er one May 15 and 16, 2012. You can find them on the web at memoryadvocates.blogspot.com, or email, memoryadvocates@gmail.com. Wadeen maintains a relationship with her mother. She found a facility in the Brainerd lakes area where her mom feels safe and comfortable and she can visit her often. She prefers a smaller place where her mom can get one on one attention and have some outside stimulation, like art and music therapy, and interaction with other people. The staff has shorter shifts which reduces the stress for the patients. Beverly feels a full range of emotions. She senses when people are tense or frustrated, or happy and excited. She enjoys music and art and time on the lake. Watching someone you love get sick and slip away from you, physically and mentally, is very difficult, but you are not alone. There are support groups forming, people to talk to, and facilities set up for people when memory fades. What hasn’t faded, though, is your memory of that person. You have built a life together, a relationship. You are now the keeper of the memories. You can tell them their story, live in the moment with them, and bring back the music of their lives. People in a memory care unit need you to talk to them, to offer a gentle touch, to show them art and beauty, and to play their music. When I play piano at a local memory care unit, I see the residents come alive. Their eyes connect with mine and with each other. A woman pulls an afghan onto her legs and shares it with the woman next to her. I play songs that they might know from their past, and not only are they tapping their toes to the rhythm, but many of them hum and sing all the verses from memory. As the Gershwin brothers said, “They can’t take that away from me.”
HV
Mary Aalgaard
Beverly still enjoys fishing; last summer at a senior fishing outing on the Mississippi River.
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Mary is a freelance writer in the Brainerd area, where she lives with her four sons and cat Leo. She teaches piano lessons, works with kids and dramas, and writes plays. She manages two blogs. Her personal blog is www.maryaalgaard.blogspot.com, and the one for the LAMAA group, www.memoryadvocates.blogspot.com.
WINTER 2011 | her voice
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11/4/11 11:09 AM