NORTH BAY BOH E MI A N | OCTO BE R 1 6 – 22, 20 1 3 | BO H E M I AN.COM
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It Showed Up at My Doorstep. Winners of the Bohemian’s 2013 fall writing contest
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ou know the drill: pull the pile out of your mailbox, rifle through it, toss most of it in the recycling bin. And, if you’re like us, sigh a wistful reminder of when getting the mail used to mean actual surprises. Hey, we get it. There’s email, texting, Skype, Gchat, Facebook—none of this is new. But in the bulk-rate world of the physical mailbox, a genuine hand-addressed envelope or package inspires a special kind of wonder. That’s what we were counting on when we announced this year’s writing contest, in which readers sent us their mailing addresses and we, in turn, sent them random objects on which to base a 400-word piece of creative fiction. The response was overwhelming, and 146 people signed up, a new record for our annual writing contest. Turns out people love getting free stuff in the mail. Due to the huge response, shipping was delayed slightly, and then affected by a postage error—sorry, our fault—but eventually most everyone received a manila envelope with an object of inspiration inside. No two objects were the same, and contestants had only two rules: (1) to work the object into the story somehow, and (2) to use, in some way, the phrase “it showed up on my doorstep.” You, dear readers, did not disappoint. How could we forget the tales of “Nevermore and the Golden Coin,” of “magic sperm,” of “beloved Cheerios”? How could we forget the submission that was, uh, the same story submitted the year before? How could we forget phrases such as “Like an emblem for Liberace’s cat, it was sparkly and gay as all hell”? In the end, five stories out of 146 had to be chosen as winners, and believe us when we say it was not an easy decision. That’s why we’ve picked five honorable mention entries: Andy Covert, Thea Rhiannon, Brian Gellman, Lois Pearlman and Noah Hallett, thank you. Virtual silver medals to you all. Printed below are the five winning stories, by Don Stoddard, Amy Robinson, Diane Swan, Gabriella Buonassisi and Aloysius Beerheart. Each of the winners will receive a gift certificate to Copperfield’s Books. Please join them, and us, in a public reading and celebration on Thursday, Oct. 17, at Acre Coffee in Santa Rosa’s Montgomery Village. The whole soiree goes from 6pm to 7:30pm, all winning entries will be read and discussed, and it’s completely free. We’d love to see you. Without further ado, the winning stories! —Gabe Meline