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Rebate debit card takes up to wks. exp. n 12 mos. All company names, trademarks, ogos and copyrights not the property of Verizon Wireless are the property of their respective owners. n CA: Net work details & coverage maps at vz w.com. Limited-time of fers. While supplies llast. Rebate debit card takes up to 6 wk s. & exp. iin 12 mos. All company names, trademark s, llogos and copyrights not the proper t y of Verizon Wireless are the proper t y of their respec tive owners. IIn CA: Sales tax based on full retail price of phone. 2009 Verizon Wireless. 93063 Sales tax based on full retail price of phone. � 2009 Verizon Wireless. 93063 02 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN Performances09 Enrich. Educate. Entertain. Your Community Non-Profit Arts Center for 28 years ...... ...... ...... ...... october 2 Neil Berg's 101 years of Broadway October 3 at 8pm Jeremy Camp with Natalie Grant & Bebo Norman November 17 Complexions Contemporary Ballet October 21 at 8pm Lisa Lampanelli November 20 Spanish Harlem Orchestra October 27 at 8pm Larry the Cable Guy December 8 and 9 Of Mice and Men by Barter Theatre October 29 at 8pm A Johnny Mathis Christmas December 10 For full schedule visit us online at wellsfargocenterarts.org For tickets call 707.546.3600 (noon-6pm Tue-Sat) Online wellsfargocenterarts.org Highway 101 to River Road, Santa Rosa � Connecting our Community through the Arts Wells Fargo Center for the Arts gratefully acknowledges generous support from WFCA_BOH_FULL_090209.indd 1 THE BOHEMIAN 8/25/2009 09.02.09-09.08.09 4:18:17 PM 03 SONOMA COUNTY'S BUSINESS BANK... then and now Member FDIC W hen come to your business, hen it comes to your business, es where you where you bank really does really matter. As Sonoma County's oldest and matter. As Sonoma County's oldest and largest community bank, Exchange largest community bank, Exchange Bank has the expe ience, service and er experience, service stability you need to help your busid to stability you your business grow. Find out the difference ffe grow. Find out difference that local expertis can make for you se o that expertise for you � Exchange Bank, Sonoma County's Exchange Bank, Sonoma County's business bank since 1890. since Visit any of our 19 convenient local 9 convenient Visit any branches or call 7 707.524.3000. branches www.exchangebank.com www.exchangebank.com 04 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 05 I loved this issue of the Bohemian ("Degree of Panic," Aug. 19). I read it and laughed so hard and realized that I had it really good going to college. Thank you Santa Rosa Junior College and Dominican University. The article written by Jackie Johansen, "A `Useless' Degree" had me laughing so hard since I know how she felt. The line "I could make sure that money is never a problem. However, I would rather live humbly, have the time to dip a Madeleine into lime blossom tea and let the taste of it urge my own version of Combray to bubble up from the depths of my being" is really for some what college is about. I, like Jackie, went to college to study what I am passionate about, creative writing and humanities. When I attended Dominican University, I was taught a new, independent way to think and view the world. This recession is teaching a lot of people who are able to go to college just how lucky they really are. A college education is worth the price since it is not about what one learns in the classroom but what one takes away from it for life. Thank you for publishing one of the best Marine Life Protection Act articles I have seen to date ("Coastal Conundrum," Aug. 26). The unethical political maneuvering that it took to ensure the 2XA loss has left me quite disgusted with the process. There was open and transparent negotiation until the end when the Blue Ribbon Task Force felt the need to give the high-dollar eco side more of what they were paying for. Then, when it looked like 2XA could still win, the governor's office had to get involved in a bullshit move to invalidate the whole process (but ensure a win for the side that paid for the process). I consider myself an environmentalist first and a fisherman second, but what happened was just wrong. Letter-writer Michael Zebulon is dead wrong (Letters, Aug. 26). No "very deep resentment" of Obama has been building "almost since Inauguration Day," except for the sore losers who voted for McCain. Obama has said repeatedly that if you like your current insurance, you should be able to keep it. If you don't, there should be a "public option." That's a medical insurance plan offered by the federal government, like Medicare, that you can choose as your insurance coverage. The private plans would be required to compete with the federal plan for quality and cost. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why the private health insurers, the American Medical Association, and the big pharmaceutical companies, are spending millions and millions, and are spreading lies, to defeat this healthcare reform bill. The rabble are roused by hearing such lies as the creation of a "death panel" in the reform bill. The insurers have agreed to accept that part of the plan that would require them to take everyone who applies. The trade-off, however, according to the companies, would be that Obama would sign off on an "individual mandate." That means everyone would be required to buy insurance--quite a bonanza for the insurers. This can only work if we have an affordable and adequate public option, which the insurers are trying so desperately to kill. No review of Oliver at the Sixth Street Playhouse? We could expect that much from the PD, but the Bohemian? Are we to assume that the production is so bad, your reviewer, David Templeton, thought it best not to embarrass the theater and cast? Any comments from the esteemed Mr. Templeton? David Templeton responds: I do not review shows directed by Holly Vinson, because, as an occasional actor, I have been directed by her in past and hope to be again, I consider her a friend and mentor, and even if I could be objective about her work, reviewing it would open me to negative speculation and accusations of conflict of interest. I do look forward to seeing Oliver, though, as a fan of Ms. Vinson's work. 06 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN Locally owned and operated since 1949 Fri, Sat, Sun & Mon 9/4�9/7 4 Days Only This weekend you do not have to wait for any government stimulus packages for TeeVax has gone to our manufactures and negotiated many more great offers than we have space to show in this ad. Great products, service and selection just like we have been doing since 1949 when Ruth & Monty Montague started TeeVax on the front porch of their house on Santa Rosa Ave. TeeVax is your local family owned Sonoma County Home Town Brand Source Dealer. 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Billion Dollar Buying Power 707-486-5037 PeoplesHomes.net Home Appliance & Kitchen Center We build customer relationships that last for years because we put our customer's desires before our own. We strive to offer the best service and products so our customers feel good about referring TeeVax to their family and friends. Mon-Fri, 8:30 to 6:00, Sat 9:00 to 5:00, Sun 11:00 to 4:00 707-545-1195 In Historic Railroad Square � 422 Wilson Street � Santa Rosa � teevax.com THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 07 08 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN Locals Spa Pass Locals receive 20% off must bring in this coupon The Hyatt Vinyard Creek Hotel & Spa 170 Railroad Street, Santa Rosa Reservation: 707.636.7300 Hotel: 707.636.7100 www.vinyardcreek.hyatt.com in the Spa Feel at Home with Your Dentist! ! Full Service Dentistry ! 21 Years in Practice ! Cosmetic Dentistry ! Warm environment with knowledgable staff ! All ages welcome! Rose Lucchese DDS 568 Petaluma Ave Sebastopol 707-829-0692 THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 09 napawineandcraftsfair.com ONE-OF-A-KIND Art & Handcrafted Goods PRESENTED BY THE ARTISTS Local Merchants Napa & Sonoma Valley Wines Artisanal Foods / Microbrewed Beers Children's Events & Creative Activities PRODUCED PRODUCED BY THE NAPA DOWNTOWN ASSOCIATION NAPA DOWNTOWN ASSOCIATION AT 10 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN news for Sonoma, Marin & Napa Counties "Official Newspaper of White Shoes" y y A new proposal aims to fix the floor for gas prices at $3.50 a gallon. Yow. Can a tax at the pump rescue California? By Jessica Lussenhop hen 27th District Assemblymember Bill Monning hosted a town hall meeting last month with the Campaign for Sensible Transportation, the table seemed set for a conversation on planes, trains and automobiles and the budget cuts to public transportation. But when Fred Keeley showed up, it became clear that the dialogue on the Golden State's abysmal budget deal has already left the station. After a budget session that gutted not just public transportation but every service imaginable, the two seemed to be trying to channel frustration into a call for major tax reform. "We have to have a tax system which will be able to be passed by the Legislature before the end of this year," Keeley told a sizable crowd. Keeley, a member of the Commission on the 21st Century Economy, gave a brief outline of the package likely to come from the commission, much of which, such as f lattening the income tax, he acknowledges is regressive in nature. But, he said, "it will have the capacity going forward to be able to bake a bigger revenue pie so we can claw our way back" from the hole the state's in. One initially startling component is something called a "pollution tax" or "gasoline surcharge tax," and it could be headed for a pump near you. It would establish a f loor of $3.50 per gallon for gas in California. Whether the real cost was $2 or $3 a gallon, the price would never fall below $3.50. The difference would f low to state coffers. As the commission prepares to hand off its final set of recommendations to the governor and legislature this month, Keeley says a pollution tax is all but certain to be included. "[Senate President Pro Tem] Darrell Steinberg essentially told me a pollution tax has to be part of the package," he says. "This is not a righty / lefty thing. This is a broadly supported concept." The idea comes from Severin Borenstein, director of the University of California Energy Institute and a professor at UC Berkeley who proposed the idea in a white paper last December. "This would take a small step in moving people away from the Ford Expedition and toward y THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 11 Don't let the reign of error on healthcare continue! By R. W. Goatlips, Esq. 've thoroughly read President Obama's proposed healthcare plan. And by "read" I mean I've heard what other commentators on AM talk radio have had to say about the various versions floating through Congress. And in these versions there are a lot of devils in the details. Bad devils who look like John Carradine, with curly mustaches and opera capes. All of them from a place called "Hell." Chief among these details is the so-called public option. Not only does this "public option" need to be taken off the table, the table itself should be chopped up into little pieces and burnt. In fact, it's not a table, it's a board--a "death board" to decide whether or not you're healthy enough to live. Federally funded doctors, some of them from Muslim countries, will decide to send old people off on an iceberg. Now at last we can see why Democrats and other liberals are concerned about socalled global warming. They need those icebergs for their euthanasia schemes! Former governess Sarah Palin knows of these icebergs--she could see them from her window. And as an Alaskan, she knows the special horror of watching the old, the unfit or even just slow learners made to "ride the snow-cone," "go visit Frosty" or even "take the Polar Express." Having patriotically refused to ever visit a foreign country, I know perfectly well, perhaps better than anyone alive, what goes on in foreign public clinics. Don't get me started about Michael Moore and his visit to Cuba in Sicko, because once I start, I can't stop for hours. He's really very fat, you know. Cuba, an example? A slave nation that treats brain tumors with banana leaf poultices and Santeria rituals? How much better it is in Honduras, the Switzerland of Central America, where for a few hundred dollars, doctors will perform any medical procedure from a tummy tuck to a leg transplant. Thanks to the unregulated free market, one Tegucigalpa hospital has developed an innovative surgery. Here, a live Chihuahua is implanted to take the place of a diseased kidney, preventing dialysis and also giving the patient a loyal and friendly animal companion. Bloviate.com has an important essay on the situation in countries that have made the mistake of installing government healthcare. Take Australia, a country of shut-ins. From Perth to Brisbane, nothing but coughing, unwell physical ruins. After a few decades of public health, these trembling Antipodeans are now so weak they are routinely thrashed by the kangaroos they once easily defeated in boxing matches. The Outback is now overrun with futuristic, leather-clad punks on motorcycles. They know the injuries they sustain from wrist-mounted crossbows and razor boomerangs will be patched up by the long-suffering Australian taxpayer. Take Canada, please! The reason why British Columbia advertises vacation all the time is because everyone in the nation is too ill to take one themselves. Rosy-cheeked from consumption or something, these sufferers overindulge in skiing, tobaggoning and mountain climbing in hopes of retrieving enough strength to make it to the hospice. Mounties and lumberjacks lean on one another like cripples, trying to stagger to the U.S. border in hope of treatment. Fortunately, the Canadian government is doing its best to underfund hospitals to prove the error of this single-payer system. Sadly, this reign of error continues: Norway, packed with diseased wretches; Sweden, "the sick man of Scandinavia"; Finland, a land of stunted men and women barely taller than concrete garden trolls . . . I could go on, but everyone else in the world has it wrong and we've got it right. Further examples would just muddy the issue, and reading just makes you effeminate anyway. I'll continue to get the news I need from the airwaves: from people as physically fit as Rush, as mentally healthy as Glenn and as calmly objective as Bill O'Reilly. Now at last we can see why Democrats and other liberals are concerned about so-called global warming. They need those icebergs for their euthanasia schemes! R. W. Goatlips, Esq., is a senior fellow at the Institute for Counterintuitive Studies in Washington, D.C. Open Mic is a weekly feature in the Bohemian. We welcome your contribution. To have your topical essay of 700 words considered for publication, write email@example.com. 12 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN Fine Dining For Wild Birds 71 Brookwood Ave., Santa Rosa 707.576.0861 Mon-Sat 10am-5:30pm, Sun 11am-4pm � www.wbu.com Birdseed . Feeders . Birdbaths . Optics . Nature Gifts . Books THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 13 Healdsburg WN orth St Plaz Plaza a St e Thriv 101 We Have CO2! Competitive Prices Expert Knowledge Friendly Staff Great Location Highest Quality Nutrients Great Soil Selection Tired of the Drive, Come to Thrive in V t eS Hea urg ldsb Ave nue 70-A W North Street, Healdsburg www.ThriveHydro.com Customer satisfaction guaranteed 14 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN 707-433-4068 Now open seven days a week! Call for extended Summer hours the Ford Focus," Borenstein says. The tax will slide along, inversely, with the price of oil. As the price of oil goes up, the pollution tax diminishes, and as gas prices drop, the tax would increase. A severance tax on oil extraction would kick in as the price of oil climbed and the pollution tax amount sank, offsetting volatility. The spoils, calculated back in 2008 to be about $10 billion a year, would go to transportation, says Keeley. Borenstein says he would prefer to see the money go into the general fund. "Any time you start earmarking money, you end up with consequences that box us into bad decisions." 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Max 6 group equip and Max 12 floor classes. 943 Sir Francis Drake Blvd, Kentfield, CA 94904 415-419-5312 6 Petaluma Blvd N, Ste A6, Petaluma, CA 94952 707-765-6922 Marin Studio Downtown Petaluma Studio It's not the only issue that's been raised with the tax. Jean Ross, executive director of the California Budget Project, has testified before the commission that a pollution tax is unfair to lower and middleincome families. "The amount that people drive doesn't vary much on income. Lower income people end up spending a lot more of their income," she says. "And it doesn't grow. The goal is to have people consume less fuel. If they do that, your revenues are going to decline, not increase." Dennis DeCota, executive director of California Service Station and Automotive Repair Association and a gas station owner for 31 years in Marin County, agrees, adding, "What it does is take people looking for work, students and people that are on fixed incomes, and it really punishes them," he says. However, DeCota was pleased, albeit skeptical, by one of the tax commission's other recommendations: elimination of the state sales tax. He says he would gladly trade sales tax for a pollution tax, which is, according to Keeley, how people should view the commission's recommendations. "Taken as a package, most people will pay less taxes," he says. "There's never a constituency for higher taxes, only what taxes purchase. If you would like a cleaner environment and healthier families, what price are you willing to pay to make that happen?" Lowest Price in Town! Brazilian Waxing 35 $ Touchstone Therapies 707.331.0631 "Always Professional, Always Affordable" 882 2nd Street, Santa Rosa | www.touchstonespatherapies.com THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 15 Promote Your Green Business in our new section "Going Green" Call Today @ 707.527.1200 and ask for rates, sizes and expert tips! The Bohemian is "Going Green" Every Week! 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Suzanne Wandrei EcoGreen Certified 2006 Sebastopol Realtor of the Year Coldwell Banker Residential Brokerage 101 Morris Street - Suite. 100 Sebastopol, CA 95472 3244 Gravenstein Hwy North Sebastopol, CA 3244 Gravenstein Hwy North Sebastopol, CA in or Starting Marc 1st: M 6:00, Sun 8:30 5:00 Starting March 1st: Mon-Sat 7 :30 � 6:00, Sun 8:30 � 5:00 ti March t: Mon-Sat 7:30 6: www.harmonyfarm.com www.harmonyfarm.com 707.823. 125 707 823 91 707.823.9125 cell: 707.292.9414 Please call cell first office direct: 707.824.4260 www.suzannewandrei.com 16 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN Glenn Beck Red vs. Van Jones Green By Juliane Poirier bama's green jobs guy, Van Jones, got some free publicity last week in Glenn Beck's conspiracy sermon on Fox News. What I found interesting about Beck's rant was the way in which he used a chalkboard. On it was a diagram with arrows to and from the list of alleged villains, including Jones, assisting with Obama's formerly secret plan: a Marxist takeover of the United States, stamping out capitalism as we know it. Beck could have used a dry-erase board, but curiously he chose the surface used by teachers during the McCarthy years. For those who are new to chalkboards, they are black or green smooth, matte surfaces that accept chalk marks. These teaching-learning tools were ubiquitous in classrooms during the 19th and 20th centuries, until dry-erase boards replaced them about 20 years ago. To work on advanced numeric formulas, some of the world's most brilliant minds have used the chalkboard. Albert Einstein, for example, was many times photographed while working equations on a chalkboard. Beck did not use the chalkboard for thinking anything through, but underlined and drew boxes around names and arrows pre-written on the board. Presumably he couldn't write because he needed both hands to keep grabbing his head in a show of incredulity for those who might not be feeling it enough. Back to chalkboards. Brilliant minds no longer appear to use them. These mostly obsolete tools are used where no better tools exist or when they might serve a psychological advantage--say, if a large portion of a viewing audience grew up in an era of McCarthyinspired conformity, learning their lessons from a chalkboard, including civics lessons about the evils of communism. Some members of the viewing audience, including my parents, might even recall the comic pamphlet issued by an educational arm of the Roman Catholic Church in 1947 whose cover depicted a background of hell-like flames dwarfing the fearful-looking adults being seized by commies (who appear to be strangling a woman) under banners reading, "Is This Tomorrow" [sic] and "America Under Communism!" So I guess the nostalgia factor triggered by an old American classroom chalkboard was an excellent choice for someone who believes that the president of our country is a Marxist. Along with Obama, Jones is thus labeled for wanting to engineer the new green economy to boost the lives of everyone, including the socially disadvantaged. After Beck's conspiracy theory was fully disclosed, humorist David Roberts blogged at the Grist.org website. "Turns out Van Jones, President Obama's green jobs czar, is going to coordinate a vast radical/communist/ black nationalist takeover of our sweet, virginal land of liberty," Roberts wrote in mock horror. "Most diabolical of all, he's going to do it by organizing efforts to train and employ lowincome people in private sector jobs. Don't you understand? They're going to take over from the inside! You know: them." Again I am thinking of the McCarthy years, of rampant blacklisting, and of Edgar Hoover spying on citizens. Does any of this sound familiar? Back then: Belong to a food co-op? A-ha! You're a commie. Now: Black leader devoted to environmental justice? You must be a whitehating commie. In 1956, a bill introduced to improve mental health services in Alaska was rejected by politicians who claimed it was a communist plan to create a brainwashing clinic and United Nations concentration camps in Alaska (very close to where one aspiring leader views Russia from her house). Clearly, mental health was too red for the times. So over half a century later, green jobs must also be too red, at least for the head-grabbing guy in front of the chalkboard. Ever hear Jones talk about environmental justice? He describes the first two waves of environmental activism as those that curbed and regulated pollution, but at the expense of the poor, whose backyards became toxic dump sites. Environmental law favored the affluent. Jones envisions the green economy including legislation protecting the poor and vulnerable. "Let's create this third green wave so that it lifts all boats," Jones said. I'm all for that. And if that makes me a commie, I'm in very good company. The nostalgia factor triggered by an old American classroom chalkboard was an excellent choice for someone who believes that the president of our country is a Marxist. Water Conservation Experts � � � � tankless water heaters high efficiency toilets recirculation general plumbing needs $99 Drain Service Special Free Phone Estimates Friendly, Honest Service Call us for your plumbing needs! 707.528.8228 PURE ORGANIC SEAWEED FACIAL CARE BY SEAFLORA Mermaids Spa 707-823-3535 WWW. MERMAIDSSPA . COM THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 17 18 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN Searching for bagel photos is excruciatingly boring. Our ( fairly silly) search for perfection in the bageling arts By Saul Isler hen you scarf a bagel virtually every day of your life, it damned well better be a good one. I do such scarfing, and when my beloved Marin Bagel Co. all of a sudden went kaput, I was forced to mount a desperate bagel chase that stretched from Sausalito to the hinterlands of Santa Rosa and sideways to Napa. Allow me to dispel the myth that the best bagels come from New York. That is so very untrue. The best bagels come from Cleveland, as did I some years ago. You may take that with a pound of salt. I am here, however, to discuss a matter of much nearer importance. Where do the best in the North Bay come from? And can they hope to touch Cleveland? Ours come close, but no touching, please. The exogenous bagel was either birthed in Poland, where beygls were first given in 1610 as gifts to women in childbirth, or in Vienna, where a Jewish baker created the delicacy in 1683 as a gift to the ruling king. The Viennese story claims it was shaped like a stirrup (or a horseshoe--tales vary), which in German is beugel. Thus sort of comes the word. (Some say that better than a bagel is a bialy, a smaller, drier, oniony version of its bigger brother, too rare around here to be treated further in this less than scholarly treatise.) These beygl / beugel stories may be apocryphal. What we know, more prosaically, is that the word came from the Yiddish beigl, the familiar torus traditionally made of a yeasted wheat dough, perhaps sweetened with brown sugar, rolled then formed into a ring, boiled in water and baked. And if it ain't done that way, it ain't a bagel. Not a real one, anyhow. Not a real good one, for sure. One selects a bagel first by hefting it as one would a nice book. Since it's unlikely to be available for this purpose, this must be done by eye. Though perhaps small, it should at least look heavy. Lightweight bagels are for lightweightbagel persons. Its size and shape and the curve of its hole, even the lack of a hole, are of little importance. For the seed-seeking bagelophile, seeding on both sides is a definite plus. If you don't believe me, try offering an unseeded bottom to a loved one as you munch the top. But ultimately, the only test that really matters is taste. Healthiness? Must we really talk about that? Well, not without comparing bagels to doughnuts, difficult to do because, with all the varieties of one versus the other, you'd be comparing apples to oranges. Wanting to compare apples only, I chewed only one type of bagel, the sesame, on my searing search for the best, eschewing poppy seed, garlic, onion, rye, everything, salt, cinnamon, raisin, pumpernickel, blueberry, egg (echhh!), sourdough, asiago cheese--I haven't the space or the stomach to list all that are available. The test was not blind, but you should know that no one paid me to eat these bagels except the Bohemian itself. I can't be bought by bagels alone. I preferred, but didn't demand, that the bagelry be a place with "Bagel" in its name, and be artisanal, not a chain like Noah's, not a supermarket, coffee shop or patisserie. Also, whether the bagels are hand-formed or extruded by machine, water must be used in their making. That cakey, fluffy, lightweight, waterless bagel you find in the freezer section at your super? Feh and double feh! Never having speed-dated bagels before, I was surprised to find myself--if underwhelmed by a few--seriously knocked out by several. My choice of the top was not far from the bottom. Translation: while our best are awfully damn good, our worst aren't far off. And geography has nothing to do with it. THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 19 But our single best, in one man's highly subjective opinion? The one I'm going to down for the next 364 breakfasts? Barton's, San Anselmo's little storefront bagelier. Barton's bagels are medium-sized, nicely seeded top and bottom, and they're wonderfully dense and chewy for bracketing lox and cream cheese when untoasted, and perfect when they are, giving up the kind of sweet that your mother ascribed to things like potatoes and Brussels sprouts. Almost as good are Sonoma's Homegrown and Sonoma Valley Bagel, Napa's Golden and Sausalito's smaller but delicious offerings from Bridgeway Bagel. All told, our Left Coast Bay-gels roll well with the Right Coast's. Try one. It'll lift your life up a nosh. Eleven yummy bagels in the stomach of just one man First, I froze all the seeded bagels to keep them out-of-the-bin fresh till I could get to them for testing. Then I zapped them for 35 seconds and sliced them, retained their upper half for toasting and schmearing with a little unsalted butter, and tasting their lower half naked (the bagels, not me). Shopping tri-county indy bagelmeisters, I discovered only 11. Their particulars, including cost per bagel, cost per dozen, size and my A to F take on them, are listed below. Sonoma County Who: California Bagel & Deli, 124 Calistoga Road, Santa Rosa. 707.538.2764. What: Nicely made, seeded both sides but a little dry and lacking in sweetness. How much: $1.25, single; $9.50, dozen. How big: 4 ounces. Da Grade: C� Who: Cafe de Croissants & Grateful Bagel, 1015 Fourth St., Santa Rosa. 7070.527.7530. Also, Grateful Bagel, 300 S. Main St., Sebastopol. 707.823.5220. What: A very good bagel. Makes choosing difficult. Well-seeded. How much: 95 cents, single; $9.50, dozen. How big: 4 ounces. Da Grade: B+ Who: Homegrown Baking Co., 201 W. Napa St., Sonoma. 707.996.0166. What: You gotta love a proprietor who calls himself Shaman of the Board. How much: 75 cents, single; $7.50, dozen. How big: 4.5 ounces. Da Grade: A� Who: Sonoma Valley Bagel Co., 2194 Santa Rosa Ave., Santa Rosa. 707.579.5484. 350 Rohnert Park Expressway W., Rohnert Park. 707.585.8095. 515 Hahman Drive, Santa Rosa. 707.526.1631. What: Definitely among the upper crust. Chewy, doughy, seeded both sides. How much: $1.25, single; $8.95, dozen. How big: 4 ounces. Da Grade: A� Napa County Who: Golden Bagel Cafe, 3240 Jefferson St., Napa. 707.258.1413. What: Chewy, very well-seeded on both sides. It's not all just about winemaking in Napa. How much: 95 cents, single; $7.99, dozen. How big: 3.5 ounces. Da Grade: A Marin County Who: Barton's Bagels, 645 San Anselmo Ave., San Anselmo. 415.458.8818. What: Now we're talkin'! How much: 85 cents, single; $8, dozen. How big: 4 ounces. Da Grade: A+ Who: Bridgeway Bagel, 3001 Bridgeway, Sausalito. 415.332.6445. What: A damned good bagel, if on the smallish side. But size doesn't count, remember? How much: 85 cents, single; $8, dozen. How big: 3 ounces. Da Grade: A� Who: House of Bagels, 640 Fourth St., San Rafael. 415.454.5348. What: I was hoping these would be the best because they're closest to me. How much: 90 cents, single; $8.95, dozen. How big: 4 ounces. Da Grade: B+ Who: New York Bagels, 308 Strawberry Village, Mill Valley. 415.381.3599. What: You can pretend you're from the Big Apple, but that doesn't make it so. Well-seeded but on the dry side. How much: 95 cents, single; $8.95, baker's dozen. How big: 4 ounces. Da Grade: B� Who: New York by the Bay Deli & Cafe, 1005 Northgate Drive, San Rafael. 415.472.6674. What: A respectable bagel. Could use a little more sweetness. How much: 95 cents, single; $7.50, dozen. How big: 3.5 ounces. Da Grade: B Who: Redwood Bagel, 1559 S. Novato Blvd., Novato. 415.897.9007. What: Very good but also not quite as sweet as it should be. How much: 70 cents, single; $7.35, dozen. How big: 3.5 ounces. Da Grade: B+ --S.I. 20 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN Taste the Dark Side handmade dark chocolates & 100 organic teas 707.829.1181 | 6988 McKinley St Sebastopol (next to Whole Foods) sonomachocolatiers.com THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 21 22 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN ctor Fred MacMurray retired to his Russian River Valley ranch as often as he could, eager to remove his growing family from the artificial hustle of Los Angeles and to get his own hands dirty working the earth. Set low in a tree-lined bowl that emphasizes the pure blue of the coast-cleared sky above, MacMurray Ranch is the kind of jewel that reminds North Bay residents how lucky we are to live every day where other people come to vacation. A Fred's daughter Kate is the custodian of the ranch's legacy, and she graciously opens the home, which is a time-capsule of rustic 1940s-style "ranch" living, to the public a few times a year. The Sonoma County Wine Weekend and the Showcase: Taste of Sonoma events have become signature times to enjoy the rural elegance that the MacMurray family has cherished for some 60 years. The weekend itself is a dizzying trot of winemaker and specialty dinners that culminate on Sept. 6 with the 17th annual Sonoma Valley Harvest Wine Auction, this year held at Cline Cellars and hosted by the longtime growers the Sangiacomo family, who are in their 80th year of making wine in Sonoma. The auction raises thousands for charity each year. Mere mortals may prefer the still-pricey-but-man-do-youget-a-lot Showcase event, slated for Sept. 5 at MacMurray Ranch. A celebration of our natural wonderland, Showcase has literally hundreds of vintners pouring and some 100 restaurateurs offering artful tastes of their wares, includes a celebrity chef cooking competition, a "bubble lounge" hosted by Gloria Ferrer Sparkling Wines, and has a true educational bent, with a crushpad area matching local winemakers with the public and their questions as well as sommelier Christopher Sawyer's individual tours of the pouring tables. MacMurray Ranch gets hot in the summer, so hats and fans are advised, as is the consumption of plenty of water. But this semi-dressy event is as much fun for the locals as it is for the out-of-towners who will be eating and drinking for three days straight, enjoying the kind of down-home real food experience that sticks to more than just the ribs. Sonoma County Wine Weekend runs Friday�Sunday, Sept. 4�6. Winemaker lunches Friday, $75. Showcase Saturday, $150. Winemaker dinners, Friday�Saturday, $160; signature dinners, $175. Auction Sunday, $450. MacMurray Ranch, 9015 Westside Road, Healdsburg. www.sonomawinecountryweekend.com. "Kudos to the owner, Mrs. Mona Dhar, and her brother and co-owner Sumeer Karihaloo, who manages the restaurant, for giving the North Bay its finest Indian restaurant, and to Chef Uddab for his ability to create Indian food that transcends the ordinary" Jeff Cox � Press Democrat TOTAL BILL Show ad. Exp 9-30/09. 10 % OFF 707.538.3367 52 Mission Circle, Santa Rosa (at Hwy 12 & Mission Blvd.) Gretchen Giles THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 23 THAI MEKONG Mission Plaza/Mission & Hwy 12-Santa Rosa Bring this ad in for 1 Free appetizer, (#1-#5) with dinner for 2 in restaurant 707.538.8382 www.ThaiMekongrestaurant.com 24 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN North County WHY WAIT East County ? for the classes you need for the future you want for the career of your dreams Make your dreams a reality in just 6 to 18 months with Empire's focused, complete career training. South County Accounting and Bookkeeping Medical Assisting, Billing and Coding Office Administration Paralegal and Legal Secretary Hospitality, Tourism and Wine Information Technology � Microsoft, Cisco, Linux, Security Choose day or evening classes. Most students qualify for financial aid, and all graduates receive lifetime job placement assistance. Mid County Why Wait? Start September 14. Call today or visit us on the Web. www.empcol.edu 707-546-4000 3035 Cleveland Avenue, Santa Rosa West County Business � Law � Technology � Medical Business � Law � Technology � Medical THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 25 P Upvalley ity the wine country wine shop. In some states, where the timely demise of Prohibition is incomplete, arcane laws forbid the sale of even the tamest spirits alongside grocery items. That strikes a Californian as shocking and unnecessary, as if we bought bread here but butter at the state dairy shop over there. But that's good business for wine shops. Here, with the actual wineries in all directions, many wine shops focus on the tourist trade and mail order, which shows in their prices. What a funky, backyard-chicken-coop college town like Cotati needs in a wine shop is friendly, unpretentious, with a small but unique selection of under $20 wines. And that they have in Cotati Corner Fine Wines. This little Cotati Hub shop purveys a modest selection of local product and a smattering of imports. They've got your Scharffen Berger sparkling, and one Prosecco. Zins from small producers like Hobo, Atascadero Creek and Haraszthy. (That the descendants of the inveterate 19thcentury Hungarian vintner have resurrected the brand was news to me.) They've got your obligatory Silver Oak Cab and up-and-coming Zepaltas Pinot, with Carol Shelton pink in the cold case. Areas are given over to table seating and paraphernalia shopping: from a classic line of satirical winetasting greeting cards to coasters, stoppers and trinkets. If there's any fault to be found here, it's only that more space might be devoted to even more wine. The shopping gets hopping on Thursdays when the farmers market bustles across the street. This week's tasting saw cool whites like Taft Street Sauvignon Blanc and Carol Shelton Ros� on tap; another flight surveyed a trio of Medlock Ames releases. The hitch: patrons must bring their own glass, or purchase a plastic, virtually unbreakable glass for $2 that could come in handy on a day hike. The joint generated a buzz among a group of happy hour regulars, busily chatting away while the staff found time to greet aimless wanderers. They're a low-key and helpful bunch, who never mentioned anything like a "wine club"-- which, oddly enough, some wine shops do, and repeatedly. (Wine club? Take a look at a map--we're in it.) Celebrate with Us 30 Years and going strong! As Santa Rosa's most romantic restaurant, thousands of couples over the years have celebrated engagements, weddings and anniversaries at La Gare. Family owned La Gare serves fresh local ingredients with top French and European cooking techniques. La Gare 208 Wilson Street, Santa Rosa Wed, Thurs 5:30pm | Fri, Sat & Sun 5pm Mon, Tues Closed www.lagarerestaurant.com | 707.528.4355 Downvalley In fact, once I'd selected a perfectly serviceable $12 bottle of chilled Pinot Gris, the proprietor suggested an equally serviceable Sonoma Coast Pinot Gris--for just $7. The pity of it is that there aren't more shops like this. Cotati Corner, 1818 La Plaza, Ste. 106, Cotati. Open Tuesday�Saturday. Tastings, Thursday�Friday, 5pm to 8pm. Fees vary; bring your own glass or purchase at bar. 707.793.9357. James Knight 26 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN The astounding Pilobolus Dance Company perform Nov. 6 at the Marin Center. Our highly selective guide to everything good to do this fall Compiled by Gretchen Giles and Jackie Johansen Previous contestants include Dana Carvey, Robin Williams and Carlos Alazraqui of Reno 911. Napa Valley Opera House, 1030 Main St., Napa. 8pm. 707.226.7372. Also Sept. 18 at the Marin Center, 10 Avenue of the Flags, San Rafael (8:30pm; $30; 415.499.6800) and Sept. 25 at the Wells Fargo Center, 50 Mark West Springs Road, Santa Rosa (8pm; $19.50�$39.75; 707.546.3600). Marco Antonio Solis Sept. 11. The creator of some of Latin music's greatest hits, such as "Tu Carcel," "Como Fui a Enamorarme de Ti," "Sigue sin Mi," and "Si No Te Hubieras Ido," Solis regularly fills arena-sized venues. Wells Fargo Center, 50 Mark West Springs Road, Santa Rosa. 8pm. $55�$125. 707.546.3600. ArtRageous: Great Balls of Fire Sept. 12. This festival puts the heat back into a cool fall evening. With a fire-breathing dragon named Claude, food and drink that will make you sweat, and Simon Chabon's Eternal Fire Spectacular, there is no need to say goodbye to summer just yet. All this heat benefits San Rafael's Art Works Downtown. At a private Tiburon beach. 6pm. $150. 415.451.8119. www.artworksdowntown.org/ artrageous.html. Cajun & Zydeco Fest Sept. 12. Are the days becoming bland and predictable? Infuse life with some good ol' fashioned South Pacific spice at this year's Cajun and Zydeco Festival in Sebastopol. The local rotary chapter keeps the fest at beautiful Ives Park for some last-minute summer sun, promising a bigger dance floor and more shade this year. All rumps under the redwoods are guaranteed to be shakin' as C. J. Chenier and the Red Hot Louisiana Band AllStars, Jeffery Broussard and the Creole Cowboys and many more storm the stage to take the edge off that gator sausage. Ives Park, 400 Willow St., Sebastopol. 10:30am�7pm. $20; under 12, free. 707.824.2550. www.rotarycajun.com. Great American Blues & BBQ Fest Sept. 12. This free downtown event celebrates two uniquely American products, and you know that's blues and barbecue. The inimitable Austin de Lone brings his cheerfully named 14th Rib Review band featuring Nick Gravenites THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 September Seventh Annual Chautauqua Revue Sept. 10�12. Over a hundred years ago, in encampments all over the United States, lecture, debates, vaudeville, drama and storytelling took place. These gatherings became known as Chautauquas, and the tradition has set up sturdy camp in Occidental. This year's event is sure to entertain, with magician and mentalist Lawrence Lemon, rope-trick artist Cheryl Bacon, storyteller Fred Euphrat, musician Rebecca Riots, the Hubbub Club Marching Band and two children's matinees, among other delights. The Occidental Arts and Ecology Center, 15290 Coleman Valley Road, Occidental. $15�$30 sliding scale. 707.874.1557. The S.F. Comedy Competition Finals Sept. 11. Worldly wits square off for a shot at $30,000 and a fairly high-profile catapult toward fame. 27 paid advertising section Contemporary/Museum Framing Conceptual Art Gallery 707.473.9600 707.474.9600 www.hammerfriar.com 575-9900 JIM & GAYLE MOORE OWNERS 4235 MONTGOMERY DR. SANTA ROSA, CA WWW.VILLAGE-FRAME.COM INFO@VILLAGE-FRAME.COM RIVERFRONT ART GALLERY 132 PETALUMA BLVD. NORTH, DOWNTOWN PETALUMA WWW.RIVERFRONTARTGALLERY.COM 707-778-4ART(4278) unique art & quality custom framing new owner new equipment new art 6984 McKinley Ave Sebastopol (beside Whole Foods) 7 0 7. 8 2 3 .19 7 1 Sebastopol Gallery 150 N. Main St. Sebastopol, CA 707.829.7200 Daily 11-6 sebastopol-gallery.com Greatful Dead Memorabilia 110 North Main St., Sebastopol, CA Around the World firstname.lastname@example.org O Locally Made: treehouse 28 clothing 707.829.ROCK (7624) O Artwork, Collectibles & More O Fine Gems & Minerals from Sebastopol: the most artistic community in the County! 1st Thursday Monthly, 6-8pm September 3 October 1 Contemporary Japanese Prints 707.875.2922 Enjoy Art, Walk and Dine in Downtown 1781 Hwy 1, Bodega Bay www.renbrown.com Call Today to Advertise! 707.527.1200 | email@example.com 28 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN to helm that day, while food and sauce and wet wipes and bibs inform the rest. Sept. 12, 11am�6pm, downtown San Rafael. Free. 415.383.3470. Russian River Jazz and Blues Festival Sept. 12�13. Now in its 33rd year, the Russian River Jazz and Blues festivals have telescoped from two events into one weekend, the first devoted to jazz, the second to blues. Saturday features Al Jarreau headlining, while Sunday welcomes the Naw'lins funk of the Neville Brothers and Dr. John. Johnson's Beach, Guerneville. 10am to 6pm. $45�$170; 10 and under, free. 707.869.1595. www.omegaevents.com. Open Studios at Atelier One Sept. 12�13. Since 1987, artists have had an affordable workspace to create and imagine at the 90-year-old Atelier One building that was formally used for drying fruit. Fourteen residents will showcase their work at this open studio event. Experience the eclectic collection of work that includes painting, sculpture, photography and fashion design. Atelier One, 2860 Bowen St., Graton. Free. 707.823.4766. www.atelierone.blogspot.com. Jarvis Puppet Festival & Workshop Sept. 14�15. Got the world on a string? Learn the �ber-classified backstage secrets of puppetry, make your own Sifl or Ollie, and see the pros work their magic. Not appropriate for children under five. Jarvis Conservatory, 1711 Main St., Napa. $10�$15. 707.255.5445. www.jarvisconservatory.com. Lizann Bassham & Darryl Fenley Sept. 18. The voice of Bassham and the piano sounds of Fenley create a cloud of nostalgic bliss. They will perform songs from the '20s, '30s and '40s, creating an eclectic and fun evening. This is a swinging event not to be missed. Sebastopol Center for the Arts, 6780 Depot St., Sebastopol. 7:30pm. $12. 707.829.4797. Hawaiian Tropical Nights Sept. 18. Would you rather be lying on a beach in Hawaii with a purple drink in hand, but can't quite make it to the Islands? Hawaiian Tropical Nights at the Napa Valley Opera House is just the solution. This fundraiser for the Manaleo Hawaiian Cultural Foundation pulls out all the Hawaiian flair. Look for hula performances along with the music of Kumu Hula Kawika Alfiche and Halau o Keikialii. Napa Valley Opera House, 1030 Main St., Napa. 8pm. $30�$35. 707.226.7372. Sonoma County Book Festival Sept. 19. The ninth annual book fest features readings and workshops by both local and national authors, a sure bet for any bookworm. Authors such as Izzy Rose, Dale Dougherty, Gerald Rosen, Barbara Baer and many more will be reading their work. Poetry and drama will also be featured throughout the day. Events located in downtown Santa Rosa at the Sonoma County Central Library, the Cultural Arts Council Gallery and Courthouse Square. 10am�4pm. Free. 707.527.5412. www.socobookfest.org. Ceres Community Project's Celebration & Fundraiser Sept. 19. The mission of the Ceres Community Project is to make good, nutritious and organic meals to those with serious illness while training and educating youngsters on how to cook and eat nourishing good food. The fundraiser event will take place in the gardens of Lynmar Winery while the jazz sounds of the Urban Professionals are carried on the air, and of course, there will be food provided by the organization, and plenty of wine from Lynmar, as well as Iron Horse, Skipstone, Alexander Valley Vineyard and many others. 6�9pm. Lynmar Winery 3909 Frei Road, Sebastopol. $50�$100 sliding scale. 707.829.3374. Napa Valley Aloha Festival Sept. 19. OK, so some of us have been there (or at least drooled over Aloha Travel commercials), but aside from the beautiful beaches and fruity drinks, what do we really know about Hawaii? The Manaleo Hawaiian Cultural Foundation hosts the first annual festival to celebrate and teach about Hawaiian native culture. Live music and dance, authentic foods, arts and crafts and a variety of vendors provide a bounty of delights for the senses. As this is a family event, alcoholic beverages are prohibited. Napa Valley Exposition, 575 Third St., Napa. 9am�6pm. Free; bring a canned food donation. 707.966.4017. Mill Valley Fall Arts Festival Sept. 19�20. The sculpture, painting, ceramics and photography of some 150 different artists is on display under the beautiful trees of Mill Valley. This festival, produced by artists, makes sure that all profits go to local schools, and charities. Also enjoy the music of Maria Muldaur and Her Red Hot Bluesiana Band, Tom Rigney and Flambeau and much more, all while taking in the sights and smells of fall as the majestic redwoods tower above. Old Mill Park, 320 Throckmorton Ave., Mill Valley. Sat. 10am�6pm, Sun. 10am�5pm. $5�$8; under 12, free. The 22nd annual Napa Valley Open Studios Sept. 19�20 and 26�27. Artists throughout the valley open their doors to the public. Sponsored by the Napa Valley Arts Council, the tours allow art lovers to peruse among various locations in and around gorgeous Napa Valley. www.artscouncilnapavalley.org. The Beach Boys Sept. 20. Old faces and new bolster the familiar harmonies of this ultimate surf band. 8pm. $29.50�$82.50. Wells Fargo Center, 50 Mark West Springs Road, Santa Rosa. 707.546.3600. The 12th Annual Petaluma Progressive Festival Sept. 20. The San Francisco Mime Troupe celebrates its 50th anniversary this year with a special performance of Too Big to Fail, while speakers include Antonia Juhasz (The Tyranny of Oil), Michael Parenti, Project Censored's Peter Phillips and other authors and informed folks. Steve Seskin is among the entertainers. Walnut Park, Sixth Street and Petaluma Boulevard South, Petaluma. Noon to 5pm. Free. 707.763.8134. www.progressivefestival.org. Glendi International Food Fair Sept. 20�21. Basically, this is the place to find chefs and other food-lovers walking around salivating like kids in a candy store. Accompanied by live Balkan music, this internationally influenced food festival rises to new heights. Ever been to Eritrea, Kenya or Romania? Be John Hiatt teams up with Lyle Lovett for a night of wit and charm, Oct. 14 at the Wells Fargo Center. transported with just one bite at the Protection of the Holy Virgin Orthodox Church, 90 Mountain View Ave., Santa Rosa. $6�$10; under 12, free. Those in the know plan to take food home. 707.584.9491. Elizabeth Gilbert Sept. 24. Eat, Pray, Love writer discusses her writing and spiritual adventures. Marin Center, 10 Avenue of the Flags, San Rafael. 8pm. $20�$45. 415.499.6800. Old Grove Festival Sept. 25�27. It's hard to find a better acoustic amphitheater than the one located at the heart of Armstrong Woods--exactly why the folks behind the third annual Old Grove Festival put it to good use. Chanticleer, known as an "orchestra of voices," make the redwoods sway on Sept. 25, while Maria Muldaur's Garden of Joy Jug Band performs on Sept. 26, and Don Neely and the Royal Society Jazz Orchestra get down on Sept. 27. Bring flashlights, seat cushions and warm clothes to the Redwood Forest Theatre, Armstrong Redwoods State Preserve, 14107 Armstrong Woods Road, Guerneville. $25�$40. 707.869.9403. Sebastopol Celtic Music Festival Sept. 25�27. The greatest Celtic musicians this side of the Emerald Isle do more than just fiddle around. The talent-packed lineup already includes Dervish from Ireland, V�sen from Sweden and Old Blind Dogs from Scotland. Martin Hayes and Dennis Cahill team up for the 15th year in a row! Sept. 25�27, 11am�6pm, Sebastopol Community Center, 390 Morris St., Sebastopol. $10�$500; 10 and under, free. 707.823.1511. Taste of Petaluma Sept. 26. Wine and food enthusiasts unite for a day of upscale culinary trick-or-treating at the third annual Taste of Petaluma event. Over 70 of Petaluma's finest restaurants, wineries, breweries and food purveyors gather to tempt guests with their talents. All profits go to benefit the Cinnabar Theater. Begin treating the taste buds at any of these three Petaluma locations: Putnam Plaza on Petaluma Boulevard; Gallery One, 209 Western Ave.; Haus Fortuna, 111 Second St. in the theater district. 11:30am. $40. 707.763.8920. www.tasteofpetaluma.org. Sonoma County Harvest Fair Awards Night Gala Sept. 26. Before the Harvest Fair kicks off, get a sneak peek at the best of what this year's festival has to offer. Sip and taste unlimited amounts of award-winning wines, olive oil and food. Admission price includes a commemorative glass and other schwag. Sonoma County Fairgrounds 1350 Bennett Valley Road, Santa Rosa. 8pm. $65. 707.545.4203. Earle Fest Sept. 26. A celebration of American music, this benefit for the Earle Baum Center livens up Santa Rosa with the music of Johnny Rawls and the Blues Defenders, Houston Jones, the Rhythm Rangers and the Mighty Chiplings, among others. There will be good old-fashioned barbecue and crisp beer provided by Lagunitas, as well as local wine and veggie and children's options to fill sun-warmed bellies. The Earle Baum Center of the Blind, 4539 Occidental Road, Santa Rosa. 12:30�6:30pm. $15�$18; children under 10, free. 707.523.3222. October Pink Martini Oct. 1. Mighty little orchestra from Portland melds jazz and cinema for a Hollywood-style spectacle. Wells Fargo Center for the Arts, 50 Mark West Springs Road, Santa Rosa. 8pm. $19.75�$49.75. 707.546.3600. Tap Dogs Oct. 2. Australian urban dance company that specialize in raw, high-energy performances do 90 minutes of what Seattle TV describes as "pure joy." Marin Center, 10 Avenue of the Flags, San Rafael. 8pm. $20�$50. 415.499.6800. 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN 29 The tracks lead to the: The Petaluma Arts Center "All Aboard"- Picture the Railroad, August 14-October 4 Sept 12, Noon - 3PM, Family Day- Kids art activities, Railroad contraptions from the Handcar Regatta, Caboose Restoration,music food and fun! (other happenings in Petaluma on this dayRiver Heritage Fair, Art in the Park..come for all three!) El Dia De Los Muertos- Flames of the HeartCelebrating all over town, October 17- November 2 Fall Art Classes for Kids and AdultsRegister Now! 230 Lakeville Road. 707 762-5600. www.PetalumaArtsCouncil.org Carlos Mencia Oct. 2. "Observational" comic comes straight outta TV to the former LBC. Wells Fargo Center, 50 Mark West Springs Road, Santa Rosa. 7:30pm. $41.50. 707.546.3600. Sonoma County Harvest Fair Oct. 2�4. Hit up the World Championship Grape Stomp competition, slurp some wine, hitch a hay ride or just get down to some swingin' jazz music at the Harvest Fair. Sonoma County Fairgrounds, 1375 Bennett Valley Road, Santa Rosa. $7. 707.545.4203. www.harvestfair.org. The 23rd Annual B.R. Cohn Charity Events Fall Music Festival Oct. 3�4. Vintner and philanthropist B. R. Cohn has raised over $5 million for various charities. This year's list includes the Santa Rosa Memorial Hospital, Boys and Girls Clubs Sonoma Valley, Bread and Roses and the Sonoma Valley Mentoring Alliance. The charity auction dinner and Sunday-afternoon concert are already soldout, as are the VIP tix for Saturday's show with the Doobie Brothers, Pablo Cruise, Little Feat and others, but general admission for Saturday is still available. Feel good while bobbing in time to the tunes and putting a perfect triple-eagle at the B.R. Cohn Winery Amphitheater, 15000 Sonoma Hwy., Glen Ellen. Oct. 3�4, noon�6pm. $95. 707.938.4064, ext. 127. www.brcohn.com. Marin Symphony Oct. 4. Opening-night gala focuses on "Rhapsody in Blue" replete with classy cocktails and Gershwin-era attire. Marin Center, 10 Avenue of the Flags, San Rafael. 5pm. Also, Oct. 6. 415.499.6800. Calabash! Oct. 4. A celebration of gourds, art and the garden, Calabash takes place at Food for Thought in Forestville. A silent auction and lovely exhibitions and demonstrations go on from 1pm to 5pm. Enjoy music played upon handmade gourd instruments while supporting a great cause. 6550 Railroad Ave., Forestville. $35�$40. 707.887.1647. Classic Film Series Oct. 4. Spreckels honors the classics beginning Oct. 4 with Casablanca, starring Humphrey Bogart and Ingrid Bergman moving giddily on to Frank Capra's Oscar-winning comedy It Happened One Night, (Oct. 11) starring Clark Gable and Claudette Colbert, and finishing the month with the Dashiell Hammett story of deception, greed and murder, The Maltese Falcon (Oct. 18), starring Humphrey Bogart and Mary Astor. Spreckels Performing Arts Center, 5409 Snyder Lane, Rohnert Park. $6. 707.588.3400. Emmylou Harris & Her Red Dirt Boys Oct. 6. Country songbird brings special guest Buddy Miller and the legacy of her 12 Grammys to town. Wells Fargo Center, 50 Mark West Springs Road, Santa Rosa. 8pm. $29.75-$69.75. 707.546.3600. Zopp� Italian Family Circus Oct. 8�11. Get ready for a good old-fashioned circus full of canines, comedy, clowns, audience participation and a slew of different circus characters and tricks. The Zopp� family sets up a 400-seat tent and puts on a one-ring circus that comes straight out of the Italian tradition. Napa Valley Opera House, 1030 Main St., Napa. 8pm. $30�$35. 707.226.7372. Annual Mill Valley Film Festival Oct. 8�18. Now in its 32nd year, this prestigious festival showcases over 150 independent films and bigger features destined for the multiplex. This year, British heartthrob Clive Owen is honored on Oct. 9, which means that British heartthrob Clive Owen will be walking our very streets. Sigh. Settle in for popcorn and fun at the Smith Rafael Film Center and CineArts@Sequoia. 415.383.5256. www.mvff.com. Big Oktoberfest Bash Oct. 9. The Sonoma County Museum gets down to our hop-growing/beer-drinking roots with a microbrew tasting fundraiser. A ticket gets you all the beer tastes you want, plus munchies and more. The DJ and the band have been sorted out; it's time to par-tee! Also, a raffle will be held for a chance to win a home brewing kit, among other awesome prizes. Santa Rosa Veterans Memorial Building, 1315 Maple Ave., Santa Rosa. 5�9pm. $30�$40. 707.579.1500. House of Floyd Oct. 10. The Ultimate Pink Floyd Tribute band pulls out all the stops with live renditions of Floyd's trippiest Wall-based stuff, as well as lasers, video and everything needed to recreate a classic music experience. Lincoln Theater, 100 California Drive, Yountville. 8pm. $20�$30. 707.944.1300. Joni Morris Oct. 10. Morris and After Midnight band play the songs of legendary ladies in country music, featuring the treasured songs of Kitty Wells, Loretta Lynn, Patsy Montana, Tammy Wynette and others brought back to life. Spreckels Performing Arts Center 5409 Snyder Lane, Rohnert Park. 8pm. $23�$26. 707.588.3400. Santa Rosa Symphony Oct. 10�12. Bruno Ferrandis conducts and former S.R. Symphony maestro Jeffrey Kahane plays piano as the symphony performs pieces by Miaskovsky, Rachmaninoff and Shostakovich. Wells Fargo Center, 50 Mark West Springs Road, Santa Rosa. $27�$55. 707.54.MUSIC. ARTrails Oct. 10�11 and 17�18. Self-guided opportunity to buy directly from artists and peek into their workspaces. Throughout Sonoma County. 10am to 5pm. Free. 707.579.2787. www.artrails.org. Lyle Lovett & John Hiatt Oct. 14. Two of the best, funniest, most lyrically clever and smartly deep singer-songwriters team up for a stellar night of jokes, stories and song. Wells Fargo Center, 50 Mark West Springs Road, Santa Rosa. 8pm. $29.75�$69.75. 707.546.3600. Lavay Smith & Her Red Hot Skillet Lickers Oct. 16�17. Gorgeous scoop of ice cream with a dreamy voice and a vixen spirit brings her big band of hepcats in for a twonight stand in the intimate environs of the Carston Cabaret. Wells Fargo Center, 50 Mark West Springs Road, Santa Rosa. $20. 707.546.3600. Bioneers Conference Oct. 16�18. Hear about groundbreaking ideas and discuss building a blueprint for sustainable systems at the 18th annual Bioneers Conference, a meeting of environmentally focused minds. 30 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN Featured speakers include Dr. Andrew Weil, Michael Pollan and myriad others. Marin Center, 10 Avenue of the Flags, San Rafael. $140�$410. 877.246.6337. www.bioneers.org. American Philharmonic Oct. 17�18. The 11th season of this semi-pro orchestra opens with a tribute to Russian, featuring John Kendall Bailey as the guest conductor leading the band in works by Shostakovich, RimskyKorsakoff, Stravinsky Borodin and others. Wells Fargo Center, 50 Mark West Springs Road, Santa Rosa. Free. 707.546.3600. Complexions Contemporary Ballet Oct. 21. Multicultural dance company founded by former Alvin Ailey dancer melds classical with the popular, the modern with the hip-hop. Wells Fargo Center, 50 Mark West Springs Road, Santa Rosa. 8pm. $25�$45. 707.546.3600. Pinot on the River Oct. 22�25. Fully immerse yourself in a weekend of Pinot Noir, including in-depth tastings and seminars, vineyard tours and sumptuous food. Various venues in the Russian River Valley. Sunday boasts a grand artisanal tasting. $65; all-access ticket, $750. 707.922.1096. Stephen Sondheim Oct. 24. One of the most important artists of the American stage appears in conversation with Peter Stein to hash his past accomplishments and his creative process in a wide-ranging discussion. Wells Fargo Center, 50 Mark West Springs Road, Santa Rosa. $49�$69. 707.546.3600. Spanish Harlem Orchestra Oct. 27. Grammy-winning big band featuring vintage salsa and a full-bodied big band style. Wells Fargo Center, 50 Mark West Springs Road, Santa Rosa. $20�$40. 707.546.3600. David Sedaris Oct. 29. Famed humorist is even more fun in person, and whatever he chooses to talk about is OK with us. Marin Center, 10 Avenue of the Flags, San Rafael. 8pm. $35. 415.499.6800. Healdsburg Wine Country Half Marathon Oct. 31. Explore the hearts of Alexander and Dry Creek valleys by fleet foot. The crisp fall weather is ideal for running, and Halloween enthusiasts are encouraged to don costumes. Finish at Lake Sonoma and recreation area for the Wine and Music Festival. 300 Via Archimedes Road, Geyserville. 7:15am. $25�$80. www.runhealdsburg.com. November MacHomer Nov. 1. Rick Miller's seriously goofy adaptation of Shakespeare's Macbeth is sure to make Shakespeare roll over in his grave--not out of horror, but because he is tickled with delight. Miller performs the classic tragedy using the voices of some 50 Simpsons' characters, in an assured crowdpleaser. Lincoln Theater, 100 California Drive, Yountville. $29�$39. 5pm. 707.944.1300. Marin Symphony Nov. 1 and 3. Violinist Elizabeth Pitcairn performs evening of Vivaldi on her 1720 Stradivarius. Novelist Barbara Quick joins maestro Alasair Neale preconcert to discuss her novel Vivaldi's Virgins. Marin Center, 10 Avenue of the Flags, San Rafael. 7:30pm. $29�$70. 415.499.6800. Pilobolus Nov. 6. Amazing human forms form and reform into all manner of witty and poignant configurations when this unique dance company performs. Marin Center, 10 Avenue of the Flags, San Rafael. 8pm. $20�$75. 415.499.6800. Festival of Harps Nov. 7. Now in its 20th year, the festival this time features multicultural lineup from China to Ireland to Paraguay to West Africa, featuring Youssoupha Sidibe on kora, the Bindi Society, Dinana Stork, Teed Rockwell and others. Spreckels Performing Arts Center, 5409 Snyder Lane, Rohnert Park. $22�$26. 707.588.3400. The 11th Annual Food & Wine Affair Nov. 7�8. Russian River Wine Road gathers 64 local wineries for another delicious extravaganza. Various locations in Alexander, Dry Creek and Russian River valleys. 11am� 4pm. $25�$60. 800.723.6336. Santa Rosa Symphony Nov. 7�9. Cellist Julie Albers joins the symphony in an allDvor�k slate that includes his "New World Symphony." Wells Fargo Center, 50 Mark West Springs Road, Santa Rosa. $27�$55. 707.54.MUSIC. Ian Anderson Nov. 10. Freaky flutist performs an all-acoustic night of major Jethro Tull soundage. Wells Fargo Center, 50 Mark West Springs Road, Santa Rosa. $29.75�$69.75. 707.546.3600. John Cleese Nov. 11. The Monty Python star, writer, actor and comedian makes a sureto-be memorable appearance this fall. Cleese has been an active comedian and actor for decades in such films as A Fish Called Wanda and, recently, James Bond and Harry Potter movies. Importantly, this iconic, dynamic, tall British fellow will make us laugh on a chilly November evening. Lincoln Theater, 100 California Drive, Yountville. $39�$69. 7pm. 707.944.1300. Buddy Guy & Elvin Bishop Nov. 13. Hall of Famer performs lightning in a bottle--and auditorium--with West Marin's own Elvin Bishop. Marin Center, 10 Avenue of the Flags, San Rafael. 8pm. $25�$75. 415.499.6800. Champions of the Dance Nov. 16. Professional hoofers from Dancing with the Stars, American Ballroom Challenge and Strictly Come Dancing perform live show, featuring everything from Latin to waltz. Wells Fargo Center, 50 Mark West Springs Road, Santa Rosa. $25�$45. 707.546.3600. Lisa Lampanelli Nov. 20. The Queen of Mean is proud of her website address: insultcomic.com. Be sure to get a seat well back from the stage. Wells Fargo Center, 50 Mark West Springs Road, Santa Rosa. $42.75. 707.546.3600. Judy at Carnegie Hall Nov. 21�22. We might have preferred to hear Rufus Wainwright do it, but understand how most would prefer Debbie Gravitte's impersonation of Judy Garland's historic comeback concert, with support from the Santa Rosa Symphony as part of their Pops series. Wells Fargo Center, 50 Mark West Springs Road, Santa Rosa. $30�$70. 707.546.3600. Denis Lindsay contributed to this roundup. Eavesdrop on 13 brilliant conversationalists KRCB presents Great Conversations Great Conversations is a series featuring distinguished authors, each recognized in an area of prominence and each uniquely paired with an interviewer. Fridays at 9 PM September 4 � Malcolm Gladwell and Daniel Pink September 11 � Elizabeth Gilbert and ZZ Packer September 18 � Michael Kinsley and James Surowieck September 25 � John Updike and Robert Siegel Malcolm Gladwell TUNE IN! Elizabeth Gilbert Channel 22 Broadcast Satellite Cable Presented by: TICKETS ON SALE NOW SonomaWineCountryWeekend.com or call (800) 939-7666 for information Visa Signature � cardholders receive special perks and savings. THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 31 The Hess Collection has just installed `Surface Tension,' its newest piece by Andy Goldsworthy. Looking ahead to the walls this fall By Gretchen Giles ake a green leaf, spit on it, add a yellow leaf. Take a rock, cover it in flower petals. Regardless--photograph it. What Scottish artist Andy Goldsworthy does sounds simple, yet it's anything but simplistic. Just ask Hess Collection museum director Robert Ceballos, whose gallery, situated above the Hess Winery's tasting room and gardens, recently acquired Surface Tension, a new Goldsworthy composed of chestnut leaf stalks solely held together with hawthorn thorns. "I went to storage and opened it up and it was a bunch of sticks; I thought that they were cuttings from a grapevine," he laughs. Purchased from a Bay Area gallery, Surface Tension joins the Hess' other works by Goldsworthy--Rock Pools (rocks melted in a kiln turning from sedimentary to igneous); Torn Stones (a video of the rocks melting); and Snowball Drawings (works on paper created when snowballs filled with pigments from California pine seeds and manzanita were allowed to melt)--making this the largest public Goldsworthy collection on the West Coast. Not every North Bay museum or gallery can show the work of acclaimed international land artists, but that doesn't mean that the bar isn't set high this autumn. The Sonoma Valley Museum of Art hosts its "Art Biennial 2009," running through Nov. 29, an exhibit juried by gallerist Susan Cummins, SSU art professor Michael Schwager and painter Frances McCormack. According to new SVMA executive director Kate Eilertsen, some 300 artists applied for the 48 eventual slots. Speaking of Schwager, his University Art Gallery hosts "Used" Sept. 10-Oct.18, featuring five California artists working with nontraditional materials and readymades. Think Duchamp and then think beyond. Nov. 5�Dec. 13, the university holds its annual juried student show, flipping it from its usual spot in the spring. The Marin Museum of Contemporary Art, a somewhat hidden jewel in the newly developed Hamilton area, hosts rock treasure Stanley Mouse in its second "Legends of the Bay Area" exhibit, running Sept. 26�Nov. 1; last year, it saluted painter Frank Lobdell. Mouse's show is subtitled "The Evolution of Stanley Mouse" and features everything from his famed screaming auto sketches to his rock poster art to his more serious and thoughtful nude studies. Following Mouse is the museum's annual "Art by the Inch" fundraiser (Nov. 14), in which high-quality paper is stretched around the gallery walls and several artists collaborate to cover it. The public then snips what they want from the finished piece, paying $1 an inch for the work. Talk about your hidden jewels, the Bolinas Museum exactly fits that description, Bolinas residents being famously persnickety about being famous and regularly stealing their town's sign marker from Highway 1. The museum's annual fundraiser (Sept. 19) is again slated for Susie and Mark Buell's "Peace Barn," and work is currently on preview at the museum for those interested in bidding. To enliven the auction, the amount of work on offer has been halved from the usual 80 pieces to just 40 this year. Assistant director Elia Haworth promises "a longer party and a shorter auction," adding that the food will be wonderful." It's West Marin; we believe her. Opening Oct. 3 is "Going Origami: From Art to Math to Science and Beyond" using the wisdom of physicists and other scientists in paper bending. Starting Nov. 20, look for work by surrealist Petaluma photographer 415.663.1347 WWW.GALLERYROUTEONE.ORG last chance to see The Box Show: Positively Magnetic Who: 150 Generous Artists What: Fundraiser/ Exhibition When: Dates: Till Sept. 13 Sunday, Sept. 13th CLOSING Party 2 to 3 pm LIVE AUCTION & Final Bidding begins at 3 pm Where: Gallery Route One 11101 Hwy 1, Point Reyes Michael Garlington and paintings by Chris Hellman, philanthropist and Hardly Strictly Bluegrass founder Warren Hellman's wife and a fine painter in her own right. The Sonoma County Museum continues its annual "Artistry in Wood" exhibit through Sept. 20, opening "Envisioning the World: The First Printed Maps 1472�1700" on Oct. 2 and running through Jan. 17. Drawn from a different section of the huge Wendt family cartographic collection that exhibited at the museum some five years ago, this grouping of 30 ancient maps focuses on post-Renaissance Europe. A new Smithsonian member, the museum is now also the home of Kathryn Hasting's WordTemple poetry series featuring wellregarded writers reading and in discussion. The innovative Headlands Center for the Arts explores the idea of Utopia for 2010 by starting a new series of discussions on group dynamics as found in communal living and communal art-making with "Becoming Commons" held in the mess hall on Oct. 24; eating an insanely good dinner is part of it. The fall open house--in which the artists in residence as well as those who rent studio space open their studios to the public--is slated for Oct. 18, and installation artists participate in a "Minimal / Maximal" discussion on Nov. 15. The Arts Council of Sonoma County's exhibit room, ArtSpace404, shows work from each of the 141 participating ARTrails artists Sept. 25�Oct. 23, allowing the public to get a taste of the work on offer when these artists throughout Sonoma County throw open their doors to the public Oct. 10�11 and 17�18. Last year's ARTrails generated some $375,000 in sales and almost 4,000 visitors. The Graton Gallery in West County supplements the ArtSpace404 exhibit with extra work by ARTrails participants. Nov. 6� Dec. 11 finds "Essensual Delights," a group show examining the North Bay's physical environment with painter and 2006 emerging artist awardee Catherine J. Richardson, textile artist Sasha Duerr and found-object artist Corey Hitchcock. The council hosts its Achievement in the Arts dinner on Sept. 26 at the Santa Rosa Golf and Country Club, this year honoring wine executive and philanthropist Barbara Banke for her work with youth in establishing the Sonoma Country Day School and the Sonoma Academy high school programs. The Arts Council Napa Valley Open Studios run Sept. 19�20 and 26�27, featuring 88 artists in 59 studios. For the second year, this is a juried exhibit. Filmmaker Eleanor Coppola and former ambassador Kathryn Hall are co-chairs. Napa comes into its own! The Napa Valley Museum continues its "Portals to the Past" history exhibit through Oct. 4. On Oct. 9, the space shifts focus dramatically, opening "Corpus Perspicuous: Body Transparent," work by Bay Area artists Cheryl Calleri, Tobin Keller and Thekla Hammond that examines the human form in a manner of media running through Nov. 18. The di Rosa Preserve prepares for its annual yowza auction, previewing work from 50 different artists, most of them collected by founder Rene di Rosa, Oct. 2�15, with the auction slated for Oct. 17, and featuring donations from Deborah Oropallo, William T. Wiley, Richard Shaw, Enrique Chagoya and a full slate of Big Art Names. Oct. 31�Jan. 23, the Preserve digs into its vaults with the help of curator Chandra Cerrito to present "Altered States," work related to the mystical, the transcendent and the transformative--not a bad way at all to approach the autumn. 32 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN UPCOMING EVENTS: September 4 Opening Reception for Dissolution/Resolution: Painting & Performance, Karina Nishi Marcus, Suzanne Edminster, Sasha Pepper and Eliot Fintushel, 5-8pm. Walk downtown to First Fridays on Fourth from 4-8pm. Courthouse and Railroad Squares will be filled with artists, crafters and music with additional activities at the Sonoma County Museum, firstfridaysonfourth.com September 5 & 12 Eliot Fintushel performs Baudelaire - Love and Lust, 8 poems from the Flowers of Evil in French and English, $10 to $10 or pay what you can. Please visit santarosaartsdistrict.com for a comlete listing of events SAUSALITO ART FESTIVAL America's #1 Fine Art Festival OVER 20,000 WORKS OF ART, FINE WINES, GOURMET FOOD, AND CHILDREN'S ACTIVITIES MUSICAL PERFORMANCES BY . . . SATURDAY / NIGHT RANGER, ENGLISH BEAT AND TAINTED LOVE SUNDAY / JOHNNY WINTER AND THE FABULOUS THUNDERBIRDS WOODSTOCK REVISITED MONDAY / JEFFERSON STARSHIP, CANNED HEAT, QUICKSILVER MESSENGER SERVICE, BIG BROTHER AND THE HOLDING COMPANY TICKET TICKETS ON SALE NOW AT WWW.SAUSALITOARTFESTIVAL.ORG L.ORG Take The Golden Gate Ferry from the San Francisco Ferry Building (near Embarcadero Bart Station) The Blue & Gold Ferry from San Francisco's pier 41 / Fisherman's Wharf ALL LABOR DAY WEEKEND, SEPT 5 - SEPT 7 THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 33 Tickets for Metallica's Sept. 11 Marin Center show currently range from $170 to $1,000 on Craigslist. North Bay music galore for the next three months By Gabe Meline f you're looking to buy a scalped Metallica ticket for their show at the Marin Center (Sept. 11), be warned: Ticketmaster isn't sending out hard tickets until just a few days prior to the show. As with any scalped ticket, don't fork over any cash until you have a hard ticket in hand, and avoid those hawking printed-out "e-tickets" at all costs. The band's first show in Marin--at a small 1,800-seat venue, no less--is a scammer's dream. Be patient, play it smart and you might just get in. Also down in Marin, 142 Throckmorton has Scaring the Children, a supergroup of Bob Weir, Rob Wasserman and former Primus drummer Jay Lane in a benefit performance that includes special guest Jackie Greene (Sept. 12). Piano treasure Denny Zeitlin dazzles with jazz introspection (Nov. 15), and it's anyone's guess when Robin Williams will schedule a lastminute booking (five times in the last month alone), so keep checking the website. The historic Phoenix Theater has begun assembling a database of photos and flyers from the last 20 years in preparation for a book about the history of the venue. The Phoenix also brings back ska-punk favorites Reel Big Fish (Sept. 12), SoCal reggae-punk favorites Pepper (Sept. 27), Canadian jazzpunk veterans Nomeansno (Oct. 11), and bluegrass-punk trio the Devil Makes Three (Oct. 18). And since the Santa Rosa Police Department preemptively shut down last month's E-40 show at the Armory as concert organizers were setting up, citing permit issues, hip-hop finds a home in Petaluma again with rapper Devin the Dude and laidback dancehall singer Collie Buddz (Oct. 1). A couple blocks away, the Mystic Theatre boasts a strong fall lineup with Joan Osborne (Oct. 19). Ignore the sappy radio hit "One of Us"--her night there in 2002, right after her show-stealing turn in Standing in the Shadows of Motown, blew the roof off. Dave Alvin and the Guilty Women (an all-female backing band with noted local guitarist Nina Gerber) drop in adjacent to their appearance at the Hardly Strictly Bluegrass Festival (Oct. 2), and songwriting master and guitar wizard Richard Thompson, seemingly realizing that his shows always sell out, has booked two nights to satisfy the faithful (Dec. 2�3). Further fresh headliners at the theater include Jerry Jeff Walker (Sept. 19), Robert Cray (Sept. 21), and Ky-Mani Marley (Oct. 24). To call Sonny Landreth a slide guitarist is like calling Jackson Pollock a painter; the Louisiana phenomenon, hailed by Eric Clapton as "the most underestimated musician on the planet," appears at the Last Day Saloon (Oct. 24). Metal thrives at the Santa Rosa club with Meldrum (Sept. 10), Jetboy (Sept. 19) and Tantric (Oct. 3), and diehard fans of Sublime can get stoopid at not one but two separate Sublime tribute bands in one week with the Lou Dog Trio (Sept. 17) and the LBC (Sept. 25). George Porter Jr., the bassist of the Meters who sits alongside James Jamerson and Bernard Odum as a founding father of funk bass, has joined up with DJ Logic and former Miles Davis keyboardist Jason Miles in Global Noize, a cross-cultural hybrid coming to the Hopmonk Tavern during a heavy weekend (Sept. 19). The hangover will linger from the previous night's show with Soulive (Sept. 18) but should be cleared for the next night's show with the Meat Puppets (Sept. 20). Also on deck is kora master Youssoupha Sidbe (Sept. 11) and Kyle Hollingsworth from String Cheese Incident (Oct. 11). Sonoma State University's annual back-to-school concert this year features Groundation (Oct. 13), a coming home for the reggae group that was founded in SSU's jazz program and that has since toured the world. (Groundation's raspy-voiced singer Harrison Stafford actually taught the first California-accredited course on the History of Reggae Music at the University from 1999� 2001.) At the Casbar in Santa Rosa, which has been booming with top-name reggae headliners lately (the Mighty Diamonds, Mad Professor), Jamaican reggae sensation Tanya Stephens serenades what's sure to be a packed house (Sept. 4). More known for performing in forests, sheds and Sebastopol, the barrel-voiced Iowa songwriting genius Greg Brown stops in wine country at the Napa Valley Opera House (Nov. 14), just one month after Gordon Lightfoot (Oct. 17). Quasiinternational NPR darlings Pink Martini play the Opera House's "Shaken, Not Stirred" fundraising gala (Oct. 3); full gala tickets including dinner start at $350, although select performance-only tickets will go on sale for $65 on Sept. 3. Just north, at the Lincoln Theater in Yountville, the town known for the French Laundry gets its fill of gumbo and crawfish pie with Buckwheat Zydeco (Sept. 12) and white bread and apple pie with Jay and the Americans (Sept. 18). Rumors are aswirl regarding the music lineup for Santa Rosa's Handcar Regatta (Sept. 27), fueled by Les Claypool's involvement in this year's event and Tom Waits' incognito attendance at last year's steampunk soiree. While the grapevine overflows, confirmed acts include the Pirate Band, Baby Seal Club, Loretta Lynch, the Jungle Love Orchestra, Gabby La La, Uni and her Ukelele and more. Konocti Harbor continues to be country-music central, with Dierks Bentley (Sept. 27), Brooks & Dunn (Oct. 2) and Rascal Flatts (Oct. 17-18). Healdsburg continues to be jazz central, as the Healdsburg Jazz Festival books the outstanding Trio 3 with Oliver Lake, Andrew Cyrille and Reggie Workman (Nov. 3). Nadja Salerno-Sonnenberg performs Bach with the New Century Chamber Orchestra at the Osher Marin Jewish Community Center (Sept. 13), the Napa Valley Symphony welcomes Doc Severinsen (Oct. 24), and the Russian River Chamber Music Society presents its international series premiere with the Shanghai Quartet (Oct. 2) at the Healdsburg Community Church as well as a layman's guide to classical music at the Bear Republic Brewing Co. with Bach, Beer and Burgers (Sept. 20). 34 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN UPCOMING TO SEBASTOPOL COMMUNITY CULTURAL CENTER CHERYL WHEELER WITH KENNY WHITE SAT. SEPT. 19 � GIRLYMAN FRI. NOV. 6 INFO: SEBASTOPOL COMMUNITY CULTURAL CENTER (707) 823-1511 � www.cumuluspresents.com TICKET OUTLETS - LAST RECORD STORE, PEOPLE'S MUSIC CelticFest-boh-box.indd 1 8/22/09 5:18 PM THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 35 SERVICES FOR MEN Men only clinic male provider & health educator Open Weds evenings 6�9pm call for Appointment � Condoms � Confidential HIV/Aids Testing and Counseling � Confidential Sexually Transmitted Disease Testing and Treatment � Physicals Philadelphia's Arden Theatre Company premiered `My Name Is Asher Lev' last year. Southwest Community Health Center 751 Lombardi Court, Santa Rosa www.swhealthcenter.org 707.547.2222 Tempests, time-travel, puppets and more stride the boards this fall By David Templeton rom time-traveling Victorian butterfly hunters to time-traveling Spanish-speaking immigrants; from shipwrecked sailors fending off the attacks of benevolent wizards to eccentric social anarchists fending off attacks from the IRS; from philosophical Iraqi expatriates to culture-challenging Jewish artists, the local theater scene looks to be a fascinating autumnal parade of chance, risk, individuality and danger. Eric Overmyer's offbeat `On the Verge,' sets sail at Petaluma's Cinnabar Theater Sept. 25� Oct. 11, following three pith-helmeted Victorian explorers (local favorites Liz Jahren, Laura Jorgenson and Jessica Powell) as they head into the jungle in 1888 and find themselves journeying through time, skipping inexplicably about the globe, wielding knives and net, and dropping eloquent one-liners all along the way. Across their universe, the curiositydriven trio encounter a series of unusual humans, trolls and yetis, all played by one amorphous actor (Tim Kniffin). Best known as the writer and producer behind such television shows as Homicide: Life on the Streets and The Wire, Overmeyer's mindbending script makes language the key. A coproduction with the Sixth Street Playhouse, this show will make its own leap across time and geography when it moves to the Studio at Sixth Street for another run in late October. The time-traveling theme continues with the Imaginists' world premiere of `Extranjeros de la Propia Tierra' (Aliens of the Land Itself), a production of Project 104, created in collaboration with the Graton Day Labor Center. The show, running Sept.17�19 and 24�26, looks to continue the daring, experimental theater that has become the hallmark of Santa Rosa's Imaginists Theatre Collective. Set in a "mythical desert," the Spanish-English comedy-drama-fantasy involves a magical passage through which a band of home seekers travel back and forth through time. The story's more fantastical elements apparently include a talking shoe and a flood-challenged courtroom, and was created by the performers as an exploration of immigrant and social rights issues. In Railroad Square, the Sixth Street Playhouse presents a very different spin on time-traveling, taking us back to 1930s America with Moss Hart and George S. Kaufman's beloved `You Can't Take It with You,' playing Oct. 2�25. Featuring a large cast that includes John Craven, Joe Winkler, Peter Warden, Chris Murphy, Keith Baker and Elly Lichenstein, You Can't Take It with You gives us the eccentric Sycamore family. Apparently nuts up and down the family tree, the Sycamores experience a societal road block when they are investigated for tax evasion at the same time that the youngest (and sanest) daughter falls in love with the son of a straight-laced businessman. The comedy explores the true madness of the American dream, asking if love, devotion and individual expressions aren't, in fact, more sane than the blind pursuit of normalcy. Over in Sebastopol, the Sonoma County Repertory Theatre continues its annual Shakespeare festival with a wildly innovative adaptation of `The Tempest,' running Sept. 18� Oct. 18. Created by mask-and-puppet mastermind Conrad Bishop, this production combines live actors and puppets, digital projections and shadow imagery with an original musical score by Elizabeth Fuller, emphasizing the "puppet master" nature of the banished magician Prospero as he conjures the titular tempest and pulls the The Coyote Den Bar & Dance Hall Twice As Good Saturday, September 5th � 8pm Rockin' Blues J. Scott Evans � Country September 12th � 8pm Lacy J. Dalton � Country September 19th � 8pm Thursday Night KARAOKE � 8:30pm $100 Cash Drawing 5 miles North of Ukiah, Hwy 101 � West Road Exit, Ukiah www.coyotevalleycasino.com 707-485-0700 36 09.02.09-09.08.09 strings that will bring his enemies onto the shores of his island home. The buzz is already deafening, as word spreads that this visual, magical enterprise is turning out to be a true theatrical eyeful, full of jaw-dropping splendor and playful trickster surprises. And speaking of surprises, actress Denise Elia had hoped to revisit the one-woman play `9 Parts of Desire' by Heather Raffo. Ever since taking on the gargantuan nine-role Parts last year (in a production at the Sixth Street Playhouse that won her a Bay Area Theater Critics Circle nomination for Best Actress), Elia has been imagining a return to the one-of-a-kind show, a poetic exploration of the lives of nine Iraqi women, before and after the fall of Saddam. Just a few weeks ago, Elia announced that, with her new found RIOT theater company, and the sponsorship of the Sonoma County Peace and Justice Center, she'll be tackling the show again. The piece now features a fresh, new polish of the script, offered up by playwright Raffo, with whom Elia has formed a strong friendship since first discovering the play. Co-directed by Elia and Maria Magdalena Giordano, the show runs for eight performances, beginning (by judicious design) on Sept. 11, running through Sept. 27. All performances take place at the Glaser Center in Santa Rosa. Following a summer of Wild West Shakespeare, Santa Rosa's increasingly visible Narrow Way Stage Company takes its youthpowered vision and energy to the Studio at Sixth Street Playhouse with a three-weekend run of Laurence Fishburne's hip-hop-fueled drama `Riff Raff.' Originally written for three black actors, Fishburne (yep, Orpheus himself has written a play!) makes it clear in the forward that he envisions actors of all colors and ages performing the show, though Narrow Way may be the first company to do it. With a rotating cast of six actors, every performance will be different as new faces cycle in and out of the show about three urban friends attempting to survive the mean, uncompromising streets of the city. Directed by Adam Palafox, who trained with San Francisco's legendary Campo Santo theater ensemble, Riff Raff runs Sept.25�Oct. 11. In Marin, the ever-excellent Marin Theatre Company kicks off its new season with the stage adaptation of Chaim Potock's celebrated `My Name Is Asher Lev.' With a script by Aaron Posner, the play, directed by Hal Brooks, details the emotional journey of a Jewish painter, raised in the strict Hasidic community, as he finds himself torn between the faith of his fathers and his own overpowering drive to make a name as an artist. If the play is as moving, wise and insightful as the novel, the MTC production could be a significant theatrical event. Finally, the Ross Valley Players celebrate their 80th anniversary with the Bay Area premiere of `Premiere,' a comedy by the late, great Dale Wasserman (best known for his stage adaptation of One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest). Running Sept. 11�Oct. 11, this farcical comedy follows what happens when a desperate playwright fabricates a "lost" manuscript by William Shakespeare. When it becomes a worldwide sensation, he cannot of course convince the skeptical critics that he is the true author. Theatrical adventurers will be wise to mark their calendars now. As several of this fall's stage characters will attest, time has a way of skipping right past the best laid, and best played, plans. THE BOHEMIAN Roald Dahl's `Fantastic Mr. Fox' gets the full Clooney. Docs and pox mark the new cinema season By Richard von Busack bring news of cinematic destruction. This season is skewed toward apocalypse and messages of planetary peril. Once the summer's over, the fall crop of films is guaranteed to send people back to school, whether they're students or not. Such is the result of a plethora of documentaries and film festivals trying to fill in the blank spaces Hollywood and the Murdochified news leave out. The big-name prestige items are all in place, though. `A Serious Man' (Oct. 2) is the new Coen Brothers offering, another sort of noncomedy set in a cow college, where a physics professor (Michael Stuhlbarg) gets the works from students, family and friends. George Clooney is back in the Wes Anderson-Noah Bambauch stop-motion animation `Fantastic Mr. Fox' (Nov. 13), which features two filmmakers who have a bit of trouble getting over their childhoods doing an out-and-out children's story by Roald Dahl. Clooney in fox form seems right; so does Bill Murray as a badger. But the really big box office should go to `New Moon' (Nov. 20), the sequel to Twilight, featuring the steadily improving Kristen Stewart. Since anyone will flock to see vampires doing anything, more bloodsuckers bare their fangs in `Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant' (Oct. 23), with the everamusing John C. Reilly as a vamp. Megan Fox stars as a cannibal high school chick in the Diablo Cody�scripted `Jennifer's Body' (Sept. 18). `Zombieland' (Oct. 9), a comedy, despite its dire title, co-stars Abigail Breslin among the munched and munchies. `The Road' (Oct. 16), John Hillcoat's adaptation of Cormac McCarthy's prestigious gut-muncher, is just the uplifting bummer you'd expect, even if the zombie ogres in it aren't per se zombies, just post-apocalyptic cannibals. Viggo Mortensen limps through the action, indomitable. Only Abe "Grandpa" Simpson could properly read aloud McCarthy's lamentations and Biblical warnings. We're doomed, I tells ya! As one can see from the nuclear winter, piled-up human skulls and weird product placements for Coke and Jack Daniels in The Road, Earth really has it coming. `2012' (Nov. 13) gives Deutschland's Duke of Demolition a chance to blow up the planet as John Cusack looks properly aghast when the ancient Mayan prophecy is fulfilled, and we all lose our cleaning deposit. `Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs' (Sept. 18) has a rogue inventor nigh destroying the planet with good intentions. The CGI-animated `9' (Sept. 9), not to be confused with the Rob Marshall musical `Nine' (Nov. 25) or District 9, may be one of the year's highlights, considering how adultfriendly and compulsively watchable Coraline and Up were. In a wasteland long after the age of man, mechanical/biotic creatures quest for the secret of life. `Planet 51' (Nov. 20) is like a comedy version of Ray Bradbury's "Mars Is Heaven!" with a planet full of 1950s suburban aliens. More plausible demolition--the attempted crushing of one fat girl in late 1980s Harlem--takes place in the acclaimed but dire indie `Precious' (Nov. 6), the adaptation of single-monikered novelist Sapphire's Push. It's a realist film with Italian touches: a bit of Juliet of the Spirits flavoring and a clip from De Sica's Two Women. A drab-looking Mariah Carey, as a seemingly sensitive social worker, and a very good Mo'Nique as the world's worst mom, beg us not to judge them. Too bad director Lee Daniels is judge, jury and executioner. Oprah is going to weep buckets. As the film year progresses, I'm finding that documentaries and cartoons are what look the most promising. The dramas take place in a televisionized vacuum of prosperity, as unrelated to 2009 realities as the escapist comedies of the 1930s were to the Great Depression. "Energy and the World" is the theme of the stalwart UNAFF Film Festival, running Sept. 30 in Sonoma County. The lineup this year is particularly strong. Slated is `The Garden,' the riveting true story of a fight over a community garden in south Los Angeles; `The Age of Stupid,' starring Pete Postlethwaite as a man of the mid�21st century looking back at us, his stupid globalwarming-denying grandfathers. Also on view will be Sally Ingleton's `Seed Hunter,' about the search for heirlooms, and `The Yes Men Fix the World,' a sprightly documentary about two provocateurs who beard corporate suits in their dens. `Good Hair' (Oct. 23) by ace comedian Chris Rock takes its title from an AfricanAmerican expression; translated it means "as nonkinky as possible." People of color still spend millions on gross chemicals and expensive procedure. The old-time corrosive methods of hair relaxation--lye, gasoline or other caustics--have changed, but not the essential meaning of this war on nappiness. (Fun fact: Billie Holiday's trademark gardenia is something she picked up to cover a hole burned in her hair.) `Capitalism: A Love Story' (Oct. 2) is Michael Moore's bouquet to the only system that could ever possibly work, world without end, amen. Twenty years after the fall of the Berlin Wall--and the capitulation of the much-feared competition--the system is, well, just as you see it around you. Moore's focus is more on this last year right after Wall Street got the U.S. government to find its checkbook for them. Get out your handkerchiefs: Moore tells a sad tale of poverty-stricken CEOs and bankers mewling for sustenance like abandoned kittens. Speaking of our overlords, `Crude' (Sept. 25) is Joe Berlinger's documentary concerning the $27 billion lawsuit that Ecuadorian natives brought against Chevron and Texaco (the company Chevron engulfed). And `Earth Days' (Sept. 18) charts the almost 40 years of Earth Day celebrations, with notes on the eco movement from astronauts to biologists. And the almost-documentary `The Informant!' (Sept. 18) presents Steven Soderbergh's comedic version of a serious story about the unlikely whistleblower (played by Matt Damon) who helped nail Big Ag's Archer Daniels Midland. Similarly, `Men Who Stare at Goats' (Nov. 6) takes a true story and skews it a bit; it's based on Guardian reporter Jon Ronson's book about the U.S. Army's attempts to create psychic assassins and soldiers who can walk through walls like Sprite from the X-Men. In dutiful response to the calendar, Robert Zemeckis' adaptation of `A Christmas Carol' (Nov. 6) pushes back the unavoidable holiday six weeks with a performancecaptured animated version of Dickens, replete with Jim Carrey playing Scrooge and the three ghosts. The digitized London-- with a Big Ben under construction scaffolds--is essential to this extravaganza. And lastly, served up for Thanksgiving, `The Princess and the Frog' (Nov. 25)--a New Orleans�set version of "The Frog Prince" in traditional animation by Disney-- may either be the continuation of a 75-yearold tradition of quality cartooning or the tombstone of it. And do we want to live in a world without flat animation? STOMPY JONES Sat, Sept 6 Wed, Sept 2 8:45-9:45am; 5:45-6:45 Jazzercise 10am-12:15pm Scottish Dance Youth and Family 7:00-10:00pmSingles & Pairs Square Dance Club Thur, Sept 3 8:45-9:45am; 5:45-6:45pm Jazzercise 7:25-10:30pm Circles & Squares Square Dance Club Fri, Sept 4 8:45-9:45am Jazzercise 7:15pm DJ Steve Luther presents a NIGHTCLUB TWO STEP PARTY $10 Sat, Sept 5 8:00-9:00am; 9:15-10:15am Jazzercise 10:30-11:45am NEW!Salsa Workout with DJ Steve Luther 7:00pmLessons Steve Luther presents STOMPY JONES 8:00pm Dance the Bay Area's Favorite Swing Band $15 Sun, Sept 6 8:30-9:30am Jazzercise 10:15�11:15am Zumba Fitness with Anna 5:00�9:30pm DJ Steve Luther Country-Western Lessons & Dancing $10 Mon, Sept 7 8:45-9:45am; 5:45-6:45pm Jazzercise WEIGHTWATCHERS MEETING 3:30pm Weigh in 3:30, Meeting 4:00 7:00-10pm Scottish Country Dancing Tues, Sept 8 8:45-9:45am; 5:45-6:45pm Jazzercise 9:30am WEIGHTWATCHERS MEETING Weigh in 9:30, Meeting 10:00 7:15-9:00pm AFRICAN DANCE & WORLD MUSIC featuring West African & Congalese Dance Santa Rosa's Social Hall since 1922 1400 W. College Avenue � Santa Rosa, CA 707.539.5507 � www.monroe-hall.com 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN 37 Numina Center for Spirituality & the Arts Event Details, Times & Tickets: www.numinacenter.org 2009 Special Events OCTOBER 17-18 California Redwood Chorale American to Hungarian Directed by Daniel Canosa Featuring: David Manley, David Parsons, Paul Murray, Gary Foster & Bonnie Brooks "A Sweet Comic Embrace Taking Woodstock May Give You A Contact High!" � Newsweek "One of the Year's Best! TAKING WOODSTOCK A Radically Fierce & Funny Fireball!" � Rolling Stone (11:45) 2:15 Socko!" � Time "Sicko is 4:45 7:20 9:50 R "Extravagantly Entertaining Documentary! SICKO A Trove Of Footage Captured By The World's Finest A Film By Michael Moore Cin�ma V�rit� Camera Operators!" � NY Times On Two Screens! (12:00 1:00) 2:30 3:30 5:00 6:00 SOUL POWER 7:30 8:30 10:00 PG-13PG-13 (12:40) 2:45 5:00 7:30 9:40 No Passes Accepted "A Delicious Fable! Flat-Out Funny!" � NY Times Advance Tickets On Sale Now! (2:30) 7:00 PG-13 Acted!" Show Thu " Brilliantly No 7:00 � Fox-TV Vanessa Redgrave Meryl Streep Today Close "Blisteringly Funny!" � USA Glenn ToniIN THE Claire Danes Collette LOOP (12:00) 4:40 EVENING 4:40 Show Thu 9:10 NR No (1:15) 4:00 7:00 9:30 PG-13 "Delightful, Witty & Inventive!" � USA Today (12:45) and Riveting!" � Rolling Stone "Raw 3:00 5:15 7:40 9:45 PG-13 "Imagery Is Beyond Stunning!" � NY Observer A MIGHTY HEART (12:30) 2:45 5:00 7:20 9:45 R UNMISTAKEN CHILD (12:30) 2:40 7:10 NR "A Most Welcome Summer Treat!" � LA Times "A Triumph!" � New York Observer Bargain Tuesday - $7.50 All Shows Bargain Tuesday $7.00 All Shows Schedule for Fri, Sep-4th � Thu, Sep 10th Schedule for Fri, June 29th - Thu, July 5th COLD SOULS 500 DAYS OF SUMMER OCTOBER 30 & 31 All Saints Weekend The Season of Darkness Song, Poetry & Dance Expression of Our Shadow Selves Mask Making Workshop with Master Mask Maker Annie Hallatt & More! LA VIE9:20 PG-13 (4:50) EN ROSE (12:45) 3:45 6:45 9:45 PG-13 COMING IN JULY! LDEN DOOR LIVE Presentation NO RESERVATIONS ALK TO ME Saturday, September 12th at 11:30am ARCTIC TALE Click rialtocinemas.com or Call TIX 800 595-4849 ADAM The documentary `For the Bible Tells Me So' examines homosexuality in five religious familes, screening Sept. 8 at the SSU Student Union. See Film listing, p48. New Movies NOVEMBER 27 Art & Poetry for Advent Candlelit Service of Taize Chant & Healing Cultural Historian Kayleen Asbo & Robin O'Brien DECEMBER 18 Festival Consort Renaissance Christmas Concert DECEMBER 20 Solstice Celebration Details soon online! Not to be missed! 2009 Ongoing Events MONDAY EVENINGS Through the Ear to the Heart Sing the music of Hildegard von Bingen as Contemplative Practice - See web site 9/14 � FOURTH FRIDAYS Taize Caritas Slideshow followed by Candlelit Service of Taize Chant & Healing - See web site Also Playing Numina Center at the Episcopal Church of the Incarnation 550 Mendocino Ave., Santa Rosa 707.579.2604 38 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN Discover the film that critics are calling uniquely thought-provoking & hysterical! " DELICIOUS FABLE... A FOR NORTH BAY MOVIE TIMES, GO TO www.sonomamovietimes.com www.marinmovietimes.com www.napamovietimes.com flat-out funny." Cold Souls a soul searching comedy. � 2008 Chick Pea Films, LLC. All RIghts Reserved Paul Giamatti Stephen Holden, THE NEW YORK TIMES NOW PLAYING! CHECK THEATRE DIRECTORIES OR CALL FOR SHOWTIMES coldsoulsthemovie.com RIALTO CINEMAS LAKESIDE 551 Summerfield Road, Santa Rosa (707) 525-4840 cameo fine arts presents La Fille du Regimente september 12 at 11:00 am encore: september 20 at 11:00 am Royal Opera House: covent garden, london premiere: Film capsules by Richard von Busack and Jeff Latta. WWW.CAMEOCINEMA.COM THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 39 Team PRO Event proudly presents FREE FREE ADMISSION ADMISSION SAT. 11 AM - 6 PM FOURTH ST SAN RAFAEL THE GREATEST BLUES SEPT. 12th ockiki'n' R on & Co BBQ BREWS AUSTIN DE LONE'S R&B-B-Q Review CHARLIE MUSSELWHITE Sugar Pie DeSanto DELTA WI RES J .C. S MI TH BAND Promoting and Supporting the Richard deLone Special Housing Project and Prader-Willi Syndrome Research For more info www.teamproevent.com �2009 Produced by Team PRO Event, Mill Valley, CA 40 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN A Little Bit Taller Pop-rap can be a funny little cottage industry. In a subgenre defined by "Ice Ice Baby" and "U Can't Touch This," it's also included surprisingly great material like "Bust a Move" and "Mama Said Knock You Out." So while we ruminate on Jazzy Jeff, on House of Pain, on Tone Loc and Naughty by Nature, let us also tip a hat to the 1995 hit "I Wish," by Skee-Lo, who soared up the charts by telling us that he wished he was a little bit taller and, furthermore, that he was a baller. Over 14 years later, the Los Angeles rapper, away from the game for the last nine years, opens for local Santa Rosa rap group At All Costs on a Thursday night. His upcoming album, Overdose, hopes to at least put him at top billing next time he comes around. Do the running man and wish along with him when he appears on Thursday, Sept. 3, at the Last Day Saloon. 120 Fifth St., Santa Rosa. 9:30pm. $10�$12. 707.545.2343. Fiyo on the Bayou Two undisputed rulers of New Orleans music? On one bill? In a tiny, intimate theater? That's exactly what's in store when Dr. John and the Neville Brothers pull out all the swampy stops the Napa Valley this Labor Day. Dr. John, who has a voice begging almost as much as Aaron Neville's to be parodied (quick television reference: Family Guy's "Aaron Neville megaphone"), carries with him a complex detachment in person--either he's completely bored of playing "Right Place, Wrong Time" or he's just the coolest dude in the world. The fact he plays both organ and piano at the same time, straddling the bench, makes us opt for the latter. The Neville Brothers, unfairly overshadowed by key member Aaron's solo success, never fail to pull people out of their seats. The two legends appear on Monday, Sept. 7, at the Napa Valley Opera House. 1030 Main St., Napa. 7pm. $95�$110. 707.226.7372. I Remember He was a member of the Petaluma Jak's skateboard team, a guitarist for the band Free Cowboy Hats, a constant presence behind the concession stand at the Phoenix Theater and a tireless supporter of local bands. More than this, Kristof "Goose" Gross was one of the most sincere and kind-hearted people I've known. His funeral in Mill Valley this year brought people together in beer salutes and songs, but what he really would have loved was knowing that MDC, one of his favorite punk bands, would agree to play a remembrance for him. In 1988, MDC played the Cotati Cabaret, where singer Dave Dictor stripped off his clothes and traded underwear with a girl; last year in Santa Rosa, they were polite as your mom. Kristof, of course, took pictures, smiled and sang along in the front row the entire time. It's a fitting tribute when MDC play with Litany for the Whale, Fistifuks and Semi-Evolved Simians on Sunday, Sept. 6, at the North Bay Film and Art Collective. 99 Sixth St., Santa Rosa. 7pm. $7. 707.542.2925. Les Monstreux Fresh from a residency at Alasdair Fraser's summer fiddle camp, fiddle maestro and instructor Darol Anger brings his Monster String Quartet this weekend to West Marin. The "monsters" in this case are three young girls in their 20s: Lauren Rioux, Brittany Haas and Natalie Haas. The sisters Haas are known best for their work with the Boston bluegrass band Crooked Still, while Rioux, from Scarborough, Maine, has a private studio of fiddle students age five to 65. All three girls have been students of Anger and members of his acclaimed Republic of Strings project. See what the stripped-down version comes up with when they pull, chop and bend the strings on Saturday, Sept. 5, at the Dance Palace. 503 B St., Point Reyes Station. 8pm. $5�$20. 415.663.1075. THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 41 Concerts Local mid-'90s bands reunite for Nostalgia Fest onoma County in the mid-'90s was a magical place for music, if you could find it. Long before MySpace, bands photocopied fliers and risked vandalism fines by stapling them to telephone poles in the hope of getting 20 people to a show. It was a scene that encouraged tone-deaf people like me to learn how to play bass guitar, write a zine and actually participate in something other than watching television. These bands changed my life, and they offer a shot of that same inspiration on Sept. 5 at the Phoenix Theater for a onenight reunion. It's not as if all of these people just faded away--some moved on, but many stayed. Ben Saari of Mickey and the Bigmouths is one of the founders of the Free Mind Media Center. Darwin Meiners of Caffeine still plays music, directed the film Fairfield, Idaho, and puts on the "Look Ma, No Band!" shows. And Kevin McCracken of Twine is the Chief Operating Officer of Social Imprints, a forwardthinking screenprinting company that makes shirts for Metallica and Grizzly Bear. There isn't enough space to chronicle all of the bands spawned by these folks: the Crux, Santiago, Edaline, Secret Courtesy, Holy Rolemodel, Aim Low Kid, the Drone, Semi-Evolved Simians, Desert City Soundtrack, the Listening Group, the Aphrodisiacs, Luv n' Rockets, and How to Lie are just a few. With punk, hardcore, ska, and what people would later deny was "emo," this bill covers a lot of ground in a half-day festival of feedback and barbecue. Bring some extra bucks for the merch table, come back home to the Phoenix, and pay homage to Sonoma County's roots! Nostalgia Fest features reunions by Kid Dynamo (above), Ground Round, Blindspot, Caffeine, the Invalids, Schoolbox, Mickey & the Bigmouths, Twine and the Catnips on Saturday, Sept. 5, at the Phoenix Theater. 201 E. Washington St., Petaluma. $10. 5pm. Yes, it is true: 21 and over only. 707.762.3565. Kevin Jamieson S 42 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN How Eric Lindell makes it in the business O Clubs ld-timers will complain and complain about how young bands have it easy these days, swallowing the baited clich� of the overnight hit single, the fashionable haircut and the glossy magazine cover. The reality of the situation is far more grim, exacerbated by the level playing field of the internet. In order to get noticed amid the constant barrage of MySpace pages and blog reviews, musicians have to take matters behind their own steering wheel and follow a constant regimen of touring and playing live as much as possible. After 16 years, as long as you're talented, good-looking, have a reliable band and haven't yet burnt out, overdosed, lost your creative impetus in a messy divorce or found Jesus, you might get lucky enough to break even. Just ask Eric Lindell. After putting out Gulf Coast Highway, the best record of his long career, Lindell in 2009 is the living disputation of the idea that kids get rich overnight in the music business. He's been patiently clawing his way up since playing small bars in Santa Rosa, doing things the slow but right way. He's constantly on the road, tirelessly playing with anyone and for anyone along the way. And though he doesn't have that big hit or that glossy magazine cover, he's got something worth far more: respect. Those who haven't kept tabs on Lindell in the last few years are encouraged to pick up a copy of Gulf Coast Highway, or better yet, see him live on Friday, Sept. 4, at the Cloverdale Plaza (Downtown Cloverdale; 7pm; free; 707.894.4410) or Saturday, Sept. 5, at the Last Day Saloon (120 Fifth St., Santa Rosa; 8:30pm; $15�$18. 707.545.2343). Gabe Meline THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 43 the last day saloon nightclub & restaurant the best place for live music, dancing and dining THIS WEEK ELECTRIC FUNERAL THE HOOVERS, THE WOODSMEN AND THE ERIC MCFADDEN TRIO SAT ! SEPT 5 ! $20 ADV/$25 DOS FRI ! SEPT 4 SABBATH TRIBUTE THURS ! SEPT 3 9/3 9:30 PM SHOW > $10/12 > R&B HIP HOP AT ALL COSTS + SKEE-LO + RAPPIN' 4-TAY + MYRA 9/5 8:30 PM SHOW > $15/18 > BLUES ROCK ALLIGATOR RECORDING ARTIST ERIC LINDELL + PETER JOSEPH BURTT 9/6 1 PM SHOW > $10 > DIXIELAND JAZZ RICHIE SPICE & SPANNER BANNER NEXT WEEK THURS ! SEPT 10 MOUSTACHE HARBOR 70'S HITS FEAT JAMMERS DAY + SIX JAM SESSIONS BY T.R.A.D. J.A.S.S. MEMBERS OF TAINTED LOVE 9/10 9:00 PM SHOW > $12/15 > ROCK HEDGEHOG PRODUCTIONS PRESENTS AMERICAN DRAG & SPECIAL GUESTS SAT ! SEPT 12 ! $12ADV/$15 DOS FRI ! SEPT 11 ! $12 MELDRUM + SAINTS OF RUIN + FEAR THE FIASCO THE UNAUTHORIZED ROLLING STONES HOT UPCOMING ACTS 9/11 9:30 PM SHOW > $10 > 80'S DANCE ROCK NOTORIOUS 9/12 8:00 PM SHOW > $11/13 > COMEDY BEST OF THE BAY COMEDY WITH PRIDE & JOY ! ST CROIX REGGAE ARMY ! BATHRHYME THE MOTHER HIPS JOHNNY STEELE + LARRY BUBBLES BROWN + JEFF BLAZY 9/13 12:15 PM SHOW > $5/8 > ROCK GREAT BURRO STUDIOS PRESENTS ROCK-CITAL FEATURING LOCAL KIDS' BANDS 9/16 8:30 PM SHOW > $15/18 > SURF ROCK RIO NIDO ROADHOUSE BAND EVENTS Fri Sept 4 � 7-10pm SOUTHERN CULTURE ON THE SKIDS + LOS STRAIGHTJACKETS 9/17 8:30 PM SHOW > $7 > ROCK REGGAE POYNTLESS SISTARS Sat Sept 5 � $12 UNAUTHORIZED ROLLING STONES UPCOMING EVENTS Sat Sept 12 LOU DOG TRIO (SUBLIME COVER BAND) + PAT JORDAN BAND + AUDIO DUB THUGZ Sun Sept 13 � 6�9pm Across the bridge 9/18 9:00 PM SHOW > $15 > 80'S DANCE DGIIN All Music 6�10pm � All Shows $5 unless noted TAINTED LOVE 9/19 9:00 PM SHOW > $10/13 > ROCK HEDGEHOG PRODUCTIONS PRESENTS Swimming Pool Open to Public Lunch � Dinner � Brunch on Weekends Full Bar � Live Bands 707.869.0821 | 14540 Canyon 2, Rio Nido JETBOY + + darkside shine cage the rage www.rionidoroadhouse.com all shows are 21+ unless noted get reserved show seating with advance dinner reservations for reservations: 707.545.5876 Women's Health Specialists confidential compassionate nonjudgmental More Than Just Health Care... 707.545.2343 120 5th street @ davis street santa rosa, ca lastdaysaloon.com 44 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN 707.537.1171 www.cawhs.org Jay-Z feeds off Grizzly Bear for fresh inspiration in hip-hop. In which Jay-Z big-ups indie rock By Gabe Meline ure, Jay-Z and Beyonc� hardly ever show up in public together, and yet it wasn't the weirdest thing in the world that the royal couple showed up to Grizzly Bear's outdoor concert in Brooklyn over the weekend. Grizzly Bear, of course, is the buzz band of the year, and much like the Arcade Fire secured the older generation's nod of approval through collaborations with David Bowie and Bruce Springsteen, Grizzly Bear have appeared onstage and in the studio with Paul Simon, Michael McDonald and the Los Angeles Philharmonic. So Jay-Z and Beyonc�? It's not unusual. What was unusual was Jay-Z's explanation for being at the show, from an MTV interview earlier this week, and it is strangely and satisfyingly on point. "The thing I want to say to everyone--I hope this happens because it will push rap, it will push hip-hop to go even further--what the indie rock movement is doing right now is very inspiring," he told MTV on Monday. "It felt like us in the beginning. These concerts, they're not on the radio, no one hears about them, and there's 12,000 people in attendance. And the music that they're making and the connection they're making to people is really inspiring. So I hope that they have a run where they push hip-hop back a little bit, so it will force hip-hop to fight to make better music. Because it can happen. Because that's what rap did to rock." In the past few years, Jay-Z's been more a galvanizing figurehead of hip-hop than rapper of great artistic vitality, so his stance is important in several ways, and not just because he's drawing attention to a very good band. His undercurrent here is twofold: one, that operating independently outside of the mainstream music industry is the right way to do things; and two, that hip-hop kinda sucks these days. "Indie rock" is a funny phrase, especially since, like "alternative rock" before it, it signifies a style of music that has become widely accepted. But its etymology remains proper. Though there are exceptions in the form of Modest Mouse and the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, the most successful indie-rock bands right now--Grizzly Bear, Arcade Fire, Animal Collective, Vampire Weekend, Dirty Projectors--record for thriving independent labels and intentionally avoid venues under the corporate stranglehold of the despicable behemoth Live Nation. Jay-Z is under that stranglehold; he's in the same company as U2, Madonna and Nickelback by signing a "360 Deal" that gives Live Nation, a spinoff of Clear Channel, the rights to all of his recordings, live shows, merchandising and tours for the next decade. It's a $152 million contract, so Jay can't be completely ashamed of signing his career away, but it is nice to know that there's a small kernel of his brain that remembers his own independent label he founded long ago, Roc-a-Fella Records, and that sees a band like Grizzly Bear and says, "Yeah man, that's the way." As for the second subtext, that hiphop sucks these days, it's true to an extent, insofar as one is willing or able to dig. In other words, look underground. The most promising hip-hop debut this year is by a former automotive engineer from Detroit named Finale, who left the assembly line eight years ago to focus on rapping fulltime. A Pipe Dream and a Promise, released this year on Interdependent Media, is the sound of Detroit that Eminem could never hope to capture, a pastiche of the city's rich musical history, from Motown to house music to J. Dilla, with Finale's own tales from one of the most hard-hit, economically depressed cities in America. As a snapshot of Detroit, the album is vivid with abandoned neighborhoods, struggling families and old auto-industry friends out of work. As a snapshot of Finale's personal life, the album contains unflinching honesty like "Brother's Keeper," a moving account of his family laying blame on him when his brother landed in jail. And as a snapshot of who's who in production, the album boasts beats by Los Angeles electro whiz Flying Lotus, Motor City producer Black Milk and the late, elevated J. Dilla, who recognized and gave Finale a huge early push. Finale has already signed, regretted and wrangled out of various business contracts, so he knows what the industry can do to earnest young artists. So far, staying independent is paying off, probably much more so than any ill-fated major-label deal he could sign. Just like Grizzly Bear's done. And just like Jay-Z, somewhere deep down, beneath his $152 million deal with Live Nation, recognizes. DON'T FORGET...WE SERVE FOOD TOO! Mc Near's Dining House Breakfast � Lunch � Dinner BBQ � Pasta � Steak SAT 9/5 � 8:00PM DOORS � $22ADV/$25 DOS � 21+ REGGAE ISRAEL VIBRATION PLUS GIANT PANDA GUERILLA DUB SQUAD WED 9/16 � 7:30PM DOORS � $15ADV/$18 DOS � 21+ LIVE FROM HAWAII SASHAMON PLUS THE HOLDUP THUR 9/17 � 8:00PM DOORS � $25 � 18+ ROCK Taste the Best of Sonoma County CITIZEN COPE FRI 9/18 � 7:00PM DOORS � $35 � 21+ SOUTHERN ROCK All in One Place MARSHAL TUCKER BAND PLUS ALAMEDA ALLSTARS SAT 9/19 � 7:00PM DOORS � $27ADV/$30 DOS � 18+ SINGER/SONGWRITER JERRY JEFF WALKER SOLO PLUS DJANGO WALKER SUN 9/20 � 7:00PM DOORS � $45 � 21+ ROCK/JAM BAND H Harvest F t Fair Fa Awards Nig Night ight Gala G l September 26th September 26th 7 - 9 : 3 0 p. m 7-9:30 p.m.. Tickets On Sale Now! No N w! So. County Fairgrounds So. County Fairgrounds $65 per person $65 per person Purchase 10 or more Purchase 10 or more tickets at $55 each tickets at $55 each BLUES TRAVELER PLUS POINTS NORTH MON 9/21 � 7:00PM DOORS � $35 � 21+ BLUES THE ROBERT CRAY BAND SAT 9/26 � 7:00PM DOORS � $15 � 16+ POP/ROCK THE LOST BOYS PLUS 21 GRAMS SUN 9/27 � 7:00PM DOORS � $22 ADV/$25 DOS � 21+ R&B/FUNK THE AVERAGE WHITE BAND PLUS DJ HARRY D Includes All Tasting Includes All Tasting from 1000+ Wines from 1000+ Wines FRI 10/2 � 7:00PM DOORS � $25 � 21+ ROOTS/ROCK DAVE ALVIN AND THE GUILTY WOMEN PLUS More tasting... More tasting... ELIZA GILKYSON SAT 10/3 � 7:00PM DOORS � $25 � 21+ ROCK MONTROSE PLUS Harvest Fa Fair air Weekend k d October 2-4 October 2-4 www.harvestfair.org 707.545.4203 THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 LUV PLANET For All Ages Shows � No Children Under 6 Allowed 23 Petaluma Blvd, Petaluma 707-765-2121 www.mcnears.com 45 Nancy Shapiro is among the artists showcased in the SVMA's biennial. See Openings, adjacent. Dinner and a Show Reservations advised "A Historic West Marin Landmark" Fri Fri EST. 1941 Take a scenic drive for a unique dining experience 20 min from downtown Petaluma, 25 min from everywhere else! Ron Thompson Sept 4 Blues Wizard 8:00pm / In the Bar Rancho Debut! Sept 11 Buddy Owen Band Back to Basics Rock 8:00pm Sat Volker Strifler Band Sept 12 Red Hot Blues 8:30pm Fri Unauthorized Sept 18 Rolling Stones Now OPEN! Wednesday thru Friday 3pm - 9pm Saturday & Sunday 1pm - 7pm Fri 8:30pm Sept 25 The Ed Earley Band 8:00pm / Party In the Bar Galleries 2009 BBQ's On the Lawn! Sun LABOR DAY WEEKEND Music 4pm $25 Gates Open 3pm Sept 6 Roy Rogers and the Delta Rhythm Kings Sun Sun Sun Plus Jeffrey Halford $20 Sept 7 Marcia Ball Enjoy His Beverage Under His Lights! 46 09.02.09-09.08.09 Buckwheat Zydeco Sept 13 $20 / Gates Open 3pm, Music 4pm Sept 20 Family Day~Last BBQ of 2009! Jumpy Jump & Horseshoes The 85's & Petty Theft $12/ Kids under 10/ $5 Gates Open 2pm, Music 3pm Outdoor Dining 7 Days a Week 415.662.2219 Square, Nicasio On the Town www.ranchonicasio.com THE BOHEMIAN Custom hot rods on display at the `Wrong Side of the Tracks' f you're in a framing shop in the next few weeks and you see Travis Kennedy picking out a choice frame, feel free to walk up and shake his hand. The muscular, tattooed owner of Daredevils & Queens hair salon in Railroad Square and founding member of the Dirty Jerks Car Club was recently clocked driving 95mph in Wendover, Utah, and he was issued a speeding ticket he's more than proud to hang on his wall. Why? Because Kennedy was going 95mph . . . in a 1931 Model A. This Saturday, the Dirty Jerks Car Club hosts "Wrong Side of the Tracks," a car show in Santa Rosa's Railroad Square designed to promote the idea that vintage cars are meant to be driven. "It's a car, not a trophy," Kennedy insists, who along with driving his '31 Model A to Bonneville and back also drives a 1952 Chevy to work every day. "Wrong Side of the Tracks" focuses on pre1965 traditional hot rods, custom cars and low riders with an emphasis on owner maintenance, "instead of some rich guy who can afford to pay some shop to build his car for him, who puts it in his trailer to take it to Hot August Nights once a year, and then it just sits in his garage." Don't expect a Harrah's showroom atmosphere at "Wrong Side of the Tracks." The flyer advises "No Billet-- No Trailer Queens--No Bullshit." Chances are, there'll be guys covered in axle grease poking under each other's dented hoods talking about carburetors alongside older people reliving bygone memories (a 70-year-old woman once saw Kennedy's car and confided to him that she was once "compromised" in a '52 Chevy). Loud, fast and out-of-control bands in the form of Ashtray, Moonshine, Snipers and more will keep the festivities hopping, and the next day, participants are invited to join in the "Lucky Bastards Reliability Run"--the lucky bastards being the ones whose 60-year-old cars don't break down while driving around. Reliable or not, old cars will always have a way with turning heads. "You can go spend $80,000 on some badass new truck, lifted and everything," Kennedy says, "but I can drive by one of those trucks, and I guarantee you that girl that's sitting passenger in that big ol' expensive truck is gonna be looking down at my car, going, `That's a cool car.'" "Wrong Side of the Tracks" features pre-1965 custom cars and the music of Ashtray, Moonshine, Snipers and more on Saturday, Sept. 5, at Depot Park. Railroad Square, Santa Rosa. 10am�7:30pm. Free for spectators; $10 entry for car owners, no pre-registration. 707.577.8674. Gabe Meline I Comedy Events F&D THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 47 Film Readings Sausalito Art Fest films our own little slice of Woodstock Field Trips P Lectures Theater erhaps the finest commercial art fair on the West Coast, the Sausalito Art Festival is also widely known for its great food, spectacular bayside setting and the yowza music lineup. Musical artists who normally hold sway in large amphitheatres seem to like the intimacy and immediacy of the tent at Sausalito, and many renowned older acts that might fill the Shoreline are often on the roster. This year is no exception, except that the amphitheater they most famously filled was on a small muddy farm in upstate New York--and if you've read any media lately, you know how this sentence ends: at Woodstock. Country Joe McDonald hosts the "Heroes of Woodstock" tour arriving at Sausalito for the final day of the fest on Sept. 7. In attendance will be pianist Tom Constanten of the Grateful Dead, the Quicksilver Messenger Service, Big Brother and the Holding Company, Canned Heat, Jefferson Starship and plenty of movie cameras. The bands are also essentially adhering to the set lists they performed at the original concert. The Starship will actually play the Airplane; Big Brother will stick to Janis. The concert, as was the Aug. 15 tribute concert at the Bethel center in Woodstock, is being filmed in highdefinition 2-D and 3-D for a DVD release slated for October. Not only will it feature the acts, if you attend Sausalito, there's every chance it will also feature you. What has us stumped is the 3-D aspect. Not to be ageist, but the original dudes from Big Brother, the Starship, et al., are of an age when unfortunate hairs sprout from eyebrows, ears and noses. Do we really want that kind of natural phenomenon springing, all lifelike, into our faces? "Nobody's zooming in that close to anyone," assures Golden Leaf Pictures vice president of creative development Ed Olson. "What 3-D does more than anything is that it gives you a clarity more true to the real concert experience. Given the immersive quality of the imagery, there's this really great feeling of depth." With a steady cam, overhead booms and a camera onstage, the spectacle of filmmaking will be as much a part of the afternoon as the music itself. Olson says that there will be signs alerting the crowd to the possibility that they'll be captured, before giving a short laugh. "You should move to the back," he warns, "if you're with someone you shouldn't be with." The Sausalito Art Festival runs Saturday�Monday, Sept. 5�7, from 9am with a preview gala slated for Friday, Sept. 4, at 6pm. Saturday is '80s madness with the English Beat, Tainted Love and Night Ranger. Sunday is blue with the Fabulous Thunderbirds and Johnny Winter. Every day features high-level commercial fine art. Marinship Park at the Bay Model, 2100 Bridgeway, Sausalito. $5�$20; under 6, free. Three-day pass, $30; gala, $125. 415.331.4757. Gretchen Giles 48 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN BOHEMIANROMANCE check us out online at: www.NorthBayRomance.com To become a member, call To listen & respond to ads using your credit card, call To listen & respond to ads, call 1 800.214.3435 For customer service, email bohemian@ placepersonal.com, or call 1-617-450-8773 Women Seeking Men ATTRACTIVE, FUN ARTIST Seeking friend, late 60s-80s to do things with, like movies, concerts, opera, dinner, whatever. I am a good cook and I have a productive garden, vegetables, fruit trees etc. No smoking, maybe light drinks. 299194 LET'S GO OUT & HAVE FUN! Honest woman, 50s, very caring, compassionate, kind, my interests are long drives, walks, dancing, visiting new places, dinners. Seeking nice SM, 50s-60s, for LTR. 297169 YOU FOUND ME! SF, 40ish, bright, hard-working, kind, enjoys reading, long drives, coffee shops, traveling. ISO nice gentleman, 30-49, for dating and maybe more. 297165 1 800.273.8235 TERRIFIC INSIDE AND OUT Goal-oriented single female, 50s, health-minded, intelligent, enjoys camping, outdoor fun, exercise, eating out. desires to meet a wonderful guy, 50-59, for LTR. 297223 1 900.287.1222 Call costs $2.29/min. Must be 18+ FRIENDS OR MORE Nurturing, artistic, bright, hard-working, compassionate, feminine female in her 50s, enjoys music, dancing, travel, the beach, kayaking, dining, taking walks. Seeking male, 50-69, for friendship with the possibility of more. 309768 WAITING ARMS Caring, educated, honest, optimistic, hard-working SF, 30s, enjoys travel, dining out, long drives, the beach, reading, walks, hiking, music and more. Would like to meet like-minded man, 30-40, for LTR. 313123 � � � ADVENTUROUS WOMAN Attractive, creative, and energetic lady looking for warm-hearted, compatible seeker, 65-70, with good SOH, for dating, possible relationship. 300201 � � OUTDOORSY Bright,compassionate, honest, friendly, adaptable woman, 50s, seeks SM, 40-60, who enjoys dining, dancing, beaches, taking walks, for casual dating or LTR. 301192 MUST BE SINCERE SF, 59, 5'2'', 115lbs, redhead, Christian, likes dining, good conversation. Seeking SM, 45-60, who is very romantic and ready for a relationship. 297397 EDUCATED WOMAN SWF, in her 40s, N/S, seeks gentleman, 40-50, for friendship and LTR. Let's meet and talk! 300135 TAKE A CHANCE ON ME Ambitious woman, 40s, very caring and pleasant personality, likes music, camping, biking, outdoor activities, reading. Seeking similar gentleman, 40s, for friendship and more. 297166 � CARING AND COMPASSIONATE Friendly, adaptable, outdoorsy, caring, healthy SF, 40s, likes dancing, travel, dining, hiking, the beach. Seeking SM, 30-50, for casual dating possibly leading to LTR. 299368 � Men Seeking Women CALL ME! SM, 40, looking for SF, over 55, for friendship and companionship first. Let's talk and get to know each other! 292779 � � � � SHE'S A LADY Attractive SWF, 69, seeks gentleman, 65-75, for friendship and companionship. Let's talk and see what develops! 305310 LOCAL GAL WF looking for someone fun, nice, loyal, honest and intelligent who likes good conversation, wine tasting, art, barbecues, camping, hanging out at home and more. 40-55. 306414 GOOD VALUES Caring, personable, compassionate, classy, hard-working female, 50s, likes music, dancing, travel, reading, museums, dining, the beach. Seeking SM, 50s, for friendship, possibly more. 309780 I'M THE ONE FOR YOU! Goal-oriented woman, 40s, enjoys exercise, outdoors, traveling, shopping. ISO similar gentleman, 30-49, for dating, friendship and more. 297184 � OPTIMISTIC Friendly, ambitious, adaptable, outdoorsy, personable female, 50s, enjoys museums, dining, travel, coffee shops, the beach, taking walks. Seeking SM, 60s, for friendship and casual dating. 299370 HONESTY A MUST Hard-working, honest, optimistic, nurturing, flexible, motivated SF, 50s, likes biking, the beach, travel, dancing, hiking, reading, music, seeks similar man, 50s, who is ready for LTR. 301198 � � � � � IT'S TIME Spiritual SWF, young 70s, petite, professional, employed, kids grown, ISO a fine, grounded gentleman, 65-70, for possible LTR. 240656 TRADITIONAL VALUES SAF, 60, petite, very healthy, very active, secured, honest, sincere, hardworking, likes gardening, cooking, reading, home stuff, occasional drives to the countryside. Seeking SWM, 6075, who's clean-cut, N/S, N/D, with similar qualities, for friendship first, possible LTR. 313785 � CATCH ME IF YOU CAN! Very kind, feminine lady, 50s, healthy, hard-working, likes dining out, traveling, exercise. Seeking nice gentleman, in his 50s, to share friendship and LTR. 297187 � CAPTIVATING Sophisticated, outdoorsy, friendly, mischievous SF, 50s, likes hiking, kayaking, taking walks. In search of SM, 50-70, for LTR. 301203 ONE HONEST WOMAN LEFT Bright SF, 60s, with good values, flexible and honest, likes reading, camping, travel, taking walks. Seeking similar male, 50-69, for friendship, casual relationship, possible LTR. 309769 � � � CHANCES ARE SF, 50s, RN, healthy, good values, hard-working, likes outdoors, traveling, reading, dining out, biking. Seeking honest gentleman, 55-75, for friendship and more. 297193 WOMAN WITH GOOD VALUES Friendly, caring, honest, compassionate, classy lady, 20s, wants to meet a man in his 20s for camping, shopping, travel, dining, long drives and walks, and more! Friendship possibly leading to more. 299374 � � LET'S MEET FOR DINNER Caring, honest, flexible, compassionate woman, 60s, loves dancing, travel, reading, dining out. Seeking similar man, 60s, for LTR. 301189 � GOOD VALUES Shy, friendly, caring, compassionate SF, 60s, nurturing, motivated, enjoys walks, the beach, coffee shops, biking, dining, seeks similar man, 60+, for friendship leading to LTR. 301544 VERY PERSONABLE Motivated, bright, artistic, hardworking, health-conscious female, 50s, personable and flexible, seeks male, age open, who likes museums, travel, long drives, camping, hiking. 309770 TAKE A CHANCE ON ME Motivated, outdoorsy, honest, healthconscious woman, with good values and optimistic attitude, likes most kinds of music, dining out, walks, camping, travel and relaxing time at home. Seeking a nice, honest, active man, 30-40, with similar interests, to spend time with, possible leading to LTR. 313124 � � � HANDSOME BM... 65, seeks female for fun-loving adventures and relaxation. I love cooking, surprises, and giving gifts. 302811 LONG HAIR A PLUS Good-looking Native American male, 5'8", 220lbs, long hair, in search of a Hispanic or Native American woman, 50s, for friendship first and companionship. 304173 � LOOKING FOR LTR Outdoorsy, health-minded, clean-cut, honest woman in her 30s, who enjoys biking, dining, shopping, the beach, hiking, taking walks, wants to meet a male in his 30s for LTR. 309772 � LADY PLAYS THE BLUES Slender, feminine, pretty and youthful SWF, 50+, enjoys music, dining out, travel, nature. Would like to meet a genuinely nice, good-looking SM, 45+, N/S, with sense of humor, who is socially and financially secure, for dating, fun, friendship and more. 303711 PETITE BLONDE Educated and attractive, down-toearth WF would like to meet someone who shares some of my interests like metal music, concerts, learning and more. If you have an open mind, I definitely want to hear from your. 3550. 314433 � SEARCH NO FURTHER Sweet single lady, 50s, feminine, sophisticated, optimistic, hard-working, enjoys shopping, tv programs, movies, traveling, reading, quiet nights at home. ISO similar man, 50-59, for serious LTR. 297196 � � � LOOKING FOR LTR Friendly, feminine, nurturing, captivating, bright, personable woman in her 50s who enjoys night clubs, television, dining, dancing, surfing, music, seeks similar male, 40-60, for LTR. 301191 PERSONABLE Compassionate, bright, friendly female, 40s, likes music, dancing, dining, biking, coffee shops. Seeking similar male, 50s, for LTR. 302304 � � CAPTIVATING! Adorable, hard-working, classy female, 50s, enjoys museums, shopping, travel, coffee shops, the beach. Seeking SM, 50s, for friendship, casual relationship, or LTR. 309776 MANY FINE QUALITIES Caring, outdoorsy, honest, artistic, hard-working SF, early 50s, optimistic homebody with good values, has many interests including music, dining out, museums, travel, long drives, reading, walks, camping, biking and more. Looking for an honest, downto-earth SM, 50-70, for friendship and dating first, possibly leading to something more serious. 313126 � � SEEKING AN OPEN MIND SBM, 33, 250lbs, smoker, enjoys cars, long walks, working out. Looking for SF, 20-65, kids ok, for possible relationship. 304990 � � SHY AND ARTISTIC Single female in her 50s looking for a male who enjoys music, television. Let's meet and see if we connect! 308997 � � A CARING HEART Outdoorsy, flexible, nurturing, feminine woman, 50s, likes camping, long drives, travel, coffee shops, taking walks. Seeking male, 40-59, for LTR. 309777 ADORABLE AND BRIGHT Caring, friendly, goal-oriented, feminine, honest, compassionate woman, 60s, likes travel, exercise, music, hiking, long drives, dining out, the beach, reading and more. Seeking a great companion, 50-70, to share these activities and quiet times with. 313128 PACIFIC NORTHWEST Casual guy, enjoys mountain and beach trips, walks, outdoors, moonlit nights, cuddling. Seeking SWF, 40-56, slim/medium build, to come spend quiet times in Pacific Northwest. 954499 � � � 1949 CLASSIC SWF, tall, slender, active, enjoys swimming, bicycling, mysteries, hiking, cooking, barbecuing, symphony. Seeking well-mannered, caring S/ DWM, 50-60, N/S, N/D, N/Drugs, with similar interests, for friendship and companionship. 415313 LET'S MEET FOR DINNER SWF, 49, 5'4'', H/W proportionate, blondish-brown layered hair, big blue eyes, down-to-earth, mellow, nice, kind, sweet, considerate, laid-back, seeks SM, 35-55, who has a good sense of humor. I enjoy cats, beaches, hiking, camping, movies. 310278 Singles Parties ADULTS OF ALL AGES WELCOME! COMPASSIONATE Friendly, honest, artistic, outdoorsy, caring SF, 30s, likes watching tv, dancing, the beach, travel, walks, music, hiking, museums, dining out, more. Searching for a partner in life, 30-50, for possible LTR. 313131 SHARED JOY SWM, 59, 5'9", 160lbs, nice-looking, with good SOH, seeking woman to have fun with, race/age unimportant. I like dancing, partying, shows and dining out. Call me! 972627 � � � � YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE Hard-working woman, 30ish, motivated, bright, caring, enjoys the beach, exercise, walks, outdoor fun, reading. Seeking caring man, 30s, for serious LTR. 297170 LET'S MEET AND TALK SWF, 39, 5'3'', loves music, dancing. Looking for a social SWM, mid 40s, for friendship first. 318133 OUTGOING AND FUN Compassionate, caring, friendly, honest SF, 20s, likes going to clubs, camping, hiking, reading, the beach, dining out, more. Looking for a downto-earth, easygoing man, 22-35, for LTR. 313136 � ONE GOOD MAN LEFT SHM, 32, N/S, likes soccer, running. In search of SA/BF for friendship first possibly leading to more. 319059 � � SOMEONE LIKE ME SWM, youthful 51, 5'11'', 200lbs, dark hair, hazel eyes, looking for a lady, 40-59, who likes to party, is outgoing, adventurous. 319319 � � LOOKING FOR A FRIEND SAF, 48, 5'4'', looking for a friend who will eventually become my partner in life. 318943 LET'S TALK! SF, 50ish, caring, honest, creative, good values, likes music, dancing, walks, the beach, dining out. Seeking nice gentleman, 56-64, for possible LTR. 297154 � LIKE GOING OUT? Honest, goal-oriented personable, artistic, sophisticated, hardworking SF would like to meet a SM, 40-60, who enjoys travel, walks, the beach, music, reading, camping, long drives, museums, tv, dining out, dancing and more. Seeking LTR. 313138 � A BIG HEART Caring, loving SF, 39, enjoys movies, the outdoors, travel. Looking for SW/ HM, 39-50, for friendship, maybe more. 305007 � SWEEP ME OFF MY FEET! SF, 50ish, sincere, kind personality, adaptable, likes music, hiking, outdoors, dancing. Seeking nice gentleman, for friendship first and maybe more. 297158 � EASY ON THE EYES Outgoing, good-looking WM, 6', 175lbs, salt-n-pepper/blue, good sense of humor, spontaneous, romantic, adventurous, likes weekend getaways, concerts and more. Seeking honest, appreciative woman, 22-65, who has goals in life. 320839 � � SOLO IN SANTA ROSA Still looking for lips of wine. SWF, 60, likes working out, open mic night, social life, some sports. Looking for a male friend. 152766 � HEY THERE! Caring woman, 50s, bright, artistic, classy, enjoys music, shopping, traveling, television. ISO nice, similar guy for casual dating, possible LTR. 297160 Vine Tasting Party � Sunday, September 6 Vine Tastings on Old Downtown Windsor Green 9058 Windsor Rd. Mill Valley Mixer Thursday, September 17 7-9pm, Fratoio Ristorante 52 Shoreline Hwy, Mill Valley Napa Valley Mixer Tuesday, September 22 7-9pm, Silo's Jazz Club 530 Main Street, Napa � SEEKING LTR Honest, compassionate, artistic, friendly, goal-oriented, caring SF, 50s, health-minded with good values, into music, the beach, dancing, tv, travel, museums, walks, reading and more. Would like to meet SM, around the same age, for companionship. 313139 LTR AND LOVE IN BOOTS Italian Taurus, SM, 45, 6', 218lbs, N/S, N/Drugs, N/D, long hair, educated, published, financially/emotionally secure, respectful, inspiring, tender, great sense of humor, enjoys alternative music, dancing, movies, animals, cooking, conversation, mountains. Seeking thin, dancing SWF, 18-33, in boots for LTR. 315052 � NEW TO THE AREA Beautiful SWF, 40, full-figured, would like to meet an intelligent, cosmopolitan gentleman, 50-75, for fun, romance and travel. 286108 � HELLO THERE! Feminine woman, healthy, compassionate, artistic, likes dancing, walks, reading, traveling. Seeking similar man, 50-69, for LTR. 297161 � CO-SPONSORED by Bohemian Romance and Society of Single Professionals INFO at www. ThePartyHotline.com or 415-507-9962 LIKE PBS? Personable, caring, goal-oriented friendly, artistic, compassionate woman, with good values, likes coffee shops, music, reading, walks, travel, dancing, dining out and more. Looking for honest, respectful man, 50-70, for LTR. 313143 � � HOPE TO FIND YOU Sociable, good-hearted, compassionate, healthy gentleman, 63, published writer/poet, D/D-free, non-drinker, enjoys quiet times, home, sports, simple times. Seeking loving, happy, intelligent woman to share life, love, possible LTR. Bay Area preferred. 224839 ABBREVIATIONS: A-Asian; B-Black; C-Christian; F-Female; G-Gay; H-Hispanic; J-Jewish; M-Male; N/S-Non-Smoker; P-Professional; S-Single; W-White Guidelines: Bohemian Romance is a community publication. Participants in the Bohemian Romance must be 18 years or older. Use of Bohemian Romance for any illegal purpose will be subject to prosecution. Bohemian Romance is not liable for the content of the personals advertisements or the response to such advertisements. Bohemian Romance encourages readers to take appropriate safeguards when responding to personal and arranging meetings. Screen all respondents carefully. Meetings with new companions should occur in public places and participants should not divulge their addresses. Be smart, not sorry. Not all boxes contain a voice greeting. Dial 1.900.287.1222 or 1.800.273.8235 (with credit card or check) Only $2.29 per minute � 18 and up � Or call toll-free 1.800.214.3435 to become a member. 0828 THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 49 g g g g Adult Entertainment Adult t Entertainment SANTA ROSA'S SINGLES! Quality and Maturity Kara, in Marin. Call for photos. Please, no calls from blocked phone numbers. No calls after midnight. 415/233-2769. Adult Massage **Custom Massage** Convenient incall off 101.See pix at Lovings.com Liza and Kayla. 707-526-6766. Chatline WHERE SINGLES MEET Listen & Respond FREE! 707/583-1055 Code 6999 Visit MegaMates.com, 18+ Dateline 707 206 6494 707-206-6494 SAN FRANCISCO....415-501-9701 T SANTA CALL NOW! SANTA ROSA MEN SEEKING MEN Browse & Respond FREE! 415-430-1199 Code 5631 Meet Your Man Here! Call 707.527.1200 with your adult ad and let us do the rest! Ariel of E XCEPTIONAL P LEASURES 707-732-6862 Collect Call Billing! 1-866-607-5282 1-900 Pricing Options! 1-900-622-1100 Dial #CLICK (#25425) 79�/min. Sprint, Boost, AT&T 18+ *Charges may apply to certain features. credit cards accepted/available 24/7 50 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN BOHEMIANROMANCE To become a member, call To listen & respond to ads, call 1 800.214.3435 1 800.273.8235 1 900.287.1222 Call costs $2.19/min. Must be 18+ Men Seeking Women LOOK NO FURTHER SWM, 30, 5'4'', looking for a woman, 30-40, who wants to hang out and get to know each other. 317907 FUN, INTROSPECTIVE SWM, 52, 6'4'', in good shape, likes classic movies, reading, hiking, classical music, sailing, the outdoors, travel, the symphony. Looking for SF, 22-50, similar interests. 301801 To listen & respond to ads using a credit card or check, call For customer service, email bohemian@ placepersonal.com, or call 1-617-450-8773 � � COOKING FOR YOU! SWM, 62, 5'10", 170lbs, N/S, light drinker, clean shaven, hazel eyes, self-employed, loves cooking, jazz and traveling. Seeking a similar woman, 50-80, race unimportant, for possible LTR. 318883 STARTING OVER Separated WM, loves hockey, the outdoors, golf, staying in and watching movies, gardening and more. Would like to meet someone fun who wants to enjoy life. Call me and lift my spirits. 282029 THOUGHTFUL, ROMANTIC Warm, sweet, affectionate, handicapped guy, loves humor, cuddling. Sweet-hearted, genuinely nice guy with fun attitude, easy-going, creative, silly, great sense of humor, very goofy at times, animal-lover, loves movies, music, museums and travel. Seeking female to share all my interests with. 315225 COMPASSIONATE GUY Hard-working, classy, clean-cut, caring, honest male in search of a male, 58-69, who likes night clubs, television, travel, dancing, the beach, taking walks, exercise. 308996 LET'S TALK! SWM, mid 30s, looking for discreet guys in the Larkfield area for friendship and fun. Call me! 300359 � � � CALL ME BiWM, handyman artist in Marin, 52, 5'6", 180lbs, dirty blond hair, pale blue eyes, seeks couple or singles for fun in Marin or nearby. 293610 � � JUST MOVED HERE SWM, 5'7'', 190lbs, brown eyes, wants to meet soulmate in similar SF, 30-55. I love swing dancing, travel, gourmet cooking, animals, nature. 305800 GOOD SENSE OF HUMOR SWM, 59, 5'11'', 180lbs, non-smoker, blue eyes, sandy brown hair, enjoys fishing, beaches, dining out and more. Seeking female, 55-65, for possible relationship. 309857 LET'S MEET FOR COFFEE SM, 20s, bright, artistic, ambitious, optimistic, personable, likes dining, travel, the beach, walking, exercise. Seeking female, 20s, for possible relationship. 318319 Women Seeking Women GOOD HEART SEEKS SAME GWPF, young 53, tall, slim build, attractive, great SOH, femme/tom boyish, loves music, animals, outdoors, cooking and laughter. Seeking GPF, 45-65, for dating and more. 296665 � JOIN US White couple looking for a female, 18-25, for fun, discreet times together. Give us a call. 311573 � � � � HOLLYWOOD STAR! Handsome dude, 57, good SOH, interesting, spontaneous, fun, adventuresome, looking for attractive woman. I enjoy dancing, concerts, dining out, hiking, beach combing and holding hands also loves animals, dogs, cats and horses. Happy trails! 201639 FRIEND LOVER SOULMATE SWPJM, 56, 5'10", blue eyes, sandy brown hair, kind, passionate, artistic, sincere, committed and fun, enjoys ocean walks, travel, arts, food, wine and nature. Seeking SF, 50-62, kindred spirit, kind, soft, sensuous, for life's adventures together. 309779 COMPASSIONATE SM, 60s, with good values, likes camping, dancing, dining, reading, hiking, walking, biking. Looking for SF, 50s, for LTR. 318320 � � � READY FOR FUN? SWM, 30, feminine bottom, looking for a top WM, 20-60, for good times and fun. Let's see where it goes! 311892 LOOKING FOR LTR SM, 31, outdoorsy, honest, compassionate, seeks SF, 22-35, who enjoys travel, television, camping, taking walks, the beach and more. 301200 SHARE MY WORLD Slender, athletic SF, 67, 5'6'', registered nurse with a Master's in Theology, loves hiking, swimming, museums, movies, cooking. Looking for SF, 55-68, for possible relationship. 301780 SPANK YOU VERY MUCH Woman, thou shalt be spanked. Gentle or hard, clothed or naked, whatever you deserve, by a sexy man who knows how to do it. 288495 � � � � � � SPECIAL WOMAN SM, 48, black hair, brown eyes, very outgoing, great personality, likes photography, basketball, music, travel. I'm looking for a woman who's interested in dating and possibly more. 287933 GET TO KOW ME SBM, 53, 6'1", 190lbs, looking for a fun, loving woman, 25-65, with a good personality, who likes having a good time, the beach, horseback riding, movies, walks and more. 314332 SOPHISTICATED Caring, compassionate, hard-working, goal-oriented, artistic SM, 40s, likes camping, dancing, travel. Searching for similar male, 30s, for LTR. 301536 � WHERE ARE YOU? You are 35-45, very feminine, dark, mystical, spiritual, with a sense of humor, know what you like, and want to enjoy life, but not alone. I'm trying to find you, where are you? 310085 SHE-MALE SEEKS GOOD TIMES Want to spend time with a man or a woman. I am very affectionate, beautiful, and love to be held. Interested? 279657 � � � PERSONABLE Shy SM, 50s, with good values, likes long drives, hiking, walking, travel, dining out. Looking for similar female, 40-60, ready for LTR. 301538 LET'S SHARE IDEAS Caring gentleman, 60s, intelligent, good morals, clean-cut, likes outdoors, traveling, hiking, reading, ISO nice woman, 50-60, for friendship leading to LTR. 297183 LOOKING FOR A SF WHO... is independent, confident and takes care of herself. I like good movies, dressing up for a nice dinner out, skiing, bike rides, hiking, scuba diving, swing dancing, cooking. I'm an honest person who doesn't believe in playing games. 301540 LOOKING FOR YOU SWF, 41, Santa Rosa area, looking for a SWF, 30-45, to hang out and have fun with. 318644 KEEP IT DISCREET WF, 30s, dark/dark, light complexion, fun-loving, bi-curious, seeks discreet female, 28-55, to have fun and party with. 314779 � � � � � LOVES HORSES Healthy senior WM, 165lbs, N/S, loves animals, especially horses, theater, PBS. Seeking slender female for romance. 302170 � THIS ONE'S FOR YOU Single male, in my 40s, honest, goaloriented, caring, outdoorsy, enjoys outdoor walks, long drives, art museums, traveling. ISO similar single female, 18-49, for dating leading to LTR. 297225 READY FOR LTR Shy, friendly, caring, clean-cut, classy SM, 50s, enjoys music, camping, travel, long drives, hiking, beaches, seeks similar woman, 30-50, for LTR. 302300 NATURE LOVER Health-conscious, honest, wise, spiritual, artistic, friendly female, 50s, enjoys philosophy, psychology, walking, reading, the beach. Searching for similar female, 50s, for long-term relationship. 302296 WHATEVER YOU DECIDE! SM, 5'11'', 170lbs, light brown hair, blue eyes, athletic build, shaved, smooth and sexy, well-endowed, into a wide variety of pleasures. Anything goes; role play, fantasy fulfillment, toys, porn, lingerie. Seeking couples and females to party and play. 316161 � 18+ 866.689.5312 Get ready to meet someone special. � � � ARE YOU THE ONE? Bright, artistic, caring, flexible, adorable guy, 50s, likes music, dancing, travel, the beach, dining out. Looking for similar female. 302306 � LET'S HAVE FUN! SHM, 34, N/S, no children, looking for a SH/WF, 24-32, for dating, possibly more. 302392 � LTR AND LOVE IN BOOTS Italian Taurus, SM, 45, 6', 218lbs, N/S, N/Drugs, N/D, long hair, educated, published, financially/emotionally secure, respectful, inspiring, tender, great sense of humor, enjoys alternative music, dancing, movies, animals, cooking, conversation, mountains. Seeking thin, dancing SWF, 18-33, in boots for LTR. 315055 LOOKING FOR LTR Hard-working, healthy, personable, honest, compassionate man, 40s, likes camping, travel, hiking, long drives, beaches. In search of similar female, 30s, for friendship leading to LTR. 302302 Alternative Lifestyles HOT COUPLES DESIRED Handsome, easygoing, discreet, polite gentleman, 57, enjoys couples. I am a WM, 6', 190lbs, athletic build, well hung and Bi. I also like dominant women. 232423 � � COUPLE SEEKS WOMAN Very attractive, middle-aged, married white couple, she's 5'2", 125lbs, 34D. He is 5'11", 172lbs. Both and very sensual and she is multi-orgasmic. We are N/S, light drinkers, heal-conscious, pleasant, non-pushy. Please be N/S, H/W proportionate, white, Hispanic or Asian, under 55. Bi or bi-curious ok. Discretion assured. Let's have fun. 314002 � SOMETIMES MISCHIEVOUS Optimistic, honest, clean-cut, caring, outdoorsy man, 50s, likes music, walks, long drives, running, watching tv, museums, dining out. Seeking SF, 50s, for companionship. 313135 � � FRIENDSHIP FIRST Caring, honest, nurturing SM, 60s, enjoys music, watching tv, walks, camping, coffee shops, hiking and museums. Looking for SF, 30-70, for dating possibly leading to LTR. 313144 STRAIGHTFORWARD FUN SWM, 39, looking for SF, 18-50, who likes to try new things and isn't afraid of having a little fun! 304707 TURN THE TABLES Handsome, sane, married WM, 57 is looking for a woman, who knows how to use a strap on, for ongoing, mostly daytime play. I will please you in any way that you want and I take directions well. 318288 � � � GREAT LEGS! Tall, slender cross-dresser, very nice legs, looking for men or a group of men. Give me a call, let's have some fun! 318996 SEEKING COUPLES Good-looking bi male, 50, would like to meet bi man/woman couples for erotic interlude. 319986 � � Men Seeking Men LOOKING FOR LOVE Seeking one man to love and care for completely and forever. Me: SBM, 50ish, affectionate, supportive, genuine, lots to offer. You: just be yourself, imperfect, mature older man, 70-90, with some humor, some laughter. Are you the one? 299175 BD/SM SWM, submissive, wants one or two females or young male for BD/SM, watersports, torture, anal. Never did any of this before, but curious to try now! 319455 Missed Connections JULIE IN SAFEWAY Sebastopol 7PM, you had a flower in your hair. We talked about basil and gardens. Meet for coffee or tea? 297217 � � STRAIGHT/BI GUY Frustrated with different need patterns at home? Understanding older gentleman, experienced, highly discreet, will provide time-tested stress relief for men, 30-50, in good shape; HWP, extremely private setting; no reciprocation expected. Curious? 136702 � � CORINA IN OLIVER'S Saturday at 4:00PM, You had 15-yearold twins with blacks belts in karate. I have two cute little kids. We talked about children and kale. Lunch? 311695 � call 1.800.214.3435 0828 The Bohemian is no longer servicing walk-in ads. Please call 1-800-214-3435 to become a member. Dial 1.900.287.1222 or 1.800.273.8235 (with credit card or check) Only $2.19 per minute � 18 and up � Or call toll-free 1.800.214.3435 to become a member. THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 51 Classified Index Employment For Sale Computer Market BOHEMIANCLASSIFIEDS Placing an Ad Contacting Us Bohemian Classifieds 847 5th Street Santa Rosa, CA 95404 Monday through Friday, 8:30a.m. to 5:30p.m. Professional Services Real Estate Services Home Services Home Services � By Phone Call the Department at 707.527.1200 Mon.-Fri., 8:30a.m.5:30p.m. By Fax Fax your ad to the Classified Department at 707.527.1288 In Person Visit our office Monday through Friday, 8:30a.m. to 5:30p.m. at 847 5th Street, Santa Rosa Deadline Fridays, 2:00pm which is in violation of the law. All persons are hereby informed that all dwellings advertised are available on an equal opportunity basis to the best of our knowledge. Homes ph: 707.527.1200 fax: 707.527.1288 g Employment Jobs Call 707-528-3160, email firstname.lastname@example.org or www.youravon.com/Lhadsell **BODYGUARDS WANTED** FREE Training for members. No Experience OK. Excellent $$$. Full & Part Time. Expenses Paid When you Travel. 1-615228-1701. www.psubodyguards.com (AAN CAN) a kind glass art pieces at incredible prices. Only at Tama Rama's in Downtown Cotati. 8252 Old Redwood Hwy, Cotati (707) 795-1425 g Adoptions Seeking: Female Sensual Massage Provider to share my clean, private, Northbay apartment. Call Liza 707-566-7866. g For Sale gggg Professional Services Financial Services Real Estate Rentals Shared Housing Home Services Contractors Pregnant? Considering Adoption? Talk with caring agency specializing in matching birthmothers with families nationwide. Living expenses paid. Call 24/7 Abby's One True Gift Adoptions. 866/413-6293 (AAN CAN) Computer Market High Fixed Interest Rates! Earn guaranteed 3.75% for 4 years. Call for details. Shelia L. Tyson CA Insurance License #0E72328 (707) 647-0641/(415) 773-8115. Member of the Better Business Bureau! ALL AREAS - RENTMATES.COM Browse hundreds of online listings with photos and maps. Find your roommate with a click of the mouse! Visit: www.Rentmates.com. (AAN CAN) ALL AREAS HOUSES FOR RENT Browse thousands of rental listings with photos and maps. Advertise your rental home for FREE! Visit: http://www.RealRentals.com (AAN CAN) Class: Rent or Lease Notice To Readers California law requires that contractors taking jobs that total $500 or more (labor or materials) be licensed by the Contractors State License Board. State law also requires that contractors include their license number on all advertising. You can check the status of your licensed contractor at www.cslb.ca.gov or 1-800-321CSLB (2752). Unlicensed contractors taking jobs that total less than $500 must state in their advertisements that they are not licensed by the Contractors State License Board. Classes & Instruction g Miscellaneous Attention Readers Some ads in this section may require an initial investment or fee. Metro Newspapers encourages you to thoroughly investigate any advertiser's claims before sending payment. Activists Brand New Laptops & Desktops g Business Opportunities Wanted through out Bay Area !! Help qualify California Initiatives. $15-$25 Hourly. Flexible hours. Please call 707-332-9118 g Bad Credit, No Credit � No Problem Small Weekly Payments - Order Today and get FREE Nintendo WII game system! Call Now � 800-840-5439 (AAN CAN) Your Personality Determines Your Happiness Know why? Call for your free personality test. Call 1-800-293-6463 Looking to Start a Business? AVON, the company for women. A $10 investment is all you need. For Sale Hand Blown Glass Art Makes a Great Gift Made by Local artists, One of All real estate advertised in the Bohemian Newspaper is subject to the State and Federal Fair Housing Act, which Consultants makes it illegal to advertise Tankless water heaters, any preference, limitation, or MacAdvantage high efficiency toilets, discrimination based on race, Macintosh recirculation, general color, religion, sex, handicap, FREE Diagnosis, Friendly plumbing needs family status (the presence of In-House Staff Hardware/ 707.528.8228 Software, DATA Recovery, children), or national origin, Internet, Email,Wireless Green Earth Catering or the intention to make any Network Setup & Security, such preference, limitation, or Organic and Earth friendly Apple Authorized discrimination. State and lo Business Agent, Tam Nguyen- foods and supplies cate laws forbid discriminaScott Goree - Entertainment Chief Tech, M-F 10-6 tion in the sale, rental, or email@example.com coordinator and business vertising of real estate. We 707.664.0400 manager. 707.795.7358 will not knowingly accept any home, 707.479.5481 cell advertising for real estate Water Conservation Experts. Friendly, Honest Service. Licensed, Bonded and Insured. License #871026. Santa Rosa Plumbing Notice All AreasRentmates.com gg Real Estate Services Services ACUPRESSURE & EASTERN BODYWORK CERTIFICATION Eastern Holistic Center, Sebastopol, CA. September 9 December 16, Wednesday evenings, plus one weekend each month. Discounts, scholarships & payment plans available. More info: (707) 823-4342 www.easternholisticcenter.com Browse hundreds of online listings with photos and maps. find your roommate with a click of the mouse! Visit: www.Rentmates.com. (AAN CAN) High School Diploma! Fast, affordable and accredited. Free brochure. Call Now!. 1-888532-6546 ext. 97 www.continentalacademy.com. (AAN CAN) Photography by Paul Burke 707.664.0178 firstname.lastname@example.org email@example.com Combine your momentous photos into a beautiful collage! Mark Schaumann 707.795.0924 firstname.lastname@example.org 52 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN HEALTH&WELL-BEING g g Classes & Workshops Man of Your Dreams Inspiring Clarity Workshop with horses at liberty, Oct. 16-18 with Christine Cole. Participant $575 Auditor $150. Call 707.887.8488 g Counseling & Therapy Men, women, couples. TLC, massage, Tantra, nurturing mutual touch. William 707-548-2187 A Safe Place To Be Real Full Body Sensual Massage Ahhh - Awaken Your Senses Psychics Great Massage By Joe, CMT. Relaxing hot tub and pool available. Will do outcalls. 707-228-6883. Massage & Relaxation THERAPY TODAY, FREEDOM TOMORROW Robert Leverant, MFT MFC27918 "Therapy that works". Free consultation interview. 707-823-0818. Stop procrastinating! Healing & Bodywork g Holistic tantric masseuse. Unhurried, private, heartfelt. Monday thru Saturday. NEW CLIENT DISCOUNT. 707-793-2232. With a mature, playful CMT. Comfortable incall location near the J.C. in Santa Rosa. Soothing, relaxing, and fun. Visa/MC accepted. Gretchen 707/478-3952. Moonlight Healthy Center Oriental Massage VISA OR MASTERCARD ACCEPTED FLOWER SPA Grand Opening Massage Reflexology Swedish/Shiatsu Open 7 Days: 10am-10pm Golden Flower Massage Spa 707.765.2233 136 Howard Street Petaluma g Lily Spa RELAX Asian Massage Thai � Deep Tissue Swedish � Hot Stone 1 HR/$65 90 MIN/$100 walk-ins or appt Therapeutic Massage John CMT, Ten years experience. Santa Rosa. Introductory massage $50/hour, outcalls negotiable 707-327-7825. MEN! Get a massage � Swedish & Deep Deep Relaxing Full Body Massage To total Completion by a mature male $40/hour. Napa Valley location. Roger 707-525-1771. Tissue Massage � Hot Stone Massage 1626 4th St. Santa Rosa 707.526.6888 699 Petaluma Blvd. N 707.765.1879 Open 7 days 9am-10pm the way you like it. Swedish and deep tissue techniques. Relaxing and rejuvenating. Flexible schedule for your convenience. Outcalls available. Call James 707-477-4365. Psychic Palm Nurturing, pampering, therapeutic/sensual massage. and Card Reader Special Summer rate. CMT in Madame Lisa. Truly gifted Santa Rosa. 415/717-9378 adviser for all problems. 827 Santa Rosa Ave. Call for Body Rubs Your Way Appointment 707-542-9898 In a safe, relaxing, comfortable space by a "mature", compatible, easy-going gentleman! Since 1991 I`ve provided pleasure to women, men, couples. Good virtues. NW Santa Rosa, Jimmy, 707-799-4467 or 707-527-9497. Cindy Cross, CMT Call 707.527.1200 Advertise in the Health & Well Being Today! 707.528.2540 3401 Cleveland Ave #2 Santa Rosa Grand Opening HEAVENLY TOUCH Beautiful Asian Massage $50/hour $35/half hour New Customers 15 minutes FREE n Need a relaxing massage? Come in for Swedish, Deep Tissue, Tui Na, Reiki, Lifestream, Acupressure and see what a difference it can make. Call 707.665.9020. Julia's Private Oasis First Time Client Special! A peaceful place in Santa 90 minutes for $60. Cindy Rosa. Relaxing, unhurried full Cross, C.M.T. 665-9020 body massage with a caring, By appointment only beautiful, fit lady. Sally 707-578-5444. Grand Opening! Massage $55 hr � Deep Tissue/Swedish � Sports � Shiatzu � Back Walking � Foot Reflexology � Chair $10/10 min massage Health - Relaxation - Stress Relief - Experienced CMT Chinese Medicine & Massage Therapy Center FREE CONSULTATION with a Chinese medicine expert & Qi Gong Master. Treatment for pain & injury. Extensive traditional Chinese herbal pharmacy Happy Health Spa open 10-10, 7 days 525 Ross St, Santa Rosa 707-591-8899 RELAX! Relaxing massage and bodywork by male massage therapist with 10 yrs experience. 707-542-6856 n 11am-9pm 161B Kentucky St, Petaluma 707.778.7888 � 626.627.8028 Russian River Massage Full body massage, body electric experience. In /Out. www.bobrrmassage.com Bob 707-865-2093. NOW OPEN Therapeutic Massage Center Body Massage $55/hr Bring in this ad for $10.00 off Body massage MORE THAN 15 MASSAGE TECHNIQUES FOR PERFECT RELAXATION Swedish, Deep Tissue, Acupressure, Reflexology Qi Gong � Thai Chi � Acupucture Cupping herbs � Infrared Sauna � Same-day Appointments Walk-ins Welcome � Treatments Start at $20 - Insurance Accepted Gift Certificates � Open 7 days, 10 AM to 8 PM Strong Thorough and Intuitive 30 yrs experience. Excellent Rates! 1/2 hour, hour or 90 mins. Colin, CMT 707-823-2990. Windsor: 4 Men Brent, C.M.T. 26 years experience. Nurturing, intuitive touch. Private, discrete studio. 707/477-0400. Open 7 days 9-10pm Foot Massage $19.99/45 min 2460 Mendocino Ave., Santa Rosa 707.578.3088 707.762.9111 � 172 Keller Street, Petaluma THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 53 For the week of Sept. 2 Low Cost Vaccination Clinics every Sunday, 9:30-11am WESTERN FARM CENTER 707.545.0721 21 West 7th St. Santa Rosa Meet Jill � Cat of the Week Hi I'm Jill. I've only got 3 and 1/2 legs but that doesn't stop me from getting around just fine - that mostly includes rolling over so my tummy can be rubbed and so you can stroke my lovely, lovely, soft fur! And I'll make you laugh every time you look at me with my silly little Groucho moustache.......I'm a keeper! To learn more about adopting Jill or many other homeless animals at the Sonoma Humane Society, please visit us at 5345 Hwy 12 West, Santa Rosa (@ Llano Rd), open everyday from 12-6pm, or check us out online at www.SonomaHumane.org The Adoption Center is open 7 days a week from 12PM - 6PM and is located at 5345 Highway 12 West, Santa Rosa (just 5 miles west of Hwy 101 @ Llano Rd) www.sonomahumane.org Place your pet related ad here today! Call 707.527.1200 Meet Zipper � Cat of the Week MEET ZIPPER - Zipper is one fabulous cat! He sits and waits at the door for your attention and then paws at your legs to be lifted up and cuddled. And boy, can he cuddle! He's got a great purr, is a real conversationalist and the world's most affectionate kitty � and did we mention, he's good looking?! What's not to like?! To learn more about adopting Zipper or many other homeless animals at the Sonoma Humane Society, please visit us at 5345 Hwy 12 West, Santa Rosa (@ Llano Rd), open everyday from 126pm, or check us out online at www.SonomaHumane.org The Adoption Center is open 7 days a week from 12PM - 6PM and is located at 5345 Highway 12 West, Santa Rosa (just 5 miles west of Hwy 101 @ Llano Rd) www.sonomahumane.org Meet Lucy � Dog of the Week HI I'M LUCY and how can you resist this sweetheart of a face? I'm a shy 1-year old Rottweiler mix with lots of love to give to my special person. I'm a lover, not a fighter and a people dog, not a dog dog. So if you want a great companion, an adorable face, and a loving heart � I'm the dog for you! To learn more about adopting Lucy or many other homeless animals at the Sonoma Humane Society, please visit us at 5345 Hwy 12 West, Santa Rosa (@ Llano Rd), open everyday from 126pm, or check us out online at www.SonomaHumane.org The Adoption Center is open 7 days a week from 12PM - 6PM and is located at 5345 Highway 12 West, Santa Rosa (just 5 miles west of Hwy 101 @ Llano Rd) www.sonomahumane.org In addition to this column, Rob Brezsny offers expanded weekly audio horoscopes and daily text message horoscopes. To buy access, go to www.realastrology.com. The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1.877.873.4888 or 1.900.950.7700. 54 09.02.09-09.08.09 THE BOHEMIAN To place your ad call 707.527.1200 BOHEMIAN FLIPSIDE W T T 1 relational transformation. Sat, Aug 15, 9:00am - Noon, Journey Center, Santa Rosa, 707-578-2121, www.journeycenter.org Law Office of Evan E. Zelig Criminal Defense Call today! 707.636.3204 or Toll Free; 888.ZELIGLAW. Available 24/7 ACUPRESSURE & EASTERN BODYWORK CERTIFICATION Eastern Holistic Center, Sebastopol, CA. September 9 - December 16, Wednesday evenings, plus one weekend each month. Discounts, scholarships & payment plans available. More info: (707) 823-4342 www.easternholisticcenter.com If you or someone you know is being accused or charged with a crime, please do not wait to retain counsel. Contact the Law Office of Evan E. Zelig today! GRAND OPENING 20-50% OFF EVERYTHING except tobacco products MacAdvantage Macintosh Computer Repair FREE Diagnosis, Friendly In-House Staff Answer Calls, Hardware/Software, DATA Recovery, Internet, Email, Wireless Network Setup & Security, Apple Authorized Business Agent, Tam Nguyen-Chief Tech, M-F 10-6. [ mail to:email@example.com ] 707.664.0400, firstname.lastname@example.org Rocks and Clouds Zendo Meditation and Dharma Talk Wednesday nights, 7:00 p.m. 618 South Main Street, Sebastopol. www.rocksandclouds.org 707/824-5647. Secrets of the Vine Jesus said, "I am the vine; you are the branches." Walk the vineyards of the Parade Ridge Winery and discuss the care of the vine in our county and in our spiritual lives. Wed, Sep 9, 6:30 p.m. Cost: $15. Journey Center, Santa Rosa, 707-578-2121, More info at www.journeycenter.org Joe Louvar Productions QUALITY LIVE AUDIO RECORDING 707.479.0050 The Enneagram: A Tool for Transformation (Free Introductory Workshop) Introduction to an ancient tool for personal and Goebel Builders Jay Goebel General Contractor, Lic. #812957 Quality Workmanship, Friendly Service, and Dependability You Can Trust. Insured with Local references Repairs, Custom Builds, and Troubleshooting Call today and get the job DONE! 707-794-7955 www.goebelbuilders.com SPIRITUAL CONNECTIONS Finding inspiration and connecting with your community Mahakaruna Buddhist Meditation Center Offers ongoing introductory and advanced classes. Weds at noon, Tues & Weds evenings 7:30�8:45pm Prayers for World Peace, Sun, 10:30�11:45am Everyone welcome 304 Petaluma Blvd., North, Petaluma www.meditationinnorcal.org waterpipes � pipes hookahs � bubblers great selection of vaporizors Ladies, your pink hookah, pipe or waterpipe is ready to be picked up Mention Bohemian ad for FREE pipe! The Journey Center: Christ-centered Spirituality, Healing, & Wholeness Reading room, art gallery, prayer/ meditation gatherings, spiritual journey resources, bodywork, bookstore, free WiFi. 1601 Fourth Street, Santa Rosa. www.journeycenter.org 707.578.2121 Youth Failing School or School Failing Our Youth ? Try Rancho Bodega School - Small Group/One on One Instruction - Enriched Middle/High School Curriculum - Special Studies/Independent Study Emphasizing Music & Art Serving Grades 7-12 NOW ENROLLING !! Call 707-795-7166 www.ranchobodegaschool.com Open 7 days 9am-9pm Euro Business Solutions Exploring The Human Element in Business. Call us for a FREE, expert consultation @ 707.483.5135. Our Team Does it All; from Website to Powerful Staff Motivation. Ask About Our Stimulus Package. 707.546.5424 1321 Guerneville Rd, Ste B1, Santa Rosa across from Coddingtown Mall "Turning the Mind Into An Ally" Why is Meditation Beneficial? 5 week class at Santa Rosa Shambhala Center www.santarosa.shambhala.org Green Earth Catering Organic and Earth friendly foods and supplies Scott Goree - Entertainment coordinator and business manager. 707.795.7358 home, 707.479.5481 cell email@example.com Browse, Test Drive, Purchase the Car ...of Your Dreams! You deserve the attention. Outstanding owner service. Luxury vehicles for market prices. Share your organization's inspiration with over 95,100 Bohemian Readers monthly! Phone: 707.527.1200 email: firstname.lastname@example.org Photography by Paul Burke 707.664.0178 email@example.com Advertise on the FlipSide Call 707.527.1200 today and be seen more than in any other section of the Bohemian! Owner Jesus Ochoa 27 years Quality MOTORS LLC www.autotrader.com click on Quality Motors, LLC 2620 Santa Rosa Ave, Santa Rosa | 707.569.7437 THE BOHEMIAN 09.02.09-09.08.09 55 SANTA ROSA TREATMENT PROGRAM 1901 CLEVELAND AVE SUITE B SANTA ROSA 707.576.0818 www.srtp.net We provide treatment for: Oxycontin, Vicodin and Heroin utilizing replacement medications. We also treat Methamphetamine and other stimulant dependence. d Your Personality Determines Your Happiness Know why? Call for your free personality test. Call 1-800-293-6463 Into This World Yoga Teacher Training Yoga Alliance Registered School! 200-hour and 500-hour programs. Continuing Education for Yoga Teachers! Visit www.intothisworld.net or call 707-664-9560 Medicann - Med. 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