Skeptics BE damned
•It wasn’t so bad that I wanted to kill myself. Cliché number one: my head hurt almost as medicine you and your doctor try has about a 70% chance of helping. Cognitive and much as my heart. I had none of the call signs of someone who was about ready to go interpersonal psychotherapies may also be effective” (23). • My doctor was patient with his into a case of severe clinical depression. I had gone through no cognitive or social class medical advice and dispensed the correct amount and type of antidepressant for me. His desire changes. I had no color blindness or deep sense of despair. I was not a woman in a high stress to make my mind at ease was so severely genuine; I had no other choice but to sincerely relationship suddenly missing the necessary intimacy. I was not bipolar or schizophrenic make myself vulnerable to him. • The psychotherapy we were to undergo for the next (Angst 32-34). Symptoms aside, I most certainly did undertake a truly difficult and disruptive few months was in the school of Carl Jung. It is important to note that the modern depressive episode. • The doctors describe it as a sort of Civil War inside the brain. Cliché “psychiatric community so thoroughly mistrusts his revolutionary insights or dismisses number two: I tried to convince myself that nothing was wrong. I went through what was him as a ‘mystic’” for the reason that he: “was unwilling to force what seemed to him called a Major Depressive Episode, which is defined as “a loss of interest or pleasure in all, paradoxical and contradictory material into a logical framework which would then or almost all, activities, and associated symptoms for a period of at least two weeks. The become a dogmatic schema. His interest in charting new territories rather than symptoms represent a change from previous functioning and are relatively persistent, that systematically correlating the areas he had already covered often appears confusing to is, they occur for most of the day, nearly every day” (Greist, 116). In an attempt to dispel the [unfamiliar] reader…All too often Jung has been quoted out of context or even any rumor or hearsay about this topic, my goal is to provide evidence in the form of academic misquoted, thus made to express the very opposite of what he intended to convey” proof and personal testimony that medical treatment, psychotherapy and a strong support (Hochheimer vii). • The most applicable of Jung’s writings to me was: “If, formerly, my system are integral in the healing process of the related disorders of depression and alcoholism. • patient clung to his intellectual world and defended himself with rationalizations against I will explain my condition in detail now, to provide a good understanding of how the what he regarded as his illness, he must now yield himself up to it entirely and when a fit of treatment in all its detail was responsible for my recovery. In the wake of the most depression comes upon him, he must no longer force himself to some kind of work in emotionally co-dependent relationship I was ever involved in, I stood in a new order to forget, but must accept his depression and give it hearing” (Hochheimer, 84). It was apartment, in a new town with a brand new Creative Writing major. My life was in this actualization that I found the most important truth about my situation. I was hiding changing around me, and the sudden lack of comfort and structure left me with many feelings behind alcohol, my own pain, and my own embarrassment about that pain and behind of inadequacy. Greist writes, “Depression is almost always caused by a combination of my misunderstanding of depression as a weakness. When forced to confront these things factors… psychological factors such as intense grief reactions, and stress…Each individual has in his office, my doctor sat by my side as a catharsis of tears and laughter became visible in a pattern of genetic, developmental, environmental, social, personality, my body and my mind. It is not at all uncommon in psychotherapy for and physiological factors that combine to permit or protect against depression” “patients and their doctors [to] talk about the experiences patients have had (8). As my condition worsened, I began self-medicating with large amounts and are having… Psychotherapies alone are less effective for more severe of alcohol, and copious amounts of marijuana. The response was not at depressions, but may be helpful in improving relationships, thinking patterns, all uncommon as Greist writes, “Sometimes depressions are hidden or or behaviors that may have led to depression. General support of depressed ‘masked’—patients…may abuse alcohol or other drugs in attempts at patients is always beneficial and may sustain them through their suffering self-treatment of depression” (51). At the worst point of my condition, I even if other treatments are ineffective” (Greist 43). • He told me that day was drinking about twenty drinks per day and smoking nearly an eighth of that his greatest joy in psychotherapy was watching his patients meet an ounce of marijuana per day. • This, in combination with an unfulfilled their moments of clarity (he admittedly stole that phrase from Alcoholemotional void left by my ex, and the quickly declining levels of serotonin ics Anonymous). • “Hello. My name is Nick, and I’m an alcoholic.” The third, in my brain (Gotlib, 3), moved me quickly into the Depressive Episode, and most proactive, part of my recovery was the realization that I could no which was to last for six long weeks. I couldn’t eat. My stomach turned at longer self-medicate. My first day of A.A. was probably the most difficult the thought of food. Lack of food intake and the dehydration from the exmental process of my life. Admitting that at 21, I had a drinking problem had treme amounts of alcohol caused severe headaches. I was expressing combeen hard enough to do in front of my family and therapist. Now, I was going mon symptoms in standard depression cases: “Clinical descriptions of do it in front of a room full of strangers. Just as I was told by my uncle (once depressed people are graphic in indicating considerable disruption in their a sponsee, now a sponsor), it was far less difficult than I had imagined. I was functioning at work, as friends or at leisure, and in intimate relationships” to find out that I was an Alpha case alcoholic (Miller 2). I was happy and (Gotlib 21). I began having fits of anger, hot flashes, fainting spells that were surprised to find that this was the lowest and least dangerous form. It is defined all due to the high levels of mental and physical stress I was subjecting my as “an alcohol addiction defined by daily drinking accompanied by no loss of body to. In addition to the extreme physical harshness I was putting control; alcohol used to cope with life” (Miller 2). Once I understood what myself through, it had become important that I recognize the emotional my addiction entailed and the reasons for it, it was much easier not only to impact of my Episode before it destroyed me from the inside. • The most admit my problem, but also to seek out solutions. • Once it became clear supportive part of the recovery process was the love of my very that alcohol had become “a relief from dis-ease or a vaguely uncomfortable emotionally stable family. Ian Gotlib writes, “Individuals in the depressed feeling” and that “when any small quantity of alcohol was ingested, an person’s social environment respond immediately to these depressive overwhelming psychophysical demand for more manifested itself” (Dorris symptoms with genuine concern and support. The depressive’s behaviors 32-33). I realized it had become time for a change. As an intellectually gradually become demands, however, that are expressed with increasing minded person, concerned with deeper understanding and enlightenment, frequency. Consequently, the depressive’s behavior becomes aversive and the most interesting finding in my own alcoholism was that “few people realize elicits feelings of resentment and anger from other family members” (73). that sobriety requires insights and skills far beyond those needed merely to My family broke the mold by treating me with selflessness and respect. quite drinking. Sobriety is a creative discipline in the arts of freedom, of They never wavered in their support of my problem, and that was such growth, and of human relationships, demanding so much more than social an important factor in my recovery. By consistently telling me of their sanction, punitive reaction, and moral censure” (Dorris 1). I was aware of intentions to help me through my problems, my resentment of their help how my more intellectual desires had been superceded by my desire to moves to appreciation over time. My mother has been a nurse for years forget and drown out everything. This actualization was probably the and believes in medicine unequivocally. • It was only with great urging most important in my recovery from the alcoholism and depression alike. from her that I was finally able to go to a doctor to tell him I was having It was as though the group meetings were an extension of my psychotrouble controlling my emotions. And it wasn’t even that I was having therapy; these people were alcoholics like me and could understand trouble controlling them. It was as if they had all but disappeared. I had the attached emotional hardships. I realized and remembered how much I sincerely lost the desire to feel anything at all. My body was literally too loved life for its intricacies in literature, music, philosophy etc. I had a reason By Blaine Anthony tired and lacking in necessary nutrients to feed my mind with the to wake up in the morning again. I had a reason to stay cognitive. It was to chemicals it needed to function properly at work and at home. Universally, notice and comment on and clarify the beauty in the smallest parts of that life a depressive will likely experience “changes in sleep and appetite, and sometimes I had before my depression. It was to write. This moment of clarity is common amongst attendant aches and pains” (Gotlib 3). The problems my mind had created were depressives when “the patient will realize their previous worth and the innately threatened by the problems in my body, which created more problems in my mind. Gotlib redeeming qualities of everyday life” (Dorris 89). Due to my willingness to recognize my explains the situation, “A depressed man may have paralyzing doubts about his ability to own problem, and the supportiveness of the group, I was able to quickly recover from my perform a new job and find that his work is indeed impaired by his difficulty in concentrating short fight with alcoholism. • It was a personal revelation that led me to my “moment of due to the high level of stress. It has become a circular war” (3). With my mother’s help clarity”…a revelation that was fueled by positive thinking in the form of psychotherapy and and attentive love, I was able to admit that I could not fight this on my own. Although a medication, and the support of a loving family and support system of understanding and number of depressives will most definitely not be provided with a loving family like mine, sympathetic friends. Many Americans suffer daily from a condition that many do not even it aids in the process greatly to know that there is the possibility of assistance from the comprehend as abnormal. It is important, in the midst of this nation built on strength and people who care. Ian Gotlib explains, “Research by Moos’ group has consistently power, to rise above the pride-fueled social structure and recognize depression for what it implicated quality of family relationships as factors in both adult and child depression” is, and not for what it is not. Weakness is the absence of power, but humility and acceptance (185). It would appear that I was truly blessed to have a loving, tender environment in are two key components to any successful recovery. Those shunned by their family and which I could easily bounce back. • The second part of my recovery process was the friends for recognizing and having the courage to admit they have a problem with depression acceptance of my problem and the responsibilities involved. I had admitted to myself and are indeed forsaken by those who should love them most. In most post-modern theory, to those around me that I was in desperate need of some sort of assistance. The doctors there has become little room for the ideas of hope and faith. In defense of certainty, I say involved surprised me with their compassion and understanding. Over the course of the the skeptics be damned. It is not so bad to hope for the future and be certain of the things treatment process, I began to bond with my doctor in a way that I had never thought we cannot see. For me and for the sake of others, the introduction and combination of possible with a professional. The process was longer and more involved than I had psychotherapy and prescription medicine has, and will continue to lead to the purging of previously thought. Greist says of antidepressants, “All of the medications…are effective in depression and alcoholism. thesamepercentageofpeople. However,agivenindividualmaybenefitfromoneantidepressant Works Cited Angst, J. The Origins of Depression: Current Concepts and Approaches. Berlin: Springer-Verlag, 1983. and not from another” (56). Deciphering the most effective medication was a process of Dorris, Robert, T. Counseling on Alcoholism and Related Disorders. California: Glencoe Press, 1968. Gotlib, Ian, H. Psychological Aspects of Depression: Toward a Cognitive-Interpersonal Integration. Chichester: John Wiley & Sons, 1992. trial and error ultimately ending with a sertraline called Zoloft. In his book “Depression and Greist, John, H. Depression and Its Treatment. Washington D.C.: American Psychiatric Press Inc., 1992. its Treatment” Dr. John H. Greist writes, “Treatments are very effective! The first antidepressant Hochheimer, Wolfgang. The Psychotherapy of C.G. Jung. Toronto: Longmans Canada Limited, 1969.