North Coast Journal 12-20-12 Edition
The North Coast Journal of Politics, People & Art is a guide to what’s really happening on the far North Coast of California.
6 Leo goes to Jamaica 8 Old fantasies never die 18 Crabbers, get your kayaks 36 Fountain, meet suds 37 Youâ€™re watching that movie? Really? 40 A big splash ~ us. Cellular Gettwo SlIIartphones lor the price • •• 01 one. • •• 6····~ ., SA MSUN G ~'t~ Hello Beller~ Say hello to the holidays with a great deal from U.S. Cellular.® Buy a stylish new Smart phone and get a second one free, backed by our award-winning network and customer service. uscellular.com amazon ,..;7 Shop millions of products wherever you go on ou go Limited time offer. Offer also ava ilable on these Smartphones: MOTOROLA ELECTRIFY™2 MOTOROLA ELECTRIFY™M Buy one at GALAXY 5·n Get one $99.99 FREE Samsung After S50 instant rebates that come as MasterCard® debit cards. Applicable Data Plans required. New 2-yr. agmts. and S30 device act fees may apply. Things we want you to know: New 2-yr. agmts. (subject toa pro-rated S150 early terminatIOn fee for feature phones, modems and hotspot devices and a S350 early termination fee for smartphones and tablets) required. Agmt terms apply as long as you are a cstmr. S30 device act fees and credit approval may apply. Regulatory Cost Recovery Fee applies (currently S140/Ilne/month): this is not a tax or gvmt required charge. Add. fees, taxes and terms apply and vary by svc. and eqmt See store or uscellular.com for details. Promotional phone subject tochange. U .S. Cellular MasterCard Debit Card issued by MetaBank pursuant to alicense from MasterCard International Incorporated Cardholders are subject to terms and conditions of the card as set forth by the issuing bank. Card does not have cash access and can be used a t any merchants that accept MasterCard debit cards. Card valid through expiration date shown on front of card. Allow 10-12weeks for processing. Smartphone Data Plans s tart at S20/month. Application and data network usage charges may apply when accessing applicatIOns. 80GO: Buy one smartphone and get asecond smartphone of thesame model for free. Kansas Customers: In areas in which U.S. Cellular receives support from the Federal Universal Service Fund, all reasonable req uests for service must be met Unresolved questions concerning services availability can be directed to the Kansas Corporation Comm ission Office of Public Affairs and Consumer Protection at 1-BOO-662-0027. limited tim e offer. Trademarks and trade n ames are the property of their respective owners. ©2012 U.S. Cellular 2 North Coast Journal • Thursday, Dec. 20, 2012 • northcoastjournal.com Many Romans feared that the city would be destroyed in 634, the 120th year of its founding. table of 5 5 6 Mailbox Poem News 31 The Hum The End (or whatever) Fire and ice Green Party 8 Blog Jammin’ 12 On The Cover 18 Get Out! a DVD Crab a la kayak 32 Music & More! 35 Calendar 37 Filmland 38 41 41 42 46 47 Workshops Sudoku Crossword Marketplace Body, Mind & Spirit Real Estate This Week Mordor? more like bored-or! The End of the world 19 In Review 20 McKinleyville Arts Night 22 Holiday Gift Guide Week 6 of 6: LAST ONE! Service directory 29 Home & Garden Some first-century Christians expected Jesus to return within one generation of his death. northcoastjournal.com • North Coast Journal • Thursday, Dec. 20, 2012 3 SENIOR DISCOUNT - 10% off on Tuesday - Anyone 60 & over STUDENT DISCOUNT - 10% off on Wednesday IS T MAS RA 12 DAYS OF CHR ay 11th D d w/bindings “Bur ton” Snowbo ar 12th Day Mountain Bike n” in w ch “S E N T E R T O W IN FFLE Live Well - Be Healthy, Naturally GROCERY Bob’s Red Mill 5lb. 100% Stone Ground, Whole Wheat & Whole Wheat Pastry Prices good from Dec. 19 to Dec. 27. While supplies last. PRODUCE Grower Direct Orland, CA Organic Satsuma Your Holiday Centerpiece is at Eureka Natural Foods right now! PRIME RIB • HAM • TURKEY BULK FOODS ALL NATURAL FLOUR Reg. $4.59 SALE MANDARINES ............. Organic #1 Garnet or Jewel $ 69 1 lb. $ 99 2 YAMS ................. Local Wild Rose Farms Blue Lake, CA 89¢lb. 2 Reg. $2.15 $ .....................................SALE Active Dry Organic Sunspire, 9 oz. Fair Trade 42% Semi-sweet SUGAR Organic ORGANIC CHOCOLATE CHIPS BRUSSEL $ 29 lb. SPROUTS ............ 149 Reg. $5.99 ......................SALE Imagine, 32 ﬂ. oz. Vegetable & Free Range Chicken $ 29 4 USA Grown Organic YELLOW ONIONS 69 lb. ¢ YEAST Organic Reg. $5.99 ......................SALE $ 99 3 1 DAIRY ORGANIC BROTH $ 49 Reg. $3.89 ...................SALE Arrowhead Mills, 10oz BLACK-EYED PEAS $ 39 Reg. $1.79 ......................SALE 2 Humboldt Creamery, 1 lb. ORGANIC SAVORY HERB STUFFING MIX $ 79 Reg. $3.99 ......................SALE Spectrum, 32 oz. 2 SWEET CREAM BUTTER BEVERAGES Lagunitas, 12 pk. bottle, I.P.A Reg. $2.99...............SALE Humboldt Creamery, 16 oz. $ 29 2 BEER ORGANIC CANOLA OIL Reg. $12.09 ...................SALE $ 99 7 ORGANIC HEAVY WHIPPING CREAM $ 99 Reg. $2.59 ......................SALE Organic Valley, 32. ﬂ. oz. ...................SALE $ 1539 Woodstock, 14 oz. Jellied, Whole 1 3 Reg. $17.19 Chacewater Vineyards, 750 ml, Cabernet or Zinﬁndel +TAX +CRV ORGANIC CRANBERRY SAUCE $ 99 Reg. $4.79 .....................SALE 2 ORGANIC EGGNOG Reg. $5.39 ......................SALE $ 99 ORGANIC WINE $ Reg. $14.69..............SALE 1079 +TAX MORE HOLIDAY SAVING THROUGHOUT THE STORE! 1450 Broadway, Eureka • 442-6325 • www.eurekanaturalfoods.com New Hours: Mon-Sat. 7:00 a.m. to 9 p.m. Sunday 8:00 a.m. to 9:00 p.m. Open til 9 p.m. Christmas Eve. CLOSED CHRISTMAS DAY 4 North Coast Journal • Thursday, Dec. 20, 2012 • northcoastjournal.com The Essenes, a sect of Jewish ascetics, saw the Jewish revolt against the Romans in 66–70 as the final end-time battle. Fire and Ice Some say the world will end in fire, Some say in ice. From what I’ve tasted of desire I hold with those who favor fire. But if it had to perish twice, I think I know enough of hate To say that for destruction ice Is also great And would suffice. — Robert Frost Cartoon by joel mielke Early Letters Deadline It’s almost time for Christmas. And New Year’s. And all sorts of other holidays that keep editors and page designers out of offices and printers out of print shops. Whee! I mean, the Journal regrets to inform you that we will have early deadlines Bond Fiasco Editor: The recent “expose” of school bonds (“The Big Borrow,” Dec. 6) in quite a few local school districts begs a few questions. How is it that a school board composed of well-meaning community volunteers is given the responsibility to make such far-reaching financial decisions without any mandated oversight? Are there not any laws in place that govern the structuring of bonds and their repayment schedule? It appears that these recently issued bonds were brought to fruition by private entities that profited (some would say usuriously) in both the short and long-term at the expense of taxpayers and ultimately our school children. The bond industry sharks were kept at bay in Trinidad only to prey upon other districts that weren’t quite as street smart. This whole bond fiasco reeks of the same stench as the mortgage loan, real estate bubble and economic meltdown crises. Elliott Levin, Trinidad Aboard the Stephanie Editor: Go Cody Hills! (“Backyard of Boats,” Dec. 6.) Not only are you honoring the Lazio and Alioto families’ legacies by restoring Stephanie, you are also carrying on for the Machis and Shelter Cove. My grandfather, Pop Machi (1877-1969) was born and raised in St. Elia, Sicily, and as a young man emigrated to the U.S. to settle in San Francisco. In 1909 he formed the San Francisco International Fish Company along with Tony Trapani and cousin Joe Alioto. The company evolved over the years and the partnership eventually included the Lazios. Both the Lazio and Alioto families came from the same fishing village in Sicily that my grandfather did. The Fish Company bought property at Shelter Cove in 1928, developing commercial fishing, mostly shipping out salmon. Pop’s eldest son, my dad, Tony, first came to the cove from San Francisco aboard one of the Fish Company’s vessels at age of 16 in 1928. It’s highly possible it was the International #3. Pop’s two other sons, my uncles Babe and Mario, would soon follow. The brothers worked on the dock during the summer of the late ’20s and early ’30s. In 1946, just after World War II, the Machi brothers bought the 40 acres surrounding the cove and began reestablishing and creating businesses that remain today. They left a legacy of sport and commercial fishing, motels, a campground, restaurant and snack bar, bar, tackle shop, boat launching and some pretty daring rescues. I keep a fond eye on Stephanie knowing my dad, uncles and grandfather walked her decks many years ago. Mary Ann Machi, Cutten for the next two weeks. Please email us your letters no later than 11:30 a.m. on Friday, Dec. 21, for our Dec. 27 edition and Friday, Dec. 28, for our Jan. 3 edition. As usual, please write no more than 300 words about something we’ve recently published, and include an address and a phone number where we can reach you that Friday morning. Happy holidays! l Various Christians in Europe had predicted the end of the world on Jan. 1, 1000. northcoastjournal.com • North Coast Journal • Thursday, Dec. 20, 2012 5 Dec. 20, 2012 Volume XXiii No. 51 North Coast Journal Inc. www.northcoastjournal.com ISSN 1099-7571 © Copyright 2012 CIRCULATION VERIFICATION C O U N C I L The North Coast Journal is a weekly newspaper serving Humboldt County. Circulation: 21,000 copies distributed FREE at more than 350 locations. Mail subscriptions: $39 / 52 issues. Single back issues mailed / $2.50. Entire contents of the North Coast Journal are copyrighted. No article may be reprinted without publisher’s written permission. Printed on recycled paper with soy-based ink. publisher Judy Hodgson firstname.lastname@example.org editor Carrie Peyton Dahlberg email@example.com art director Holly Harvey production manager Carolyn Fernandez staff writer/a&e editor Bob Doran firstname.lastname@example.org staff writer/copy editor Heidi Walters email@example.com staff writer Ryan Burns firstname.lastname@example.org calendar editor Andrew Goff email@example.com contributing writers John J. Bennett, Simona Carini, Barry Evans, William S. Kowinski, Mark Shikuma, Amy Stewart graphic design/production Lynn Jones, Alana Chenevert, Drew Hyland production intern Kimberly Hodges sales manager Mike Herring firstname.lastname@example.org advertising Colleen Hole email@example.com advertising Shane Mizer firstname.lastname@example.org advertising Karen Sack email@example.com office manager Carmen England classified assistant Sophia Dennler 310 F St., Eureka, CA 95501 PHoNe: 707 442-1400 faX: 707 442-1401 mail/office: Display case at the Emerald Cup holds samples of 202 cannabis strains submitted for judging. photo by Bob Doran Green Party By Bob Doran firstname.lastname@example.org Growers gather in Redway for the Emerald Cup press releases email@example.com letters to the editor firstname.lastname@example.org events/a&e email@example.com music firstname.lastname@example.org production email@example.com sales firstname.lastname@example.org classified/workshops email@example.com “Four Bigfoots of the Apocalypse,” illustration by Chris Henry / hellochrishenry.com T on the cover: • he crowd jostles for position around an octagonal glass case that glows in the dim light, peering in as if it held precious jewels. The case holds a couple of hundred green marijuana buds, entries in what’s billed as “the world’s only outdoor organic cannabis competition,” the annual Emerald Cup. Here in the Grower’s Pavilion tent, entrants are listed by number and strain, with breeding information that reads like something off a racing form. Entry No. 1, Obama Drone Strike, is a cross between Royal Kush and Humboldt Kush grown from seed. A clone strain called Three Kings is a cross between OG, Sour Diesel and Headband. Ringo OG takes its name from the master breeder, Lawrence Ringo, a botanical wizard who works with the Southern Humboldt Seed Collective. It’s Saturday, Dec. 15, and this is the ninth annual Emerald Cup. It’s the biggest so far with 202 entries in the bud contest, 40 more in categories for “concentrates” and “super concentrates” including hashish, hash oil and edibles. It’s also the first cup in Humboldt, after moving to the Mateel Community Center in Redway from its original home in the 6 North Coast Journal • Thursday, Dec. 20, 2012 • northcoastjournal.com Pope Innocent III predicted that the world would end in 1284, 666 years after the rise of Islam. Area 101 compound near Laytonville. People young and old — but mostly young and mostly male — cram into The Grower’s Pavilion, a long tent below the Mateel’s main hall. Many are ostensibly medical cannabis patients, although no one seems to be demanding 215 cards. A hay bale couch splits the room, and people sit to roll a joint or smoke a bowl. Vendors on either side offer classic bongs, the latest high tech vaporizers, books on cannabis, organic hydroponic supplies and bioengineered seeds so you can grow your own Blood Wreck Trinity Purple Urkle Space Queen. The Home Grown Stage at one end of the room has a DJ backing artists like Brooklyn-born Rasta Rocker T and Humboldt home grown reggae star Ishi Dube. At the other end, an Indian bedspread door leads to another tent where forums are held on growing organic weed, breeding new strains and using testing labs to analyze soil or crops. Standing in a cold drizzle outside of the pavilion, Emerald Cup founder Tim Blake offers a bit of history. (He had been worried that snow in the Mendocino hills would stop some from attending, but the event sold out). The first cup, in 2004, was his way of celebrating the cannabis harvest while emulating the sort of judging you find at a county fair for apples, jam or livestock. “It was more of a wild party,” he recalls, done on the cheap with no sponsors. It’s never made money. He almost abandoned it last year because of the federal crackdown on Mendocino’s medical pot scene but marshaled on. This year he lined up support from the Canadian cannabis culture magazine Skunk and the website WeedMaps.com among others and ramped things up a notch. Moving to the Mateel, augmented with a few tents, allowed for more attendees, more vendors and an enhanced education component with more panel discussions. Stand-up comic Ngaio Bealum is one of the emcee/moderators for panels in the Mateel Hall on topics like pot legalization, the federal crackdown, and cannabidiols, aka CBDs, compounds in the magic plant that reputedly cure everything from arthritis and Alzheimer’s to cancer. “I’m all for cannabis, at almost all the time, although it’s not for everyone,” says Ngaio, who also was at last year’s cup. “It’s a growth industry; it makes for sustainable jobs, jobs that won’t leave the county.” And, he points out, not just jobs for growers and trimmers: The industry creates ancillary jobs for soil and nutrient companies, alarm companies, accountants, lawyers and specialty magazines. Down in the Pavilion, a grower from Sonoma County stands between the bud display and another glass case holding fanciful glass bongs, awards that will be presented later like Oscars on Academy Award night. The 37-year-old grower calls himself Cherry Jack, borrowing the name from his entry in the contest, No. 162, a cherry phenotype of a strain called Jack the Ripper. “It just happens to smell like cherry; cherry lemonade or cherry Sweet-Tarts,” he explains, noting that the seeds come from Green Avengers Genetics, a company with a booth across the way. Cherry Jack makes part of his living growing medical cannabis; he’s also a day trader and a poker player, a gambler at heart. “And,” he adds, “I’m also a husband and a father of two, married 14 years.” Jack says he has a 215 card because glaucoma has made him blind in one eye. Cannabis hasn’t cured his glaucoma, but he says it reduces the pressure so he can cut back on prescription drugs. “This truly is medicine. Yes, it gets you high, gets you happy, but it’s more than that.” He says he entered the Emerald Cup competition because he’s “a true believer in medical cannabis” and because he wanted to see how he’d stack up again against “the local competition.” Local, in this case, is the fabled Emerald Triangle, Humboldt, Mendocino and Trinity counties, birthplace of designer cannabis. And the competition is fierce. Along with the bong awards come major bragging rights. And this year, the grower behind the top strain wins a trip to Jamaica as first prize. A nine-judge panel, nicknamed the Supreme Court, chooses the winners after a blind tasting. Each judge gets a bag with one-gram samples of each strain, and rates them for looks, smell, taste and, most important (scored double) is how it makes you feel: the high. “Some make you happy, some make you crabby,” says Judge Pearl, who like most of the other judges would only provide her first name. “I like the ones that pick me up and make me creative.” Once each judge has a score for all samples, they gather to compare notes, resample as needed, and then reach consensus on 20 winners. Before the winners are announced, cup organizers give civil rights lawyer Tony Serra a lifetime achievement award for his work in marijuana law reform — a glass bong in the shape of Lady Justice holding her scales. Speaking of his long, “wondrous romance” with cannabis and the law, Serra promises, “I’m not finished yet.” Two of the judges, a woman introduced only as Nicky and a white-bearded man called Swami, let the honors roll. They work through a long list, offering judges’ comments on the top strains. Second place goes to No. 23, Cry Baby OG, grown from a clone with “diesel Lemon Pledge unwhirling flavor,” according to Swami. As the tension mounts, Nicky wonders aloud, “Who’s going to Jamaica?” The grand prize winner is strain No. 47, listed only as a Chemdog. Strain history: “Ask Jerry Garcia.” The judges describe 47 as “the smoothest yet, A-plus crystals, very sticky, ridiculous überstink, nasturtium and gasoline and fresh earth, complex, enticing — top notch shit.” With his carefully trimmed goatee, his hair combed up to a semi-Mohawk peak, the exultant winner, identified only as Leo, doesn’t have the working man look of most of the other growers. He explains that his strain is a cross of Chemdog No. 4 and Star Dog, a creation of his new company, Aficionado Seeds. He thanks his girlfriend and makes a major shout out to his homies (“This is for you, Laytonville!”) with special thanks to his soil supplier who “makes the best compost in the world.” A little while later, down in the Grower’s Pavilion, Leo still seems amazed that he won. He recalls dreaming about growing pot when he was serving in the military during the Iraq war, stationed in Baghdad. Now he is living that dream. With a cold, half-smoked joint in one hand, he finally reads the laminated certificate he holds in the other and it registers. “I can’t believe I’m going to Jamaica,” he says with a huge smile before adding, “Hey, does anyone have a lighter?” l The black plague spread across Europe from 1346–1351. northcoastjournal.com • North Coast Journal • Thursday, Dec. 20, 2012 7 Blog Jammin’ CRIME / BY CARRIE PEYTON DAHLBERG / DEC. 18, 3:08 P.M. Pedreros to be Hospitalized Claudia Pedreros will be sent to a state mental hospital next month, her attorney said Tuesday, after being found not guilty by reason of insanity on Monday in the death of her daughter. Pedreros was accused of drowning the 2½ -year-old girl in the Trinity River in 2011. (See “Robert’s Vow,” in the North Coast Journal in June 2011. Her trial had both a guilt phase and a sanity phase, and both concluded Monday, said attorney Russ Clanton. A jury found her guilty of involuntary manslaughter and child abuse then concluded she was insane at the time of those crimes. ● ECONOMY, EMPLOYMENT, GOVERNMENT / BY RYAN BURNS / DEC. 17, 5:04 P.M. Ancient Study Returns from the Dead Tuesday afternoon, the Humboldt County Board of Supervisors will consider a resolution that at ﬁrst glance looks like a simple declaration of “Yay jobs! Let’s go get us some!” But the document (pdf on our website) would appear to commit the county to a variety of ambitious economic development projects based on some dubious claims made in an economic report from 1997, back when Bill Clinton was president, Titanic ruled the box ofﬁce and The Spice Girls were tearing up the charts. The resolution, which was prepared by an amorphous citizens committee called the Humboldt Bay Harbor Working Group, is nearly identical to one that’s been making the rounds of local city councils, with vocal support from east-west rail advocates. It is being brought to the board by First District Supervisor Rex Bohn and Fourth District Supervisor Virginia Bass. As we reported back in August, the document cites ﬁgures from a 15- (now almost 16-) year-old report by the late U.C. Berkeley economist Dr. John Quigley, who had been hired by the Humboldt Bay Harbor, Recreation and Conservation District to analyze the ﬁnancial impact of a variety of port development projects. These included deepening the harbor, which has since been completed. At the time the report was written, the north-south rail line through the Eel River Canyon was still up and running. Even when the report was released in January 1997, Quigley’s rosy projections of our harbor’s economic potential were deemed by many to be “unrealistic.” (See links on our site to a 1997 Journal story and a 1998 memo to business leaders written by Gregg Foster, then with the Humboldt Area Foundation.) In the years since, the Harbor District has updated its economic strategy several times, including a 2007 strategic plan that relied on more current data and analysis. The Quigley report is so old that the harbor district doesn’t even keep it around anymore. The Journal sent an email to each supervisor this morning asking for comment on the resolution. Second District Supervisor Clif Clendenen said he wanted to check with the harbor district — the designated lead agency for all things port-related — to make sure the resolution dovetails with its efforts, but he had yet to do so. Third District Supervisor Mark Lovelace said, “I am concerned about the use of old and un-veriﬁable data, but I’m also concerned about bypassing both the Harbor District and our ongoing Prosperity 2012 process, and committing the county to two separate, year-long planning processes without any deﬁned scope, budget or stafﬁng.” The processes Lovelace refers to are laid out in the resolution’s six action items, which follow a long string of whereases. The ﬁrst process would commit the county to “developing within one year a cohesive and coordinated marketing plan … to attract maritimeoriented businesses to Humboldt Bay.” The second process would have the county work with the harbor district to “create a one-year planning process” to boost port activity by 2025. Port marketing and development are already within the purview of the harbor district. The resolution also asks the board to commit to supporting — and promoting — a rail connection to the national rail system, deep-draft container shipping, an offshore ﬁshing reef, a marine highway and more. We have yet to hear from Supervisors Bohn, Bass or Fifth District Supervisor Ryan Sundberg. ● ADVICE, COMMUNITY / BY HEIDI WALTERS / DEC. 14, 5:44 P.M. John (Still) Says “Forgive” A small plaque has appeared on the white wall of the Clarke Museum near where John Tutuska used to sit meditating in the sun. Tutuska, well-known and beloved by many in town, died in October, and Clarke Street Plaza overﬂowed with mourners several weeks after. One of his dying requests, says his friend Lynna Ridgeway, was that a plaque 8 NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 20, 2012 • northcoastjournal.com Martin Luther predicted the end of the world would occur no later than 1600. be placed on the wall with a saying he chose from “A Course in Miracles,” a book whose guidance he followed and shared with others. The Clarke Museum approved the request, Ridgeway used money from Tutuska’s estate to produce the plaque, and on Dec. 7 the museum’s incoming board president, Roy Sheppard, installed it. Ridgeway says Tutuska chose a statement from the “Course” that “means that when an old grievance is forgiven it becomes a sacred experience enlightening the time and space around it.” Long-time Old Town frequenters likely will recall the sign Tutuska placed in his apartment window, above Ramone’s, that simply said, “Forgive.” COURTS, MEDICAL / BY HEIDI WALTERS / DEC. 14, 4:32 P.M. Pain Doc Loses Her License Effective at 5 p.m. today, former Eureka doctor Fran Day will not be allowed to practice medicine in the state of California. The doctor’s license already had been suspended for more than two years. Today the Medical Board of California ofﬁcially revoked it, after Day, who specialized in pain treatment and psychiatry and practiced medicine since 1989, failed to respond or ﬁle a Notice of Defense to accusations ﬁled with the medical board against her by several patients in October 2010. Day’s accusers said she “engaged in repeated acts of unprofessional conduct” and gross negligence, including prescribing lithium to a patient who had tried to commit suicide with a lithium overdose two weeks before; prescribing controlled substances to addicts; prescribing drugs without ﬁrst conducting an examination and checking with the patients’ other doctors and consulting medical records; and prescribing “excessive doses of controlled substances.” Day also was accused of being “grossly negligent in her management” of a patient who had an overdose. That latter patient, called “E.C.” in the medical board’s documents, also complained to the Humboldt County District Attorney’s ofﬁce, and the D.A. ﬁled charges in April 2011 accusing Day of prescribing controlled substances to ﬁve patients, including E.C., known to be addicts; self-prescribing a controlled substance; and delaying or obstructing an emergency medical technician. (The Journal reported on this alleged incident back in March 2010, after Day had disappeared and taken with her all of her patients’ medical records. The mother of the patient claimed Day clung to the ambulance as it tried to drive away. Day told us her side of the story in July 2010.) In September 2011, Day pled no contest to four counts of felony prescribing to an addict. She was sentenced to four years probation, 90 days in custody and 500 community service hours. She also was ordered not to practice medicine. You can read the entire decision by the medical board, including opinions from a medical expert on the various drugs Day prescribed for patients with conditions including bi-polar disorder, on the board’s website. ● continued on page 11 Astrologers predicted a world-ending deluge on Feb. 1, 1524. After their first prophecy failed they recalculated the date to Feb. 1, 1624. northcoastjournal.com • NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 20, 2012 9 City of Eureka - City of Arcata - City of Fortuna - City of Rio Dell - City of Ferndale - City of Blue Lake - City of Trinidad - Humboldt Bay Municipal Water District County of Humboldt - A Vacuum Cleaner Hospital- Adult Day Health Center - AirTight Heating & Sheet Metal- Alcohol Drug Care Services - Arcata Scrap & Salvage Arcata Liquor -Arcata Technology Center - Arrow Property Management - Art Center Frame Shop - AT&T - Balanced Aquarium & Spa - Banana Hut & Hawaiian BBQ Bear River Band of Rohnerville Rancheria - Bella Baskets - Berolina Salon and Spa - Bill Obrien's State Farm Insurance - Bloxham's Shell - Blue Lake Union School Branding Iron Saloon - Butler Valley, Incorporated - Calgon Carbon Corp. - California Department of Fish & Game - California Indian Legal Services Calvary Baptist Church - Campton Heights Baptist Church - Campton Heights Cafe - Campton Heights Market - Casa of Humboldt - Cash & Carry Central Sandwich - Chautauqua Natural Foods - Church of the Joyful Healer - Coast Central Credit Union - Companion Animal Foundation - Corsetti & Noyes Crestwood Behavior Health Center - Dan's Auto Electric Inc - Darin Thomsen Construction - Days Inn & Suites in Arcata DelReka Distributing - Domino's Pizza - Dow's Prairie Grange #505 - E & J Market - Englund Marine - Eureka Brake & Automotive Eureka First United Methodist Church - Ferndale High School Ferndale Elementary School - Faith Center Four Square Church FirstCongregational UnitedChurchofChrist- First FiveHumboldt - Fish Brothers - FortunaAdventist Community Services: HART Fortuna Fire Department - Fortuna Union High School District - Freeman Architects: Janssen Malloy Law; Omicini Building Freshwater Elementary & Charter Middle School Franklins Service Gaining Ground Services Garfield School District - Glidden Professional Paint - Golden Harvest Cafe Eureka - Gracelyn Care Home Greater Rural Rescue Society - Gross Family LLC - Hagood's Hardware - Harris St Market and Liquor HCAR Healthsport Fortuna Heuer's Florist - Heritage Antique & Coin - Hoopa Valley Tribe Hotel Arcata: Big Lagoon Rancheria - Humboldt Patient Resource Center - Humboldt Performance Automotive Humboldt Petroleum Inc. - Humboldt State University Bookstore - Ironside Metal - Jacoby Creek School Jessicurl - King Chiropractic - Klamath Trinity Joint Unified School District - L.:s Kitchen - Law Office of Lawrence Eitzen Los Bagels - Lube Central - Mad River Brewing Company Masaki's Kyoto Japanese Restaurant Mid Klamath Watershed Council - Miranda's Rescue Thrift Store - Myrtle Wood Liquors & John's Cigars New Life Service Company - North Coast Dance North Coast Fabricators - North Coast Ophthalmology North Coast Resource Center - 0 & M Industries - Old Town Coffee & Chocolates - Pachanga Mexicana Restaurant - Pacific Paradise Parkside Hair Design & Little Peoples Corner - Peninsula Union School District - Pepsi Beverage Company - Peterson Cat Fortuna Plaza Grill- Post-Haste Mail Center Inc. - Quality Body - Works - R & S Supply Real Property Management & Maintenance Inc. - Reddaway - Redwood Capital Bank - Redwood Coast Music Festivals - Redwood Park Lodge - Redwoods Leavitt Insurance - Renaissance Computing - Renner Petroleum - Restaurant HANA Round Table Pizza - Rynecki and Rynecki, LLC - S & H Auto Machine - Sal's Off Broadway - Salvation Army - Sander's Funeral Home - Sea Grill Sellers Building: Joint Ventures - Sequoia Park Zoo - Shelly's Indianola Market - Shotz Coffee - Sidelines Sports Bar - Sizzler - SN Servicing Corporation Stewart Telecommunications - Stodder Properties - Subway - Sun Valley Floral Farms - Super 8 Fortuna - Swanlund's Camera - Ten Window Williams Jewelers The Ferndale Museum - Toby & Jack's - Tofu Shop - Tomo Japanese Restaurant - Tri-County Independent Living - Trinidad Union School District - Visiting Angels Western Web - Westside Community Improvement Association: Jefferson Project - Wild berries Marketplace - & 3,083 households 10 North Coast Journal â€˘ Thursday, Dec. 20, 2012 â€˘ northcoastjournal.com Rabbi Sabbatai Zevi of Smyrna, Turkey, used the Kabbalah to calculate the arrival of the Messiah in 1648. continued from page 9 Blog Jammin’ Guarding Hoopa LAW ENFORCEMENT / BY HEIDI WALTERS / DEC. 14, 11:38 A.M. ● CONSERVATION, ENVIRONMENT, OCEAN / BY RYAN BURNS / DEC. 13, 4:28 P.M. Marine Protected Areas to Go Active Next Week New marine protected areas will go into effect next Wednesday, Dec. 19. (See a clickable map on our website for their location and dimensions.) These “underwater parks” are the result of a long and at times contentious process, though stakeholders here on the north coast managed to reach consensus on where the protected areas should Inmate Dies in Humboldt County Jail ● There’s not much information in this press release about what might have caused READ FULL POSTS AND SEE PHOTOS AT be. (No other region in the state managed that feat.) As with state parks, the marine protected areas are designed to preserve precious and sensitive ecosystems from human disturbance. A press release issued earlier today by Ocean Conservancy and the Natural Resources Defense Council said in part: On December 19, Californians will celebrate the grand opening of a series of underwater parks — also called marine protected areas — that aim to create a more sustainable future. … The 19 underwater parks span from just south of Fort Bragg up to the Oregon border, covering approximately 137 square miles, or 13 percent of the region. They include Pyramid Point’s rugged coastline; Point St. George Reef, home to the second largest nesting seabird colony south of Alaska; and waters at the mouth of waterways like Ten Mile River that are critical for salmon and steelhead populations. … The network protects an average of nearly 16 percent of California waters. For more information visit www.dfg. ca.gov/mlpa or www.caloceans.org.” The King Tide Rules WATER / BY ANDREW GOFF / DEC. 13, 11:29 A.M. This morning at 10:46 a.m., was when the North Coast was predicted to have its highest tide of 2012, i.e. THE KING TIDE. So the Journal went out and took pictures. Yup. Lots o’ water (9.5 ft at the Eureka Slough Bridge). If you happened to be out and about gawking at high tideage too, and you’d like your pictures to do more than claim bytes on your hard drive, Humboldt Baykeeper is soliciting shots for its 2012 King Tide Photo Initiative. For more details email KingTidePhotos@gmail.com or call 268-8897. You know how, when you ride the Madaket, you have to descend down that plank? Well, that plank was just ’bout level today. See our website for more pictures. ● PRESS RELEASES / BY RYAN BURNS / DEC. 12, 11:38 A.M. the death of a 35-year-old inmate at the county jail this morning. The Sheriff’s Ofﬁce simply says there is “no sign of foul play.” Here’s the press release: On 12-12-2012, approximately 6:40 am a Humboldt County Correctional Ofﬁcer was notiﬁed by an inmate that another inmate, identiﬁed as Jonathan Michael Sorrell, 35 years from Hoopa, was having a medical issue. The Correctional Ofﬁcer immediately went to Sorrell’s aid and called for jail medical, extra correctional staff and an ambulance to respond. Initially Sorrell was breathing, however while the Correctional Staff was with Sorrell he stopped breathing and they began C.P.R. until they were relieved by jail medical staff. After an ambulance arrived at the facility a physician determined that Sorrell was deceased. The Humboldt County Coroner was summoned to the scene. There is no sign of foul play. An autopsy will be scheduled by the Humboldt County Coroners Ofﬁce to determine the cause of death. ● Following his failed prediction of 1648, Zevi recalculated the world would end in 1666. northcoastjournal.com • NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 20, 2012 www.northcoastjournal.com/blogthing 11 The Hoopa Valley Tribe is forming a national guard, of sorts, to protect the land and tribal members from the human dangers that lurk in its woods, the Two Rivers Tribune reports. The new Hoopa Tribal Citizen Corps arose in response to “months of incidents caused by non-tribal members trespassing on tribal lands.” The Tribune story offers many examples of these scary run-ins, including this one: On the evening of October 14 and early morning of October 15, four young men from Hoopa were on an outing in the woods eight or nine miles up Mill Creek Road when they stumbled across an illegal white plastic irrigation line that stretched as far as they could see. Within minutes they were being hunted through the woods with gunshots ringing in the air. The ordeal lasted more than four hours. They were eventually rescued after they texted a friend, who relayed the messages to Hoopa Tribal Police. A link to the story is on our website. A TALE OF TWO TIDES: PEASANT TIDE (LEFT) AND KING TIDE (RIGHT). PHOTOS BY ANDREW GOFF One Little Doomsday and How It Grew By Carrie Peyton Dahlberg I t was an obscure dating system of a long-dead civilization. Then one paragraph in a 1966 book. Then a foreign ﬁlm. A U.S. television special. More books and a ﬂurry of magazines. A worldwide harmonic convergence. And in retrospect, that was the small stuff. After the Internet hit, and social networks showed how quickly panic can go pandemic, the thing wrapped itself around our imaginations like a python. It’s 2012. We’re all gonna die. Or become enlightened. Or something. “There’s conspiracy theory versions, Christian versions, Buddhist and Muslim versions. … Once technology started to let it go viral, it became this sort of monster.” That’s Kevin Whitesides, who wrote a thesis on 2012 millennialism for his master’s degree in religious studies at the University of Edinburgh in Scotland. Whitesides did his undergraduate work at Humboldt State University, and he’s back in Eureka for now before starting on his doctorate. If you’ve got a 2012 question, he probably knows the answer. He knows where the French have cordoned off a mountain path, worried it will be overrun by people hoping to survive the coming ﬂood. He knows about the panicked emails NASA keeps getting, asking about planetary collisions. He knows that of the 3,000 or so recent books delving into the year of doom, 1,000-plus have “2012” emblazoned on their covers. He knows that back in 1987, thousands of people converged on sacred spots worldwide because a onetime art history professor named Jose Arguelles said it would avert the 2012 Armageddon. “His idea was that they needed to get 144,000 people to go to these sacred sites all over the world and just sort of meditate and pray at the same time,” Whitesides said. “If that didn’t happen then we’d be on the road to bad things in 2012 KEVIN WHITESIDES, WHOSE PASSION FOR THINGS APOCRYPHAL BEGAN AT HSU, PLANS TO JOIN OTHER SCHOLARS ON DEC. 21 AT THE MAYAN SITE CHICHEN ITZA. PHOTO BY DREW HYLAND … and if it did, utopia in 2012.” Press reports on actual attendance are widely contradictory, Whitesides said, but at the time Arguelles told the media that it worked. Oh, and that round calendar, the iconic image of Mayan doom? Whitesides points out that it’s Aztec, not Mayan. No one has found any Mayan calendars, at least in the physical sense of a stone, mural or monument meant to depict the passage of time. There are just dates, found on artifacts here and there, from which a calendar system has been deduced. The leap from a few dates to global disaster began in this one paragraph that Whitesides sent us from Michael Coe’s book, The Maya: “The idea of cyclical creations and destructions is a typical feature of Mesoamerican religions, as it is of Oriental. The Aztec, for instance, thought that the universe had passed through four such ages, and that we were now in the ﬁfth, to be destroyed by earthquakes. The Maya thought along the same lines, in terms of eras of great length, like the Hindu kalpas. There is a suggestion that each of these measured 13 baktuns, or something less than 5,200 years, and that Armageddon would overtake the degenerate peoples of the world and all creation on the ﬁnal day of the thirteenth. Thus, following the Thompson correlation, our present universe would have been created in 3113 BC, to be annihilated on December 24, 2011, when the Great Cycle of the Long Count reaches completion.” Uh, yeah. Last year. Coe tweaked the dates in later editions. There have been lots of other troubling 2012 dates, too, but Dec. 21 has edged ahead in popular imagination, although the exact timing seems iffy. Maybe sunrise. Maybe 11:11, but whether a.m. or p.m. is disputed. Whitesides will watch Dec. 21 unfold at Chichen Itza on Mexico’s Yucatan Peninsula, where he’ll be joining a group of scholars. Around the world, he expects parties and indifference, enlightenment and death. “I have no doubt that people will have all sorts of spiritual epiphanies,” he said. “There’s going to be all sorts of self-fulﬁlling prophesies,” because believers are psychologically primed for something big, in good ways or in bad. “There will be lots of unfortunate situations with people getting really scared or thinking they know what to do, like jump off a rock and fall into a time portal.” Please don’t. ● 12 NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 20, 2012 • northcoastjournal.com Christopher Columbus claimed that the world was created in 5343 BCE, and would last 7,000 years. The Signs and Wonders THE CLOSER THE DATE CAME, THE HARDER THEY WERE TO MISS. Signs and wonders. The natural order upended. These were the signs that the End Times were near: Laughing over the general plan and enjoying Old Town, Rex Bohn and Mark Lovelace shared an eerily blossoming friendship. N All at once, county residents decided they were tired of reggae and the Grateful Dead. N That smell really was a skunk. N N At Humboldt State University, administrators took a voluntary, 50 percent pay cut, dedicating the savings to hiring more professors and installing zip-lines to the top of Founders Hall. N A ﬂight from SFO arrived on time. N N Activist agitator “Verbena” issued a press release saying, “Actually, some cops aren’t so bad.” N A freight train rolled into Eureka. N Forecast Wednesday, Dec. 19 Thursday, Dec. 20 Friday, Dec. 21 Saturday, Dec. 22 The forecast went frighteningly fogless. N PHOTO BY ANDREW GOFF | DIGITAL ART BY HOLLY HARVEY Acknowledging it’s tough to survive on minimum wage, Walmart began negotiating with labor unions. PHOTO BY ANDREW GOFF | DIGITAL ART BY HOLLY HARVEY N Ferndale High School received an NAACP Image Award. N Ravens helped snowy plovers feed their little hatchlings. N Back-to-the-landers lined up at the planning department to get building permits. N A snow-white narwhal came into Humboldt Bay and hung around near the F Street dock, allowing locals to try to toss doughnuts onto its horn. N — North Coast Journal staff The Arcata City Council approved special economic incentives to replace Tomo Japanese Restaurant with a Hooters. N McKinley grew a second thumb. N continued on next page Mathematician Jacob Bernoulli predicted a comet would destroy the earth on April 5, 1719. northcoastjournal.com • NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 20, 2012 PHOTOS BY DREW HYLAND 13 t o s i m p l i f y & e n j o y l i f e m o r e , s t o p & c o n s u m e o n e e N C H A N t e D B r o W N I e . D i l u t e b y s h a r i n g w i t h f r i e n d s . EncHanTEd BrowniE THE GrEaTEST cHocolaTE JoUrnEy yoU can TakE Failure to Never DoN’t Stop may or may not result in one or more of the following: gas, bloating, birth defects, addiction, diabetes, diarrhea, erectile dysfunction, fever, glaucoma, hair loss, anemia, headache, hypertension, insomnia, deafness, kidney failure, death, depression, lactic acidosis, liver failure, melasma, irreversible peripheral neuropathy, rhabdomyolysis, seizures, stroke, tardive dyskinesia, spontaneous tendon rupture, m u m p s , m e a s l e s , c h i c k en pox, etc & etc. 69501 HWY 101 North, Leggett. 925-6444 The Peg House I n s e r t c r a z y r e l i g i o u s d i a t r i b e h e r e . t h e s e b r o w n i e s w i l l s e n d y o u o n a j o u r n e y o n G o d ’ s S p a c e s h i p e a r t h ! continued from previous page of Unusual Size The Four Bigfoots of the Apocalypse ▲ DR. PAUL DOMANCHUK OPTOMETRIST I S ION VCENTER THE O By Ryan Burns quering everything in his path.” The second sighting came last Thursday when a Bigfoot reportedly ransacked the campsite of a family visiting from Red Bluff. “He run off as soon as we pulled in here,” recalled Joseph Logan, whose wife and daughters declined to be interviewed. “Weird thing is, though, as soon as he disappeared into them woods all the other critters started attackin’ each other.” Logan said that dogs from a neighboring campsite began ﬁghting, followed by the birds in the trees and the creatures of the earth. “And lo, we hightailed it out of there,” Logan said. “Place done turned evil.” A third reported sighting happened just two nights later, when McKinleyville resident Rhonda Simmons had to swerve off the road to avoid what she called “a friggin’ huge black Bigfoot.” “It just stepped into the middle of my lane and stared me down,” she recalled, her voice quavering at the memory. “My headlights — they made his eyeballs glow this creepy blue. He was looking right at me.” Simmons said she screeched to a halt beneath a billboard that read “Nothing’s too hard for Jesus” and looked back to see the black beast running straight toward her. “It was breathing heavy and growling,” she said. “And I know this sounds crazy, but it sounded like words, like ‘one two, two one,’ over and over.” Simmons believes that the Bigfoot was referring to the date of Dec. 21, which ancient Mayan calendars and the Internet have designated as doomsday. On Monday afternoon, outside Ray’s Food Place, the Journal spoke to a glassy-eyed kale farmer named Pete Moss and a rotund biker who gave the name Hollis “Jumbo” Hell. Moss wore only a bejeweled trucker’s cap and green corduroy overalls while Hell was dressed in ﬂip-ﬂops, black jeans and a puffy gold the Jan. 3, 2013 edition deadline is Wednesday Dec. 26 442-1400 www.northcoastjournal.com 310 F Street • Eureka • 95501 NORTH NORTH COAST COAST JOURNAL JOURNAL • THURSDAY, • THURSDAY, DEC. DEC. 20, 20, 2012 2012 • northcoastjournal.com • northcoastjournal.com 666 14 In 1806 an English hen laid eggs on which “Christ is coming” was written. It was discovered to be a hoax and chicken abuse. BIGFOOT ILLUSTRATIONS BY CHRIS HENRY / HELLOCHRISHENRY.COM ▲ Providing Eye Care & Eye Wear for over 50 years. 616 H STREET • EUREKA 443-1619 EARLY HOLIDAY DEADLINES edition deadline is Wednesday Dec. 19 post-apocalypse the Dec. 27, 2012 ver the last couple of weeks, eyewitnesses in the Willow Creek area have reportedly spotted several loping, bipedal mammals which they believe to be harbingers of End Times. Many locals, noting similarities to Biblical prophecies, have concluded that the mysterious creatures must be the Four Bigfoots of the Apocalypse. “Oh, they’re deﬁnitely ’squatches,” said local celebrity researcher James “Bobo” Fay. “I been ’squatchin for 25 years now, and this here’s the real deal.” Fay, best known for co-hosting the Animal Planet program “Finding Bigfoot,” followed this pronouncement with his impression of the elusive beast’s vocalizations. Cupping his hands to his mouth, he emitted a long, mournful bellow. “Kina like that,” he said with a faraway stare, “like a sireny kinda sound.” The ﬁrst reported sighting happened two weeks ago along the banks of the Trinity River, not far from local bookseller Bigfoot Books. “That’s not a coincidence,” said store owner Steven Streufert. “I see ’em around here all the time.” But this Bigfoot behaved differently than any the bookseller had seen before. “He was aggressive,” Streufert said. “He conquered that picnic table over there. Picked it up and tossed it like a toy. In fact, he seemed intent on conquering stuff. Conquered a propane tank over at the hardware store. Conquered a little freckly kid, and then just took off into the woods, con- 49ers jacket. Both men said they’d come to town in hopes of spotting a Bigfoot. “Plus I’m in Dutch with the wife,” Hell admitted. Moss leaned on a stack of plasticwrapped ﬁrewood bundles, an American Spirit in one hand and fried chickenon-a-stick in the other. “They’re naturally shy,” he said, referring to Bigfoots, presumably. Just then, a towering ﬁgure, covered head-to-toe in matted yellow fur, emerged from behind the outdoor ice machines. Moss, Hell and this reporter stared in disbelief at its distended burlap ﬁngers, its wet, staved-in nose and the clouds of hot breath rising from its sallow lips. The immense beast — a healthy male, we couldn’t help but notice — was ﬁxated on an apoplectic terrier yapping in the back of a nearby Subaru. Hunched and wheezy, the Bigfoot smelled of vomit and brewer’s yeast. Distracted by the slavering mutt, the golden Sasquatch ignored us — until Hell, trembling with excitement, fumbled his bag of Skittles and sent a rosary of rainbow candies clattering to the asphalt. The fearsome blond Chewbacca did a double take and, with a panicked fart, turned on his leathery heel and sprinted east, taking huge, bounding strides through the parking lot of the Raging Creek diner. Moss dropped his meat stick and ran after the creature shouting, “Behold, a pale Bigfoot!” And the smell that rolled off him was death. And Hell followed with him. ● Zombie Red Cross workers Shaina Mason and Philip Anderson, coordinators of the Zombie Invasion of Bayshore Mall Photo by Bob Doran Zombie Apocalypse By Bob Doran Be prepared, and you just might make it Naturopathic Medicine - Helping You Be Well Naturally Bringing a Natural Medicine Approach to both Primary Care and Consultation In Association with Dr. Beverly Copeland, MD DR. CHERE EDGAR, ND Naturopathic Doctor 1727 Central Ave, McKinleyville, CA (707) 840-0556 Now Accepting New Patients P hilip Anderson didn’t look too far gone. Blood was dripping from his mouth, his shirtsleeve was torn, he was pale and his eyes were slightly sunken. But his demeanor was positively chipper. Anderson was happily teaching the living how to survive the zombie apocalypse. This was back in October during the Zombie Invasion of Bayshore Mall, but what Anderson knows as a Red Cross preparedness coordinator could come in really handy now, what with the end of the world and all. “The zombie invasion is like every other major disaster,” he said. The basic message, boiled down by Zombie Phil, was borrowed from the Boy Scouts: “Be prepared.” Say for example, “You can’t get to the grocery store because there’s zombies in the way.” You’ll need to have some food on hand. “And if you’re bitten by a zombie, what are you going to do? Do you have a first aid kit?” The Red Cross suggests getting food and first aid supplies ready in a “go kit” that you can pick up and run with. Think about including water, a flashlight, batteries, family contact information, and more. “And how are you going to escape your house if zombies are inside? You need to know the escape routes,” Anderson said. The overall message: Yes, you can make it past the end of the world — or other less spectacular disasters like earthquakes or tsunamis. The well-prepared Armageddon survivor will need a “go kit” for life on the run, plus basic supplies for hunkering down at home in case that looks like a better way to keep on breathing. The Red Cross recommends getting ready with: • Water: one gallon per person, per day (plan for three days of evacuation or two weeks at home without help) • Food: Non-perishable, easy-to-prepare items for three days to two weeks • Flashlight • Batteries • First aid kit • Battery-powered or hand-crank radio (ideally a NOAA Weather Radio) • Cell phone with chargers • Multi-purpose tool • Toothbrush (and other sanitation and personal hygiene items) • Medications (7-day supply) and other medical needs • Copies of personal documents (passports, birth certificates, proof of address, deed/lease to home, insurance policies, medications list and medical info) • Family and emergency contact information • Emergency blanket • Maps • Cash • Personalized supplies: Baby bottles, diapers, leashes, pet dishes, etc. • Extras: Matches, rain gear, towels, work gloves, tools/supplies for securing your home, extra clothing, hat and sturdy shoes, plastic sheeting, duct tape, scissors, bleach, blankets or sleeping bags, whistle, N95 or surgical masks and a long, sharp blade for severing zombie brain from zombie spine — the only known way to “neutralize” one. l While you’ve still got time, check out more world’s end preparedness advice at www.savingzombies.com. continued on next page Treating the Underlying Causes of Illness * Prevention * Weight Loss * Homeopathy * Fewer Prescriptions The Headwaters Fund challenged Humboldt County to match them, dollar for dollar, in the effort to attract more air service to our airport. These leaders in the community stepped up and contributed because they knew that the community benefits directly from competition at our airport, fewer delays, and local construction jobs. We Did It! We’re talking with airlines now! Advanced Security American Hydroponics Azalea Business Support Bear River Band of Rohnerville Blue Lake Rancheria Baroni Designs Carter Hotel Cassandra Hesseltine/Carpe Diem Cher-Ae Heights Casino Chris Lehman City Ambulance of Eureka City of Arcata City of Blue Lake City of Eureka City of Ferndale City of Fortuna City of Trinidad Cypress Grove Chevre David Somerville Denise McNulty & Associates. Dockal & Associates Dr James & Virginia Fisher Eric Weems Eureka Payments GHD Good Relations GoodKind Organics Green Diamond Resource Harper Motors HealthSport Humboldt Area Foundation Humboldt Association of Realtors Humboldt Bay Harbor District Humboldt Bay Municipal Water District Humboldt County Convention and Visitors Bureau Humboldt Investment Capital Humboldt Land Title Humboldt Moving & Storage Humboldt State University Hunter Hunter & Hunt James Poovey Jessicurl Joan Brady Larry Hewitt/Thule Lost Coast Communications McKinleyville Chamber of Commerce Mercer Fraser Mid City Motor World Ming Tree McKinleyville Northern California Community Blood Bank O&M Industries Opie Hendricks/Avis Car Rentals PG&E Premier Financial Group Recology Humboldt County Redwood Capital Bank Renner Petroleum Reprop Investments Inc Republic Parking Systems Schmidbauer Lumber Inc. Sequoia Personnel SHN Consulting Engineers Thule/Larry Hewitt Times Printing Wild Planet Foods Inc. Wildwood Manufacturing Wing Inflatables Inc. Zwerdling, Bragg, & Mainzer Special Thanks to Don Banducci, Mary Keehn, Liana Simpson, Mike Newman, Chris Lehman, Gregg Foster, and the Arcata & Eureka Chambers Many people thought the Crimean War (1853–1856) was the Battle of Armageddon. northcoastjournal.com • North Coast Journal • Thursday, Dec. 20, 2012 15 continued from previous page Plaza Prophecies By Andrew Goff O K. You’ve heard what the “experts” have to say about how the world will end on Dec. 21. But we wanted to go to the source of real liberated wisdom in Humboldt County, the Arcata Plaza, and see what the amateur eschatologers there envisioned for the demise of our world. We did not take “I don’t believe the world is going to end” for an answer from the Plaza posse. We demanded they dig deeper and get creative. This is what they predicted. l Low Cost 2 1 5 Evaluation Center Do it Legally Renew Your 215 From Any Doctor or Clinic For Less Walk-ins Welcome Wed & Sat 12-6pm Special discount for Seniors, SSI , Veterans & Students VE $50 New First Time MMJ Patie nts S $ 85 All Renewals Starting At A with men tion of this ad Lowest Price Evaluations in HC Medical Cannabis Consultants (across from HC Court House) (707) 407- 0527 508 I Street, Eureka 16 North Coast Journal • Thursday, Dec. 20, 2012 • northcoastjournal.com John Wesley, the founder of the Methodist Church, foresaw the second coming of Christ in 1836. The World Ends Every Day By Heidi Walters TRADITIONAL AND FUSION JAPANESE FOOD DINE IN OR TAKE OUT MONDAY-SATURDAY (707) 444-3318 2120 4TH STREET EUREKA 11:30AM-9:00PM D eep under a hill in Petrolia, in a 20-by-400-foot tube of concrete and steel, the Church of Spiritual Technology — Scientology’s archival arm — has squirreled away the words of the religious group’s founder, L.Ron Hubbard. Some are preserved in gold and enveloped in clouds of argon, an inert gas. The church has spent tens of millions on the Petrolia bunker and others elsewhere. They’re supposed to be good for 1,000 years and able to withstand nuclear blasts. But the rest of humanity likely won’t want to rely on the Scientologists’ take on things. So, here’s a question: What should we have in our bunker? What should we leave behind for the survivors to rebuild civilization? Or to amuse the aliens as they pick over our bones? What were we, and did we matter? Sounds like a question for a philosopher, so we call John Powell, in the philosophy department up at Humboldt State University. Don’t worry, he’s not pompous. Philosophers, he says, are more like the rotorooter operators. “We’re rooting out bad thinking,” he says. “We’re catching people in making mistakes.” And, so, the apocalypse bunker … ? “First of all, nothing is going to be preserved,” Powell says. “Sooner or later, the sun is going to go nova … so the idea that we’re going to preserve things forever is just ludicrous. We and everything we have done is going to go away.” Even if we wanted to shove stuff into a bunker — Powell admits he’d like to bring along his Shakespeare and Plato, for starters — it couldn’t possibly all fit. Better, Powell says, to think of the world as our bunker and take care of what’s in it now, while it lasts. Powell suspects apocalyptic thinking might be an attempt to shirk this duty. “I think it’s kind of a cop-out,” he says. “I think lots of people think the end of the world is happening because they don’t want to keep going on.” You know: The whole world’s going to hell in a handbasket — wars, environmental scares, psychopaths, sociopaths, fiscal devil’s diving boards, personal troubles — why not just end it all with a big bang-up catastrophe to end all catastrophes? Apocalyptic thinkers can get so wrapped up in the Big Event, Powell says, they neglect to live in the present, to find value in particular moments, people and tasks. “There are so many things that are worth living for,” he says. “I’ve got a couple of little kids, and they help remind me of that. I tend to live in my head, thinking about abstract ideas; they want to go out and look for owl pellets in the woods.” Contrarily, Powell says it’s possible that belief in an apocalypse allows some people to find meaning in their world. What should we leave behind for the survivors to rebuild civilization? Or to amuse the aliens as they pick over our bones? Well, then, what is it exactly that makes humans desire, crave and expect an apocalypse? One answer, for many, is that the Bible has said there will be an apocalypse — and that they’ll be sheltered from it (so the bunker question’s moot). A 2010 poll by the PEW Research Center found that 41 percent of Americans believe Jesus will return in this century. Jews and Muslims also believe an apocalypse is coming, as do some other religions. But many nontraditionally religious people get wrapped up in predictions like this Mayan thing, as well. One in 10 people in the world believes the world ends this year, according to a poll conducted for Reuters by Ipsos Global Public Affairs. Humans have been predicting apocalypses since long before Christ, says Stephen Jenkins, a professor in HSU’s religious studies department. Jenkins, who’s Buddhist and usually teaches courses on Buddhism and Hinduism, taught a special course on apocalyptic thought in 2000, called Why2k. “For a staggering amount of time, almost every generation has had groups that believed or wondered if they were the ones who were going to witness the end of the world,” Jenkins says. Why? That can’t really be answered, Jenkins says, although he has a couple of theories. One is that apocalyptic thinking is a projection of an individual’s own mortality. “Everybody faces the end of time for themselves,” he says. “So that day may arrive at any moment. And they project this on their world, on their culture.” The other possible reason for apocalyptic thinking is, as Powell also suggests, that it makes time meaningful. Jenkins tells a story about a student who took his apocalypse class. He was talking about numerology and how easy it is to debunk some of the weird mathematical calculations apocalyptic thinkers dwell on by, for instance, pointing out that the reason people think in terms of 10 is simply because they have 10 fingers. “This woman looked at me and said, ‘You mean, this could all just be going on and on and on?’” Jenkins recalls. It rattled her to think there was no cosmic plan, that time was not going anywhere.” So, whenever it comes, what will you do on the last day of your world? Maybe you’ll rise, open the shades, see the yellow light on the poplar trees, the pink-suffused clouds against the rain-washed blue sky, and say, my, what a pretty morning. No, no — don’t go wondering how you’re ever gonna fit that sunrise into your bunker. Just grab your morning brew and enjoy it. l Caffé Italia BreakFaSt•eSpreSSo lunCh•dinner•Catering M-F 9aM-10pM • Sat. 11:30-10pM • CloSed Sun. 3220 Broadway, Suite 8 • eureka (Behind Big 5 Sporting goodS) 444-2421 Wovoka, the founder of the Ghost Dance movement, predicted that a new millennium would occur in 1890. northcoastjournal.com • North Coast Journal • Thursday, Dec. 20, 2012 17 City of Fortuna PROMOTIONAL COUPON (OIL FILTERS ONLY!) GET OUT! VALUED AT UP TO $25 RECYCLE USED OIL FILTERS *NOTE: THIS IS NOT A COUPON IT’S AS EASY AS 123 YOUR OIL FILTER TO A PARTICIPATING CERTIFIED FORTUNA COLLECTION CENTER 1. TAKE • Reener Petroleum: 2435 Newburg Rd • O’Reilly Auto Parts: 736 South Fortuna Blvd WILL AWARD YOU WITH A COUPON FOR A NEW OIL FILTER, VALUED UP TO $25. 2. THEY YOUR OIL FILTER AT ONE OF THESE PARTICIPATING FORTUNA MERCHANTS 3. REDEEM • Napa Auto and Truck: 745 11th St • O’Reilly Auto Parts, 736 South Fortuna Blvd AVAILABLE TO CITY OF FORTUNA RESIDENTS ONLY THIS PROMOTION ENDS MAY 31, 2013 (OR WHILE SUPPLIES LAST) Crabber kayak at the tourney. photo by amy cirincione. Crab a la Kayak By Amy Cirincione firstname.lastname@example.org Break out the Crab Pots For newbies: For those looking to learn the sport of kayak crabbing, Mouton offers free classes through Pacific Outfitters. Class schedules are posted at the Eureka store and on the LCKA Facebook page. He also organizes several species-specific charity tournaments a year. The Trinidad Rock Fish Wars in October draw 70-100 participants and raise money for the McKinleyville State Park. Shelter Cove’s “Gimme Shelter” tournament draws more than 200. For anglers: LCKA will host five charity tournaments in 2013: April 6: Lake Mendocino “Mendo Mayhem”— Charity TBA June 1: Lake Sonoma “Sonoma Slam”— Rusty Bowl BMX track Sept. 7: Blue Lake “Blue Lake Bash”— Charity TBA Oct .12: Trinidad “Rockfish Wars 3”— Mckinleyville Skate Park Dec. 7: Trinidad “Crabbing for a Cause”— Veterans Stand Down l I t was a perfect winter day in Trinidad — blue skies, bright sun and ocean breezes. Just right for hauling crab pots around on a kayak. Yes, a kayak. While they may not be the most conventional crabbing vessels around, kayaks have a growing fan base, according to Greg Mounton, who helps coordinate the Lost Coast Kayak Anglers. The social network of more than 150 people is picking up a few new members each week, he said, joining other participants who go online to find fishing partners, trade tips and condition updates, or just brag about their latest catch. Some prefer fishing poles, but crabbing contraptions aplenty were around earlier this month when 15 enthusiasts showed up for “Crabbing for a Cause,” a kayak crabbing tournament in Trinidad Harbor to benefit North Coast Stand Down. The basic idea combines elements of surfing, fishing and kayaking. Just strap some pots onto your sea kayak, squeeze into a dry suit and power through the surf until you find a good spot to drop your pots. Spend the next few hours paddling around the bay and surfing the break, then return to haul up your pots. A few hours later you can be enjoying fresh crab for dinner, the perfect end to a perfect winter day. At the tournament, each kayak crabber had a different system, custom-fit for his style. One crabber used a dive kayak, a wooden Greenland paddle, and rings — a lightweight alternative to traditional crab pots. Another used a wide sit-ontop kayak and pots. Most wore drysuits, but some preferred wetsuits for their maneuverability. Robert Bray of Eureka, who snagged an impressive 2½ pound crab during the tournament, said his favorite crabbing spots are pinnacles of rock, under which crabs like to hide. Once at one of those spots, Bray demonstrated the careful way he drops his rings or pots off the side of his kayak, and the even more careful way he pulls them up. “My sea kayak is pretty stable,” he said, “so I just throw my legs over the side and pull up the pots between my legs.” 18 North Coast Journal • Thursday, Dec. 20, 2012 • northcoastjournal.com Hon-Ming Chen, leader of a Taiwanese cult, claimed God would come to Earth in a flying saucer in 1998. (Bray is also an avid kayak fisher. “I’ve paddled out seven miles before to get fish,” he said.) The tournament was organized by Pacific Outfitters’ staff members Mouton and Aaron Ostrom, with area businesses donating coffee, doughnuts, beer and gear, and prizes awarded for the heaviest crab and heaviest total haul. The winners took home new crab pots and crab rings, which are popular with kayak crabbers. The rings are made up of a set of concentric metal rings with a small metal cage in the middle for bait. Tournament participants listed chicken, goose and duck meat as favorite bait options, but “oily” fish heads were popular, too. Entrants paid $25 for the privilege of “crabbing for a cause,” and many donated some or all of their catch to the Vet Center, which held a crab feast fundraiser on Sunday night to raise more money for Stand Down. (In the competition, Andy Lauerman won for both heaviest crab at 3.01 pounds and heaviest limit at 25 pounds, 15 ounces.) Some of the tournament participants were seasoned veterans of the sport, while others were just learning. Mouton said, “Some folks try to turn [kayak crabbing] into an elite sport. We don’t do that. We welcome newbies.” Trinidad Harbor is a favorite crabbing spot for kayakers, but many have luck kayaking in Humboldt Bay, too. According to Mouton, “You can even catch crabs from the local docks on a good day.” Wherever you go, Ostrom said, the sport has a few basic requirements. “You need a drysuit or a wetsuit, a radio and a partner. This is a buddy sport.” He stressed, “Always check the forecast. Low or no wind is important, but conditions can change fast.” One crabber recounted being rescued by the Coast Guard recently after finding himself in choppy surf and high wind, unable to get back to the beach. “They were great about it,” he said. “They asked me if I was OK and if I caught anything.” He laughed. “I try not to call the Coast Guard more than once a year.” By the afternoon, the tournament participants were making their way back to the beach, having caught their limit. They pulled their crabs from buckets, pots and kayak hatches. As they waited for their haul to be weighed and ranked, they drank beer and coffee, squinting into the afternoon sun. Not a bad way to spend a perfect winter day. l If you would like to write a Get Out! Column, please email Journal Editor Carrie Peyton Dahlberg at email@example.com dvd The end of the world isn’t all zombie plagues and alien invasions (although sometimes it’s both — see Night of the Comets). We’ll skip the disaster-porn of Roland Emmerich’s 2012. Instead, the following list rounds up some lesser-known cinema to aid in mustering up appropriate dread for our impending doom. In the pre-apocalypse genre, Abel Ferrara’s 4:44 Last Day on Earth takes a spiritual approach to the end, with a bohemian couple spending their last hours together in anticipation of environmental disaster. Similar, but less cutesy than Seeking a Friend for the End of the World, the Canadian drama Last Night (1998) features various Toronto denizens in their final hours. In the cataclysmic-pandemic genre, the 1995 miniseries of Stephen King’s The Stand is an underrated gem recommended as distraction between episodes of The Walking Dead. In Michael Haneke’s subtle Time of the Wolf (2003), a family flees the city for their country home when a livestock disease contaminates most of the water in France. Perhaps we will literally lose our senses at the end. In 2011’s Perfect Sense, Ewan McGregor and Eva Green fall in love amidst a pandemic that causes them to lose each of their five senses. The eerie arthouse classic La Jetée (1962) by the late Chris Marker was the inspiration for Terry Gilliam’s 12 Monkeys, both sending a prisoner back in time to try to stop a worldwide catastrophe. Quintet (1979) is Robert Altman’s surprisingly obscure thriller set during a new ice age in which Paul Newman finds himself part of an elaborate “survival of the fittest” game. Sometimes the world just goes sterile as in 2006’s Children of Men or the 1990 adaptation of The Handmaid’s Tale. In the wonderfully deranged future of Zardoz (1984), it is men who are sterile, except for Sean Connery, a scantily clad “Brutal” who kills God and invades a community of bored immortals. For a mystical take on the end, Australian director Peter Weir’s The Last Wave (1977) is an overlooked thriller in which a lawyer representing a group of Aborigines experiences visions of an impending cataclysm. David Duchovny and Mimi Rogers are swingers who become born-again Christians preparing for Armageddon in 1991’s provocative The Rapture. This year’s Take Shelter has Michael Shannon obsessively building a storm shelter following visions of a coming apocalypse, alienating his friends and family on a hunch. Finally, there is 1984’s Night of the Comet. When a passing comet turns most of the human race into zombies, two valley girls go on a mall-shopping spree set to the tune of “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.” Sure, why not? — Aimee Hennessy Aimee Hennessey is co-owner of La Dolce Video in Arcata. The End of the World on DVD Holiday Sale Men’s and Women’s Coats, Jackets & Pants Monday - Saturday 9:30-7:30 • Sun. 11-6 Christmas Eve 9:30-5 Extended Hours: Visit our three stores for all your holiday gifting! Main Location • Warehouse • Surplus SURPLUS 6th & E Streets Eureka • 444-9201 Chen also claimed God looked like him, and that on March 25 God would appear on Channel 18 on everyWar TV set in theterminate U.S. • Thursday, Dec. 20, 2012 northcoastjournal.com • North Coast Journalnorthcoastjournal.com Proto-Jehovah’s Witnesses predicted World I would in Armageddon. • North Coas 19 MckinleyvilLe aRts Night Night MckinleyvilLe aRts SCULPTURE BY CONNIE BUTLER AT CHURCH OF THE JOYFUL HEALER MckinleyvilLe aR a 1. EUREKA-ARCATA AIRPORT Artwork by Humboldt County artists, coordinated by the Redwood Art Association and sponsored by the Headwaters Fund. 2. SILVER LINING at the EurekaArcata Airport, 3561 Boeing Ave., #D. Sandra Vanderpoel: acrylic and oil paintings on canvas and sawblades, wildlife drawings in colored pencil by Loraine Heck, beaded jewelry by Karen Comstock, acoustic music by Joe Garceau from 7-9 p.m. Third Friday McKinleyville Arts Night, Dec. 21, 6-8 p.m. is presented by members of the McKinleyville business community and is open for all McKinleyville businesses to display the work of local artists. Receptions for artists, exhibits and/or performances are from 6-8 p.m. on the third Friday of each month. Call (707) 834-6460 or visit www. mckinleyvilleartsnight.com for more information. Corner of 14th & G Streets. Near Wildberries and only two blocks from HSU. Tuesday - Sunday 11:30am to 8:45pm Closed Monday 822-2227 Bayfront Restaurant Relax and Celebrate the Holidays! Bottles of Wine and Sake are 1/2 off on Wednesdays Open Daily 11am to 9:30pm One F Street, Eureka CA 443-7489 20 NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 20, 2012 • northcoastjournal.com People’s Temple founder Jim Jones claimed he had visions of a nuclear holocaust that would take place in 1967. northcoastjournal.com City Center Rd McKinleyville Shopping Center To 1 2 Gwin Rd 3 Nursery Way 3. STORK’S NEST, McKinleyville Shopping Center. Visit with Santa and Mrs. Claus! Bring a camera for a photo of your child. Display of work by local children who entered the Holiday Coloring Contest hosted by the McKinleyville Shopping Center and the Stork’s Nest. For more information about the coloring contest or Santa, call 840-0300. 4. BLAKE’S BOOKS, 2005 Central Ave. Paintings by Jim Welsh. 5. CHURCH OF THE JOYFUL HEALER, 1944 Central Ave. Original angel sculptures and paintings, Live music by the Bell Choir of the Redwoods and Celtic harpist Howdy Emerson. 6. KNITTER’S LANE, 1225 Central Ave., #14. Knit Night — join the knitter’s circle. Food, fun and knitting until 10 p.m. ● Hiller Rd 4 McKINLEYVILLE DECEMBER 2012 Holly Dr Heartwood Dr Heartwood Dr Celebrate the Holidays! Our banquet room accommodates up to 50 guests. From the owners of Masaki’s Kyoto Coming Soon to Arcata Open Christmas Eve and New Year’s Eve Closed Christmas Day and New Year’s Day 316 E ST. • OLD TOWN, EUREKA • 443-7187 DINNER MON-SAT 5-9 • LUNCH TUE-FRI 11-2 5 Central Ave Miller Farms Sutter Rd To 6 School Rd 0 500 ft © NORTH COAST JOURNAL/Miles Eggelston Nursery Way - NOW OPEN in Henderson Center Open 7 days New Thai - Serving Breakfast Lunch Espresso Drinks Local Beers & Wine A 2 nd Cafe Nooner 307 2nd St. Old T own Eureka 269-0555 Custome r Fa Firecrac vorite: ker Beer & Sake on 18th St., between G & H, Northtown Arcata 826-1988 Open Daily • 7am - 4pm 2910 E Street, Eureka • 407-3664 www.cafenooner.net The book The Jupiter Effect claimed combined gravitational forces of aligned planets would destroy the earth on March 10, 1982. northcoastjournal.com • NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 20, 2012 21 SPECIAL ADVERTISING SUPPLEMENT Los Bagels has an array of unique and delicious gift ideas this holiday season. From our handmade journals straight from Araceli Huerta in Oaxaca, Mexico, to our Holiday Breads, Gift Cards, and our new Slug Slime 4-packs, we have something for everyone on your list. Los Bagels, 1061 I St., Arcata, 822-3150 and 403 2nd St., Eureka 442-8525. 2 0 1 2 Great Western Clothing Co. and Hustle on over to t s a l e h t this is ide Gift Gu ! 2 1 0 2 f o Before you run off to that special holiday party event make sure to drop by Pure Makeup Boutique. Professional makeup artist Maria Brandon is ready to assist and recommend the perfect color and products for your skin type. Gift certiﬁcates for makeup and training consultations available. 609 E St. Eureka. 442-9200. www.puremakeupstore.com. ﬁnd that special gift for your favorite buckaroo or buckarette. When the weather gets frightful and you’re huddled ‘round that ﬁre surprise your sweetie with boots, belts, bangles, blankets…. Like us on Facebook and ﬁnd everything western at Great Western Clothing Co. 4465 Broadway, Eureka, 443-9388. The Rocking Horse is your natural choice for children’s clothing and toys this holiday season. Featuring Smart Gear Balance Bikes, which are designed to develop a child’s balance and coordination while boosting their conﬁdence for the step-up to a pedal bike. Located on the Arcata Plaza in the Historic Jacoby’s Storehouse. 822-3509 Last minute shoppers don’t despair! Eureka Natural Foods has these great gift cards redeemable for either groceries or gifts from their Global Goods Department. 1450 Broadway, Eureka. Open 7 days a week. 442-6325. www.eurekanaturalfoods.com Arcata Artisans Cooperative features locally made ﬁne arts and crafts of the highest quality. Visit our gallery to ﬁnd the perfect, unique and affordable gift. We are on the Arcata Plaza at 883 H St. Our holiday hours are Monday through Saturday, 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. (Fridays until 8 p.m.) and Sundays noon to 4 p.m. Give the gift of art this holiday! The 22 NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 13, 2012 • northcoastjournal.com The Art Center Frame Shop Hunting for an artsy cat, bird or frame? has delightful gifts including these for everyone. Happy holidays from all of us at the Art Center Frame Shop! We’re in Old Town at 616 Second St., Eureka. 443-7017. 2 0 1 2 SPECIAL ADVERTISING SUPPLEMENT Humboldt Traders asks you to taste the difference. This holiday season try the Humboldt Hemp Wick, an alternative organic butane-free way to enjoy Humboldt’s ﬁnest. Available locally at your favorite smoke shop. 845-2015. Humboldtwick.com Find gifts for knitters and non-knitters alike at Yarn! Needle and notions cases from Chicken Boots, Chiao Goo interchangeable needle sets, and gift certiﬁcates for knitters. Locally made hats, scarves, neck warmers, purses, chocolate and jewelry for everyone! 418 2nd St. Old Town, Eureka. 443-YARN. Photo by Amy Kumler Photography. Carter House Inns & Restaurant 301 is offering 20% off on all gift certiﬁcates through Dec. 25, 2012. Dine at the Wine Spectator Grand Award winning Restaurant 301 or purchase a special wine or celebratory Champagne from the 301 Wine Shop; or just escape to a fun overnight in a luxurious room. 301 L Street in Old Town Eureka. 444-8062. www.carterhouse.com 2 0 1 2 20% Of f Listen to sports on TV without bothering your more intelligent wife who is reading in the same room. Sound Advice recommends Sennheiser’s RS-120 Wireless headphones on sale for $149. Sennheiser headphones are legendary for audio quality and features a 2 year warranty. Sound Advice, 5th and D in downtown Eureka. 442-4462. Simply Macintosh now offers a $50 gift card with every new iMac, MacBook Pro and MacBook Air purchase with Applecare. We also carry the new iPad, iPad mini and latest iPods and all the accessories to go with them. On the Arcata Plaza at 837 H St. 825-7100. www.simplymacintosh.com Global Village Gallery has one-of-a-kind gifts from around the world. Tribal jewelry, visionary art, handcrafted statues of stone and wood of your favorite deities, textiles, pillows and blankets of alpaca, wool and cotton. Clothing for men, women and children of natural ﬁbers and organic cotton, supporting fair trade and small cooperatives. Located at 973 H St. in Arcata. Open 7 days a week. 826-2323. North Coast Journal, but You could shout it from the rooftops that you love the sporting a Journal T-shirt is a bit safer. We have women’s ﬁt and unisex shirts, ones with just the Journal logo and ones with the Best of Humboldt 2012 winners on the back. Come to our ofﬁce at 310 F St., Eureka to buy a T-shirt or coozie. Special deals on our Best of Humboldt shirts while supplies last. 442-1400. www.northcoastjournal.com continued on next page northcoastjournal.com • NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 13, 2012 23 continued from previous page SPECIAL ADVERTISING SUPPLEMENT 2 0 1 2 Spa at Personal Choice. Try Peace on Earth begins at the Alirose is your place to shop for your favorite men’s and women’s designers, jewelry, accessories, fragrances and more. New arrivals and special deals through the holidays! Gift certiﬁcates and free gift wrapping available. Like us on Facebook for new arrivals and special promotions. Located in Old Town Eureka, 228 F St., 445-2727. www.aliroseboutique.com the Vichy Shower or Hydrotherapy Tub and relax with one of our signature spa experiences. Gift certiﬁcates available for individual spa treatments or join our spa club and get one free service with 6 month membership, two free services with yearly plan. Purchase 6 or 12 month spa club by Dec. 31 for an additional free Hydrotherapy Tub treatment. Located at 130 G St., Old Town Eureka. 445-2041. www.spaatpersonalchoice.com Wildberries Marketplace Our extensive cosmetic section, with a knowledgeable staff, includes Dr. Hauschka’s holistic skin care products, great for gift giving. We offer a large selection of unique, local, organic, earth-friendly gift ideas. Wildberries, your supermarket of choice, emphasizes healthful products while offering you a complete selection of conventional groceries. Top of the hill, G St., Arcata, 822-0095. 2 0 1 2 A dazzling rainbow of Austrian crystals catch the light from Fireﬂy jewelry necklaces, bracelets and earrings, crafted by Guatemalan artisans and available at Ferndale Abraxas Jewelry. Gift certiﬁcates and other elegant jewelry, hats, & clothing accessories available. Come visit our treasure trove in the Victorian Village of Ferndale. 505 Main Street. 786-4288. Hand stitched leather detailing brings distinction to this classic Mary Jane in ﬂashy patent black cherry. Built on Dansko’s famously comfortable stapled clog base for all day support. Come to North Soles Footwear and check them out. On the Plaza Arcata, 407 Second St. in Old Town Eureka and on Laurel St. in Fort Bragg. Our gift certiﬁcates are always a perfect ﬁt. Throw THE party of the year with a Frozen Concoction Maker by Margaritaville! Margaritas, Daiquiris, coladas, the options are endless and with four models to choose from, including a battery powered portable unit, The Kitchen Store has your party covered no matter where you party. Two convenient locations. 452 Main Street Ferndale and inside McKinleyville Home & Garden Center. www.mykitchenstores.co How about a gift coin for Christmas? Far North Climbing Gym. Yearly Give the gift of adventure, health, ﬁtness and fun with a gift certiﬁcate to The Blacksmith Shop & Gallery is located on Main Street in the Victorian Village of Ferndale. 786-4216. ferndaleblacksmith.com. PayPal friendly. or monthly memberships for kids, teens and adults make for an excellent afterschool activity, daily ﬁtness program or weekend adventure. We also offer private lessons and host birthdays, special events and camps. Located on the corner of 10th & K Sts., Arcata. 826.9558. Visit farnorthclimbing.com or NorthCoastAdventuresCenters.com. 24 NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 13, 2012 • northcoastjournal.com Scrapper’s Edge and we’ll help organize hours of indoor play time for when the winter rains return. Seasons Greetings from our staff to you and yours! Scrapper’s Edge, 728 4th Street Eureka, 445-9686. www.scrappersedge.net Give original 100% local, handmade functional works of art from Humboldt Hardware to your loved ones this holiday season. Right now ﬁnd ornaments, carvings, boxes, wine stoppers, cutting boards, wood pens, frames, mirrors, bowls, jewelry, furniture and more. Over 75% of the materials woodworkers bring to Humboldt Hardware are reclaimed. New location on the corner of the Vance at 531 2nd St. in Old Town, Eureka. 444-2717. www.facebook.com/HumboldtHardware. When the weather outside is frightful, entertain your favorite children with crafts and games. Stop by SPECIAL ADVERTISING SUPPLEMENT 2 0 1 2 Inspire her with the perfect gift from Plaza this holiday, like a gorgeous and coveted leather bag from Hobo. She will love the innovative design, purposeful details and iconic look year-round… because quality and cool never go out of style. Plaza, 808 G St., Arcata. 822-2250. Adventure’s Edge stocks kids Hotrock bikes in every size (12 in., 16 in., 20 in. & 24 in.) as well as pedal-less toddler Hotwalks. Our full service bike shop will make sure to help you select the right ﬁt and make sure you don’t leave without the helmet. One block north of the Plaza at 10th & F St. 822-4673. Celebrating 42 years! www.adventuresedge.com 2 0 1 2 Add a touch of elegance to your décor. Candle Holders by Cypress HomeTM are in stock just in time for the holidays. The Miller Farms gift shop is blooming with treasures for everyone on your shopping list. Wishing you wonderful memories this Holiday Season. Miller Farms 1828 Central Ave., McKinleyville. 839-1571 ext. 5. www.millerfarmsnursery.com Start a collection of Schleich’s farm life inspired animal toys from A & L Feed and Pet Supply. You’ll also ﬁnd farm animal print t-shirts from Humboldt’s Almond Blossom Arts and Crafts, Muck boots for staying dry, or even fair-trade Alpaca wool hats and gloves from Nepal. Under new ownership at 2308 Central Ave in McKinleyville. 839-3265. humcoaandlfeed.com. Orange Cup Coral invites you to gift our services to someone special you care about. A certiﬁcate attractively packaged in one hundred, ﬁfty or twenty-ﬁve dollar denominations can be used toward our nail, lash & brow or hair services. 612 Second Street, Old Town Eureka near G Street. 499.2638 Give yourself or a loved one the gift of health and conﬁdence by signing up for classes at North Coast Self Defense Academy. Gain valuable knowledge in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, Muay Thai, Kung fu, Tai Chi, and Filipino Kali. Youth/Adult Classes available! Your ﬁrst class is free! Visit www.northcoastselfdefense.com, or contact us at 822-6278 or firstname.lastname@example.org. Happy Holidays from NCSDA! continued on next page northcoastjournal.com • NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 13, 2012 C SS LA MEMBER 25 continued from previous page SPECIAL ADVERTISING SUPPLEMENT 2 0 1 2 Paciﬁc Motorsports is your Humboldt County headquarters for radiocontrolled vehicles, parts and accessories. We have a big selection of cars and trucks in stock that are ready to put a smile on the face of your kids or the kid in you! Come check out our new indoor off-road track, open during regular business hours! Located at 4001 Broadway, Eureka. 443-8031. www.paciﬁcmotorsports.biz La Vie Parisienne Jewelry originated in old Parisian workshops established over 200 years ago. The elegant designs are rendered from original French molds and stampings. We carry a large selection of earrings, necklaces and bracelets. We will even wrap your gift for free! Open 7 days a week through Christmas. Carl Johnson Co. 3950 Jacobs Ave., (one mile north of Eureka off HWY 101). 443-4851. www.carljohnsonco.com 2 0 1 2 Give the gift of experience! Recreation gift cards are the perfect gift for all ages and occasions, good for any of our activities. Available in $25, $50 and $100 increments. Arcata Recreation offers something for everyone from Zumba to gymnastics, canopy tours and more. City of Arcata Recreation Division, 736 F St., Arcata. 822-7091. www.cityofarcata.org/rec Ferndale Music Company features sweet used and vintage guitars like this Mustang and Jaguar. The store has quality North American-made instruments for all levels of musicians, including ukes, mandolins, banjos, high-end PA gear from QSC, drums and accessories. Gift certiﬁcates and lessons available. 580 Main St. #2. Ferndale. 786-7030. www.ferndalemusiccompany.com Find your favorite Humboldt artists at Sewell Gallery Fine Art. We offer an exciting array of artistic gifts starting at $25. Original artwork in glass, silk, ceramic and print compliment the ﬁnest in painting, sculpture and photography, all from local artists. Holiday hours 10-7 Tues-Sat., Sun. 10-5. Find us at 423 F Street, Eureka, 269-0617 or sewellgallery.com. Stop Staring! The perfect mix between sexy and beautiful classy dresses. Scarves from warm to elegant, cashmere tights, washable velvets, sweaters and jeans perfect for parties or everyday wear. Hats, purses, novelty socks and Spanx! Belle Starr, 405 2nd St., Old Town Eureka, 441-1296 and on the Plaza at 863 H St., Arcata. 822-1295. A wonderful gift idea for anyone. Benbow Historic Inn & Resort is offering 20% off north coast thursday sept. 20, 2012 vol XXIII issue 38 • humboldt county, calif. FREE gift certiﬁcates - in any amount. For example, purchase a $100 gift certiﬁcate for only $80 or $500 for only $400. Open all year. Good for holidays, future getaways, special occasions, birthdays and anniversaries. 445 Lake Benbow Drive, Garberville, CA 1-800-355-3301. www.benbowinn.com north coast north coast thursday sept. 6, 2012 vol XXIII FREE issue 36 • humboldt county, calif. a party? 8 Ooh, ooh, it’s hard gumint stuff and my brain hurts 40 Jazz season gets bopping 43 Imposte r, Robot save what’ s left of summer mailbox 5 Exploding 9 Code of oldt silence in Humb courts 25 Is y coming up there a holida or anything? 28 Teddy bear with a Glock 29 What a king! 6 Incorporate! 8 Souping it up 23 Rubber duckies at sea 24 Shunning Chekhov 26 Pretty Lights in Blue Lake 35 Lousy movie, dimwit message 26 NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 13, 2012 • northcoastjournal.com northcoastjournal.com 7 Guess who’s having winning North Coast Journal of Politics, People and Art. But, isn’t the North Coast Journal free? Good question. Yes, and will remain so for the person who receives your gift! Act now to ensure they get the Top Ten Stories of the year special annual edition. $39 subscription/52 issues. 310 F St., Eureka. 442-1400. www.northcoastjournal.com Help keep the U.S. Postal Service in business, while giving someone you love this year a paid subscription to the award- erti Gift C to : from: cate Holiday gift certiﬁcates are available at our holistic spa. We offer romantic couples massages, hot stone, deep tissue, reiki, southwest desert mineral scrubs, ﬂotation pool sessions, overnight accommodations and more. Chumayo Spa. 668-0101. www.chumayo.com SPECIAL ADVERTISING SUPPLEMENT 2 0 1 2 Give your special Tweety a gift this holiday season from Strictly For The Birds. With a wide selection of feeders, houses and accessories, you’ll also ﬁnd fun bird-related items such as sun-catchers, wind chimes, and socks. Don’t forget your feathered friends and the folks who love them this Christmas. 123 F St, across from the Gazebo in Old Town, Eureka, 445-1822. One of the last of a vanishing breed, Northtown Books is an independent bookstore right off the plaza in Arcata, featuring a wide variety of books, periodicals and calendars. Special orders are welcome and usually arrive within a day or two (and there’s no shipping fee). Gift certiﬁcates available. Always open until 9 p.m. on Friday. 957 H St., Arcata. 822-2834. www.northtownbooks.com Fly in before this clever raven absconds with all of our bright shiny things! We have earrings, bracelets and necklaces that are bold, lovely, innovative and dainty. Expect the unexpected at The Garden Gate. Gifts for your home, your garden, and your loved ones. 905 H St, on The Arcata Plaza. 822-2156. 2 0 1 2 Fabric Temptations’ unique and charming shop To: ____________ From: __________ Voted best alehouse/pub and beer store in Northern California by Northwest Brewers News with 26 taps and the best specialty beer selection for hundreds of miles your beer loving friends will certainly ﬁnd what they’re looking for. Don’t trouble yourself with trying to pick out the right beer, let them do it themselves with The Local Gift Certiﬁcate. The Local Beer Bar, 517 F St. Eureka (707) 497-6320, email@example.com offers beautiful textiles, cotton, fabulous batiks, yarns, gifts, sewing and knitting accessories and classes. As one of the ﬁnest fabric and yarn shops in the country we carry organic cotton, hemp, wool, FOLKWEAR patterns, trims, ﬂannel, linen, silks, and velvets. Visit us just off the Plaza at 942 “G” St., Arcata. 822-7782. Going Places is offering the Eagle Creek Adventure Collection at 20% off through December. Lightweight, with innovative features, extreme durability and proven travel performance in two- and fourwheel designs. Built tough for any traveler and every journey. Find the collection at 328 2nd St., Old Town Eureka. 443-4145. www.goingplaces.com Here at The Beneﬁcial Living Center, we feel nothing beneﬁts living more than staying alive. Considering that the end is nigh, emergency gear is both a practical and thoughtful gift. Show that you care with a hand-crank powered ﬂashlight/cell phone charger ($15) or emergency radio ($35). Remember, the apocalyptic zombies can sense unpreparedness. Happy 2013!!! The Beneﬁcial Living Center, 148 South G St. in Arcata. 633-6125. www.beneﬁciallivingcenter.com continued on next page northcoastjournal.com • NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 13, 2012 27 continued from previous page SPECIAL ADVERTISING SUPPLEMENT 2 0 1 2 Stressless Charity of Choice. Receive $200 off a Stressless recliner when you donate $50 to a charity of your choice. See your sales associate for complete details. Living Styles Furniture and Mattress Showroom, 2nd and A, Facing The Bay. 443-3161. www.livingstyles.net We sell more than just great groceries at the North Coast Co-op. Find cookware, apparel, calendars, cards, candles, games, toys and eco-friendly items. Throw in a cooking class gift certiﬁcate or a reloadable gift card and you’re set! 8th & I, Arcata. 4th & B, Eureka. www.northcoastco-op.com Give the gift of beautiful skin this holiday season! A memorable way to celebrate any occasion or holiday, Soul to Soul Spa & Foot Bar gift certiﬁcates allow you to deliver the perfect gift. Gift Certiﬁcates are available for any spa service and package, or dollar amount. Available in store and online. We also offer beautiful customized gift baskets with an assortment of products and gift items from our spa boutique. On behalf of the entire staff at Soul to Soul Spa & Foot Bar, we look forward to treating you soon. 854 10th Street, Arcata. 707.822.SOUL (7685). soultosoulspa.com Stop by the American Indian Art & Gift Shop and ﬁnd beautiful and unique hand crafted items including silver jewelry, pottery, baskets and much more. We feature several local and world-renowned artists. Courtesy gift-wrap is available and December purchases are tax free! The American Indian Art & Gift Shop, 241 F St. in Old Town, Eureka, 445-8451. shop.americanindianonline.com 2 0 1 2 The Alegria Paloma and Kaitlin both feature a mild rocker outsole designed to promote perfect posture, reducing stress on muscles, joints and back. Pick a style that ﬁts your mood, comfort is assured. Try them on at Abraxas Shoes and Leather in Victorian Village of Ferndale. 430 Main St. Gift certiﬁcates available. 786-4277. The Mad River Brewing Tasting Room has everyone’s favorite beers on tap and by the case! For under $30 you can pick up pint glasses, t-shirts, sweatshirts, hats and other beer related merchandise. Gift certiﬁcates are also available in any dollar amount and can be used on all items! Mad River Brewing, 101 Taylor Way, Blue Lake. 668-4151 ext. 106. www.madriverbrewing.com What makes this place so great? It’s not just the natural beauty of the cool coast or sunny inland areas... Shopping locally... It’s the people who live and work here. Please support the local economy by purchasing from locally based businesses. - sends 3 times more money back into our local economy than shopping at chain stores. - builds community — you’ll probably run into someone you know or make friends with your favorite shopkeeper. - gives the community its one-of-a-kind personality by keeping unique businesses aﬂoat. - puts less stress on our roads and other public utilities, thereby keeping taxes lower. - makes “green” sense — local stores are closer to the consumer, creating less trafﬁc and pollution. 28 NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 13, 2012 • northcoastjournal.com home & garden • Fencing • Furniture • Plumbing • Flooring • Carpeting • Lighting • Gardening • Stoves • Insurance • Moving & Storage • Farm Supplies • Heating • Roofing • Landscaping service directory THE NORTH COAST JOURNAL ASSUMES NO LIABILITY FOR SERVICES ADVERTISED. YOU MAY WANT TO VERIFY CONTRACTOR LICENSE NUMBERS AND PROOF OF INSURANCE FROM THE VENDOR OF YOUR CHOICE. • Greenhouses • Windows • Construction • Countertops • Lumber • Water Systems • Septic Service WE’RE THE SOLUTION! Agricultural Fencing RTV900 Rugged & Reliable • • • • Animal Containment Crop Protection Deﬁnes Borders Many Styles alterations & custom sewing 407-3527 | M-F 11-6 ✂ Sat 11-2 | 621 3rd Street, old town Eureka (707) 826-8400 5065 Boyd Rd. • Arcata Monday - Friday 8am - 5pm 5660 WEST END RD., ARCATA LICENSED-BONDED • CA CONTRACTOR #808339 RUSS@HUMBOLDTFENCE.COM Just a Friendly Reminder, It’s Time to Prune Your Fruit Trees $ time callers 0 Off 5 for ﬁrst We give FREE estimates! QUALIFIED ARBORIST Call (707)725-2609 Depot Humboldt (707) 825 0269 www.humdepot.com Mon-Sat 10am-8pm Sun 10am-6:30pm 5201 Carlson Park Drive #2, Arcata GPS Address: 1264 Giuntoli Ln. (Behind McIntosh Farm Country Store) Garden Center Heavy Looking for the North Coast’s best resource on all things GREEN? Be sure to pick up the Journal’s Do It Green Guide. www.humboldtpetsupply.com 145 South G St. Suite C, Arcata Hwy 101 in the Safety Corridor 707.826.7435 10-6pm M-Sat • Sun 10-5pm humboldt county’s comprehensive guide to green building, green living and more 2011 Fire #1 bloom enhancer Available on newsstands all over Humboldt County, at your favorite green merchants and online 24/7 at www.northcoastjournal.com, under the Special Publications tab. free $ 5 OFF For sales of $25 or more 633-6216 northcoastjournal.com • NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 20, 2012 29 ADVANCE T1CKElS Electronic Buy-In (10 Packs) $100 Paper Buy-In (2 Packs) $50 AT THE DOOR Electronic Buy-In (10 Packs) $125 Paper Buy-In Packs) $75 THROWBACK THURSDAY DJ NIGHTS!!! CHECK OUT THE NEW SCENE IN THE FIREWATER LOUNGE ON THURSDAYS!!! WE HAVE ACCURATE PRODUCTIONS TAKING IT TO OLD SCHOOL LEVELS. GRAB YOUR FRIENDS & ENJOY SOME GREAT BEATS!!! TABLE BONUSES DECEMBER 21 & 28 AT 10 PM WE ARE GIVING 2 LUCKY TABLE GAMES PLAYERS THE GEAR TO PARTY IT UP THIS HOLIDAY SEASON; WE WANT TO DECORATE YOUR HOME WITH A NEW HDTV AND KEGERATOR. BINGO BONUSES GO, GO, GO ... BINGO 7 DAYS A WEEK! FRIDAYS IN DECEMBER ENJOY HOLIDAY HOT SEATS; BINGO LIKE THERE'S NO TOMORROW ON THE 21ST; AND DON'T MISS OUR MASSIVE NEW YEARS EVE BINGO MARATHON!! OVER $45,000 IN CASH PRIZES. 30 North Coast Journal • Thursday, Dec. 20, 2012 • northcoastjournal.com A UFO cult leader predicted world destruction on Dec. 21, 1954. The book When Prophecy Fails was based on the cult’s falling out. The End (or Whatever) Parties for the end of time T By Bob Doran firstname.lastname@example.org wait, R.E.M. for zombies? “Zombies like those jamz too,” says Gabe. It’s the End of the World as We Know It is what they’re calling the party at Six Rivers Friday night with Bandon from The Works, aka DJ Zephyr, providing the soundtrack. His last? He said it was a difficult choice, “but I’ll go with ‘The Game’ by Queen, a song about letting oneself love another. It’s magical.” Matt Jackson of Missing Link Records selected a sweet love song from the ‘60s, “The Way I Feel Inside” by The Zombies. “Why? I’m not really sure, the answer just popped out right when I read the question.” Matt ‘n Adam are hosts of The Last Soul Night on Earth Friday at Humboldt Brews, joined by the usual suspects, Mantease, Jaymorg and King Maxwell, spinning vinyl to celebrate “either the end of the universe as we know it or the Mayan equivalent of Y2K.” World Famous Productions presents Mayan Apocalypse 12-21-12 Friday at the Arcata Theatre Lounge, a night of top shelf EDM featuring Portland’s Danny Corn, Comma, Grenier (aka DJ G) and Hypha. All are invited to “come celebrate the end of the world/cosmic realignment/ polar shift/fifth dimensional awakening/ time wave zero/Mayan calendar end/ peak novelty, or nothing at all — let’s rage anyway!” In Human Creation’s Holiday Bizarre III: End Game is a music/dance/comedy review Friday at the Jambalaya, “celebrat- he end of the world Friday? I doubt it, but who knows? Maybe those ancient Mayans knew something we don’t. Or maybe they simply created a calendar that tracked the passing of time, the changing seasons. Friday is also the solstice: We officially shift from autumn to winter, a traditional time to gather together to mark transition. How do we respond to a turning point? We throw a party. We beat drums, maybe blow a horn, strum a guitar, drop a needle in the groove, point a cursor at some special digital track, make the music flow. Friday may not be our last day on Earth, but it’s as good a day as any to have a party. Suppose the apocalypse was pending. What’s the last song you’d play before you go? We posed the question to a few music makers as we researched various end-o parties planned for the weekend. Gabe Pressure, half of the Pressure Anya DJ duo, quickly chose R.E.M.’s ‘80s classic “It’s the End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine),” an obvious selection since it incorporates everything from earthquakes and extreme weather to the Rapture and dreams of knives. Gabe and “Zombie Slayer” Anya are spinning for a Zombie Apocalypse World End Party Friday night at Nocturnum, with special guests Itchie Fingaz and VJ CJ (visuals) plus a zombie slayer dance by Gypsy Bella from Bella Vita Fire Dance Company. But ing the end times.” The fundraiser for the development of the Creamery Art District and Redwood Raks features dancing by Ya Habibi, Megz Madrone, Marjhani, High Freakuency and Lex, music by Drifter Killer and Tellum and comedy by John McClurg and Don Husman (the man behind In Human Creation) along with reindeer games including an ugliest sweater contest and a raffle for cool prizes. “If this is truly the end, let’s make the most of it,” says Don. Marcia Mendels from NightHawk chose “Something to Talk About” (“What better time to break the rules?”), “Don’t Dream It’s Over” and “Never Can Say Goodbye” adding, “or maybe we should just start a worldwide OM and see if we can vibrate ourselves into the next whatever!” NightHawk is playing a benefit for the Emma Center Friday at the Arcata Playhouse titled Changing Tomorrow: A Party to Celebrate A New Start to a New Calendar of Joy and Peace, “your opportunity to change tomorrow for a lot of deserving folks while you’re having a great time rockin’ out.” Also on the bill: Nebulawn Mower. Saint John and the Sinners play at Bear River Casino Friday night. Saint’s dark jam for the end is “The End” by The Doors. Does that perhaps signal a Doors tribute in addition to the Fleetwood Mac and Cream tributes the band does now? Musicians For Community celebrate the end of the world and the winter solstice on Friday at the newly remodeled Logger Bar with a community dinner and music by Seed, The Movers and the Shakers “and more!” “‘If You’re Happy and You Know It,’ that’s my vote,” says Joe Whiskey-Whiskers Deschaine of BA-DUM-CHH Comedy. The funny folk’s Last Comedy Show Ever is at the Pearl Lounge Thursday, a day before the end, where you can “greet the Mayan prophecy with laughter.” EDM artist Wrye declares, “The world ends at midnight” on Thursday (when 1221-12 begins). He invites you to “celebrate the beginning of a new age of disco darkness” at Siren’s Song with his dark music, along with Dat-1, Onhell, Estkowski and 2012, a party that also celebrates Wrye’s new 12-inch This Is Grindhouse. Installation artist Peter Santino‘s apocalyptic takeover of the Morris Graves Museum of Art, Exhibition at the End Of Time, at the End of the World, has its official Opening at the End on Friday with conceptual ruminations on truth, beauty, art and the end. Humboldt expat Berel Alexander is back from Oakland for the holidays. He’s doing two shows with his ensemble (and Vidagua): Friday at the Garberville Theater, Saturday at the Arcata Playhouse — celebrating the solstice, not the end — but he still responded to my question. “The last song I’d play would be Louis Armstrong’s ‘What A Wonderful World,’ then I’d play my song, ‘So Good to Be Alive,’ ‘cause I believe that the end is rather the new beginning of the world as we know it!” SoHum blues rock band Crossroads opens the Garberville show, which happens to be the same night as the town’s annual Lighted Parade (along the lines of the other ones but SoHum style). Saturday’s Playhouse show pairs Berel and co. with Kombucha Brothers, a new local combo with guitarists/songwriters Ilan Navah and Matt Starry playing “sweet folk and blues originals” backed by rhythm section Joe Hunt and Ryan Woempner. There are no visible end-of-time ties, but Humboldt’s wandering spectre Carpathian offers Winter Stories Around the Christmas Fire Friday evening at Old Town Coffee and Chocolates. He’s joined by Paul Woodland, April Parrott and Howard Emerson telling spooky ghost stories with holiday themes. Moving into the post-apocalypse, Spirit Vibrations presents its Second Annual Holiday Jam Saturday night at the Jambalaya with performances by The 51 Cards, The Plumb Uglies, Chris Parreira, Josephine Johnson, Jan Bramlett, Jenifer Breeze, Dan Seidel (from the S.F. band Kitchen Fire), Norm Crawford, Eddy Arnold Jr. and Burning Sage “and more.” Choose your holiday. There’s no party to celebrate, but Friday is roll-out day for the ambitious Humboldt Music Project 2012 double CD, a snapshot of the local scene assembled by Elle J of Humboldt Fire to support youth scholarships for HSU’s Humboldt Music Academy. The album is dedicated to the late Bryan Osper — the opening track is one of Bryan’s songs. The double CD includes dozens of local musicians in many genres including SquarPeg (playing “stranger chamber” music Saturday at Libation), Seabury Gould and Evan Morden (playing Thursday at Gallagher’s), Josephine Johnson, Berel Alexander and Vidagua (see above), UKEsperience, Bon Swing, Calleaghn Kinnamon, JD Jeffries, Joanne Rand, Mike Lee, Eric and Maia, Musaic, The Nucleus, Strix Vega, Asha Nan, SambAmore, Madi Simmons, WyldCat, Collective Elements, Magic Heart Genies, AC the Coolest, Schedule 1, Hiway, Thoughtography, Area Sound, Hella Richtor, M Shah, Chase Larue, B. Swizlo, Epik, Psy-Fi, DJ Touch, Haiku and Razle Dazle (aka Itchie, see above). The inimitable Sonny Wong did the cover (see above). Buy one online (humboldtmusicproject. wordpress.com). Makes a great gift. I guess that’s it. In case I don’t see you, good afternoon, good evening and good night. The End … l The Humboldt Music Project 2012 Painting by Sonny Wong Jeane Dixon wrongly predicted a planetary alignment in 1962 would destroy the world. Her revised Armageddon date is 2020. northcoastjournal.com • North Coast Journal • Thursday, Dec. 20, 2012 31 Berel Alexander Friday at the Garberville Theater, Saturday at the Arcata Playhouse venue THE ALIBI 744 9th St. Arcata. 822-3731 ANGELINA INN Fernbridge 725-5200 ARCATA PLAYHOUSE 822-1575 ARCATA THEATRE LOUNGE 1036 G St. Info line: 822-1220 BAR-FLY PUB 91 Commercial, Eureka 443-3770 BEACHCOMBER II CAFÉ Bayside BEAR RIVER CASINO 733-9644 11 Bear Paws Way, Loleta BLUE LAKE CASINO 668-9770 777 Casino Way, Blue Lake CHAPALA CAFÉ Eureka 443-9514 CHER-AE HEIGHTS 677-3611 27 Scenic Dr. Trinidad CLAM BEACH INN McKinleyville EUREKA INN PALM LOUNGE 518 7th St. Eureka 497-6093 FIELDBROOK MARKET 839-0521 GALLAGHER’S Eureka 442-1177 GARBERVILLE THEATER HUMBOLDT BREWS 826-2739 856 10th St. Arcata JAMBALAYA 915 H St. Arcata 822-4766 LIBATION 761 8th St. Arcata 825-7596 LIGHTHOUSE GRILL Trinidad 677-0077 LIL’ RED LION 1506 5th St Eureka 444-1344 THE LOCAL 517 F St. Eureka 497-6320 LOGGER BAR 510 Railroad Ave. Blue Lake 668-5000 MAD RIVER BREWERY 101 Taylor Way Blue Lake 668-5680 NOCTURNUM 206 W 6th St. Eureka OM SHALA YOGA 858 10th St. Arcata OLD TOWN COFFEE & CHOC. 211 F St. Eureka 445-8600 PEARL LOUNGE 507 2nd St. Eureka 444-2017 RAMONE’S 2297 Harrison Ave. Eureka RED FOX TAVERN 415 5th St Eureka REDWOOD CURTAIN BREWING 550 South G St., Arcata 826-7222 REDWOOD RAKS 824 L Street, Arcata 616-6876 ROBERT GOODMAN WINES 937 10th St. Arcata 826-WINE SHAMUS T BONES 407-3550 191 Truesdale St., Eureka SIDELINES 732 9th St. Arcata 822-0919 THE SIREN’S SONG 325 2nd St. Eureka SIX RIVERS BREWERY 1300 Central Ave. McK. 839-7580 THE SPEAKEASY 411 Opera Alley, Eureka 444-2244 TOBY & JACKS 764 9th St. Arcata TIP TOP CLUB 6269 Loma Ave., Eureka 443-5696 thur 12/20 Dirty Dancing Tropical Edition: Pressure Anya (DJs) 10:30pm Blue Lotus (dinner jazz) 6-9pm Random Acts of Comedy Doors 7:30pm $5 Happy Hour everyday 4-6pm $1 off wells & pints Karaoke w/ Chris Clay 8pm Karaoke with KJ Leonard 8pm Throwback Thursday DJ Night w/ Accurate Productions 9pm Kindred Spirits (bluegrass) 9pm Pint Night Microbrew pints $2 Seabury Gould & Evan Mordan 6:30pm Open daily noon-11pm until 2am most music nights fri 12/21 Find us on Facebook Karaoke w/ DJ Marv - all ages 9:30pm NightHawk, Nebulawn Mower 8pm World Famous Apocalypse: Danny Corn, Comma and Hypha 9:30pm $15 Facebook.com/LikeBarFly St. John & the Sinners (blues for the end of the world) 9pm 707 (rock) 9pm The Tumbleweeds (cowboy) 6-8pm Dr. Squid (rock) no cover 9pm Lobby Dance: Eureka Brass 7-9pm Palm Blues Jam 9pm-midnight True Gospel Singers (soul) 7-9pm Pappa Paul (folk) 6:30pm Berel Alexander Solstice 8pm $10 Missing Link’s Last Soul Night On Earth (5 vinyl DJs) 9pm sharp In Human Creation Holiday Bizarre 9p Brian Post (piano) 7-10pm sat 12/22 No further live music until Jan 18, 2013 Yaeger Creek Boys (rock) 9:30pm Berel Alexander Solstice II 8pm $10 The Truman Show Doors 7:30pm $5 Happy Hour everyday 4-6pm $1 off wells & pints Rick Park (folk/blues) 10:30am Twango Macallen (country) no cover 9pm Doug Fir and the 2x4s (multi-generational rock) 9pm The Tumbleweeds (cowboy) 6-8pm Dr. Squid (rock) no cover 9pm Post-End of the World Dance Party w/DJ Merrick 9pm-1am Pappa Paul (folk) 6:30pm Happy Hour 3- 6 pm every day Spirit Vibrations Holiday Jam 10pm Squar Peg (stranger chamber) 7-10pm We got beer. www.facebook.com/511ﬁveeleven 707-268-3852 Open Tuesday–Sunday, 5 p.m. until everyone’s gone • • • • food service until 10 p.m. wood ﬁred oven family-friendly live music on the weekends myspace.com/ littleredlioneurekacalif It’s a bar. Solstice/The End: Seed, The Movers and the Shakers 7pm Trifecta (acousitic) 6pm Food Truck Night: Taqueria La Barca 5-8pm Pressure Anya Zombie Apocalypse 10p Winter Solstice Beneﬁt: Sing! 7:30pm www.OldTownCoffeeEureka.com BA-DUM-CHH Comedy’s “Last Comedy Show Ever” 9pm Carpathian’s Winter Stories Around the Christmas Fire 7pm DJ Jsun (dance music) 10pm Blake Ritter (ﬁddle) 6-9pm Jeff DeMark and the LaPatinas 8-11 pm Have a beer while shopping for last minute gifts Jenny and David (blues/soul) 7-9:30pm Itchie Fingaz (dance music) 10pm Naughty or Nice Xmas Party 10pm $5 Tasting room open again! West African (Jade) 5:30-7pm Zumba Toning (Bella) 5:30pm Good Taste Tasting Room www.robertgoodmanwines.com Kenny Ray and the Mighty Rovers (country swing) 8pm DJ music 10pm This Is Grindhouse w/Wrye + 8pm Chris Parreira (songwriter) 9pm Open Sunday-Thursday 4-11pm Friday and Saturday 4pm-2am Throwback Thursdays Open for pints, goblets, growlers, kegs, and merchandise - new space. Zumba with Mimi 9:30-10:30am Congolese 5:30pm What do you call someone who doesn’t believe in Father Christmas? Open daily 11:30am-9:30pm DJ music 10pm The End of the World as We Know It w/ DJ Zephyr 9pm ShugaFoot Band (jazz/blues) 8pm Ladies night ($1 off drinks) 8pm DJ music 10pm Friday and Saturday lap dance specials Saturday noon-9pm redwoodraks.com A rebel without a Claus! Come in for a great dinner! DJ music 10pm Uptown Kings (blues) 9pm Buddy Reed (blues) 8pm MXMSTR KRSHN2N 10pm www.fabuloustiptop.com 32 NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 20, 2012 • northcoastjournal.com A prediction attributed to Nostradamus stating the “King of Terror” would come from the sky in “1999 and seven months.” entertainment in bold includes paid listings clubs • concerts • cafés bands • djs • karaoke • drink & food specials • pool tournaments • and more sun 12/23 www.thealibi.com Mike Riley’s Country Jam noon-4pm The Polar Express Doors 5:30pm $5 Closed Sundays On the Web at www.arcatatheater.com Merry Christmas! mon 12/24 Find us on Facebook tues 12/25 Menu at www.thealibi.com wed 12/26 Find us on Facebook Blue Lotus (dinner jazz) 6-9pm Celebrate New Year’s Eve at the ATL with Absynth Quintet and Likweﬁ Karaoke w/ DJ Marv 9pm-1am A Chance to win $1,000,000 Wild Wing Wednesdays: Chicken wings and $8 domestic pitchers 5pm FREE Pool $3 well drinks Happy Hour Monday thru Friday 5-7pm Happy Hours 4-6pm $1 off pints/wells Happy Hours 4-6pm $1 off pints/wells Pint Night 6pm-close $2 beer pints Wing Special 1 lb. for $5 Free pool No Limit Texas Holdem Tournament 6:30pm Monday Night Football on the big screen + Flat Screen TV giveaways 8-Ball Tournaments at 8pm Night Before Christmas Dance Party 9pm Merry Christmas! Fat Tire Tuesdays $2.00 Fat Tire Pints Karaoke with Chris Clay 8pm Closed for Christmas A Chance to win $1,000,000 Karaoke with KJ Leonard 8pm Karaoke w/Chris Clay 8pm 9-ball tournament 8pm O Christmas Tree! O Christmas Tree! Much pleasure thou can’st give me. Eureka Car Stereo Car Audio • Mobile Video iPod and Bluetooth Solutions 15th & Broadway, Eureka 445-3283 All shows 21+ www.humbrews.com Sundaze: Deep Groove Society 9pm Open daily noon-11pm until 2am most music nights Happy Hour 3- 6 pm every day Buddy Reed (blues) 7-9pm Spend New Year’s Eve with River Valley Mud and The Trouble Dancehall Reggae Night 10pm Joe Garceau (songs) 5-7pm Don’t think of it as work Think of it as fun! Sunday night potluck dinner 6pm Beer Trufﬂes are yummy. Did we mntion the beer? We have liquor too. Monday night Football Free popcorn Closing early Repeat: We got beer. myspace.com/ littleredlioneurekacalif Buddy Reed (blues) 8pm Wednesday open mic starting in Jan - 8pm Merry Christmas! Closed for Christmas, have a merry one. Humboldt H umboldt H Hoodies oodies • Hats • Beanies • Tshirts Heather’s Band 6pm Whomp Whomp Wednesday (EDM) www.OldTownCoffeeEureka.com Tequila Tuesdays muchas variedades Sunday-Thursday 4pm-2am Friday and Saturday 3pm-2am www.pearlloungeeureka.com www.pearlloungeeureka.com Sunday noon-9pm Breakdance with Reckless Rex Atienza 5-7pm $10 Ypou know, wine makes a great gift. Have a signature cocktail in the bar! Weekday Hours M-F 3pm to 9pm Live Band Swing Night 7-10pm $5 Find us on Facebook Open daily 11:30am-9:30pm www.redwoodcurtainbrewing.com redwoodraks.com Closed for Xmas Happy Holidays! Open 4-9pm on Christmas Day Find us on Facebook. Breakdance Class 4:30-5:30pm Salsa Masquerade Pre-New Years Party 9pm $5 Come have lunch 11:30am-4pm HBG • ROOR • Illadelph • Vaporizers rs Now serving beer and wine Open Sunday-Thursday 7am-9pm Friday/Saturday 7am-10pm. Open mic w/ Mike Anderson (music/spoken) 6:30pm BUY ANY 2 HOODIES SAVE $10 BUY ANY 2 TSHIRTS SAVE $5 BUY ANY 2 HATS/BEANIES SAVE $5 EUREKA BAYSHORE MALL 707-476-0400 ARCATA 987 H ST. 707-822-3090 NEW HUMBOLDT DESIGNS JUST ARRIVED, AND THEY WILL GO FAST SO COME IN TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF OUR SALE: NFL Brunch 10am Trivia Night 8pm Sunday Mimosa and Bloody Mary specials Like us on Facebook Karaoke w/ DJ Marv 9pm (and sushi) Live music 7pm 2-for-1 DD lap dances Closed for Christmas ShugaFoot Band (jazz/blues) 7pm 2 Dollar Tuesdays $2 beer / $2 lap dances 6R Smoked Out BBQ 5-10pm Wednesday Happy Hour 4-6:30pm Ladies/Amateur Night Ladies get in free! WWW.HUMBOLDTCLOTHING.COM It was feared that Halley’s Comet would be pulled into Earth’s orbit on April 29, 1988. northcoastjournal.com • NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 20, 2012 • Locally Blown Glass • 33 The G,red Indoors'; WE'VE GOT YOUR NEW YEAR'S EVE COVEREDI CALL OUR FRIENDS AT THE LIGHTHOUSE INN FOR SPECIAL RATES @ 707-464-3993 34 North Coast Journal • Thursday, Dec. 20, 2012 • northcoastjournal.com It was feared that a Y2K computer bug would crash computers and society would cease to function. TWO-THOUSAND DU-DUH TWELVE. PARTY OVER. OOPS. OUT OF TIME. SO FRIDAY WE GONNA PARTY LIKE IT’S … UH, THAT DOESN’T MAKE SENSE. YOU SHOULD MAYBE JUST LET YOUR SOUL SOAR ONE LAST TIME AS THE MISSING LINK CREW PRESENTS THE LAST SOUL NIGHT ON EARTH, DEC. 21, AT HUMBREWS IN ARCATA. SHAKE WHAT YOUR MAMA GAVE YOU … BEFORE IT’S TAKEN AWAY. 20 thursday COMEDY Random Acts of Comedy. 8 p.m. Arcata Theatre Lounge, 1036 G St. Humboldt’s funniest freaks this side of the asylum, local loons and possible pole dancers perform. $6/$10 adv. 822-1220. MEETINGS Audubon Society Monthly Meeting. Noon. Golden Harvest Cafe, 1062 G St., Arcata. Come discuss local and bigger-picture conservation topics with others interested in environmental issues. 442-9353. ETC. Non-therapy Poetry Learning Group. Noon. Arcata Community Center, 321 Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Parkway. Share, discuss, explore through new poetry experiences. 442-1466. Move to Amend Afﬁliate Meeting. 7-8:30 p.m. Humboldt State University Library, Arcata. Get involved in community awareness, fundraising and political activism. movetoamend.org. 832-2018. 21 friday HOLIDAY EVENTS Story Time with Santa. 10:30 a.m. Fortuna Library, 753 14th St. Photos on Santa’s lap and stories with Rena Stiver. 725-3460. Live Nativity. 6-8 p.m. First Covenant Church Carriage House, 2526 J St., Eureka. Jesus! Mary! Joseph! View eight different scenes while listening to a recorded narrative from the comfort of your car. www.fcceureka.org. 442-6774. McKinleyville Arts Night. 6-8 p.m. Various locations throughout McKinleyville. Celebration of local artists and their works. 834-6460. World Famous Mayan Apocalypse. 9:30 p.m. Arcata Theatre Lounge, 1036 G St. Ring in the end of civilization with electronic music artists Danny Corn, Comma, Grenier and Hypha. $15. worldfamousproductions.net. 822-1220. Zombie Apocalypse World End Party. 10 p.m. Nocturnum, 206 West Sixth St., Eureka. DJs Anya, Itchieﬁngaz and Gabe Pressure help you prepare for your brain to be eaten. $5. The Holiday Bizarre III: End Game. 9 p.m. Jambalaya, 915 H St., Arcata. In Human Creation presents a variety fund raising show for the development of Redwood Raks World Dance Studio. Music by Drifter Killer, Tellum, Declan Cowan and a surprise jamband. $5. jambalayaarcata.com. 822-4766. Winter Solstice/End of the Mayan Calendar Celebration. 7 p.m. Logger Bar, 631 Second St., Blue Lake. Dinner and music by Seed and The Movers and the Shakers. 668-5000. Winter Solstice Beneﬁt. 7:30 p.m. Om Shala Yoga Center, 858 10th St., Arcata. Sing your heart out with Shemaia, Traci and Peggy. Bring a can of food. Beneﬁt for Hospice of Humboldt. $10. omshalayoga.com. 825-9642. Changing Tomorrow. 8 p.m. Arcata Playhouse, 1251 Ninth St. Celebrate the end of the Mayan calendar and winter solstice with music by Nighthawk and Nebulawn Mower. emmacenter.org. 822-1575. ART The Opening at the End. 5:30 p.m. Morris Graves Museum of Art, 636 F St., Eureka. Opening reception for Peter Santino’s installation pieces that deal with the problematic end of time and the world as predicted by the Mayan calendar or Mesoamerican Long Count calendar. E-mail email@example.com. 442-0278. SPOKEN WORD Winter Stories Around the Christmas Fire. 7 p.m. Old Town Coffee and Chocolates, 211 F St., Eureka. Spooky holiday ghost stories with Humboldt’s wandering spectre and storyteller Carpathian. With guests Paul Woodland, April Parrott and Howard Emerson. www.patientcreatures. com. 445-8600. Are you in the wedding biz? Will you be in the North Coast’s only 100% local Wedding Guide? Call 442-1400 to speak to a rep today! Ad space and free listings are still available. The 2013 Wedding Guide hits newsstands in February! INSIDE ◆ 2013 “OTHER” HOLIDAY EVENTS MEETINGS The Last Soul Night On Earth. 9 p.m. Humboldt Brews, 856 10th St., Arcata. Last chance to move your ass with resident DJs Matt n’ Adam, Jaymorg, Mantease and King Maxwell. $5. humbrews.com. 826-2739. Berel Alexander Solstice Celebration. 8 p.m. Garberville Theater, 766 Redwood St. Humboldt native returns for a show with a full band and openers Crossroads. $15. 923-7878. Eureka Sequoia Garden Club. 11 a.m.-1:30 p.m. First Covenant Church Carriage House, 2526 J St., Eureka. Monthly meeting. This month’s program features Deborah Giraud, UC Cooperative Extension Farm and community adviser. E-mail firstname.lastname@example.org. 442-1387. VENUES ◆ JEWELRY ◆ GOWNS & TUXEDOES ◆ FLOWERS ◆ INSIDE ◆ INSIDE ◆ BAKERIES ◆ VENUES ◆ VENUES ◆ THE END AND MORE… JEWELRY ◆ jEwElry ◆ GOWNS & TUXEDOES ◆ GOwNS & TUXEDOES ◆ FLOWERS ◆ flOwErS ◆ BAKERIES ◆ BAKErIES ◆ AND MORE… AND mOrE… INSIDE Venues Jewelry Gowns & Tuxedoes Flowers Bakeries And More… WeddingG.Cover.07 1 2/8/07, 11:40 AM In late 1976 Pat Robertson predicted that the end of the world was coming in October or November, 1982. northcoastjournal.com • NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 20, 2012 35 continued from previous page AS IF THE END OF HUMANITY WASN’T SPOOKY ENOUGH, WANDERING SPECTER/STORYTELLER CARPATHIAN JUST FEELS THE NEED TO FREAK YOU OUT A BIT MORE. HUMBOLDT’S GHOST-FACED RACONTEUR HOSTS A NIGHT OF HAUNTING HOLIDAY-THEMED TALES TITLED WINTER STORIES AROUND THE CHRISTMAS FIRE ON FRIDAY AT OLD TOWN COFFEE AND CHOCOLATE WITH FRIENDS PAUL WOODLAND, APRIL PARROTT AND HOWARD EMERSON. BOO! YOU DO NOT HAVE ENOUGH APOCALYPSE-Y THINGS TO DO THIS WEEK. THUS, ARTIST PETER SANTINO IS TAKING OVER THE MORRIS GRAVES MUSEUM OF ART WITH HIS BUILDING-WIDE INSTALLATION THE EXHIBITION AT THE END OF TIME, AT THE END OF THE WORLD. A GRAND, CATERED OPENING RECEPTION WITH THE ARTIST TAKES PLACE ON -- WHEN ELSE -- DEC. 21 AT 5:30 P.M. BE THERE IF, WELL, YOU KNOW … Will’s Final “To Do” List 7 a.m. — Carnivore brekkie at Golden Harvest because their bacon is the best bacon. (I read somewhere that obsessing over bacon is played out, but that really doesn’t matter now, does it?) Order more bacon. 8 a.m. — Zoo, baby! There’s really no reason to not snuggle red pandas at this point. Hop that fence. Seduce with leftover bacon. Snuggle hard. 9:30 a.m. — Commandeer a Hummer and head for the Arcata Plaza. After some signiﬁcant donut time, throw a rope around McKinley’s neck and see how close you can get to recreating the scene from when Iraqis pulled down Saddam Hussein’s statue. Brieﬂy celebrate with Plazoids, ‘cuz why not? 11:30 a.m. — Redwood Yogurt. Noon — Undigniﬁed rib-chowin’ session at Shamus T-Bones. Wash barbecue sauce off face by sticking head into the stream of water that shoots from behind the bar. Leave refreshed. 1 p.m. — Take a ﬁnal drive south through our majestic redwoods. (If you have a head-on collision with a semi while driving through Richardson Grove, skip the rest of the stuff below.) Listen to Sublime’s Nature Center, 220 Stamps Lane, Manila. Join Michael Kauffmann, author of Conifer Country, for a short presentation about the history of the evergreen as a Christmas tree followed by a two-hour conifer-focused walk. friendsofthedunes. org. 444-1397. Audubon Society Marsh Field Trip. 8:30 a.m. Meet at the parking lot at the end of South I Street. Led by Pat Bitton. Bring binoculars and have a great morning birding. Trip held rain or shine. 442-9353. Friends of the Marsh Tour. 2 p.m. Arcata Marsh and Wildlife Sanctuary Interpretive Center, 600 S. G St. Meet leader Jenny Hanson for a 90-minute walk focusing on the plants of the marsh. 826-2359. @ncj_of_humboldt Dec. 20 Dec. 27 Thurs Dec 20 - Random Acts of Comedy Doors at 7:30 p.m. $6 All ages Sat Dec 22 - The Truman Show (1998) Doors at 7:30 p.m. $5 Rated PG Sun Dec 23 - The Polar Express (2004) Doors 5:30 p.m. $5 Rated G Thurs Dec 27 - Sci Fi Night ft. The War of the Worlds (1953) Doors at 6 p.m. All ages Free So Humboldtian, you’re trolling the ol’ NCJ calendar lookin’ for something to do before the world ends this Friday? That’s cute. But if you really want to maximize your bliss in Humboldt’s ﬁnal hours, y’all should mount up with me. Here’s our itinerary, if yer savvy: 4:30 a.m. — Rise. Shine. 5 a.m. — Purchase all remaining boxes/bottles/ jugs of laundry detergent from WinCo for one ﬁnal, epic “sudsageddon” in the Marie Callender’s fountain. Giggle. 6 a.m. — Break into Bayshore Mall’s Bouncea-Palooza. Oil up the various bounce-enabling structures to increase difﬁculty. Bounce. Fall down. NOTE: For events listed in red, please check to make sure the earth didn’t ’splode before attending. -AG last album begrudgingly. 4 p.m. — Return north. Listen to Bob Marley’s Legend happily. 5 p.m. — Stop by Ferndale. Roll into The Palace with a chromed out ghetto blaster. Set it on the bar and hit play. Walk out as N.W.A.’s Straight Outta Compton blares. 6 p.m. — “Ride” every skateboard at The Local. Use the last of the chalk writing messages on the wall for future alien races to discover. “JUST MISSED US,” or something more clever. 9 p.m. — Purge. Likely. 9:30 p.m. — Up to A-town. Roll into The Last Soul Night on Earth at HumBrews with every Twister board you could ﬁnd in the county. Right foot green, left foot yellow, etc. 11 p.m. — Back to E-town. All remaining Shanty Dogs. Down the hatch. 11:45 p.m. — Edit Wikipedia. Big time. Midnight — Never worry again how plummeting marijuana prices may affect the local economy. See y’all in Seven-O-Heaven! — “WIll” as told to Andrew Goff silent auction. $15. Yoga For Lost Coast Camp. 9-11 a.m. Mattole Valley Community Center, 29230 Mattole Road, Petrolia. Yogis do 108 sun salutations to beneﬁt Lost Coast Camp scholarship program. Followed by brunch. $20/$10 just brunch. crowdrise.com. Traditional Tibetan Buddhist Meditation. 11 a.m. Arcata Holistic Health Center, 940 Ninth St. Dalai Ani Kunzang Drolma leads meditation sessions. E-mail structuralthomas@gmail. com. 825-1088. 22 saturday MUSIC Berel Alexander Solstice Celebration. 8 p.m. Arcata Playhouse, 1251 Ninth St. Humboldt native returns for a show with a full band and openers Kombucha Brothers. $10. 822-1575. HOLIDAY EVENTS Not Too Late! Craft Fair. 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Arcata United Methodist Church, 1761 11th St. Variety of items by fun and funky local crafters. Live Nativity. 6-8 p.m. First Covenant Church Carriage House. See Dec. 21 listing. FOOD ETC. 23 sunday HOLIDAY EVENTS ETC. Live Nativity. 6-8 p.m. First Covenant Church Carriage House. See Dec. 21 listing. Redwood Coast Scrabble Club. 1-5 p.m. Arcata Community Arcata Winter Farmer’s Market. 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Open space just outside Brio Café, Arcata. Fresh, local produce. ncgc.org. Zumbathon Fundraiser. 11 a.m.-1:30 p.m. Bayside Grange, 2297 Jacoby Creek Road. Beneﬁt for Olivia Kuljian who lost her family in Big Lagoon on Thanksgiving weekend. Rafﬂe and arcatatheatre.com • 822-1220 • 1036 G St. OUTDOORS Conifer Christmas Walk. 10 a.m.-1 p.m. Humboldt Coastal northcoastjournal.com 36 NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 20, 2012 • In 1991, Louis Farrakhan declared that the Gulf War would be the “War of Armageddon which is the final war.” Movie Times Center, 321 Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Parkway. Fun with words. 677-9242. Film times reflect the most current listings as of Tuesday afternoon. As schedules at individual theaters sometimes change, we recommend calling ahead to avoid any inconvenience. 707-443-3456 1223 Broadway Street, Eureka Times are for 12/21- 12/24 unless otherwise noted. JACK REACHER 12:10, 3:10, 6:10, 9:10 THIS IS 40 11:40, 2:45, 5:50, 8:55 GUILT TRIP 11:50, 2:15, 4:40, 7:05, 9:30 MONSTERS INC. 3D 11:55, 2:20, 7:10, 9:25 MONSTERS INC. 2D 4:45 THE HOBBIT: AN UNEXPECTED JOURNEY 3D 12:30, 3:30, 4:20, 7:20, 8:10 THE HOBBIT: AN UNEXPECTED JOURNEY 2D 11:45, 1:10, 5:00, 8:45 LIfE Of PI 2D 12:00, 2:50, 5:45, 8:40 RISE Of THE GUARDIANS 2D 1:45, 4:10, 6:35 RED DAWN 8:20 LINCOLN 1:35, 5:05, 8:30 TWILIGHT: BREAKING DAWN PT. 2 9:00 SKYfALL 12:05, 6:00 PLAYING fOR KEEPS 3:25, 9:15 WRECK IT RALPH 2D 12:15, 2:55, 5:35 24 monday Christmas Eve! (Too bad time ran out.) Broadway Cinema 25 tuesday Christmas! (See above.) 26 wednesday WELLNESS Eureka Mindfulness Group. 7:15 p.m. First Christian Church Eureka, 730 K St. Led by Cindee Grace. Topic: “The Mystical Gap Between Thoughts.” Fragrance free, please. $3/$6 free will donation. 269-7044. What's the differeNCe betWeeN a dWarf aNd the hobbit? a dWarf is short! hey-oh! 27 thursday ETC. Non-therapy Poetry Learning Group. Noon. Arcata Community Center. See Dec. 20 listing. Mordor? More Like Bored-or! Peter Jackson’s bloated Hobbit sucks the magic from Middle Earth By John J. Bennett email@example.com THE HOBBIT: AN UNEXPECTED JOURNEY. My paperback copy of The Hobbit, circa 1989, runs to 304 pages all told. This movie (part one of three!) clocks in at an astonishing, almost unbelievably protracted 169 minutes. Right: just shy of three hours, and we don’t even get to the dragon or the giant spiders. To the Peter Jackson faithful, this criticism will likely be dismissed as pedantic and impatient, and I get that. For them, the more time basking in the computergenerated splendor of Middle Earth the better. But Jackson’s vision of Tolkien’s world didn’t draw me in the first time around, and now, with the novelty of that vision gone like Bilbo’s second breakfast, there is only the story to sustain me. To Tolkien’s credit, The Hobbit remains concise yet richly detailed, heartfelt, suspenseful and yes, a little bit magical. By blowing out the proportions of his novel as they have, Jackson and Co. have somehow reduced the saga to far less than the sum of its parts. 707-839-3456 *= fRI - SUN 1575 Betty Court, McKinleyville Times are for 12/21- 12/24 unless otherwise noted. MONSTERS INC. 3D 1:00, 6:00, 8:20 MONSTERS INC. 2D 3:30 JACK REACHER 12:10, 3:10, 6:10, 9:10 GUILT TRIP 11:50, 2:15, 4:40, 7:05, 9:30 THE HOBBIT: AN UNEXPECTED JOURNEY 3D 12:30, 4:15, 8:00 THE HOBBIT: AN UNEXPECTED JOURNEY 2D 1:10, 5:00, 8:40 THIS IS 40 11:45, 2:50, 5:55, 9:00 RISE Of THE GUARDIANS 3D 6:25 RISE Of THE GUARDIANS 2D 12:45 LIfE Of PI 2D 3:20 LIfE Of PI 3D 8:50 LINCOLN 1:45, 5:10, 8:30 Mill Creek Cinema Heads Up… Free Chronic Disease Management Workshop Series. Aligning Forces Humboldt will be offering the six-week Our Pathways to Health workshop series starting in January at locations in Eureka, Fortuna, McKinleyville and Garberville. Addresses challenges for people living with long-term health conditions like diabetes, high blood pressure, arthritis, COPD, depression or chronic pain. Contact Michelle at 445-2806 ext. 4 to sign up. Pre-registration is required and space is limited. ● No Reviews Wutchoodoin’? submit your events online or by e-mail Deadline: Noon Thursday the week before publication northcoastjournal.com firstname.lastname@example.org For the handful who don’t know, The Hobbit is a sort-of prequel to The Lord of the Rings saga. Decades before the events of that story, a young Bilbo Baggins (played here by an excellent Martin Freeman) is persuaded by gray wizard Gandalf (Ian McKellen) to help a bunch of dwarves steal back their gold (and their ancestral lair) from a dragon. The adventure is — no spoiler — fraught with peril and orcs and many, many beards. Along the way, Bilbo discovers his inner hero but also confronts the darker aspects of hobbit nature when he stumbles upon and steals The One Ring. It’s been decades since I read the novel, but I still have sense memories of the delicious detail and rousing action. I can only assume that Jackson had a different reaction to the book, as he seems to have found more impact in the vastness of Tolkien’s imagined world than in the authenticity and nuance of his characters, or the taut thread of plot tying everything together. In Jackson’s version, the continued on next page Minor Theatre 707-822-3456 * = fRI-MON 1001 H Street, Arcata Times are for 12/21- 12/24 unless otherwise noted. A LATE QUARTET *1:45, 4:15, 6:40, 9:10 ANNA KARENINA *2:50, 5:50, 8:50 THE HOBBIT: AN UNEXPECTED JOURNEY *1:10, 4:50, 8:30 707-725-2121 *= SAT-MON ** = fRI-SUN 1241 Main Street, Fortuna ^ = STARTS CHRISTMAS DAY Times are for 12/21 - 12/27 unless otherwise noted. JACK REACHER *12:30, 3:30, 6:30, **9:30 MONSTERS INC. 3D 12:20, 2:40, 5:00, 7:15, **9:35 RISE Of THE GUARDIANS *12:05, *2:25, 4:45, 7:05, **9:25 LIfE Of PI *12:40, 3:55, 6:40, **9:40 THE HOBBIT: AN UNEXPECTED JOURNEY 3D *1:45, 5:30 THE HOBBIT: AN UNEXPECTED JOURNEY 2D *12:15, 4:00, 7:45, **9:15 (ExCEpT CHrSiTMAS DAy) ^PARENTAL GUIDANCE 12:00, 2:20, 4:40, 7:00, 9:20 ^LES MISERABLES 12:10, 3:40, 7:10 ^DJANGO UNCHAINED 12:25, 3:50, 7:20 fortuna Theater 766 redwood Drive, Garberville RISE Of THE GUARDIANS Garberville Theater 707-923-3580 12/22 - 12/27: 7:30 ExCEpT 12/26: 6:30 Japanese cult Aum Shinrikyo world would be destroyed by a nuclear Oct. 30 and Nov. 29, 2003. English physicist Isaac Newtonpredicted predictedthe that Christ’s second coming would begin inwar the between year 2000. northcoastjournal.com NorthCOAST CoastJOURNAL JourNal• •THURSDAY, thursday,DEC. deC. 20, 2012 NORTH 20, 2012 northcoastjournal.com •• 37 37 continued from previous page action moves lazily from long, dull dialog sequences to frenetic, gigantic, almost indigestible battles and back again. Much walking takes place. The villains, though terrifically ugly and thus obviously very bad, fail to make much of an impression. The baker’s dozen of dwarves, whose story is really being told here, are nearly indistinguishable from one another. Aside from slight variations in their beard hair and appetites, they could be interchanged, scene to scene, with no one the wiser. As I mentioned above, Freeman makes as much as he can of Bilbo with an affably frustrating blend of hesitation and hard-headedness. McKellen does what you’d expect, which is generally pleasant and satisfying. But regardless of charm or talent, neither actor could ease the oppressive itch of boredom that set in at around hour two, maybe before. As in the LOTR movies, Jackson has created a vast, pretty and complex world. But he seems too pleased with his own creation, and misguidedly content to let the characters just wander around in it. The story can’t sustain the scale he envisions for it. The characters, the vital subtleties, the tension and emotion dissipate against the backdrop and all but disappear. PG13. 169m. — John J. Bennett THIS IS 40. From writer-director Judd Apatow comes this sequel to/spinoff of Knocked Up, in which the great Paul Rudd and Apatow’s real-life wife, Leslie Mann, star as a married couple dealing with the warts-and-all nature of marriage and parenting on the cusp of middle age. R. 134m. JACK REACHER. That sniggering you hear is from fans of the Jack Reacher novels, which describe the character — a former Army major turned vigilante drifter — as a 6-foot-5-inch blonde with a 50-inch chest and lethal fighting skills. Here he’s portrayed by wee Scientologist Tom Cruise. Snigger. PG13. 130m. DJANGO UNCHAINED. Merry Christmas, lovers of cinematic badassery. The incomparable Quentin Tarantino brings his grindhouse aesthetic to this tale of slavery and revenge set in the antebellum south, starring Jamie Foxx, Christoph Waltz, Leonardo DiCaprio and Samuel L. Jackson. R. 165m. Previews A LATE QUARTET. Philip Seymour Hoffman, Christopher Walken and Catherine Keener (yowza, what a cast!) star as members of a world-renowned string quartet jockeying for position in the face of terminal illness, sexual attraction and concert-hall egos. R. 105m. LES MISÉRABLES. Merry Christmas, lovers of musicals based on French historical novels. Director Tom Hooper (The King’s Speech) brings the Broadway fixture to the silver screen with songbirding from Hugh Jackman, Anne Hathaway and Russell Crowe. PG13. 157m. PARENTAL GUIDANCE. Merry Christmas, lovers of Billy Crystal and Bette Midler. They star as grandparents using old-school discipline on their wacky, 21st century grandkids in this comedy from director Andy Fickman, best known for directing movies starring The Rock. PG. 104m. The Arcata Theatre Lounge is kind of like your cool friend with good taste in movies, so when it schedules one of your personal faves, it feels like a validation. Such is the case with The Truman Show (1998), director Peter Weir’s subversive and resonant comedy about a guileless man named Truman Burbank (Jim Carrey, never better) who gradually becomes aware that he was born and raised on a soundstage, surrounded by actors and hidden cameras, the unwitting star of his own 24-hour reality program. Saturday, 8 p.m. Sunday sees the arrival of The Polar Express (2004), Robert Zemeckis’ motion-capture holiday flick starring the voice of Tom Hanks in half a dozen roles. 6 p.m. MONSTERS, INC. 3D. See, there’s a prequel coming out next summer called Monsters University, so obviously you should take the kids to see the original in 3D. G. 92m. RED DAWN. Yes, they remade that Patrick Swayze movie from the ’80s. This time it’s the North Koreans invading small-town America. PG13. 114m. RISE OF THE GUARDIANS. Santa, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy and Jack Frost team up to make kids believe in them again. PG. 97m. SKYFALL. James Bond battles his Freudian demons and a swishy-sinister Javier Bardem in one of the most satisfying 007 films to date. PG13. 143m. WRECK-IT RALPH. A video game bad guy with a good heart sets out on an existential quest across the pixilated landscapes of Pac-Man, Street Fighter and the like. PG. 108m. — Ryan Burns List your class – just 50 cents/word per issue! Deadline: Monday, noon. Place online at www.northcoastjournal.com or e-mail: classiﬁed@northcoastjournal.com. Listings must be paid in advance by check, cash or Visa/MasterCard. Many classes require pre-registration. EARLY HOLIDAY DEADLINES edition deadline is Wednesday Dec. 19 the Jan. 3, 2013 edition deadline is Wednesday Dec. 26 Arts & Crafts CERAMICS FOR YOUTH & ADULTS. Play with clay! Get your creative juices flowing by learning & practicing ceramics! Youth ages 7-12 years. Adults 18 & over. Classes starting Jan. 24. Days & times vary by class. $40-60 fee includes materials. Register online at www.eurekarecreation.com or in person at Adorni Center. Call 441-4244 for more info. (AC-0103) CREATING TUMBLERS & MUGS. Ongoing, weekly the first and third Mon., 6:30-9 p.m. Free. Create whimsical ceramic mugs for our fundraising events. All ages welcome. Attend 3 workshops and receive a final product free. Fire Arts Center, 520 South G St., Arcata. 707-826-1445, www.fireartsarcata.com (AC-1220) KNITTING 101 AT YARN. Thurs.s, Jan. 10, 17 & 24, 5:30-7 p.m. $15 each class. Jan. 10 - Learn Continental style knitting technique. Jan. 17 - Learn how to knit cables! Jan. 24 - Colorwork for beginners. Beginning knitting level required. Call 443-YARN for more info. and to register. (AC-0103) LEARN TO KNIT AT YARN. Sat.s, Jan. 12, 19, 26 & Feb. 9, 3-4:30 p.m. $60, plus materials. Learn the basics of how to knit and make a simple project. Call 443-YARN for more info. and to register. (AC-0110) ONE-ON-ONE INTRO TO LAMPWORKING. $50. (2 hour workshop) materials included. By Arrangement with Kevin Stockwell at 826-1896. Opportunity to learn torch basics! Personalized workshop begins with discussion of glass-working topics and thorough demonstration. Then apply the knowledge and work on developing the skills introduced in this class. 2013 Class sessions: Spring Registration March 4: Classes April 1-June 7. Summer Registration May 20: Classes June 24–Aug. 30. Fall Registration Aug. 19: Classes Sept. 16–Nov. 22. Fire Arts Center, 520 South G Street, Arcata. 826-1445, www.fireartsarcata.com. (AC-1220) post-apocalypse the Dec. 27, 2012 ANNA KARENINA. Leo Tolstoy’s grand novel struts awkwardly to the screen in this plodding adaptation from director Joe Wright (Atonement). Starring Keira Knightley. R. 129m. THE GUILT TRIP. Odd couple road comedy starring Seth Rogen as The Seth Rogen Character and Barbra Streisand as his embarrassing Jewish mother. PG13. 95m. LIFE OF PI. Ang Lee’s adaptation of the bestselling book by Yann Martel is a visual feast, a technological marvel and a glib homily about spirituality. PG. 127m. LINCOLN. Daniel Day-Lewis delivers a bravura performance in Steven Spielberg’s handsome and rousing biopic, which portrays the deft political wrangling of our 16th president. PG13. 149m. Continuing 442-1400 www.northcoastjournal.com 310 F Street • Eureka • 95501 northcoastjournal.com North COAST Coast JOURNAL Journal • THURSDAY, Thursday, DEC. Dec. 20, 20, 2012 2012 • northcoastjournal.com 38 NORTH Jerry Falwell foresaw God pouring out his judgement on the world on Jan. 1, 2000. WHEEL THROWING 1 & 2, UTILITARIAN FORMS. $180. Wed.s, 7-9 p.m., Jan. 9–March 13. With Bob Raymond. Complete introduction to basic wheelthrowing techniques. Intermediate students: master utilitarian forms, with variety of decorative styles and techniques. Fire Arts Center, 520 South G Street, Arcata. 826-1445, www.fireartsarcata.com (AC-1220) WHEEL THROWING 1 & 2. $180. Wed.s, Jan. 9–March 13 (10 weeks). 3 classes: 9-11 a.m., 11:30 a.m.-1:30 p.m., 2-4 p.m. With Peggy Loudon. Introduction to basic wheel-throwing and glazing techniques. For beginning and returning students. Fire Arts Center, 520 South G Street, Arcata. 826-1445, www.fireartsarcata. com. (AC-1220) REDWOOD RAKS WORLD DANCE STUDIO, ARCATA. West African, Belly Dance, Tango, Salsa, Swing, Breakdance, Jazz, Tap, Modern, Zumba, Hula, Congolese, more! Kids and Adults, 616-6876. (DMT-0228) PIANO LESSONS BEGINNING TO ADVANCED ALL AGES. 30 years joyful experience teaching all piano styles. Juilliard trained, remote lessons available. Nationally Certified Piano Teacher. Humboldtpianostudio.com. (707) 502-9469 (DMT-1226) PIANO LESSONS. Beginners, all ages. Experienced. Judith Louise 476-8919. (DMT-1226) GUITAR/PIANO/VOICE LESSONS. All ages, beginning and intermediate. Seabury Gould 444-8507. (DMT-1227) SAXOPHONE/FLUTE LESSONS. All ages, beginneradvanced, jazz improvisation, technique. Susie Laraine: 441-1343. (DMT-1227) AIKIBOJITSU. Get your black belt in stick! New beginning classes in Aikibojitsu, The Art of the Staff, taught by Tom Read Sensei, Chief Instructor of Northcoast Aikido, with over 40 years of experience in martial arts. Classes meet Sat.s 9 a.m- 10 a.m., at Northcoast Aikido, 890 G Street, Arcata (entrance in back, by fire station). $20 per class, Visit www. aikibojitsu.com (F-0328) ZUMBA WITH MARLA JOY. Elevate, Motivate, Celebrate another day of living. Exercise in Disguise. Now is the time to start, don’t wait. All ability levels are welcome. Every Mon. and Thurs. at the Bayside Grange 6-7 p.m., 2297 Jacoby Creek Rd. $6/$4 Grange members. Every Wed. 6-7 p.m. in Fortuna at the Monday Club, 610 Main St. Every Tues. at the Trinidad Town Hall, Noon and every Thurs. at the Eureka Vets Hall, Noon. Marla Joy (707) 845-4307, marlajoy.zumba. com (F-0110) ZUMBA WITH MIMI. Put the FUN back into your workout! Latin & Pop music, sure to leave you sweaty and smiling! Wed. & Fri. 9:30 a.m. at Redwood Raks in the Old Creamery Building, Arcata. Tues. & Thurs. 9:30 a.m., Fri. 5:30 p.m., Humboldt Capoeira Academy, Arcata. (F-1226) SUN YI’S ACADEMY OF TAE KWON DO. Classes for kids and adults, child care, fitness gym, and more. Tae Kwon Do Mon-Fri 5-6 p.m., 6-7 p.m., Sat 10-11 a.m. Come watch or join a class, 1215 Giuntoli Lane, or visit www.sunyisarcata.com, 825-0182. (F-1227) DANCE-FIT. Dance, aerobics & strength training all in one class ! Mon., Wed. & Fri. 9-10 a.m First class is free. Drop in for $5 per class or 14 classes for $55. No Limits tap & jazz studio, corner of 10th & K st. Arcata. 825-0922 (F-1226) KIDS WINTER CLIMBING PROGRAM. At Far North Climbing Gym. Learn climbing techniques, safety, trust and confidence. Dec. 27 & 28, Jan. 2, 3 & 4, 9 a.m.-1 p.m. $135 for five days or $35 for a single day. Far North Climbing, 10 & K in Arcata. (707) 826-9558. (K-1220) WINTER BREAK CAMP. Join us for roller skating, arts and crafts, sports and more at Blue Lake Winter Break Camp for 5-13 year olds. Dec. 26- Jan. 4, 9 a.m.-5 p.m. at Perigot Park. Full-day or half-day option. Extended care hours available. Register today as space is limited! Register at Blue Lake City Hall, www.bluelake. ca.gov or call Kara Newman, 668-5932, for more information (K-1220) ACTIVE KIDS = HAPPY KIDS. Come learn selfconfidence, discipline and respect while gaining true life skills through martial arts. North Coast Self Defense Academy is offering two introductory lessons for only $14 with this ad. Call or visit- (707) 822-6278 or 820 N St, Building #1 Suite C, Arcata www. northcoastselfdefense.com (K-1226) Communication BE YOURSELF. Participants find their unique attributes and put them to use at LifetreeCafe this week, Sun. Dec., 30, 7 p.m. 76 13th St., Arcata. 672-2919, www.campbellcreek.org for more info. (CMM-1227) INCREASING TEAM SYNERGY. Discover how good teams can make more effective decisions in the workplace. With Janet Ruprecht. Fri., Jan. 11, 8:30 a.m.12:30 p.m. $95 (includes materials). Pre-registration required. Call HSU Distance & Extended Education to register, 826-3731, or visit www.humboldt.edu/ extended (CMM-0103) SIMPLICITY PARENTING 8 WEEK SERIES. Every other Sun., Noon-2 p.m. or Mon., 6-8 p.m. beginning Jan. 13-April 22. In Eureka. Cost $150 plus $20 workbook. Flexible payment options available. Join the slow parenting movement and learn ways to simplify four realms of family life. Slow down and de-clutter your home environment. Create predictable and connecting rhythms that guide and inspire your time together. Simplify your family’s schedule. Reduce the influence of adult concerns, media and consumerism on children to increase resiliency, social and emotional intelligence. This work is powerful, joyful and applicable to families with children of all ages. Contact Diana Nunes Mizer at (775) 313-7332 or visit consciousparentingsolutions.com for more information. (CMM-0110) Fitness ARCATA PLAY CENTER & POSTPARTUM EXCERCISE CLASS. Join Arcata Recreation’s “Just for Me” Postpartum Exercise Class Tues.s, 9-9:45 a.m. Child care provided. Also, bring your children ages birth-5 to Arcata Play Center for fun, socialization and parenting support. Mon.s/Tues.s/Wed.s, 10 a.m.-Noon. Call 822-7091 or visit our website www.cityofarcata. org/rec (F-1220) TAI CHI AT ADORNI. Stretch, limber, tone & strengthen your body while improving focus & coordination! Also reduce stress & manage pain. 4 week class for ages 15 & up, Thurs.s, Noon-1:15 p.m. starting Jan. 10, $60. Register online at www.eurekarecreation. com or visit The Adorni Center, 1011 Waterfront Dr. 441-4244. (F-0103) HUMBOLDT CAPOEIRA ACADEMY. Winter Intersession Dec. 15-Jan. 31. Mon.s & Wed.s: all level kids, 4-5 p.m., all level adults, 5-7 p.m., and Sat.s: open gym/ roda at Noon. Christmas break 12/23-12/31. Rental Space Available. For full class schedule visit www. humboldtcapoeira.com. (707) 498-6155, 865 8th St., Arcata. (F-0131) NORTH COAST SELF DEFENSE ACADEMY. Come learn your choice of Gracie Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, Muay Thai Techniques, Filipino Kali, Jun Fan Stand Up Kickboxing, & Muay Thai/MMA Sparring. Group and private sessions available 7 days a week for men, women and children; all experience and fitness levels welcome. Call or visit (707) 822-6278 or 820 N St., Building #1 Suite C, Arcata www.northcoastselfdefense.com (F-1226) AIKIDO. Is an incredibly fascinating and enriching non-violent martial art with its roots in traditional Japanese budo. Focus is on personal growth and pursuit of deeper truth instead of competition and fighting. Yet the physical power you can develop is very real. Come observe any time and give it a try! The dojo is on Arcata Plaza above the mattress store, entrance is around back. Class every weeknight starting at 6 p.m., beginning enrollment is ongoing. www.northcoastaikido.org, info@northcoastaikido. org, 826-9395. (F-1227) NORTH COAST FENCING ACADEMY. Fencing (with swords!). Improve your mind and body in a fun, intense workout, and a very chill environment. Ages 8 and up. 1459 M St., Arcata, contact Justin (707) 601-1657 text or phone, or email email@example.com (F-1227) Over 50 OSHER LIFELONG LEARNING INSTITUTE (OLLI). Offers dynamic classes for people age 50 and over. Call 826-5880 or visit www.humboldt.edu/olli to register for classes. (O-1227) GENTLE YOGA FOR OLLI. Learn yoga with focus on both floor and standing poses for strength, balance and flexibility at any age. With Patricia Starr. Mon., Jan. 14-Feb. 18, 1:30-3 p.m. $65/OLLI members, $90/ nonmembers. OLLI: 826-5880, www.humboldt.edu/ olli (O-0103) TAI CHI MADE EZ FOR BEGINNERS. Learn a short version of Tai Chi made up of simple, smooth, circular movements designed to stretch, limber, tone and strengthen the body. With Glenda Hesseltine. Mon., Jan. 7-Feb. 11, 3-4:30 p.m. $70/OLLI members, $95/nonmembers. OLLI: 826-5880, www.humboldt. edu/olli (O-0103) Home & Garden GARDENING STUDY SCHOOL. 2nd Course Jan. 4 & 5. 9 a.m-3 p.m, in Eureka. Study Vegetable Gardening, Landscape Design, Pest Management, Container Gardening, Lawns and Lawn Substitutes and How New Plants are Developed. One day $40, two days $75.00 Call 442-1387 for registration form, or email Mgoodwin@northcoast.com. (G-0103) Computers Kids & Teens INTRO TO PHOTOSHOP CS6. With Annie Reid. A fast-paced hands-on exploration of the imaging application for digital camera enthusiasts, designers and other digital media artists. Tues./Thurs., Jan. 14-30, 6:30-9 p.m. $135. Pre-registration required. Call HSU Distance & Extended Education to register, 826-3731, or visit www.humboldt.edu/extended (C-0103) ARCATA BREAK CAMP. Art Camp during school breaks. Kindergarteners-5th graders enjoy art lessons, painting, drawing and other mediums at the Arcata Community Center. Full-day, Half-day or Single-day options. Dec. 26-28 and Dec. 31-Jan. 4. Contact Arcata Recreation Division 822-7091 or visit www.cityofarcata.org/rec. (K-1220) CERAMICS FOR YOUNGER KIDS, AGES 4-7. $60. (Two 4 week classes). Sat.s, 9:30-11 a.m., Jan. 12-Feb. 2, Feb. 16-March 9. With Amanda Steinebach. Have a great time creating with clay. Make 1-2 pieces per week, each project designed to bring out their creativity. Fire Arts Center, 520 South G Street, Arcata. 826-1445, www.fireartsarcata.com. (K-1220) DANCE CLASSES FOR KIDS. Eureka Recreation offers a variety of dance classes for kids ages 4-11 years , from Tiny Tutus Beginning Ballet I & II, So You Think You Can Dance, Fiesta Kids and more! Classes starting Jan. 7. Days & times vary by class. $20-30. Register online at www.eurekarecreation.com or call 441-4244 for more info. (K-0103) SOCCER AGES 2-7. Introduce your child to the sport of soccer! Learn & practice basic skills, such as dribbling, passing & ball control. Fri.s, beginning Jan. 11, time varies by age group. $30. Register online at www.eurekarecreation.com or call 441-4244 for more info. (K-0103) continued on next page Dance, Music, Theater, Film ONE-ON-ONE PIANO LESSONS. At Arcata Community Center. New to piano, want to refresh old skills? On-going time slots available Tues.s, 3-9 p.m., Wed.s & Thurs.s, 3-6 p.m. Just $10 per class. Call Arcata Recreation Division 822-7091 or visit www. cityofarcata.org (DMT-1220) DANCE WITH DEBBIE. Boost your confidence on the dance floor with private lessons. Gift certificates available, too. (707) 464-3638, firstname.lastname@example.org (DMT-0124) LEARN 2 HOOP DANCE. Foundational Hoop Dance series starts every few weeks in Arcata. Ongoing int/ adv. workshops. Private lessons. Hoops/collapsible hoops for sale. www.chakranation.com (DMT-1226) WEST AFRICAN DANCE. Tues.s, Thurs.s, 5:30-7 p.m., at Redwood Raks, Arcata. All levels welcome. Live drumming. Dulce, 832-9547, Christina, 498-0146. (DMT-0228) North Coast Improve your mind and body in a fun, intense workout, and a very chill environment. Adults & kids ages 8 and up. Contact Justin (707) 601-1657 Text or Phone. 1459 M. St. Arcata. email@example.com northcoastfencing.tripod.com Academy In Pat Robertson’s 1990 book, The New Millennium, April 29, 2007, was the day of Earth’s destruction. northcoastjournal.com • NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 20, 2012 39 Field notes continued from previous page Spiritual Artist’s impression of impAct 65 million yeArs Ago off present yucAtAn coAst, mexico. © WilliAm K. HArtmAnn, used WitH permission SHAMANIC RITUAL HEALING CIRCLE. CROSSING THE THRESHOLD INTO AQUARIUS. A welcome gathering with shrine building, shamanic journeying, prayer, drumming, etc.! For info call Scott Sherman 445-1018. Suggested donation $15-20 per participant. Sat., Dec. 22, 7:30-10 p.m. Red Barn, 409 Redmond Rd., Freshwater. shamanicvisionpsychotherapy.blogspot. com(S-1220) TAROT AS AN EVOLUTIONARY PATH. Beginners and more experienced readers class begins Jan. 2013. Free Introduction, Humboldt Herbals and Moonrise Herbs. Call Carolyn Ayres, 442-4240, or see schedules at www.tarotofbecoming.com. (S-1227) ARCATA ZEN GROUP MEDITATION. Beginners welcome. Sun., 8 a.m. North Coast Aikido Center, on F St. between 8th and 9th in Arcata. Wed., 6-7 p.m. at First Christian Church, 730 K, Eureka, ramp entrance and upstairs; newcomers please come 5 minutes early. Sun. contact, 826-1701. Wed. contact, barryevans9@ yahoo.com, or for more info. call (707) 826-1701. www. arcatazengroup.org. (S-1227) YOGA FOR CHILDBIRTH EDUCATION PROGRAM. Starting Jan 2013 at Om Shala Yoga. Ease into and celebrate your transition into parenthood with the guidance of experienced facilitators and the support of a nurturing community. Classes and workshops are designed to support you in each stage of pregnancy and beyond. No yoga experience required. Doulas and birth partners welcome. For more info contact program director Jodie DiMinno at (707) 616-0930. 858 10th St., Arcata. 825-YOGA (9642), www.omshalayoga.com (W-1220) T’AI CHI WITH MARGY EMERSON. Three programs: T’ai Chi for Back Pain and Arthritis, Traditional Long Form (Wu Style), and The 42 Combined Forms (all 4 major styles). 10-week session starts the week of Jan. 7. Begin as late as the third week. At the marital arts academy in Arcata’s Sunny Brae Shopping Center. Visit a class with no obligation to pay or enroll. Morning and evening classes. Fees for the 10-week term: $95 for 1 class per week, $155 for 2 or more classes per week. See www.margaretemerson.com or call 8226508 for schedules. (W-0110) DANDELION HERBAL CENTER. Classes with Jane Bothwell. HERBAL CLINIC CLASS. Jan. 14-April 15, 2013, Refine and expand your herbal counseling skills. BEGINNING WITH HERBS, Jan. 30-March 27, Eight Wed. evenings 7-9:30 p.m., plus 2 herb walks. 10 MONTH HERBAL STUDIES. Feb.-Nov. 2013. Meets one weekend per Month. PLANT LOVERS JOURNEY TO COSTA RICA with Jane Bothwell & Rosemary Gladstar, Nov. 14-23, 2013. Get in touch to be on the interested list. REGISTER:online at www.dandelionherb.com or call (707) 442-8157. (W-0110) NORTHWEST INSTITUTE OF AYURVEDA. Classes with Traci Webb and KP Khalsa. INTRODUCTION TO AYURVEDA, 3-Day Introductory Immersion. Jan 25-27, 2013. Learn to Balance Body and Mind using Doshas, Elements, Foods, Herbs, Essential Oils, Yoga, Meditation and Colors, $249. Serves as Prerequisite to 10-MONTH AYURVEDIC HERBALISM PROGRAM, Meets fourth weekend of month, Feb. 22-Nov. 17, 2013. Global Herbs, Ayurveda Therapeutics, Plant/ Mineral/Food Medicines, Formulating, Medicine Making Immersion, Herb Walk. REGISTER ON-LINE: www.ayurvedicliving.com, OR info@ayurvedicliving. com, (707) 601-9025. (W-0124) NEW CLIENTS $10 OFF. Myrtletowne Healing Center 1480, #A Myrtle Ave. A Hidden Gem on Myrtle Ave., specializing in therapeutic massage. We will assist you on your road to recovery or work with you on that chronic pain issue. Swedish, deep tissue, trigger point, reflexology, acupressure, uterine centering, lymph drainage, lomi lomi, and more. Founders Hilary Wakefield and Sarah Maier are both Doulas, we do pregnancy massage as well! You are worth it, call today (707) 441-9175 (W-1226) START YOUR CAREER IN MASSAGE THERAPY! Evening classes begin Jan. 22, 2013 at Arcata School of Massage. 650-Hour Therapeutic Massage Certification will prepare you for Professional Certification in California, and the National Exam. Our comprehensive program prepares your body, mind and heart to become a caring, confident professional massage therapist. Call 822-5223 for information or visit arcatamassage.com (W-1226) ● End of the World (Again) By Barry Evans firstname.lastname@example.org L ook on the bright side. When the world ends again this week, there’ll be no more fiscal cliff, no more prurient tales from the CIA/FBI/Army, no more global warming, no more wars in Iraq/Afghanistan/you-name-it, no more obesity epidemic — the pluses are endless. I’m not optimistic, however. When the world ended before, the problems didn’t go away, and now my faith in end-ofthe-world predictions is a bit jaded. Take this current go-round. It’s not even as if the poor Mayans predicted the end of the world (see Field Notes, Aug. 20, 2009). What they did predict (if that’s the word for it) is that their calendar would re-up exactly 1,872,000 days after it began on August 11 (or 13), 3114 BCE in our calendar. That’s this Friday (or Sunday). Which is no more remarkable than going from Dec. 31, 1999, to Jan. 1, 2000, when not only our world didn’t end (unless I’m really living in a fantasy), but computers kept running and traffic lights stayed working, despite predictions to the contrary. The last time the world really ended, without too much exaggeration, was that fateful day 65 million years ago when a Manhattan-Island-sized rock came roaring through our atmosphere with the kinetic energy of a billion Hiroshima-size bombs. Atmospheric dust from the impact quickly blanketed Earth’s surface, essentially shutting down photosynthesis for several years and causing the extinction of about half of Earth’s species, including just about all the dinosaurs except the ancestors of birds. That singular event had a happy ending for mammals, who suddenly found themselves lords of the land, filling the ecological “niches” in which dinosaurs previously thrived. If the space-rock had missed, no World Series, no latte, no Twitter. Just boring old T-Rex and his bros in the ’hood. The world will end, of course — nothing lasts forever — but the finale will probably be a drawn-out affair, T.S. Eliot’s “not with a bang, but a whimper.” In the long-term, when our star runs out of nuclear fuel some 5 billion years from now, this planet will be incinerated in the sun’s last-gasp hurrah. But, self-centered and chauvinistic as we are, we may want to focus on the end of our species, rather than on all Earthly life. We humans are pretty vulnerable to all manner of plagues, metaphorical and literal. For instance: The flu pandemic of 1919 wiped out about 40 million people, twice as many as the combatants had been able to kill off during the previous four years of WWI. One gnarly mutation of swine-flu, say, could do a similar number on us today. With nine countries (some of which aren’t exactly models of stability) possessing nuclear weapons, we could rather easily create a doomsday of our own making. When super-intelligent computers move from science-fiction to reality (no more than a few decades from now — some computer viruses already have “cockroach intelligence”), the game will really change. The new lords of the Earth may well see us an inferior, non-essential species, John Connor notwithstanding. I’ve already submitted my Dec. 27 column, so I guess I don’t think the world is going to end before the next issue of the Journal. Give us a few more generations, however, and I’m not so sanguine: Time really is running out for our kind. Maybe we should take another look at those Mayan stelae … l Barry Evans (email@example.com) will be celebrating the winter solstice at 3:12 a.m. PST on Dec. 21, end of the world or not. Sports/Recreation ADULT SPORTS LEAGUES. Blue Lake Parks & Recreation, At Prasch Hall, Blue Lake. Download registration forms at www.bluelake.ca.gov. Men’s Basketball, Jan. 9 – Feb. 20, Wed’s, 6,7,8 & 9 p.m., $400/team, Women’s Basketball, Jan. 7.-Feb. 18, Mon’s, 6,7,8 & 9 p.m., $350/team, Women’s Volleyball, Jan. 6.- April 7 , Sun’s, 9:30 a.m., 10:30 a.m., 11:30 a.m. & 12:30 p.m., $150/team. For more information, please call 6685932 (SR-0103) ROLLER SKATING. Blue Lake Parks & Recreation Fri./ Sat., 6:30-9:30 p.m., Sun. 2-5 p.m. Adult Skate: 2nd Sun. of every month, 6:30-9:30 p.m. To schedule birthday parties, call 668-5932 or find us on facebook at firstname.lastname@example.org. (SR-1226) Therapy/Support FREE DEPRESSION SUPPORT GROUP. Walk-in support group for anyone suffering from depression. Meet Mon.s 6:30 p.m -7:45 p.m, at the Church of the Joyful Healer, McKinleyville. Questions? Call (707) 839-5691. (T-1226) FREE GAMBLING TREATMENT. Call (707) 496-2856 Shawna Bell, LMFT, MFC #47122 www.norcalrecoveryservices.com. (T-1226) TYPE 1 DIABETIC SUPPORT GROUP. meeting the 3rd Tues. of each month, 6-7:30 p.m, at the Foundation of Medical Care, 3100 Edgewood Rd. Eureka.Contact 443-0124. (TS-0214) SEX/ PORN DAMAGING YOUR LIFE & RELATIONSHIPS ? Confidential help is available. saahumboldt@ yahoo.com or 845-8973 (T-1226) Wellness/Bodywork CHRISTMAS EVE HOLIDAY HATHA YOGA . With Artemisia Shine. At Om Shala Yoga. Mon., Dec. 24, 10:30 a.m.-Noon. $14 drop-in or use current class pass. 858 10th St., Arcata. 825-YOGA (9642), www. omshalayoga.com (W-1220) TUES. & THURS. AFTERNOON MASSAGE WITH DIANE DAVIS. Enhance your Pilates or yoga practice or just unwind and relax with a massage session at Arcata Core Pilates Studio! Nationally certified since 1997, Diane is trained in Hawaiian Lomi Lomi, Myofascial Release, Swedish, Craniosacral, Acupressure and Reiki. Questions? Call (707) 268-8926 to schedule an appointment. (W-1220) 40 NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 20, 2012 • northcoastjournal.com Various sources predict an interplanetary collision, alien invasion or a giant supernova on Dec. 21, 2012. NASA scientists disagree. 12/20, 12/27/2012, 1/3/2013, 1/10/2013 (12-349) YOU ARE IN DEFAULT UNDER A DEED OF TRUST DATED December 28, 2009, UNLESS YOU TAKE ACTION TO PROTECT YOUR PROPERTY, IT MAY BE SOLD AT A PUBLIC SALE. IF YOU NEED AN EXPLANATION OF THE NATURE OF THE PROCEEDINGS AGAINST YOU, YOU SHOULD CONTACT A LAWYER TS. NO.140662-AH ON December 27, 2012 at 10:00 o’clock A.M. in the lobby of Humboldt Land Title Company, 1034 Sixth St., Eureka, CA, County of Humboldt, State of California, HUMBOLDT LAND TITLE COMPANY, a Corporation, as Trustee under the Deed of Trust executed by Christopher William Trent as Trustee of the Christopher William Trent Living Trust dated October 30, 2009 recorded on January 11, 2010 as Instrument No. 2010-563-4 of Official Records in the office of the Recorder of Humboldt County, California by reason of default in the payment or performance of obligations secured thereby including the breach or default, notice of which was recorded February 2, 2012 as Instrument No. 2012-2633-3 of said Official Records, will sell at public auction to the highest bidder for cash in lawful money of the United States, without covenant or warranty, express or implied, as to title, possession, or encumbrances, for the purpose of paying obligations secured by said Deed of Trust, the interest conveyed to said Trustee by said Deed of Trust in property situated in the City of Eureka, County of Humboldt, State of California and described as: Beginning at the Southeast corner of Del Norte and Union Streets; thence South along Union Street, 55 feet; thence East parallel with Del Norte Street, 100 feet; thence North parallel with Union Street, 55 feet to Del Norte Street; thence West along Del Norte Street, 100.5 feet to the point of beginning. ASSESSOR’S PARCEL NO. 004-086-007-000. NOTICE TO POTENTIAL BIDDERS: If you are considering bidding on this property lien, you should understand that there are risks involved in bidding at a trustee auction. You will be bidding on a lien, not on the property itself. Placing the highest bid at a trustee auction does not automatically entitle you to free and clear ownership of the property. You should also be aware that the lien being auctioned off may be a junior lien. If you are the highest bidder at the auction, you are or may be responsible for paying off all liens senior to the lien being auctioned off, before you can receive clear title to the property. You are encouraged to investigate the existence, priority, and size of outstanding liens that may exist on this property by contacting the county recorder’s office or a NOTICE OF TRUSTEES SALE 12/6, 12/13, 12/20/2012 (12-331) The following person is doing business as SWEET BIRD BAKING COMPANY at 325 10TH Street, Unit A, Arcata, CA 95521. Kirsten Vogelsang 325 10th Street, Unit A Arcata, CA 95521 The business is conducted by An FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT 12-00693 12/13, 12/20, 12/27/2012, 1/3/2013 (12-345) legal NOTICES ➤ continued on next page Solution, tips and computer program at www.sudoku.com title insurance company, either of which may charge you a fee for this information. If you consult either of these resources, you should be aware that the same lender may hold more than one mortgage or deed of trust on the property. NOTICE TO PROPERTY OWNER: The sale date shown on this notice of sale may be postponed one or more times by the mortgagee, beneficiary, trustee, or a court, pursuant to Section 2924g of the California Civil Code. The law requires that information about trustee sale postponements be made available to you and to the public, as a courtesy to those not present at the sale. If you wish to learn whether your sale date has been postponed, and, if applicable, the rescheduled time and date for the sale of this property, you may call 707-4430837 for information regarding the trustee’s sale and inquire as to the status of the foreclosure using the T.S. number assigned to this foreclosure shown on the first page of this notice. Information about postponements that are very short in duration or that occur close in time to the scheduled sale may not immediately be reflected in the telephone information. The best way to verify postponement information is to attend the scheduled sale. The unpaid balance and estimate of costs, expenses and advances as of November 20, 2012 is $67,551.62; said amount will increase until date of sale. The street address or other common designation, if any, of the real property described herein is purported to be: 325 W. Del Norte, Eureka, CA 95501 The undersigned Trustee disclaims any liability for any incorrectness of the street address or other common designation, if any, shown herein. Dated: November 20, 2012, Beneficiary: George Owren and Gail Owren Telephone: 707-443-6587 Address: P.O. Box 3400 Eureka, CA 95502 HUMBOLDT LAND TITLE COMPANY a Corporation, Trustee Address: 1034 Sixth Street Eureka, CA 95501 Telephone: (707) 443-0837. By: /s/ Sue E. Bosch, President The following person is doing business as REDWOOD CURTAIN LIVE at 3614 Pennsylvania Ave., Eureka, CA 95501. Daniel Deluhery 3614 Pennsylvania Ave. Eureka, CA 95501 The business is conducted by An Individual. The registrant commenced to transact business under the fictitious business name listed above on 12/1/2012. /s Dan Deluhery. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Humboldt County on December 3, 2012. CAROLYN CRNICH Humboldt County Clerk 12/20, 12/27/2012, 1/3/2013, 1/10/2013 (12-348) FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT 12-00701 CROSSWORD By David Levinson Wilk Individual. The registrant commenced to transact business under the fictitious business name listed above on n/a. /s Kirsten Vogelsang. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Humboldt County on November 27, 2012. CAROLYN CRNICH Humboldt County Clerk ©2012 DAVID LEVINSON WILK ANSWERS NEXT WEEK! ACROSS 1. Tiger ____ 4. QB’s scores 7. Blackjack decision 10. Stock ticker symbol for Barnes & Noble 13. “... man ____ mouse?” 14. Vote of approval 15. Suffix with Milan 16. “106 & Park” network 17. Autobiography of a short-tempered person? 19. Bagel topping 20. Boxer’s warning? 21. Coagulate, as blood 22. Some radio stations 23. Vibes 24. English county’s treat for a tabby? 27. Not even cracked 28. Columbian painter Fernando 29. ____ kiss 30. Maker of ShowHouse faucets 32. “I’m not listening ...” 36. Taking shots at St. Louis’ NHL team from afar? 39. Raspy 40. Small bouquet 41. Word after waste or want 42. 1994 movie based on an “SNL” skit 44. “Pay ____ mind” 45. Girls in Manitoba’s capital city? 50. Tweak some text 51. Chemical in drain cleaners 52. Prepare for planting 12. Banjo accessory 18. “How could ____ this happen?” 22. Headline locale 23. Coral Sea sight 24. Slacks material 25. “____ to differ” 26. Short story in James Joyce’s “Dubliners” 27. Obi, e.g. 30. El ____ (Peruvian volcano) 31. It’s to the left of a decimal 33. “Oklahoma!” role 34. Trotsky and Uris 35. Regarding 53. Yellowstone animal 54. He said “Learn from the masses, and then teach them” 55. Public wardrobe malfunction that exposes a certain body part (as in 17-, 24-, 36- and 45-Across) 58. Ruby of “A Raisin in the Sun” 59. Leaf-turning time: Abbr. 60. I love, to Luis 61. Tide rival 62. Fabric amts. 63. Pint-size 64. Farthest-right bowling pin 65. Managed The following person is doing business as SCOOTER’S LANDSCAPING AND FIREWOOD at 2055 Lewis Ave., Arcata, CA 95521, P.O. Box 1006, Arcata, CA 95518. Tyler David Binion 2055 Lewis Ave. Arcata, CA 95521 The business is conducted by An Individual. The registrant commenced to transact business under the fictitious business name listed above on 12/10/2012. /s Tyler Binion. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Humboldt County on December 10, 2012. CAROLYN CRNICH Humboldt County Clerk 12/20, 12/27/2012, 1/3/2013, 1/10/2013 (12-347) FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT 12-00715 The following person is doing business as OMSBERG & PRESTON at 434 7th Street, Suite B, Eureka, CA 95501. Kimberly Denise Preston 841 13th Street Fortuna, CA 95540 The business is conducted by An Individual. The registrant commenced to transact business under the fictitious business name listed above on 1/1/2008. /s Kimberly D. Preston. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Humboldt County on December 3, 2012. CAROLYN CRNICH Humboldt County Clerk FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT 12-00704 DOWN 1. “You can’t mean little ol’ me?” 2. They may have you in stitches, in brief 3. Northeast China region 4. Thit and thas? 5. Sonar’s measurement 6. Utter 7. Batter’s need 8. ____ triangle 9. ____-Mex 10. Requested gift in “A Christmas Story” 11. 1996 Olympic gymnast Strug 37. It may be fine 38. Landford Wilson’s “The ____ Baltimore” 43. Narc’s find, maybe 44. Cruise stops: Abbr. 45. Like an untended garden 46. Sat 47. Air Jordans, e.g. 48. Grisham’s “____ to Kill” 49. Nurse 54. Cut 55. D.C. baseballer 56. A Gershwin 57. Put down in writing? MEDIUM #9 LAST WEEK’S ANSWERS An opinion on the Talmud in Orthodox Judaism, the Messiah should come within 6,000 years from the creation of Adam. northcoastjournal.com • North Coast Journal • Thursday, Dec. 20, 2012 41 CONTINUED FROM PREVIOUS PAGE. FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT 12-00706 Box 461, Trinidad, CA 95570. Alan J. Grau & Leslie A. Farrar Family Trust 433 Ewing St. Trinidad, CA 95570 The business is conducted by A Trust. The registrant commenced to transact business under the fictitious business name listed above on 11/13/2012. /s Alan J. Grau, Trustee. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Humboldt County on November 14, 2012. CAROLYN CRNICH Humboldt County Clerk 12/6, 12/13, 12/20, 12/27/2012 (12-339) The following person is doing business as FORBES & ASSOCIATES ERIC CECCHIN at 1807 Central Ave., McKinleyvillle, CA 95519. Eric Cecchin 777 Frontage Road Trinidad, CA 95570 The business is conducted by An Individual. The registrant commenced to transact business under the fictitious business name listed above on 12/03/12. /s Eric Cecchin. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Humboldt County on December 3, 2012. CAROLYN CRNICH Humboldt County Clerk 12/13, 12/20, 12/27/2012, 1/3/2013 (12-342) Pleasanton, CA 94566 Kent H. Pryor 3425 Bernal Avenue Pleasanton, CA 94566 The business is conducted by A General Partnership. The registrant commenced to transact business under the fictitious business name listed above on n/a. /s Alfred K. Abrahamsen. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Humboldt County on November 29, 2012. CAROLYN CRNICH Humboldt County Clerk 12/6, 12/13, 12/20, 12/27/2012 (12-340) The following person is doing business as SCHILL ART STUDIO & GALLERY at 1649 Main Street, Fortuna, CA 95540, P.O. Box 833, Fortuna, CA 95540. Monica Lynne Schill P.O. Box 177 / 27972 Hwy 36 Bridgeville, CA 95526 The business is conducted by An Individual. The registrant commenced to transact business under the fictitious business name listed above on 1/1/2013. /s Monica Schill. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Humboldt County on December 5, 2012. CAROLYN CRNICH Humboldt County Clerk 12/13, 12/20, 12/27/2012, 1/3/2013 (12-343) FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT 12-00709 The following person is doing business as REJOYCE - DESIGNS at 410 Ackerman Lane, Carlotta, Ca 95528. Joyce M. Thurman 410 Ackerman Lane Carlotta, CA 95528 The business is conducted by An Individual. The registrant commenced to transact business under the fictitious business name listed above on 11/26/12. /s Joyce M. Thurman. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Humboldt County on November 26, 2012. CAROLYN CRNICH Humboldt County Clerk 12/6, 12/13, 12/20, 12/27/2012 (12-336) FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT 12-00690 The following persons are doing business as EUREKAN APARTMENTS at 2839 F Street, Eureka, CA 95501. Alfred K. Abrahamsen 4400 Cedar Street Eureka, CA 95503 Alice S. Pryor 3425 Bernal Avenue Pleasanton, CA 94566 The business is conducted by A General Partnership. The registrant commenced to transact business under the fictitious business name listed above on n/a. /s Alfred K. Abrahamsen. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Humboldt County on November 29, 2012. CAROLYN CRNICH Humboldt County Clerk 12/6, 12/13, 12/20, 12/27/2012 (12-341) FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT 12-00700 The following person is doing business as NORTH COAST LAUNDRIES at 128 Grange Road, Eureka, CA 95503. Lola Marlene Moore 128 Grange Road Eureka, CA 95503 The business is conducted by An Individual. The registrant commenced to transact business under the fictitious business name listed above on n/a. /s Lola Marlene Moore. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Humboldt County on December 10, 2012. CAROLYN CRNICH Humboldt County Clerk 12/13, 12/20, 12/27/2012, 1/3/2013 (12-346) FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT 12-00714 The following person is doing business as ROCKN IT at 497 Howard Heights Rd., Eureka, CA 95503. Nicolas Tweedie 497 Howard Heights Rd. Eureka, CA 95503 The business is conducted by An Individual. The registrant commenced to transact business under the fictitious business name listed above on 11/01/2012. /s Nicolas Tweedie. This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Humboldt County on November 27, 2012. CAROLYN CRNICH Humboldt County Clerk 12/6, 12/13, 12/20, 12/27/2012 (12-337) FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT 12-00694 To all heirs, beneficiaries, creditors, contingent creditors and persons who may otherwise be interested in the will or estate, or both, of: THOMAS KEITH BUTTE, also known as THOMAS K. BUTTE A PETITION FOR PROBATE has been filed by SARAH JEAN OLIVER in the Superior Court of California, County of Humboldt. THE PETITION FOR PROBATE requests that SARAH JEAN OLIVER be appointed as personal representative to administer the estate of the decedent. THE PETITION requests the decedent’s will and codicils, if any, be admitted to probate. The will and any NOTICE OF PETITION TO ADMINISTER ESTATE OF THOMAS KEITH BUTTE, ALSO KNOWN AS THOMAS K. BUTTE CASE NO. PR120296 codicils are available for examination in the file kept by court. THE PETITION requests authority to administer the estate under the Independent Administration of Estates Act. (This authority will allow the personal representative to take many actions without obtaining court approval. Before taking certain very important actions, however, the personal representative will be required to give notice to interested persons unless they have waived notice or consented to the proposed action.) The independent administration authority will be granted unless an interested person files an objection to the petition and shows good cause why the court should not grant the authority. A HEARING on the petition will be held on January 3, 2013 at 1:50 p.m. at the Superior Court of California, County of Humboldt, 825 Fifth Street, Eureka, in Dept. 8. IF YOU OBJECT to the granting of the petition, you should appear at the hearing and state your objections or file written objections with the court before the hearing. Your appearance may be in person or by your attorney. IF YOU ARE A CREDITOR or a contingent creditor of the deceased, you must file your claim with the court and mail a copy to the personal representative appointed by the court within four months from the date of first issuance of letters as provided in Probate Code Section 9100. The time for filing claims will not expire before four months from the hearing date noticed above. YOU MAY EXAMINE the file kept by the court. If you are a person interested in the estate, you may file with the court a Request for Special Notice (form DE-154) of the filing of an inventory and appraisal of estate assets or of any petition or account as provided in Probate Code section 1250. A Request for Special Notice form is available from the court clerk. ATTORNEY FOR PETI TIONER: CATHERINE M. KOSHKIN, CSB #149503 KOSHKIN LAW FIRM 1116 ELEVENTH STREET ARCATA, CA 95521 (707) 822-2800 DECEMBER 6, 2012 SUPERIOR COURT OF CALIFORNIA COUNTY OF HUMBOLDT 12/13, 12/20, 12/27/2012 (12-344) Employment CADD Drafting Position Looking for qualified professionals that have 3D modeling experience and motivated to excel at a fast paced growing company in Arcata. Responsibilities include 3D modeling and drafting using SolidWorks 2010, knowledge of ANSI Y14.5 drafting practices and standards, metric system units, as well as the ability to accurately reverse engineer/model and make minor changes to existing SolidWorks Part, Assembly and Drawing files. Understanding of how to create tables on drawings using data from a Part/Assembly files. Create clean and clearly readable Drawings. Ability to adapt to specific standards. A general understanding of what is required on engineering drawings for a manufacturing environment. Competitive wages, 401k plan, personal time, holiday pay and Blue Shield insurance. Please send Resume to HR@tomasjewelry.com by 12/20/2012 Sales Analyst Dynamic and growing wholesale jewelry company seeks a highly motivated person with strong analytical skills to join our growing Sales team. Responsible for assisting the account manager in the Specialty Channel in delivering analytics that will help drive and improve business including sales forecasts and providing assistance in implementing sales strategy. Requires Intermediate to Advanced Excel, 2 yrs related experience or business degree plus strong analytical, quantitative skills and communication skills. Competitive wages, 401k plan, personal time, holiday pay and Blue Shield insurance. Please send resume to email@example.com by 12/14/2012 Project Management A unique opportunity to work locally as a Project Manager in a fast paced International Manufacturing-Wholesale Company. We are looking for someone to join our team that is analytical, organized, has great communication skills, can facilitate meetings and discussions, has creative problem solving skills, and can work through difficult issues. Successful candidate will be self motivated and team oriented. Must have a proven ability to keep team members focused on top priorities as those priorities shift and change. Competitive wages, 401k plan, personal time, holiday pay and Blue Shield insurance. Please send resume to firstname.lastname@example.org by 12/14/2012 Carriage Business for Sale The following persons are doing business as AUDIO WAVES at 433 Ewing Street, Trinidad, CA 95570, P.O. FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT 12-00673 The following persons are doing business as APA ENTERPRISES at 2839 F Street, Eureka, CA 95501. Alfred K. Abrahamsen 4400 Cedar Street Eureka, CA 95503 Alice S. Pryor 3425 Bernal Avenue FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT 12-00699 Old Town Carriage Co. has been in operation since 1989. Sale includeS: • 2009 Troyer built anderson Vis-à-vis • Two traffic safe Percheron draft horses • 1994 chevy ¾ ton pick-up truck • 20ft. Gooseneck trailer • all harness, equipment, misc. supplies • Transfer of license, permits, insurance • Thorough training, consulting included This is an outstanding opportunity if you like horses and want to have a thriving business in a welcoming community that supports and appreciates your efforts. Price: $32,000. Call 707-601-3638 or email email@example.com Coast Journal JourNal••Thursday, thursday, deC. 20, 2012 • northcoastjournal.com Dec. 20, 2012 • northcoastjournal.com 42 North Coast According to Rashad Khalifa’s research on the Quran Code, the world will end in 2280. the CONTINUED ON next page Employment Costing Accounting I Dynamic and growing wholesale jewelry company seeks a motivated person with strong analytical skills to join our growing Finance team based in Arcata, Ca. Responsible for the delivery of costing estimates of new products, monitoring costs, note exceptions, provide appropriate variance reporting to other departments and management. This position requires BS degree, Intermediate Excel, and strong analytical and quantitative skills. 14 W. Wabash Ave. Eureka, CA 268-1866 eurekaca.expresspros.com Smog Tech Master Mechanic Carpenters • Laborers CPA • Pharmacy Tech Now Hiring: Competitive wages, 401k plan, personal time, holiday pay and Blue Shield insurance. Please send resume to firstname.lastname@example.org by 12/14/2012 Auto Service Writer • Auto Tech Pharmacy Reception • Pharmacy Tech Insurance Sales/Manager Print Shop Admin. • Remodeling Tech Director of Sales General Manager Media $ 2,406 - $3,088 monthly plus benefits Nutrition Aide County of Humboldt 707.445.9641 www.sequoiapersonnel.com 2930 E Street Eureka, CA 95501 Under general supervision, provides basic nutritional evaluation and counseling to participants in prenatal, infant and child health programs; provides office support to nutritional programs; performs related work as assigned. Must possess a valid California driver's license. Filing deadline: January 3, 2013. California MENTOR is seeking committed people willing to share their home with an adult with developmental disabilities. We are seeking Mentors who have experience with insulin dependent diabetics & live in the McKinleyville/Arcata area. We offer a competitive monthly stipend & 24 hour support. Call Jamie at (707) 442-4500 ext. 14. Apply at www.co.humboldt.ca.us or pick up an application at Humboldt County Personnel 825 5th St. Rm. 100, Eureka. AA/EOE CHER-AE HEIGHTS CASINO PART-TIME POSITIONS Gift Shop (Candy Cart) Janitorial Crown Club Representative Deli Worker Busser/Host, (Sunset) Vault Attendant Security, 2 Slot Attendant FULL-TIME POSITIONS Slot Manager SEASCAPE Dock Workers, PT TRIBAL OPERATIONS Member Services Intake Worker - On Call Animal Control Ofﬁcer, PT Cher-Ae Heights Indian Community of the Trinidad Rancheria Employments Applications available in Human Resources/ Seascape/ Cher-Ae Heights Casino or our website at www.cheraeheightscasino.com Cher-Ae Heights is an alcohol and drug free workplace with required testing. Open Door is seeking the following medical professionals: CASE MANAGER 1 F/T Eureka RN CLINIC COORDINATOR 1 F/T Crescent City DIRECTOR OF NURSES 1 F/T Arcata MEDICAL ASSISTANT 1 F/T Crescent City, 1 F/T Willow Creek, 1 F/T Eureka Call (707) 826-8633 ext 5140 Visit www.opendoorhealth.com AIRLINE CAREERS. Begin here Become an Aviation Maintenance Tech. FAA approved training. Financial assistance available. Job placement assistance. Call Aviation Institute of Maintenance 888-242-3214. (E-1220) CONTROLLER. Humboldt Area Foundation seeking experienced Controller/Sr Accountant. Responsible for financial reports, budgets, tax reporting and supervising Finance department positions. Complete description at www.hafoundation.org. Email email@example.com (E-1220) PROGRAMMER POOL (JOB #1164) P/T, temporary, pool position in Information Technology Services. Review: 1/4/2013. For more info visit: www.humboldt. edu/jobs or call 707-826-3626. HSU is an ADA/Title IX/EOE (E-1227) HOME CAREGIVERS PT/FT. Nonmedical caregivers to assist elderly in their homes. Top hourly fees. 442-8001. (E-1226) CORRECTIONAL COOK $2430 - $3119 mo. plus benefits Prepares meals in the County Jail according to established guidelines; maintains records of food and supplies; directs inmates in food preparation and portioning. Skill in preparing meals in a high volume institutional setting is required. Two years exp. in large scale institutional cooking is desirable. Must work flexible, rotating shifts including weekends. A detailed background investigation is required. Filing deadline: January 2, 2013 For application come to Human Resources, Humboldt County Courthouse, 825 Fifth St., Eureka or apply online at www.co.humboldt.ca.us/jobs Jobline: (707) 476-2357 AA/EOE County of Humboldt NANNY NEEDED FOR EUREKA FAMILY. Young, professional couple with 2 children seeks part-time nanny to work Mon., Tue., Thu. & Fri., 7-9 a.m., & 1:30-5:30 p.m. Prior experience, clean driving record, proof of insurance and reliable with great child skills a must! Email qualifications to kidsfirst707@ gmail.com (E-1220) CUSTOMER SERVICE/FLOOR MANAGER. Chautauqua Natural Foods is looking for a person with customer service experience and knowledge of natural and organic products for it’s new Garberville store opening in Dec. 2012, Contact Peg (707) 923-2636. (E-1227) CALIFORNIA MENTOR. Is seeking committed people willing to share their home with an adult with developmental disabilities. We are seeking Mentors who have experience with insulin dependent diabetics & live in the McKinleyville/Arcata area. We offer a competitive monthly stipend & 24 hour support. Call Jamie at (707) 442-4500 ext. 14. (E-1226) HELP WANTED!!! Extra income! Mailing Brochures from home! Free supplies! Genuine opportunity! No experience required. Start immediately! www. mailingcentral.net (AAN CAN) (E-0228) your ideal employee may be a Journal reader. 442-1400 VISA/ MC. Place your ad onlinle at www. northcoastjournal.com TAXICAB DRIVERS, PT & FT. CAE Transport. Various shifts, 24/7. Starting $8.00/hour + gratuities. 21+ & clean driving record required. Print CAE Application: www.cityambulance. com and send with cover letter to: firstname.lastname@example.org or mail: 135 W. 7th St., Eureka, CA 95501. (E-1220) OPENINGS AVAILABLE. Part Time & On-Call Mental Health Aides, Dietary Aides, Housekeepers. Needed for Mental Health Rehabilitation Center. Apply at Crestwood Behavioral Health, 2370 Buhne St, Eureka. (E-0110) AIRLINE CAREERS. Become an Aviation Maintenance Tech. FAA approved training. Financial aid if qualified, Housing available. Job placement assistance. CALL Aviation Institute of Maintenance 877-492-3059. (AAN CAN) (E-1220) EARN $500 A DAY. Airbrush & Media Makeup Artists. For: Ads TV Film Fashion. Train & Build Portfolio in 1 week. Lower Tuition for 2012. AwardMakeupSchool. com (AAN CAN) (E-1220) $$$HELP WANTED$$$ Extra Income! Assembling CD cases from Home! No Experience Necessary! Call our Live Operators Now! 1-800405-7619 EXT 2450 http://www. easywork-greatpay.com (E-1220) CHINESE LANGUAGE TEACHER. Humboldt County Chinese School is looking for experienced Chinese Language teachers for beginning and intermediate youth classes, Feb./Mar. 2013. Contact Bernie Levy (707) 445-1781 or levyb@ eurekacityschools.org for more information. (E-1227) Place your ad online in the Marketplace at www.northcoastjournal.com. 442-1400 VISA/MC. Rentals ARCATA 3BD/1BA HOUSE. Lincoln Ave., Close to HSU. Garage, W/D. $1450/month, lease or mtm, deposit required. Available Jan. 7. No smoking/pets/party/growing. (707) 499-7942. (R-1220) EUREKA 2BD/1.5BA TOWNHOUSE. 1265 Haven Ln. #A. W/S/G Pd. Sec 8 range, refridg, dw, yard, w/c pet. Rent $750. Vac 01/01. www.ppmrentals.com, Rental hotline (707) 444-9197. (R-1220) EUREKA HOUSEMATE . For 2BD/1BA furnished 2nd floor seniors apartment in the Meadows. $450/month, $70/utilities, $500/ deposit. Lease. Must be 42 or older. (707) 672-4096. (R-1213) Openings soon available for HUD Sec. 8 Waiting Lists for 2, 3 & 4 bedrm apts. Annual Income Limits: 1 pers. $20,300; 2 pers. $23,200; 3 pers. $26,100; 4 pers. $28,950; 5 pers. $31,300; 6 pers. $33,600; 7 pers. $35,900; 8 pers. $38,250. HUMBOLDT PLAZA APTS. EHO. Hearing impaired: TDD Ph# 1-800-735-2922. Apply at Office: 2575 Alliance Rd. Arcata, 8am-12pm & 1-4pm, M-F (707) 822-4104 ▼ The level of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere will drop, making Earth uninhabitable in about 500 million years. northcoastjournal.com • North Coast Journal • Thursday, Dec. 20, 2012 43 the Rentals EUREKA STUDIO APARTMENT. 309 E St. #8. W/S/G Pd. Section 8 OK. w/c cat. Rent $470. Vac 12/27. www.ppmrentals.com, Rental hotline (707) 444-9197. (R-1220) LOLETA ROOM FOR RENT. $500/ month, $300/deposit, 1/2 utilities. Room available in newly renovated home. Pets considered. 362-6553. (R-1220) EUREKA 2BD/1.5BA TOWNHOUSE. 1285 Haven Ln., #3. W/S/G Pd. Sec 8. Range, refridg, dw, yard, w/c pet. Rent $750. Vac 12/01. www.ppmrentals.com, Rental hotline (707) 444-9197. (R-1220) EUREKA STUDIO APARTMENTS. 1140 E St., #26 & #32. W/S/G/Pd. Sec 8, range, refridg, w/c cat. Rent $515. Vac 12/08. www.ppmrentals. com, Rental hotline (707) 444-9197. (R-1220) MCKINLEYVILLE LARGE 4BD/2BA HOUSE. Garage, Newer Paint, Carpet, All Appliances, Covered Patio, Shed, Fully Fenced Yard, $1450/mo. CBC Pacific Partners Property Management (707) 4411315 (R-1220) HO HO HO HOLIDAY SPECIAL. First months rent free. Great 1BD apartments. $725. Kramer Investment Corporation. Close to HSU, parking and laundry. (707) 4442919, www.kkramer.com. (R-1227) EUREKA 3BD/1BA HOUSE. 3395 Trinity. Refridgerator, Lg Yard, Hookups. MtM W/C Pet. Rent $1200. Vac Now. www.ppmrentals. com, Rental hotline (707) 444-9197. (R-1220) NOW ACCEPTING APPLICATIONS. Plaza Point Apartments, 977 8th St., Arcata. 1 & 2 bedroom apartments and also apartments with special design features for individuals with a disability. Inquire as to the availability of rental subsidy. Must be 62 years of age or older; or disabled, regardless of age. Call (707) 822-2770, Mon.-Fri., 8 a.m.-1 p.m. TDD #1-800-735-2929. We are an equal opportunity provider and employer. EQUAL HOUSING OPPORTUNITY. EQUAL OPPORTUNITY ACCESS. (R-0103) ELK RIVER 2900 SF 5BD HOME. No pets. Call for Details. 443-2246. (R-1227) EUREKA 2BD/1BA APARTMENT. 230 Wabash Ave., Apt. #5. W/S/G Pd. Rent $645. Section 8 OK. Cat OK, Vac 12/3. www.ppmrentals. com, Rental hotline (707) 4449197. (R-1220) ARCATA CLEAN 1BD HOUSE. No growing, no illegal drugs, no smoking, no pets. References Required. $840/month plus deposit. (707) 822-7471. (R-1220) ALL AREAS-ROOMMATES.COM. ROOMMATES.COM. Browse hundreds of online listings with photos and maps. Find your roommate with a click of the mouse! Visit: http://www.Roommates. com. (AAN CAN) (R-0620) ▼ Real Estate Business Rentals Lodging/Travel DOWNTOWN EUREKA OFFICE SPACE AVAILABLE. Close to Courthouse. Call 443-2246 for sizes and pricing. (BR-1227) RETAIL & OFFICE SPACE AVAILABLE. In historic Jacoby’s Storehouse. Call 826-2426. (BR-0103) DANCE STUDIO RENTAL. Humboldt Capoeira Academy offers rental space for the performing arts, beautiful 2800 sq. f.t dance space offers hardwood floors, wall-to wall windows, full length mirrors, and dressing rooms. Convenient location is visible from the plaza, and will help you to promote your classes. Check with us for rates and availability. Contact Sarara at (707) 498-6155, or email@example.com. (BR-1226) njoy a holiday hide-a-way in charming cabins nestled beneath the Trinity Alps. Perfect for snowshoeing, crosscountry skiing or just relax in peaceful seclusion. CONTINUED FROM PAGE 43 Buy/Sell/Trade in O ION CAT own ld T NEW LO WILLOW CREEK PROPERTY. 1.33 acres, Willow Creek Community Service District Water, underground power & phone at property. R-2 soils report and perk tested. Approved septic system design by Trinity Engineering. Property is zoned RST. Property is located off Highway 299 on private road one mile east of Willow Creek. Ready to build. $99,900 will consider offers. (530) 629-2031 (RE-1227) Auto YOUR ROCKCHIP IS MY EMERGENCY! Glaswelder, Mobile, windshield repair. 442-GLAS, Humboldtwindshieldrepair.com (A-1227) 616 Second St. Old Town Eureka 707.443.7017 firstname.lastname@example.org Buy/Sell/Trade ALL CHRISTMAS & HOLIDAY ITEMS 1/2 PRICE! Blue Tagged Clothes only 25¢ each! Dec. 1822. Dream Quest Thrift Store in Willow Creek. Shop & Support our Youth. (BST-1220) TEMPUR-PEDIC FOR SALE. California King Tempur-Pedic mattress and box springs. This is the BellaSonna model and is about two years old. Entire set is in like new condition. This mattress is medium to firm support. Originally sold for approx. $5,000, selling for $2,000. Injuries from a recent accident are forcing us into a softer mattress. Text message to 845-4698 only. Available to view in the evenings. (BST-1227) THE BEAD LADY. For all your needs in beads! Glass beads, leather, shells, findings, jewelry. Kathy Chase Owner, 76 Country Club Dr. Ste. 5, Willow Creek. (530) 629-3540. krchase@yahoo. com. (BST-1226) IT’S FIREWOOD TIME! Alder, Douglas Fir, Juniper, Madrone (sometimes), Oak, Pepperwood, & Kindling. Call for current availability. We can deliver. Almquist Lumber Company, Boyd Road, Arcata. Open 7 days a week. Stop by or call; (707) 825-8880 (BST-0328) FLASHBACK 116 W. Wabash 443-3259 Approx. 1-6 Closed Tues. SALE: SELECT SWEATERS Real Estate EUREKA FLORIST FOR SALE. $169,000, Plus inventory. Priced for quick sale. Turnkey, will train. 443-4811, eurekaflorist. net. (RE-1220) Place your ad online in the Marketplace at www.northcoastjournal.com. 442-1400 VISA/MC. VACATION RENTAL. King Range, Great for family gatherings, workshops, small events, solar powered, easy access, handicap friendly. min. 3 nights www. chemisemountainretreat.com, 986-7794. (L-0124) Auto CASH FOR CARS. Any Car/Truck. Running or Not! Top Dollar Paid. We Come To You! Call For Instant Offer: 1-888-420-3808 www.cash4car.com (AAN CAN) (A-0404) PUBLIC AUCTION THURS. DEC. 27 5:45 PM Special sports memorabilia lot from Sports Bar closing, estate furniture + additions. TH Vintage Clothing Furniture, Housewares & more! THE CLOTHING DOCK & K STREET ANNEX Pets WOOF DEDOO PET WASTE REMOVAL SERVICE. Don’t do it, let us dedoo it! www.woofdedoo. com (P-0124) 11th & K Streets, Arcata 822-8288 Check out the listings on page 47 PLACE YOUR AUTO AD! BIG SALE! k real Journal estate • Thursday, Dec. 20, 2012 • northcoastjournal.com 44 North Coast or online @ www.northcoastjournal.com this week real estate Info & Pictures at WWW.CARLJOHNSONCO.COM Preview Weds. 11-5, Thurs. 11 on PLACE YOUR PET AD! ADVANCE NOTICE: NEXT AUCTION THURS. JAN. 10TH 5:45 PM 20 words and a photo, IN FULL COLOR for only $25 per week! Call 442-1400 or e-mail email@example.com Estate furniture and household misc. + additions 3950 Jacobs Ave. Eureka • 443-4851 20 words and a photo, IN FULL COLOR for only $25 per week! Call 442-1400 or e-mail classiﬁed@northcoastjournal.com In about 5 billion years, our Sun will swell into a red giant, either swallowing the Earth or at least completely scorching it. CONTINUED ON PAGE 46 Services Accepting New Clients General Practice Occupational Medicine 707.497.6342 1915 Harrison Ave., Suite A • Eureka Music Paul Windham, M.D. New manager? Co-worker problems? Personnel issues? Office politics? Achieve Your Professional Potential with a Business Coach Louisa Rogers firstname.lastname@example.org louisarogers.vpweb.com ALLIANCE LAWN & GARDEN CARE. Affordable, Dependable, and Motivated Yard maintenance. We’ll take care of all your basic lawn and garden needs. Including hedging, trimming, mowing, and hauling. Call for estimates (707) 834-9155, (707) 825-1082. (S-0228) Community AR C ATA F IR S T B AP T I S T CHURCH INVITES YOU. To join us for our Christmas worship services. Sun. morning Dec. 23 we gather for worship in song and in the Scriptures at 10:15 a.m. On Christmas Eve at 7 p.m., we gather for a candlelight communion service with joyful worship and a devotional message. All are welcome. 1700 Union St., Arcata, next to HSU’s new physical education complex. Please call us at 822-0367 if you have any questions. (C-1220) BE YOURSELF. Participants find their unique attributes and put them to use at LifetreeCafe this week, Sun. Dec., 30, 7 p.m. 76 13th St., Arcata. 672-2919, www. campbellcreek.org for more info. (C-1227) ATTEND COLLEGE ONLINE. from Home. *Medical, *Business, *Criminal Justice,*Hospitality. Job placement assistance. Computer available. Financial Aid if qualified. SCHEV authorized. Call 800-481-9472 www.CenturaOnline.com (AAN CAN) (C-1220) SEX/ PORN DAMAGING YOUR LIFE & RELATIONSHIPS ? Confidential help is available. email@example.com or 8458973 (C-1226) PREGNANT? CONSIDERING ADOPTION? Talk with caring agency specializing in matching Birthmothers with Families nationwide. LIVING EXPENSES PAID. Call 24/7 Abby’s One True Gift Adoptions 866-413-6293 (Void in Illinois) (AAN CAN) (C-1220) BECOME A FOSTER PARENT. Provide a safe and stable environment for youth 13-18 for them to learn and grow in their own community. Contact the Humboldt County Department of Health and Human Services Foster Care Hotline at 441-5013 and ask for Peggy. (C-0124) PIERCE’S COMPLETE ORCHARD CARE. Professional fruit tree pruning and orchard maintenance. Andrew Pierce (707) 672-4398. (S-0228) SEABREEZE CLEANING CO. Office & Rentals, Licensed & Bonded (707) 834-2898 (S-0131) ST I TC H ES - N - B RI TC H ES I N MCKINLEYVILLE. Kristin Anderson, Seamstress. Mending, Alterations, Custom Sewing. Mon.-Fri., 8 a.m.-3 p.m. Bella Vista Plaza, Suite 8A, McKinleyville. (707) 5025294. Facebook: Kristin Anderson’s Stitches-n-Britches. Kristin360cedar@gmail.com (S-0131) BOUDOIR PHOTOGRAPHY. By Venus & Aphrodite, Classy to sassy, comfort and privacy guaranteed. $40 fall special. 223-4172. (S-0110) AIR-SOURCE HEAT PUMPS. Use solar energy to heat your home, a proven technology, reasonably priced, Sunlight Heating-CA lic. #972834. firstname.lastname@example.org, (707) 502-1289 (S-1220) CREATIVE WRITING COACH/ EDITOR Nurturing, collaborative editing and creative coaching will make your work shine. All styles welcome. C.Baku, MFA. www. carlabaku.com. (S-0207) HELICOPTER FLIGHT LESSONS/ SCENIC TOURS. Redwood Coast Helicopters, based in Humboldt County. Whatever your helicopter needs, we will accommodate you! $160/hour. email@example.com (S-0214) TAI CHI GARDENER. Maintaining balance in your yard. Well equipt. Maintenance + Projects 18 yrs experience. Call Orion 825-8074, taichigardener.com. (S-1226) REACH 5 MILLION. hip, forwardthinking consumers across the U.S. When you advertise in alternative newspapers, you become part of the local scene and gain access to an audience you won’t reach anywhere else. http:// www.altweeklies.com/ads (AAN CAN) (S-0124) CLARITY WINDOW CLEANING. Services available. Call Julie 8391518. (S-1227) WRITING CONSULTANT/EDITOR. Fiction, nonfiction, poetry. Dan Levinson, MA, MFA. 443-8373. www.ZevLev.com. (S-1226) 2 GUYS & A TRUCK. Carpentry, Landscaping, Junk Removal, Clean Up, Moving. Contact (707) 8453087. (S-1227) A’O’KAY JUGGLING CLOWN & WIZARD OF PLAY. Amazing performances and games for all ages. Events, Birthdays, Festivals, Kidszones. I’ll Juggle, Unicycle, & bring Toys. aokayClown.com, (707) 499-5628. (S-1226) ERIC’S SERVICES. Home Repair, Maintenance, Affordable Prices (707) 499-4828. (S-0808) ARCATA CLEANING COMPANY. The non-toxic cleaning solution for your home or office. 707-8227819. (S-1227) (707) 443-1104 humboldtcremation.com No membership required. Only funeral provider in Humboldt County to be certiﬁed by the Green Burial Council. FD1963 Legal Services Greg Rael Law Offices Practice devoted exclusively to Criminal Defense since 1976 1026 Third Street Eureka (707) 445-9666 Harvey’s Harvey’s Ha H arvey’s a arvey y at do you have a project or idea you would like to build? contact peter portugal (707) 599-2158 BRADLEY DEAN ENTERTAINMENT. Singer Songwriter. Old Rock, Country, Blues. Private Parties, Bars, Gatherings of all Kinds. 832-7419. (M-0207) PIANO LESSONS BEGINNING TO ADVANCED ALL AGES. 30 years joyful experience teaching all piano styles. Juilliard trained, remote lessons available. Nationally Certified Piano Teacher. Humboldtpianostudio.com. (707) 502-9469 (M-1226) PIANO LESSONS. Beginners, all ages. Experienced. Judith Louise 476-8919. (M-1226) MUSIC LESSONS. Piano, Guitar, Voice, Flute, etc. Piano tuning, Instrument repair. Digital multitrack recording. (707) 476-9239. (M-0221) SAXOPHONE/FLUTE LESSONS. All ages, beginner-advanced, jazz improvisation, technique. Susie Laraine: 441-1343. (M-1227) GUITAR/PIANO/VOICE LESSONS. All ages, beginning and intermediate. Seabury Gould 444-8507. (M-1227) Too many tubas, overwhelmed with sTuff? Are your crowded shelves an earthquake hazard? List it all here. 442-1400. Visa/MC your ideal employee may be a Journal reader. 442-1400. VISA/ MC. Place your ad onlinle at www. northcoastjournal.com Old Town, Eureka 212 F St., 444-2936 ALL UNDER ER HEAVEN HE H EA AV VE EN N & Arcata Plaza 825-7760 let’s make something great together over 48 years professional experience in invention design - engineering - art - and fabrication in metal wood - fiberglass - plastic ▼ However, the Earth may become too hot for life in only a billion years as the Sun grows gradually hotter. northcoastjournal.com • North Coast Journal • Thursday, Dec. 20, 2012 45 body, mind New Lower Prices (707) 826-1165 ▼ &Spirit Institute of Healing Arts CONTINUED FROM PAGE 45 Loving Hands, Ongoing Classes Workshops Private Sessions Diana Nunes Mizer Parent Educator www.northcoast-medical.com MASSAGE THERAPY Give The Gift of Health – A Loving Hands Massage Gift Certiﬁcate Mon.-Fri. 11 a.m. to 8 p.m. Sat. 9 to 5; Sun. 12 to 4 Est. 1979 Treating Bulimia, Anorexia, Binge-Eating. Call 441-1484 Kim Moor, MFT #37499 707.445.4642 www.consciousparentingsolutions.com 739 12th St., Fortuna www.lovinghandsinstitute.com 725-9627 Energy Life Center HEAT THERAPY ENERGY MEDICINE Open Mon- Sat SHAWNA BELL Marriage & Family Therapist, MFC 47122 Depressed? Anxious? Relationship issues? Family problems? Just need someone to talk to? Counseling services available for individuals, couples and families. Bonnie M. Carroll, LCSW LCS # 23232 1225 Central Ave. Suite 3 McKINLEYVILLE 839-1244 KICK BUTTS! Become nicotine free with Dave Berman, Clinical Hypnotist. (707) 845-3749. www. ManifestPositivity.com. Helping the YOUniverse conspire on your behalf. (MB-1220) GET HEALTHY NOW. Feeling tired and sluggish? You may be missing some of the 40 nutrients our bodies need each day. Let us help you get your health back. (707) 839-4527. (MB-0103) TAROT AS AN EVOLUTIONARY PATH. Beginners and more experienced readers class begin Jan. 2013. Free Introduction at Humboldt Herbals and Moonrise Herbs. Call Carolyn Ayres, 442-4240, or see schedules at www.tarotofbecoming.com. (MB-1227) BREATHE LOVE. RECEIVE DEEP PSYCHIC HEALING WITH SEASONAL ASTROLOGY MAPPING. Gain clarity for self-empowerment. Rev. Elisabeth Zenker, MSW; (707) 845-1450. www.sacredenergyspace.com (MB-1220) GIT YER VALSSAGE! & Therapeutic Massage. Gift Certiﬁcates Available (707) 599-5639 Certiﬁed Massage Therapist Swedish, Deep Tissue Valerie Schramm NEW CLIENTS $10 OFF. Myrtletowne Healing Center 1480, #A Myrtle Ave. A Hidden Gem on Myrtle Ave., specializing in therapeutic massage. We will assist you on your road to recovery or work with you on that chronic pain issue. Swedish, deep tissue, trigger point, reflexology, acupressure, uterine centering, lymph drainage, lomi lomi, and more. Founders Hilary Wakefield and Sarah Maier are both Doulas, we do pregnancy massage as well! You are worth it, call today (707) 441-9175 (MB-1226) doTERRA ESSENTIAL OILS. Amazing results with no side effects. Maureen Brundage, (707) 498-7749, www. californiadoterra.com, maureen@ californiadoterra.com (MB-0214) CERTIFIED MASSAGE THERAPIST. Samantha Dudman-Miller, (707) 616-6031. (MB-0124) THE SPINE IS YOUR CONDUIT FOR LIFE-FORCE ENERGY. Open to the Alignment of Your Whole Self: Chiropractic by Dr. Scott Winkler, D.C. and Energy Work by Rebecca Owen. 822-1676. (MB-0919) HIGHER EDUCATION FOR SPIRITUAL UNFOLDMENT. Bachelors, Masters, D.D./Ph.D., distance learning, University of Metaphysical Sciences. Bringing professionalism to metaphysics. (707) 822-2111 (MB-1227) COACHING FOR PERSONAL EVOLUTION WITH REBECCA OWEN. Access your wholeness by cultivating your Presence in the Now and learning to clear old patterns. 822-5253. (MB-0919) + Gambling Treatment • Trauma Recovery Addiction Treatment • Stress Management DOT/SAP (707) 496-2856 • firstname.lastname@example.org 381 Bayside Road, Suite C • Arcata, CA 95521 Call 442-5433 for an appt. 616 Wood St. ~ Eureka email@example.com ARCATA ZEN GROUP MEDITATION. Beginners welcome. Sun., 8 a.m. North Coast Aikido Center, on F St. between 8th and 9th in Arcata. Wed., 6-7 p.m. at First Christian Church, 730 K, Eureka, ramp entrance and upstairs; newcomers please come 5 minutes early. Sun. contact, 826-1701. Wed. contact, barryevans9@yahoo. com, or for more info. call (707) 826-1701, www.arcatazengroup. org. (MB-1227) norcalrecoveryservices.com ZUMBA WITH MARLA JOY. Elevate, Motivate, Celebrate another day of living. Exercise in Disguise. Now is the time to start, don’t wait. All ability levels are welcome. Every Mon. and Thurs. at the Bayside Grange 6-7 p.m., 2297 Jacoby Creek Rd. $6/$4 Grange members. Every Wed. 6-7 p.m. in Fortuna at the Monday Club, 610 Main St. Every Tues. at the Trinidad Town Hall, Noon and every Thurs. at the Eureka Vets Hall, Noon. Marla Joy (707) 845-4307, marlajoy. zumba.com (MB-0110) AIKIDO. Is an incredibly fascinating and enriching non-violent martial art with its roots in traditional Japanese budo. Focus is on personal growth and pursuit of deeper truth instead of competition and fighting. Yet the physical power you can develop is very real. Come observe any time and give it a try! The dojo is on Arcata Plaza above the mattress store, entrance is around back. Class every weeknight starting at 6 p.m., beginning enrollment is ongoing. www.northcoastaikido.org, info@ northcoastaikido.org, 826-9395. (MB-1227) Looking for a romantic getaway? The Wedding Guide is available at newsstands and wedding retailers throughout Humboldt & online at northcoastjournal.com 46 NORTH COAST JOURNAL • THURSDAY, DEC. 20, 2012 • northcoastjournal.com Scientists predict the heat death of the universe — a state of no thermodynamic free energy — in about 10100 years. 2850 E St., Eureka (Henderson Center), 707 2355 Central Ave., McKinleyville 269-2400 839-9093 with Margy Emerson Martial Arts Academy Sunny Brae Shopping Ctr., Arcata 10-Week Session Starts Week of Jan. 7 707 www.communityrealty.net 3 ProgrAMS: • Traditional T’ai Chi this week Scan this code to see our listings online. Scan ad codes to visit our realtors’ websites directly. real estate • T’ai Chi for Back Pain and Arthritis • 42 Combined Forms -private lessons availableFor Schedule and Fees: www.margaretemerson.com or 3 bed, 3 bath, 2,650 sq ft luxurious Benbow home, large living room w/spacious fireplace, old growth redwood paneling, balcony, private in ground swimming pool & hot tub, fabulous views $449,900 5 bed, 3.5 bath, 2,720 sq ft single level ranch home in Eureka with huge extra bonus room, located on 1/3 acre, lots of parking, two car garage, attached carport, solarium, on demand water heater $329,900 this ICE! real e 822-6508 Visit any class free! Zoom in on our online map to see this week’s featured properties. CommUnITy CrISIS SUpporT: Humboldt Co. mental HealtH Crisis line Check out our Real Estate & Rental Listings in our Marketplace ■ EUREKA An Association of Independently Owned and Operated Realty Brokerages NEW LISTI NG! Charlie Tripodi Land Agent #01332697 this week NEW DIRECT LINE - 24/7 - 707.476.0435 real estate 707.445.8811 ext.124 REDU CED P R 2 bed, 1 bath, 946 sq ft gambrel style home in the area above Bigfoot Golf Course in Willow Creek, one bedroom downstairs & a loft bedroom upstairs, great summer retreat, garden area $99,900 445-7715 1-888-849-5728 443-6042 1-866-668-6543 rape Crisis team Crisis line 7 0 7. 8 3 4 . 3 2 41 Humboldt domestiC ViolenCe serViCes PIERSON-STYLE home built in 1953. This one-owner home has 3 bedrooms, hardwood ﬂoors, and is all redwood construction. It is located on a quiet street in a good neighborhood. A good ﬁrst-time buyer or investment home.. MLS# 236808 $114,750 Happy Holidays! Ferndale Land/Property $599,000 LISTIN G! 445-2881 Sylvia Garlick #00814886 Broker GRI/ Owner 1629 Central Ave., McKinleyville 707-839-1521 • firstname.lastname@example.org 1-800 SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433) 1-800-273-TALK YoutH serViCe bureau YoutH & familY Crisis Hotline national suiCide preVention lifeline national Crisis Hotline +/-160 acres off of Centerville Road near Ferndale. Property boasts beautiful ocean views, open meadows, standing timber, a pond, year round springs, fruit trees, gardening sites, small rustic cabin and more. Need help finding the home improvement experts? Weitchpec Land/Property $124,000 NEW +/-40 acres with Cappell Road running through the property. Cleared building sites, Klamath River frontage, year round access. Willow Creek NEW LISTING! Land/Property +/-160 acres located off of Friday Ridge Road just ten minutes outside of Willow Creek. Beautiful South Fork views, two developed building sites, several year round springs, and year round access. 444-2273 home & garden $389,000 service directory 2120 CAMPTON RD. STE #C – EUREKA, CA 95503 w w w. h u m b o l d t l a n d m a n . c o m End of the World trivia courtesy of Wikipedia.com. Make a donation today to the Wikimedia Foundation. COAST JOURNAL • •THURSDAY, northcoastjournal.com • NORTH northcoastjournal.com COAST JOURNAL THURSDAY,DEC. DEC.20, 20, 2012 2012 • NORTH 47 47 G I F T LO C A L LY M A D E n o s a e s S i ! e h T daz AL y l l C o O H L G I F T LO CA L LY M A D E • G I F T LO CA L LY M A D E • G I F T LO CA L LY M A D E • G I F T LO C A L LY M A D E • G I F T LO C A L LY M A D E • O G • G I F T LO C A L LY M A D E • • G I F T LO C A L LY M A D E G I F T LO C A L LY M A D E OPEN ‘TIL MIDNIGHT D A I L Y VISIT US AT www.wildberries.com TOP OF THE HILL G ST., ARCATA O • G I F T LO CA L LY M A D E N E P M ! TIL EVE N U Y! A S A AS D M IST HRISTM R CH ED C ATM, S VISA, MC, AMEX, DISCOVER ACCEPTED CLO HT G I IDN G I F T LO CA L LY M A D E • G I F T LO CA L LY M A D E • •