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venti iced. If you think about the transaction from the barista’s point of view, you will understand the importance of wording your order in order. And really, thinking about a transaction from the other person’s point of view is good practice for life in general, isn’t it? First, the barista needs to know what kind of cup to pick up. So, if you’re going to have a cold drink say that right up front – ICED blah blah blah – so that the barista knows to pick up a plastic cup. Next, the barista needs to know what size cup to pick up, so you say the Starbucks word for the size drink that you want. So if you want a large iced drink you start out by saying iced venti. Now the barista knows which cup to pick up and he or she can begin to think about what to put in it. If you’re like me and a venti cup of Starbucks regular coffee will have you doing a good imitation of Saint Vitus’ dance for the next three hours, then it’s crucial that you say “DECAFFEINATED” next. So far we have a tall, cold decaffeinated drink: ICED – VENTI – DECAF… (It’s permissible to abbreviate decaffeinated in spoken Starbucks). The next thing the barista needs to know is how many shots or which syrup will make the exact fancy drink that you have in mind. This is where you say flavors like cinnamon dolce or caramel. And you can add refinements, like “TRIPLE SHOT” if you’re looking for a ten-on-the-Richter-Scale jolt. This is also a time to customize your drink by adding some descriptors like “extra foam.” The name of the drink comes last: latte, espresso, macchiato, mocha, cappuccino or americano. So, if you’d like something big and cold and decaffeinated, perhaps you’d like an iced venti decaf nonfat, no-whip mocha. That happens to be my favorite Starbucks drink. I’ve given considerable thought to whether I ought to be saying “iced venti decaf SKINNY mocha.” Perhaps there’s some social implication attached to saying “non-fat, no-whip” as opposed to slipping in “skinny,” just as there is a social nuance attached to expression in any language. Last summer I heard an Englishwoman announce “I am going down to the sea.” We Philadelphians say “I’m going down a shore.” If you’re walking down Broad Street and you hear someone announce “I’m going down to the sea” you know they’re not from around here. See? Nuance. Learning the nuances of a language requires an immersion in the culture. Learning to speak Starbucks is good practice for learning any language. The process is


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