September 2012 Issue

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September 2012

COGNITION MAGAZINE

t h n t e u Yo werm o p Em Issue

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Basic Foods. See how they can help you LIVE LONGER & healthier…

DEPRESSION

Anthony Bean: Talks Talented Youth & Theatre

What Blacks Should Know

KIM DILOSA: New Orleans Teen Advocate speaks on “TEENZ” in HER CITY

Back to School Fitness for PARENTS

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CONTRIBUTING

Writers Darrin L. Harris Deanna Theriot Dr. Ada C. Roberson Shawniece “QB� McMillan Lyiena McMillain Gentelle Pedescleaux

For Advertising Information contact

Founder/CHIEF EDITOR Malcolm M. Armstrong Jr. Cognition Magazine, LLC is a thought provoking digital magazine dedicated to the new age mind, body, and soul of black America with emphasis on wellness and psychological well being. Cognition Magazine touches on subjects that we all can relate to such as Love & Relationships, Health & Fitness, Entertainment, and Travel & Leisure. The goal of this magazine is to highlight the significant thoughts and mental strategies used in all of our daily activities and life events. Cognition Magazine is intended to be a publication that exposes our thoughts and innermost feelings on various topics that appeal to the African American community. Cognition Magazine is distributed monthly and is

available in digital format.

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Cognition Magazine, LLC Phone: (504) 208-0704 Email: advertising@cognitionmagazine.com

Website: www.cognitionmagazine.com

Reproduction of any part of this publication without the express written consent of the publisher is strictly prohibited, Cognition Magazine is a product of Cognition Magazine, LLC . The information within this publication is believed to be accurate but Cognition Magazine does not guarantee accuracy. Cognition Magazine, LLC will not be held responsible for the quality or performance of goods and services provided by advertisers or any other portion of this publication.


CONTENTS

4 Editors Note 6 Entertainment & Fashion 14 “Be for Real”

16 Ask Dr. Ada Cover Story Anthony Bean and his influence on our YOUTH through theatre

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Featured Articles: 10 Essence Music Festival Artist Recaps New Orleans Youth 18 Advocate Kim Dilosa speaks on OUR teens.

22 Health & Fitness 28 What blacks should know: Depression 35 Love & Relationships

Thoughts after Dark w/ QB

37 Be Inspired: “The Squeeze”

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From the Editor

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e at Cognition Magazine have taken the month of August off for some much needed reflection and organizational growth. During this time of reflection and restructuring we found ourselves in the midst of summer in New Orleans and covering a lot of issues concerning our youth and young adults. It was only befitting to deem this September our “Youth Empowerment” issue. There are so many community leaders within this wonderful city but the two we have chosen to feature in this issue are truly submerged in the care for our youth with SELFLESS efforts. Even I have learned a few things and I grew up in New Orleans. Apart from our youth involvement, we have made some changes with our publication and if I had to give these past two months a theme it would be “Scale back to launch forward.” This magazine has been a challenge financially and personally but still we have a message to convey and that is nothing but making YOU think about YOU in all aspects: Mentally Physically and Spiritually. We are different from other publications in that we are concerned about the wellness of our viewers from a proactive standpoint. If you agree with us and are interested in our theme, support us, provide us any feedback and any assistance possible. We are here for you and life is always good to those who live it with purpose! Think Mind, Think Body...Think YOU! Yours in #WELLNESS,

Malcol

Malcolm M. Armstrong Jr. Founder & Chief Editor marmstrong@cognitionmagazine.com Follow us on twitter: @cognition_mag

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Entertainment & Fashion

Evelyn Lozada Drops Divorce papers

Sherman Hensley, best Actor

known for his work as George Jefferson on the television show "The Jefferson's," passed away on July 24th. he was 74 years old. Sherman started out on "All in the Family." He was rewarded his own spin off show "The Jefferson's" after 2 seasons. The Jefferson's went on an 11 season run before ending. He later played on the television show "Amen." Hemsley was hilarious at his best. I remember watching "The Jefferson's" as a little girl. George Jefferson was the first Black, successful, rich, businessman on TV and he was married to a Black woman. That's the DREAM right there. After watching the Sanford and Sons and the James Evans on "Good Times," it was good to see a Black family that finally got a piece of the pie. The show's theme song "Moving on Up" says it all.

Happily ever after OR NOT!!! After the violent events resulting from an altercation between married couple Football Player Chad

More Twitter Beef Rasheeda VS K. Michelle

“Ochocinco� Johnson & reality TV star As I watched the episode of Love and Hip Evelyn Lozada, Evelyn signed a petition for divorce in the state of Florida on August 14th 2012. The couple have only been married since July 4th 2012. Does anything last nowadays smh?

K. Michelle

Hop ATL when first told her story of fomer Jive ANR Memphitz beating her

Rasheeda

to , I wondered what was going on. "This has to be fake," I thought. I only got that thought because I know that Rasheeda is good friend with Memphitz's Wife Toya Wright. "Some friend she is," I thought. Well, maybe I was wrong. Apparently, Rasheeda is on Toya and Memphitz's side. Word on the street is the 2 ladies got into a huge altercation on the reunion show, when Rasheeda questioned K.Michelle's story of having been beat by Memphitz. The two had a spat on Twitter yesterday. Rasheeda says K. Michelle is self destructing and has no man and no friends. Check out the Tweets

Lyiena or La from A Dose of LA gives you the news with a twist for Cogntion Mag. Not only does she bring you the news to keep you informed, but she writes pieces to inspire and uplift her readers. She's a Writer, Rapper, Blogger, Public Speaker and a Socialite. You can catch her at a hip hop show, promoting events, updating blogs, volunteering in her church and evangelizing in the community. Follow her on Twitter @lanino_brown Intel courtesy of : adoseofla.blogspot.com 6


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***HAPPY WHO DAT SEASON *** FROM MISS BEHAVIN’ BOUTIQUE

VISIT US FOR YOUR “WHO DAT DIVA” APPAREL 8


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ESSENCE MUSIC FESTVAL 2012 New Orleans, Louisiana

COVERAGE Part

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ESSENCE MUSIC FESTIVAL NIGHT ONE 1) Kindred the Family Soul shows off their HOTT KICKS in press room. 2) Comedian/Actor Kevin Hart made a special appearance and did a lil booty shaking for his birthday night on stage. 3) SWV member “LeLee” dances while they perform in the Ford ® Superlounge. 4) “Taj” of SWV sings rocking some cool glasses and free flowing hair. 5) Charlie Wilson gives bright and vibrant performance on the Mainstage. 6) “CoKo” sings sweetly in Ford® Superlounge

7) Nephew Tommy on Mainstage. 8) Charlie Wilson performs looking sharp as usual. 9) New mother and songstress Goapele accompanied by the queen Mary J. Blige. 10) “LeLee” from SWV savors the melody as “CoKo” sings their rendition of Patti Labelle’s “If Only You Knew.” 11) Charlie Wilson AKA “Uncle Charlie” drives the crowd wild on the mainstage. 12) Kevin Hart takes over for a few during an impromptu appearance. 13) Heartthrob Trey Songz shows his swag on Mainstage. 11

14) The ladies of “SWV” graces the press room for photos and Q&A. 15) A relaxed Marsha Ambrosius comes in the press room. 16) Kindred the Family Soul shows us their new style. 17) Cognition Magazine prompts Kindred the Family Soul’s husband and wife duo Fatin & Aja to grace us with a sweet kissing photo op.


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ESSENCE MUSIC FESTIVAL NIGHT TWO 1) New Orleans own all female brass band the Original Pinettes comes for Q&A in the press room. 2) Big Sam from Big Sams Funky Nation 3) Mc Lyte looking graceful in EMF press room. 4) Gospel group sensation Mary Mary comes in press room after their Mainstage performance. 5) Lioness Teedra Moses performs in ith Mc Donalds速 Superloungs. 6) The Stylistics pose for the Cognition Mag cameras after their performance in the Verizon速 Wireless Lounge

7) Teedra Moses laughs during press room interviews. 8) The Stylistics do Q&A in the EMF press room. 9) Mary Mary poses with expecting member Tina Campbell. 10) A humble Kenny Lattimore interviews in press room. 11) A vibrant Charlie Wilson tells us about how he stays in the game with the youngsters and his new line of hats. Teedra Moses gives a sensual performance in the Mc Donalds速 superlonge.

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13) Member of the City Gym Boys poses for EMF press. 14) Charlie Wilson tells the press room about his performance the previous night. 15) Raheem Devaughn does pictures and Q&A in the EMF press room in hip hop attire. 16) The healthy but sexy City Gym Boys promote their 2013 calendar and mentorship program.


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ESSENCE MUSIC FESTIVAL NIGHT THREE 1) Chaka Khan asks “What you Gonna Do for Me?” on Mainstage. 2) Eve sports a tie dye dress in EMF press room. 3) Singer Melanie Fiona hits the press room after her McDonalds® Superlounge performance. 4) Comedic duo Trey Songz and Kevin Hart works the press room. 5) The one and only Aretha Franklin performs on Mainstage. 6) R&B Diva Syleena Johnson performs on the Mainstage in an Grecian inspired outfit. 7) Aretha Franklin receives an accolade from Louisiana Secretary of State Jay Dardenne. 8) Aretha Franklin & Essence’s Chief Editor Constance White.

9) Eve looking bright and fabulous for photos and Q&A. 10) R&B Divas cast members Monifah & KeKe Wyatt show a bit of drama. 11) Monifah sings a soulful tribute on Mainstage. 12) Aretha Franklin works the Mainstage in beautiful flowing orange gown. 13) R&B sensation Carl Thomas rocks the crowd in the McDonalds® Superlounge. 14) Sylenna Johnson sings tribute on EMF Mainstage. 15) Carl Thomas sings hit “Emotional” and crowd goes wild. 16) A relaxed Melanie Fiona poses for Cognition Magazine press. 17) The full cast of new reality show R&B Divas. 13

18) Trey Songz and Kevin Hart rock random poses in press room. 19) Eve rocks some seriously fierce kicks. 20) Spoken Word artist Sunni Patterson hosts the McDonalds ® Superlounge. 21) Chaka Khan amazes viewers with her new figure on Mainstage. 22) Monifah and KeKe Wyatt does Q&A. 23) A glowing Eve Marcille graces the press room. 24) Nicci Gilbert of R&B Divas reality show performs the EMF Mainstage. 25) The full cast of R&B Divas in EMF press room. 26) Aretha Franklin poses in relaxed attire after her Mainstage performance.


REALITY & THE BLACK WOMAN

Be for Real

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production to me. I guess this survey would better depict the reasons why his plays/movies are so popular than the current state of black womanhood in o I'm doing my thug America. The black women who have made him quite thizzle at 8AM, wealthy (who, in spite of the fact that they have a hard reading the news first thing in time paying their bills, have the disposable income to the morning (because my iPod do so) enjoy taking two-hour mini-vacations into refuses to let me get out of bed fantastical lands where black men are throwing until I do) and I come across a themselves at black women's feet and drastically Washington Post article changing their lives for the better in the process. These pertaining to a purportedly "extensive" survey same women, who pour their efforts into maintaining conducted by the aforementioned party and the Kaiser their physical appearance and demanding work/social/ Family Foundation. family lives, are knee deep in the church praying for a man while they deny their desire to be in a committed http://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/surveyrelationship in order to save face. paints-portrait-of-black-women-inamerica/2011/12/22/gIQAvxFcJQ_story.html I can dig it, girls. No one wants to admit how disheartening it is to think that most of us black Overall I found the results of survey to be like most women (most of us with goals anyway) might "end other studies of that genre and that is overgeneralized. up" man-less because either there just aren't enough Yes we can see here what most of a SAMPLE of black men to go around or worse that they don't really black women think about very specific criterion on a want us (black women) anyway. It's a dismal view to decidedly liner scale in comparison to their black have of black on black romance when everywhere you male, white female, and white male fellows but...eh. turn other races seem to have no problem "sticking Why be impressed by the findings of such conditional together" in matters of love and as black women we're research? Some of their findings did jump out at me left to wonder "Well, Brotha what the hell is wrong like these: with us?" (I personally think it's sad that the black race in this country will eventually die out but this is the "... a complex portrait emerges of black women who ebb 'n' flow of things. We had a good run, right? Bout feel confident but vulnerable, who have high 250 years of slavery. About 100 years of brutal self-esteem and see physical beauty as important, who racism. Then roughly 40 years of passive-aggressive find career success more vital to them than marriage." discrimination. That's a solid record for any minority in this country. They just killed off all the Natives.) "Religion is essential to most black women’s lives; being in a romantic relationship is not, the poll shows."

As for this black woman, I've never really been interested in the whole marriage thing but that's because I've seen what little it can do to improve the overall quality of person's life; not because I'm more interested in having a successful career and "getting "Nearly three-quarters of African American women saved" than I am in romance. As far as simply being say now is a good time to be a black woman in Amer- involved in a committed relationship (sans contract), I ica, and yet a similar proportion worry about having could probably swing one if a viable opportunity enough money to pay their bills." presented itself... but so far none have. Does it bother me? Sometimes. Mostly when I wanna bone but truthfully it does get hard every now and then to toil "Eighty-five percent say they are satisfied with their land all by one's self. There may be some shame own lives, but one-fifth say they are often treated with involved in admitting this, but most of my apathy less respect than other people." toward finding a working relationship with a black man (or any) comes from my belief that it's something Honestly the whole thing read like a Tyler Perry a out of my reach. My motto is: Why waste time 14


missing something I've never had? That shit would just drive me crazy with loneliness and who needs that kinda stress when the bills are due? I might just be postulating here, but I think many of the (heterosexual) black women participating in this survey might have felt similarly about the specter of having a loving, successful and long-lasting marriage. With that in mind, many have decided that it would be much more advantageous to seek fulfillment elsewhere (religion, career, family). Meanwhile... Tyler Perry capitalizes on the black woman's suppressed yearning for "the one with the ring" who'll love her for a lifetime.

consumer-driven lifestyles we might have been denied in prior eras. We don't even need a real job to live well anymore--just behave like children with high-limit credit cards and short tempers on national television and fame and fortune will follow. America is LOVING us for that shit right now. We don't have to play maids and hookers and ignorant welfare queens to get roles in major motion pictures (but if we want an award, those roles are probably your best bet) because Tyler Perry lets us be whatever we want to be in HIS movies. First Harriet Tubman and now this Negro. We's free nah...

*VOMIT INTERMISSION* (I'll wait til you get back. I might be a minute my damn self.)

There may be plenty of other black women who feel similarly about these things that I do but such nuances weren't covered in their "extensive" survey. They just asked separately about the overall importance of certain aspects of one's life such as being married, having children, being successful in one's career, and religion and drew comparative conclusions based on those results. This survey all by itself doesn't quite delve into the reasoning behind the responses given, but no research method is perfect by any means. The quantitative intent of a survey is to get a broad-sweeping general view of a particular demographic which is exactly what we see here: The Reasons Why Black Women Love Tyler Perry.

(Jesus... what did I eat?) *RESUME WAIL* Regardless of black women appearing to have something of a disinterest in romance, the survey shows that we feel like now is a good time to be a black woman in America... As unsound as the foundations of this "truth" may be, it is what it is. (I say considering what we've had to endure the whole while we've inhabited this country, that's a dumb ass question to even put on a survey. This shit beats the hell out of working in fields and kitchens with no agency whatsoever over our sexuality. Comparatively speaking... this is the shit right now.) Before this "age of Michelle Obama,� what were we as black women really given to look forward to? Now, not only do we have a sophisticated, intelligent, fine specimen of black womanhood as a first lady, but also our brethren rapping and singing our praises in songs about "independent women" and "bad bitches" where we are lauded for our ability to strip our way through college. We have successful TV series dedicated entirely to glamorizing the emotional immaturity and materialism supposedly inherent of our demographic. And what's more, we have the likes of Tyler Perry around to stroke our egos and make us feel as though we can do little to no wrong. All is well for black women. We don't have to be ashamed of the fact that so many of us feel compelled to use our bodies as a commodity just to earn a livable wage or simply live the

Of course I had to SEE this survey for myself since it's so telling of the black female state of affairs in this country. You can do the same here and see where you fall in as a black/white man/woman http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/special/ nation/black-women-in-america/ ~Deanna Theriot

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Ask Dr. Ada

Dr. Ada, I feel like I have to offer a lot in a relationship but I seem to end up with men that only want sex. Lets not get it twisted, sex is good to me but I want more. I do not dress provocatively and neither do I have that personality. How do I find a mate that’s willing to give me more than just sex? ~Constance Constance,

B

e clear about what you want in a relationship, and don’t settle for less. In other words, communicate with potential suitors your expectations of a relationship in the beginning stages of courtship so that there won’t be any confusion about what you want and need from them. It is important that once you say that you don’t want to just be the “booty call”, you don’t allow yourself to become the booty call. So often, we begin relationships with ideas of what we want, get involved with someone who we know is not what we want, spend lots of time trying to make them into what we want, getting upset because they aren’t who we want them to be, and then wondering why we aren’t getting the things that we want out of a relationship. Does this sound familiar? You may also want to consider the circumstances under which you meet these guys. Change things up a bit and expand your dating pool by getting involved in activities in which you meet different types of people. You can try joining an adult recreational league, church groups, groups for young professionals, dating websites (make sure they’re reputable), or you can ask a friend to hook you up with one of their single friends who may meet your criteria. The important thing to remember is that, if you find yourself having the same results over and over again, it is time to try something different.

If you find yourself having the same results over and over again, it is time to try something different

My "grown-up" coworkers need attention and I’m sick of doing what their parents should have done a long time ago. Between the loud outbursts and unnecessary comments, I think I'm going to loose it. Can I have some advice on how to deal with these silly ass attention seeking behaviors? ~Sir 504 Sir 504,

A

ccept the things that you can’t change, and change the things that you can. You can’t make someone behave the way you want them to, but you can control your responses to them. There are several things that you may want to try. First, you might want to speak with your co-worker about how their behavior is affecting you. If you choose to do this, it is important that you are non-confrontational, and that you don’t judge their behavior as “good or bad, right or wrong”, but instead address how you are affected by it. You can also try bringing head phones to work to block out the noisiness or you may want to remove yourself from your co-worker’s presence when they are acting out. Finally, if all else fails, it may be necessary to seek the counsel of your supervisor. 16


Dee,

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on’t be so hard on yourself. The loss of a relationship is often very difficult to handle. It

Ask Dr. Ada

Dr. Ada I just ended a 3 year relationship and I KNOW I made the right decision but I keep getting angry over the time wasted. I promised myself years ago that id never let someone else waste years of my life and it happened again. How can I get over my anguish? ~Dee

is not uncommon for us to begin focusing on the should haves, could haves, would haves… There’s no need for regret. The reality is that the decisions that you made concerning your relationship were most likely the ones you felt were best at the time. You

should consider the fact that, although it may not have turned out the way you wished it had, your past relationship has likely help clarify for you what you want and need in a relationship, as well as what you don’t want. I suggest that you acknowledge the good experiences that added to your life and likely kept you in the relationship, and accept those things that led to the end of the relationship as lessons on how to avoid making the same mistakes in the future. It may also help to seek emotional support from unbiased, nonjudgmental loved ones while you work to adjust to your new life as a single person. Good luck.

Dr. Ada Craig Roberson is a dedicated wife, mother and advocate for those in need. She is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker within the state of Louisiana and holds a Doctoral degree in Counseling Psychology. Ada has a wealth of experience in working with disadvantaged individuals and has taken the term “Life Enhancement” into a whole new meaning within the social services industry. Her ability to truly understand human behavior has allowed her to transform the lives of many individuals, some of which were hopeless in the eyes of society. She loves a good piece of fine chocolate, a good challenge and stimulating activities. If you have an issue you would like to bring to Dr. Ada’s attention please email askdrada@cognitionmagazine.com or make a post on the Ask Dr. Ada page on www.cognitionmagazine.com

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Q

NEW ORLEANS’ VERY OWN

UEEN OF TEENZ

Kim Dilosa

teen violence in Greater New Orleans. YOUTHanasia Foundation Inc. is the mentoring program dedicated uplifting KD: Kimberly Dilosa, also known as the Greater New Orleans via youth led Queen of Teenz is a girl from the Greater service learning projects while changing New Orleans’ Westbank. I am the oldest the lives of the youth project leaders; of two daughters. I come from a huge Divas Curing Teen Violence is a extended family. My mother has 7 volunteer base for YOUTHanasia and siblings so you can imagine…LOL! I’m support group for women who have been 37 years old. A 1992 graduate of Xavier affected by teen violence and/or who Prep High School, and a 1997 graduate of want to see it eradicated; and Tuskegee University. Everyone calls me teenzMATTER Productions is a social Kim or CNN (my friends say I know “all entrepreneurship venture that uses the the news”…LOL!) Yes I have many creativity and talents of teenagers to raise awards but I am a community servant at awareness and money for worthy causes heart. Kim is just a girl who likes to see in Greater New Orleans. The Teen everyone smile, no one hurt, and who Dynasty is a machine working to fight believes in the infinite life saving power youth violence, a public health issue of youth creativity. I love using my greatly plaguing our city. creativity to create fun events for great causes. The absolute loves of my life are CM: It so obvious that youth my children KaJa and Jahari, and my engagement is your passion. How did hubby John Dilosa, Jr. you discover this? (From our understanding you began in another career CM: What is the “Teen Dynasty” and path) what was your inspiration for creating KD: My degree is in architecture. If you it? would have told me I’d be designing KD: The Teen Dynasty is a family of lives versus buildings when I was in agencies dedicated to the eradication of college, I would have laughed you under CM: Tell us who is the infamous Kim “Queen of Teenz” Dilosa is?

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the table. Prior to college graduation, I would return home to intern in the Port of New Orleans planning department every summer. I along with the other interns would sit together in the board room for lunch to talk, read the local papers. Our peers were DYING. Period. It became clear that I was returning home after graduation AND I’d volunteer on the weekends to make sure my little sister, younger cousins and their friends had something to do to keep them out of harm’s way. Well, the weekend trips grew. Then I started to hear “I can’t wait to graduate from college so I can leave here!” I didn’t want that…I wanted them to do what I did. Stay in New Orleans and fight! I added service learning to our weekend trips to nurture and spark a passion for our city among my teen protégés. Although my work has gotten more intricate and I’ve personally mentored over 1500 kids….the foundation is still the same. Work to save our city while saving you! This is OUR CITY. There’s no place like New Orleans. THIS IS MY CITY!!!! I am born and bred…New Orleans. I LOVE NEW ORLEANS, and without children/ youth, my city does not have a chance


CM: We understand how giving you are to the teens of the Greater New Orleans area, how does your family respond to your efforts being that you’re a wife and mother of two?

It is not OK to die at 13, 14, 15...some seem to be desensitized by teen homicides and suicides. This atrocity rocks me to my core just like I did when I started YOUTHanasia. “My kids” need the city to know….they don’t wake up wanting to kill themselves and others. They need the city to know…what you see on the news is the end result of years and years of personal trauma that some adult didn’t take the time to intervene in. The local media and government DOES NOT GET IT! My city is in Louisiana, the nation’s prison capital. Thus, I live in the midst of a community with a heinous “lock them up” mentality where our youth are concerned. I don’t care if you are a 13 year old who has killed someone or a 13 year old who makes straight A’s…you are still 13 years old. There are stories within these children that would make grown men shutter. I cannot stop until the last story is told. It breaks my heart when I hear another teen homicide report because I didn’t move fast enough to get that story out of that child.

KD: I LOVE MY FAMILY! My work definitely goes beyond me. I am raising my children to know community service is who we are at the core. No matter what path they may take in life, they must serve others in some capacity. The kids I mentor are big sisters and brothers to my kids, they are family. My husband is known as “Uncle John” and he is the father some of these kids have never had. When you are genuine and true about your purpose in life, others are drawn to you and your work. My kids were raised in The Teen Center for Non-Violence, a teen center we had for 3 years in Gretna, Louisiana. I bring kids home…my grandma and aunts are their grandma and aunts…LOL! My mama is their mama. Some of my kids are grown and married, so when they have kids, I say “I’m gonna be a grandma!” LOL! They are my kids for life. CM: Tell us a brief success story of one of your teens?

KD: 98% of YOUTHanasia graduates go on to successful employment, college graduation, etc. Kourtney Heart was a shy 11 year old girl when she came into my mentoring program. Now she’s a bonafide R&B recording artist and celebrity. Although I am very proud of my kids, one child still goes down as my greatest success story. He taught me success is not always about good grades and what CM: What was your most exciting society calls “normal”. Julian Jefferson, a project with the “Teen Dynasty”? slim 13 year old who was over 6’ tall. Yes…he was a real live JJ Evans from the KD: I LOVE ALL OF THEM! LOL! show “Good Times”, and this would Sometimes I scare myself with my creativity…LOL! Let’s see…I absolutely prove true in more ways than one. I took the kids on a field trip and as always, loved The SmokeOUT Tour! When we Julian had the floor. He was a comedian. learned 25% of Louisiana’s high school students smoke, I created a concert tour to He made the kids laugh AND he made me laugh too. We were on the bus and Julian raise awareness about youth smoking cracked a joke about another kid that was prevention. It was funded by Louisiana so funny. It wasn’t anything foul that hurt Tobacco Free Living, and consisted of the child….it was so true, that the kid who students rewriting R&B songs as was the target of the joke had to laugh anti-smoking anthem. The kids toured like real celebrities, bringing the show to himself. I was laughing so hard...I didn’t local schools, churches, youth rallies and notice Julian staring at me in silence. When I asked him “What’s wrong community events! It was so awesome Julian?” He said “Ms. Kim, no teacher and sooooo cute! never laughs at my jokes. They tell me to shut up and sit down or they’ll put me out.” I said, “It was funny 19 Julian!” In that instance, I connected with a kid who

was making straight F’s in school. I connected with a kid who was shocked that an adult allowed him to be himself. I connected with a kid who I discovered is a gifted artist. He is my Picasso. Yes….Julian went on to paint 2 wall size murals in our teen center. He has also designed many logos for some of our community partners. Julian is not perfect. Today, he has a jail record but Julian recognizes right from wrong and knows he has to pay the consequences for whatever wrong he does. We talk almost daily on Facebook. I am very proud that he recognizes me as his mentor. My Julian Jefferson moment was the beginning of my success because it was then I realized what I needed to do to connect with kids who society says are “nobodies”. It was the greatest day in my life when I broke that barrier and the true Julian came out. He was no longer afraid to show his gift. No longer afraid to be called soft or nerd. I gave him the true me, and he gave me the true him and continues to do so today. This is the foundation of my work. I can’t begin to end teen violence unless I get to the root of the cause in these kids. I can’t get to the root unless I genuinely connect. I had to let Julian know the story of Jim Carrey. Jim was also considered a class clown. One day his teacher told him she was tired of him disrupting the class but if he sat down and behaved she would give him a 5 minute spotlight everyday at the end of class. The rest is history. I have duplicated myself and my work ethic in the kids I mentor and in the


publicly advocate for The Teen Dynasty. On the flipside, I have kids who pray they even see their mom and don’t know their dad. My husband and I have done everything from buy prom dresses and tuxedos to attend PTA meetings as parents for kids whose parents are drug addicted, being raised by elderly grandparents, etc. We gladly step in to make sure each child has great memories of their teen years even if their home life is grim. CM: If you can summarize the community’s response to your organizations efforts, what would it be?

neighborhoods I have worked with. It is my way of sustaining social change for the long haul. You will know a “Kim’s Kid”. My kids can execute a service learning project without me, and so can their families. It is my way of insuring the teen violence eradication work continues in Greater New Orleans. “Kim’s Kids” can spit teen violence statistics in front of a news camera with their eyes closed. I had to duplicate myself in the kids to insure teen violence eradication in my city remains as important and as relevant as the fight for adequate levee protection and educational reform. I like the fact that when you say the name “Kim Dilosa” in my city, youth advocacy comes to mind. I like the fact that when you speak about teenagers in my city, the name “Kim Dilosa” comes to mind. My supporters and I have worked to make teen violence eradication a common term in Greater New Orleans by connecting with the souls of teenagers then training them to connect with each other and the community for the common good. The day I learned the key to teen violence eradication was to genuinely connect with the pain, the joy, the ups, and the downs that lie within each child was the greatest. CM: Describe the parental/family involvement of the teens in your program? KD: I have worked with the best of the best and the worst of the worst. Some of my parents are all in: they volunteer, they have the kids where they are supposed to be when they are supposed to be, the

mentality in this community that does not make room for youth expression or second chances. Jefferson Parish is only 30% African American, yet 70% of its juvenile incarcerated is African American. This is a problem. The alternative schools here are mini prisons. Clearly, this will not do. If I can learn to genuinely connect with this population, I will not stand idly by and witness degreed adults come to “get a paycheck” while the kids suffer in emotional hells. IT’S TIME TO SHAKE UP SOME FOLKS ON A LARGER SCALE.

CM: Last question, what is your overall dream for the youth of Greater KD: There is the teen violence New Orleans? prevention movement, and then there’s my movement: teen violence ERACATION. Teen violence eradication KD: In the next 5 years, I will be a part is in direct competition with the local of planning and hosting citywide media that makes its money from edutainment events in the Greater New reporting the bloodiest stories on the Orleans community dedicated to teen nightly news. I realize the media has a job to do, but so do I. I have to keep kids violence eradication via consumption of alive AND overpower the negative idle time and creative expression. These energy being circulated each night on the events can be studied and duplicated by news, then again in the morning recap on other U.S. cities dealing with a teen the radio. If you are constantly telling a violence crisis (Chicago, Baltimore, community “…5 kids were shot and Washington D.C., etc.) I am going to the killed tonight…3 kids were shot and production/entertainment side of my killed last night...” This is what repeats in the minds of our people. This is what I’m work to broaden and increase my service up against. I can overpower this by area and serve more teenagers. Thus far, creating positive teen campaigns that are my teen violence prevention work has just as large as the news reports. been via one on one mentoring, small Hollywood, CA also has a lot of murders service learning projects with my BUT you don’t hear about them because mentees, focus groups in low performing the city is known for making dreams come true and housing “the beautiful schools, partnership work with political people” of our world. The teen violence officials, other community groups, etc. I eradication movement is up against those am ready to use the reputation I have in who run our nation’s prison capital, the Greater New Orleans along with these state of Louisiana. There is a lock-em up successful partnerships to create teen-friendly productions that will draw the nation’s attention to our teen population for reasons other than the youth crime. My dream of creating a teen-friendly Greater New Orleans is now an achievable goal. Thus, nationwide duplication of teen edutainment events originating here in Greater New Orleans is what I’ll be working on for the next 5 years. 20


YOUTHanasia presents the Talented Youth Fest 2012 Cognition Magazine gladly took part within the Talented Youth Fest held at Oakwood Mall in Gretna, Louisiana. The event featured local businesses, organizations, and performances by local teens. The Performances ranged from rap groups, singers and dancers. This event was designed to shed some light and publicity to those youth that are doing positive activities as opposed to displaying the negative aspects of inner city youth.

Host Kim Dilosa, CM Editor & CEO Malcolm Armstrong Jr. and girl group

Kourtney Heart & CM Chief Editor & CEO Malcolm Armstrong Jr.

Tommy Bolds, John Dilosa & Alvin House

Visitors at the Cognition Magazine Table view our latest issue Raffle winner CM Editor & CEO Malcolm Armstrong Jr. and girl group

Visitors at the Cognition Magazine Table sign in for raffle of portable DVD player

Visitors at the Cognition Magazine Table

John Dilosa, Tommy Bolds, and Frank Bedel 21

Raffle winner & CM Editor & CEO Malcolm Armstrong Jr.


BACK

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FRUITS 1

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1) APPLES: This simple fruit contains many helpful vitamin properties such as fiber, flavonoids which prevents heart disease and strokes, and fructose. Apples lower LDL (harmful cholesterol) and raises HDL (beneficial cholesterol). The skin of apples also contain UV-B protection . Red apples are considered the healthiest fruit on earth. 2) GRAPES: These bite sized sweet delights contain nutrients such as Phytonutrients which are disease preventing compounds. Grapes also contain Resveratrol which is a potent antioxidant that lowers the risk of cardiovascular disease. 3) STRAWBERRIES: Strawberries have several significant nutritional properties. These berries contain phenols which prevent inflammation which may be beneficial for children with asthma. Strawberries also contain 136% of the RDA of Vitamin C which significantly lowers blood pressure and boosts the immune system. It has also been proven that 3+ servings of strawberries can prevent vision disorders such as macular degeneration. 4) PAPAYA: This brightly colored fruit is a nutritional powerhouse. Papaya contains a high amount of Potassium and Vitamin A which is great for fighting colds/flu. Papaya is also great for digestive health because it contains Papain, an digestive enzyme that promotes natural digestion. Drinking papaya juice cleanses the colon by clearing infection, pus and mucus.

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SCHOOL

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ts back to children and our children to basics of snack admit, nowadays th our childre ridiculously satu sugars, carbs, YOU diabete hypertension is on t child particularly African We at Cognition Ma time we take it back show the benefits of tables, and juices. E with persuading you foods th benefit them in


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school time for our it is surely time for get back to the ks. You have to he snack choices for en are just urated with fats, NAME IT. Obesity, es, and the rise within our dren n American children. agazine feel that its k to the basics and natural fruits, vegeEnjoy and be creative ur child to eat these hat will n the long run.

BASICS VEGITABLES 1

1) CORN: This veggie is very high in Fiber (Insoluble Fiber) which aids in constipation and hemorrhoids. Corn also contains Folic Acid, Niacin and Vitamin C. It also is known for preventing heart disease.

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2) BROCCOLI: Broccoli contains many vitamin properties such as Vitamin C, Vitamin A, Folic Acid, and Fiber. If you are not a big milk drinker, A good serving of Broccoli will give you a supplement of Calcium. Broccoli also is known for reducing high blood pressure.

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3) SQUASH: This versatile veggie comes in many different shapes and colors but their benefits are also plentiful. Various forms of squash contains Vitamins A & C, Magnesium, and Magnese. Certain forms of squash prevent heart attacks and guards against emphysema.

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4) BELL PEPPERS: Similar to squash, bell peppers also come in various forms. These peppers contain Vitamins A & C and Vitamin B6 which aids in burning fat. Bell peppers contains about 110 grams of water which also aids in the burning of fat.

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Health & Fitness

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r o f ss e n t Fi elle l o o t h n c e S G o t y B ack

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ts back to school time and there's no better time for parents to take some personal time to get in shape. Cognition Magazine teams up with our very own innovative fitness diva Gentelle Pedescleaux of P.E.D.S. (Positive Energy Dance Society) to give our readers some fitness activities that can be done right at home! Try them out at your household and let us know how they work for you. 24


Bicep Lifts

First grab any chair that you feel comfortable using. Bend knees and squat. Rotate sides and repeat.

Spread legs out slightly wider than shoulder length apart and lift both arms straight in the air. Bend elbows down from the air as demonstrated in the photo. Turn hips to the side and continue the exercise and don't forget to alternate sides.

Chair Press with Leg and Buttock Lifts

Place abdomen on char and let legs and harms hang off the edges as shown in Demonstration. Lift legs in air feeling the tension in buttocks and upper legs and Repeat. Bend knees downward so that feet are pointing upward and lift out feeling tension in buttocks and upper legs. Repeat.

By: Gentelle Pedescleaux & Malcolm Armstrong Jr. 25

Health & Fitness

Chair Side Squats


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Depression here is a difference between experiencing sadness and suffering from clinical depression. We as human beings normally experience sadness when an event occurs such as a death of a loved one, an ending of a relationship or various difficulties in life but if these episodes of sadness are continuous and causes difficulty in everyday life, there may exist clinical depression. It is very important that those suffering from clinical depression seek help because it can lead to dangerous consequences such as harm to oneself (self mutilation & self neglect) and most significantly suicide. (info provided by mentalhealthamerica.net)

Symptoms

Other facts for African Americans

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Clinical depression is an illness that affects the entire body

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Clinical depression can be experienced by anyone.

Decreased or increased body weight

Feelings of sadness, anxiousness and excessive crying

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Decreased or increased appetite Headaches, digestive disorders, chronic pain and other medical issues that do not respond to treatment

Feeling guilt, worthlessness, helplessness, hopelessness and negative thoughts.

Depression has often been misdiagnosed and even ignored within black communities.

Decreased energy, fatigue, and feeling “slowed down”

Seeking help for Clinical depression is a sign of strength NOT WEAKNESS.

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Individuals suffering from depression CANNOT just “snap out of it.”

Difficulty making decisions Loss of interest in normally pleasurable activities

Thoughts of death, suicide or suicide attempts

Individuals suffering from Clinical depression tend to “self medicate” by using substances such as alcohol or drugs.

Over 80% of individuals suffering from depression can be treated successfully.

Without treatment symptoms can last for weeks, months and even years. According to the Surgeon General’s report African Americans are significantly represented within populations of those suffering from Clinical depression.

Faith based healing/spiritual attention/prayer can be beneficial but care from a qualified mental health professional is necessary.

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f you or anyone you know has been exposed to any of the above events, its crucial that treatment should be sought as soon as possible so that healing can begin. African Americans are known for resisting psychiatric treatment but we must realize that our bodies not only need medical care but mental care as well. Treatment is 100% confidential and you will find that talking to someone unbiased can be comforting. Look at it as having someone designated just for you to place your discomforts on without judgment. Being strong alone can only carry us so far, Its about time we let someone help us carry the load. We’ve been a strong people for the longest and it has won us a lot of progress but it is also exhausting. Self care is so important and we need to give our minds a break. Don’t be afraid to reach out when things get too tough mentally. Seeking help can only benefit you in the long run.

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Health & Fitness

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What Blacks Should Know


ANTHONY BEAN

&

The Anthony Bean Community Theater

His Theater His Legacy

His Impact on our YOUTH Interview by: Malcolm M. Armstrong Jr. Photos courtesy of : Anthony Bean Community Theater 29


CM: How does it feel being the only African American theatre in the city of New Orleans? AB: Let me reverse that. I wonder if I did not have a theatre of African American presence here in New Orleans. When I first came back from LA, about 14 years ago…NOTHING! Dillard University has a theatre but that is college it’s not a community theatre, you pay your tuition and you go there. We had no presence here (in theatre). We had Ethiopian Theatre which my brother and I founded in 1973 that was still functioning but it functioned when it functioned and since then my brother passed away a few months ago.

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have heard so much (good things of course) about the man that is Anthony Bean and it was an absolute pleasure finally meeting him. We sat down at the entrance to his theatre to conduct the interview and I do not think I have ever enjoyed such a conversation about the arts and youth ever in life. His theatre is one of a kind and the majority of it is orchestrated by its young participants. Anthony Bean has no problem giving credit to the youth he leads through theatre and those that assist him along the way, so much that he barely leaves any credit for himself. He is truly a leader that possesses a candid yet comedic personality that radiates throughout this interview.

CM: Was he an actor as well? AB: He was an actor, it was the Bean Brothers. In ‘73 we founded the Ethiopian Theatre which was the third African American theatre in the city. Believe it or not there were was a time when there were three African American theatres in the city; The Dashiki Theater, The Free Southern Theatre and the Ethiopian Theatre. The Free Southern Theatre is the oldest. It’s kind of interesting because the Free Southern theatre came out of the civil rights movement, Dashiki came out of Dillard’s campus and we (the Ethiopian Theater) came out of everywhere. We were youth we were 16 years old, I was 16 at the time and we wanted to do something. I had the calling back then that I wanted to do theatre but more than that I didn’t want to do theatre, I wanted to own my own theatre. At that time everyone wanted to empower themselves. We wanted blacks who could market. We wanted blacks who were the ones saying “the white man don’t wanna represent us, the white man don’t wanna give us this” so instead of saying what the white man won’t do I go and get my own. If ABCT didn’t exist I wouldn’t be here because I cant sit around and wait on other theatre companies to do something that looks like us or about us when were able and way capable of doing it ourselves. Is it a coincidence that I’m the only African American theatre? I think it’s a shame, I think there should be a theatre in every neighborhood.

CM: Tell us your full name and everything that you’re doing right now (with the theater). AB: (Interrupts interviewer) I don’t know if anyone told you, I don’t talk about myself, I really don’t. I’m not trying to be funny. I was raised up to believe my work speaks for itself. I can show CM: Yes, I find that strange (for a city such as New Orleans). you all the posters, billboards and countless videos/film of my AB: It is a very expensive endeavor and there is no telling work and that speaks volumes. whether and audience will come to support. We do 8 shows a year, more than any theatre in the city black or white. We have CM: This man is so humble; he’s so humble about his work. wonderful season ticket holders that come out to support us and AB: (Jokingly interrupts interviewer) Nah! That’s not true, I’m we do quality shows. We do good sets and costumes and so forth. not humble. It is what we do! I just think that if I don’t do it, if I’m not here we (African Americans) wouldn’t have a presence. Do I benefit from being the only African American theatre? Yes, I guess I do CM: He is really really big on youth empowerment and giving the stage to youth that are coming up with the talent of because there is no one else (he laughs). acting, singing and drama. AB: That is a part of our program. Afterschool program, summer CM: What made you give youth such a strong operational program…we have at any one time at least 100 kids. We have at presence? least 100 African American kids and they’re learning not only the AB: To be honest with you, someone helped me when I was a craft of acting but how to build sets, costumes and even how to kid. I know you’ve heard that before “Oh when I was child…” it run a theatre. If that’s not empowerment, I don’t know what is. still stands. It still fascinates me, no matter how old I get, kids are Were the only African American theatre in the city so with that still fascinated by me when I walk in the room. I think there’s being said, hopefully somebody that I'm training along the way many reasons being in New Orleans and one is my complexion, that can carry on in case something happens to me. they just don’t expect to see a big dark skinned man. Some of my darkest hues of kids gravitate towards me almost immediately. It’s the most amazing thing; it’s like South Africa when you 30


come into my office. I embrace all but somehow I have this lil kinship with my “lil chocolates” so I think I have theatre just for them and nothing else (Anthony laughs out loud with interviewer). I came in from L.A. and I did a workshop lecture at NOCCA, (a local school for the arts) and I promise this is the truth; a black senior, a female came to me and said “Mr. Bean can I talk to you after it’s all done (the workshop)” and I told her no…go ahead. She said “You are the first African American that we have had to come here and do a workshop.”

CM: What is the youngest age group you’ve worked with? AB: 8 years old. CM: And what’s that experience like? AB: I treat them all like actors. I depend on the parents to make things happen and to get the kids in order.

CM: Elaborate on your experience with parental involvement. AB: Unfortunately I see more grandmothers today raising kids and I see momma’s boyfriend picking them up. I get little CM: How does that make you feel? AB: Like they have been bamboozled, they’re being signals that I don’t particularly care for (in terms of parental hoodwinked particularly since this is a chocolate city (New Or- involvement/interaction). I do see mom and dad involved…I do leans) and NOCCA was at that time and still are a great see that and the kid is somewhat more stable. (Anthony tells percentage African American. I had a problem with that. I called interviewer) Come by me (speaking of the summer program at a meeting with the principal and staff over and I expressed my the theatre which runs from 8am-8pm) I tell you, these kids, concern and they promised me that they were going to do better they don’t want to go home and if you ask any parent they will and to this day there is not one African American teacher teach- tell you the kids do not want to go home. We are talking about ing in the theatre department…to this day. I find that when our CAMP! We are talking about giving up your vacation, giving up kids are doing something that looks like them (such as) reading your summer, getting up out of bed. I think the bottom line is about who they are, they’re just like the lil white kid learning winning a child over because a lot of times you’re introducing about their history. It gives them a lil pep in their step. There’s the kids to the arts. They don’t know anything about it (the arts) something about self esteem that you can’t buy. This is an ego and their parents don’t know anything about it but they want to business, theatre is 90% ego and the rest is talent. You have to get their kids involved. A child knows when you’re for real and sell yourself and you must produce. Now a lot of us, we sell but you care about them. I can scream and holler (at them) but you we don’t produce; I make sure we produce here. Any given can’t because they aint gonna take that from nobody else. Plus show you look up there (the stage) and see kids from 13-17 kids can discern. When they first meet me they can discern (years of age). Should anything happen to me, quite a few of whether I’m being a meanie/ evil person or whether I care about them (ABCT youth) are equipped to run it (speaking of the them. theatre). We are 12 years old here; we got some kids that have lived here since day one, they’re adults now. It does me proud to (During the interview a Caucasian male by the name of John first of all know my divine design, this is what God intended walks in to speak with Anthony about someone coming to pick and then to see the fruition of my labor…that’s an orgasm that I up something in the building. Mr. Bean explains to interviewer cannot explain. At the end of the show (speaking of the end of that John has been helping with the theatre for some time and last Sunday’s production) the audience was leaving because we he begins to tell us about his efforts.) were giving an after cast party. I went and sat down center stage on the outside and all the kids just came around me and they AB: John has been with me since day one. John does just sat down and they were waiting for me to say something everything, the stage (meaning stage wise)… he builds all the and he (Alvin, a member of the ABCT theatre) said “Anthony, sets. John’s got his own theatre and he is an actor in his own I’ve never seen anything like it, this is truly amazing to be a right. He comes here and I just appreciate him because he is one black man.” Women have that responsibility but we as men, do of the people that not have it. It’s a calling, and I think when my work is done I keep this theatre will cease to exist and I’m not trying to be funny. I strongly going. Did I menbelieve there is a higher power and that’s why ABCT had to tion he is a white exist and then I don’t have to kiss nobody’s ass too (Anthony man? Some of the and interviewer laugh)! people that have been keeping this thing going CM: How do you select or audition your youth? AB: They have to be wonderful readers. To be an actor you (financially) have have to be a wonderful reader, if they can read you already got been white. It costs me. If you can memorize something, you don’t have to be good a quarter of a because I can train you. You have to have an interest! I don’t million dollars to allow dating here. I hold a standard that is very important. They run this thing. I’m never seen me smoke, they have probably seen me drink, not hoping that would like an alcoholic of course but I might hold a rum & coke during change about us (adult) rehearsals. Some of these kids don’t have anybody at supporting our own home to say, no dating (and setting guidelines etc.) and mean it. and taking care of “US.” You have a 31


lot of African American parents in this acting school, they would not bring their kids here, they would bring their kids to other acting schools they would pay five times as much. We have issues as a race as far as supporting one another, loving one another. It’s a struggle to keep it going and it’s a struggle every month to stay on top. We do charge tuition, were the cheapest thing in town but if a child doesn’t have money, I never turn a child down. CM: What is the next production you have coming up? AB: August Wilson. We always do August Wilson in September…always. Its August Wilson’s Play “Seven Guitars” then in 2013 were doing “Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom.” At that point, 2013 we have done every play that he has ever written. He has only written ten plays and we have completed his cycle and we’re making a big deal out of it.

CM: So you want to be the premiere acting school? AB: Yes and I would like to see it in my lifetime. I would like to financially not have to worry about how I’m going to pay bills. One of the things that I hope the city, state, city council, mayor’s office, NORD, that they invest more in the youth. This city has to learn to invest more in the youth.

For more information on the Anthony Bean Community Theater or to make a donation please visit: www.anthonybeantheater.com

CM: What is your dream for the theatre? I do believe it’s going to go on long after your gone. AB: That’s bullshit! I want it to burn. When I’m gone it’s going with me and I want this whole building in my plot! (Anthony jokingly yells out as he and interviewer laugh hysterically). I would like to own this entire block. I would have a dormitory in the back. Right now they have apartments, I would love to own them and make them into a dormitory for kids that want to come out of town. I want to make it where people know that if they want to go to acting school in this city, or anywhere for that matter they know where unless they're (already) here. I would like to see what I have done pay off which means I want this to be where no one else could touch it. Not just black or white, just period. If you want acting lessons you have to go there (The ABCT theatre).

IMAGINE YOUR BUSINEESS HERE ADVERTISE WITH US! GREAT RATES & GREAT CIRCULATION Contact: advertising@cognitionmagazine.com

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ou meet a new partner and you're feeling them. You all get on THAT level... That level being having sex... It's your first time with the new partner and so many things are going through your head , like "What will they think of my body?" "Oh these stretch marks," "I hope she doesn't say anything about my chest hair," all forms of natural insecurities we face with a new partner. I know some people are insecure about certain aspects of themselves so on the latest episode of #QBAfterDark, I asked: "do you have insecurities

When it comes to real life sex

questions, there are many things that some people wonder whether or not they are normal happenings during sex. I host a weekly sex discussion session on Twitter giving people the opportunity to answer some questions and submit questions they may have wanted to ask but didn’t want to seem weird. I’ve asked everything from “Is a bad kisser a turn off to you?” to “Ladies, do you swallow?” The responses to the questions can be off the wall! If you have any questions that you might want submitted, follow @QBAfterDark on twitter.com and submit your questions. The discussion sessions happen every Monday at 10pm sharp. #QBAfterDark

about your body when having sex with a new partner for the first time?" and I got these responses:

Love & Relationships

Thoughts after Dark ” B Q “ h t i Y W

Nikki aka @lickable_me504 said: "Yea my c-section mark" Same Ol' Gee aka @geeman504 and My Lupa aka @ThisisChalupa simply said: "nope" Jiah aka @ablondebomb said: "Nope, not at all" C-Hood aka @topmodelciara wanted to know: "If u insecure about your body! Wtf u having sex for?" and Bre aka @butterfliesblue responded: "Some people have sex to gain confidence." @Jess_vs_Jil said: "yeah my stretch marks on my tummy!!"

M

e personally, I love my body. I have zero insecurities when I'm about to have sex with a new partner. If he likes me to the point where I'd lay down to have sex with him, he'd better like every flaw on my body. "I ain't perfect. Nobody walking this earth's surface is," to quote Jay-Z so I'd never be insecure about any part of me. Some people may need to reevaluate themselves and their partners before they lie down with them if they have to be insecure about a part of their body. At least that's what I'm thinking. 35


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hen you squeeze an orange, you get orange juice. Why? Because that’s what is inside of an orange. When a person is squeezed (metaphorically), you also get what the person is holding inside.

One of the greatest lessons that we can learn in life is to understand that a person's angered response toward us may have nothing to do with us at all. They may simply be reflecting other stressors in their lives. Knowing this makes it easier to respond in a more tempered, appropriate, and responsible manner. If we don't understand this important yet simple principle, we may react to their anger with similar anger, elevating the situation to one of conflict. Remember their anger is not about you it’s about them and hurting people often hurt people. Don’t allow situations, events, or people with problems, no matter how dramatic or traumatic to force you to close your heart. Don’t let the actions or reactions of people with closed hearts make you shut down, or cause you to react in a manner that goes against your caring and God loving nature. Whenever you find that you are being challenged, pray and ask the Creator to help you view the situation from a place of love. -Darrin L. Harris.

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Be Inspired

W

The Squeeze


e s i t r e v ! s Ad U

h t wi

For Advertising Information contact

Cognition Magazine, LLC Phone: (504) 208-0704 Email: advertising@cognitionmagazine.com

Website: www.cognitionmagazine.com

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