Summer 2011

the

Scribe

Summer 2011 [Volume 35. Issue 28]

Summer

in Colorado Springs

New degrees, looks and names.............................................page 4 – 6 Things to read, do and see.................................................pages 7 – 10 Graduating athletes, new recruits..................................pages 11 & 12 Politics, communication & humor.....................................page 13 – 15

editorial

Page 2

May 10 to May 16, 2011

People are just people.

Editor-in-Chief Avalon Manly It’s a tradition at The Scribe that the last issue of the year is filled with the reflections and farewells of graduating writers. In the almost four years I’ve worked for this paper, I’ve read a great many columns of advice, nostalgia and bittersweet adieu.

But the thing is, there are only so many ways to say goodbye. I’m not sure how to piece together the words of a finale without sounding stale and recycled. Anything I can say here would end up sounding like the same old thing; too many goodbyes and this whole issue begins to read like a broken record.

So instead of bemoaning the upcoming cessation of my undergraduate career, or waxing twitterpated on the subject of the work I’ll be doing after graduation, I’m going to pass on the piece of wisdom that’s helped carry me through most of my college years, and will, I’m sure, continue to support me throughout the rest of my life.

A few years ago, I was sitting with a friend, and he was listening to me as I spewed a laundry list of dislikes against one of our mutual acquaintances.

When he sensed a break in my tirade, he smiled at me, shrugged and answered, “People are just people.” Then he poured me a fresh cup of tea, and we passed to happier subjects.

Those four words ring in my mind every time I find myself dealing with people who rub me the wrong way. The world is full of abrasive and agitating people; some of them are legitimately reprehensible, for moral or other reasons – but most of them are just perfectly normal folks who, somehow, get under our skin and nibble away at our patience, peace, resolve

or self-control.

Now, the world is full of tips for dealing with the irritants and annoyances of everyday life. The most helpful tactic for me, though, has always been my friend’s advice, that little slogan that has become my mantra: People are just people.

I know I sound like Dr. Seuss now, but however you look at it, that’s all it ever comes down to. People are just people. No matter how dislikable, irritating or abrasive, people are, all of them, every one of us, just people.

What makes us different is unimportant, and negligible, compared to what makes us the same. When you next feel like you’re about to flip a disk and bite the head off some unsuspecting bystander, try reminding yourself that the source of your vexation is, like you, a person, with their own wants, needs, desires, joys and sorrows.

Humanizing your perceived adversaries drains your resentment and annoyance and replaces it with empathy, and the ability to repay ill treatment with kindness, which, if you’ll excuse my proselytizing, is something sorely lacking in the world.

The “people are just people” philosophy has colored my college career. I think back on the five years I’ve spent in institutes of higher learning, and I can’t even hope to recall all the classes I’ve taken. I’d be hardpressed to accurately recount my own GPA without checking. Sometimes I can’t even remember where I parked.

But I do remember the people. I remember the professors who indulged my curiosities, corrected my mistakes, praised my successes, challenged my complacencies and sparked my interest in their subjects by sharing what they knew. I remember the off-campus employer who gave me a steady job in an unsteady market for six straight years, who taught me to be simultaneously creative and efficient – and how to dodge 200-degree boiling caramel before it can leech off your skin like lava. I remember the odd jobs that taught me about everything from how to make a good cappuccino to how caves form to how

poorly advised it is to talk to strangers at noon on a weekday in the middle of Acacia Park. I remember the horrid all-nighters, the sleep-deprivationinduced hallucinations, the cramming, the heated BSing of papers and presentations, the frequent split-second weighing of how well I really needed to do on any given assignment versus how much fun a spontaneous outing promised to be. I remember surviving for days at a time on Easy Mac and coffee, not because real people food was in short supply, but because it was convenient and heavily caffeinated. I remember hating my alarm more with every passing day, fighting to become both conscious and vertical, and becoming legitimately concerned for my sanity when, during my last semester, I signed up for an 8 a.m. class.

I remember the friends I made. I remember the late-night (read: allnight) talks about politics and philosophy and zombies. I remember the endless flow of coffee and cheap I-Hop pancakes, which I swear to God I will never eat again. I remember the ill-conceived midnight shenanigans, which may or may not at some point have included spray painting poetry on box cars, and the hours spent on swings in random parks throughout the city. I remember the music and the laughter and, yes, the tears. Some of those friends I will leave behind as we walk across that stage next week; others, I will carry with me into the rest of my life, just as they will carry me into theirs.

I remember my family, who never suspected that I might fail. I remember my parents, the wellsprings of kindness and goodness and passion in my world.

I don’t remember what classes I took over the years, or my graduating grade point average. I don’t remember the endless drab lectures, or the innumerable blithering essays.

I remember the people.

College isn’t about just getting an education – or, at least, it shouldn’t be.

College, like all things, is about people.

And people, like all people, are just people.

the scribe The official student newspaper of the University of Colorado at Colorado Springs

Editor-in-Chief.........................................Avalon Manly Managing Editor........................................Jessica Lynch Business Manager..........................................Matt Baatz Advertising/Sales Manager..........................Luis Hidalgo News Editor..................................................Matt Sidor Athletics Editor......................................Matt Crandall Opinion/Scribble Editor...........................Cherise Fantus Photograhy Editor.................................Ariel Lattimore Copy Editor.............................................Cherise Fantus Web Master.............................................Dorian Rogers Layout Designers..........................................J.D. Osorio ..................................................................Emily Olson Reporters...................................................Alex Cramer ............................................................Ryan Piechowski .................................................................Sara Horton ...................................................................Ryan Adams Photographer.........................................Michelle Wood Junior Reporters......................................Molly Mrazek ......................................................Marguerite Breeden Contributors...........................................Steven Farrell Cartoonist............................................................Arno Distributor...........................................Donald Trujillo Advisor.....................................................Laura Eurich Cover Photo by Avalon Manly

Recycle this paper.

Don’t be a jerk, man.

The Scribe UC 106

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student life

May 10 to May 16, 2011

all aboard

failboat

the

Page 3

Is Snooki from Detroit?

Not only is Detroit one of the most economically depressed cities in the United States, but according to a recent report conducted and released by the Detroit Regional Workforce Fund, it is also one of the most illiterate. Based on the study’s findings, more than 200,000 Detroit residents, approximately 47 percent of the population, are “functionally illiterate.” This means that almost half of its citizens can’t fill out basic forms like job applications or read prescription labels. While there are multitudinous reasons for these shocking numbers, the greatest shock is that half of the illiterate population “somehow made it through public school.” So, the big question is, what in the Hell are they teaching if it isn’t reading and writing?

When carving little hearts in trees just isn’t enough

The UCCS graduating visual art students’ exhibit can be viewed the remainder of this week in GOCA. The exhibition showcases work from 10 students and can be seen from 12 p.m. - 6 p.m.

For some, it appears that graffiti is a way of life. Roger and Carolyn Mooyoung, of New York, have been married 23 years and vacation every year at their seasonal home in southern Florida. They recently received a letter from the Lee County Code Enforcement, which informed them that their vacation home’s garage door had been vandalized – with a marriage proposal. The words “Will you marry me Allison?” were scrawled in green paint, and next to them, what appeared to be the reply: “Yes.” It seems that in a moment of celebratory abandon, the couple drove their car into the Mooyoung’s garage door, denting it, totaling the Mooyoung’s replacement costs at more than $1,100. “I feel sorry for them because if they get married, they’re going to have problems,” said Carolyn Mooyoung. “I mean, that’s pretty immature.”

FTW

If you wish to forget anything on the spot, make a note that this thing is to be remembered.

-- Edgar Allan Poe

Fill out the sudoku puzzle below so that each row and column contain the numbers 1 through 9 with none repeated. Return it to the Scribe office when finished, along with the adjacent crossword; if you’re the first one done (and Puzzle 1 (Very hard, difficulty rating 0.75) they’re done right), you’ll be awarded with a Scribe T-shirt.

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Fifteen Things You Can Do Instead of Just Sitting on Your Ass this Summer

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Generated by http://www.opensky.ca/~jdhildeb/software/sudokugen/ on Sun May 8 22:55:13 2011 GMT. Enjoy!

Across 2 Because respawning is what all the cool kids do during summer, right?

4 It's summer, there's no school, and it's too hot to do real people things. Time for some R&R. 5 You need a way to fund all that sitting-arounddoing-nothing time.

6 Did you hear? Theaters have air conditioning now, and popcorn counts as a balanced breakfast.

7 It's at least cooler in the water than not.

9 Nothing leaves your mark on the world like creating something new. And I'm sure the birds would really love something crooked and splintery to eat from.

11 As long as we're being wholesome and sustainable, you may as well grow your own salad.

12 Because nothing's on TV. You may as well.

13 I know, ew, but apparently some people see summer as the opportunity to shed a few pounds rather than subsist entirely on chips and beer.

14 It doesn't matter what's on.

15 You're surrounded by mountains. Go climb them.

Down 1 The summer standby for college kids. Sit, stare at the ceiling and do thought experiments regarding nihilism.

3 No, really. People totally go to school over the summer. I know, right?

8 Nothing says "summer" like fighting over your fire-roasted tin-can breakfast with a hungry bear.

10 No summer is complete without a decent risk of melanoma.

Page 4

news

May 10 to May 16, 2011

CU Regents approve projected tuition increase

SENG to be renamed this week in recognition of donations

Ryan Piechowski

amanly@uccs.edu

rpiechow@uccs.edu Concerns about tuition rates at UCCS have been refueled this semester as the University of Colorado Board of Regents recently announced there would be yet another increase in undergraduate tuition costs. Beginning in the Fall of 2011, UCCS undergrad students will pay an additional $450 dollars per year in overall tuition costs.

A recent meeting in downtown Denver among the CU Board of Regents approved the tuition increases on all four CU campuses. At a nearly seven percent increase, the Regents were able to keep the elevated tuition rates to just below the nine percent cap established by the Colorado Department of Higher education. The UCCS rate increase is among one of the lowest in the state of Colorado and the overall cost of attending UCCS including tuition, fees, room and board, is expected to increase by no more than 5.3 percent. The Board of Regents felt the increase was necessary because of the nearly 30 percent recent reduction of state funding over the past three years.

“We recognize the financial difficulties that many students and their families face,” Chancellor Pam Shockley-Zala-

bak said. “We continue to do everything possible to contain costs, maintain quality and work with students individually to ensure that they can achieve their goal of a college education,” she furthered.

New UCCS students, freshmen and sophomores with Colorado residency will pay up to $6,720 for two semesters of tuition beginning the Fall 2011 semester. This is a slight increase from the $6,270 UCCS students were required to pay this school year. Junior and senior full time students with Colorado residency will pay a slightly steeper cost at $7,230 for two semesters. This equates to a $480 increase from the $6,750 required this year.

This seven percent overall increase was established for full-time students with Colorado residency. Non-Colorado residents will continue to pay a tuition rate that is more than double what instate residents pay. Non-Colorado residents will see the tuition they paid for one academic year raise to $16,240.

That is a $320 increase.

The newly revamped UCCS website offers current and future undergraduate students a resource to calculate how much they will be paying and set up potential payment options. These helpful resources can be found on the Bursar’s Office webpage accessed directly through the UCCS official website. S

UCCS introduces new look to campus home page Molly Mrazek mmrazek@uccs.edu After a year in the making, UCCS has completed changes to its website. These alterations ensure it is in accordance with the CU system’s branding initiative.

According to Kirk Moore, Web Services Manager with Information Technology, “The new home page layout is really designed around showcasing the beauty of the UCCS campus and the excellent students and faculty we have at UCCS. We also wanted to make an accessible and user-friendly web site for our customers to use.”

The branding initiative affected all the CU campuses including Boulder, Denver and the Anschutz Medical Campus.

Changes were made to the logo, font style and campus color schemes.

Due to the number of Colorado institutions, it’s important, according to the branding initiative, for the University to have a

solid brand identity.

The website was designed by teams from University Advancement as well as IT Web Services. According to Moore, there was nothing wrong with the design of the website before, they just needed to incorporate the new colors and logos.

Moore furthered, “The web is dynamic, and we want the UCCS website to be dynamic and fresh for our visitors.”

So far, only the design has been altered. Soon, however, the site’s current navigations system will also be changed.

This step will focus on the needs of the faculty, students and community members. Moore said they are hoping to find a layout strategy that will help people find what they’re looking for both faster and more efficiently.

Although stage two is barely in its beginning stages, audience research is currently being conducted. This research will enable those involved in revamping the site to hone in on the specific needs of its primary users. S

Visit the Scribe online at uccsscribe.com.

It’s epic.

We promise.

Avalon Manly The Science and Engineering Building, UCCS’ largest, most recent addition to campus, will be renamed on Thursday, May 12, to honor the most significant benefactors in UCCS history.

Locals Ed and Mary Osborne have given generously to UCCS for many years. This most recent endowment, an estate commitment, will partner

with their past donations to create a total donated sum exceeding $10 million. This donation, according to a press release, will “support an Osborne Scholarship Fund, the Department of Mechanical and Aerospace Engineering, the CU Aging Center, the Family Development Center, Theatreworks, and general UCCS operating support.”

At the ceremony this week, the Science and Engineering Building will become the Osborne Science and Engineering Center, in honor of the Osborne’s generous gifts. S

Photo courtesy of cusys.edu

The Science and Engineering Building will, after this week, be known as the Osborne Science and Engineering Center, to honor the Osborne’s donations.

UCCS offers new entrepreneurship minor Matt Sidor msidor@uccs.edu Starting this fall, a new Entrepreneurship Minor will be offered through the College of Business. The minor is a business program, but can be paired with any major here at UCCS and will be a great option for students looking to beef up their academic transcript with courses that teach how to start your own business from the ground up.

Tom Duening, director of the school’s Center for Entrepreneurship and the El Pomar Chair of Business and Entrepreneurship, will work together with Morgan Shepherd, an information systems professor, as the faculty for the program.

Startup companies in the U.S. are creating an average of three million jobs annually, according to Duening. In contrast, large companies are decreasing their U.S. workforces. “If we want to dig out of this lingering jobs recession, we have to train, encourage, and assist startup ventures in our community and country,” Duening said. “This region is a perfect laboratory for experiments in new venture creation. It has tremendous untapped potential.”

This renewed focus on small businesses is part of a larger trend nationwide: UCCS will be joining about 1,500 other schools in the country which offer either minor or major programs in entrepreneurship. The business schools at the CU Boulder and Denver campuses offer

certificate programs, but to date haven’t offered a minor or major; UCCS will be the first campus in the CU system to do so.

Duening will teach an initial course called “New Venture Creation” to introduce students to opportunity identification, evaluation and feasibility.

Students who continue in the program will learn issues surrounding venture creation including funds needed for launch, growth, and exit. Students will also prepare business plans and present their plans to groups of seasoned investors.

The program is slated to include frequent guest lectures by about two dozen local entrepreneurs to provide real-world insight into the world of business startups and how to create a successful company in the Pikes Peak region.

The minor is most easily added for current Business majors, but students outside the business school can choose among elective courses in accounting, finance, human relations, information management, marketing, management to fulfill the business school’s core curriculum requirements.

The other minors offered by the School of Business are accounting, finance, general business, human resource management, information systems, international business, management, marketing, and service management.

For more information about the new minor in entrepreneurship, contact: Thomas Duening at tduening@uccs.edu.

news

May 10 to May 16, 2011

Page 5

Graduate research added to UCCS mission statement as approved by Senate Education Committee Cherise Fantus cfantus@uccs.edu The Senate Education Committee voted in favor of a mission change proposal for UCCS and CSU-Pueblo to clarify the role and mission of UCCS and allow the university to offer selected graduate programs at CSUPueblo.

The change will add graduate research to the UCCS mission statement. The bill states, “The Colorado Springs campus of the University of Colorado shall be a comprehensive baccalaureate and specialized graduate research university with selective admission standards.”

The graduate program at UCCS makes up about 20 percent of the 9,000-member student body. Graduate researchers have found it difficult in the past to receive funding because the word “research” was not in the mission statement.

"Our faculty and researchers have made extraordinary strides in establishing this campus as a research university," Chancellor Pam Shockley-Zalabak said in an in-

terview with Tom Hutton. “But nearly every application had to explain why the word 'research' was not there. I hope we will soon no longer have that obstacle.”

The addition of research in the mission statement will make it easier for applicants to receive federal and state funding.

“This change will assist UCCS in becoming more competitive for federal funds and other grant opportunities,” said Shockley-Zalabak.

A limited number of graduate programs will be added to CSU-Pueblo, including a Doctorate of Nursing Practice degree, which is an important component of nursing. In order to maintain accreditation by the American Association of Colleges of Nursing, it needs to be recommended by 2015.

“The provisions in this bill will allow CSU-Pueblo to continue to address the health care needs of Southern Colorado, specifically the shortage of health care professionals,” said CSU-Pueblo Interim President Julio Leon.

CSU-Pueblo currently may offer master’s-level graduate programs, but the bill would allow them to offer

selected graduate programs in fields such as nursing.

“Nursing education has an enormous role to play in the preparation of care providers who will be equipped to meet the many challenges that we face as a community and a nation,” said Associate Dean of the CSU Pueblo Department of Nursing Donna Wofford, “The CSU-Pueblo Department of Nursing has the privilege, opportunity, and responsibility to ‘re-imagine’ the future of nursing and address health care cost, delivery, and access in southern Colorado.”

The measure received a unanimous vote by the Senate Education Committee on April 20. As a result of the approval by this committee, the measure will next be voted on by the full Senate membership. If it is approved by the Senate, it will go to the House of Representatives, after which it must be approved by Governor John Hickenlooper.

As long as everything happens accordingly, the act will take effect on August 10, 2011. If, however, a referendum petition is filed, the act will be subject to a vote by the people at the general election, held in November of 2012. S

UCCS hopes to garner additional funds through donations Matt Sidor msidor@uccs.edu University of Colorado President Bruce Benson has announced a $1.5 billion fundraising campaign for the university system called “Creating Futures” – the largest fundraiser in CU history.

The silent phase of this campaign began in July 2006, and $900 million has already been raised since then; large fundraisers typically conduct a silent phase in order to build momentum and engage key constituents.

The now public phase of the campaign will continue until the end goal is reached with an additional $600 million.

“CU is an outstanding university and we intend to build on its greatness with the support of alumni, friends and organizations that will help us add value to our academic and research endeavors,” Benson said. “This campaign will enable CU to continue to provide students with access to a world-class education and allow the university to augment its role as an economic driver and jobs creator that advances the economy, health and culture of Colorado and beyond.”

The campaign is focused on four “pillars of excellence and impact,” which encompass all the university’s activities: learning and teaching, discovery and innovation, community and culture, and health and wellness.

Priorities have been determined through strategic planning directed by university and campus leadership; many projects are cooperative efforts among several CU campuses.

The CU total annual budget is $2.7 billion dollars, or approximately 5 percent of the total Colorado state budget.

Governor John Hickenlooper appeared at the announcement event to lend his support, saying, “This does not in any was reduce the obligation of the legislature or the state” to support higher education.

This fundraising campaign isn’t going to be a bake sale or a car wash, and there won’t be collection jars at the Information Desk to drop your spare change into.

This is a targeted campaign specifically for very highdollar donations from wealthy philanthropists and organizations.

Major donors so far include the Anschutz Foundation (more than $40 million), the Colorado Health Foundation (more than $15 million), the Gates Frontiers Fund (more than $14 million), the ALSAM Foundation (more than $12 million) and $5 million from Pinnacol Assurance. Also, an anonymous donor gave $5.5 million, mostly for scholarships at UCCS, and the estate of Louise Bennett Reed gave nearly $5 million for athletic scholarships at Boulder.

Of the money raised so far during the silent phase, about 50 percent has gone to research, 28 percent to

Photo courtesy of earthviz.info

Though UCCS won’t be asking for donations like this, the University is in the midst of fund-raising.

faculty and program improvements, 13 percent to capital improvements (facility upgrades and new buildings) and 8.5 percent to scholarships. The CU Foundation expects to keep these proportions through the end of the public phase.

For more information on the campaign, visit cufund. org/campaign. S

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Page 6

news

May 10 to May 16, 2011

University adopts new logo to prevent brand confusion Matt Sidor msidor@uccs.edu

Just like any private corporation, universities have a brand identity used in marketing and communications to present a consistent image for the school.

But for decades now, the CU system’s brand identity has been inconsistent at best. We’re all familiar with those gold-colored “CU” letters, with the “U” attached just below the “C”, but until now it was left up to each department, group, organization, school or campus as to whether their logo and brand would include it. This led to a lot of confusion among people both within and outside of the university system.

For example, the CU Law School at the Boulder campus has had a black, brown and green logo that says “ColoradoLaw” (indeed, the current web site at colorado.edu/law still has this logo) – at first glance, it’s not apparent whether the school is part of a larger university system or is its own indeImage courtesy of Matt Sidor pendent school. Furthermore, even if you can figure out that its part of a uni- The wide variety of logos used by clibs, organizations, departments and events affiliated with UCCS has been, over the yeras, confusversity, which Colorado University is ing. Thanks to this shift, the university will present a more consistent and rexognizable brand. it? retaining a unique identity as a satellite came strictly from interest earnings on competitive peer analysis (with six simiThe Boulder campus is home to a number of nationally-recognized re- campus. Remnants of the old logo linger CU investments, many have asked if this lar university systems), message develsearch institutions, such as the Labora- in some parts, including a large floor mat was really the best way to use that money opment, visual image development [and] tory of Atmospheric and Space Physics at the west entrance to Kraemer Family in a time of steep budget cuts and sharp implementation.”

McConnellogue added, “I would point (LASP), the Cooperative Institute for Library. In more recent years we settled tuition increases.

Ken McConnellogue, associate vice out that the project entails far more than Research in Environmental Sciences on the rectangular UCCS logo with the (CIRES), and the CU Museum of Natu- mountain backdrop, but even this logo president for university advancement, a ‘new logo and font.’ In involves how ral History. Glancing at the web sites differed from the other campus brands in stresses that the inconsistency in the the university presents itself in messages school’s brand was already a waste of and visual images to its various constitufor each of these organizations, one can font type and color scheme.

In the Fall of 2008, the university money. “[The different logos] confuse ents. Logos and font are part of that, but see that each was tasked with formulating its own logo; some of them look like began an effort to redesign our logo and the constituents we are trying to commu- only a small part.”

Over the next year, CU entities will be something a post-doc might have had to unify our brand identity across all the nicate with and cause message and imdraw up in his or her own spare time. Al- campuses and research groups. Landor age clutter in a world where people are expected to phase out their current logos most none of them include the CU brand, Associates, an international consulting already overloaded with information and and designs in favor of the new standard; the new web site for UCCS is one exlending to some confusion as to whether group based in California (with a broad images.”

When asked why the university chose ample of the new brand. For the UCCS or not they are even a part of the univ- portfolio of brands such as FedEx, Kraft, and Altoids), was chosen after a compet- an outside contractor instead of someone campus, University Advancement has eristy system. in-house, McConnellogue said they re- created a web site devoted exclusively Even the Boulder campus itself had an itive bid process.

Two-and-a-half years and $780,000 jected the idea due to the project’s broad to the new standards. The changes may inconsistent logo, with white “Colorado” text floating in front of an image of the later, the result is some new colors, a complexity and scope with, “more than appear subtle and insubstantial, but CU new font, and a lengthy set of strict de- 12,000 survey research questionnaires, President Bruce Benson believes that Flatiron mountains. about 50 in-person interviews with key “...[the new] branding will enhance our In the 1990s, our own campus flirted sign standards.

At first glance, one can easily won- stakeholders inside and outside the uni- critical efforts to effectively engage our with the name “CU The Springs” instead of UCCS in an attempt to appear more der whether that 0.78 million dollars was versity, the data analysis on all that re- audiences, promote our value and attract integrated with the CU system while still money well spent. Although the funds search, internal situational analysis, funding.” S

Annual Film Festival winners announced

On Saturday, April 30th, the The Film Club at UCCS held its 10th Annual Film Festival in Dwire Hall. Awards were presented in the following categories: Best Animated Short, Best Live-Action Comedy, Best Live-Action Drama, Best Documentary, Best Experimental, Best Music Video, and Audience Choice. The festival and competition was open to all students – whether or not they were members of the club – and the only limitation was that the films had to be six minutes or less.

Some films weren’t part of the competition and were therefore ineligible for the category awards, but they were still eligible for the Audience Choice award.

The entries were:

Story by Matt Sidor, msidor@uccs.edu

Evolveré by Shaun Cruise (Winner for Best Animated Short) Shiny Things Trailer by Alexander Koshak on behalf of Devin Hume Enabling Dreams: Terry’s Story by Rebecca Bigler and Erica Fellion (Winner for Best Documentary) Amy directed by Dillon Novak, produced by Kevin Beechwood and Aaron DePry Airhead by Josh Lobeck Iaga Trailer by Dustin Dunaway Heaven Help Us by Austin Richman The Game by Joseph Ruffini Creep Trailer directed by Pete Schuermann, produced by Kevin Beechwood and Nancy Theken Art in Motion by Kellen Ryan It’s Your Call by Austin Richman Starry Eyed by Josh Lobek Waking Eyes Trailer by Sarah R. Lotfi Letter D by Samuel Scott (Winner for Best Live-Action Drama) The Fallout directed by Dillon Novak, produced by Kevin Beechwood and Aaron De Pry (Winner for Best Music Video) The Good Times by Kellen Ryan and Shawn Cruse (Winner for Best Live-Action Comedy)

culture

May 10 to May 16, 2011

Page 7

The Scribe’s Top Ten Summer Reads “Transmetropolitan,” by Warren Ellis

By Avalon Manly and Jessica Lynch

Whether you’re a hardcore graphic novel fan or are new to the world of the comic book, “Transmetropolitan” is an experience for readers of all ages – as long as those readers don’t mind some swearing, violence and unapologetic cynicism. These ten comics follow jaded, misanthropic journalist Spider Jerusalem in his quest to oust lies, destroy the careers of corrupt public officials and just generally be a pain in society’s ass.

If you like “Transmet,” you’ll also like “Watchmen,”

by Allen Moore, “The Nightly News,” by Jonathan Hickman and “Kingdom Come,” by Alex Ross and Mark Waid.

“South,” by Sir Ernest Henry Shackleton

From 1914 to 1916, a group of British explorers, led by Ernest Shackleton, were stranded in Antarctica. In the face of brutal cold, sparse supplies, little hope and no foreseeable rescue, Shackleton kept all 22 of his men alive and returned them safely to their homes. His journal, simply called “South,” is the record of his remarkable journey, from becoming stranded on the ice, through their travels across an uncharted island to reach salvation.

If you like “South,” you’ll also like “Rocket Boys,” by Homer Hickam, “The Shock Doctrine,” by Naomi Klein and “The Diary of a Young Girl,” by Anne Frank.

“Ender’s Game,” by Orson Scott Card

If you’re a science fiction fan and haven’t read this book, shame on you. Card’s renowned commentary on war, politics and human nature has been the capstone of science fiction for years; his endearing characters and heartfelt themes, spun together in an action-packed and merciless plot, are the stuff of great literature. Protagonist Ender, a little boy with prodigious skills in war, is trained to commit a genocide he doesn’t fully understand.

If you like “Ender’s Game,” you’ll also like “Fahrenheit 451,” by Ray Bradbury, “Dune,”

by Frank Herbert and “Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?” by Phillip K. Dick.

“Howl’s Moving Castle,” by Diana Wynne Jones

Diana Wynne Jones has written a myriad of novels that have found their way into traditional fictional canon, “Howl” being among the most famous of them. A young girl named Sophie is cursed by an evil witch into the body of a crone, and is forbidden from telling anyone who she really is. Sophie enters the service of the wizard Howl, and is drawn into his world of magic and conflict.

If you like “Howl’s Moving Castle,” you’ll also like “Prince Ombra,” by Roderick Macleash, “The Sight,” by David Clement-Davies and “Stardust,” by Neil Gaiman.

“Sandman Slim,” by Richard Kadrey

Part apocalyptic action, part irreverent humor and part comic-book snark, “Sandman Slim” is Richard Kadrey’s literary debut, and every page is laced with dark hilarity. Badass misanthrope James Stark has escaped from Hell, where he’s been trapped for the last 11 years, to extract revenge on all the people who sent him there. He lands in L.A., all brimstone and attitude, and proceeds to go on the world’s most sarcastic killing spree.

If you like “Sandman Slim,” you’ll also like “Good Omens,” by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman, “Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy,” by Douglas Adams and “Cat’s Cradle,” by Kurt Vonnegut.

“Harry Potter” by J.K. Rowling

While most of you have read these incredible books (I read each one in approximately two days without any sleep), for those of you who haven’t, they are a must read. To summarize, the book is about three friends, Hermione, Harry and Ron and their adventures as wizards in a plight against the Dark Lord, Lord Voldemort. The underlying message of the series is that love and friendship conquer all.

If you like “Harry Potter,” you’ll also like “The Last Unicorn,” by Peter S. Beagle and “The Princess Bride” by William Goldman.

“Sunshine” by Robin McKinley

As a fantasy novel, “Sunshine” takes place in an alter universe in conflict with vampires, werewolves and demons, also known as the “Others.”

Rae “Sunshine” Seddon, the main character of the book, is captured by a clan of Vampires. With a new found gift, she escapes with another imprisoned vampire named Constantine and the two team up to battle his enemies. If you’re considering reading “Twilight,” don’t, because this book puts it to shame.

If you like “Sunshine” you’ll also like “Pride and Prejudice” by Jane Austen and “Wuthering Heights” by Emily Bronte.

“The Devil in the White City,” by Erik Larson

Written in novel style, which is helpful if you, like me, don’t get overly animated over nonfiction, this story intertwines the true stories of Daniel H. Burnahm, a brilliant architect, and Dr. H.H. Holmes, a chilling mass murderer. Set in 1893 during Chicago’s World’s Fair, the book details the events lengthy construction, the economic challenges of the time and the countless women who got lost in the masses and died by Holmes’ hands.

If you like “The Devil in the White City,” you will also like “American Lightening” by Howard Blum and “Satan’s Circus” by Mike Dash.

“Life of Pi” by Yann Martel Another fantasy book, the “Life of Pi” is a book about an Indian boy named Piscine Molitor. In the book he explores and deals with issues of spirituality while surviving 227 days after a shipwreck on a boat in the Pacific Ocean with a Bengal tiger named Richard Parker. Although I read the book years ago, it’s still one I look back fondly on and will most likely re-read in the near future.

If you like “Life of Pi” you’ll also like “Water for Elephants” by Sara Gruen and “The Kite Runner” by Khaled Hosseini.

“Outliers” by Malcolm Gladwell A nonfiction piece, this book divided into two parts.

The first is the “Opportunity” section and the second section is titled “Legacy.” The book focuses on those people who are outliers. In other words, these are the people who do not fit the normal understanding of exceptional people. The book focuses not on what successful people “are like” but more so where they are from. Family, culture and friendship all play integral roles in an individual’s success.

If you like “Outliers” you’ll also like “The Tipping Point” by Malcolm Gladwell and “Born to Run” by Christopher McDougall.

culture

Page 8

MOVIE GUIDE

Summer 2011

May 10 to May 16, 2011

Story by Sara Horton, shorton@uccs.edu

For years now, little else than prequels, sequels, book-to-movie adaptations and superhero movies have shown in theatres. Unfortunately, they continue their reign this summer for one of two reasons: Either studios seem to be fresh out of new ideas, or they just want to play it safe and make money through regurgitation. While Hollywood searches for its lost creativity, take a look at some of the movies playing this summer:

“Bridesmaids” - May 13 Saturday Night Live’s Kristen Wiig is a maid of honor in way over her head with her best friend’s catty bridesmaids. Although this sounds like a chick flick, I didn’t pick up that vibe after I watched the trailer and listened to one bridesmaid suggest a “Fight Club” themed bachelorette party where the girls surprise and “beat the crap” out of the bride. “Bridesmaids” looks like a comedy that can be enjoyed by everyone, especially if you’ve ever been part of a wedding. It’s about time an all-female cast gets an opportunity to show they’re just as funny as the fellas.

“Priest” - May 13 Based on the graphic novel series, “Priest” is set in a world caught in a long war between man and vampires.

After vampires kidnap his niece, a man breaks church law by embarking on a rescue mission to track down the bloodsuckers. Unless you’re not sick of vampires yet, save your money. The last time director Scott Charles Stewart and Paul Bettany teamed up for a religious horror movie, the result was the ill-received “Legion.”

Although the photography and trailers are visually appealing, you have to wonder what makes Stewart think “Priest” will experience a different fate.

“X-Men: First Class” - June 3 Now that the X-Men franchise has seemingly run out of sequels, a prequel opens this summer. “First Class” takes place in the 1960s when Charles Xavier starts a school and assembles a team with superhuman abilities. X-Men fans are already upset about “First Class” because it depicts events that never happened in the comics. After watching the trailers, I don’t see why this prequel had to be made. I’m even more confused by the talent: James McAvoy, Rose Byrne and Michael Fassbender are all actors I would never expect to see in a superhero movie, especially one that is receiving such negative publicity.

“Green Lantern” - June 17 Ryan Reynolds plays a pilot who is given a ring that grants him powers and exclusive membership into an intergalactic team that maintains peace throughout the galaxy. Honestly, the plot sounds pretty stupid. The trailers don’t build much more hope, but I have never really liked any superhero other than Batman, so I may not be giving “Green Lantern” a fair chance. I don’t think Reynolds can save this one, but I hope he can because writers have already been hired for the sequel.

“Pirates of the Caribbean: On “Transformers: Dark of the Moon” - July 1 Stranger Tides” - May 20 For the finale of “Transformers,” the Autobots learn a Cybertronian spacecraft is hidden on the moon and its secrets could result in unthinkable consequences.

As someone who has not even seen the first “Transformers,” I consequently have no interest in this movie and cannot be bothered to feign much interest. After “Transformers 2,” director Michael Bay apologized for its bad quality and promised “Dark of the Moon” would be better. Since Bay has replaced Megan Fox this time around, I trust him and hope he will follow through.

Photo courtesy of cinemovie.tv

“At World’s End” felt like a nice conclusion, but the “Pirates” franchise is being brought back so Jack Sparrow can find the fountain of youth and battle Blackbeard and his daughter for its prize. Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley have bowed out, but Penelope Cruz will take their place as a woman from Jack’s past. No Will or Elizabeth makes me hesitant to get excited about this one because, as much as I like Jack Sparrow, he is not enough to sell this one-man show. However, Geoffrey Rush will return as Barbossa, and that will probably be enough for me buy a ticket.

“The Hangover Part II” - May 26 Phil, Stu and Alan travel to Bangkok for Stu’s wedding (no, he’s not getting married to the hooker), and another post-blackout adventure ensues. There’s not much more to tell. The plot is basically the same idea from the first “Hangover” but in a different location and a monkey thrown in for kicks. Although the originality is obviously lacking, the trailer proves the second “Hangover” still may have some magic when Zach Galifianakis confuses a monastery for a P.F. Chang’s. The cast list also confirms that Mr. Chow, everyone’s favorite Asian gangster, will make an appearance.

“Cowboys & Aliens” - July 29

“Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2” - July 15 In the final installment of the Harry Potter movies, Harry, Ron and Hermione return to Hogwarts and battle Voldemort.

The trailers and teaser footage promise a dramatic and explosive end to the series, and I will be floored if the “Deathly Hal-

lows” does not top the summer box office. You don’t have to have followed every Harry Potter movie to see this.

Those of us who have grown up with Harry Potter will probably want to see “Deathly Hallows” just to reminisce and say goodbye…or make fun of the people who cry when the credits begin to roll.

Photo courtesy of aceshowbiz. com

Photo courtesy of blogs.coventrytelegraph.net Based on Scott Mitchell Rosenberg’s graphic novel, “Cowboys & Aliens” takes place in 1873 in Arizona Territory. A spaceship arrives, and humanity’s only hope is a group of cowboys from a small desert town that won’t go down without a fight. Although the movie’s title sounds silly, the trailers go out of their way to defy that impression. The visual effects look stunning, and how many women can say no to Daniel Craig in a cowboy costume? Yes, “Cowboys & Aliens” is still another book-to-screen adaptation, but it looks like a strong contender for this summer’s best blockbuster.

“Captain America: the First Avenger” - July 22 Chris Evans stars as Steve Rogers, who is deemed unfit for the military and consequently volunteers for a research project that turns him into Nazi-fighting soldier Captain America. “The First Avenger” looks more promising than the “Green Lantern” because it’s a superhero movie and a war movie, an interesting combination with plenty of potential. Whether or not that potential is taken advantage of is not inherently obvious by just watching the trailers, but don’t dismiss “The First Avenger” quite yet.

“Rise of the Planet of the Apes” - August 5 This prequel to “Planet of the Apes” focuses on a man’s experiments with genetic engineering and how they lead to a battle for supremacy between humans and apes. A trailer credits Weta Digital, the visual effects company for “Avatar.” While the apes do look impressive, no degree of realism could keep me from laughing when they started hopping from rooftops and lunging at helicopters. “The Rise of the Planet of the Apes” is being marketed as completely serious, a tone that I do not expect to register with audiences at all. Unless you want a laugh, skip this and visit the primate house at the zoo instead.

culture

May 10 to May 16, 2011

Page 9

Outdoor Destinations in the Springs Story by Molly Mrazek, mmrazek@uccs.edu

There’s something to be said for the person that stays in town over summer break. Usually, it’s because they have nothing better to do. Sure, your excuse is you have a summer job and you are going to earn money for the coming year’s rent at your first apartment and pay a down-payment on a new car, but let’s be honest, you’re not all that excited about it, either.

Luckily, unlike some other less desirable places in Colorado, Colorado Springs has more than its fair share of fun activities. It’s important you have the best summer possible; therefore, the following list is for you to reference while you’re home and bored on a Wednesday in July.

Photo courtesy of mikebartonphoto.com

Garden of the Gods

Photo courtesy of planetwared.com

Obvious, I know. However, in most people’s hometowns the only thing remarkable to look at is something like a McDonald’s in an old train car (my hometown). Garden of the Gods has fun paths to walk, run and bike on, a gift store where you can buy your very own Indian arrowhead (replica) and sights such as The Balanced Rock and The Kissing Camels. If you don’t know what those are, that in itself is excuse enough to go and find out.

The Penny Arcade

Not many people know of this gem located on the main strip of Manitou Springs. Bring a couple bucks and you can play a wide assortment of every game imaginable, Skeeball, Pinball and various other games ending in “ball.” If you’re angry, there’s a game where you try to knock out a clown’s teeth. You know you’ve wanted to do that in real-life, now you can without being arrested or hauled away and thrown in a yellow padded room! There is also an area where you can play old school games with pennies, nickels and dimes.

Sky Sox game

Did you know that Colorado Springs has its very own minor league baseball team? Fortunately for you and your budget, the tickets are not expensive, especially on two dollar Tuesday’s where everything is, you guessed it, two dollars. Two dollar beers (for those of you that are 21). Enough said.

Photo courtesy of mediabistro.com

Photo courtesy of flickr.com

Pikes Peak Cog Railroad

Definitely the most expensive at $34 bucks a person, but definitely the most worth it. Especially for those of us who want to see the world from the top of Pikes Peak but will most likely die if we try to make the trek up. On the ride up you can see enormous rocks that could fall on you, a few questionable cabins where big foot might live, oh and the whole reason you live in Colorado: to enjoy the scenic, picturesque landscapes you’re only able to enjoy here. At 14,115 feet, it will quite literally take your breath away.

Photo courtesy of flickr.com

The Cheyenne Mountain Zoo

You never get too old to enjoy the monkeys at the Zoo. Or in this case, to get boogers wiped on your shirt sleeve by a Giraffe upon entering the Zoo. The Cheyenne Mountain Zoo sits at 6,800 feet above sea level, so is therefore probably one of the highest zoos, altitude wise, in the U.S. It’s one of the more expensive daytrips at about $17.25 per person; however, the monkeys that both sing and howl are well worth the price.

Photo courtesy of jewsbychoice.org

culture

Page 10

May 10 to May 16, 2011

Amanda’s Fonda: Perfect summer destination for Mexican food Sara Horton

shorton@uccs.edu Finding good Mexican food around Colorado Springs is difficult. Many Mexican restaurants are too Americanized and lack a certain authenticity, which usually reflects in how bland their food tastes. I can never pinpoint exactly what the food is missing and almost wish I had just gone to Taco Bell so I could have saved a few bucks. I have never had that problem with Amanda’s Fonda, though. Ever since I was introduced to Amanda’s Fonda a few years ago, I cannot help but make comparisons and conclude that it serves the best Mexican food in town.

Located at 3625 West Colorado Ave., Amanda’s Fonda is a family-owned restaurant. Recipes are from founder Amanda Lopez Burr’s grandmother, who lived and cooked in Guadalajara.

Amanda’s Fonda is a perfect place to eat during the summer because of its beautiful patio that overlooks a creek. Inside, the restaurant is just as attractive with its brightly painted walls, sombreros, framed artwork and Mexican kitsch decor. The only real drawback to the restaurant’s location is the cramped park-

ing: Sometimes there are not enough parking spaces to accommodate every customer. Weekends can get especially crazy during dinnertime, so drop in for lunch or an early dinner to avoid any problems.

Upon being seated, you receive a basket of chips and salsa to munch on while you wait. I typically don’t care much for filling up on free appetizers before my meal, but I enjoyed the chips and salsa as much as my entrée. The chips are thin, crispy and not too salty or greasy, and the salsa doesn’t have that nasty ketchup flavor that tends to be in many store brand salsas. The onions, peppers and cilantro taste fresh, and the salsa is just spicy enough to tickle the taste buds.

Amanda’s Fonda’s menu has plenty of choices: You order from a list of burritos, soups and a number of house specialties, including grilled steak tacos, spinach and beef enchiladas, taquitos and more. The “Bigger Than Life Burritos” are popular and cost anywhere from about $7 to $10, which may be a little more than some college students are willing to pay, but they are priced reasonably for the amount of food you get.

True to their name, the burritos are huge and served with hefty sides of

Photo by Ariel Lattimore

Amanda’s Fonda is worth the drive, for the atmostphere, food and prices that are all suited to a calm college demographic.

rice, cabbage salad, guacamole, pico de gallo, sour cream and a choice of either green or red sauce. When I asked my waiter about the difference between the two, he said both were mild but the red sauce had more flavor. I particularly enjoyed the red sauce, which added a nice kick to the chicken in the fajita burrito I ordered. Although I enjoyed every bite, the burrito was too big for me to finish all in one sitting. If you do choose to order a burrito, make sure you’re hungry or can at least take a box home.

I have never been unhappy with my

dining experience at Amanda’s Fonda.

Judging by how packed the restaurant is during the weekends, I must conclude I am far from being the only pleased repeat customer. Amanda’s Fonda’s menu states, “We honestly value your business.

The highest compliment you can give is the referral of your friends and family.”

Accordingly, I would like to pay a welldeserved compliment and recommend Amanda’s Fonda. If you’re looking for delicious food at a great venue, visit Amanda’s Fonda and enjoy Mexican food the way it is meant to taste. S

New Zealand artist Marcus Williams displays work at UCCS’ ‘Forgiving Exhibition’ Ryan Adams radams3@uccs.edu From April 29 through June 20, the UCCS Gallery of Contemporary Art (GOCA) will be displaying the artwork of Marcus Williams, an artist from Auckland, New Zealand. The work of Williams, his wife, Susan Jowsey and their children Jesse and Mercy Williams, is called “F4.” Co-Director Daisy McConnell is the spearhead for this exhibition, which she said started during a six month residency in New York City.

“The exhibit consists of art that explores the interfamily relations, power and the ways in which we wound each other and repair those wounds (forgiving, metaphorically speaking) in rela-

tionships. The props and postures are inspired by games the children invented or played in most circumstances,” stated McConnell. The art of “F4” is a collaboration of a family that lives and makes art together; each piece explores the dynamics of family life and interpersonal relationships in the political context of a growing global economy.

“F4” is a response to the introduction of children to the interpersonal relationship that Williams and his wife, both artists, have created. The exhibits main goal is to show the destabilization of power in relationships. These can be between males and females or children and adults. Like McConnell said, the props and postures of most of the art are created based on the minds of children. They are “a blend of imaginary and the lived experience,” said

Williams.

“The art culminates with the idea that political decisions and economic decisions are based on the desires and appetites of a few people instead of democratic, humanitarian and economic rationale,” said Williams. “It is really an interesting, descriptive collective exhibit,” he furthered.

From a personal perspective, I believe the art is very, very unique and that if you like underlying opinions and messages, this is a good exhibit for you.

The art may seem a little strange at first, but once you get the message of “F4” and what Williams is trying to portray, it will make more sense. Not being one who knows a whole lot about art, I really didn’t go into the exhibit expecting much.

The more I explored the more I

began to understand the message Williams was striving to create with the “F4” exhibit. The images are not what one would normally classify as beautiful; they are however, undoubtedly thought provoking. Some of the images were rather grotesque and at times unsettling, but made sense when viewed through Williams’ lens. Students are encouraged to view the exhibit with both an open mind and an appreciation for something different.

If you are interested in learning more about “The Forgiving Exhibition” and the F4 collective art, contact the UCCS GOCA at 719-255-3504 or e-mail Daisy McConnell at dmconne@ uccs.edu for more information. I highly recommend visiting the Forgiving Exhibition presented by Marcus Williams and the UCCS GOCA. S

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Photo courtesy of Ryan Adams

The Forgiving Exhibition has some unique artwork that will make you stop and think about what’s going on like with this image.

athletics

May 10 to May 16, 2011

UCCS athletes, writers bid farewell

Four years ago I was given the opportunity that only a small number of hopeful, young athletes get to experience; I was given a chance to fly out to a city I had never heard of in a state I never thought I’d visit to try out for an NCAA Division II soccer team.

I was given one chance to make an impression as a 17-year-old jumping in to a collegiate practice with guys who had fifty pounds and five years of age on me.

This marked the beginning of the toughest, yet most rewarding four years of my life.

I came in to UCCS with very little knowledge of the city, the university itself, or their athletics program.

I figured playing for a smaller school would dilute the competitive field a bit, but It wasn’t until I suited up for the first day of practice that I found out I had figured it all wrong. A “light” scrimmage quickly became the toughest, most physical practice I had ever participated in and this would be a recurring theme throughout my four-year collegiate career at UCCS. For a team with limited success in an unfamiliar university leads many to question just how hard it is to be a collegiate athlete. Throughout my four years here, I have heard people’s snide remarks about UCCS athletics and how “anyone could make those teams.” People hear qualifiers like “Division II,” or “losing record” and immediately dismiss the difficulty. As a four year letter winner and first hand witness, I believe I can speak for athletes of every UCCS sport when I say, come give it a try.

It isn’t until you are out there on the field, court, track, or course that the level of intensity can be truly understood; being a good UCCS athlete is a full time job that you must physically fight for everyday to keep as it can be taken away at any moment. These daily battles are followed up by sprints, weight lifting, medical treatment for unavoidable injuries, and film sessions, all intertwined between class projects, exams, homework Being a collegiate athlete is a pretty sweet gig, I know. For one, when you introduce yourself in class, people tend to remember you. Or at least, they remember that you’re an athlete, and that makes people automatically respect you and like you more, right? And two, it’s acceptable for you to go to class in sweats whether you’re sweaty from practice or not.

Coming from someone with experience, there’s no better feeling than being known and recognized on campus after a great victory where you played key minutes and came up big down the stretch. People eat that up.

They can’t help it. Well, on most campuses, that is.

While UCCS does not completely lack in school spirit, there is a depressingly large number of students who have never been to a basketball game or ventured down to Four Diamonds for a soccer or softball game. We just aren’t known for our athletics. This isn’t because our athletes lack any skill or effort, but rather, it’s because they are missing the backing of a strong, enthusiastic student body.

As a freshman at Bucknell University, being an athlete was a big freaking deal; sometimes I felt mildly like an obscure celebrity. Yes, it’s a Division I program and putting great time, money and energy into the athletics is pretty much expected, but it was more than that.

Athletics were revered and something to take genuine pride in by faculty, student body and the community, alike.

After I transferred to UCCS, I found that recognition decrease immensely. I was humbled by it, and while I didn’t necessarily enjoy the lack of awareness on campus, it urged me to be more than just a student-athlete. Yes, being on the team still made me feel pretty cool, but I received far more blank stares and questions like, “We have a gym?” than I was

Photos Courtesy of gomountainlions.com

and hours of studying. It is a non-stop routine that is not easily recognizable to those who doubt the amount of work a UCCS athlete puts in.

Alongside these bruising physical battles are constant tests of mental fortitude, maintaining an elite playing level while dealing with the stresses of limited playing time or consistent losses can weigh heavily on the mentally weak.

Those who are unable to balance the physical and emotional duress are washed away as quickly as they came in.

However, once you have learned the routine of a collegiate athlete at UCCS, the rush of competition and pride to wear the black and yellow sets in. You become more than just an attendee of UCCS, you are part of the college itself.

People on campus know who you are and what team you play on, whether you know them or not. Students take time to come and support what you have worked tirelessly to present to them; you become part of a group that not many people across the nation can say they have been a part of – an NCAA athlete.

I am proud to say I am part of this group and although I have completed my four year tenure at UCCS, I am proud to have gone through the good and bad. Now, looking back as my collegiate career closes, I can honestly say to those who doubt us that it’s not as easy as you may think.

Go Mountain Lions! S

prepared to endure.

Now, after nearly a year of being nothing more than a college student who works at the paper, I am able to look at the athletics program from an outside perspective.

And what I see is promising; I see the potential for a very healthy balance on and off the court.

What UCCS allows its athletes is an opportunity to look toward the future. The problem with college sports, I think, is its ignorance of what’s to come after school.

For the vast majority of college athletes, being skilled enough to go pro is about as much of an option as being struck by lightning.

Many times, athletes don’t prioritize well when balancing school and a sport. When an athlete wants nothing more than to be a great player, and fails to see beyond being an athlete and beyond graduation, he or she runs the risk of living life stuck in the glory days.

I promise you do not want the best years of your life to be those four seasons you played a college sport.

My dad, who played football at Fort Lewis, has told me about teammates who still cling to the past. Their stories are sad, many times extremely pathetic and something to completely avoid. Every student-athlete should strive to be and do more with their life. You will always be able to say you were a college athlete. No one can take that from you, just like no one can take that from me. But what did you learn from it? How did it help you go on to achieve and do more with your life? If you pursued excellence for this long, what’s stopping you for reaching for and attaining an even greater level of success? Don’t let late practices, early lifts and a tedious schedule make you settle. You deserve more than that. S

Page 11

That’s all, folks.

Ryan Piechowski rpiechow@uccs.edu

Hey, UCCS, thanks for giving me a chance for something more.

Jessica Lynch jlynch@uccs.edu

athletics

UCCS men’s and women’s basketball pick up several powerhouse recruits for 2011-12 Page 12

Matthew Crandall mcrandal@uccs.edu

The UCCS basketball program added several new faces to their perspective squads for next year’s 2011-12 season, including four new recruits for the men’s team and five for the women’s.

The Mountain Lions, who finished 9-17 (7-15 RMAC) last season, managed to acquire four agile recruits, including the 6-foot, 11-inch Lakewood, Calif. native, Kyle Clark. Clark played for Long Beach City College last year, where he averaged 7.4 points, 6.6 rebounds and 1.2 blocks per game.

“He is going to be a good leader for us and give us a very solid presence inside. Having someone his size move as well as he does is going to be a great asset to our program,” commented UCCS head coach, Russ Caton, via gomountainlions.com, “We are all excited about what Kyle can bring to the program.”

In addition to Clarke, the Mountain Lions added Overland High School guard Darius Pardner, Dodge City Community College guard/forward Matt Heydman, and 6-foot, 8-inch Justin Vorwaller, who attended Utah Valley Sate last year; UCCS may be able to provide more of an inside presence down low with the sought out size and agility they appeared to have found with the new additions.

On the other side of the court, the lady Mountain Lions, who finished 10-16 (813 RMAC) last season, added five new

players to their roster, all of whom possess the ability to score at will and run in the open court.

The 6-foot, 3-inch Broomfield High School native, Bre Burgesser, may undoubtedly bring a dominating presence in the middle. During her last season, she averaged nine points a game, and recorded 165 rebounds along with an impressive 37 blocks, while being named All-State honorable mention by the Denver Post.

Shannon Kelly of Pine Creek High School and Rampart High School guard Michelle Brassard may provide significant output from outside the arc as the two averaged double figures in scoring last season, with Brassard and Kelly finishing with 12.8 and 10.1 points per game, respectively.

And, as if the high offensive production of new players couldn’t, seemingly, look any brighter for the lady Mountain Lions, they also received letters of intent from Estancia High School guard Kassie Stratton and Westwood High School forward Sierra Henry. Stratton dominated the Orange Coast League after averaging 16 points, six rebounds, three steals and two assists per game, where she was also named Most Valuable Player of the OCL. Henry averaged 13.9 points per game while also recording 5.8 rebounds per game The future looks bright for UCCS basketball as the summer and off-season preparations begin to take effect for both teams, who officially begin play in November. S

May 10 to May 16, 2011

Photo Courtesy of gomountainlions.com

California native, Kyle Clark, signed a national letter of intent with UCCS in April.

The 6-foot, 11-inch forward may bring a domintating presence down low next season.

RMAC expects to extend conference in 2012

While this move isn’t going to save a bundle, the a trip back from Las Vegas one time. So very unsafe move is still a success for Mountain Lion staff consid- travel [is something] that we don’t do.” acramer@uccs.edu ering UCCS will not be spending more than they did While things may have worked out well, overall, with Nebraska-Kearny in the conference. The number UCCS will still have to wait for cross town foe ColoThe last 12 months have seen big time college athletics of miles traveled with the addition of Black Hills works rado College to someday rejoin the RMAC. CC was shake up conference alignments from top to bottom at out to be an estimated 50 miles fewer on UCCS men’s extended a bid to the RMAC with a May 15 deadline the Division I level and whether those changes will bet- basketball bus trips alone. to accept. However, as the deadline approaches this ter the landscape of college athletics, however, remains “It’s really going to be very similar for a lot of our Sunday it seems less likely they will accept with every to be seen. sports, especially the sports that have travel partners. passing day.

The Rocky Mountain Athletic Conference recently The reason being, traditionally the Kearney/Chadron Colorado College along with CU-Boulder, CSUdecided to get in on the act with it’s all but certain ad- road trip is basically going to be the Chadron/Black Fort Collins and Colorado School of Mines made up dition of Black Hills State (South Dakota) for the 2012- Hills road trip now,” said Associate Athletic Director the original “Colorado Faculty Athletic Conference” 13 academic year. This moves comes after long time Nathan Gibson. “Overall, it’s going to save us a little just before it became today’s RMAC in 1967. S RMAC member, Nebraska-Kearney, decided to bolt for bit of money just because it’s the Mid-America Intercollegiate Athletic Association less miles between when you in an effort to save on compare the two travel costs following road trips.”

2011-12.

Besides savUnlike big time coling money for lege football where scholarships, Full Time Summer Position Available for teams disregard travel UCCS has even Competitive and Hard Working Students costs, such as TCU more pressing joining the Big East, concerns when Division II athletic proit comes to athAre you looking for a fun and challenging postion that is grams are often making letics, namely, ideal for college students who would like experience in moves that are more fisafety. completing group projects, budget management, nancially sound. After “Our number all, less money spent on one concern is effective marketing, and customer service? Then College travel is more money safe travel,” said Pro Painters is the place for you! We are looking to hire Image courtesy of lopers.info that can be used elseKirkham, who across Colorado, so here is your opportunity to work where. was a long time “Scholarships are the number one predictor for suc- women’s basketball coach at outdoors with other like-minded individuals while cess in Division II athletics,” said UCCS Athletic Di- Mesa State. “I actually went earning a good hourly wage! rector Steve Kirkham. “Look at our conference; Adams off the road and hit a reflector Apply at: State gives the most in track and cross country and they that tore the review mirror off http://www1.collegepro.com/students/Painter_Application/sb.cn dominate; Metro State gives the most in basketball and the van and went through the they dominate. You can just go right down the line.” window into the back seat, on

Alex Cramer

opinion

Your lack of awareness will be the death of us May 10 to May 16, 2011

Jessica Lynch jlynch@uccs.edu A few days ago I went to Panera with hopes of getting some work done in an environment less stuffy and more eventful than the library. I was by myself and in no mood to either talk with or overhear anyone else’s conversation. Although it was fairly busy, I imagined that some light tunes from Pandora would easily block out the distracting noise. I did not, however, realize that I was about to be immersed in the most graphic, nauseating conversation my less than virgin ears had ever heard.

There was only so much my Sia radio station could do to combat the horrors without also stripping me of my hearing.

To back track a little bit, I have a habit of disclosing too much information.

Sometimes it makes people uncomfortable, but usually, it just makes me seem more personable, I think. I rarely hold back and if I think something, well, you’re probably going to hear all about it. For the most part I am neither afraid to be brutally honest or speak my mind.

Believe me when I say that I never used to be like this; rather, I was shy and a little uncomfortable with

myself all through grade school and high school.

Then something magical happened and I grew up a lot my first year of college. I became confident, a little weird and totally okay with it.

And so, to my parents’ dismay, I’ll pretty much talk to you about anything and everything.

Now, with this said, as much as I traipse back and forth over the line of inappropriateness, even I have my limits.

So, when I heard two girls that neither looked nor acted any older than 16, loudly gossiping about black chicks getting knocked up, cheating wives and disturbing bathroom hookups, I nearly choked on my sandwich.

Actually, I kind of wish I had, because then maybe they would have at least paused in the middle of their story about a condom that slipped off, to watch me suffocate.

Even though I hate “Jersey Shore” I wish they had been role playing rather than discussing real life.

By the end of their detailed descriptions I felt like I too may have contracted an STD while being four months pregnant with my crack baby.

My poor, imaginary, unborn child doesn’t stand a chance now.

Their story was overflowing with diseases, bodily fluids and everything else that will undoubtedly send one to Hell. The fact that it was far too much information for me is really saying something.

The whole experience made me want to go take

a shower while listening to Christian radio and reciting bible verses. I’m definitely going to church next Sunday. And I’m never kissing a boy or having a sip of alcohol, again!

And then it got me thinking. Should I really be complaining because these poor things with an affinity for “like” and “sucks” just made me feel like a rock star in comparison?

Probably not.

However, this realization aside, it did make me re-think some of the things I’ve said in the past.

It made me think about the times I’ve shared too much. Had I ever made someone wish they owned more than a metaphorical pair of ear muffs?

It actually made me feel a little guilty. I started to second guess myself a little bit. I became concerned that maybe I was as disgusting as these two horny, pre-pubescent teens.

But then, reality hit me and I proudly whispered to myself, “No way, I’m awesome!”

Still, I think there’s something to be learned from this oh-God-shedid-what-event.

For one, there is a time and place for most conversations. If you want to tell your friend every single gruesome detail of a night that shouldn’t have happened in the first place, please, do it in your car, or in a dark alley in Mexico. If neither of these locations are a possibility for you, be a champ and swallow it. Your pride, I meant; you should swallow that. S

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Page 13

Why we need Donald Trump for President. No, really.

Comic by Arno

Stephen Farrell sfarrell@uccs.edu Donald Trump for president? Sounds like one of the best ideas I’ve heard in a very long time. And apparently I’m not the only one who thinks so, because according to the most recent Public Policy Polling poll, it’s a very real possibility. As of last week Trump lead the race at 26 percent, beating Mike Huckabee by 9 percentage points. The most amazing part is that he hasn’t even done anything yet; he hasn’t even announced he’s running. Still, all of that aside, I personally believe that Donald Trump would make a great president.

One major problem that I have with current politicians is that while they claim to “serve” the public, they rarely do. Most of them are phony, will say whatever they can to gain power and to no one’s real surprise end up being corrupt.

The politicians I respect are those who view themselves as public servants.

Unfortunately, very few politicians on Capitial Hill demonstrate selfless behavior, but rather, are merely career politicians.

I think the majority of citizens can agree that it is extremely rare to find a politician who has nothing

to gain from his or her success in politics. Rarely, is there someone whose personal success does not depend on political advancement. Well, until now, that is.

Trump not only has nothing to gain financially (as his net worth is already in the billions many times over), but also has nothing to gain reputation wise, either. He is already immensely popular around the world, has a fan base in the millions with people who love and respect him as an integral patriot and businessman and has the number one reality show on prime time television.

For Mr. Trump, holding a political office would be exactly what it was meant to be. He would view it as a public service, and nothing more. With a salary cut down to a measly $400,000 and a high likelihood that his already infamously bad blonde hair will go white, Mr. Trump would be doing himself no favors by being elected President of the United States. Sadly, the same cannot be said for the current president in office, and even many of his predecessors for that matter.

Other politicians know this, and believe me when I say that they fear it and dread the very thought of it. The majority of both Republicans and Democrats alike see politics as

their bread and butter, and not so much as a platform for service for us as citizens. So, naturally, when someone who actually fits the mold of a servant (like Trump) stands a very real chance at crushing them at their own game, they view him as a threat. Because of this they will take every opportunity to cut him down and make him seem less credible. These people want career politicians running this country, not those with candor and common sense.

Granted, whileTrump has come under recent fire for criticizing President Obama on his birth certificate, he is still glad the issue has been resolved. However, while I believe Trump would be a reputable president, with Obama’s recent overseeing of Osama bin Laden’s death, his work is definitely cut out for him if he decides to run for office.

In an unforgiving political environment where just about anything someone says can be construed as “politically incorrect,” it is a relief that someone like Trump had the bronze to question the President’s origin of birth. This type of audacity gets things done.

At this point in time, politicians have lacked qualities like boldness and frankness. Trump, fortunately, changes all of that. S

opinion

Page 14

You can’t learn if you don’t ask

Cherise Fantus cfantus@uccs.edu Political correctness. It’s been covered, argued and hammered into our brains for years. While I think the idea is good on paper (Don’t say things that will hurt others), the practice has become somewhat askew.

There are so many reasons I disagree with the idea of being “politically correct,” not the least of

which is the loss of the opportunity to broaden our horizons.

We are so afraid of offending one another that we forget to learn about each other. We’re afraid to ask the important questions.

Since society has deemed only certain terms for certain groups to be acceptable, and those terms seem to be constantly fluid, most people are never quite sure what they can or cannot say.

For example, I’ve been using the term “homosexual,” which was the politically correct term awhile back, but I recently learned that the politically correct term is now “gay.” While I wasn’t intending to offend, according to society, my mistake is offensive.

The very unfortunate

fact about that is that people are afraid to talk about race, sexual orientation, religion, culture or any other sensitive topic because they are afraid that they might use the wrong terminology and hurt someone’s feelings.

When people are afraid to talk about those subjects, they aren’t able to engage in meaningful conversations about them, and miss out on learning about people who are different from themselves.

Most people are proud of the things that make them who they are, such as their cultures and their religions. Also, people love to talk about themselves. When you aren’t afraid to ask about who a person is or what their culture is like, you are open to learn not only about that person, but

DEAR DEVI US DU Dear Clueless Copulator, You are leading her on. The fact that you don’t have any feelings for you, and she seems to have some for you means you need to be honest with her. Immediately.

Women don’t separate emotion from sex the way men do. The fact that she is fooling around with you now that you both are single means she’s into you. The more you keep fooling around with her, the more into you she’s going to get, and she’s going to get her heart broken. Since you seem to still care about her, I’m guessing you don’t want that to happen.

The best thing you can do is talk to her. Tell her you care about her, but don’t have those feelings anymore. Let her know that you didn’t want to hurt her, so you let her know as soon as you realized your feelings had changed. She’ll probably still be a little hurt and mad for awhile, but she’ll quickly get over it. When she’s done hating you after two weeks, you can be friends with her again.

The worst thing you can do is not talk to her and keep the fling going. She will inevitably get hurt. When she finds out (and she will) how you led her on and kept using her for sex even though you didn’t have feelings for her, she will be slightly more than mad for awhile. No, she will hate your guts – and not just for a little while – for a long, long while, maybe the rest of your natural born life. She will probably hunt you down and rip your face off. Then she will laugh maniacally while she pees on it and then makes you eat it.

Clearly, your best bet is to be honest. She can keep her sanity and her dignity, and you can keep your face intact. It’s a win-win situation (or as win-win as it can be at this point).

-Cherise Fantus

about a culture that is not your own.

Of course, there is a chance you might use the wrong terminology and offend that person. That’s okay. They will surely correct you. And guess what? You’ve already learned something. After you clear that hurdle, you will be able to gain so much more from the experience.

Most people tend to be pretty understanding if you make a mistake.

Obviously, if you are intentionally using a term because you know its offensive and you want to hurt someone, it is going to accomplish exactly that. If you innocently refer to someone as homosexual when they prefer the term gay, they will be far more understanding of your mistake if you are willing to adapt. The

May 10 to May 16, 2011

important thing is having that open conversation.

If, however, they are hell-bent on being offended no matter how good your intentions, they are probably just a difficult person and not worth your time, anyway.

There will always be people who are offended by certain terms. Some even find the “politically correct” terms offensive.

There will never be a way to please everyone, certainly not a one-sizefits-all term for an entire group of people. While you may belong to that group, you are still an individual, and it is up to you – not society – to decide how you want to identify yourself. And it is up to the rest of us to learn about each other and not fall into the trap of generic labeling.

While I’m not saying

to just forget about everyone’s feelings and just say what you want, I am saying that you shouldn’t be afraid to talk about things like race and religion just because you don’t know the right thing to say. Risk saying the wrong thing if that means you can learn something about that group or that individual.

College is the place to broaden our horizons.

Instead of being scared of one another, we should be learning about each other. Once we break down the barriers of politically correct speech, we will open an avenue for conversation. Instead of avoiding each other to risk offense, we should talk about it and become a real community. A community full of people with mutual respect and understanding. S

Dear Devious Duo,

A couple years ago, I would always flirt with a friend of mine.

It was harmless, though genuine, because we were both in relationships and saw no sign of an end for either of us. Well, now we’re both single and have been talking for a month or so…and it just hit me that I don’t like her the same way I used to, both because of changed emotions and the fact that she lives in a different city. We’ve fooled around a little already, but I don’t want to seem like I led her on. What do I do?

The best thing you can do is be honest with her. The fact that you feel guilty is a good thing and something she will appreciate and respect about you.

Whatever you do, however, don’t wait; talk to her about this immediately.

Don’t continue to see her and text her if you know this has no future. And good Lord Almighty do not drunk dial or text her because you will most likely invite her over and good things never happen after 2 a.m.

Okay, that was a total lie. Only awesome things happen in the wee hours of the morning, but for this scenario, try to go to bed alone.

Now, let’s be real, the chances of you being drunk sometime in the next two weeks are great. The chances of you forgetting your pledge to leave her alone when you’re inebriated are even greater. Because of this, you need a plan.

Before becoming completely tanked, try giving your phone to a friend or shutting it off for the night. If this is impossible and you’re as connected to your phone as a mother is to her newborn child, then you’ll need a few other options.

Let’s say you text her. While it might be something casual like, “Hey, hope you’re doing well,” it will most likely come across like you’re interested and will send all the wrong signals. If she is as into you as you let on, your text might be all the motivation she needs to make the trip to see you.

If you know she’s that type of girl, don’t shower. Smell bad, don’t brush your hair or teeth and when you see her, drape your pit stained arms around her body for a tight squeeze. Let out a big sigh of relief so she can experience the full wrath of your rank breath. Tell her you’ve been drinking your own piss. If she doesn’t believe you, really drink it.

After this charade she will think you are the most disgusting person on the planet and will no longer be interested. Problem solved!

-Jessica Lynch

Have a question about relationships, love or...sex? Email your query to the Devious Duo at scribeonsex@gmail.com.

the

Scribble

“Still, if a statement cannot reasonably be interpreted to be one of express or implied fact, it cannot be libelous. This means that humor columns, spoofs, cartoons and satire are protected as long as readers understand that the material is not intended to be taken seriously.”

-Student Press Law Center

VAPA to implement coloring books Stephen Farrell sfarrell@uccs.edu In an effort to maintain creative edge in the VAPA (Visual and Performing Arts) department at UCCS, students will be issued coloring books for their final exams. According to department heads, this move is aimed to “ensure that artistic integrity is not being diminished.”.

In a recent interview with one VAPA student, Shirley Simon, the following account was given, “I know you may think that it sounds funny, the whole coloring book thing, but how well can you stay in the lines? Yeah, exactly what I thought, so I really don’t want

to hear it, okay?” After Simon’s brief take on the issue, the interview ended as the jaw-dropped staff member of The Scribe who conducted the interview was left speechless and unsure what to say next.

The move to implement coloring books into the VAPA department’s curriculum comes as an “improvement” of sorts after studies in various universities nation-wide have concluded that coloring books do indeed stimulate the artistic side of the brain.

As one 5-year Harvard study put it, “If they can dodge a wrench, they can dodge a ball.” No one at The Scribe has been able to decipher what exactly that quote means but, nevertheless, we trust

The news in brief UCCS chooses new mascot after Boomer costume is stolen

This week UCCS was forced to choose a new mascot when Boomer went missing after a major sporting event. After much debate, UCCS decided to go with the Fighting Fairies.

Sadly, all of the sports teams were disappointed in UCCS’s choice and left the school this week in frustration. The good news is that the new mascot picked up two new sports: synchronized swimming and chess. Since the new additions, UCCS has picked up first place in both events nationwide.

On the downside, many people are leaving UCCS because they refuse to wear pink fairy wings at sporting events.

S

Students skip studying for slip and slide fun

An accidental spill of butter on the floor of the Lodge took students on an epic journey on Monday. What at first appeared to be a dilemma turned into a day of fun and procrastination. The spill prompted students to steal all the butter from the Lodge and coat a dorm hallway with it. They then began reenacting Risky Business. Although studying for tests could have been beneficial, it would not have been as fun. By afternoon, students from other dorms headed into Breckenridge Hall, where the madness began and they joined in the fun. After hitting their heads on the floor, students woke up thinking of rainbows and cupcakes.

S

Beer taps will make class more interesting in the fall UCCS will be installing beer taps next to all water fountains this summer. In an effort to make the school more studentfriendly and comfortable, they are making several additions, to include the game/recreation area in the UC and these new beer taps. “We figure that most students come to school drunk or hungover, anyway, so why don’t we make this a school where students can enjoy themselves out in the open?” commented Chancellor Pat Shocker-Zanzabar.

The beer machines will offer a choice of Coors or Coors Light, and will be the same price as the fountain sodas in the Overlook Café.

S

Osama Bin Laden rises from dead, zombie apocalypse upon us

The zombie apocalypse may be upon us. After being killed

by Navy Seals on May 1, Osama Bin Laden has come back as a zombie. The terrorist rose from the dead one week after his death and has been steadily consuming victims since. He started by chewing the face off the guard in charge of watching his body. Then he moved on to the general population, which is rapidly becoming more zombie than human. To stop the spread of zombies to the rest of the world, world leaders are proposing sealing off the entire Middle East, where it is spreading rapidly.

-Scribe Staff

the academic integrity of the study.

Other universities that have made a similar switch to coloring books in place of final projects include: Harvard, Cornell, Northwestern, UCLA, UC Berkeley, Duke University and Chuck E. Cheese’s. Apologies for that last one as it is not a university, but rumor has it they will soon be requiring it of children who run out of tokens and wish to continue playing Hungry, Hungry Hippos.

One thing is certain, however, you do not want to criticize this new VAPA move in the presence of a VAPA student, as our staff Photo courtesy of daddytypes.com member (for now wishing to remain unnamed) who interviewed Everyone loves coloring books. I collected them when I was a one and left covered in acrylics. S kid. Had, like, dozens. ...It was so lonely.

TOP TEN

Summer internships to guarantee a winning life

10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

Termite research assistant

Cricket farm hand

Baby camel feeder

Seagull chaser

Bologna maker

Goose down plucker

Diaper cleaner

Turkey inseminator

Maggot farm hand

Mom pleaser

-Scribe Staff

Scribe Shutdown

worthy. After hours of puzzling over stories, the staff decided they’d rather throw paper airplanes at each other than be productive.

It was then the dam broke. Paper airplanes filled the office as the editors improvised a Star Wars-like battle complete with imaginary light sabers. After a day filled with absolutely nothing, the Scribers gave up and decided to close down The Scribe because they felt like pathetic failures.

They have since turned the office lights off and locked the door This week the staff has been seen wondering hopelessly around campus sporting dark bags under their eyes, due to the lack of sleep that comes with writers block. Several staff members have been seen in the UC asking questions such as, “Where am I?” and “Can I interview you?”

All have received looks of confusion due to the deranged state of the reporters and photographers. As of now it is unclear if The Scribe will reopen for the last weeks of the spring semester. S

Marguerite Breeden mbreeden@uccs.edu After 24 hours of writer’s block, The Scribe has decided to shut its doors.

Last week at a meeting the frustrated Scribe staff struggled to put together a paper due to the lack of campus activity and copious amounts of homework, which turned their brains into a papier-mâché-like mush.

Things began to get out of hand when the Editorin-Chief, in her crazed state, began to line the office with sticky notes. She was heard singing about fondness for cats. Irritated, the managing editor threw a pen at the Editorin-Chief and knocked her to the ground as she let out the loudest and most ferocious cat noise known to man. In response, the sports editor replied “I’m King of the world!” as he jumped from the floor onto the desk.

While all this took place, the staff impatiently struggled to find stories to cover, many of which turned out to have been covered previously or were simply not news-