OCTOBER • NOVEMBER 2013
VOL 3. ISSUE 5
Same Results... Different Journey!
Inspiring Women Fabulous40rties.com | 1
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Gift Cards for all occasions! 2 | October • November 2013
OCTOBER • NOVEMBER 2013
HEALTH • WELLNESS
ON THE COVER 6
HOME • ENTERTAINMENT
CARING FOR THE COMMUNITY
SUBSCRIBE • CONTACT
Same Results...Different Journey
Photography by Bill Barbosa Photography Beauty Services provided by Edmund James Salon & Spa Makeup by Katherine MacDonald, Luca Cosmetics
Fabulous40rties.com | 3
Letter from the Publishers
e are in awe of so many women’s strength, determination, and fight. We are honored to dedicate this issue to Breast Cancer Awareness. As you read our feature story “Same Results, Different Journey” we hope it encourages women to remember their monthly self-exams and to make that appointment for their mammogram. You must take care of yourself first, and early detection is the key. Stories are shared and events are planned to honor survivors and those who did not win their battle. Additionally, they are there to keep awareness high and teach women how to better avoid the battles with breast cancer. We must be diligent. We also come in to the season of thanks. As we look around each day we need to keep in mind that we all have a story; we all have hardships, we all have struggles. Be grateful for the positive moments in our lives and the love we receive from the people around us. Thanksgiving is the time of year to reflect on what we are thankful for. It is also a time to do something for the less fortunate. No matter how big or small the gesture, it is well received and personally rewarding. Helping others has a positive affect on your life and outlook. After Halloween and Thanksgiving comes and goes, the gift giving holidays are here before we know it. As you begin to create a budget for gift giving, keep in mind that a kind thought or a handmade gift is the cheapest gift with the greatest appreciation from others. You can’t put a price on thoughtfulness! Also, do not allow the chaos and shuffle leading up to the holidays take away from your health. Be sure to continue an exercise routine, eat healthy and enjoy treasured moments with friends and family. Schedule yourself the time, again, to take care of yourself first. You will be surprised how much you can actually accomplish in the day, and the increased energy you will have when shifting your attention towards your holiday workload. Thank you for your continued inspiration, and stay dedicated to being FABULOUS!
4 | October • November 2013
Nina Anschuetz • Deena Buell
Chris Seal – Sealebration Creations
BUSINESS AFFAIRS McHale & Slavin, P.A.
CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS Bill Barbosa Photography Stephi’s Fotografia
Lauren Adams • Ellen Fox-Snider • Howard Freedland Jathynia Garcia • Patti Gilliano • Lisa Goodman Jacqueline Gray • Stuart Hack • Lois Morganti Patty Norton • Arlene Paukert • Dr. Shelley Plumb Dr. Carlos E. Ramirez • Dr. Al Sears, MD • Amy Shainman Rochelle Sydney • Becca Tebon • Sherry Thomas • Pamela Yellen
Nina Anschuetz • Deena Buell
EDITOR AND RESEARCH ANALYST Lisa Goodman
EDITORIAL INTERN Riley Smith
Shutterstock.com • Google Images
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Digital Menu Network - Orville O. Osbourne
Contact Us We value our readers’ feedback! We would love to hear your Fabulous thoughts!
Send us topic suggestions, surveys, or what you would enjoy reading about: Deena@Fabulous40rties.com Nina@Fabulous40rties.com 561-758-8325 / 561-714-7240 4095 State Road 7, Suite L-185 Wellington, FL 33449
Copyright ©2013 Fabulous 40rties. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part without written permission is forbidden. Fabulous 40rties Magazine is owned and operated by DANG, LLC and is a complimentary publication distributed bi-monthly in Palm Beach County, FL. It can be found in doctor, dental and medical offices, day spas, hair and nail salons, local schools, boutiques, and other various locations where women are waiting, shopping and pampering. Fabulous 40rties Magazine does not necessarily endorse the views expressed in the articles and advertisements, nor are we responsible for the products and services advertised. Always consult your physician before beginning any exercise program. Any general information included in this publication is not intended to diagnose any medical condition or to replace your healthcare professional.
Kicking Cancer in the Kitchen by Annette Ramke & Kendall Scott Reviewed by Rachel Pinkstone-Marx, Living Beyond Breast Cancer (lbbc.org)
hen you flip open the cover of Kicking Cancer in the Kitchen you learn that this book is “THE resource for the woman who has been handed the cancer card—and for the one who never wants to get it.” However, I think that it’s categorized even better in their dedication. This book is for: All those who have faced a major life challenge and kept moving forward with determination, because they just have way to much living left to do. Authors Annette Ramke and Kendall Scott are both cancer survivors, and in this sassy and insightful book of recipes and stories, they share real-life knowledge and experience about the healing power of food, along with a look into their journeys with cancer. The intentions of the book are to help and comfort women dealing with the struggles and dietary mazes that come along with cancer treatment, but–don’t get me wrong– Kicking Cancer in the Kitchen is a resource that would definitely appeal to the health/diet-conscious person, whether they have cancer or not. As you break the book down, you note that you can enjoy two large and very different sections of the book: a “Girlfriend’s Guide,” filled with the authors’ stories, nutrition information and advice, and a second half filled with plant-based recipes. In the “cookbook” portion, the recipes range from being as easy as throwing a few ingredients into a blender for a “Gorgeous Green” or “Superfood” smoothie, to moderate difficulty for your “Seitan Strogonoff.” However, nothing seems out of a beginner chef ’s reach. The center of the book is most likely where you will get lost, as you peruse the beautiful photographs of a selection of the finished products as you choose what meal to make yourself. This uplifting cookbook/memoir will not let you down, as it is written like a guide coming directly from the heart: girlfriendstyle. I’m sure you’ll find it hard to pick out just ONE recipe as your favorite!
Publisher’s Favorite App mGifts - Gift List Manager by mSeven Software, LLC
oliday shopping gets very organized when you use this app, which lets you enter info about your holiday gift plans and then view the information by gift, person, store or group. The groups feature lets you create categories like “family” and “work,” and then makes it easy to get an overview of how much you’re spending on each group. A photo feature lets you use pictures to make sure you’re buying the right item for someone. You can also add notes. Status flags for each gift help you keep track of whether you’ve bought it yet or sent it out. mGifts covers much more than just the winter holiday gifts. It includes birthdays and anniversaries, too, for example. You can enter information such as birthdays with pre-defined templates for spouse, son, daughter, friend and co-worker, etc. The stores category also comes pre-populated with dozens of big chains, such as Target, Office Depot, Sears, Petsmart, etc. Organize your Gift List: • Organize, view and edit lists by gift, person, store, and groups • View gift list by store to better plan your shopping trips • Create groups like family and co-worker to better budget and prioritize your gift list • Uses status flags like “needed”, “purchased”, “wrapped” or “shipped”, to help track the entire gifting process • Snaps a photo of a gift to make sure you get the right item • Saves photos and notes of your family and friend profiles to remind you of important details • View by Store makes your shopping trips more efficient Share your Gift List between your Devices and People:
• Auto-Sync via iCloud so that all gift lists can be kept current on all your devices at all times • Share your list via email and via the clipboard • Optional 4-digit PIN to keep out the curious
$.99 (Free version available called “Christmas”)
Fabulous40rties.com | 5
Same Results... Different Journey!
Amy Byer Shainman
Two stories of survival, written by Amy Byer Shainman and Jacqueline R. “Jackie” Gray
know that I am greater than the sum of my parts.
Like a tinted moisturizer with SPF, I am luminous, joyful, and now better protected. Like a soothing eye cream, the crow’s feet around my eyes have been diminished knowing I have drastically reduced my risk for any future “wrinkles” in my life. I am what is called a previvor-someone who has never had cancer but has an extraordinarily high risk for getting it. I inherited a BRCA1 gene mutation from my Dad. I had up to an 87% chance of getting breast cancer in my lifetime and up to a 50% risk of getting ovarian cancer in my lifetime (normal population: 10% and 4% respectively). My grandmother died at age 33 from breast cancer, her mother died of ovarian cancer at age 46. However, we only really looked at our family “medical” tree when my 48-year-old sister Jan was diagnosed with both ovarian cancer and uterine cancer (two separate primary cancers) in 2008. It was then we learned that she carried the BRCA1 (#5385) genetic mutation. One out of every 40 Jewish people carries a mutation in the BRCA1 or BRCA2 gene. A BRCA gene mutation can be passed down from either mother OR father to daughters AND sons. My friend Kristin Hoke was also BRCA1 positive and battling triple negative breast cancer. Two BRCA cancer battles were happening in front of me altering my perspective on everything. I thought to myself, “Yes, I have inherited this very dangerous genetic mutation but I have been given the gift of having options to drastically reduce my cancer risk. Knowing that I can actually do something to prevent what Kristin and Jan are going through and even avoid death--I can’t just sit on this knowledge and do nothing.”
6 | October • November 2013
photos by Bill Barbosa Photography
I underwent two prophylactic (preventative) surgeries in 2010; a complete hysterectomy and a skin-sparing, nipplesparing mastectomy with reconstruction.
Surgery drastically reduced my cancer risk. This was the right decision for me. Other options for breast cancer risk reduction: Tamoxifen, enhanced surveillance/screenings. However, there are currently no accurate ovarian cancer surveillance/screening methods. If you are concerned about your cancer risk, the best first step is to contact a genetics expert/counselor. To find a genetic counselor near you please go to: The National Society of Genetic Counselors www.nsgc.org For accurate information on hereditary cancer please go to: FORCE - Facing Our Risk of Cancer Empowered: www.facingourrisk.org My hereditary cancer memoir “Resurrection Lily” will be available early 2014.
uring a routine checkup in January 2007 I discovered I had breast cancer. Needless to say, I was shocked, I wasn’t even 40 yet. In rapid succession immediately following my diagnosis, my first cousin was diagnosed and later, that same year I lost my sister, the day before Thanksgiving to breast cancer. I had a right breast lumpectomy, which left my breast deformed, thirty eight treatments of radiation, tamoxifen, and constant doctor visits. To get through this very difficult time, I relied mostly on my husband Kevin and my faith. He is truly incredible. He did not leave my side. He went to all of my appointments and waited in waiting rooms over and over again. One of my fondest memories is of him peeling off all the dead skin that was burnt during radiation therapy, without flinching. The disease is debilitating, I was very ill for nearly a year. Not being able to keep anything in my stomach and after the radiation left my right lung weak, I needed that support system in place. After weathering a devastating 2007, we began to conceptualize the idea of Woman to Woman Breast Cancer. Working with my husband Kevin and daughter Keandra we began to build a resource that provides institutional support, so that no woman needs to suffer the consequences of breast cancer alone.
I believe that “to win the battle against any illness, you must embrace each moment. [If you do], there is nothing in the world you can’t conquer.” Even if you lose the battle, you can continue to touch the life of another person through the legacy of your own struggles or victories.
Jacqueline R. “Jackie” Gray
Today as a 46 year old survivor, and my intimate understanding of life with, and life after, breast cancer it affords me a sensitive platform, from which I empower survivors and inform the community through a, vibrant style. Today, I live to encourage, I live to educate, and I live to love. photos by Bill Barbosa Photography
Fabulous40rties.com | 7
HEALTH • WELLNESS
Massage & Kids...Really?
by Patti Gilliano MSN, RN LaVida Massage Owner
et a massage for my child – are you kidding? There are benefits of massage in children when you consider the stressors affecting children. For centuries, the effects of massage have been shown to improve mood and physical and emotional well-being. Those same effects hold true for children. Studies have shown that children actually improve overall by incorporating massage into their lifestyles. Documented literature is now showing a connection between kids with cancer, muscular dystrophy, fibromyalgia, autism, and ADD all benefiting from reduced anxiety, stress, and improved attention as a result of regular massage. Those benefits extend to reduced pain, improved self-esteem, enhanced body image, decreased behavioral issues, and an overall sense of well-being. Stress is not just for adults. Kids face the same realities when dealing with difficulties. Facing many today are financial challenges, divorce, illness, bullying, or dealing with puberty. There is a relationship between stress and the immune system. One of the best ways to defend the system is to reduce the stressors. This is a great way to improve health and wellness before the body is overtaxed and succumbs to illnesses. Sports play a big role in many children’s lives and another reason for massage. Sports massage is one of the only therapies that may be safely applied as a preventative measure – its main benefit is to lower the risk of injury during sports. Massage techniques result in increasing local blood circulation, bringing oxygen and vital nutrients to the muscles, and removing waste (toxins) that builds up after exercise. Muscle tissue becomes more flexible with functional exercise, giving the child a greater range of motion and freedom of movement. Incorporating wellness and massage into the entire family’s lifestyle is our goal at LaVida Massage, where you can take time for yourself, and your children, to invest in family wellness, all at an affordable price. Working hard, playing hard, or dealing with physically or emotionally challenging moments are why we are here to help all ages relax… We are here for you.
561-790-7755 129 South State Rd 7, Suite 403 Royal Palm Beach, FL 33414 Ref: www.massagetherapy.com/articles/index.php/article_id/470/childrenand massage www.massagetherapy.com/articles/index.php/article_id/929/helpingchildrenfind focus www.liddlekidz.com/massgeand autism www.wellnessdenver.com/tag/massagetherapy forkids
8 | October • November 2013
Welcome to my column where I will answer common questions about women’s health issues.
by Dr. Carlos E. Ramirez
Q: Since October is Breast Cancer Awareness month, I was wondering how do I prevent breast cancer?
Q: What is vaginal rejuvenation?
A: Family history and genetic predisposition cannot be
A: It is a general term (aka vaginoplasty or vaginal reconstruc-
changed. However, lifestyle changes can lower your risk of developing breast cancer by limiting alcohol, not smoking, controlling your weight with a healthy diet, and staying physically active. Empower yourself by performing, monthly self-examinations. If you notice any changes in your breasts, like a new lump, skin changes, or nipple discharge, consult your doctor. If, because of genetic predisposition, breast cancer cannot be prevented, early detection can help when the likelihood of successful treatment is greatest. I support screening mammograms beginning at age 40 as to detect breast abnormalities with great accuracy. Also, evidence-based studies have demonstrated that lesions detected by screening mammography in women in their 40’s had a decrease in breast cancer deaths by almost 30%.
Q: Why do women get constipated 7-10 days before their monthly cycle? A: A very frequent condition, constipation is usually due
to the effects of progesterone, a naturally produced female hormone that functions in the menstrual cycle to prepare the lining of the uterus for a fertilized ovum. To combat constipation, eat lots of fresh vegetables, whole grains, nuts, seeds and fruit. Regular exercise increases bowel motility. Increase water intake to help keep the stool soft. Consider medications if needed, but mostly healthy habits will work well.
tion) that refers to aesthetic surgical procedures to help tighten and support the vagina and its’ structures. Childbirth and the natural aging process cause the vagina not to function the same in terms of lubrication, feelings, sensation and support. These conditions may cause dryness, pain during intercourse, bleeding, mass-like sensation and loss of urine. Vaginal reconstruction may be a solution to relieve these symptoms as it has been shown to improve lubrication and sexual function. Management includes the use of exercises, medications, minimal surgery or a combination. Treatment is designed to enhance lubrication and pelvic support. Procedures are tailored to tighten the inside of the vaginal canal and opening. Vaginal reconstruction is a functional procedure that enhances the quality of life. If you have similar symptoms, consult your health care provider. I hope these topics have awakened your awareness. Submit your questions for consideration. Be healthy and stay safe, Dr. Eddie Dr. Carlos E Ramirez is a Diplomat of The American Board of Obstetrics and Gynecology. His practice is located at 238 NE 1st Avenue, Delray Beach, FL. You can contact him at (561) 270-3164 or at www.womenswellnessinstitute.org.
Fabulous40rties.com | 9
Intense workout… Intense results!
nterval or High-Intensity Interval Training (HIIT) describes any workout that alternates between intense bursts of activity and fixed periods of less-intense activity or even complete rest. For example, a good starter workout is running as fast as you can for 1 minute and then walking or slow jog for 2 minutes. Repeat that 3-minute interval five times for a 15-minute, fat-blasting workout. It sounds too simple to be effective, but science does not stretch the truth. HIIT is super efficient which makes it the ideal workout for a busy woman wanting to squeeze in a workout during lunch or get in shape for a fast-approaching event. Research shows you can achieve more progress in a mere 15 minutes of interval training done three times a week than the jogging on a treadmill for an hour. That is a huge time saver! Studies done by the American College of Sports Medicine show that 2 weeks of high-intensity intervals improves aerobic capacity by as much as endurance training for 6 to 8 weeks. Not only are you saving time, but you are burning more calories and fat during a HIIT workout. Even more exciting, the effect of all that intense exertion kicks your body’s repair cycle into hyper-drive which means you burn more fat and calories in the 24 hours after a HIIT workout than you do after a steady-pace run. Who-hooo! However, keep in mind that although all the HIIT workouts are beneficial, it is extremely important for women over the age of 40 to include weight training in their workout regimen because steady cardio seems to encourage muscle loss. HIIT also stimulates production of your human growth hormone (HGH) by up to 450 percent during the 24 hours after you finish your workout. This is great news since HGH is not only responsible for increased caloric burn but also slows down the aging process, making you younger both inside and out. Be prepared to work harder than you probably are accustomed to and forget about reading a magazine or chatting with a friend during the workout. Because it is so short and intense, you will be working hard the whole time. Most people are not used to the intensity as you will be pushing yourself into the anaerobic zone (That lovely place where you cannot breathe, you feel your heart pounding out of your chest, and nausea sets in). Stay focused as extreme training produces extreme results. One 2006 study found that after 8 weeks of doing HIIT workouts, subjects could bicycle twice as long as they could before the study, while maintaining the same pace.
10 | October • November 2013
Running, biking, jump roping, and rowing all work great for HIIT, but you do not need any equipment. High knees, fast feet, or anything ply-metric like jumping lunges work just as well to get your heart rate up fast. The trade-off is this format of exercise offers seasoned exercisers a new challenge and new exercisers a quick way to see results. You may be in pain, you may be sucking wind, but you definitely will not be bored! Source: Acefitness.com, Mayoclinic.com, Medicine.net
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At the Gym:
Go Big or Go Boutique by Becca Tebon
ith so many choices, not only in types of classes but the type of atmosphere, it can become difficult in finding the perfect place to hang your towel. Not only that, women-only niche workouts can be very appealing as well. So what is a forty-something sassy women looking to shed a few pounds and meet her girl friends or new friends going to do? First, start by deciding on paper what your schedule for your workouts will be; three times a week or 5 times a week. Choose the time of day and be specific. Next, choose the type of workouts that you might like to delve into. There are so many new trends like Barre, Zumba, Tabata, or cycling. Consider what your body, mind and soul NEEDS! The boutique style gyms are perfect for women who love and need the structure, comrade, group training, and “family” atmosphere the smaller gyms offer. If you are among the women who enjoy or do not mind working out on their own, are self motivated, and can not commit to a specific class schedule, then the larger, more commercial gyms may be what you need. However, don’t rule out the occasional class at a boutique gym to break up your exercise routine. Changing it up every so often is a great way to prevent boredom and it will create muscle confusion by infusing various types of workouts. Are you the stressed-to-the-max type, hoarding cortisol, inflammation and tension? Will an invigorating workout at the end of the day let’s you pour out all of your frustrations? Or is a yoga stretch going to bring peace and tranquility to your core’s center, either first thing in the morning to get you started in the right direction or something to look forward to at the end of “one of those all about THEM” days? For me, I’ve ALWAYS preferred working out in the morning. No excuses. Get it in and done! I highly suggest you ask around to see which classes and instructors your friends follow. Not all classes, instructors, or music are the same. Check Groupon or similar type savings websites for specials at these “gyms” and give them ALL a try. You just might find the perfect fit for you! Becca Tebon is a certified personal and group instructor, wellness speaker specializing in executive women and passionate about supporting kid’s health & fitness. As an author, she is releasing her next book in early 2014. You can find her at parks and the beaches from Deerfield to Delray Beach. W.O.W. [women-only-workouts.com] has branched out of F.I.T., which is a WHOLE-istic approach to what she calls the “F-Bomb” System: Faith, Focus on self, Family, Friends, Food, Fitness, Financial Freedom and of course, FUN! Find Becca at www.BeccaTebon.com or call 318-232-2218
Fabulous40rties.com | 11
Thanksgiving Donut Hole Pops This delicious recipe brought to you by Cheeky Kitchen Ingredients: FOR ALL THE DONUT POPS: 1 box plain donut holes 1 package of Candiquik chocolate flavored candy melt 15-20 long, thin wooden popsicle sticks ALSO NEEDED FOR BASIC DONUT POPS: 1/5 cup chocolate sprinkles ALSO NEEDED FOR THE TURKEY DONUT POPS: 2 tablespoons mini white chocolate chips 1 tablespoon blue or green flat, circular sprinkles 15-20 candy corns 15-20 red Jelly Belly jellybeans or red licorice candies ALSO NEEDED FOR THE ACORN POPS: 5 pretzel sticks, broken into half-inch pieces 1/4 cup chopped nuts Directions: FOR BASIC DONUT POPS: For basic chocolate covered donut pops melt the Candiquik according to package directions. Carefully press a wooden popsicle stick into the center of a donut hole, and then roll it around gently until covered with chocolate coating. Allow any excess chocolate to drip off of the donut pop. Decorate immediately using any of the three techniques below. TO MAKE THE BASIC POPS: 2 tablespoons chocolate sprinkles follow the basic directions, coating the donut holes one at a time, and decorating them immediately, before the chocolate hardens. To decorate: a) Sprinkle lightly with chocolate sprinkles. b) Stick donut pops into a block of Styrofoam and allow time to cool & hardened. TO MAKE THE TURKEY DONUT POPS: Follow the basic directions, coating the donut holes one at a time, and decorating them immediately, before the chocolate hardens. To decorate: a) press one candy corn into the center of the donut hole to make a ‘beak,’ b) gently place two mini white chocolate chips tip-side down for the eyes. c) Dip the tip of a jellybean into the melted chocolate coating, then press it gently into place below the candy corns. Stick donut pop into a block of Styrofoam until hardened. d) Once hardened, melt a tablespoon of white chocolate chips in a Ziploc bag, snip off a very tiny part of the corner, and pipe a bit of melted chocolate onto the ‘eyes’ then quickly press a sprinkle atop to make the colored part of the eye. Allow chocolate to harden before serving. TO MAKE THE ACORN POPS: Follow the basic directions, coating the donut holes one at a time, and decorating them immediately, before the chocolate hardens. To decorate: a) press a wooden popsicle stick into the center of the donut holes. b) Dip only the top half of each donut, immediately coating them with chopped nuts and pressing a pretzel stick into the stop part of the donut. c) Stand donut pops upright on a piece of Styrofoam. Allow chocolate coating to harden before serving.
12 | October • November 2013
What Are You Thankful For?
e are all busy and running in different directions to activities, doing homework, and play dates each day, but have you stopped to ask your children what they are thankful for? It might surprise you! Here are a few responses we received after asking school aged children… “Mom - because she keeps me safe. And I’m thankful for God.” ~ Charley S., 3 years old “I’m thankful for my family, good health, good food, and my Dad because he is the most special person in the world.” ~ Logan S., 7 years old “I am thankful for a house, food and football.” ~ Nick W., 10 years old “I am thankful for my family and friends and the necessities of good health, wealth, food, and shelter. I am thankful for the opportunities that await me in my future. I plan to go where there is no path and blaze my own trail.” ~ Harrison C., 14 years old “I’m grateful to have a mom that supports me in anything I do; she always believes in me and is my biggest fan.” ~ Susie R., 17 years old
hat’s worse than a child displaying bad sportsmanship on the field? A parent doing so! Oh the stories. There is the father who incessantly calls for his son to slam number 15 on the soccer field, to the point where the son can hardly concentrate on his game. How about the gymnastics mom who hammers down her foot each time her daughter’s rival beats her in the scoring? Or the pageant mom who attacks the judges for their decision? Parents, your children are watching. Your sportsmanship shapes their sportsmanship, or lack thereof.
Parent Sports Etiquette Rules: •
• • • • •
The 7th Annual Jenna McCann Memorial Golf Tournament To Benefit The Kids Cancer Foundation
Saturday, November 23rd, 2013 8:30am Shotgun 2001 Crestwood Blvd., North West Palm Beach, FL. 33411 561.784.5225 toll free: 1.866.492.1825
by Sherry Thomas Palm Beach Etiquette
• • •
Refrain from playing coach. The coach calls the plays, not you. You will confuse your athlete and place him into a difficult position of having to choose which commands to follow. Cheer on your kid by saying things like “Good job”, “Great play” not, “How could you miss that?” or “What are you thinking?” Refrain from negatives about another teammate or member of the opposing team. Children emulate what they see and hear. Cheer on other team members. Your child isn’t the only one playing her heart out. Verbally acknowledge a good play by a member of the opposing team and verbalize this to his/her parent sitting nearby. Screaming that everything is the ref ’s fault or the umpire’s fault is only teaching kids how to pass the buck. It isn’t always “someone else’s” fault. Bad plays happen but the parent who incessantly blames others is probably the one who has a problem, not the referees. Do not boo! Booing is bad sports conduct. Never, ever boo anyone on the field. Never, ever issue a directive that encourages bodily harm to another child, or to anyone, for that matter, such as the father above. Anger is not a pretty emotion to share during a disappointing loss. Accept it. Teach your child how to be a graceful loser.
Parents, keep your emotions in check. If you can’t, then perhaps sports events just aren’t for you!
For Tournament Information Contact: Sandy Erb 561.801.3420 or firstname.lastname@example.org Fabulous40rties.com | 13
More than a Makeover
acqueline came to us with her natural dark brown hair with some grey. She never had permanent color applied to her hair before so she was excited for the change. I decided to use Goldwell’s hair color to give her an auburn brown color to compliment her beautiful skin tone. Jacqueline’s hair needed to be shaped up so I gave her a clean, modern graduated cut with a soft fringe around her face. Before blowing her hair dry, I applied Moroccan Oil’s Hydrating Lotion and the Light Oil for a sleek and polished look and finished off with the Medium Hold Finishing Spray. Teri Warrington Stylist Master Colorist/Hair Designer Edmund James Salon & Spa
by Edmund James Salon & Spa photos by Stephi’s Fotografia
my came in with medium length fine natural brown hair pulled back in a bun. I decided I wanted to enhance her natural color with a clear glaze, while giving her some quick and easy styling techniques to achieve a sexy tousled look at home. I started by shampooing her, and then put Colorance Clear Glaze by Goldwell on her hair for impeccable shine, Finishing with Goldwell’s Ultra Volume Conditioner. To create the style we were looking for I used KMS Volumizing spray on the roots and mousse mid-length to ends. After drying I used a 2-inch barrel iron in 3-inch wide sections to create a tighter curl in order for it to hold. After curling I sprayed Anti-Humidity Spray by KMS and ran my fingers through her hair to soften her curls. When Amy left she couldn’t have looked more glamorous! Rebecca Solender Master Stylist/Colorist Edmund James Salon & Spa
yebrows are the frame to the face, when perfecting the color and shape it instantly perks up your everyday look. I started Amy and Jacqueline by shaping their brows creating more of an arch with each. With Amy’s fair skin and light brows I chose to use dark brown with a hint of red tint to warm up her features. Jacqueline’s eyebrows were very fine which blended into her skin; On Jacqueline I used Black vegetable dye. After perfecting their brows I tinted both of their lashes with Blue Black vegetable dye, which enhanced their lashes with out any makeup! Brow tinting is a great way of getting lush looking eyebrows that will accentuate all your other facial features Armineh Gharakhani Esthetician/Brow Specialist Edmund James Salon & Spa
14 | October • November 2013
atherine MacDonald, President/Founder of Luka Cosmetics did both Jackie and Amy’s make-up using Luka Cosmetics products. She used soft brown and berry shades on Amy’s eyes to make them stand out and a smudged eyeliner on the top and bottom lid to define her beautiful bright eyes. She filled in her brows with Brow Wax in Ginger for an elegant but bold effect, then finished her eyes with a couple of coats of Organic Black mascara. She evened out her skin with a velvety Cream to Powder Foundation, then finished the look off with a soft pink blush and a pink lipstick. To achieve Jackie’s look, Katherine focused on emphasizing her beautiful eyes and lips with fresh Fall Luka colors. She used Tangerine and bronze tones on her eyes, filled her brows in with Cocoa brow wax and defined her eyelids with a Black marker eyeliner. She used Nymph lipstick which is a shimmery wine to make her gorgeous pout stand out. Katherine’s makeup line and services are now available at the Edmund James Salon & Spa.
N N N N
ail Specialist Dana Drolet decided to do a classic French manicure on Amy. She wanted a regular manicure and Dana decided with her short nails that the French would elongate the nails and look very clean and stylish. Amy relaxed with a Spa Pedicure that included a OPI Lemon masque for hydrating and OPI lemon scrub to exfoliate. She loved the massage most of all. Amy chose OPI FIGI for her toes. A great color that looks fabulous on everyone!
ail Specialist Karol Cummins recommended a CND Shellac Manicure in the color Hollywood for Jacqueline’s nails. Perfect for the busy woman, lasts 2 weeks “No Chipping”. Jacqueline decided on a OPI Vanilla Scrub & Masque, along with OPI Vanilla Lotion for her leg massage. The best way to end a great day! Manicure and Pedicure services are available at Edmund James Salon & Spa.
Edmund James Salon & Spa 12020 South Shore Blvd, Suite 300 Wellington, FL 33414
Located in the heart of Wellington at the former Capricious location (next to C.R. Chicks & Lutina’s)
Fabulous40rties.com | 15
he first line of natural and organic based skin care specifically formulated for girls, takes tweens back to school feeling confident in their own skin.
Beauty isn’t skin deep, but for girls between the crucial growth ages of 9 and 14 it often seems like that’s the case when skin trouble strikes. Sebum production starts between the ages of 9 and 10 and girls today need facial products at an earlier age than when we began to use them. The key to healthy skin during adolescence is prevention before issues begin. Good For You Girls is a natural and organic skincare line consisting of head to toe products that naturally address the special needs of young skin. Pampering formulas are filled with plant based, skin loving ingredients like chamomile, aloe, calendula, borage, flax and rose hip oils, white, green and black tea and vitamins that nourish and protect. Adding to the goodness, the Good For You Girls line of products are Gluten Free, Vegan, made in the USA and never tested on animals. Products are free from parabens, petrochemicals, sulfates, phthalates, benzyl alcohol, PEG’s, synthetic fragrance and dyes. The company also makes an environmental commitment using waterbased inks for packaging and recyclable PET bottles.
For more information about these products, their ingredients, and prices, visit www.goodforyougirls.com Products can be purchased online or the finest natural product stores and local drug stores.
hether you want to recreate the perfect brow shape at home or maintain the general upkeep of your brows, these stencils are the must-have for your beauty arsenal. Crafted of pliable plastic, these stencils are durable, easy to use, and easy to clean.
What it does:
Petite, Slim High, Medium, High and Full Arch Stencils allow you to achieve and maintain a true shape at home. Shape brows using Tweezers and fill in brows with the Mini Brush and Brow Powder, all while using the Stencils as a foolproof guide.
What else you need to know:
This one-of-a-kind set of stencils are available in five shapes to suit any face shape: Petite Arch Slim High Arch Medium Arch High Arch Full Arch
Anastasia Beverly Hills Classic Stencils can be found at Sephora for $20.00. Similar products can be purchased at your local department or drug stores.
rom bold, bright neons to mini-masterpieces on your fingertips, nail art is a colorful form of self- expression. Revlon Nail Art offers an easy way to capture this trend at home with dual-ended packaging that contains everything you need to create the hottest designs from the runways. With 30 shades spanning three different styles, the possibilities are endless. The Revlon Nail Art collection offers you three different styles; Expressionist, Moon Candy, and Neon with which to mix, match and paint. You can create a Pinkasso, wow with Laser Beam or sparkle with Cosmic! Express yourself with your fingertips using Revlon Nail Art.
16 | October • November 2013
Beauty Tips for Teens
o matter what age the special young woman in your life is, offering a few simple skin care and makeup suggestions could carry them through to the next phase in their life. It is never too early to start a skin care regimen, especially living in South Florida and always being exposed to the Suns’ rays. Here a few helpful hints provided by age groups:
Ages 10 to 13
This is a good time to introduce moisturizer, sunscreen and a clear gloss or tinted lip balm (think Burt’s Bees).
Ages 14 to 18
Even though teenage girls have a tendency to want to try to look older during this time, a lash defining mascara, BB cream or tinted moisturizer with sunscreen, thin eyeliner at lash line, a kiss of bronzer, and sheer pinky brown lip gloss is all that is needed to enhance their natural beauty.
What’s Your Tone?
re you warm toned or cool toned? Do you have yellowbased skin or pink-based skin? Should you be grabbing a blue-red or an orange-red? Finding the right makeup shades can be tricky, but luckily there are some colors that are universally flattering, regardless of complexion or undertone.
Taupe works on everyone from the palest skin tone with blonde hair to the darkest skin and hair color. The color, which is a mixture of brown and grey, is neutral enough to complement all eye and skin colors. For the best results, shade your lids with a taupe shadow (or a shimmery taupe for evening) and then defining the eye with a dark brown liner.
The color that is most versatile is coral. Coral contains neither red nor yellow undertones so it contrasts with most skin tones to create a brightening effect. Use a light touch with pale skins and a heavier hand to create more of a flush for darker skinned gals.
Ages 19 to 21
Continue on with a great skincare and sun protection routine along with changing to a powder foundation, add concealer, a warm pink or cool peach blush, volumizing mascara, lip stain (Clinique Chubby Sticks), and a taupe shadow can create a quick yet fresh makeup routine.
Ages 22 to 25
Job hunting and graduate school call for stepping up the sophistication factor, yet still keeping it simple. You can’t go wrong with a well groomed brow, liquid foundation with SPF and medium coverage, concealer with SPF, eye base, dark brown or grey liquid liner slightly lifted at the outer eye, lengthening/thickening mascara, highlight on top of cheek bone and a sheer berry lip to finish off the sophisticated look.
Look for a transparent lip color that contains a hint of rose or berry to enhance your natural lip shade, effectively creating a better version of your own lips. Finding a sheer color is key as it allows the product to adjust to each individual. You can also choose a light glossy finish because it is universally flattering regardless of skin tone.
• • • •
How long before cosmetics go bad?
Nail polish should be tossed after 1 year. Every time you open the bottle to paint your nails, you allow air to enter the bottle causing the polish to get thick and gooey. Mascara should be tossed after 3 months as it becomes a breeding ground for bacteria which can casue eye infections. Face creams should be tossed after 1 year if it is a pump, 6 to 9 months if you apply with your fingers. Your fingers can introduce bacteria to the cream which can lead to skin infections. Perfume should be tossed after 2 years. Each spritz allows air to enter into the bottle which causes oxidation, slightly changing the scent. Fabulous40rties.com | 17
alt and pepper, silver, pewter, charcoal. Whatever you call it, at some stage in our lives, both men and women will experience the on set of gray hair. But why do some people go gray in their 20s while others don’t see the first sign of silver until age 50?
HAVE YOU TRIED THAT CRAZY WRAP THING? •customizable body wraps •tightens, tones & firms the skin where applied •made with all natural active ingredients •part-time reps needed
Going gray, by itself, does not mean you have a medical problem, except in rare cases. Contrary to popular belief, stress has not been shown to cause gray hair. Scientists don’t know exactly why some people go gray early, but genes play a large role.
If your mom or dad started going gray at a young age then the chances are you may also suffer from premature gray hair. This is not always the case. Age does play a large part in the graying process. The pigment in the hair shaft is generated from cells at the base of the root of the hair and as we get older these cells start producing less pigment until there is no pigment at all in the hair and we end up with the transparent hair. Harvard scientists proposed that a failure of melanocyte stem cells (MSC) to maintain the production of melanocytes could cause the graying of hair.
Hiding the Gray There are lots of choices for concealing gray, they include: • • • •
Semi-permanent or demi-permanent color: The color lasts a few weeks and is a good option for people just starting to see gray. Highlights: Scattered strands are lightened to blend the gray with the rest of your hair. Permanent color: Suggested to use once you have 45% to 50% gray. Hair products: If you don’t want to dye but still want to conceal the gray, try a coloring tool such as spray-on airbrush hair makeup, which washes out with a shampoo.
Gray Hair Facts • • • •
18 | October • November 2013
Pluck one gray hair and two more will grow back - completely false. Gray hair can be harder to color, as it is more resistant to hair color or hair dye due to a decreased amount of melanin. Smokers are 4 times more likely to have gray hair than nonsmokers and smoking has been conclusively linked to accelerated hair loss. In some cases, gray hair may be caused by a deficiency of B12 or a thyroid imbalance.
What is True Beauty?
here are a thousand definitions of beauty. And there are many degrees of each. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
Males are visual creatures. In their minds’ eye, like the posters teenage boys hang on their bedroom walls, men have an inflated idea of beauty. But to see how he really finds beauty in his surroundings, look at the girl with whom he spends time and feels most comfortable. She is often the opposite of the bedroom poster. She is the one he enjoys being with most. To be able to laugh with someone, we must drop our guards. Beauty is to be free and to act naturally. Today, messages and information are aimed at us in very new ways. Life is demanding more than we can give and we instinctively try to hang on for dear life. In turn, you rely on text messages rather than physical conversation. The heart is missing in our lives and you must bring it back! Beauty has always been costly. By the time you have been plucked, pinched and enhanced, you can easily spend a fortune on the latest product or the most popular procedure. In the race to erase a wrinkle, we try to stop time and the slow and inevitable progress of nature. It is a fight no one can win. To choose beauty, determines that you have pondered the question, objectified the issues and made a choice.
“What will I project today? What will I put out into the world?” Then you choose and follow it through. Embracing victimhood is a way to lick your past wounds but it never yields any positive future-oriented gains. You lead by example. Choose beauty. Look at a flower as you would look upon a work of art. Appreciate it. Enjoy it, and just let it all in. Now, look at yourself the same way. You are a perfect and unique creation of nature, just like a flower. This may be hard to do through all of the negativity and voices in your head. They are merely the echoes of insecurity and comic relief. Beauty cannot be beaten into you. Beauty must be invited and it must flow. Silence is the key that unlocks the mystery. A quiet meditation. Say a prayer. Sit down and have a little chat with yourself. Open this door and you will be answered with your own beauty. Do something that makes you happy. Let go and take the time for yourself. Call a friend. Go to a movie. Get a massage. You do not need to spend a hundred dollars. Shop, but don’t buy anything. Bake a cake. Do something that is purposed for you. When this happens, your beauty will begin to show. Others will recognize it and be drawn to it. You have allowed your beauty to flow. Fabulous40rties.com | 19
ElysaSuzanne couture clothing Fit 40 in an overhead suitcase...with 2 pair of shoes.
hopping is fun and easy at our Palm Beach Gardens showroom. You can choose from over 65 styles of dresses, tops, pants, halters and more with over 100 different fabrics. Two weeks later...Violà! Your very own ElysaSuzanne. Whether you are looking for casual every day wear or a gown for a black tie affair, we have just the style you need.
Beauty, Style, Comfort • • • •
Great for travel Fit over 40 in an overhead suitcase No dry cleaning or ironing Sizes XXXS to XL
• • • •
Customize for your body type Over 65 different styles Over 100 different fabrics Made locally in southern Florida
Private appointments only. Call 561-818-5401 to schedule.
20 | October • November Visit 2013us online: www.ElysaSuzanne.com Find us on Facebook: ElysaSuzanne Couture
photos by Lauren McGarry Photography
A-line Golf Skirt 18”in length To be the next trendsetter in your town, contact Mary to obtain your very own Mary Carroll skirt today. We look forward to hearing from you so that we may work together in getting a Mary Carroll skirt into your wardrobe. Contact me at email@example.com or visit us at www.shopmarycarroll.com. Velvet Hip Hugger Skirt16” in length
Find us on Facebook.
A-line Leather Mini Skirt 15” in length
A-line Classic Skirt 18” in length
Fabulous40rties.com | 21
Gratitude (from a psychic medium’s perspective)
by Rochelle Sydney
hen I was a little girl and saw people in unusual clothing in my bedroom I didn’t know what was going on; I just knew that it was different. I was different. When my parents would put me to bed, I would run downstairs screaming about those people. My parents would put me back to bed. This continued until one night my mother left the lights on in the hall and my bedroom. It helped somewhat, since before then, I would put the covers over my head, thinking that doing this would keep them away. I didn’t know that seeing them was considered a “gift.” Gratitude? Didn’t have much time for that; I was too busy crying. Our home was built before the Revolutionary War. Washington’s men had slept there! No wonder all of this was going on. My parents had a coffee table with cherubs on each leg. One day my parents asked me what I was doing on my knees praying to them. I just knew that was what I was supposed to do. I didn’t know why because I was only 4 and had never seen anyone pray. I would have my friends come in and ask them to pray with me. I was praying and getting answers. They were not. Yes, I was different. Eventually I learned to shut it down. Years later, I became grateful for this gift, because I knew that it was not given out haphazardly. So, I began my journey of understanding and the feeling of joyfulness that helping people communicate with loved ones, who have passed away, provides. I meditate once or twice a day, always with infinite love and gratitude for what I have.
An Open Opportunity
by Dr. Shelley Plumb
ur days can often feel like whirlwinds; Morning rituals whip plans into action, often concluding with microbursts of activity at home. 5:00pm draws near: A time lovingly referred to in our house as “The Perfect Storm.” It’s that time of the day when the flurry of drama, wants, and needs converge into one well-formed tempest of activity.
A Day Like Any Other
Today the cyclone rages: Children need assistance with homework, a hungry family needs feeding, and the telephone consistently rings with work unfinished for the day. My gaze pauses momentarily on my daughter. Normally upbeat and smiling, she gazes at the floor sullen, tense, and withdrawn. As her arms tighten around my waist, I hear her whisper quietly. It is my best intention to listen, but over what? The children laughing? The dogs barking? The television blaring? Seeing me irritated and distracted, she stomps off, upset. I follow her upstairs to her bedroom door surprised to have it slam inches from my face.
A Closed Door
Stunned I stare at a sign hanging haphazardly in front of me with bright green ink that says “STAY OUT!” I take a few steps back absorbing the silence on both sides of the door. At first glance the closed door conveys defiance. Looking further, I notice a smaller sign under the first. It says, “No brothers!” “No brother’s friends!” “Mom’s okay.” Wow…Mom’s okay….
An Open Opportunity
The light goes on…This is not a door, not a symbol of rejection or defiance. It is a voice….my daughter’s voice and it is saying... “I am frustrated...” “I am hurting....” “I need my MOM.” Now I see it clearly. Staring at the door is futile, but recognizing its meaning is fruitful. It is an open opportunity. This is my opportunity to extend myself to her. A chance to show her that I care, that I love her, and that I will listen.
What about you? Do you stop, during the day, and think about all the things you are grateful for, or are you thinking about the things you don’t have? Please be grateful. The Universe hears and wants to help you. Watch or listen to Rochelle on weinetwork.com, Wednesdays, 7PM Reach Rochelle at 561-281-3359 or rochellesydney.com 22 | October • November 2013
With confidence born of fresh understanding and love, I reach out and knock on the door. Instantly the door handle turns and my baby is in front of me, tear stained face smiling. Grasping her hand we return to the cyclone below to find that it has transitioned to a calm wave of activity. Sometimes the doors that open in life are the ones that simply surprise you. Dr. Shelley Plumb Motivational Speaker and Life Coach www.plumbtalkwomen.com firstname.lastname@example.org
The Second Time Around by Lisa Goodman
hen we are young and in love, many people provide constant advice. Take your time, play the field, make sure he is the ‘one’ – yet there is not a foolproof formula. When it comes to love the second time around, we asked our readers what they are looking for, how they are handling the situation, and as usual, we received plenty of feedback! The common theme in many responses was falling in love at a young age is difficult and immature. Love is not about the materialistic things but more emotional and psychological sharing. Many realized too late that they did not know themselves well and therefore, had a difficult time staying the person their spouse fell in love with. “The second time, I was more mature, older and wiser as to what I wanted and what a relationship needs to work. Together for 17 years, I finally realized that love is about having a partner in your life that wants the same things. Most importantly, love now means wanting to always be with that person and be there for that person. We are best friends and we are in love with each other.” As most of us seek to find that one true love, those searching for love a second time pay more attention to the red flags in a relationship. They realize what is enjoyable and tolerable for both themselves and as a couple.
“For me, I was looking for someone who was in the same boat! Our lives are great, but how do we make them better together? Blending families can be difficult and communication and similar values are ideal to making it work.” Now that we are older, there is no rush to finding a spouse. The biological clock is usually not an issue which leaves the opportunity to see how the person acts as a parent, son, brother, and friend. Time to get to know each other, share yourself and your interests, and really discover that connection make the second time around more often a good fit.
If only we had a crystal ball when we were young and could peek into the future. Or go the other way and see how different we were back then. We humans change, grow and develop with every year. Some people earlier, some people later in life. By now, we most likely know who we are and what we want. As we change, our needs change and our love changes.
Important lessons that resonate throughout the responses include taking the time out of your busy schedule to be together, mutual respect, not taking your partner for granted, and never turn down lovemaking. “Make your partner feel desired both emotionally and sexually at all times. Stop what you are doing and listen. Keep the physical in the relationship and keep it playful. The best relationships are those full of love and fun!”
“When you are 20 something, you are looking for a special someone with which to build a life. You look for good looks, a decent job, even someone with a means or interest in owning a home and having children. The idea of marriage is romanticized so much that it makes for a difficult journey when reality sets in.”
“The second time around has been a blessing to me, my daughter, husband and stepchildren. We all live together. There is more to love, argue about and share. There is a feeling of stability and togetherness. It takes some getting used to but we hope to continue to grow as a family and a couple.”
The second time around, you are looking for someone to share your life. You have developed interests, hobbies, routines, and when someone special fits nicely into your lifestyle, it becomes easy to imagine sharing your lives.
For many readers, the second time is more of a chance to find the love that fits much better. It is an opportunity to be yourself, know who you are, and find what truly makes you happy. We look forward to hearing more success stories of finding love the second time around! Fabulous40rties.com | 23
was 46. There is no possibility of early detection without consistent mammograms and self-exams. You owe that much to yourself and your families.
I saw a brochure in my doctor’s office for breast cancer awareness month and realized that it had been several years since my last mammography. I feel so fortunate for my primary care physician’s tenacity in getting me to follow up on an abnormal mammography. Having dense breasts, I ignored his first warning to schedule further testing. I did however, after the fourth message, follow up with a sonogram. The sonogram also resulted in an abnormal reading. The next step was a core biopsy. No cancer, but abnormal results. Next was a partial mastectomy. We discovered from the pathology results that the core biopsy produced a false negative result. It was at that point that I was diagnosed with Stage 0 breast cancer. The cancer was contained in my ducts so the only safe way to treat it was a mastectomy. For both medical and cosmetic reasons we decided on a double mastectomy. It’s fortunate that we did as my left breast had pre cancerous cells as well. As my cancer was contained in my ducts, the surgery eliminated the need for chemotherapy and radiation.
Inspiring Women The next few weeks were very hectic and overwhelming, I surfed the web and read all the data, (www.SusanGKomen.org) I could on the disease, treatments, drug and hormone therapy, what to expect. I also sought consel from other breast cancer survivors. Being the action-oriented woman that I am, I created a “cheat sheet” of all of my questions and scheduled an appointment with Dr. Santa Claus. He answered my questions, one-byone after hours in his office. He had the patience of a Saint! (Maybe St. Nick?) Every person and most literature stated that a positive attitude, changing your diet and group support was imperative. I began to add affirmations to my daily yoga practice: “I am healthy, cancer-free, I’m surrounded by love and health, I am a warrior.” My nutritionist removed gluten and sugar from my diet. I invested in a Juicer. I began a weekly regiment of acupuncture. My course of treatment was a lumpectomy. The pathology came back with “good” news; the cancer was isolated in the breast and had not spread into my lymph nodes. Further testing, following BRCA and ONCO, revealed that I was not a high risk for recurrence. Radiation and hormonal treatment would be sufficient.
There were a few more procedures after my expansion process, but I will not bore you with that. Most importantly I am a survivor. I’m healthy and happy to be surrounded by my lovely daughter, family and friends that God blessed me with. I remind everyone to be diligent. If you haven’t had your annual mammogram, make the appointment.
In this journey I have learned a whole lot about myself, my inner core, who I am. My support group was absolutely amazing! My employer gave me the time I needed to research, heal and be treated. Friends were with me every step of the way. Last year I attended a local Breast Cancer Awareness Run/Walk event, I took in all of the Pink, the music, and the smiles. I looked up to the sparkling blue sky—“Yes, I am one of the lucky ones”. Rock On Sister!
For all you “forty something’s” early detection is key.
am one of the lucky ones. I was diagnosed with Stage One Breast Cancer on October 29, 2009—my Father’s 72nd Birthday. Following a routine mammogram (of which I had missed a year, so I was late), I received a registered letter from my hospital urging me to follow up immediately with an ultra sound and more diagnosis. I proceeded to get the additional tests done. My OB/GYN referred me to a breast surgeon “just to make sure”. I remember sitting in his office and looking at his face as he reviewed the ultra sound. He reminded me of Santa Claus: white hair and beard, a little round and was wearing a bow tie. “The tumor in question has an odd shape,” he said while looking at me with his big blue eyes full of compassion. “We will get you straightened out.” I felt like I could trust him. Following a biopsy, my cancer was confirmed. Stage One, approximately 1 ½ centimeters, resembling the size of a pea in my left breast. 24 | October • November 2013
y new journey in life began on April 8, 2013, at the age of 33 when I was diagnosed with ductal carcinoma, yes, breast cancer. It was hard to believe as I looked and felt great. One has to wonder, how do you handle this news, more so how do you deal with the “new life” of cancer? The first phase was shock and disbelief but as you come around and face the facts you start searching for answers. For me it was research and reading tons of books, magazines and Googling information. Now don’t be fooled there is so much out there that you need to be realistic and weed out the good from the mediocre. (Two sites I found useful were www.breastcancer.org and http://www.cancer.gov/cancertopics/types/breast). I learned that as women we need to be in tune with our bodies, we need to be aware of the signs and don’t always believe or be set on what doctors tell you. Get several opinions and make your choice based on who you feel will provide you the care that you deserve. Prevention is the most important thing,
if I would have a do over, I would pay much more attention to the foods I eat. It is amazing how contaminated meats are and how important we choose natural organic food, not processed foods that we can’t even read the words on the labels. (Documentaries I recommend you see- Forks over Knives & The Beautiful Truth) Also, vitamins and juicing have become part of my daily routine and lifestyle. I have seen an improvement not only in my energy, skin, but my doctors were impressed with my blood work throughout my chemo treatment and speedy recovery. Seeking out friends and people who have gone through breast cancer was another huge help for me. In my case a close Bosom buddy, (Your Bosom Buddies II is a non-profit support group in Wellington that helps those emotionally and financially through the effects of breast cancer) was an enormous source of information as well as providing laughter, support and a listening ear something I will always be grateful for. Surround yourself by the people you love, don’t be afraid to express your feelings, their will be a lot of emotions going around. I was able to see each day with a new perspective. I was able to feel more, love more, laugh and cry but most of all enjoy and cherish every moment with those I love. My husband has been a strong rock for me and has been my partner to guide me through this journey. As a mother of a beautiful 8 year old boy, it hasn’t been easy, but answering the questions he asks truthfully and to a capacity that he understands has helped satisfy his curiosity of what is going on. He too has been a helpful, caring and loving little man through these harsh times. But most of all what helped me is the close relationship I have built over the years with God, who has given me the strength to realize I will come out stronger and I WILL survive…I will beat this.
cancer. I also found out that Ashkenazi Jews, of which I am one, have a 1 in 40 chance of having a BRCA 1 or 2 mutation. I was tested and discovered that I had the BRCA 1 mutation. This meant that I had been living with an 87 percent risk of breast cancer and a 50 percent risk of ovarian cancer. I also had a 50 percent risk of getting cancer in my other breast. I decided to have a bilateral mastectomy. Now the breast cancer wasn’t just about me. My mother and sister had to be tested for the BRCA mutation. Surprisingly, my mother tested negative, but my sister tested positive. That meant that we inherited the mutation from our father. Then other family members had to be tested. So far, only my aunt, my father’s sister, has also tested positive. My sister and aunt both took prophylactic measures to greatly reduce their risks. After my mastectomy, I had chemotherapy, then 2 more surgeries. It was a rough time for our whole family. The support from family and friends helped us make it through such a difficult time. Today I am 5 years completely cancer free! The thought that my children have a 50 percent chance of inheriting the BRCA mutation is so scary. Luckily, they can learn their genetic status and take control of their own destinies! FORCE - Facing Our Risk of Cancer Empowered-states that “Knowledge is Power”! I truly believe this. I became involved with FORCE because I wanted to spread awareness and support others affected by Hereditary Breast and Ovarian Cancer. I am now a South Florida Outreach Coordinator for FORCE.
This upcoming month of October I will share my voice by advocating and raising funds for Your Bosom Buddies II. For more information feel free to email me at email@example.com
n June of 2008, at 44 years of age, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I was shocked! I had done all the things recommended to keep myself healthy, including eating a mostly plant based diet, breast feeding for 4 years of my life, exercising regularly, not smoking or using drugs, and drinking moderately. I also didn’t think I had a family history of breast cancer. How could this be happening to me? I quickly learned about the BRCA mutation, a genetic mutation that greatly increases a carrier’s risk of breast and ovarian
For more information about Hereditary Breast and Ovarian Cancer please visit www.facingourrisk.org. Fabulous40rties.com | 25
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Did You Know? The University of Minnesota found that regular family dinners lead to better literacy rates, less disordered eating, increased health through better nutrition and fewer risky behaviors in youth. Technology becoming more mobile has allowed it to infiltrate our dinner tables, making it easier for parents to check a quick email or teens to quickly update their Facebook status. It can wait...enjoy your families!
26 | October • November 2013
Healthier Drink Options
iving a healthy lifestyle can be tough especially during the holiday season. Temptation is always lurking right around the corner, whether it’s a coworker’s birthday cake, a company holiday potluck lunch, or the woman in the cubicle next to yours who always brings in homemade holiday cookies. Eating healthy in a country where a 16-ounce soda is considered a “medium” is a challenge, especially if the people around you aren’t as conscientious about their health as you are about yours. While it would be great if you could get all your friends to join you on your journey to living a healthier life, you certainly can’t shun them if they don’t. Of course, that means you might find yourself hanging out with people who consider beer and onion rings a food group, so the question becomes: How do you stay healthy when spending time at places (and with people) that aren’t?
Eat first. Drinking on an empty stomach is a terrible idea for a whole host of reasons. The biggest problem is one you’ve no doubt experienced: People tend to eat more when they drink. Solve this problem by eating a healthy meal or snack before happy hour. Don’t even look at the happy hour food menu, which is always loaded with fried foods, cheese dips, and hamburgers. If you can’t resist a bite with your drink, opt for hummus and sliced veggies or a salad with dressing on the side. Finally, remember to hydrate. Alternate each drink with a glass of water. It’ll keep you hydrated, stop you from drinking too much, and help head off a hangover before it starts.
Festive Holiday Table Setting •
Happy hour is one of the biggest obstacles for most people especially during the stressful holiday season. How do you go out and have fun while still eating or drinking healthy? I won’t sugarcoat it: Losing weight or even keeping it off means you’ll have to say goodbye to many of the fruity drinks and finger foods that once defined your Friday nights. But that doesn’t mean you have to swear off alcohol – or fun – entirely! Eating healthy is a lifestyle, not a life sentence. Read on for a few suggestions on how to make happy hour jive with your health and wellness goals.
Consider a spritzer. Eating healthy – and drinking healthy – requires a bit of creativity. Although they might bring to mind women with feathered hair and men with unfortunate mustaches, wine spritzers make a fantastic happy hour alternative to the wine you usually drink. While a little wine isn’t bad for you, too much can wreck your diet goals. Ask the bartender to mix half a glass of your favorite red wine (organic if possible) with soda water for a light, refreshing treat.
Choose a festive tablecloth or place mats to put on the table. Also, pick a centerpiece that reflects the season (fall leaves or pumpkins). Use a charger under the dinner plate for a more formal look. Plates should be 2 inches from the table’s edge and centered directly in front of each chair. Stack your salad plate and soup bowl on top of the dinner plate. The butter plate with butter knife goes above and to the left of the dinner plate. Place the forks to the left of the dinner plate. The knife and spoon go to the right. Place utensils in order of use, starting from the outside in. For example, the salad fork will be to the left of the dinner fork. Place knife blades so that the cutting edge is facing the plate. Position the water glass directly above the knife blade. Wine glasses go to the right of the water glass. Center the napkin on the plates, place it to the left of the forks or arrange it inside of one of the drinking glasses. Finish off your table with festive napkin rings, wine charms and name cards. Enjoy your family and friends!
Go for clear liquor. When possible, choose vodka, which is probably the “healthiest” of the hard liquors. If you can, consider drinking it on the rocks – the strong flavor will help you sip slower. If not, soda water or tonic are your healthiest options. The fewer ingredients the better. What’s true for eating healthy is also true for drinking healthy: The more ingredients in your drink, the worse it is for you. That means that Long Island Iced Teas are definitely off the menu! Know what you’re drinking. No matter how appealing a drink sounds, remember that to be healthy, you need to know exactly what you’re putting in your body. So unless you know all the ingredients in a Bay Breeze or Mai Tai, stay away.
Fabulous40rties.com | 27
CARING FOR THE COMMUNITY
A Mother’s Persistence by Marianne Malky
rowing up on the Jersey Shore, I loved spending time on the beach. Until one day, when I was 17, everything changed. I was walking to a friend’s house, when a car stopped and a man asked if I wanted a ride. I said “No” and kept on walking past the car. The man jumped out of the car and dragged me into it. He then drove me to a wooded area, dragged me into the woods to rape and kill me. All I was thinking about was how to get away. I looked up and saw car headlights coming down a dirt road. I jumped up from the ground, kicked the man as hard as I could, ran through the woods like a deer, and jumped in front of the car. A lady was driving, stopped, and drove me away. That day, I made up my mind to make changes in the world. I went on with my life, married a man from New York, and had a son. Eventually we divorced and I was given custody of my son, David Shipenberg. In 1974, another tragedy struck. I was lying in the hospital, when I received a phone call from my exhusband. He said, “I am taking your son and you will never see him again.” I got dressed and ran out of the hospital, but was too late – my son was gone. It took me 31 years of searching every day along with 16 private investigators to finally locate my son in 2005. While searching all those years, I started my war against abduction. In 1980, I produced my TV show “Voice for the Children, Inc.” The show displayed missing children including parentally-abducted children to the public. My first story in the newspaper was 1983 and continued every year until 2005. I aligned myself with political allies to change the legislation. With Senator Tom Gagliano, we were able to get legislation passed: New Jersey’s Missing Children Information Clearing House, 1985. I also partnered with Assemblywoman Marlene Lynch Ford to pass A2847, which provides stiffer penalties for parental abduction from the 4th degree to the 3rd degree. I was invited to the State Capital for the passing of the legislation. My story was featured on Unsolved Mysteries. I appeared on Geraldo Rivera, Court TV with Johnny Cochran, a radio show in California with John Rothman, and a radio show with Michael Reagan. I met John Walsh in 1985, when he told me to keep up the good work. In 1989, I moved to Florida. I continued to search for my son, but stopped searching for other children. But my friends from New Jersey would not let me quit and convinced me to continue. I formed a non-profit organization in 1990 called Voice for the Children, Inc. I created a mascot of sorts, a big robot named Robie the Safety Robot. Along with Robie, I wrote a script to teach children about abduction. 28 | October • November 2013
I also wrote scripts for films using the robot character to teach about stranger abduction, parental abduction, runaways and danger on the internet. We even entered one of the films into the Ashville Film Festival, where it brought great reviews. We also have an in-house private investigator who locates parentally-abducted children for parents who cannot afford resources to locate their children. Voice for the Children, Inc. goes into schools, to festivals, Chick-Fil-A’s and Burger Kings. We also visit classrooms where no one speaks English and the schools provide translators. Young and old love Robie, the robot. I love what I do, and do it with my heart. Although I located my son’s whereabouts in 2005 in Alexandria, Virginia, living under the name of David Sanders, I have never seen nor spoken to him. He refused all contact with me due to his father’s brain-washing over the years. Stephen Shipenberg, now also Stephen Sanders along with his wife Barbara, changed their names so that I could not locate him. I guess he forgot how persistent I am. If you would like to donate to help families with missing children, visit www.voiceforthechildren.org or send donations to Voice for the Children, Inc., 1522 North O St., Lake Worth, FL 33460.
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Kristin Hoke ~ Lost her fight June 9, 2010
Dodi Goldberg, 15 Year Survivor Left ~ Marni Zuckerman, 2 Year Survivor Right ~ Lisa Fessler, 5 Year Survivor
Honoring Brave Women Donna Palmisciano, 7 Year Survivor ~ In memory of my mom who lost her fight in 2010
Angela Sampieri, 2 Year Survivor
Mari Hoover-McGarry, 3 Year Survivor
Left to Right ~ GinaCavarretta, Melisa Rubin, Denise Chernoff (4 Years), Roz Pamatat, Josephine Downey (40 Years), and Rita Pamatat
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n business since 1996, Melody Acres Music has been providing music lessons, instrument repair, band rentals and more under the same ownership for over 6 years. Proud to be a part of the community, not only do the 2 locations average 350 students, but also employ 20 people in various roles. Melody Acres Music focuses its business philosophy around honesty. “We want people to feel there is still hope and they can trust others for music education,” says owner Carlos Angelino. “At the end of the day, this is a business with bills to pay and families to support. But we want our customers to know that we are willing to go above and beyond their expectations. Although we are not perfect, we won’t let them down.” With the additional store now open in Wellington, Melody Acres Music is determined to improve the music education options in that area. Angelino explains, “Similar businesses have left customers with a bitter taste in their mouths. We came to Wellington to change that. We know that a business can be successful while also being honest to its customers.” With students as young as 4 years old up to those in their 8th decade, the local shops serve the typical customer – families with school-aged kids. Students can enjoy lessons on a variety of instruments including piano, guitar and voice. Whether for school courses, personal interest or the groundwork for a career in the industry, Melody Acres will work with customers to provide what is necessary. They are proud to say that customers appreciate and understand the role of this type of business and support it. Melody Acres sets itself apart from other music schools with the quality teaching staff coupled with the high level of customer service. With the new location, Melody Acres is extremely convenient for Wellington residents as well as Royal Palm, Loxahatchee and the Acreage. “The western community can finally enjoy having an independent music store that offers lessons and treats customers with respect and courtesy,” Angelino says. “We really understand that without customers, there’s no business.” Carlos Angelino SouthEast Music Corp. dba Melody Acres Music “See our ad for coupons on page 14.”
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Fabulous40rties.com | 31
The Real Truth About Money - Part 2
by Arlene Paukert
Is the Student Loan Bubble About to Burst?
ow that the kids are back in school, it’s time to think about their future education. If you were to start a Florida pre-paid plan today – 4 years tuition only – the cost is over $53,000. College costs are certain to continue to rise in the future. How are you going to pay for their college tuition, textbooks, housing, and other miscellaneous expenses? We all want our children to be educated and have a prosperous, rewarding career. However, this is becoming more and more difficult.
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Not only are costs rising astronomically, but also there are now fewer and fewer sources for student loans. To make things worse, many financial institutions are getting out of the “student loan business.” According to a CNBC article, JPMorgan Chase will stop providing student loans beginning October 2013. The second big lender, US Bankcorp has already stopped providing student loans. Did you know there is over $1 trillion in outstanding student loans -- the second largest source of household debt after mortgages? Plus, college grads are having great difficulty in finding jobs they were educated to do. Student loans have to be repaid. If they default, it will have long-term effects on their credit and ability to get any job. Take heart -- There is a SOLUTION! “The Best Plan You Never Heard Of ”
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Ladies, it’s especially important for you to remember,”A Man Is Not a Plan!” Arlene Paukert is a Vice President with the Freedom Equity Group’s Freedom Force Financial Division located in West Palm Beach, Florida. For more information, or to meet with Arlene personally for a confidential financial check up, email arlene@ freedomforcefinancial.com or call 561-557-1324
32 | October • November 2013
tips to stay out of holiday debt
Holiday Spending by Pamela Yellen
lack Friday, Cyber Monday and holiday shopping are around the corner. Now is the time to get a game plan on how to avoid going into debt during the holidays. Savings expert and New York Times bestselling author Pamela Yellen can provide insight on how to beat binge spending and the credit card stress that follows. “It seems to happen every year that no matter what we budget, many of us get caught up in the holiday spirit and end up spending more money than we can really afford to,” explains Pamela.
5 Tips to Stay in the Black on Black Friday (and throughout the holidays) – plus one more value-add idea In an Associated Press interview, Pamela gave some insight into how to prepare for holiday gift giving without going into debt. In addition to the five tips below, she also asks in the article “Find it difficult to stick to a budget? Give gift cards and make something personal to go with them. Or give experiences instead of ‘stuff ’ — a shared hike or a special home-cooked meal. Or volunteer together at a soup kitchen, homeless shelter, or nursing home if your gift recipient doesn’t want more material items.” She also shares other tips to stay out of debt while capturing the holiday spirit: • Pay for Gifts with Cash: People paying with cash spend 20 percent less without feeling deprived, according to research by the National Foundation for Credit Counseling. • Ask Yourself Why: Ask yourself why you want to buy something – whether it’s for yourself or as a gift. You may realize that you’re being manipulated into it by advertisements. • The Gifts People Remember the Longest are Often Free: Think about what you might give that is free or low cost that would bring as much or more long-term pleasure. • Remind Yourself of Your Goals: This helps you realize that every time you don’t spend money, you’re closer to reaching your goals. • Use the 10/10/10 Savings Formula: Using the time-tested 10/10/10 Savings Formula year round puts you in control of your money and finances. Pamela shares how. Did You Know? The average holiday shopper spent $423.00 the weekend after Thanksgiving last year, with total holiday spending topping $59.1 billion, according to the National Retail Federation. About Pamela Yellen: As a consultant to financial advisors, Pamela Yellen investigated more than 450 savings and retirement planning strategies seeking an alternative to the risk and volatility of stocks and other investments. Her research led her to a time-tested, predictable method of growing and protecting savings now used by more than 500,000 Americans. Pamela’s book, BANK ON YOURSELF: The LifeChanging Secret to Growing and Protecting Your Financial Future, is a New York Times Bestseller. She has been featured on ABC, NBC, CBS, CNN, FOX, NPR and in The Huffington Post, Fortune Small Business and hundreds of other publications. Learn more at www.BankOnYourself.com.
FINANCE by Stuart Hack
y mother used to make an annual list of all the Holiday Cards that we sent out as well as received. It was handwritten on a piece of paper and went back over 30 years! Every year she would just attach the current year in front of the old ones. You could ask her if our neighbor in Apartment 3B sent us a card in 1968 and she would be able to look it up. As time has passed and technology advances the holiday season has become in the words of Avril Lavigne “Complicated”. First of all it starts much earlier. It almost seems that if you don’t complete all of your shopping by the end of Black Friday either there will be nothing left or you will have to pay a premium for that must have gift of the season. You could also go on the black market, which in our house is referred to as EBay. I also believe that the amount of people we buy holiday gifts for has also increased. Back when my mother had her handwritten lists there were no things such as Office Holiday Grab Bags. This has got me thinking (Always Dangerous!) With the popularity of Social Media Websites maybe I should get holiday gifts for all my Facebook friends and LinkedIn Connections. I have 330 Facebook Friends and 1,691 LinkedIn Connections. Luckily I am not yet on Twitter. That comes out to just over 2,000 gifts. Now there are some people who are part of both lists. Would I get those people something extra? Not sure how I would explain to my wife why she and our kids are getting less because they are not on LinkedIn. This just shows how spending has gotten out of hand despite us as a nation going through some economic downturn. I think instead of figuring on a Holiday Spending Budget we should take a long look at the meaning of Christmas, Chanukah and Kwanzaa. Lets be thankful for all the loved ones in our lives. I used to kid my mother about her lists. I said you would never catch me doing any handwritten holiday card lists. I am sure my mother is smiling from heaven knowing my holiday card lists are on an Excel Spreadsheet. Stuart A. Hack is the Managing Member of Hack Tax and Accounting Services LLC. If you want to be on his Holiday Card list for next year, he can be reached at 561-214-6171 or firstname.lastname@example.org
Fabulous40rties.com | 33
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