 of them in this spectacular, star-spangled musical event!

book by Peter Stone music & lyrics by Sherman Edwards

directed by Ted Pappas

January 24 – February 24 • O’Reilly Theater CALL

412.316.1600

BUY ONLINE

PPT.ORG

PRESENTED BY

THE ARTS

Freak Show

Phat Man Dee is still Pittsburgh’s darling By TC Brown Drag queens. Belly dancers. Boa constrictors. Drummers. Flamenco dancers. Jazz songs. Circus acts. What do these things have in common? They could be part of a Phat Man Dee show. Mandee has gone from circus

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performer to cosmic jazz chanteuse; she has performed in a multitude of venues and events both locally and nationally, becoming one of Pittsburgh’s most colorful personalities. Growing up, Mandee always felt like an outsider, a freak, or a weirdo. She

emphasizes that this is a positive thing. She identified with people that were different from the norm and was inspired by some early jazz legends that might have been considered “freaks” of their time by mainstream society. These include Billy Strayhorn, who was an openly gay African American in the

GROWING UP, MANDEE ALWAYS FELT LIKE AN OUTSIDER, A FREAK, OR A WEIRDO. SHE EMPHASIZES THAT THIS IS A POSITIVE THING. ‘30s, and Bessie Smith, a bisexual African American woman in the early part of the 1900s, who toured with her own troupe. When Mandee was about 14, her mother moved the family to Pittsburgh. In high school, she participated in school musicals, either acting or playing cello in the orchestra. However, it was the all ages nights at Zack’s Fourth Avenue and the Rocky Horror Picture Show at King’s Court in Oakland, where she began to discover a whole new world of “freaks” with whom she could relate. In her early days of performing in Pittsburgh, she worked with a couple of local circuses, like Bull Seal! Collective, and Circus Apocalypse. For the circus, she would play cello, recite spoken word, and perform various circus routines, like her half man/half woman act. But she always had a desire to sing, especially jazz, and decided to leave the circus to pursue this passion. At first, she sang American jazz and French standards, before branching out in writing and performing some of her own songs; as well as songs by some local writers. Mandee is currently writing about ghosts. The imagery of her lyrics tends to be dark, and she finds it easiest to write when she’s upset about something: like the injustices in

the world. She detests racism, homophobia, and sexism; as well as ignorance and treating our world as a disposable place. She has written a poem about Trevor Martin, Jordan Miles, and Johnny Gammage and is looking to put a melody to it. Mandee has stayed in Pittsburgh for the one thing that she found so wonderful when she moved here: diversity. She values the mix of people who live in this city, as well as the many talented artists. But the local arts and music scene is another big reason she stayed here. “The [music scene] is amazing—people don’t realize what we have here,” she says. As she talks about local artists, you sense the pride and respect she has for their work. Although Mandee is a local performer, she does travel to other cities to work on projects. There are a number of memorable moments in her performing career. One was last summer when she had the pleasure of working with John Waters, creator of Hair Spray and all the Divine movies. This was for an episode of The Culinary Adventures of Baron Ambrosia. Ambrosia, a Pittsburgher, had his web-based show picked up by the Food Network. He asked Mandee if she wanted to do one of his episodes. She agreed, not knowing ahead of time that

Waters was going to be a guest star. In her own shows, Mandee believes that she “has found a way to artfully merge the odd, ridiculous, and bizarre.” She wants to create a podcast of a variety show that would be a “mix between Marian McPartland’s Piano Jazz and Hee Haw.” Mandee also mentioned that she would love to sing at a gay wedding. She is always on the edge of creating something new and daring. Sometimes bizarre, sometimes outrageous, Phat Man Dee is always entertaining. Talking to her, one can’t help to see how witty, sophisticated, intelligent, and caring she is, and how passionate she is for her work and art. Perhaps, she is just a freak ahead of her time. Phat Man Dee performs regularly at NOLA in Market Square and at the Shadow Lounge. Check her website for more information. phatmandee.com.

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POLITICS

Sex and Politics When Smart Men Act Stupidly By John R. Britt Why are people so surprised when men in power become involved in sex scandals? It seems to happen so often that we should be used to it. But the latest is one of the biggest surprises: It involved General David Petraeus, the highly regarded commander of the United States Forces in Afghanistan and the director of the CIA. General Petraeus was respected and admired by Republicans and Democrats. This is not an easy feat in Washington. His extramarital affair is a matter for General Petraeus and his wife, but his blatant disregard for security is alarming. Using a common internet e-mail account to convey explicit messages to Paula Broadwell? Shouldn’t the director of the CIA know that public e-mail accounts are not always secure? And he certainly should have been more discreet. He flaunted their affair by accompanying Ms. Broadwell to social functions in Washington. Surprisingly, this seems to be the pattern. There is a long history of this behavior, and most of us wonder how folks can be so careless. Ego? Probably. Sense of entitlement? Of course. The thrill of risky behavior? Maybe. And it is seldom that anyone tells the person in power that they are wrong. The history of men in power involved in some sort of sex scandal provides us with a long list. Some stories are rumor and speculation, but there are many that are well documented. 24

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Obviously, the top of the list for popular infidelity is former President Bill Clinton. It didn’t begin with Monica Lewinsky, but that Oval Office affair was nearly his downfall. Of course, he wasn’t the first or last. The details proved to be salacious and beyond the pale, but his actions may not be the most egregious. The list also includes congressmen, senators, governors and presidents. Former Senator Gary Hart was blatantly reckless. While running for President in 1987, he challenged the press to follow him to see if he was having an affair. They did, and he was. He was photographed with Donna Rice on a yacht named Monkey Business. Monkey Business, indeed. Former Speaker of the House Newt Gingrich gets the dubious distinction of a double mention. Twice divorced, three times married, the congressman had extramarital affairs while married to his first two wives. Amazingly, he saw nothing wrong with running as a “family values” candidate. Former Senator John Edwards, a former vice presidential candidate and a former candidate for the Democratic Presidential nomination may be the most disturbing of the bunch. While his wife was battling cancer, he was involved in an extramarital affair with a campaign worker, and they had a child together. Despite many denials, he ultimately admitted that the allegations were true. As if to prove that politicians don’t learn

from the mistakes of others, former Governor Eliot Spitzer of New York resigned after his own sex scandal. It was revealed and documented that the ex-governor had frequented the services of prostitutes. He resigned his office of governor, ending what many had thought was a promising political future. The sex scandal of James McGreevey is a bit different. In the early 2000s, it was revealed that the former governor of New Jersey, married at the time, was having an affair with another man. James McGreevey was in his 50s. For many men of that age, from that era, being openly gay was not much of an option. James McGreevey chose the path that he thought society had mapped out for him. He wanted a political future, and, at that time, marriage was required. Ultimately, he ended up with two failed marriages and the end of a political career. James McGreevey, of course, must be held responsible for his own decisions, ones that hurt his two wives, his family, and himself. But perhaps a person of compassion can understand how he reached those decisions.

THERE IS A LONG HISTORY OF THIS BEHAVIOR, AND MOST OF US WONDER HOW FOLKS CAN BE SO CARELESS. EGO? PROBABLY. SENSE OF ENTITLEMENT? OF COURSE. THE THRILL OF RISKY BEHAVIOR? MAYBE.

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ANIMAL PRINT

Pink or Blue Moon? When confronted with gender issues, cats still don’t care By Roy J Gloeckl II Picture it. Chicago. 2001. Silvano Gallego headed into the animal shelter on a bright springtime afternoon, intent on finding a new family member. Love came in the form of a four-month old silver tabby that he dubbed “Luna.” Being a responsible pet owner, Silvano made sure to have her spayed. When he returned to pick up his lovely lady, he was greeted with news of an unexpected sort. Luna been previously fixed, rendering her second procedure unnecessary. “Oh, and she’s a he! Do you still want him?” they asked. As Silvano put it, “Of course I do! This is a cat, not a t-shirt!” Silvano felt that Luna, meaning “moon,” was a beautiful name for a girl, but he wasn’t about to change it. The poor little (newly confirmed) guy had been through enough. The pair have lived in the Pittsburgh area for 10 years now, and when Luna isn’t chewing on shoe laces or knocking over knick-knacks for attention, he’s engaging in lively 26

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feline banter with his loving father. “He is just like a little person,” says Silvano. “When I leave for work, he is sitting in the window, watching me, and he’s there when I come home.” Luna’s incessant desire for attention may get on his owner’s nerves from time to time, but it did come in handy on one exhilarating occasion. Luna was being especially boisterous, pacing back and forth, crying out insistently for a moment of dad’s time. But this time it wasn’t about treats or shoe laces: He wanted Silvano to find out why the wall behind the electrical outlet was growing so hot. A wire had melted and caught fire inside the wall. In a moment worthy of that show-boating Lassie, Luna was able to use his whiney powers for good and avert disaster. Just one more reason this adoring dad is over the moon for his lively lad, Luna.

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FEATURE Worried about your holiday season in Pittsburgh without hockey? Don’t be. Here’s a winter to-do list sure to make this season full of adventure! Let’s indulge in the lush Tropical Forest India, while enjoying brunch at Phipps Conservatory and Botanical Gardens. Brunch admission is $24.95 for adults, $11.95 for kids ages 6-12 and free for children 5 and younger. Members receive 10% discount and Conservatory admission is included. To make a reservation or learn more, call (412) 651-5281.

20 Things to Heat Up Your January By Abbey Wamboldt Photographed by Adam Milliron

1 Spice up your taste buds at Pittsburgh’s Restaurant Week 2013! January 10 kicks off the food celebration, located at the Mini of Pittsburgh Dealership in Bloomfield from 6pm to 8pm. Indulge in samples from more than 50 Pittsburgh restaurants. Tickets are being sold online at PittsburghRestaurantWeek. com for a discounted half-off the $50 ticket value.

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3 What comes to mind when we hear muscles, leather, and lubricant? The World of Wheels Custom Car Show of course! ;) Returning for its 52nd year, join all the revved up women and men of Pittsburgh at the David L. Lawrence Convention Center. The show runs from January 25-27. Admission is $14 for adults, $5 for kids ages 6-12 and free for children 5 and younger. To learn more visit PittsburghCC.com.

Whiskey, whiskey, makes our girls get frisky? WE’RE IN! Come to the first whiskey tasting of 2013 at the Allegheny HYP Club. January 25, let’s warm ourselves with a multitude of different whiskeys that will surely take the bite from the bitter weather. Tickets are $40 in advance, $75 at the door. For more information call (412) 281-5858.

In August 2012, Washington-based retailer REI endorsed marriage equality as a way to build support for the upcoming ballot initiative that would prove to be victorious in November. We were so moved by this gesture that most of what our models in our winter guide are wearing is clothing and outerwear from REI. They are located in the SouthSide Works, and they’ve earned our undying support. REI.com

5 Nothing delights us more than a wintery romance. Seven Springs Mountain Resort is an ideal location. With rustic cottages available for us and up to 20 of our friends, we plan to spend our days skiing, snowboarding, and snowtubing, and spends our nights kissing in the hottub. To make a reservation call the Reservations department at (866) 473-1300 or visit 7Springs. com. Prices vary based on group number.

6 Intimate Friction is the 16th Mattress Factory Gestures exhibition. The upcoming installment brings together a diverse cross-section of talents. Past contributors have included tattoo artists and wig-makers. Don’t pass up this truly unique opportunity to experience some friction. Admission is $12 for adults, $10 for seniors, $9 for students (Pitt, CMU & Point Park are FREE with I.D!) and the exhibit runs through January 6.

7 Strap on our ice skates and let’s head down to Penguins Pond at Highmark Stadium, where the view of the city’s skyline is enough to knock us off our feet. Happening now through January 13, we can ice skate while viewing our beautiful city Monday through Thursday from 11am-5pm, Friday and Saturday from 3pm-11pm and Sunday from 3pm-7pm. It is $7 for adults, $5 for youth and $3 if need to rent skates. For more information call (412) 818-7310 or email pensoutdoor@magiciceusa.com.

Dance the night away with the L’s in the LGBT community at Impulse Pittsburgh’s: I Survived the Apocalypse party. It’s $5 at the door and the venue is CAVO Restaurant Lounge Nightclub. Drink specials for 21+. Find out more about this event and all of Impulse upcoming events at impulsepittsburgh.com.

9 Having some “cabin fever”? Let’s check out the Robert Morris Island Sports Center, which features ice skating, hockey, miniature golf and an indoor driving range. The center is open Sunday – Saturday from 6 am-11 pm. Prices vary based on activity. For more information check out rmu.edu.

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10 How about a day-cation to Laurel Ridge Cross-country Ski Center?! It is located on one of the highest mountain ridges in the Laurel Highlands region of South Western Pennsylvania. Cross-country center and trails are open daily Thursday-Monday from 9am-5pm. The trail fee is $8 for adults and $4 for 12 and under. Ski rental rates are $20 for adults and $10 for 12 and under. For more information call the Laurel Hill State Park Office at (814) 455-7725.

11 Now through January 6, experience the exquisite decorations and the breath-taking beauty of the Hartwood Acres Mansion. Weekday tours are from 10am-3pm and Sunday tours are from 12pm- 4pm. Admission ranges from adults at $6 to children at $1. For more information you can call the Mansion at (412)767-9200.

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What else can I do in the winter weather? Tie up my boots, throw on my Steelers hat and scarf, grab my sled and go sled-riding at one of the many awesome spots right here in the city! We can try Squirrel Hill Blue Slide Park in Frick Park (located off Beechwood Avenue), Oakland at Flagstaff Hill (across from Phipps Conservatory) or Shadyside Mellon Park (next to Phipps Garden Center).

Dancing counts as exercise, right? Why not burn some calories and work up a sweat when New York DJ Scotty Tompson comes to town on January 12 at Cruze Bar. For info, head to Cruzeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Facebook page or visit cruzebar.com.

16 To get an inside look at Pittsburgh’s drag community through an artist’s eyes, make sure to check out Jeremy Kost: Friends with Benefits installation at the Andy Warhol museum. This experience runs until January 27th. Admission is $20 for adults and $10 for students with valid ID. Find more information Warhol.com

17 Spend a weekend at the Morning Glory Inn in the South Side. The Victorian style rooms and homey feel give the Morning Glory an edge that can’t be beat. Sit bedside as our partners and we enjoy a breakfast in bed that is truly one of a kind. Rates vary for more information please visit gloryinn.com.

Come gaze at an interesting and fresh take on superhero Pop culture artwork at David LeBlanc’s New Action Evolution. The exhibit will be shown at the Toonseum art gallery downtown through January 6th from 10am-3pm. Admission price is $5, free for members.

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Belvederes in Lawrenceville is considered to be the ultra-dive bar; taking a step back in the 80’s every Thursday, serving up $1 PBR pounders from 10-midnight. Let’s not forget to bring our dancing shoes! Cover fee is $2 until after 10 where it becomes $4.

Cozy up to that special someone during a horse-drawn sleigh ride. Holly Hill Belgians takes groups (or couples) out on snowy rides, hot chocolate in tow (don’t forget your flask). For more information and pricing please call (814) 438-8112.

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Break out the suits and dresses; it’s time to get classy with Grand Night for Singing. This event is being held at the Cabaret Theater and will surely make our hearts melt. Broadway’s tribute to Rodgers and Hammerstein showcases the timeless music of Richard Rodgers and Oscar Hammerstein. This event is perfect for lovers of classical music. Tickets are available online at CLOCabaret.com, by calling (412) 456-6666 or at the Box Office at Theater Square.

Bernard Dog Run, Lawrenceville’s new dog park, is the perfect place to play fetch in the snow and meet some fellow animal lovers. Plus, it was named for our community’s Jay Bernard, a Lawrenceville resident, businessman and abandoned dog advocate. bernarddogrun.org.

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EVENTS

What’s Gay and Goin’ on? Photos and recap by G. Michael Beigay 1

Persad held a (chilly) 5K Run and Fun Walk at North Park (1) Gay 4 Good volunteers help set up for a fundraiser walk-a-thon to support St Jude Childrens’ Research Hospital at Robinson Mall. (2) Students from area colleges and universities joined Mayor Luke Ravenstahl for the (PITTSBURGH)RED/World AIDS Day Rally and Advocate Candlelight (3) Carnegie Music Hall was filled with guests to listen to the Renaissance City Choir’s holiday concert: “Warm by the Fire”. (4) Pittsburgh’s skyline was lit red for World AIDS Day on December 1 including the Highmark spire atop Fifth Avenue Place. (5)

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BE THE CHANGE

Becoming A Trans Story By Alicia Fennell When I first met Alex, he was Allison. We went to the same school, and my only thought whenever I would see him was, “She is just like me.” Being an open lesbian in a small town has more than its trials and tribulations. The constant mockery, the bullying, the coming home in tears was nothing new to me. But at the time, I had no idea what Alex was going through. I thought I had it bad, being called “you dyke” or “faggot” as I made my way to English class. Alex was refusing to use the girl’s bathroom and holding it in all day. He was bullied for the way he looked and the way he dressed from elementary school all the way through college. He was jeeringly asked frequently whether he was a girl or a boy, and was ridiculed more when he was found to be a girl. He hated himself. Alex identifies as Trans. Though I cannot relate, being that I was born a girl; I know I am a girl, and I love being a girl. The idea of not being comfortable in your own skin is a concept I cannot even begin to comprehend. Rewind to five-year-old Alex: He was obsessed with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles; he wanted to be one when he grew up. Somewhere in the back of his mind, while he was battling Shredder, he was also battling the fact that he was a boy, trapped in a girl’s body.

Now, let’s fast forward 12 years: 12 years of mockery, confusion, and not knowing what he was feeling. He liked girls…was he a lesbian? Was he just confused and gay? Throughout high school, he pretended to be a straight, manloving woman. This could push anyone over the edge. And then one evening, his life drastically changed. Alex was watching a show on TLC, and a trans man was talking about his transition. All of a sudden, Alex didn’t feel alone anymore. He could relate to wanting a top surgery, not shaving, and feeling like a boy. His ah-ha moment had happened. Alex is transgender. He started going to therapy, talking to his counselor, and after all of those years of struggling, bullying, name calling, a broken heart, Alex was becoming himself. Today, Alex is working on his masters degree in social work; he wants to work with other LGBTQ youth who are in his shoes. He wants to help them discover who they are so that maybe they won’t have to go through the turmoil he went through. He has been on “T,” or testosterone, for the past seven months. He calls it his miracle drug. Alex says that he has never felt this alive, never felt more like himself. Plus he looks really cute with his mustache.

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QUEER LINKER

The Queer Linker

Photos and recap by Caldwell Linker

by Caldwell Linker Vanessa German’s show at the Pittsburgh Center for the Arts was brilliant, moving, and thought-provoking. (1) And, Willam Belli made a stop in Pittsburgh to a packed and delighted crowd at Cattivo. Her performance was hilarious and energetic, but she had some stiff local competition with a surprise appearance by Sharon Needles. (2) For folks who wanted to get their dance on, Operation Sappho brought the house down, and guest DJ Designer Imposter was a huge hit. (3) The Shadow Lounge hosted the final installment of its yearly “My People” series, brought to you by the Kelly Strayhorn Theater. Joseph Hall moderated a very insightful dialogue about people of color and social media, featuring the folks from Queer and Brown in Steeltown and one of the creators of Drama Queenz, Dane Harrington Joseph. This program is put on every year and always brings really interesting perspective on LGBTQI people of color in the arts, both in Pittsburgh and the rest of the world. (4) I rounded out the month at the Warhol Museum’s annual Naughty or Nice party. Hosted by Sharon Needles and Eric Shiner, the evening was a blast. (5) And finally, a shameless plug for my art event at Artisan Tattoo Gallery and Café: I had a fabulous time, and there were incredible performances by Mahogany La Piranha, Cherri Baum, Heidi Glum (of DC), Amy Vodkahaus, Janet Granite, and Alaska Thunderfuck. (6) (Speaking of Alaska, you might have heard the announcement that she will be a contestant on Season 5 of RuPaul’s Drag Race. ConDRAGulations.)

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FEATURE

poetry OUT loud Voices from Pittsburghâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Slam and Spoken Word Scene By Kara Holsopple Photographed by Mara Rago

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Slam Poets Jude Waldo, Tera McIntosh, Adriana Ramirez, and Nina Barone, holding Anna Voelker

Slam Mamns By most accounts, the style of spoken word poetry known as “slam” was started by a working-class poet in a Chicago jazz club in the 1980s. So it’s fitting that our own city of industrial roots is home to a growing number of slam poets and spoken word artists, who are building on the tradition with local raw material. Poets like Tera McIntosh. She works with at-risk youth, just earned a Ph.D., specializing in asset based community development, and sits on boards of and is involved closely with a number of area non-profits. She’s a Pittsburgh Passion football offensive line player and a pallet furniture builder. McIntosh is also the executive director of the Pittsburgh Poetry Collective, an umbrella organization for youth poetry, Steel City Slam, writing workshops, and community performances. But she has another way to describe herself: “I would call myself more of a social justice poet. Most of my research for my doctorate was done in creating safe spaces for people to come together and build relationships.”

That includes creating safe space for herself. McIntosh came out as a lesbian publicly for the first time while performing her poem “Dear Tyler” in a slam. It was inspired by the bullying that drove Tyler Clemente to take his own life by jumping from a bridge. The last lines read:

And remember If I can stand here today, so can you. It gets better—it did for me… and it will for you.

McIntosh says the slam poetry world is so open and accepting, she’s never been afraid to express herself there. “We create better communities when we get to know each other,” she says. And that’s one of the reasons she’s such a big advocate for the Pittsburgh Poetry Collective’s youth program, Young Steel. The exhibition league performs the last Saturday of every month at Cannon Coffee in Brookline, McIntosh’s neighborhood. She says fostering a youth program encourages literacy, problem solving, and cultural learning and acceptance. It also makes for better future slam poets. The adult poets of Steel City Slam perform August through April, every third Tuesday of the month at the Shadow Lounge in East Liberty to an

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audience of students, art lovers, and other poets. But they also throw down their own brand of emotional, storytelling-style poetry in hospitals, schools, detention centers, and at literary events in three minute blocks of time, the standard for the genre. And it’s a competition. The 10 or so poets who perform in three rounds rack up points awarded by judges in the audience. Poets with the most points advance to regional and national slam competitions. Adriana E. Ramirez has been there. She’s the Slam Master of Steel City Slam — she runs the joint — and creative director of Pittsburgh Poetry Collective. The creative writing teacher at the University of Pittsburgh came from the Texas slam scene in 2006. She says the slam style in Houston is Southern Gospel. In Austin, it’s comedic. Here in Pittsburgh?

Slam N’at “We’re a lot quirkier,” she says. Ramirez says her Pittsburgh counterparts are characterized by their sincere voices and interesting work, which reflects the truth of their lives. The group isn’t ranked at the top of the national teams, but they have a lot of heart. On the way to the national competition last year, members performed guerilla slam at each restroom and gas station pit stop along the road. Ramirez says spoken word scenes evolve based on who shows up. In Pittsburgh it’s diverse, with not one dominant style. “We’ve transcended our traditional cliques,” she says. From straight edge punk to Hispanic female professor, to working class white man — “We kind of love each other with open arms.” And being different pays off. As a younger poet, Ramirez says, “I was looking to relate to everyone all the time.” Then she realized the more specific she got, the more universal the appeal. She found her voice. Her poem, “For the Cheaters” is a good example. It painfully details

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the agony and ecstasy in the lives of people who cheat on their romantic partners, from furtive text messages to lying that feels like honesty. Anyone who has cheated or been cheated on, of any race or gender or sexual orientation or class could see themselves in it.

On the way to the national competition last year, members performed guerilla slam at each restroom and gas station pit stop along the road. The Medium Is the Message You could see Ramirez perform it on YouTube, but that would be missing half the point. Because slam poetry is for the audience. They are participants, as much as the poets. Their likes and dislikes create the mood of the performance. Ramirez says that though slam is a safe space, there’s inherent judgment. But that immediate feedback — when you know that you are connecting, or not — is really satisfying. It’s a medium of highs and lows. Steel City Slam poet and undergrad in creative writing Jude Waldo says, “Slam poetry gets the entire body of the poet involved, and the rush that comes from that is absolutely amazing.” But not everyone is convinced. Slam poetry has had to compete with some pretty big misconceptions. Think scowling beat poets and other clichés, says Ramirez. She says many

assume the format and content are driven by identity politics. Instead, she says, “It’s an immediate and vibrant art form that allows for a lot of variation that people don’t expect.” Performer and poet Anna Voelker says she loves new audiences for that reason —“I get the honor of exposing them to a totally foreign form of art. Poetry that is spoken, whether on the stage or on a library floor, allows me to not only share what I love, but I get to watch other people learn that they love it, too.” It is inherently narcissistic, though — and Ramirez says that can be a downside because, “People don’t always think of other people’s lives as important.”

SPEAQ Up Increasingly the inner and outer lives of LGBTQ youth are being seen as more important — in the gay community and the wider world. The last Monday of each month at the Shadow Lounge, the SPEAQ series supports that reality. “Really, it’s to perform anything you want to share with people. It’s to give a voice. It’s really just about sharing something that you have to give,” says coordinator Luke Niebler. The program is a spinoff of Web Poets, an online poetry forum for queer youth and allies. And it’s the brainchild of Dreams of Hope performance troupe founder Susan Haugh and renowned artist Vanessa German. A series of workshops morphed into a relaxed, non-competitive open mic event. Slam, poems with guitar accompaniment, and hip hop have all had a turn at the mic. Niebler says the offerings may expand to videos or staged readings.

Poetry that is spoken, whether on the stage or on a library floor, allows me to not only share what I love, but I get to watch other people learn that they love it, too. It’s all driven by a Young Poets Advisory Board-currently four young women aged 17-25. They brought in hip hop artist Chiney Mayne as a guest artist. Poet Soham Patel will headline on January 28, one day after Dreams of Hope premiers it’s 10th anniversary season. And of course, about ten young performers will also go on. Niebler says for him and the other young performers, the pure terror leading up to that moment in the spotlight is strangely a draw. “Every single time the sign up list stays real empty until about halfway through the

performance, then people are slowly building up courage, they’re seeing other people put themselves out there.” Michelle Reed, a member of the Young Poets Advisory Board, is compelled to get up on other grounds. She says, “I perform because I like being on stage and to get recognition as a writer. You have to start somewhere.” But for her, excitement is still a big part of it--“Like when I hear a particular melody or voice in the music world that causes my adrenaline to rise...that’s the feeling I want people to have with the things that I say.”

Many slam and spoken word poets say their aim isn’t to be taken too seriously — it’s to entertain. Adriana E. Ramirez, who performs all over the country, says providing a voice, an outlet, is invaluable. She and her teammates would also like to grow Steel City Slam, get more support from the city, and nurture partnerships like the one they have with the Shadow Lounge and their new programs with the Union Project. But in the end they just want people to know, through experience or word-of-mouth or the Pittsburgh Literary, “We’re doing this rad thing, and it’s really fun,” she says. For more information, visit pghpoetry. org, dreamsofhope.org/speaq, webpoets. dreamsofhope.org or Calendar(sampsoniaway. org/pittsburghliterarycalendar/index.php

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FITNESS

You’re So Hot How to Set Fitness Goals You Can Actually Keep By Ignacio Filippini Every January, albeit temporary, health and fitness facilities around the country experience an onslaught of new members and an increase in attendance of existing members. Inevitably, attendance begins to taper off as the year progresses. So, what steps can we take to avoid this happening to us? Goal-setting is an art form. It’s been a topic of research and discussion in the business community for years. In 1981, George T. Doran introduced a mnemonic guide to help organizations create better goals: S.M.A.R.T., which stands for specific, measurable, attainable, realistic and timely. This framework can be easily applied to personal goal setting and New Year’s resolutions. Here’s a step-by-step guide: Make your goal specific. For example, “eating healthier” is a general goal, while “cutting out red meat from my diet for one month” is specific. Make sure your goal is measurable. For example, it is difficult to measure “eating healthier,” but caloric intake, ingredients, and portion size can be easily measured. Make sure that your goal is attainable. If money is tight, investing in a gym membership may not be right for you. Instead, run outside or tackle the stairs in your own home. Ensure that your goal is realistic. You will not be able to lose 80 pounds in one month, but if you spread that goal over the course of the year, you will have an easier time making it a reality.

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Choose an appropriate time frame for your goal. Set short-term goals that you can achieve and measure along the way, like losing 7 pounds a month for a year. By breaking it up, you make your goal more achievable and experience a sense of accomplishment along the way, which will motivate further change.

Quick Tips! Jennifer Hoffman, personal trainer, gives her best advice for better eating: I hate the term “diet.” Everyone thinks it’s a simple fix. “Which diet will make me lose weight?” is one on my top 10 most asked questions. Diets only lasts a short period of time. You’ll see results, but once you stop, you will go right back where you started. I recommend looking at your foods as fuel, and start swapping out foods you know you shouldn’t eat and replacing them with things you should. For example, if at midday you crave a candy bar, swap that for some raw veggies. Diets don’t produce lifelong results, lifestyle changes do. Start small. I tell my clients to find a “bad food” they consistently eat — just one — and try cutting that out first. Once you can cut one, it becomes easier to continually replace bad foods with healthier alternatives. You are now making your bad habits good habits.

Suzan Falvey, exercise specialist and private coach, gives us a drink recipe to toast to the New Year:

I don’t drink much, but when I do, I go for a Low-Cal Moscow Mule. This recipe for the 1941 classic cocktail is a light version. The key non-alcoholic ingredient, giving it that “mule-kick,” is Ginger Beer. I prefer using Reed’s Lite available at both Whole Foods and Market District. If you have access to a copper mug, use it! It keeps this libation frosty and crisp.

Ingredients: 1/4 cup vodka 1/2 cup Reed’s Lite 55 Calories Extra Ginger Brew 1 tablespoon fresh lime juice Ice cubes Lime wedge Direction: Pour first three ingredients over ice; stir slowly. Garnish with lime. Total Calories: 105

Laws of the Heart Maureen Cohon Launches Legal Counsel for Same-Sex Couples Across the Country By Megan McLachlan 42

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Today, she’s chair of a group that provides legal advice to domestic partners, but when she first moved to Pittsburgh 16 years ago, the plight of same-sex couples was relatively foreign to Baltimore lawyer Maureen Cohon. “There were so many issues involved about which I had no idea,” says Cohon, who moved to Pittsburgh for her own partner and husband, who is President of Carnegie Mellon University. Soon, with her practice of family law at Buchanan Ingersoll & Rooney, she encountered same-sex partnership issues firsthand. Couples would come to her with cases regarding real estate which was titled in only one partner’s name, thinking the other would get the property when the owner died. She explained to the partners that unless there was a legal document, i.e. a will stating that the property owner wanted his property to go to his partner, what he wanted to happen might not. Another issue was adoption where one partner adopted a child and the other parent was unable to do a second-parent adoption at that time in Pennsylvania. We needed to figure how to make sure that the nonadopting parent would be able to continue to care for the child, as a father, if something happened to his partner. These clients opened her eyes to the injustices same-sex couples encounter. Suddenly, Cohon had a realization. “I realized that we need to help these couples who are underrepresented,” said Cohon. “They need to know they need legal help.” With this incentive, and the blessing of Buchanan Ingersoll & Rooney, Cohon started the Nontraditional Couples and Families Group, a conglomeration of attorneys from across the country, from Philadelphia to California, that provides legal

“MY CLIENTS WERE AMAZED, AND DISMAYED, THAT THEY HAVE TO BE PROACTIVE IF THEY WANT THEIR PARTNERS TO BE PROTECTED,” SHE SAYS. counsel to same-sex and nontraditional couples. The group meets four to six times a year and discusses everything from DOMA (Defense of Marriage Act) and Proposition 8 to other legalities geared toward these relationships. “In 2001, when this practice group began, we asked any lawyer in our firm who was interested to become a member of the new group, and we received an enormous turnout at our first meeting and that interest has continued,” she says. She had some concern that a group like this one might alienate some of their clients and friends; Buchanan Ingersoll & Rooney discovered just the opposite. “No letters to the editor,” Cohon says. “We received a tremendous response from our clients and friends who began calling and wanting advice for their own children and

friends. Everyone is touched by this in one way or another.” Plus, the firm is in a league of its own. The services of the group include domestic partner and cohabitation agreements, change of name, estate planning, litigation, and immigration, just to name a few. But of the many nontraditional couple issues, the one Cohon encounters the most is making sure these families are protected in life and death, something that’s not always apparent. “My clients were amazed, and dismayed, that they have to be proactive if they want their partners to be protected,” she says. Cohon sees a growing tolerance from the general public but cites that it’s hard to measure acceptance when you’re an ally and not dealing with nontraditional issues on a personal level. However, compared to when Cohon first became a lawyer, she recognizes strides in conversation. “When I started, no one knew what DOMA was,” she says. Based on this last election, with big wins for the LGBT community in Maine and Maryland, Cohon sees it getting better and better for gay and lesbian couples in the future. “The time is right now. Younger people — there is no question in their minds that gay marriage is a good thing. No one wants to see one group treated lesser than another.” The LGBT community and allies can visit the group’s website, www. nontraditionalcouples.com, for legal information, news, and services related to gay and lesbian couples.

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ALL SEXUALS

Lesser Known

Sexualities A Higher Level of Inclusion

By Victoria Pinter We all know the names of the more mainstream sexualities — gay, lesbian, straight, bisexual. But there are a few other sexual orientations which aren’t as well known, let alone recognized, by the socalled “mainstream LGBTQ” community. For example, if you were to describe yourself as being pansexual or asexual, even in the context of the LGBTQ community, you would face reactions ranging from confusion to ignorance or bigotry. For the sake of increasing inclusion in the LGBTQ community, it is worth discussing and

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acknowledging these lesser known sexual orientations. In doing so, we strengthen our community and foster a greater sense of solidarity. Pansexuality is sometimes known as bisexuality, taken a step further. Where bisexuality inherently accepts the idea of gender binary, pansexuality does no such thing. Pansexuality inherently rejects the idea of an artificial, socially constructed gender binary. Those who are pansexual may be sexually attracted to those who identify as male, female, gender queer, or maybe even someone who doesn’t

identify with any gender identity. Because of the similarities between bisexuality and pansexuality, there is often a lot of confusion and even derision in the LGBTQ community toward those who identify as pansexual. Asexuality is also very divisive concept in the LGBTQ community. In fact, there is a lot of debate within the community about not only the definition of asexuality, but also whether or not it actually exists. The most commonly accepted definition of asexuality is a lack of sexual attraction, as well as a lack of interest in sex. Of course, there is a distinction to be made between asexuality and sexual

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abstinence or celibacy: With celibacy or abstinence, there is usually some amount of sexual attraction. With asexuality, this is not the case. It is important to separate sexual behavior (which can be motivated by many different factors) from sexual orientation (which is generally more stable and unchanging over time). There is a lot of heated discussion (both inside and outside of the LGBTQ community) about whether or not asexuality is a valid or â&#x20AC;&#x153;realâ&#x20AC;? sexual orientation.

Pansexuality and asexuality are certainly not the only sexual orientations whose validities are up for debate. However, they are two sexual orientations that are gaining more recognition both within and outside of the LGBTQ community. And a greater level of inclusion inside the community brings a stronger and more unified community.

CMY

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TRAVEL

Winter Fairyland Vail and Beaver Creek are the best getaways in the snow

By Jack Bellas “Get into the snow” is what I heard every year during ski season. Growing up in Pittsburgh, most of us remember that catchy phrase from the Seven Springs commercials. As a skier, this was my signal to get my skies waxed and to be ready to hit the slopes. Everyone always asked, “What is your favorite place to ski out west?” I, unfortunately, did not have an answer to that question, as I had only skied the handful of resorts around Pennsylvania — that is, until last winter when I went to Vail and Beaver Creek in Colorado. They are worth the trip; both have a personality all their own, and I challenge you not to fall in love.

Vail and Beaver Creek are roughly a two-hour drive from Denver. The drive is beautiful, but don’t let yourself get stuck on the few passes on your way up the mountain (or back down for that matter). On the almost complete uphill climb for the trek from Denver to Vail, I wondered if it was fog or the clouds that I was driving through. And once I arrived, the charm of this ski town left me wondering if someone had dropped me off at North Pole (and if I would run into Santa Clause around the next bend). The skiing is fabulous, but the key to this winter wonderland are the restaurants and bars that are scattered all over the mountain. Whether I was grabbing a quick snack before I headed back out to the slopes or going out for a meal, the foodie in me salivated. Beaver Creek is food central. At the base of the mountain, I couldn’t beat the Grill outside of

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the Ritz Carlton. Enjoying a beer and a burger while looking up at the slopes, all while in my ski boots, was like heaven. That is, until I took a sleigh up the mountain for an evening of decadent food and wine selections at Beano’s Cabin. This restaurant is situated near the top of the mountain, nestled in trees and snow-capped peaks, with a fireplace the size of some people’s homes directly in the center of the restaurant. It was fine dining in the middle of the most picturesque winter setting. Whether I’m looking to go skiing, snowboarding, or snowmobiling — or just yearning for a spiked apple cider, all while wearing the most fabulous sweaters and boots I own, Vail and Beaver Creak are always at the top of my winter wish list.

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