Seven Days, October 28, 1998 by Seven Days

W hile Others Vermont’s Democratic Representatives Work for Solutions!

A C T IO N S S P E A K L O U D E R T H A N W O R D S D E M O C R A T S L IS T E N E D T O V E R M O N T E R S A N D A C T E D ! #1 YOUR TAX DOLLARS Bf Bf Bf Hf Sf

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#2 TRANSPORTATION Hf Bf Bf Bf

RESERV ES FU LL IN C R E A S E D FU N D IN G FO R 2 FO R 1 TOW N HIGHWAY A ND B R ID G E PRO GRA M IN C R E A S E D R A IL FU N D IN G FO R P A SSE N G E R A N D FR EIG H T L E N D IN G PR O G R A M FO R P R O JE C T S H ELPIN G ECO N O M IC D EV E LO PM EN T

#3 THE ECONOMY Bf Bf Bf Bf Bf

T H E DOW NTOW N B IL L - IN C E N T IV ES TO IN V E ST IN OU R DOW NTOW NS V E R M O N T STA TE IN F R A ST R U C T U R E B A N K S U S T A IN A B L E JO B S FU N D -L E V E R A G E S C A PITA L FO R V ER M O N T B U S IN E S S E S IN C R E A SE D T R A V EL A N D TO U R ISM B U D G E T T A X IN C E N T IV E S FO R TRA IN IN G A ND JO B D EV E LO PM EN T

#4 HEALTH CARE gf Bf Bf Bf

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#5 EDUCATION gf Bf Bf Bf Bf Sf Bf Bf

C O M M IT TE D TO E Q U A L ED U C A TIO N A L O PPO RTUNITIES FO R A L L O F V E R M O N T ’ S C H ILD R E N E N S U R E Q U A L IT Y TH RO U GH L O C A L PLA N N IN G A C C O U N T A B IL IT Y TH RO U GH STATEW IDE A S S E S S M E N T A N D REPO RTS TO PA R EN TS A N D C O M M U N IT IE S V E R M O N T H IG H ER ED U CATION SA V IN G S PLA N THAT A LLO W S PA REN TS TO SA V E FO R T H E IR C H IL D R E N ’ S C O L L E G E ED U CA TIO N IN C L U D IN G H OM E ST U D Y ST U D E N T S INTO PU B LIC SC H O O L A C TIV IT IES G O V ER N O R S D IPLO M A FO R HIGH A C H IE V EM E N T T E C H N IC A L ED U CA TIO N - INCO RPO RATING IN D U ST R Y R EC O G N IZ ED C R E D E N T IA L S IN C R E A S E D STA TE FU N D IN G FO R SP E C IA L EDUCATION

#6 WORKERS Bf Bf Bf Bf

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# 7 CHILDREN & FAMILIES Bf Bf Bf Bf Bf

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#8 ENVIRONMENT Bf Bf Bf Bf Bf Bf

R E SE R V E D FA R M S, SH O R EFR O N T & W IL D E R N E SS FO R F U T U R E V E R M O N T ER S H EA V Y C U T T IN G L EG ISLA T IO N TO E N SU R E S U ST A IN A B L E FO R E ST R Y PR E V EN T IO N O F M E R C U R Y CONTAM INATION IN O U R A IR A N D WATER E N SU R E D L O C A L C O N T R O L IN SITIN G O F COM M U N ICATIO N TO W ERS F IN A N C IA L A SS IS T A N C E TO FA R M ER S FO R PRO PER W ASTE M A N A G EM E N T W O R K IN G FA R M S A N D F O R E ST S T A X ED AT C U R R E N T U S E V A LU E

Vermont Democrats: Part of the Solution! Vote for Democratic Representatives November 3rd PAID

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“ With this odor of incest hanging over the molded couple, it’s proba bly just as well that neither pos sesses the capaci ty to drop trou.”

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Features

question

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Once a mere accessory, Ken breaks out of his mold

weekly mail . .............. ...........................

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in s id e t r a c k ......................*....................

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Who Me? Old?

q u ir k s .......................................................................

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A reluctant soon-to-be senior navigates “denial”

crank call

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By Ron Powers .............................................................page 10

tro u b le to w n ............................................................

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Bully Pulpit

life in h e l l ...............................................................

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Terrence Webster-Doyle wants you to win your next fight hands-down

c la s s ifie d s ...............................................................

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car t a l k ................................

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By Erik Esckilsen........................................................... page 13

straight dope

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Look Dad, No Hands

red m e a t ..................................................................

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story m in u te ............................................................

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crossword p u z z le ....................................................

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By Glenn Severance............................................................. page14

real a s tr o lo g y .................................................

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Father Figure

p e rs o n a ls .................................................................

page 4 9

lola, the love counselor

page 4 9

By Ruth Horowitz.......................................................... page 8

An Amsterdam encounter proves you can’t be prepared for everything

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Fora single dad raising daughters, life is a . ..handful

255 S. Champlain St.,

By Pamela Polston............................................................... page17

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The Communication Game

Tel: 8 0 2 .8 6 4 .5 6 8 4

Do relationships have a sporting chance?

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Departments

Not Just a Boy Toy

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the mostly unfabulous social life of ethan greene

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page 50

A Cut Below Vermont's sole mohel weighs in on the subject of circumcision By Sarah Van Arsdale........................................................... page20

‘Southern’ Culture Art review: Francoise Nussbaumer and Barbara Rachko

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By Mark Awodey ............................................................ page 35

ALTERNATIVE N EW SW EEK LIES

Disrobing for Dollars l

t j V E R IF IE D

AUDIT CIRCULATION

A “b u ff” guy bares all for art By John B e ll......................................................................... page40

COVER BY MATTHEW THORSEN AND SAMANTHA HUNT.

A Wing and a Prayer

Listings

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Dance Preview: Dos Alas/Two Wings

art

By Paula Routly......... ................................................... page 42

film

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October 28, 1998

SEVEN DAYS *

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What’s the worst advice your father ever gave you? Go get the bail out of your dog's mouth. — Craig Gurwich Musician, visiting Burlington It would have to be ‘pre law, law school, private practice, President of the Usitetf States.’ th e night before I was going to take the ISATs, I sat up talking to my roommate until four in the morning, and I made the choice that I was going to English. And I’m just rollin’ in the dough now! — Philip Baruth Professor, author Burlington (Much laughter.) Most of his advice was pretty good — I just didn’t learn it until

— Danny Goss Wholesaler, Junction Subee Ctr. New Haven - ;

. R

T O O M U CH M ISSPEAKING It was with great interest that I read Peter Freyne’s October 14 col umn [Inside Track] recounting the incident in which candidate Joe Acinipura allegedly sexually harassed Sen. Elizabeth Ready. According to Freyne, Acinipura dismissed the incident saying, “we all misspeak in life.” Having heard Acinipura’s com ments numerous times during the campaign, it appears that he has a tremendous propensity for mis speaking. Take his statements at a candidates’ forum in Middlebury on October 21, in which he sounded decidedly pro-choice and very much in support o f Act 60 despite previ ous statements in which he likened abortion to infanticide and described Act 60 as a tax scheme. I like to know where my representa tives stand on the issues. Given his tendency to “misspeak,” I cannot trust Acinipura to vote the way he says he will. I sincerely hope the vot ers o f Addison County don’t send him to Montpelier. t — Alexander Zwerdling Middlebury ‘BI’ FOCAL October 14 was truly a fantastic day in the life o f one burgeoning local folk singer, namely me — Katherine Quinn (actually, the whole experience o f working with the staff that did the article [“Fresh Folk”], writer Pamela Polston and photographer Matthew Thorsen, was a pleasure). However, the other reason that Oct. 14 will go down as one o f my “fave” memories thus far is that on that afternoon I had the pleasure o f playing at UVM for a speak-out organized by the students o f the GLBTA (Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender Alliance). The event was a celebration o f National Coming Out Week, and although the sun didn’t “come out” for the

event, I did! It was wonderful to be a part o f this event which celebrated both diversity and community. As a bisexual woman, I realize that I am incredibly fortunate to be a member o f such an active and sup portive community, and I feel that being open about our sexuality is a vital part of creating an environment in which people are free and safe to be themselves. So, I am writing to thank the students at UVM for organizing such a great event, to thank Seven Days for such a beauti ful article, and to clarify one state ment made in that article, “What comes through is a ’90s woman who knows who she is, what she wants and what she has to offer, and if a guy can’t recognize it, well, too bad.” That goes for gals, too! — Katherine Quinn Burlington STANDING UP FOR MATH I’m not really sure if this should be addressed to Ms. [Pamela] Polston or the lady she interviewed [October 14], Ms. [Katherine] Quinn. In “Fresh Folk,” Ms. Polston’s article, the reader comes across this quote: “She seems like she’s always been a singer, a poet, a right-brained sprite of a lass. But at the Quaker School...she was a studious ‘nerd,’ she reveals, enamored o f math and science...after she switched to edu cation...she lost her naivet^...” There are several things going on here, both explicit and implied: 1) Right-brained people are “sprites;” left-brained people, by contrast, are — what? Morose? Depressives? 2) Studious math and science majors are “nerds”: this one is so old it’s got gray hairs, yet it’s amazing how often one encounters it. The impli cations have been addressed many times before, perhaps nowhere with more wit and tolerance than in Carl

My father was bom and ■ raised in New York City, and couldn't understand how I could move to Vermont and live in the middle of nowhere. He advised me to stay there, go to school locally and have a career use that’s where everything hap pens. Which was the fur thest thing from the truth — I’d be miserable in New York. I need wide open spaces, mountains and clean air. — Mike Bandelato Vice president of All Points Booking

bologna sandwich. — Mark Gauthier ■ Co-owner, Red Square Burlington ■

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Letters P o lic y : SEVEN DAYS wants your rants and raves, in 250 words or less. Letters are only accepted that respond to content in Seven Days. Include your fu ll name and a daytime phone number and send to: SEVEN DAYS, P.0. Box 1164, Burlington, VT 0 54 0 2 -1 1 6 4 . fax: 8 6 5 -1 01 5 e-mail: sevenday@together.net

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C O R R EC TIO N : We would like to assure our readers that last Wednes day was indeed October 21, even though we forgot to change the date and issue number on our cover. Our apologies in particular to all the librarians faithfully compiling our paper.

STATE SENATE

Iiy

Vermont. Don't look so smug

OSTEO PATH IC APOLOGIES I apologize for my letter regard ing Dr. Ken Ciongoli [Weekly Mail, October 14]. He is indeed proud of being an osteopath. My letter caused him great pain, and for that I am sincerely sorry. The letter was writ ten in a mistaken sense o f irony. My recent conversations with Dr. Ciongoli have revealed his commit ment to “the difference a D.O. makes.” As osteopaths, we are trained to treat patients holistically — to treat the body, mind and spir it. Additionally, we are trained to use spinal manipulation to improve many neurological conditions. Manipulation is often confused with chiropractic, but osteopaths were using spinal manipulation for many years before chiropractic was invent ed. Furthermore, some osteopaths specialize in manipulative treat ments, and they receive referrals from M.D.s, other D.O.s and even D.C.s. The rest of [my] letter remains unchanged. — John McPardand, D.O. Middlebury

GARDY

Malietts Bay

lo for lea

Sagan’s book, The Demon-Haunted World: Science as a Candle in the Dark (p.382-83): “One o f the stereotyped occupa tions is science. Scientists are nerds, socially inept, working on incom prehensible subjects that no normal person would find in any way inter esting... Like the mad-scientist image to which it’s closely related, the nerd-scientist stereotype is per vasive in our society. What’s wrong with a little good-natured fun at the expense of scientists? If, for whatever reason, people dislike the stereotypi cal scientist, they are less likely to support science. Why subsidize geeks to pursue their absurd and incomprehensible little projects? Well, we all know the answer to that: Science is supported because it provides spectacular benefits at all levels in the society...” For those who would claim sci ence isn’t so hot, I say well and good: Just hand over your light bulbs, refrigerator, 911 service, and any antibiotics you may have had to make use of in the last two decades or so. Not to metion easily obtain able and effective birth control, fresh water to drink and to bathe in, cli mate control, your car, faxes, e-mail, cable T V and your morning coffee. The prevailing attitude, that sci entists are Creeps from Another Planet, and math and science majors leave a palpable slime trail wherever they go, is in part responsible for the large number o f both undergradu ates and graduates I see on campus without even elementary math skills. This is not a good thing. — C. Chaya Boughan Burlington Boughan is a mathematics professor at the University o f Vermont

SEVEN DAYS....................... ...... m a d e in V e r m o n t October 28, 1998

• DEVELOP A MORE EFFICIENT. COST-EFFECTIVE STATE GOVERNMENT • WORKTOWARDS JOB AND WAGE GROWTH FOR VERMONTERS • DEFEND LOCAL CONTROL. REPEAL OR SUBSTANTIALLY REVISE ACT 60 • REDUCETHE BUREAUCRACY ON SMALL AND MEDIUM SIZE BUSINESSES • REDUCE ELECTRIC RATESTHROUGH RESTRUCTURING

SELECT MATT GARDY 7 f you give business the opportunity to create job and wage growth, it will mean lower taxes, yet more tax revenue. This produces better schools, better roads, less crime, and more services for Vermont’s most disadvantaged!” PAID FOR BY MATT GARDY FOR STATE SENATE P.O. BOX 3053 BURUNGTON, VT 05401

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dangerous.” “That kind o f language,” said Ho-Ho, “is Lets hear it for Republican gubernatorial not appropriate for government officials o f any candidate Ruth Dwyer for making this elec kind.” And referring to the recent murders o f a tion interesting. She’s wowed thousands of gay man in Wyoming and a physician in the Vermonters with her excellent communication Buffalo, New York, area who performed abor skills and attractive appearance. Ruthless Ruth tions, he said, “If you do use that kind o f lan is articulate and focused and, to the naked eye, guage you get the kind o f thing that went on appears qualified to lead the state o f Vermont. in Buffalo and Wyoming. Government officials But don’t let appearances fool you, because this cannot use incendiary language no matter how is one book you can’t judge by its cover. strongly they feel about an issue. It is inappro Yours truly fondly remembers the sunny priate to say ‘it’s time for us to get a little dan Sunday afternoon last spring when Ruthless gerous,’ because there are people out there who kicked off the campaign at her will take that as license to picturesque Thetford farm. And behave in a very bad way, what sticks out is the line she and people die as a result o f uttered that seemed to come those things.” out o f nowhere. Yes, indeed. After all the “I am not an extremist,” late Dr. Barnett Slepian was Dwyer blurted out to the hand on an assassination hit list ful o f reporters gathered around published on the Internet by her. The funny thing was, an anonymous band o f anti nobody had asked if she was an abortion fanatics. U.S. Sen. extremist. Ruthless was denying Patrick Leahy’s name is post a charge that hadn’t even been ed on the same list (www. leveled at her. Interesting, as is christiangallery.com/atrocity/ her political resume. aborts.html). Slepian now Ruth was elected to the has a line through his name Thetford school board and as a “fatality.” promptly raised holy hell. Our “That is appalling,” said favorite UVM dropout made Dean. “The people who are such a good impression, the responsible for that are not locals tossed her butt out o f just the crackpots who are office after just one term. That lying in the bushes with a led to her run for the House. rifle. The people who are Ruthless started off just fine in responsible for that are Montpeculiar. G ot a seat on the BY PETER FREYNE zealots who will stop at Appropriations Committee — nothing to get their way.” rare for a rookie — and proceeded to drive So is Ruth Dwyer an extremist? everyone nuts. Needless to say, she was not “I’m not going to deal with that question,” reappointed to that committee in her second Dean replied. “But if she’s going to run for term. It wasn’t her politics so much as her style. governor she’s going to have to be careful o f Even the hired-gun, pro-Republican business the language she uses.” lobbyists couldn’t stomach her. Don’t worry. She won’t. Extremists never Ruth Dwyer was the legislature’s “Little do. And when you peel away Ruth Dwyer’s Miss Know It All,” kind o f like The Selfveneer, that’s all you got left, folks. Righteous Brothers — Reps. Dean Corren and State Senate Showdown — The race for con Terry Bouricius — with whom she got on trol o f the Vermont senate is where the action famously. In fact, Ruth said early in the cam is. Heading the G OP effort is Sen. Vince paign that Corren, her seat mate, had told her Illuzzi, the G OP whip. Reached at the offices he was voting for her. See, birds o f a feather do o f The Vermont Ski Areas Association, which flock together. has donated space for the GOP cause, Illuzzi You see, the key to Ruthless Ruth’s success predicted a 15-15 dead heat. has been a special personality trait that distin Candy Moot, the association’s president, guishes her from the vast majority o f politicians. told Inside Track the in-kind contribution to It’s a quality that would make her destined for Vince and the G OP will be reported. “As a political success in places like Serbia or Bosnia, general rule,” said the Queen o f Flakes, “the but not in places like Vermont. You see, Ruth is Republicans support the job creators in this so absolutely, positively convinced she’s right state.” about every issue that “compromise” is not part Democratic Sen. Peter Shumlin says the o f her vocabulary. It’s Ruth’s way or the highway. race is too close to call. He points out 80 per Hey, totalitarianism has its benefits. cent o f the GOP money is coming from sec For the last two years Dwyer was the angri ond-home owners and gold towns. “The est person under the golden dome. She’d been Republicans tout local control,” scoffed taken down a notch by Speaker Michael Shummy, “but they want the legislature to be Obuchowski and parked on the Commerce controlled by out-of-state second-home own Committee. Ruth was not a happy camper. ers.” Hey, their money’s still green, Shummy. Inside Track will always remember her as the In Chittenden County, the top two blur that went stomping through the fundraisers to date are Democrats: Jim Leddy Statehouse hallways in a puff o f anger. ($26,337) and Janet Munt ($23,715). Among Ruthless has become the G O P s point per Munt’s contributors are Congressman Bernie son in the attack on big government and she’s Sanders and U.S. Attorney Charlie Tetzlaff. a champion o f local control. But when it The top G O P fundraisers are Sen. Helen comes to the legal right o f a woman to control Riehle ($17,780), Dennis Delaney ($15,470) her own body, Ruthless advocates government and Susan Sweetser ($14,447). Sweetser and intervention big-time. And she wants big gov Riehle each received $500 from Allen Martin, ernment to butt its big nose into the relation former G O P chairman and behind-the-scenes ship between a woman and her doctor. This wheeler-dealer. Funny, but Big Al gave Dennis from the candidate who would gut the state’s Delaney $1000. Sexism, Big Al? health programs for children. Sweetser, the Kenneth Starr o f Vermont Gov. Howard Dean, meanwhile, has politics by virtue o f her sleazy 1996 congres known all along that Ruth isn’t going to come sional bid, also picked up $250 from Stuart close to knocking him off. He’s held back on ‘Red” Martin, owner o f WCAX-TV. Bravo! whacking her for her extremist positions for Look, folks, as the saying goes, “If you fear o f giving her the spotlight. But Tuesday don’t vote you’ve got no right to bitch.” And Dean was asked about Dwyer’s remarks to the that’s one right you’ll be real sorry to lose, so anti-Act 60 activist group P.O.S.T., in which do the right thing. ® Ruthless suggested it was time to get “a little

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, O c to b e r 28 , 1998 t » * 4 v v ;i t t

J E V R O lA W '

Price of Fame After Clint Hallam, 48, made the news for being the first person to receive a trans planted hand and forearm, he was identified as a fraud sus pect by two separate jurisdic tions. Police in Western Australia said he is due in court on seven charges stem ming from a pyramid scheme involving fuel credit cards. Authorities in his native village o f Napier, New Zealand, said Hallam is wanted there on bankruptcy charges. • After Ross Jackson, 33, won $107,000 on a nationally tele vised quiz show in England, his creditors rushed to the T V station, demanding that Jackson pay off a string o f debts. • Ryan Martin, 22, whom Cosmopolitan magazine this summer proclaimed one o f Americas most eligible bache lors, was charged with drug ging a 23-year-old woman with a powerful depressant and raping her at his home in Worcester, Massachusetts. Martin, a model who lives with his mother, was quoted in Cosmo as saying his firstdate “turn on” was “a really sweet smile and a nice kiss goodnight.”

Fruits of Research Brussels was rated the

safest o f 29 European and U.S. cities, according to a sur vey o f homicides (murder, manslaughter and infanticide) released by the British Home Office. Belfast was ranked safer than Helsinki, Lisbon and Amsterdam and only slighdy more dangerous than Geneva, Copenhagen and Berlin. Washington, D .C., was the most dangerous, 16 times more violent than Belfast and 173 times more violent than Brussels. • The longer Mexican immi grants remain in the United States, the worse their mental health becomes, according to a study by William Vega, a pro fessor o f public health at the University o f California at Berkeley. “This is clearly a social effect, not a biological one,” Vega said. “Mexicans come to this country with some kind o f natural protec tion against mental disorder, and that breaks down very quickly in American society.” • Women who wear provoca tive attire may devote so much mental activity to their appear ance that their brains aren’t able to think o f much else, according to University of Michigan psychologist Barbara Frederickson. “It isn’t just clothes like bathing suits, that are revealing or low-cut, that can have this effect,” Frederickson said. “Any cloth

ing or circumstances that make a woman feel self-con scious about how she looks to others, even if she thinks she looks great, might reduce the mental energy she brings to demanding tasks, like solving advanced math problems.” • Researchers at the University o f Wisconsin reported in the Journal o f Family Psychology that married couples in dual income households have sexual relations almost as often (5.63 times a month) as couples where the woman stays home (5.96 times). • Researchers at Marywood University in Scranton, Pennsylvania, reported that when subjects were asked to give an impromptu speech about Bosnia, those who had viewed an episode o f “Seinfeld” before their talk had lower increases in heart rate than those who hadn’t.

more than two years in a psy chiatric ward, was sometimes restrained with leather straps to stimulate abuse memories and, at Braun’s urging, hospi talized her two pre-school-age children for almost three years. “I began to add a few things up,” Burgus told the Chicago Tribune, “and realized there was no way I could come from a litde town in Iowa, be eating 2000 people a year, and nobody said anything about it.”

Attorney Jan McDermott as the brains behind a gang that robbed at least 12 bars in Philadelphia, was convicted when 30 witnesses linked him to the crimes. After his arrest, Roderick had let his beard grow hoping to confuse the witnesses, who had no trouble recognizing him.

Curses, Foiled Again Police charged Kenneth McKinzie o f Oxnard, California, with murdering Ruth Eloise Avril, 73, and stealing Christmas presents from beneath her tree. Deputy District Attorney Donald C. Glynn said that among the evidence against McKinzie was a camera that he gave his teen age daughter after

Litigation Nation Patricia Burgus won a $ 10.6 million settlement in a lawsuit against psychiatrist Bennett Braun and Chicago’s Rush-Presbyterian-St. Luke’s Hospital, charging that Braun, through repressed-memory therapy, led her to believe she had 300 separate personalities, ate meatloaf o f human flesh, sexually abused her children and was the high priestess o f a satanic cult. She said she spent

the crime. There was film inside the camera that, when processed, revealed pictures taken by the victim. • Darien Roderick, 20, described by Assistant District

New Theories of Relativity Chris Ahamefule Iheduru, 47, was convicted in Dallas of having sex with his 14-yearold stepdaughter, despite his testimony that he didn’t know sex with a juvenile is illegal since in his native Nigeria it isn’t. Iheduru said he impreg nated the girl after signing a contract with the girl to bear him a son on behalf o f her mother, who is unable to have more children. Pamela Reno, 38, asked doctors at a hospital in Reno, Nevada, to remove sperm from her 19-yearold son Jeremy while he was on life support just before he died so she can become the grandmother of his child. Reno said she would seek an egg donor and carry the baby herself. (7)

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O l Straight and Narrow?

he last time I wrote about men in this col umn it was Fathers Day. The field in front o f my house was filled with eager soccer dads trying to make legends out o f their children, braving wind, mud and mire and bellowing at the top o f their lungs, “What’s the matter with you!?” Four months later, it’s just the same. Same dads, same kids, same game, same goal: Win. Beat. Conquer. Perform. I have no doubt that there are kids out there who don’t want to be play ing, for all the ones who do. I know that there are terri fied children on that field. Such is my nervous way o f tip-toeing into a com mentary on the men who killed Matthew Shepard — straight men, with whom I seem to have less and less in common every year, and who remain a mystery to me at some permanently threat ened and defensive level. A groan went up among some o f my friends when they heard I was still harping on this theme: “Gay vs. Straight,” “Us vs. Them.” I can only point to the .

There is always a sexual attraction among men for each other, whether they recognize it or not, whether they’re gay or straight. Shepard murder, obviously but exactly, as an explana tion for why the “versus” still exists, and why lately I’ve been thinking the worst thoughts imaginable about

an enemy I’ve lived with all my life. That’s right, an enemy — a permanent standing army o f machismo and testosterone that’s as violent as it is unpredictable, and which prides itself on “accepting” you when it isn’t cracking you over the head. The situation is all the more volatile because there is always a sexual attraction among men for each other, whether they recognize it or not, whether they’re gay or straight. Power is the name o f the game — power that can be exercised benevolently or maliciously, but power all the same. It’s a straight man’s greatest fear that he will be caught short, exposed, confronted with his own anarchic desires and “unmanned” as a result. To this day, the worst thing you can call him is a faggot, and the truth o f the gay experi ence, the origin o f the war, is revealed in that fact. O f course “gay” and “straight” are artificial terms, adjectives rather than nouns. The words “homosexual” and “heterosexual” didn’t even exist until the 19th century, when they were invented by German doctors and the first wave o f psy chotherapists in an effort to illustrate a fundamental dif ference in experience and behavior. That the “homo” part was viewed as a disor der, an “inversion,” is a lega cy all gay men and women live with. The “straight” carry no such baggage, which gives straight men a free hand both in acts o f generosity and acts o f terror, and allows straight women — women whose lives are dominated by the same dynamic — to wonder why gay men are “always making such an issue out o f it.” I was in my early teens when I realized once and for all that women could not be counted on for protection against bullies — and, by extension, killers. Up to that time, although I was flighty, flamboyant and too obvious ly fond o f “the arts,” I was not so much o f a pansy that I attracted attention for it. Boys thought I was funny and girls thought I was exot ic, “confidant” material, a breath o f fresh air across the gender divide. Only when sex itself actually entered the picture

was I perceived as a threat — when curly hairs started sprouting in everybody’s nether regions and boys started cruising each other in the shower. No man is capable o f ignoring another man’s sexual apparatus when he sees it — no man. A late bloomer is in a particularly perilous position, as I was, neither “male” nor “female” but something in between, something challenging and disturbing, with a nice ass and a naked vulnerability that acted as a magnet for sadists. Briefly, until hippiedom saved me, I became a pariah, the kind o f kid that stones were thrown at and who was once tossed fully clothed into Lake Champlain by boys who had once consid ered me “a hoot,” while their girlfriends — my friends, I thought — stood nervously by, tugging at the sleeves o f these strutting wonders and saying, “Oh, Tommy, stop!” I’ve thought o f this inci dent a lot in the wake o f Matthew Shepard’s death, with the revelation that his killers’ girlfriends, two dim bulbs o f American woman hood called “Chastity” and “Kristen,” were accessories after the fact. The truth is that they were accessories before the fact, too, their presence no doubt inflaming the threat the killers per ceived in Matthew’s soft, pink, pretty body. I was once taken roundly to task by a woman friend whose wholly nice and friendly brother tried to hug me after we’d spent a week end at his house. Then as now I could only reply, “I don’t,trust him.” (I should also say that I didn’t fully trust his sister, since for two nights, sharing a bed, I slept with one foot on the floor.) And yes, this is a small ness on my part, a weakness and diminishment that I still insist on as my prerogative. What used to be a daily ter- • ror has become an uneasy truce, a peace that is shat tered completely by a mur der in Wyoming or a smirk on the street. I’m fully pre pared to take responsibility for the distance I keep. What amazes me is the fail ure o f so many people to understand why I keep it. “It isn’t you,” I say to my straight male friends — then silence falls over the chasm.®

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SEVEN DAYS ?

page 2

B y R u t h H o r o w it z

ou may have seen him on Church Street. He wears an over-sized plaid shirt, black jeans, Doc Martens, and dark, wrap-around shades. He’s Totally Cool Ken, and he’s ready to take in a movie with his long-time girlfriend, Barbie. The shopping bag at his feet holds the surprise gift he’s bought her, ju st because. He’s the slim, smooth skinned, steely-eyed essence o f young, All-American manhood. But if you look closer, you’ll notice that the double latte at his elbow is untouched, while the smile on his face seems frozen, as if holding back an angst that’s been building inside him for years. Picking up a pen in his stiff fingers, he writes: Dear Lola, For the last 3 7 years, Ive been dating the girl o f my

And she sneers at the memory p f the passive persona the boy doll displayed compared to his curvaceous counterpart. “He’d give Barbie a ride when she wanted to go somewhere,” the Burlington fifth-grader remem bers. “He was a prop to hold things up. Just another thing to dress.” Sarah Strohmeyer, a reporter at the Valley News and author o f the 1997 parody book, Barbie Unbound, describes how she used to enter tain her four-year-old with schticks based on Ken’s stupidi ty. “Ken would put the bananas in the toaster and she'd laugh and laugh,” the author recalls. “I think my husband thought, what’s the message we’re giving here?” Her answer: “You’re going to be strong and the guys in your life will just be another set o f accessories.” Even at Mattel, Ken’s moth ership, the attitude towards the doll is tellingly dismissive. “If you watch little girls playing with them, you’ll see that Barbie is in charge and Barbie drives the car,” reflects the com pany’s director o f marketing

While Barbie basks in her role as cultural icon Ken is at best ignored, and at worst, dismembered. dreams. But whenever we try to consummate our romance, a bar rier comes between us. Could it be our subconscious fear o f com mitment, or is it the flesh-toned, plastic undies that were perm a nently molded to our bodies when we rolled o ff our assembly lines? Poor Ken. He’s a doll. A prince. A devoted friend who wants nothing more from life than to frolic on a sunny beach or spin his beloved across a gleaming ballroom. But where does it get him? And the intran sigence o f his underpants is just one o f his problems. While Barbie basks in her role as cul tural icon, an image o f ideal femininity that for the last four decades has shaped litde girls’ dreams, Ken is at best ignored, and at worst, dismembered. Callie Krumholz, who’s just turning 11, has outgrown her Barbies. But she still chuckles over the Ken doll who lost his leg when she used him as a gavel in a game o f courtroom.

page 8/ ‘ - SEVEN BAYS '

communications, who is aptly named Lisa McKendall. “Barbie tells Ken what he should wear. It’s an empowering thing for girls.” According to Barbie’s offi cial Web site, www.barbie.com, Ken’s last name is Carson. Read between the lines o f his official resume, and it’s clear that the dolls troubles reach back to 1961, the year he was intro duced. To begin with, Ken Carson didn’t arrive on the scene until two years after the debut o f Barbie Millicent Roberts, aka Barbie. Clearly, in this case, the male was an after thought. But that’s not all. It’s fairly well-known that Barbie was named for the daughter o f Mattel founders Ruth and Elliott Handler. What fewer people realize is that Ken is named for the Handlers’ son. With this odor o f incest hang ing over the molded couple, it’s probably just as well that nei

october 28, 1998*-’

with her role as steady girl ther possesses the capacity to friend. And neither was Mattel. drop trou. Faced with the increasing mainThe original Ken sported a streaming o f feminist ideals and spiffy tux, suitable for taking stung by accusations that she Barbie on a classy date. was, o f all things, a negative Unfortunately, however, the role model for her impression perfect escort had a devastating defect. Ken’s flocked fiber crew- able female fans, Barbie began to expand her horizons some cut readily rubbed off, making him look as if he’d either under time in the early 1980s. The plastic girl who’d always just gone a recent round o f chemo wanted to have fun suddenly therapy or was a lot older than developed an interest in den the nubile young date at his tistry. She joined each branch of side. the armed forces. She opened a After his rough beginnings, petting zoo. She took up gym things started to look up for nastics and N ASCAR racing. Ken. His flocked locks were She reinvented herself as a rock replaced with rooted flax or star and a Boston Celtic, and molded plastic coifs. As more she became the Got Milk? cam and more models hit the mar paign’s best endowed spokesketplace, Ken’s interests become doll. increasingly multifaceted. And But Ken? Throughout all each new avocation was accom Barbie’s changes, he remained panied by another appropriate outfit. In 1962, Tennis Anyone? her faithful escort, when she was willing to have him. Lately, Ken learned that “love” can though, Ken is discovering his have more than one meaning. own needs matter, too. StoodTouch Down Ken went all the up Ken hasn’t been content to way in 1963. Fountain Boy just sit back and wait for Ken, released in 1964, wore a Paleontologist Barbie to bring smart white smock and came home a dinosaur bone. Left to equipped with a tray o f tempt his own devices, he’s been get ing milkshakes in a choice o f ting in touch with his softer strawberry or chocolate. And in side, as well as developing an 1966, Business Appointment avid interest in a tow-headed Ken explored the ins and outs o f office romance with the ever- toddler named Little Tommy. As Big Brother Ken, he slips on lovely Career Girl Barbie. For the next 20 years, what a baby carrier, packs a supply o f diapers, pacifiers, bottles and ever outing Barbie craved, Ken proved a willing — and suitably rattles, and happily romps with the wee lad. As Dr. Ken, he attired — companion. Though buttons up his white coat, slips his wardrobe reflected changing styles in fashion, he retained the on his stethoscope, and cajoles Little Tommy onto his examin same basic set o f personal ing table. And as Father Ken, attributes. As Sun Gold Malibu with Little Tommy as his altar Ken, Tropical Ken, California boy...sorry, just kidding. Dream Ken, and Wet and Wild Big Brother Ken is “really Ken, he was definitely into the great because you dpn’t often beach scene. One look at Great see a male character in a nur Shape Ken, Roller Skating Ken, turing role,” gushes Mattel’s or All Star Marathon Ken with McKendall. “That’s another his chin-length hair, and you really great message for girls to knew that he treated his body get.” Until four years ago, she as a temple. continues, Ken dolls were only Mod Hair Ken from 1973, sold as accessories to different blow-dried, shag-haired, Hot lines o f Barbies. But with the Rockin’ Ken from 1986, and new “stand-alone” models, 1989’s Dance Club Ken proved that the man was hip. As 1964’s backed by their own commer cial segments, the old boy is Goin’ Hunting Ken, Horse Lovin’ Ken in 1982, and 1988’s finally “coming into his own,” she says. Animal Lovin’ Ken — carrying And come into his own he his own cuddly chimp — he has. Despite Mattel’s ongoing was clearly the outdoors type. efforts to control its plastic off And generous? Perfume Giving spring, the fact is that Ken, like Ken included a small bottle o f Barbie, has developed a life o f scent. Pearl Beach Ken bears a his own. N ot long ago, no child-fitting ring that changes doubt inspired by his early color in warm water. And experiments in the Krumholz Prince Ken, in his flashy gold household, Ken surfaced on thigh-highs, red doublet and San Francisco’s Castro Street sweeping blue and gold cape, repackaged as Cross-Dressing comes with a sack o f royal jew Ken. McKendall’s comment? els, token o f his true love for “Sounds like product-tampering Rapunzel Barbie. to me.” Put it all together, and he Last year, Ken and Barbie was one hell o f a guy. made an unauthorized appear ance in “Barbie Girl.” The espite Ken’s apparent per fection and steadfast loyal kitsch dance hit by the Swedish pop group Aqua features a star ty, Barbie wasn’t content

tlingly deep-voiced Ken urging, “Come on Barbie, let’s go party.” Mattel sued the band for infringement o f copyright. “We’re still in legal wrangling, so I can’t comment,” says McKendall. And he’s broken out all over the place between the pages of Barbie Unbound. Strohmeyer describes her book this way: “We took Barbie and placed her in 40 unconventional roles: Sylvia Plath Barbie has her head in the oven. Barbie o f Arc is tied to a stake. Then we took photos.” Though Barbie is, o f course, the dominant player in Strohmeyer’s photos, Ken also plays many significant, and often surprising, roles. In Welfare Queen Barbie, Ken shows up as someone suffering from post-traumatic-stress dis order who spends most o f his time making annoyance calls to utility companies. As J. Edgar Ken, he lounges on a couch in a blue lame outfit with heels and an assortment o f FBI paraphenalia. In a spread entitled, “Let’s Go Navy: Barbie gets her tail hooked,” Barbie gives Ken a good spanking. Strohmeyer has yet to hear from Mattel. She says she’s waiting to see how the company reacts to a Cambridge theater group that’s staging a live version o f Unbound this December.

he possibility that Ken will finally succeed in constructing an identity independent o f Barbie raises exciting prospects for his future. Could Ken make friends — quietly, on his own terms — with flesh-and-blood boys? Absolutely not, according to the folks at Mattel. McKendall describes Ken’s target market as “little girls, aged three to 12. The toy is not targeted fbr boys. It’s still a product marketed for girls. No boys have Kens,” she confident ly asserts. This message has certainly come home to the vast majority o f males. If a boy accuses another boy o f liking Ken dolls or Barbies, explains one young man who insisted on anonymi ty, it’s “the lowest o f the low.” But this attitude is silly, the child continues, because Ken isn’t really all that different from the toys boys are supposed to play with. In fact, he acknowledges, he likes Ken quite a bit. “They’re sort o f like Legos, but more fun because everything’s already built and there are nicer cars,” he says. “The stuff is cool. Give Ken his own T V show and place a gun in his hands, and boys would play with him.” ®

Just a

Once a mere accessory,

K e n breaks out of his mold

October 28 , »;1993 -, - SEVEN‘M W t i l page 9 - . 'VAk“

B y R on P o w er s

ne o f the editors o f this newspaper, who has a mean streak, has asked me to write an essay about men and aging. Her name escapes me at the moment. As does the name o f this newspaper. What was it she wanted me to write about? Oh, men and aging. Why the hell she would expect me to know anything about men and aging is beyond me. She has a mean streak, did I mention that? In my day she would have written her own damn piece about men and aging. In my day they didn’t have women editors in the first place. The hell with it. Its her money. She promised to pay me. One o f those new large-type 20 -dollar bills they brought out, where you can see the face o f Jason Robards as Alexander Hamilton without having to get out a .. .what-do-you-call-it. Where was I? Oh, men and aging. Maybe I mis-heard her. They never speak up now, you know, since they passed the ERA. I was all for it. Equal pay for equal work. Damn, but that Gloria Greer was a fine-looking woman. Maybe she asked me for a piece on lemonading. O r men and paging. I don’t have a hear-

Who me? A reluctant so o n -to -b e senior navigates “ d e n ia l”

ing aid, you know. I can do without one. All right, I have one. I have two, come to think o f it, but I never use them. I get along without them. Get along without what? Twenty-dollar bills? That Robards does a nice job as Alexander Whoozit. N o, hearing aids. I have two. Never use them. I used them once, and I could hear myself digesting food. If a moose broke wind in Lamoille County, I could hear that. Somebody crumpled up a ' Kleenex after blowing their nose, it sounded like a forest fire. I don’t even want to talk about what the nose-blowing was like. The fact is, I can’t remember what the nose-blow ing was like. But it must have been something. Well, men and aging. It must be awful, for the men who have to go through it. Let’s say men in their fifties, for instance. Men who are roughly, oh, 56. Men who are roughly 56 and about to turn 57 pretty soon, like in November. Around the 18th. I wouldn’t know anything about that first hand, being 24 myself, but for the men who have to go through it, it must be awful. Like going over Viagra Falls in a barrel. What must be awful? Nose blowing in a forest fire, I guess.

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SEVEN DAVSJ*’ -V

Isn’t that what we were talking about? And insolent women editors? Or was it insolvent women editors? Never needed a hearing aid. Never been sick a day in my life. This one sure as hell isn’t insolvent. Throwing money around like it grew on trees. Twenty dollars for one essay, which is why I am writ ing this. Only reason. A little nest egg for a rainy day. In case Nixon doesn’t work it out with those wage and price controls. Niagra. I meant to say Niagra Falls. What was it I called those falls? Whatever it was, I meant to say Viagra. I’ve done some research on men and aging, because for 20 dollars o f course you don’t just want to spin something out off the top o f your head, and one o f the things I’ve found out is... Oh, yes, here it is. One o f the things I’ve found out is that men who are aging go through a lot o f denial. Or maybe it says that they go through a lock in the Nile. No, I’m pretty sure — where are those glasses? — no, what it says here is, that’s right, that they go through a lot o f denial. I find that very sad. It is sad when anybody has to go through a lock in the Nile. Or over Viagra Falls in a barrel. What was it we were talking about? Whatever it was, I look

forward confidently to the day when I am a man and aging, because I am certain that I will conduct myself without any recourse to the Nile. At the same time, misper ceptions abound. The other week I had occasion to be back in my hometown in...som e where in the Midwest, and I ran into an old high-school chum, a handsome, robust

likely! I fished out my hearing aid and put it in, and then the other one, and asked him to repeat the question. It took him a few minutes o f thoughtful drooling before he got it back, but he finally did, helpfully amplifying his voice a little, and after he had helped me back to my feet and brushed me off, I realized that what he had asked me was: “Are you retired?”

things I’ve found out is that men who are aging go through a lot o f denial. O r did I men tion that already? The last thing I want to say in this research essay about men on the Nile who are going through the Viagra like there was no tomorrow, which there may not be too many o f any way because they are men and aging, is this:

Well, men and aging. It must be awful, for the men who have to go through it. Let’s say men in their fifties, for instance. Men who are roughly, oh, 56. Men who are roughly 56 and about to turn 57 pretty soon, like in November. Around the 18th. young rake who was, just at that moment, unaccountably disguised as a pathetic, chinless and balding old coot. The first thing he said to me after we had exchanged witty badinage was: “Are you tired?” I thought that was an extremely nitwitted question to be asked by someone who has not seen you in about 30 years, even though you are only 24. D id I look tired? Not bloody

I’d hate to even imagine what I might have done to this trashmouth artist, this insolent, insolvent woman editor, if I had been the sensitive type, or going through a lock in the cabinet where the Viagra is stored. As it was, I thought the measured, reasonable response was simply to punch him in the goddam mouth. But I pulled something on my backswing, and had to let it go. One o f the

It is this. Right. I’ve got it now. Here is what it is. Men who are men and aging are often the victims o f thoughdess^stereotyping and instances o f ageism in the mass media and by the bank where I have an account. I will skip through the mass media because the examples are too numerous to elucidate here on a fee o f 20 dollars, even though I appreciate the large-

size type and die work o f ^ S h £ Robards in promoting the cause o f men who are not yet aging. ^ But I do have this to say about the warthogs at the bank where I have an account, and you know who you are, and I have connections in high places who will make you sorry for what you have done (signed) Angry Taxpayer. It is this. N ot too long ago you sent me an application form for the Horizon Club. It’s some damn discount plan for Senior... Sen .. .Ssssss.. .1 can’t say it. O f course I am not even close to being a Senior... Sen .. .Ssssss.. .But forget that. That isn’t what bothers me the most. What bothers me the most is that name: “Horizon Club.” Well, actually it’s that word, “Horizon.” You see, the last thing we 24-year-olds who are on the Nile want to think about is the goddam horizon. O r would be, if we were in any way sensitive or going through denial. WTiich o f course we are not. I have to stop now. Some woman editor with a mean streak wanted me to write an essay on something, if I can only think what it was. ®

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1. BEAUTY OF THE BEAST: SHOW OS WHY YOOR POOCH IS PERFECT, YOUR CAT THE CUTEST^ANP TEU. OS W HY YOOR PET SHOOLO PE MR. OR M S. ANIMAL MAGNETISM. 2. FAT CATS: SENP |N A PHOTO OF YOOR F0U.-P0DIEP FEllNE ALONG WITH A TELL-AU OF ITS TABLE MANNERS OR TEMPERAMENT. 3. PET N A M ES: ANIM AL LOVERS OFTEN PREFER PEC0UAR NOM PE PLOMES. SHARE THE STORY OF YOOR P ET S 0N0S0AL NAME—ANP PHOTO, TOO. 4 . SEPARATED AT BIRTH : P0 YOO LOOK IIICE YOOR PET? SENP OS A SAMPLE OF THE EVlPENCE ANP A SHORT REPORT OF SHAREO FEATURES. 5. PET PEEVES: SOMETIMES PET5 TURN INTO PESTS. SHARE A W AGGISH TALE OF WOE, ANP A PORTRAIT OF THE CULPRIT. t>. HAUTE CREATURE: THE MOST IMPRESSlYE/ONlQOE POSSESSION FOR PAMPERED PETS. SENP A P|C OF THE PRIMA PONNA PRODUCT ANP ITS CONTENTEP CONSUMER. 7 . UNLEASHED: USE YOOR IMAGINATION—ANY ANIMAL DOING ANYTHING IS WELCOME IN THIS WIPE-OPEN CATEGORY. PROVIDE PICTURE ANP PLOTUNE. PLEASE.

Deadline for submissions is October 30. Include your name, pet's name, address and phone number. Send S.A.S.E., too, if you want the photo returned. Send to: SEVEN DAYS, Attn: Paw Prints Contest P.O. Box 1164, Burlington, VT 05402. Paw Prints will leave its mark November 4. page 12

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Terrence W e b s te r-D o yle w an ts you to w in your next fig h t h an d s-d ow n B y E r ik E s c k i l s e n ey. Tough guy. I ’m thinking Terrence Webster-Doyle could kick your >our ass. The former bouncer stands 6-foot-3, weighs in at 2 5 0 pounds and has 3 7 years o f m artial arts study under his black belt. Lucky fo r you, though, he probably wont. But WebsterDoyle is not afraid o f you, no sir. And i f you figh t him, he’s gonna win. He ju st won’t have to kick your ass to do it. In fact, he prob ably won’t even have to touch you. If you’re thinking Terrence Webster-Doyle must have a secret weapon, you’re right...sort of. It’s not really that secret. In fact, it’s some thing most o f us have heard before — probably from our mothers. As he puts it, “The winner o f the fight is the one who avoids it.” The big differ ence is that this guy really believes it. , Getting other people to believe is the mission o f the ' M iddleb ury -b^d Atrium

Society, the “conflict education’ organization Webster-Doyle runs with his wife Jean. The couple, from New York by way o f California, moved to Middlebury and established Atrium in 1990. Guided by the idea that conflict is caused by psychologi cal and biological conditioning, Atrium’s programs for kids and adults use role-playing and edu

er makes you pick fights. For those inclined toward flight, it means having the presence o f mind to hold your ground and still come away a winner. Webster-Doyle’s credentials go beyond his black belt. A holder o f post-doctorate degrees in Education and Psychology, he has published some 15 books on conflict, education and the martial arts, including

“ There are more alterna tives than to fight or run away. We’ re just not taught them.”

MASKS & MAKE-UP

— Terrence Webster-Doyle cational materials to expose conflict’s psychological aspects, while martial arts training develops the confidence to tran scend the biological “fight or flight” impulse. For bullies, the end result is being able to ; , ,

the acclaimed Karate — The Art o f Empty Self, Fighting the Invisible Enemy and Why Is Everybody Always Picking on M e? Still, many educators might question the pedagogical soundness o f Atrium’s confiL v -AY

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Thursday October 29,7pm UVM Billings Theater, Burlington More difficult and more dangerous than Mount Everest, K2 with its remote beauty became a dream mountain for Kurt Diemberger and his friend and climbing partner, Julie Tullis. After many attempts, they finally trod the summit snows together in 1986. Tragically, Julie died on the way down, victim o f a vicious high altitude storm which also killed four other mountaineers. Kurt Diemberger is famous for his K2 expeditions and being the only person alive to nave made first ascents of two o f the world s 8,000 meter peaks (Broad Peak in 1957 & Dhaulagiri in 1960).__________

OPEN FOR LUNCH M O N D A Y - FRIDAY

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Group Fitness YM CA A e ro b ic C la s s P ass Step, Aerobic Blast, Absolutely Abs ft more plus classes at the YMCA at Essex. 9 wks. for $89.( Free) B .A .M . Boxing and Martial arts workout using upper body moves and kicks. Thursdays, 9 9:55 am. $30 ($24) Yoga At 266 College St: Tuesdays, 9-9:55 am, $65 ($56) At Edmunds Elementary: Thursdays, 5:30 - 6:30 pm. $36 ($24) Nov. 12 - Dec. 18. Physical M in d C la s s (Pilates)Thursdays, 6-6:55 pm. $30 ($24) S u p e r S tr e tc h . Relaxing ft elongating movement. Thursdays, 6:05-7 am. $30 ($20).

A m e ric a n S ty le /S w in g Level II Fine tune your technique while increasing your step repertoire. For those who have taken a Level I course. Nov. 14-Dec. 19. Saturdays, 4:305:30 pm. $79 per couple. ($65). A fric a n A m e ric a n J a z z A mixture of American-styie jazz and African-style jazz. Nov. 15-Dec. 20. Sundays, noon -1 pm. $38 ($30)

T u m b le & S p la s h Back-to-back classes for you and your child. First, go to the gym for creative movement and tumbling, then head to the pool for a swim lesson. Group I: Ages 2 8 3 w/parent. Saturdays, 11 am - noon. $62 ($42). Group II: Ages 3-5. Saturdays, 11:30 am-12:30 pm. $65 ($50).

Basketball

S p la s h A T o n e Low-impact workout focuses on tension release, strengthening, flexibility, toning and endurance. Tue/Thur, 9 - 1 0 am. $70 (Free) Tue/Thur, 6:30 - 7:30 pm. $62($44) W a t e r A e ro b ic s Fast-paced aerobic workout increases cardiovascular strength and endurance. Mon/Wed/Fri. 6:15 - 7:15 am $85 (Free) Mon/Wed. 6-7 pm. $70 ($49). F it'n 'F u n A great cardiovascular workout in the water followed by heart-pumping water games. Tue/Thu. 6:15 - 7:15 am. $62(Free) W a t e r A e ro b ic s a n d F it'n 'F u n C o m b o Work out every morning, $85 (Free) A r th ritis W a t e r E x e rc is e Offered in collaboration with the Arthritis Foundation, those with arthritis or similar ailments participate in gentle exercises in our 86° pool to help decrease pain and stiffness. Attend any of these classes for $80 ($50) : Mon -Fri. 1-2 pm, Tue/Thu. 8 - 9 am.

C o-ed Youth Clinio Boys 6 girls ages 7-10 learn the fundamentals of basketball through fun drills and practice games. Fee includes tshirt. Saturdays, 1:45-3:55 pm. $35 ($20). M e n 's B a s k e tb a ll L eag ue Two divisions, 20 teams of up to 12 players. Nov. 3-Apr. 6. Tues/Thurs/Fri: 7:05-10 pm. Team fee; $500. Contact Kevin Hatin at 862-9622. 3 -o n -3 B a s k e tb a ll L eag ue Eight teams of adults play 20 minute halves. Runs Nov. 29Jan. 17. Sundays, 5-7 pm. $30/player ($20).

MartialArts K ids In K a ra te Ages 7 and up, adults welcome. Develop endurance, coordination, strength 8 flexability. Tue/Thu 4 -5:15, $63 ($47) T a i Chi An ancient oriental practice that unites spirit, mind 8 body. Appropriate for all ages and fitness levels. Tue/Thu, 8 - 9 am $67 ($50) K ickbo xing Basic skills of punching, kicking, blocking and use of the heavy bag. No full contact. A great whole-body exercise. Wednesdays, 6:45-8:15 pm. $38 ($28)

Pre & Post-natal

A ctive O lder A dults

P r e n a ta l W a t e r E x e rc is e For pregnant and postpartum wom en, safe exercises to relieve lower back pain and swelling, as well as maintain muscle tone and increase circulation. Mon/W ed. 7-8 pm. $70 ($49) M o m m y A M e A movement class that's a great way for you and your 12 - 30-month-old to socialize. Dance, songs and use of gym equipment. Thurs-days, 9-9:50 am. $42($28)

S ilv e r Foxes Moderately-paced, co-ed exercise class for those over 50. Socialize and exercise to improve cardiovascular fitness, muscle tone, joint flexibility and overall mobility. Includes land exercise followed by optional water exercise. Mon/Wed/Fri, 8 - 9:30 am. Gym only, ends at 8:50 am, $68 ($64) Both gym and pool, $80 ($54) N e v e r-T o o -L a te -N au tilu s Strength training for folks over 50. A personalized program improves strength and energy levels, eases arthritis pain and build s strong bones. Tue/Fri, 9 -10 am. $50 ($33)

Gymnastics & Dance L ittle G y m le s (12 mos • 3 yrs., w / parent) Children explore hoops, balls, beam and more. Saturdays, 9:05-9:35 am. $42($25). Tiny T u m b le rs (4-5 yrs., w / parent) Preschool gymnastics class with tumbling and movement. Saturdays, 9:40 10:10 am. $42 ($25) B e g in n e r G y m n a s tic s (6-12 yrs.) Use of beam, vault, rings and tumbling. Thursdays, 3-4 pm, and Saturdays, 10:1511:05 am. $59 ($34). C h ild 's C r e a tiv e D a n e s Ages 3-5 yrs. explore movement and the elements of dance.. Wednesdays, 2:45-3:30 pm. $48 ($32) A d u lt M o d e m D a n c e Discover the basics of modem dance, including balance turning, rhythm, kicks, partnering and expression. Thursdays, 7-8 pm. $59 ($48)

By G len n S ev er a n c e

A Slide Show & Talk by M o u n ta in e e r/ F ilm -m a k e r Kurt D ie m b e rg e r

(Member fees in parentheses)

Of*-?

Swim Lessons The YMCA offers swim lessons for people of all ages. For information on times and fees, please call 862-9622. Classes include parent/child classes for ages 6 months to 5 years, classes for independent swimmers ages 3 - 5 years, youth swim classes for ages six and older, teen swim lessons and adult lessons.

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guys got to be prepared, right? In my family, a lit tle lesson from D ad went a long, long way. He must have seen it as his life’s purpose, because he turned them — lessons, that is — out like a factory. To him it wasn’t just advice; it was a tirelessly con stant, selfless education aimed to prepare his son with the fun damental building blocks o f true manhood. A man created in his image. A Severance man. A man prepared. There were the basics, o f course: “Close the back door, we don’t live in a barn.” Nothing drove that point home like having to practice opening and closing the back door 10, 20 times in a row for having left it open. When I was about five I had a hard time keeping my hands out o f my pants. “Leave it alone, it’ll grow on its own,” he instructed repeatedly. O f course, at five, I didn’t under stand. But at 15 it became my mantra, if you know what I mean. The birds and the bees were a breeze: “It doesn’t have to be all the way in to get preg nant” was always followed with, “Don’t tell your mother that one.” “Nobody likes a wise-ass,” was simple enough to under stand, but some pearls were lost on me at the time. Ones like, “It’s all right to cry when you find out your girlfriend just got engaged,” or “You can pick your nose, you can pick your friends, but you can’t pick your friend’s nose.” Sometimes, my father got a bit carried away in his lessons. He was a paratrooper in the Army and must have figured it would behoove a small boy to learn how to jum p out o f an airplane. I was eight and going through jump school. I liked it, though. The idea o f falling out o f the sky wearing a bunch o f Army gear was heavenly. We practiced hanging o ff the wing, counting to one-thousand-three before pulling the rip-cord, and the all important tuck-and-roll landing. We practiced jum ping o ff the backyard picnic table. I got pretty good, too. I could tuck and roll all day long. I showed o ff to friends, and thought it strange that their fathers hadn’t taught them parachute landings. But, Dad, I asked, what did it feel like to land? Like jum ping o ff the garage roof, came the response. When I got good enough, I could try it, he said. That was an open invitation only a fool could resist. G ood enough or not, I was ready. So one day, while M om and a lady friend o f hers were hav-

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An Am sterdam encounter proves you c a n ’t be prepared for everything ing coffee in the kitchen and Dad was off at work, I was up on the roof readying to jump. Word traveled pretty fast around my neighborhood in those days, and within a few minutes a semicircle o f kids had formed below to watch. There was 20 bucks in it for me if I pulled it off. Jump. “Come on, do it. Jum p.” “Ah, he won’t do it.” Like hell I wouldn’t. The jumping part was a cinch, but the tuck-and-roll part must have escaped me, because I hit the ground in a heap and a holler. When the tears began to roll, my supporters scattered quicker than if they’d been called for dinner. Blubbering, I warily confessed to my mother what I had done, and who put me up to it. I broke my foot, but Dad took the fall. I never saw the money. So that was a little lesson for the both o f us. A man who prepares for all inevitably cannot be prepared for everything. And there was one situation my old man’s insight never saw coming. After graduation, I did the post-college-travel-Europe bit with four friends. It was your basic “spend your parents’ money in a last-ditch effort to defer what would unavoidably become your life.” First stop, Amsterdam. Because every American college kid knows of Amsterdam’s legendary charms, and we would not leave our Xanadu waiting. Day three, and the legend proved true. Sometime between the second and seventh joint o f the day — so I’d guess it could n’t have been much later than 11 a.m. — one o f the sharper crayons I was traveling with sold the rest o f us on the idea o f a live sex show. It wasn’t exactly the life-enriching experi ence the ’rents thought they

were paying for, but how sinis ter could it be if Let’s Go Europe declared it an Amsterdam “must-do” — right between the Anne Frank house and the tulip tours? When in Rom e... We dropped 20 guilders each for the cheapest matinee show we could find, which, in hindsight, was probably our first mistake. According to the barker out front o f Madame Rosa’s, this would be “no fuckin’ Disneyland!” Those who think a live sex show means continuous debauchery attended by ogling, dirty old men apparently haven’t been to one. That’s

her heart, dragged an audience member onto the stage, squat ted over him with a magic marker and, with a few calibrat ed motions o f the pelvis, wrote “I Love You” across his chest. The third girl was a bony Dutch lass who, compared to the first two, was quite a looker. She danced. She stripped. We began to pay attention. At the edge o f the stage she stretched one long finger out at me and curled it back to her. I pointed back at myself and mouthed, “Me?” Yes, you. I try to make it a rule never to say no to a naked girl but even my worst judgment was

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exception for this one. what we had thought, too. But this one was more comedy than sex — a series o f stripteases highlighted by awkward gim micks and tricks. Hardly stimu lating. The audience was packs o f guys, girls and couples — young and old — herded around a stage in an offBroadway-type theater. It was mostly tourists who came just to say they had done it. We headed for the bar. The concept o f a live sex show was simple enough to fol low: Each girl came onstage, danced around, took off her clothes, then fished out a prop from a velvet pouch she brought with her to highlight her routine. The first girl per formed acrobatics with a lit candle. The second girl, bless

telling me I should make an exception for this one. Judgment was no match for hooting friends who could think o f nothing more enter taining than to see a buddy humiliated. One tough-love shove o ff my barstool and I was stumbling up the stage steps. “Please, I don’t want to do this,” I whispered when she met me at the edge o f the stage. “I don’t understand English.” “Well, at least be gentle.” “We’ll see.” She shimmied and shook around me while I bobbed my head to the Euro-techno trash blaring from the speakers. I tried to enjoy myself. I even tried to dance with her, really I Clothes for Men & Women In the Cornerstone Building @ Battery and Main Street Open daily, 11-7 865-7910

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By P a m ela P o ls to n hen he took on the general managers job at W VNY-TV this summer, Larry Delia walked into the biggest job o f his life. The 30-year-old station had changed ownership, and the time was ripe for a new direc tion. Delia was handed the steering wheel. “I’m in charge o f operating the station and determining its future,” he says. The 36-year-old from Long Island cut his teeth on “all the jobs” at a Fox station in Connecticut before moving to Burlington in June. But for all his responsibility, there’s one phone call that can make him drop everything and head for home: the babysitters. Delias a single dad. And as much as he loves his job, his first priority is a pair o f lovely little dark-haired girls: Nicole, five, and Jennifer, two. Delias entry into single par enthood came tragically and unexpectedly, with the death o f his wife Sue to cancer earlier this year. He describes himself as a “contemporary dad” — the kind who’s unafraid o f chang ing diapers, getting up at night to comfort a teething tot, nego tiating car seats, and helping with the myriad errands involved in raising children.

“Had I not done this before,” he says, “the transition would have been incredible. The biggest difference is, although I did my share, the bottom line was always my wife.” Things like buying clothes or dealing with schooling, Delia notes, were Sue’s domain. “I thought, ‘uh-oh, I should have paid more attention.’ Now I’m making all the decisions — I’m thinking 100 percent o f my children.” Going it alone — which far more mothers than fathers typi-

Free advice comes from all quarters, Delia acknowledges — including from some who assume a man doesn’t know how to nurture. cally experience — is difficult enough without also grieving the loss o f a spouse and explaining it to the kids. But Delia credits his girls with mak ing the loss somehow more bearable. “Going through what I went through, you’d think it would have been easier without the kids. Then you realize it’s the kids that get you through.” Just a few weeks ago, Delia found a daily caregiver who comes to their house in

Williston with her own threeyear-old son. But prior to that, Nicole and Jennifer were in a daycare center, which, as every parent knows, passes around colds like graham crackers. “I’d get a call every two weeks at the worst moment,” he says. “It’s a germ factory.” Now, with Nicole in preschool half a day and Jennifer at home with a play mate, Delia breathes a little eas ier — but only a little. He still describes his day as a blur o f activity. “The morning dash is familiar to many parents, but with just one o f us, it’s a race,” he says. “Getting them dressed, fed, getting to school. You get to work and you’re tired already.” Sitting in his spacious office one recent afternoon, Delia seems less tired than relaxed and focused, as if he’s learned, from spending so much time with small children, the art o f being in the present and attend ing to what’s before him — be it tying small shoes, responding to an interviewer or running a T V station. “My pediatrician said I’m doing a good job,” Delia notes with an air o f relief. “I said, you do what you have to do.’ You have no choice.” N ot every single parent,

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SEVEN’ DAYS; ,

octQber 20; 1.098 ^

Do relationships have a sporting chance? B y F l ip B r o w n

friend o f mine once told me about the time he made it down to Sugarbush early in the morning after a particularly nice dump o f fresh powder. He was stand ing around waiting for the Castle Rock chair that would transport around 20 early-birds ' — all male — up to the famous trails that twist and plunge down some o f the best terrain in the East. Another guy leaned over to him and said sar castically, “Great place to meet women, huh?” Whether it’s skiing, sailing, backpacking, windsurfing, mountain biking, skydiving, snowboarding, rock climbing or whitewater kayaking, certain sports seem to attract a dispro portionate number o f males. So what is it with guys? Why are so many o f us always looking for a rush, a challenge, a sense o f accomplishment with a vision o f glory? W hats the attraction to flirting with disas ter, playing with the edge of control, going hell-bent-forleather? Certainly many inquir ing female minds would like to know. The reasons men are so invested in playtime may or may not seem obvious. “If it feels good, do it” — or the shortened, overused marketing slogan o f “Just do it” — may suffice for some, if not their partners or spouses. Still, there may be some deeper explana tions why so many “manly men” are compelled to be adventurous. Boys are taught early to “go out and play,” which can lead to what Harvard psychologist Stephen J. Berman describes as “male relational dread.” “Prompted by the father and the male image in the culture, the boy is heavily pressured to disconnect in order to achieve maleness. It is a turning away from the process o f connec tion,” Berman writes in Mens Psychological Development: A Relational Perspective. No won der some men don’t know when to quit — nor how to communicate. Many a domestic argument has started over the surprise

golf outing, or the need to grab the windsurfer when a breeze comes up, regardless o f the plans or needs or others. Swiss psychologist Carl Jung discusses the stages o f a man’s life in The Structure and Dynamics o f the Psyche. “The very frequent neu rotic disturbances o f adult years all have one thing in common,” he writes. “They want to carry the psychology o f the youthful phase over the threshold o f the so-called years o f discretion.” If men try to retain — or prove — youthfulness longer than they ought, play nonethe less serves a valuable function in adult men’s lives. While that line o f reasoning may sound like a convenient rationaliza tion, most men would nod in agreement. “In sports, many o f the usual prohibitions on males are lifted,” writes San Francisco therapist Bernie Zilbergeld, who specializes in working with heterosexual couples around issues o f sexuality. “Sports is one o f the few places where men can safely become boys again, where they can drop the fa£ade o f Mr. Uptight-and-inControl and just play,” he says in The New M ale Sexuality. “Sports, whether watching or participating, is one o f the few places that adult men display expressiveness and playfulness. Is it any wonder they love it SO ?

Zilbergeld has made an interesting observation about the form and structure o f adult play. Men generally prefer “side-by-side intimacy,” as opposed to the expectation o f “face-to-face intimacy,” noting in sports that have a face-toface stance, like football, hock ey or fencing, the “other” is the enemy, not the collaborator. “Shared activities, not personal discussion, is the main theme,” he writes. Hollywood instinctively exploits this with the so-called “buddy film.” Driving, chasing bad guys, riding horses, sitting on the starship command deck, shooting at enemy solders, ter rorists, mafiosi, etc., are all “side-by-side” set-ups. The motto could be “Stand beside me, and I can count on you,” not “When this thing is over,

NOVEMBER

we’ll have a good talk, cry or processing session.” This phenomenon is com mon in counseling as well, and speaks volumes about commu nication between the sexes. Couples therapy takes a turn for the positive when the male and female antagonists start taking walks together, therapists have noted. Some form o f physical activity seems to bal ance their tense “across-thetable” discussions with a lessthreatening side-by-side talk. Thus, side-by-side relatedness is a context that guys are most comfortable with, whether or not it’s sports-specific — useful information for their female counterparts. A local therapist I know reports that when he talks to active men about the disap pointments in their relation ships, a common complaint is that “she doesn’t do things with me.” The implication is that without some “doing,” the part nership lacks a necessary matrix for sharing and communica tion. This is not to say that men don’t need improvement in emotional awareness, com munication skills, and active lis tening; it’s just that certain con texts appear to put them more at ease to do so. Author and therapist John Gray, who has beaten the MarsVenus analogy into the ground — and profited handsomely from franchising the whole deal — has helped many men and

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women with his generalizations about gender differences. Men “are always doing things to prove themselves and develop their power and skills,” he writes in Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. “They experience fulfillment primarily through success and accom plishments. They are more interested in outdoor activities.” While the world o f sports gives participants and fans a sense o f belonging — witness the ubiquitous baseball cap — it doesn’t do much for intimate communication. Team sports play into the “us vs. them” mentality in a world where expectations — women’s expec tations, anyway — o f male gen der roles are increasingly blurry. Solo sports, meanwhile, provide the opportunity to assert individuality on our terms, not those o f the boss, the wife or the bank. But some times carving out our identity sometimes starts to cut us off from others. It doesn’t help that the Great American Culture consis tently drives home the message that gentleness, stillness and vulnerability are not what other men respect and women value. Have you ever seen a television ad for a pickup truck or sportutility vehicle that doesn’t appear to be driven by a maniac? The danger in going too far in the “sensitive” direction is ending up a “soft male,” as Robert Bly and others have

termed it. Acquiesce too much, and one gives up a necessary sense o f self. Stop playing, and one gets far too serious. Good advice for either gender, actual-

!yBut men don’t get many good role models for how to be adventurous, yet still connect ed. We don’t have an instruc

Men generally prefer “ sideby-side intim acy,” as opposed to the expectation of “ face-to-face intim acy.” tion manual on how to be an appropriately “playful” man as we reach the new millennium. While women had their options expanded beginning in the ’60s and ’70s, for men the process o f role redefinition has lagged sig nificantly behind.

from mentors like counselors, “coaches,” both literal and figu rative, and other men he admires. And if that doesn’t work, he can always ask a woman — during a time out, o f course. (Z)

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V erm ont’ s sole m ohel w e ig h s in on the su bject of c irc u m cisio n

By S arah V an A

r s d a le

ou can now get a good loaf o f challah at a couple o f local bakeries, and bagel shops abound in Burlington, but the state o f Vermont isn’t known for having a huge Jewish community. In fact, there is just one cantor in the state, and only one person who serves as a mohel — the man who performs circumci sions for Jewish newborns. Dr. Ira Bernstein, an obste trician-gynecologist at Fletcher Allen Health Care, also per forms the procedure on nonJewish newborns. But it’s with Jewish families who don’t strict ly practice Judaism that Bernstein sees a deep conflict between the contemporary sec ular world and the traditional religious world. “The internal struggle is definitely harder for Jewish couples, who have all the same social pressures, and are likely to have contact with people who are strongly against cir

cumcision,” Bernstein says. Many couples now having babies were born and raised at a time when circumcision was a given: From the 1950s into the 1970s, the procedure was done as a matter o f course for Jews and non-Jews alike. The germ theory and the polio vaccine ushered in the era o f the new god, Medicine, in which par ents across the United States were willing to put their unbri dled trust. With the “question authori ty” climate o f the late 1960s, however, people began to shy away from medical interven tion, and to ask whether proce dures such as circumcision were really necessary. In addition, the prevalence o f “female circumci sion” in some African nations — the excision o f the clitoris in pubescent girls, which leaves them unable to experience sex ual pleasure — was also coming to light in the West at about the same time. Outrage over this may have fueled the debate over the necessity o f circumci-

sion for boys, Bernstein says — though the procedure clearly doesn’t have the same life-long effects. Unfortunately for many parents trying to research the risks versus the benefits o f cir cumcision, Bernstein adds, there still aren’t enough data available to make a convincing argument, on medical grounds alone, either for or against it. In the end, the parents’ philoso phy, religious beliefs and aes thetic preferences still deter mine their choice. Laura Summer, a local mother who did not have her son circumcised, says the deci sion wasn’t that difficult because she isn’t Jewish. “Without a compelling reli gious reason, why would I cut off a piece o f my infant child’s body?” she reasons. A former nurse-midwife, Summer had helped many cou ples decide about circumcision, and still believes that “the par ents’ feeling comfortable about their decision was more impor tant than what the actual deci sion was.” When her own son was born, she never considered cir cumcising him. “The babies are so sensitive in their first weeks that they startle every time you take them from their blanket,” she says, “so it seems cutting a part o f their body would be traumatic.” As with any medical proce dure, one must look at whether the potential benefits outweigh the potential risks. The risks o f the circumcision include those that always attend the use o f a local anesthetic — such as infection from the needle — possible injury during the pro

cedure, and possible excess blood loss. The benefits include lower rates o f long-term urinary tract infections, penile cancer, sexually transmitted diseases,

“ Without a compelling religious rea son, why would I cut off a piece of my infant child’s body?” — Laura Summer

including HIV, and lower inci dence o f cervical cancer in the female partners o f circumcised men. For Jewish parents, the deci

o f Judaism. In fact, circumci sion is so much a part o f Judaism that when a circum cised man converts to Judaism, a ritual drop o f blood is taken

sion to circumcise is layered with conflict about adhering to religious law. Jews living in a place without a large Jewish community can find observance of Jewish tradition to be a tricky business. Some Vermont Jews are Orthodox, while others never attend synagogue, but all still feel the weight o f history and heritage opposing the cur rent trend against circumcision. For many Jews, circumci sion is a way to ensure that their sons will take their place in the lineage of Jewish families, as circumcision is seen as a commandment from God, something one must do in order to fulfill the requirements

to take the place o f his secular circumcision. For Natalie Neuert, circum cising her first son, Harry, was a decision very much based in her Judaism, even though she does n’t belong to a synagogue and her husband, Ed, is not Jewish. “It was an important cultur al decision to do it as a Jew,” she says. “There are very few things that link Harry back; he doesn’t speak Yiddish, for exam ple. Circumcision links all Jewish men back to Abraham and Isaac.” According to Jewish law, the circumcision should be per formed on the eighth day after birth, but Neuert had the pro

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cedure done in the hospital shortly after birth, as many new parents do. When the time came to actually perform the circumcision, Neuert concedes she found it difficult to be “holding this perfect infant in my arms and someone’s about to cut o ff a part o f his body,” but her strong feelings about Judaism helped her through it. As the closest thing Vermont has to a mohel, Bernstein’s got the medical training and experience — hav ing performed roughly a thou sand circumcisions — but has n’t completed training at what he calls umohel school,” which would allow him to say the prayers necessary to fulfill the religious requirements. Instead, when performing a Jewish cir cumcision, Bernstein says just one short prayer acknowledging G od’s commandment and the fulfillment o f it. If the new parents want a religious ceremony, they also ask a rabbi and/or cantor to attend. Some families actually hold the circumcision at the synagogue or in the home, rather than at the hospital. Neuert, now pregnant with her second son, soon will be choosing circumcision again — though not “because God will smite me down if I don’t,” and not because o f health reasons, she says, but because o f the power o f tradition. “I could be a totally nonreligious Jew, but if I had these sons in Germany in the 1940s, they would take them away from me,” she said. “This is a physical manifestation o f a cul tural and religious history.” @

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. October.28, .1998

SEVEN DAYS

page 21

sOUnd Advice 28

where to go

SH A KE YO U R LO V EM A K ER S

Cherry Poppin' Daddies insist

they’re not a retro thing — instead, they’re reinventing swing. Okay, whatever, but it’s still about the heppest hop happening. Eugene, Oregon’s Daddies also booted out grunge with a Zoot Suit Riot. The gym’s the place to be this Tuesday — UVM ’s Patrick Gym, with Colombia’s Ozomatli and ska-bobs The Pietasters.

DIVINE M A D N ESS This here power-emo-pop trio hails from upstate New York, but borrow Australian slang for their name — a “ sheila” is, basically, a wuss. But The Sheila Divine don't pussyfoot around musically. Aaron Perrino's vocals alone send chills up the old spine — and it’s got nothing to do with Halloween. Divine the action this Thursday at Toast, with The Halogens and Orbit.

A fter Dark M usic S eries, Knights of Columbus H a ll, M idd le bu ry, 3 8 8 -0 2 1 6 . A lley-C ats, 41 King St., B url., 6 6 0 -4 3 0 4 . Amigos Cantina, 4 M erchants Row, M id d le iiu ry, 3 8 8 -3 6 2 4 . Backstage Pub, 6 0 Pearl St., Essex Jet., 8 7 8 -5 4 9 4 . Boony's. Rt. 2 3 6 , Franklin, 9 3 3 -4 5 6 9 . Borders Books & M u sic, 2 9 Church St., B u rlin gto n, 8 6 5 -2 7 1 1 . B rew ski, Rt. 108, Je ffe rso nville , 6 4 4 -5 4 3 2 . BU Emporium , B ellw ood Shpg. Ctr., C olchester, 6 5 8 -4 2 9 2 . Cactus Cafe, 1 Lawson Ln., B url., 8 6 2 -6 9 0 0 . Cafe Banditos, M ountain Rd., Je ffe rso nville , 6 4 4 -8 8 8 4 . Cafe Ole, North Common, Chelsea, 6 8 5 -2 1 7 3 . Cafe S w ift House, 2 5 S tew art Lane, M idd le bu ry, 3 8 8 -9 9 2 5 . Cambridge Coffee House, S m ugglers' Notch Inn, J e ffe rso n ville , 6 4 4 -2 2 3 3 . C harlie O’s, 7 0 M ain St., M o n tp e lie r. 2 2 3 -6 8 2 0 . Cheers, 5 2 0 Shelburne Rd., S. B urlin gto n, 8 6 0 -1 5 0 1 . C hicken Bone, 4 3 King St., B urlin gto n, 8 6 4 -9 6 7 4 . Chow! B ella, 2 8 N. Mam St.. St. Albans, 5 2 4 -1 4 0 5 . Clover House Pub, 4 2 Church Rd., C olchester, 8 6 0 -3 6 3 1 . Club M etronom e, 188 M ain St., B urlin gto n, 8 6 5 -4 5 6 3 . Club Toast, 165 Church, B urlin gto n, 6 6 0 -2 0 8 8 . Cobbweb, S andybirch Rd., Georgia, 5 2 7 -7 0 0 0 . Deerleap Books, 2 5 Mam St., B risto l, 4 5 3 -5 6 8 4 . Diamond Jim's G rille, H ighgate Comm. Shpg. Ctr., St. Albans, 5 2 4 -9 2 8 0 . Dubie's Cafe, 160 N. W ino oski Ave., B urlin gto n, 6 5 8 -0 6 9 3 . Edgewater Pub, 3 4 0 M a lle tts Bay Ave., Colchester, 8 6 5 -4 2 1 4 . Emerald City, 114 River St., M o n tp e lie r, 2 2 3 -7 0 0 7 . Extreme Sports Bar/Dance Club, Lakeshore Dr., M a lle tts Bay, 8 6 4 -8 3 3 2 . Franny O's 7 3 3 Queen City Pk. Rd., B urlin gto n, 8 6 3 -2 9 0 9 . G allagher's, Rt. 100 & 17, W a its fie ld , 4 9 6 -8 8 0 0 . G iorgio's Cafe, Tucker H ill Lodge, Rt. 17, W a its fie ld , 4 9 6 -3 9 8 3 . Good Times Cafe, Hinesburg V illa g e , Rt. 116, 4 8 2 -4 4 4 4 . G reatful Bread, 6 5 Pearl St., Essex Jet., 8 7 8 -4 4 6 6 . Ground Round, 1 63 3 W illis to n Rd., S. B urlin gto n, 8 6 2 -1 1 2 2 . H alvorson's, 16 Church St., B urlin gto n, 6 5 8 -0 2 7 8 . Henry's, H oliday Inn, 106 8 W illis to n Rd., S. B u rlin gto n, 8 6 3 -6 3 6 1 . Higher Ground, 1 M ain St., W in o o ski, 6 5 4 -8 8 8 8 . Horn of the Moon Cafe, 8 Langdon St., M o n tp e lie r, 2 2 3 -2 8 9 5 . Jake's, 1 23 3 S helburne Rd., S. B urlington, 6 5 8 -2 2 5 1 . J.P.'s Pub, 1 39 M am St., B urlin gto n, 6 5 8 -6 3 8 9 . LaB rioche, 8 9 M ain St., M o n tp e lie r, 2 2 9 -0 4 4 3 . Last Chance S aloon, 147 M ain, B urlin gto n, 8 6 2 -5 1 5 9 . Leunig's, 115 Church St., B urlin gto n, 8 6 3 -3 7 5 9 . Live Art at the Barre Opera House, Barre, (sch e du le ) 8 8 3 -9 3 0 7 ; (tic k e ts ) 4 7 6 -8 1 8 8 . Mad M ountain Tavern, Rt. 100, W a its fie ld , 4 9 6 -2 5 6 2 . M ain St. Bar & G rill, 118 M am St., M o n tp e lie r, 2 2 3 -3 1 8 8 . M anhattan Pizza, 167 M ain St., B urlin gto n, 6 5 8 -6 7 7 6 . M onopoles, 7 P rotection Ave., P lattsburgh, 5 1 8 -5 6 3 -2 2 2 2 . M uddy W aters, 184 M am St., B urlin gto n, 6 5 8 -0 4 6 6 . N ectar's, 188 M ain St., B urlin gto n, 6 5 8 -4 7 7 1 . The N ight Spot O utback, K illin g to n Rd., K illin g to n , 4 2 2 -9 8 8 5 135 Pearl St., B urlin gto n, 8 6 3 -2 3 4 3 . P ickle B arrel, K illin g to n Rd., K illin g to n , 4 2 2 -3 0 3 5 . Radisson Hotel, 6 0 Battery St., B urlin gto n, 6 5 8 -6 5 0 0 . Red Square, 136 Church St., B urlin gto n, 8 5 9 -8 9 0 9 . Rhombus, 186 College St., B urlington, 8 6 5 -3 1 4 4 . Ripton Community Coffee House, Rt. 125, 3 8 8 -9 7 8 2 . Ruben James, 1 59 Mam St., B urlin gto n, 8 6 4 -0 7 4 4 . Rude Dog, 14 Green St., Vergennes, 8 7 7 -2 0 3 4 . Rusty N a il, M ountain Rd., Stowe, 2 5 3 -6 2 4 5 . Sai-Gon Cafe, 133 Bank St., B urlin gto n. 8 6 3 -5 6 3 7 . Sandbar M otor Inn, 5 9 Rt. 2. S. Hero, 3 7 2 -6 9 1 1 . Sha-Booms, 4 5 Lake St., St. Albans, 5 2 4 -9 0 1 4 . Slammer, Rt. 7, M ilto n , 8 9 3 -3 4 5 4 . S om ething Cool, 2 2 B rin kerho ff St., P lattsburgh, NY, 5 1 8 -5 6 3 -8 6 3 9 . Swany's, 2 1 5 M ain St., Vergennes, 8 7 7 -3 6 6 7 . Strand Theater, 2 5 B rin kerho ff St., P lattsburgh, NY. 5 1 8 -5 6 6 -7 1 8 5 . S w eetw aters. 118 Church St., B u rlin gto n, 8 6 4 -9 8 0 0 . The Tavern at the Inn at Essex, Essex Jet., 8 7 8 -1 1 0 0 . Thirsty Turtle. 1 S. Mam St., W aterbury, 2 4 4 -5 2 2 3 . Three M ountain Lodge, Rt. 108, Je ffe rso nville , 6 4 4 -5 7 3 6 . Thrush Tavern, 107 State St., M o n tp e lie r, 2 2 3 -2 0 3 0 . c Toadstool Harry's, Rt. 4 , K illin g to n , 4 2 2 -5 0 1 9 . Trackside Tavern, 18 M a lle tts Bay Ave., W in o o ski, 6 5 5 -9 5 4 2 . Tuckaw ay’s, Sheraton, 8 7 0 W illis to n Rd., S. B u rlin gto n, 8 6 5 -6 6 0 0 . V aliey Players Theater, Rt. 100. W a its fie ld , 4 9 6 -3 4 0 9 . Vermont Pub & B rewery, 144 C ollege, B u rlin gto n, 8 6 5 -0 5 0 0 . V illa Tragara, Rt. 100. W aterbury Ctr.. 2 4 4 -5 2 8 8 . W indjam m er, 1 076 W illis to n Rd , S. B urlin gto n, 8 6 2 -6 5 8 5 .

WEDNESDAY M IC H ELE LA LIB ER T E (French & German cabaret), Leunig’s, 8 p.m. NC. O P EN M IKE (acoustic), Dubie’s Cafe, 8 p.m. N C . K A R A O K E, 135 Pearl, 9:30 p.m. N C. DISCO FU N K (DJs John Demus & Tim Diaz), Ruben James, 11 p.m. N C. GOOD Q U ES TIO N (rock), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. N C. DJ KOSTA (hip-hop), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. N C. V O R C ZA TRIO (jazz/lounge/funk; mem bers o f viperHouse), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. N C. COSM IC LO U N G E (DJ Dread), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m. $1/4. PICKLE-DAVIS (jazz-folk), Manhattan Pizza, 9 p.m. N C. K A R A O K E, J.P.’s Pub, 9 p.m. N C. T O N Y FU R TA D O , DISCO B ISCUITS, N ATIVE (jazzgrass, groove), Higher Ground, 9 p.m. $5/7. KARAO KE N IG H T , Eixtreme Sports Bar & Dance Club, 9 p.m. N C. M ARK BRISSON & FRIENDS (acoustic), Cheers lounge, 9 p.m. N C. B LU E FO X (acoustic blues), Good Times Cafe, 7:30 p.m. Donations. EM ER A LD CITY H O U S E BAND (eclectic jam), 9:30 p.m. $2/5.

THURSDAY BOB GAG NO N TRIO (jazz) Leunig’s, 8 p.m. N C. G R IP P O -H A R V EY Q U A R T ET (jazz), • Halvorson’s, 8 p.m. $2. JIM M CGINNISS & TIM M C K EN ZIE (acoustic), Rhombus, 8 p.m. $3-6. ERIK K O S K IN EN (acoustic jam), Sweetwaters, 8:30 p.m. N C. BARBACOA (surf & turf), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. COLD S T E E L B R E E Z E (blues), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. N C. B ILLY M O S C H ELLA J A Z Z Q U A R T ET ,

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fit for Lamoille Housing Partnership), Rusty Nail, 7 p.m. $8. W ILLIE EDW ARDS (blues), Charlie O s, 9 p.m. N C. CHIN HO! (alt-rock), Emerald City Nightclub, 9 p.m. $3/5. DAN B RUCE J A Z Z T E T (Halloween party), Cafe Ole, Chelsea, 8 p.m. $3.50/N C. NO N COM POS M EN T IS , B LIND SIGHT, DISILLUSIO N (hardcore), Knights o f Columbus Hall, Middlebury, 8:30 p.m. $5. JO H N N Y D EV IL BAND (rock), Rude Dog Tavern, 9 p.m. N C. S AM ’ S P LA N E T (classic rock), Night Spot Outback, 9:20 p.m. N C. V IP ER H 0 U S E (acid jazz), Toadstool Harry’s, 9 p.m. $3.

BIG KIBOSH The New Orleans Klezmer Allstars prove there’s more to the Crescent City than blues and beignets. In fact, you can put this accordion chaos in your challah and smoke it! It’s a multicultural musical manifesto at Higher Ground this Monday, with AfroCuban honchos Bio Rimto.

Manhattan Pizza, 10 p.m. N C. H A N N IB A L (rock), Alley Cats, 9 p.m. NC. LOCOM OTION (DJ Little Martin/ 7 0 s disco), 135 Pearl, 10 p.m. NC. ORBIT, S H EILA D IV IN E, T H E H A LO G ENS (alt-rock), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m. $4. U .N .I. (reggae), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. $3. O PEN M IKE W/D. DAVIS, Cactus Cafe, 9 p.m. N C. S H AO LIN FIG HTING F U N K , Vermont Pub & Brewery, 9:30 p.m. N C. PAU L LEA V IT T BAND (rock), Trackside Tavern, 9 p.m. N C. FROM GOOD H O M ES , JO H N BROW N’S B ODY (pop/g roove, roots/reggae), Higher Ground, 9 p.m. $ 10. KA R A O K E, Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m. NC. M IC H A EL P & M IKE KING (rock), BU Emporium, 7 p.m. N C. M ARK B RISSON & FRIENDS (acoustic), Cheers lounge, 9 p.m. N C. G U Y CO LASACCO (singer-songwriter), Jake’s, 6:30 p.m. N C. O PEN M IK E, Swany’s, 9 p.m. N C. TN T (DJ & karaoke), Thirsty Turtle, 9 p.m. N C. M ARK LEG R A N D (Americana), Thrush Tavern, 7:30 p.m. N C. D EEP B A N A N A B LAC K O U T (funk/groove), Emerald City Nightclub, 9:30 p.m. $5/8. DJ N IG H T (benefit for Norwich Rugby Club), Gallaghers, 8:30 p.m. N C. DHYAN N IR M EG H (folk), Giorgios Cafe, 7 p.m. N C.

weekly

FRIDAY P IC TU R E THIS (jazz), Windjammer, 5 p.m. N C. JO E CAPPS (jazz), Sai-Gon Cafe, 7 p.m. N C. A N N IE G A LLU P (singer-songwriter), Burlington Coffeehouse at Rhombus, 8 p.m. $8. A K A G EO R GE (eclectic mountain music), Borders, 8 p.m. N C. T H E N E V ILLE B R O TH ER S , NOBBY R EED PR O JEC T (New Orleans funk, blues), Flynn Theatre, Burlington, 8 p.m. $36/29. P ER R Y N U N N (acoustic), Ruben James, 5 p.m. N C , followed by DJ N IG H T, 10 p.m. NC. B O O TLES S & U N H O R S ED (Irish), Last Chance Saloon, 7:30 p.m. B L0 0 Z0 T0 M Y (jump blues), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. EV O LU TIO N (DJ Craig Mitchell), 135 Pearl, 10 p.m. $4/5. P ER C Y H IL L, JA IN A S K Y (groove, jazz fusion), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m. $10. U .N .I. (reggae), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. $3. CHAD (pop-rock), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. N C. KIP M EA K ER (blues), Vermont Pub & Brewery, 9:30 p.m. N C. C O M ED Y Z O N E (stand-up), Radisson Hotel, 8 & 10 p.m. $7. A D AM S & E V E (rock), Franny O ’s, 9 p.m. N C.

I isti ngs

DYNAM IC DISCS (line-dancing), Cheers, 9 p.m. NC. E M P T Y POCKETS (rock), Henry’s Pub, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. N C. T H E G RAVELIN B R O S, (acoustic rock; Halloween party), Sunset Ballroom, Holiday Inn, 8 p.m. $10. HIG HLAND W EA VERS (Irish), Tuckaway’s, Sheraton Hotel, 9 p.m. N C. ABAIR BR O S, (rock), Trackside Tavern, 9 p.m. $2. EE E K ! (DJs Frankie Bones, Jahred, Zack Eberz & Cousin Dave; benefit for Make a Wish Foundation), Higher Ground, 10 p.m. $12/15. ED D EV A R N EY & GREGG S EFN ER (acoustic), Ground Round, 8 p.m. NC. DJ NIGHT (Dr. E), Clover House Pub, 9 p.m. NC. EA S T CO AST M U S C LE (blues/rock), Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m. N C. JO HN C A S S EL (jazz piano), The Tavern, Inn at Essex, 8 p.m. N C. LIV E M USIC (rock), Sandbar Motor Inn, 9:30 p.m. N C. LIV E J A Z Z , Diamond Jim’s Grille, 7:30 p.m. N C. Q UADR A (rock), Thirsty Turtle, 9 p.m. N C. TOM C LEA R Y & M IC H ELE LA LIB ER T E (French & German cabaret), Villa Tragara, 6:30 p.m. $7.50. S P A R K Y ’S GANG ( classic rock), Gallagher’s, 9 p.m. $3/4. GOOD Q U ES TIO N (rock), Mad Mountain Tavern, 9 p.m. $4. BIG JO E B U R R ELL & T H E UNK NO W N B LU ES B AN D , LICORICE P IZZ A (bene-

SATURDAY B O O TLESS & U N H O R S ED (Irish), Last Chance Saloon, 7:30 p.m. S TR A N G EF0 LK (groove rock), Flynn Theatre, Burlington, 8 p.m. $17.50. (Sold out.) CHAD (pop-rock), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. N C. ROCKY HORROR PIC TU R E SHOW T E N T P A R TY (DJ Little Martin), 135 Pearl, movie & show, 9 p.m., followed by dancing/costume contest, 10 p.m. $ 8.

DJ N IG H T (hip-hop/r&b DJs), Ruben James, 9 p.m. N C. JA M ES H A R V EY, DAVE G RIPP0 & M A X KING (jazz), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. S U P ER H A LLO W EEN B AS H (DJ Niceness; costumes), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m. $3/5. H A LLO W EEN C O S TU M E P A R TY (DJ Craig Mitchell; prizes), Club Metronome, 8 p.m. $5. K A R A O K E, J.P.’s Pub, 9 p.m. N C . H IP -H O P N IG H T , Ruben James, 11 p.m. N C. S K A B A Z ZA (ska; Halloween party) Vermont Pub & Brewery, 9:30 p.m. N C. SO LO M O NIC S O U N D S Y S T E M (reggae D J), Chicken Bone, 10 p.m. $1. RUSS & CO. (rock), Alley Cats, 9:30 p.m. N C. C O M ED Y Z O N E (stand-up), Radisson

www.sevendaysvt.com

www.

B i g

Hotel, 8 & 10 p.m. $7. G U Y CO LAS AC C O (singer-songwriter), Jake’s, 6:30 p.m. N C. E M P T Y PO C K ETS (rock), Henry’s Pub, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. N C . BOB G ES S ER (jazz guitar), Tuckaway’s, Sheraton Hotel, 9 p.m. N C. JER R Y LA V E N E (acoustic), Ground Round, 8 p.m. N C. AB AIR B R O S, (rock), Trackside Tavern, 9 p.m. $2. JU S A G R 0 0 V E (disco; Halloween party), Higher Ground, 9:30 p.m. $5/8. S EA N D ALY (acoustic), Greatful Bread, noon, Donations. AD A M S AN D E V E (rock), Backstage Pub, 8:30 p.m. N C . E A S T C O AS T M U S C LE (blues/rock), Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m. N C . DJ D A N C E P A R T Y , Extreme Sports Bar & Dance Club, 9 p.m. N C . B ACKR0ADS (country-rock; round & square dancing), Cobbweb, 8:30 p.m. $7/12. F A C ER A K E, M R . W A R D , N U T S P 0 N G E (metal/core), Something Cool, 7:30 p.m. N C . S O U TH C A T H ER IN E S T. JU G B A N D , ORGANIC G RO O V E FAR M ER S (Halloween ball), Strand Theater, 8 p.m. $8. JO H N N Y D EV IL BAND (rock; Halloween party), Rude Dog Tavern, 9 p.m. N C . Q U A D R A (rock; Halloween costume party), Thirsty Turtle, 9 p.m. $5. B L0 0 Z0 T 0 M Y (jump blues), Charlie O ’s, 9 p.m. N C. T H E R E-B O PS (family dance party), Emerald City Nightclub, 3 p.m. $3/10 per family, followed by H O U S E B A N D , C A P ITO L C ITY A L L STARS (Halloween party), 10 p.m. $4/6. B E LIZ B E H A (acid soul/funk; Halloween bash), Rusty Nail, 8:30 p.m. $6/8. (SIC) (alternafunk; Halloween party), Mad Mountain Tavern, 9 p.m. $4. 2 7 DOW N (rock; Halloween party), Gallagher’s, 9 p.m. $3/4. S A M ’S P L A N E T (classic rock), Night Spot Outback, 9:20 p.m. N C . R O C K ETT B A N D , INV IS IB LE JE T (modern rock; Halloween costume party), Toadstool Harry’s, 9 p.m. $3.

con tin u e d on page 25

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O N A N O R S E H O R S E And you thought Lilja was a weird name — John Lilja , that is. The former Burlington bassist, late o f Bloozotom y, Science Fixion and other local units, moved to Norway about a year ago, and finds himself in a band with two guys named Yyvind. The leader is saxophon ist Frode Gjerstad, who, reports Lilja, has worked with “most o f the heavy hitters in European improvised music.” Aside from learning how to pronounce and spell names, though, Lilja has been doing well with CirClllasione Totale Orchestra — so well the seven-piece group has recorded a C D on Cadence Jazz Records. If you want to check out the “crazy, cutting-edge music” Lilja’s gotten himself into, get the disc through orders@cadencebuilding.com, or ask for it at your favorite record store.

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DO GOOD D EP T . Everybody deserves a roof over their heads. That’s why you oughta bring eight dollars and dancin’ shoes to the Rusty Nail in Stowe this Friday. Big Joe Burrell & the Unknown Blues Band, with the incomparable Sandra W right, will belt it out for the Lamoille Housing Partnership. Randolph’s funky doo-woppers, Licorice Pizza, and a raffle for swell prizes fill out the night. Meanwhile, over in Winooski, Lifted spins for the Make a Wish Foundation with a posse o f deejays: New York’s Frankie Bones, Jahred from New Jersey, and homies Za c k Eberz and Cousin Dave. Capacitor Sounds and Nidecker Snowboards put on the party — you bring the cash for the kids. Oh, and Thursday get a kick out o f your night life at a benefit for the Norwich Rugby Club at Gallagher’s in Waitsfield. Score one for the cadets.

N A TIVE THURSDAY. OCTOBER 29 S10 at door

FROM GOOD HOMES JO HN B R O W N ’ S B O D Y FRIDAY. OCTOBER 30 S12 21* S15 18* CAPACITORSOUNDS & NIDECKER SNOWBOAROS PRESENTS THE SEVENTH CHAPTER IN THE LIFTED SERIES

I I PROCEEDS TO BENEFIT MAKE A-WISH FOUNDATION OF VT

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COl'SIN DAVE (FLEX RECORDS, BURLINGTON) SATURDAY. OCTOBER 31 S5 21* $8 18*

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JAZZ IS DEAD EXPLORATIONS INTO THE MUSIC OF THE GRATEFUL DEAD WITH AN ALL STAR BAND FEATURING

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S IN G LE TR A C K S Never mind the hats in Nashville. Mark LeGrand & His Lovesick Band are out to prove there’s twang a-plenty in them thar Green Mountains. Teamed up with bassist Bill BratChard, guitarist Al Lemery (two-thirds o f Starline Rhythm Boys), drummer M ike Cech and pedalsteel man Dave Kellner, Lovesick is corraled at Low Tech this weekend laying tracks on originals and a little Ricky Nelson. LeGrand doesn’t mind boasting: “It’s a hot country band!” Yee-ha . . . Meanwhile, LeGrand and wife Sarah Munro are still collecting frequent flyer miles on airplay for their recent release, Mischievous Angel, in Austin and at home on The Po int . . . The appearance o f Stupid Club’s “Spark” on National Public Radio’s Saturday morning “Car Talk” prompted Jim Lockridge o f Big Heavy World to send in another Burlington band’s automotive fare for considera tion. Lo and behold, Zola Turn’s “Race Car Driver” made the show last week and will be repeated in good speed . . . Speaking o f Big Heavy, the Web site for Burlington’s “urban scene” got an Editors’ Choice designation from the Web portal site Snap for its Burlington Band Guide — which shows “excellence in design, content and editorial presenta tion,” they said. Check it yourself on bigheavyworld.com . . . If you’re near a radio Friday night, lissen in on up-andcomin’ songstress Katherine Quinn live in the studio o f WWPV 88.7 on “Burlington and Beyond,” dedicated to homegrown sounds . . . Singer-songwriters, don’t forget part two o f Advance M usics Acoustic Guitar Summit ’98 Tuesday at Ruben James. Semi-finalists from this gig and an earlier one at Sweetwaters will go to the finals at Nectar’s November 11, where you could win yourself a Gibson Workingman! . . . Speaking o f winning, one Chad Parker o f Burlington came closest (252) to guessing the number o f fish (266) in the Borders window — a promotion for Monday night’s 12 a.m. sale o f the new Phish C D , The Story o f the Ghost. H took home the complete Elektra cata logue o f Phish C D s, a T-shirt and hat. Meanwhile, about 150 fans swarmed the store, to the tunes o f Helicopter Consortium. Down the street, about half that number opted for the Phish sale at Pure Pop. Not bad for midnight.®

C A FE O PEN 7 DAYS A W EEK FR O M 11 A M

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M O E ., TIN CANS AND CAR TIRES (Sony 550 Music, CD ) — Never mind that they’re from Utica, New York; moe. combine a Southern-influenced guitar fervor with lopsided rhythms and choreographed sonic arrangements, all of which elevate them above the masses of jammer wannabes. Tin Cans and Car Tires, the band’s second major-label effort, bottles moe.’s live mojo like a genie, released with CO enthusiasm and heat when played loud. “Stranger Than Fiction” propels the CO 12-song col lection with good-time rock ’n’ roll, but for my money the toe-tapping CO “Nebraska” is moe.’s strongest groove — and that’s not just cuz I’m from there. “Head” offers up one o f those extended, seemingly LU ■ mmm endless jams that I myself am not fond of, but I’ll admit moe. don’t let up on the gas pedal nor veer out o f their LU own lane. “Hi & Lo” shows off the band’s penchant for reggae riddims, while the orchestral violin intro to “Plane CO Crash” reveals a flair for drama. “Letter Home” and the closer, “Queen o f the Rodeo” pay homage to country LU roots. Whatever the feel, guitarists/vocalists Chuck Garvey and Al Schnier, bassist/vocalist Rob Derhak and drummer Vinnie Amico know how to rev it. Last year moe. were elected by Rolling Stone one o f America’s 10 best under ground acts, but Tin Cans suggests the boys will drive well CO above ground henceforth. Moe. take it to Higher Ground with funksters Moon Boot Lover this Tuesday. — Pamela Polston

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SEVEN KAYS

octbDer 28,1998

M IX M A S T ER M IK E , ANTI-THEFT DEV (A sph C D ) — San Francisco’s Mix Master Mike doesn’t credit any music samples on his debut solo disc, Anti-Theft Device — he doesn’t need to. His sound sources are pretty much unrecognizable. While pop hip-hoppers like Puff Daddy now routinely rap over what amounts to a cover o f some previous hit, Mike makes something new out o f pre-exist ing records. A pro deejay since age 15, Mike (and some time partner D J QBert) won the pres tigious international D M C deejay battle in ’92 and ’93, dominating so thor oughly that contest organizers requested they “put away their swords” to give other deejays a chance. It’s no wonder The Beastie Boys signed him on for their recent Hello Nasty record and tour. Anti-Theft Device evolved out o f tapes Mike made to practice scratching over. It took six months o f layering and editing to complete this lexicon o f hip-hop beats and scratches. The lack o f rhymes on the disc makes the songs sort of blend together, but Mike keeps things interesting by producing pretty much every sound you’ve ever heard by vinyl manipulation, and some you haven’t. From “Unidentified’s” “The Message”-like beat to the Terminator X-style squeals on “Well Wicked,” he quotes like a jazzer without actually sampling. The samples he does use are mostly snippets o f obscure sci-fi movie soundtracks and raps. Mike is also a founding member o f Invisibl Skratch Piklz, a “Turntable Orchestra,” clearly dedicated and quali fied to bring further legitimacy to his “instrument.” Live, Mike is a two-turntable-and-microphone purist who insists on producing special effects with his hands, not a box. For many turntable artists the wheels o f steel become simply wheels o f steal. With Anti-Theft Device Mix Master Mike proves he has a lock on innovation, and no fear o f leaving his prints all over the scene o f the crime. The Master turns on Toast this Sunday, with Brooklyn’s street-hoppers M.O.P. (Mash Out Posse) up first. — Paul Gibson

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SUNDAY ARS M U S IC , Leunig’s, 1 0:30 a.m. N C. A N IM A (medieval polyphony), Borders, 4 p.m. N C. J0M 0F0 (fiink/r&b), Nectars, 9:30 p.m. N C. M O X Y FRU VO U S (alt-rock), Club Metronome, 7 p.m. $8. M IX M A S TER M IK E, M .O .P . (DJs), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m. $12. RUSS & CO. (rock), Chicken Bone, 10 p.m. N C. K A R A O K E, Edgewater Pub, 4 p.m. N C. KATE B AR C LAY (singer -song writer), La Brioche, 11 a.m. N C. LIV E M USIC (acoustic), Main Street Bar & Grill, 11 a.m. N C.

MONDAY A L L E Y CATS JAM W /NERBAK B RO S, (rock), Alley Cats, 9 p.m. N C. PIN E S T R E ET J A Z Z S E X T E T , Manhattan Pizza, 9 p.m. N C. T H E B LA M E (rock), Nectars, 9:30 p.m. NC. O R A N G E FACTO R Y (acid soul), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. N C. M ETR O SW ING (dance lessons), Club Metronome, from 7 p.m., $8, followed by dance party. R EG ATTA 6 9 , M OBTOW N T E L E G R A P H , S KAM APH R O D ITES (ska), Club Toast, 8 p.m. $5. BIO R IM TO , N EW O R LEA N S K L E ZM E R A L L STARS (AfroCuban, ldezmer-jazz), Higher Ground, 9:30 p.m. $6. LIT T LE A X E (acoustic), Horn of the Moon, 8 p.m. N C.

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3 TUESDAY O PEN S TAG E (acoustic), Burlington Coffeehouse at Rhombus, 8 p.m. $3-6. PAT A U S TIN (jazz), Leunig’s, 8 p.m. N C. C H ER R Y P O P P IN ’ D AD D IES , T H E P IET A S T ER S , O ZO M ATLI (swing, ska, Colombian rock), Patrick Gym, UVM, 7:30 p.m. $13/17. SW ING D A N C E LE S S O N S , Club Metronome, from 7 p.m., $8, fol lowed by M ARTIN & M IT C H E LL (DJs), 10 p.m. N C. S TA R LIN E R H Y TH M BOYS (hill billy boogie) Red Square, 9:30 p.m. N C. ABAIR B R O S, (rock), Nectars, 9:30 p.m. N C. ACO USTIC G UITAR S U M M IT (Advance Music singer-songwriter contest), Ruben James, 8 p.m. N C , followed by B A S H M E N T (reggae/dancehall D J), 11 p.m. N C. FLA S H B A C K (7 0 s-’90s DJ), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m. N C/$5. RUSS & CO. (rock), J.P.’s Pub, 9:30 p.m. N C. O P EN M IK E W/FRANKTrackside Tavern, 9 p.m. N C. M O E ., M OON B OOT LO V ER (groove/funk), Higher Ground, 9 p.m. $12/14.

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SEVEN M S

page.gS

WOODY JACKSON'S Annual Fall Clearance Sale OPENING N e v ille B rothers

S a tu r d a y N o v em b er 7th 10AM-4PM

To Benefit the Bridge School at the new Holy Cow Store 44 Main Street, Middlebury Paintings, Prints, Posters, Switchcovers, Cards, Shirts And Many M oovleous Things For Info call 388-6737

yvMTHEATRE^

with Vermont Singe Company Guest Artists

dangerous beauty:

When mountaineer Kurt Diemberger started bagging 8,000-meter peaks, Eisenhower was in office and Gortex still the stuff o f science fic tion. But while the climbing world put M t. Everest on the pinnacle pedestal, Diemberger held a candle for the even more dangerous, even more remote K2. He finally reached the summit in 1986 but lost his climbing partner on the way down. The climber-author-filmmaker gives a slide-lecture on high stakes at high altitudes. Thursday, October 29. Cam pus Center Theater, Billings Student Center, UVM , Burlington 7 p.m . $8. Info, 800-282-3963.

born on a bayou:

Its a family affair with the Neville Brothers — their God* given harmonies are, well, genetic. In the footsteps o f their Mardi Gras Indian uncle, George “Big Chief Jolly” Landry, the brothers Aaron, Cyril, Art and Charles evoke the eclectic styles o f a wild, magical city — from pop balladry to Caribbean and Native American flavorings to jazz and full-on funk. The “Ambassadors o f New Orleans music” hit town to stir things up, with local bluesman Nobby Reed providing prelimi nary heat. Friday, O ctober30. Flynn Theatre, Burlington, 8 p.m . $26-39. Info, 863-5966.

The hilarious hit comedy by the author o f

S Y L V IA and

animal attraction: The devil dogs are real and the snack food not so sweet

LOVE LETTER S.

D in in g

November II - 14, 19-21 at 7:30 p.m.; November 22 at 2 p.m.

656-2094 by A .R . G u rn ey VERMONT PUBLIC TELEVISION

Vermont Business Graphics

Fri. & Sat. Eves. - $11.50 (no discounts): Other perfs - $10. $2 discount seniors/students

Royal 1Tyler Theatre

at a special Halloween bash for pets which organizers promise will be a “pawsitively fur-raising time.” Costumed critters mix and mingle while pet owners take advantage o f discounted wares to benefit the Humane Society o f Chittenden County. What’s a pet to wear to such a furry fete? Says party-thrower Alison Emerson, “Tutus are always a good one.” Saturday, October 31. Bone Appetit, Church Street M arketplace, Burlington, 10 am . - 9 p.m . Free. Info, 651-9300.

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S O N G - night Traditional anthems and chants, dance music and protest songs of South Africa, Malawi and Zimbabwe with special guests Kasiya Phiri guitar, vocals Marcus Copening drums Rafael Flores guitar Ron Sm ith saxophone Eric Richardson bass and guest dancers

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Barbary Coast Jazz Ensemble with special guests

D o n G la s g o , director

Arturo O 'Fa rrill piano/conductor

Jim Seeley trumpet

TwButetO Chico oTaR Ail

7:30 p.m. $15. Info, 656-3085. VAUGHAN RECITAL SERIES: British cellist Anton Lukoszevieze performs con temporary works at the Faulkner Recital Hall, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N .H ., 4 p.m. Free. Info,

A living legend in AfroCuban big band jazz S A T U R D A Y , N O V E M B E R 7 • 8 P M • S P A U L D IN G A U D IT O R IU M

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p a g e ^ B ,*.

music PIANO A N D PERCU SSIO N RECITAL: Pianist Michael Arnowitt joins Canadas premier percussionist Beverley Johnston for a performance o f old and new orches tral m usic UVM Recital Hall, Burlington,

An dy G o n za le z bass

TICKETS & INFORMATION

Seven Days recommends you confirm all calendar events, as times and dates may change after the paper is printed.

through Maurice Sendak’s award-winning

artists in a weekly drawing session at the <

kids’ tale about a rascal in pajamas who meets his match. Flynn Theatre, Burling ton, 7:30 p.m. $16-26. Info, 863-5966.

Firehouse Gallery, Burlington, 6:30-9:30

drama ‘DIARY O F A SCO U N D REL’: Northern

p.m. $3-6. Info, 865-7165,

words JO E CITR O : Vermont’s “ Bard o f the Bizarre” reads from Shadow Child, his lat

Stage satirizes politics and class struggle in Alexander Ostrovsky’s comical tale o f a young man in 19th-century Russia. Briggs Opera House, White River Junction, 8 p.m. $20. Info, 291-9009.

est Green Mountain gothic thriller. South Burlington Community Library. Info, 652-7080. HOWARD GA RDN ER: The author of Frames o f M ind: The Theory o f Multiple Intelligence makes the connection between

film

education and neurology in the Gymnasium, Castleton State College, 7

‘B U T C H E R BOY’: An Irish lad who’s “part Huckleberry Finn, part Hannibal Letter” offers a terrifying yet comic per spective on his troubled home. Loew Auditorium, Hood Museum o f Art,

p.m. Free. Info, 468-1239. QU EER PO ETS: Emerging and estab lished poets bring their work out o f the closet and into the Rhombus Gallery, 186 College St., Burlington, 8 p.m. $3-6. Info.

603-646-2422.

Dartmouth College, Hanover, N .H ., 6:45 & 9:15 p.m. $6. Info, 603-646-2422.

dance

art

865-9603. JU LIA ALVAREZ: The acclaimed au th or o f How the Garcia Girls Lost Their Accents

‘W H ERE T H E W ILD T H IN G S ARE’: The American Repertory Ballet dances

FIG U R E DRAWING: The human figure motivates aspiring and accomplished

reads original poems and selections from her first published work o f nonfiction,

.h J i

MAKING THE HOUSE OF THE WORLD Finding home through the indigenous nature o f the human soul A Workshop with

M artin P rechtel, Mayan Shaman Author of

Secrets of the Talking Jaguar “To ‘go home’ we don’t literally have to return to where our ancestors came from, we ‘go home’ by m aking home, by fin d in g home through the indigenousity of the human soul. Together we will build a many-storied ‘house’, a house in which our own ancestory is the spiritual DNA, the root and foundation out of which to grow our new existence.” - Martin Prechtel

• November 13 (evening); 14-15 (10am - 6 pm) • $150 • Middiebury, Vermont (site TBA) For inform ation contact: Honey In The H eart 714 Q uaker Street • B ristol, VT 05443 • 802-453-5072

fire on the m ountain: According to pre-Colombian myths, the eagle ruled the skies, and the serpent controlled the underworld. The deer, victimized by childrens arrows, was Mother Earths lover. Were these myths and war symbols prophesizing pre sent-day conflicts? Dragon Dance Theatre explores the possibility in a moonlit Halloween production that combines dance, music, fire sculptures and eerie, classical Mexican skeleton puppets. Saturday.; October 31. Foot o f H unger M ountain, M iddlesex, 6 p.m . $5. Info, 2 2 3 -5 1 2 4

poe pourri ■

I f dramatic readings from macabre master Edgar Allan Poe don’t

scare you, auction items at the Lost Nation Theater Halloween fundraiser might. With Catherine Orr playing “brood” keyboard music in the background, revelers indulge in decadent delicacies and bid on items that could have been plucked from the pages o f a horror tale. Like a gift certificate for income tax preparation. Yikes! Saturday, October 31. U nitarian Church, M ontpelier, 8 p.m . $20. Info, 2 2 9 -0 4 9 2 .

the why files:

His work may not be ready for prime time, but Ray Hyman rivals The X -F iles for explaining paranormal phenomena. The University o f Oregon psychology professor and consultant to the U .S. government psychic spying program has made a career o f studying deception and how people come to believe in things that don’t exist. He lectures on why fact sometimes only seem s stranger than fiction.

The author will give a reading from Secrets o f th e T a lk in g J a g u a r Wednesday, November 11, 7:00 PM at the Book Rack and Children’s Pages, Champlain Mill, 1 Main Street, Winooski, 655-0231

BOOK

^C K

*Martin Prechtel gallops through the fields o f human possibility with flowers dripping out of his mouthJ - Robert Bly

n Center

Shambhal SH A M BH A LA TR A IN IN G

T h e A r t o f B e in g H u Introductory Talk — Open to All ^

Friday, Novem ber 6th 7:30 pm — Free Weekend Program consists of talks,

Sunday, N ovem ber 1. M cC arthy A rts Center, St. M ich ael's College, Colchester, 7 :3 0 p .m . Free. Info, 6 5 4 -2 5 3 5 .

Cost for "The discovery of magic can happen only when we transcend our embarrassment about being alive, when we have the bravery to proclaim the goodness and dignity of human life, without either hesitation or arrogance." -Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche, Author of Shambhala: Sacred Path of die Warrior

Something to Declare. Book Rack:,

G RO U PS: Women Helping Battered

and little scaredy cats. Shelburne Museum,

For more information, call 899-4878

Champlain Mill, Winooski, 7 p.m. Free.

Women facilitates a support group for

6-10 p.m. $6.50. Info, 651-6707. H A U N TED FO REST: Enjoy a dramatic

Shambhala Meditation Center

* Info, 655-0231.

kids

abused people in Burlington, 6:30-8 p.m. Free. Info, 658-1996.

PARENTS A N O N YM O US: Parents gath

C O M M U N IT Y M ED ICAL SC H O O L : Learn about new drug therapies for heart

er for support and assistance around the

attacks at this weekly medical info session.

challenges o f childrearing. Babysitting goes with the program at the King Street Youth Center, Burlington, 6-8 p.m. Free. Info, 800-639-4014. SONG A N D STORYTIM E: Babies and toddlers benefit from a singing read-along. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216. STORIES: Little listeners hear stories, snack and make crafts at the Childrens Pages, Winooski, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 655-1537. STORYTIME: Four- and five-year-olds enjoy stories, songs, fingerplays and crafts. South Burlington Community Library, 11 a m. Free. Register, 652-7080. TINY T O T S: Kids three and under hear age-appropriate tales at Barnes Sc Noble, S. Burlington, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 864-8001.

etc COM PUTER T E C H EXPO: Worried about Y2K? Plug in to the latest millenni um developments at a high-tech tradeshow hosted by Computer User. Radisson Hotel, Burlington, 9 a.m. - 5 p.m. Free. Register, 863-0040. b a t t e r e d w o m e n 's s u p p o r t . . w

Hall A, Given Building, UVM, Burlington,.

Halloween at this outdoor theatrical fundraiser featuring stories, plays and other frightening fine. Green Mountain Audubon Society Nature Center,

‘W HAT D O W O M EN ’S BO D IES WANT?’ German prof Vanessa Van Ornam revisits an early epoch in European

Assembly, Fletcher Allen Health Care,

feminism through the eyes o f 19th-century

Burlington, 7-8 p.m. $20. Info, 865-2278. W O M EN ’S ST U D IE S LEC T U RE SERIES: Conflict mediator Ellen Bernstein answers questions about divorce mediation. UVM Womens Center, 34 South W iliam s St., Burlington, noon.

German novelist Fanny Lcwald. Starr Library, Middiebury College, 4:30 p.m. Free. Info, 443-5502. T A K IN G BACK O U R LIVES’: Disabled victims o f violence and abuse share stories with other survivors at this day-long

Free. Info, 656-7892. D ISABILITIES PANEL: Disabled people and other experts share insights on “Helping Without Patronizing.” Martin Luther King Lounge, Billings Student Center, UVM , Burlington, 5-6:30 p.m.

speakout. Vermont Center for Independent Living, Montpelier, 10 a.m. 3 p.m. Free. Info, 229-5939. ‘T H E PRO SPECTS FO R AUDACIOUS D EM O CRACY’: In this lecture, historian and part-time auctioneer Richard

Free. Info, 656-2060. ‘A PROFILE O F D ISABILITY IN VER

Hathaway looks “beyond the politics of spectacle” to a new definition o f citizen ship. Alumni Hall, Vermont College,

a regional office in Chittenden County. Burlington City Hall Auditorium, 11 a.m. Free. Info, 879-2706. H A UN TED BARN: Dracula’s coffin, the “Hall o f Shadows and Shapes” and four other yignettes.oflfer outsi?ed scarpsfprbig

www.shambhala.org/centers/burlington email: nirsam@together.net

Huntington, 7, 8, 9 & 10 p.m. $9.50. Info, 863-5966.

6-8 p.m. Free. Info, 656-2882. C P R W O RKSH O P: Would you know how to jump-start a human heart? Get the cardio pulmonary basics in Burgess

M O N T ’: The Montpelier-based Vermont Center for Independent Living holds a press conference to discuss efforts to open

187 South Winooski Ave. Burlington, Vermont 05401

Burlington’s Hottest Halloween Party TH E

19 2 0 s Saturday, October 31, y p.m. Who will you be? Co-sponsored by

Montpelier, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 223-7715. ‘WALL-TO-WALL MALLS?’: Sprawl foes

MAGIC

discuss Act 250 and prepare for battle over a Wal-Mart proposed for Berlin. Vermont Center for Independent Living, Montpelier, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 229-0800. ‘W E ST BY SO U T H W E ST ’: The myths and realities o f the American frontier get

Swing Band •N o Cover • 864-9800 • Church Street Marketplace

October 28,1998

SEVEN HAYS •

page 27

Info, 229-0774. PH ILIP BARUTH: The novelist reads from his Burlington-based book Dream o f the White Village. Morgan Room, Aiken Hall, Champlain College, Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info,

school learn about this job-training program at an open meeting. Taft School, Burlington, 4-5 p.m. Free. Info, 658-1186. BROWN BAG LEC T U RE SERIES: This historical talk with lung specialist William Graham recounts a ground breaking Vermont study that led to worldwide standards for safe dust expo sure. Hall A, Given Building, UVM, Burlington, noon. Free. Info, 656-2540. TH EA TER SPACE SPEAKOUT: Add

drama

658-0800. LAZY W RITERS FORUM : Share your writing in progress in a supportive workshop environment. KelloggHubbard Library, Montpelier, 6 p.m. Free. Info, 223-3338. GREG DELANTY: The poet-prof reads from The Hellbox — his new book of poems inspired by growing up in a family o f printers. See “to do” list, this issue. McCarthy Arts Center, St. Michael’s College, Colchester, 7:30

DIARY O F A SC O U N D R EL’: See

p.m. Donations. Info, 654-2535.

discussed along with The Way West, by A.B. Guthrie. Cabot Public Library, 7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 563-2721.

thursday music ‘T H E MARRIAGE O F FIGARO’: The National Opera Company takes on Mozarts comic masterpiece o f decep tion and intrigue. Rutland Intermediate School Theatre, 7:30 p.m. $18. Info, 775-5413.

October 28. A HARD H EA RT’: Theater students stage Howard Barker’s challenging, fan tastic drama in which a cultured char acter attempts to stem a city’s lapse into barbarity. Center for the Arts, Middlebury College, 8 p.m. $4. Info, 443-6433. T H E H O U SE O N M ANGO ST R E E T ’: Dartmouth students stage an adaptation o f Sandra Cisneros’ coming-of-age tale o f a young Latina grow ing up poor but proud. Warner Bentley Theater, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N .H ., 8 p.m. $1. Info, 603-646-2422.

film

kids PARENTS AN O N YM O US: See October 28. STO RYTIM E & CRAFTS: Cultural activities keep your children occupied at the Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 10-10:45 a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216. ‘N EW T IT L E S’ STORY TIM E: Kids four and up learn about world hunger as they read along with Woody Guthries This Land Is Your Land. Barnes & Noble, S. Burlington, 3 p.m. Free. Info, 864-8001. STORY HO UR: Young readers learn from lighthearted literature in a coun try setting. Flying Pig Childrens Books, Ferry Rd., Charlotte, 10:30 a.m. Free.

‘CA LLIN G T H E G H O ST S’: This documentary chronicles the efforts of two women in war-torn BosniaHerzegovina to make rape a war crime. Debra Rawson Memorial Library, Underhill, 6-8 p.m. Free. Info, 864-0555. W A N T H E TER R IBLE, PART II’:

Info, 425-2600.

sport KU RT D IEM BERGER: After an after noon stop at Adventurous Traveler Bookstore, the world-class mountaineer presents a slide show covering more than four decades of peak experiences.

In the continuation o f this operatic tale by Sergei Eisenstein, the 16th-century czar is restored to power, only to be threatened again by assassination plots.

See ‘to do’ list, this issue. Campus Center Theater, Billings Student Center, UVM, Burlington, 7 p.m. $8.

Loew Auditorium, Hood Museum of Art, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N .H ., 7 p.m. $6. Info, 603-646-2422.

etc

Info, 800-282-3963.

words

H A UN TED BARN: See October 28. H AUNTED FOREST: See October 28. Y O U T H BU ILD M EETIN G : Young

JO E CITR O : See October 29, Bear

adults not currently attending high

type aye p erson ality

your voice to the chorus calling for affordable rehearsal and performance space in Burlington. Burlington City Hall Auditorium, 7 p.m. Free. Reservations, Info, 865-7166. M EET T H E CANDIDATES: State legislative candidates from Colchester participate in an issue-oriented dialogue at the Hampton Inn, Colchester, 7:30

a-,

a.m. Free. Reservations, 655-1418. INMATES FORUM : Citizens United for Rehabilitation of Errants holds an

»> 1

open discussion of inmate issues in Vermont. Old Dorm Room, Vermont Technical College, Randolph, 6:30

'('!■ * 1 1

p.m. Free. Info, 885-3387. LAND T R U ST S AND T H E LAND SCAPE: Darby Bradley o f the Vermont Land Trust discusses the effect organi zations like his have on the state’s working landscape. 104 Aiken Center, UVM, Burlington, 12:30-1:45 p.m. Free. Info, 223-5234.

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friday music ‘T H E MARRIAGE OF FIGARO’: See October 29, Barre Opera House, 8 p.m. $10-20. Info, 476-8188. T H E NEVILLE BROTHERS: The New Orleans stalwarts — Aaron, Art, Charles and Cyril — play a funky, syn copated, soul-stirring tribute to Cajun culture. The Swanton-based Nobby Reed Project opens the show. See “to do” list, this issue. Flynn Theatre, Burlington, 8 p.m. $26-39. Info, 863-5966.

Pond Books, Montpelier, 7 p.m. Free.

■

Irish-born poet Greg Delanty’s forebears knew famine, so its fitting that his work benefit the hungry. The St. Michael’s College prof turns hot type into hot meals when he reads from The Hellbox, his new collection of poems inspired by the printing trade in which he grew up. The event is part of the Writer’s National Harvest — a “readin” involving some 2,000 writers at 600 locations to sup port food-relief programs around the country. Thursday, October 29. McCarthy Arts Center, St. Michael's College, Colchester, 7 :3 0 p.m. Donations. Info, 654-2535.

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V ER M O N T CO N TEM PO RARY M U SIC EN SEM BLE: Works by Vermont composers Don Stewart, Thomas Read and Dennis BathoryKitsz get a fair hearing at this new music concert. UVM Recital Hall, Burlington, 8 p.m. $12. Info, 849-6900. BIG JO E BURRELL: The sax man and his Unknown Blues Band, with Sandra Wright, lay it down to benefit the nonprofit Lamoille Housing Partner ship. Licorice Pizza also perform at the Rusty Nail, Stowe, 7 p.m. - 1 a.m. $8. Info, 888-5714.

drama DIARY O F A SC O U N D R EL’: See October 28. ‘A HARD H EA RT’: See October 29, 2 & 8 p.m. ‘T H E H O U SE O N M ANGO ST R E E T ’: See October 29. ‘GO D SPELL’: The gospel according to Matthew comes to musical life when the Essex Community Players stage this Bible-based rock opera. Memorial Hall, Essex Junction, 8 p.m. $10. Info, 863-5966. ‘IN SU R R E C T IO N M A SS’: This non religious service includes radical texts spoken and sung, cantastorias and “funeral marches for rotten ideas.” Bread 6c Puppet Theater, Glover, 8 p.m. Donations. Info, 525-3031.

film ‘T H E R E ’S SO M E T H IN G A B O U T MARY’: The creators o f Dumb and Dumber reach new heights in lowbrow filmmaking with this romantic tale of adolescent love. Spaulding Auditorium, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N .H ., 9 p.m. $5. Info, 603646-2422.

words ‘FATHERS A N D FAMILIES’: Fresh perspectives on fatherhood come up in a discussion o f The Shipping News, by Annie Proulx. Agency o f Human Services, 103 South Main St., Waterbury, noon - 1:30 p.m. Free. Info, 241-2244.

APPLE SALE: Look for forbidden fruit

kids

in all its forms at this annual harvest offering. Horticulture Research Center, Green Mountain Dr., S. Burlington, 10 a.m. - 4 p.m. Free. Info, 658-9166. O PEN OBSERVATORY: Get a good look at the autumn sky with observant

SO N G A N D STORYTIM E: The under-three crowd drops in for tunes and tales. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 10:15 a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216. ‘PAJAMARAMA’: Parents and kids read together before “Halloween havoc” ensues, with treats and tricks all around at this pro-pajama event. Barnes & Noble, S. Burlington, 7-8:30 p.m. Free. Info, 864*8001. ‘M U SIC W IT H ROBERT RESN IK’: Kids sing songs with the musical host o f Vermont Public Radio’s folk show “All the Traditions.” Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 11 a.m. Free. Register, 865-7216. STORY H O U R: Toddlers listen to sto ries at the Milton Public Library, 10:30 a.m. Free. Ihfo, 893-4644.

sport

drama ‘GO DSPELL’: See October 30, 2 & 8

Info, 865-7216.

Society. Hinesburg, 8:30-10 p.m. Free. Info and directions, 985-3269. G L B T Q SU PPO RT GROUP: Gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered and questioning youth make new friends and get support. Outright Vermont, Burlington, 6:30-9 p.m. Free. Info, 800-452-2428. BATTERED W O M EN ’S SU PPO RT GROUP: Women Helping Battered

p.m. ‘A HARD HEART’: See October 29. DIARY O F A SC O U N D R EL’: See

‘RUGRATS’: The animated rascals come to life on stage for a rainy-day musical adventure. Memorial Auditorium, Burlington, 11 a.m. & 3

film

DANCE: The Onion River Jazz Band plays for bone-ratders o f all ages at this alcohol-free, family fright-night to benefit the Vergennes Opera House, 8 p.m. $10. Info, 877-6737. BALLROOM DANCE: You’ll be much more mysterious after a merengue lesson at a Halloween dance

things off with a discussion of the rela tionship between “Racism, Civil Rights

open to singles and couples. C B ’s, Susie Wilson Rd., Essex Junction, 8 p.m.

and Feminism.” Ira Allen Chapel,

$12. Info, 862-2207.

UVM, Burlington, 7:30 p.m. Free.

CO N T R A DANCE: Lisa Greenleaf

Info, 656-7892. ‘T H E BEAR N E C E SSIT IE S’: Nancy

calls for Pete and Karen Sutherland and Colin McCaffrey at this northern-style

Bell tracks black bears from a safe dis tance in a slide lecture that puts the focus on natural habitat. Ferrisburgh Central School, 7-9:30 p.m. $3. Info,

community hoedown. A 4:30 p.m. les son and poduck costs $5. Capitol City Grange Hall, Montpelier, 8 p.m. $6. Info, 426-3734. HALLOW EEN DANCE: Mango Jam, the Skamaphrodites and the Hi-Fi Bugs kick it out for costumed revelers at this riotous rug-cutting event. Montpelier City Hall, 8:30 p.m. $7.50. Info, 229-2337. ‘D AN CE FOR T H E DARK W O RLD ’: Dragon Dance Theatre uses

College, 4 p.m. Free. Info, 443-5074.

Charlotte Children’s Center, Ferry Rd.,

■•-V

2-4 p.m. $3. Info, 425-3328. ‘T R IC K O R TREA TIN G & READ IN G ’: Take your pick o f four Halloween stops for storytelling, mask making and other activities. Isley Library, Vermont Book Shop, Otter

‘ROCKY H O RRO R PIC T U R E SHOW”: Up for transsexual escapades

Info, 862-9622.

American Cooperation, Then and Now.” Geonomics Center, Middlebury

p.m. $20-25. Info, 863-5966. HALLOW EEN CARNIVAL: A not-sohaunted forest, an obstacle course and plenty o f pumpkin-themed activities warm kids up for the night ahead.

College St., Burlington, 8 p.m. $5-10.

dance

434-4113. ‘SPAIN A N D T H E AM ERICAS’: Amherst College prof Javier Corrales considers a century of Spanish influ ence with a lecture entitled “Inter-

October 28. ‘T H E H O U SE O N M ANGO ST R E E T ’: See October 29, 2 p.m. ‘T H E LEG EN D O F SLEEPY H O L LOW’ : Fool’s Jacket Troupe stages an “elaborately macabre” adaptation o f Washington Irving’s tale o f headless horsemanship. Rhombus Gallery, 186 Info, 865-9603.

DIXIELAND HALLOWEEN

28. W O M EN ’S C E N T E R C O N FER EN CE: Former Black Panther “secre tary” Kathleen Neal Cleaver kicks

Middlesex, 6 p.m. $5. Info, 223-5124.

658-1996.

Saturday

etc

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kids

members o f the Vermont Astronomical

D IABETES EXERCISE CLASS: People with diabetes benefit from week ly low-impact and aqua aerobics. YMCA, Burlington, 9-10:45 a.m. Free.

H A UN TED BARN: See October 28. H A U N TED FOREST: See October

$20. Info, 229-0492.

myths and symbols. See “to do” list, this issue. Foot o f Hunger Mountain,

STO RY T IM E : Kids three and up lis ten to literature read aloud. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 11 a.m. Free.

Women facilitates a group in Burlington, 9:30-11 a.m. Free. Info,

Unitarian Church, Montpelier, 8 p.m.

fire, skeleton puppets and drumming in a pageant exploring pre-Columbian

Creek Used Books and the Swift House, Middlebury, 1-5 p.m. Free.

on a stormy night? This cult classic stars Susan Sarandon and Meat Loaf. 135 Pearl St., Burlington, 9 p.m. $8.

Info, 443-7277.

sport

Info, 863-2343. ‘FAST, CHEAP & O U T O F C O N TRO L’: Director Errol Morris intercuts

M E N ’S T E N N IS: A and B division tennis players serve up doubles action at the Oak Leaf tourney. Twin Oaks Sports & Fitness, Kennedy Dr., S. Burlington, 1-4 p.m. Info, 658-0001. LO N G TR A IL W O RK HIKE: Help clean water bars from Smuggler’s Notch

documentary interviews to explore the metaphysical meeting points o f the ani mal, the mechanical and the human. Dana Auditorium, Middlebury College, 3 & 8 p.m. Free. Info, 443-6433. ‘T H E T H IE F’: This soul-searching

to Chilcoot Pass in an effort to ready

film by Pavel Chukhrai concerns a post-war encounter in a ruined Russian

the trail for spring. Meet at Montpelier High School, 9 a.m. Free. Info,

city. Loew Auditorium, Hood Museum o f Art, Dartmouth College, Hanover,

223-1406. LITERACY FU N RUN : Runners for

N .H ., 7 & 9:15 p.m. $6. Info, 603646-2422.

reading spread the word in a three-mile race to mark National Literacy Action Week. Twilight Park, Middlebury,

words

10:30 a.m. $6. Info, 443-7277.

JO E C ITR O : See October 28. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 2 p.m. Free.

etc

Info, 863-3403.. EDGAR ALLAN PO E HAL

H A U N TED BARN: See October 28. H A U N TED FO REST: See October

LOW EEN: Lost Nation Theater pon ders curious volumes of'forgotten lore at this “frightfully fun fundraiser” fea turing “brood” music by Catherine Orr

28, 1-2:30 p.m. ‘SPAIN A N D T H E AM ERICAS’: See October 30, 10 a.m. & 4 p.m. W O M E N ’S C E N T E R C O N FER

and an auction o f items creepy and crafty. See “to do” list, this issue.

EN C E: A day o f lectures and work-

continued on next page

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shops considers how “women changing communities” challenge the status quo. Waterman Building, UVM , Burlington, 10 a.m. - 3 p.m. Free. Info, 656-7892. H EIRLO O M APPRAISAL: Twelve appraisers tell you what it’s worth — jewelry, furniture or any old thing — and the Fleming Museum benefits in the bargain. Fleming Museum, UVM , Burlington, 10 a.m. - 3 p.m. $6.50 per item. Info, 656-0750. ANIM AL HALLOW EEN: Pets in cos tume trade tricks for treats at this “fur raising” bash to benefit the Humane Society o f Chittenden County. See “to do” list, this issue. Bone Appetit, Church Street Marketplace, Burlington, 10 am. - 9 p.m. Free. Info, 651-9300. ‘HALLOW EEN W ITH H O R SES’: Trick or treating, face painting and a lot o f horsing around make this Halloween gathering a bale o f fun. UVM Horse Barn, S. Burlington, 5-7 p.m. Free. Info, 863-0205. HARVEST FESTIVAL: Carve out some time for pumpkins, hayrides and music to celebrate the bounty o f the season. Depot Park, Rutland, 9 a.m. - 3 p.m. Free. Info, 464-3672. FARMERS M ARKETS: Look for Vermont-grown agricultural products and crafts on the green at Burlington City Hall Park, 8:30 a.m. - 2:30 p.m. Info, 453-2435. Or in Montpelier, Corner o f Elm and State Streets, 9 a.m. - 1 p.m. Info, 426-3800.

Auditorium, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N .H ., 6:45 p.m. $6. Info, 603-646-2422. ‘M ID N IG H T COW BOY’: Jon Voigt

1 Sunday music ‘T H E MARRIAGE O F FIGARO’: See October 29, Alumni Auditorium, Lyndon Institute, Lyndonville, 3 p.m. $17.50. Info, 748-2600. V ER M O N T W IN D ENSEM BLE: Prof and percussionist D. Thomas Toner conducts a program of American standards by Gershwin, Aaron Copland, Charles Ives and others. Vergennes Opera House, 4 p.m. Donations. Info, 877-6737. VAUGHAN RECITAL SERIES: Listen for African-American spirituals and Broadway show tunes in an eclectic vocal program at Faulkner Recital Hall, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N .H ., 4 p.m. Free. Info, 603646-2422. FID D LE CO N CERT: Sawyers con vene for a monthly concert hosted by the Northeast Fiddlers Association. Montpelier VFW Hall, 1-5:30 p.m. Donations. Info, 244-8537.

drama ‘GO DSPELL’: See October 30, 7 p.m. DIARY OF A SCO U N D REL’: See October 28, 5 p.m.

film ‘D ARLIN G’: Julie Christie plays a young, amoral model who holds bore dom at bay by drifting from one affair to another— part one of a double fea ture with M idnight Cowboy. Spaulding

and Dustin Hoffman team up in this edgy tale from the dark side o f city life — part two of a double feature with Darling. Spaulding Auditorium, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N .H ., 9:10 p.m. $6. Info, 603-646-2422.

House, a “home away from home” for families o f children in area hospitals. Elks Lodge, Burlington, 9:30 a.m. Free. Info, 862-4943. ‘PSYCHICS A N D SC IE N T IST S’: A psychologist and* expert on paranormal phenomena probes into the mind of the believer to uncover hoaxes. See “to do” list, this issue. McCarthy Arts Center, St. Michael’s College, Colchester, 7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 654-2535.

kids ‘RUGRATS’: See October 31, 1, 4 & 7 p.m.

sport M EN ’S TE N N IS: See October 3 1 ,1 0 a.m. - noon. BU RN T R O CK M OUNTAIN HIKE: Move at a steady pace on this “moder ately difficult” five-miler along the Hedgehog Brook Trail. Meet at Montpelier High School, 11:15 a.m. Free. Info, 223-7035. MT. ASCUTN EY HIKE: Get moun tain lore and natural history on a “mod erate” six-miler led by Jon Kim of the Vermont Geological Survey. Meets at Gutterson Field House, UVM, Burlington, 8 a.m. Free. Info, 660-2834.

etc FULL M O O N RITUAL: Bring food, a cushion and a “memento o f one who has passed through the Veil” to this pagan potluck celebration o f the frill moon. Unitarian Universalist Society, Burlington, 152 Pearl St., Burlington, 6 p.m. Donations. Info, 658-9689. M CAUCTION : Your bidding benefits the programs of the Ronald McDonald

coming-of-age story concerns a young French boy with feminine ways. Welden Theatre, St. Albans, 7 p.m. $3.50. Info, 324-1507. ‘BEAU TIFUL T H IN G ’: Two young men explore their sexuality against the bleak backdrop o f working-class London in this poignant — but not preachy — love story. Martin Luther King Lounge, Billings Student Center, UVM, Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 656-2060.

art

m onday drama ‘RULE O F T H U M B ': The Champlain Arts Theatre Company begins a threeweek run o f short plays with big social messages as they stage this drama about domestic violence and sexual assault. North Lounge, Billings Student Center, UVM, Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 656-3437. ‘STAGE LEFT O R R IG H T ’: A veter an stage manager and director for the Metropolitan Opera, Paula Suozzi dis cusses her work behind-the-scenes at the McCarthy Arts Center, St. Michael’s College, Colchester, 7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 654-2535. ‘BIG N IG H T, L IT T LE M U RD ER’: You get mystery with your meal at a

‘MA VIE EN ROSE’: This tender

words M IN IM AL PRESS CO LLECTIV E: The local literary group teams up with New Hampshire writer and publisher Roy Morrison to talk “co-op activities.” Rhombus Gallery, 186 College St., Burlington, 8 p.m. Donations. Info, 865-9603. CANADIAN LITERATURE SERIES: David Brown leads a literary tour of our northern neighbor through Robertson Davies’ Fifth Business. Wake

dinner theater production hosted by Ye Olde England Inne, Stowe, 6 p.m. $38. Info, 253-7558.

film

‘DAY O F T H E D EA D ’: Fruit, flowers and photos adorn altars to deceased community members at this exhibit commemorating the dead according to Latin-American custom. St. Edmund’s Hall, St. Michael’s College, Colchester. 8 a.m. - 9 p.m. Free. Info, 654-2454.

Robin, Shelburne, 7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 985-8307. M ILLEN N IU M PO ETS: Local poet Paul McRay discusses the work of poets Stephen Dobyns and Stephen Dunn and implications for the new millenni um. Rutland Free Library, 7 p.m. Free.

continued on page 3 2

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action plan at UVM’s Job Search Strategies seminar. The

UNIVERSITY VERMONT

Call (802)434-7257 for a color brochure of more exciting adventures! *

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Hike • Ski • Sea Kayak • Explore • LLama Pack • Snowshoe

SATURDAY, OCT.

Saturday, October 31 10:00 am- 3:00 pm *

HALLOWEEN PARTY

R O B E R T HULL FLEM IN G M USEUM U VM , C olchester Ave., B urlington

2 DAY BASH!

Oct 30: W iilie Edwards Oct 31: Jimmy Branca, Bloozotomy Adult & Kid Prizes

* V E R B A L A P P R A IS A L S $6.50 ($5 Museum members) per item

PAY FOR FIVE GET THE SIXTH FREEH Quilts, Art Deco, Silver, China, Glass, Jewelry, Maps, Paintings, Drawings, Oriental Rugs, Dolls, Furniture

INFORMATION 802/656-0750

SUNDAYS

F re e P a rk in g !!

Stoned In Saigon All Pints $2

M e d ia sponsor

2 f '“ IOM

TU ESD AYS

$2.75 Vodka Drinks & Pints All day & A ll night Madame St. Leveau Tarot Card Readings

F la m in g ® V in ta g e F u r n is h in g s

Live M usic every F R I D A Y & S A T U R D A Y Night

'M r* 'M)»i fur, '■ in T H E T E n T

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•Movie & Show, 9pm •dj Little Martin spinning in the te n t im m ediately follow ing IM 5IDE

•Dancing, 10pm •Costume Contest (winners announced a t la m )

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‘

aikido AIKIDO: Adults, Mondays - Fridays, 5:45-6:45 p.m. and 7-8:15 p.m., Saturdays, 9-11:45 a.m. Children, Tuesdays & Thursdays, 3:45-4:45 p.m. Aikido of Champlain Valley, 17 E. Allen St., Winooski. $40/month intro special. Info, 654-6999. Study this graceful, flow ing

p.m. The Book Rack, Wnooski. $40. Register, 655-0231. Learn where and how

through Saturday. Vermont Brazilian JiuJitsu Academy, 4 Howard St., Burlington. Info, 660-4072 or 253-9730. Escape fear

how to awaken creativity through discussion

JOURNAL: Six Thursdays, November 12 through December 17, 3:30-5 p.m. The Book Rack, Wnooski. $59. Register, 6550231. Kids 10 and up provoke, exercise and

w ith an integrated self-defense system based

markets.

and exercises.

stim ulate their imaginations through jour

on technique, not size, strength or speed.

‘RE VISION — SEEING AGAIN AND SEEING TH ROUGH’: Six Mondays, November 2 - December 7, 6-8 p.m. The Book Rack, Wnooski. $88. Register, 6550231. Learn to transform your first draft

Mondays, November 9-23, 6:30-8:30 p.m. The Book Rack, Winooski. Register, 655-0231. A uthor Shirley Knapp discusses

dance SWING LESSONS: Six-week session starting November 29. Burlington. $40/six weeks. Info, 862-9033. Learn

nal writing.

to fin d , approach and write fo r regional

spirit

language

‘SHAMANIC JOURNEYING WEEK END’: Saturday, October 31, 10 a.m. - 6 p.m. and Sunday, November 1, 11 a.m. 6 p.m. Spirit Dancer Books, 125 S. Wnooski Ave., Burlington. $140. Info, 660-8060. Shamanic practitioner Laurie

astrology

healing

STREET SPANISH I: Six Mondays, November 9 - December 14, 6:30-9 p.m. The Book Rack, Wnooski. $108. Register, 655-0231. Gain a solid language base on which to build, hablando Espanol

MOON PHASES: Two Wednesdays, November 4 & 11, 7-9 p.m. The Book Rack, Winooski. $38. Register, 655-0231.

FOOT REFLEXOLOGY: Four Mondays,

from the first class.

Sivonen teaches “p ower anim al retrieval"

VERSE — A WORKSHOP FOR POETS : Five Tuesdays, November 3 December 1, 7-9 p.m. The Book Rack, Wnooski. $73. Register, 655-0231. Bards

November 2, 9, 16 and 23, 6:30-8:30 p.m. Purple Shutter Herbs, Main St., Burlington. $85. Info, 865-HERB.

ITALIAN: Ongoing individual and group classes, beginner to advanced, adults and children. Burlington. Info, 865-4795.

and “spirit guide" communication.

w ith some experience gain a working knowl

ence on your feelings and behaviors.

Explore fu n and easy reflexology to relax all

Learn to speak this beautiful language from

body-aw areness

parts o f the body.

a native speaker and experienced teacher.

herbs

meditation

HERBS TO DEFEND W INTER’S WOES: Sunday, November 1, 1-3:30 p.m. Purple Shutter Herbs, Main St., Burlington. $26. Info, 865-HERB. Learn

‘FULL-BORE LIVING’: Saturday, November 7, 1-5 p.m. Spirit Dancer Books, 125 S. Wnooski Ave., Burlington. Donations. Info, 660-8060. I f you dream

about the many natural remedies used to

about a “'someday " that never comes, explore

workshop on “ fin d in g home through the

dancer and a yoga therapist team up to help

treat colds, flus, earaches and other winter

*'full-bore " living through stories and guided

indigenous nature o f the hum an soul. "

you explore your relationship w ith your

illnesses.

meditation.

body.

TONICS AND ELIXERS: Thursday,

business

November 5, 6-8:30 p.m. Purple Shutter Herbs, Main St., Burlington. $25. Info, 865-HERB. Discover how tonics and elixers

‘THE WAY OF TH E SUFI’: Tuesdays, 7:30-9 p.m. S. Burlington. Free. Info, 658-2447. This Sufi-style meditation incor

SPIRITUAL EMERGENCY: Eight Thursdays, November 19 through January 21, 7-9 p.m. Soulworks, 35 King St., Burlington. Info, 864-6616, ext. 1.

porates breath, sound and movement.

Individuals experiencing acute despair due

m artial art to develop flexibility, confidence and self-defense skills.

Lindy Hop, the original style o f swing.

Learn about lunar phases and their influ

‘EMBRACING OUR BODIES — EMBRACING OURSELVES’: Saturday and Sunday, November 21 and 22, 9:30 a.m. - 5 p.m. and 9:30 a.m. - 1 p.m. Guided Yoga Studio, 35 King St, Burlington. $160. Register, 860-9927. A

‘GETTING SERIOUS’: November 2, 9, 16 and 23. Women’s Small Business Program, Trinity College, Burlington. $115. Grants available. Info, 846-7160. Explore the possibilities and realities o f busi ness ownership, assess your skills and interests and devebp a “capital" idea.

‘ORGANIZING FOR MAXIMUM EFFICIENCY’: November 5 and 12, 6-8 p.m. Women’s Small Business Program, Trinity College, Burlington. $50. Grants available. Info, 846-7160. Increase the pro ductivity o f your sm all business by learning to organize office space, paper flo w and time.

computer CYBERSKILLS VERMONT: Ongoing day, evening and weekend classes. Old North End Technology Center, 279 N. Winooski Ave., Burlington. $39-349. Info, 860-4057, ext. 20. Take classes in computer basics, Windows 95, Office 9 7

can be used to bring the body into optimum balance.

hom eschooling DEMYSTIFYING RESEARCH PAPERS: Six Wednesdays, November 11 through December 16, 10 a.m. - noon. The Book Rack, Winooski. $88. Register,

sit there!

MEDITATION: First & third Sundays, 10 a.m. - noon. Burlington Shambhala Center. Free. Info, 658-6795. Instructors

655-0231. Teenage homeschoolers learn the

teach non-sectarian and Tibetan Buddhist

how to write a great research paper.

practices.

kendo

GUIDED MEDITATION: Sundays, 10:30 a.m. The Shelburne Athletic Club,

KENDO: Ongoing Wednesdays and Thursdays, 6:45-8:30 p.m. Warren Town Hall. Donations. Info, 496-4669. Develop

Shelburne Commons. Free. Info, 9852229. Practice guided meditation fo r relax

focus, control and power w ith this Japanese

photography

samurai sword-fencing m artial art.

kids ‘MOVE AND LEARN’: Saturday, November 7, 10 a.m. - noon. The Book Rack, Wnooski. $25. Register, 655-0231.

ation and focus.

PHOTOGRAPHY: Private and group, basic and intermediate classes. Grand Isle or Burlington. Info, 372-3104. Learn darkroom skills as well as how to choose, use ative style.

problem-solving, math and language skills

pottery

creative process

through movement and literature.

MOVE AND LEARN, INTEGRAT

POTTERY CLASSES: Ongoing day,

‘TH E CREATIVE SPIRIT AND HER SHADOWS’: Wednesdays, 9:30 a.m. -

ING LITERATURE ACROSS TH E CURRICULUM: Tuesday, November 10,

evening and weekend classes. Vermont Clay Studio, Rt. 100, Waterbury Center.

noon. Charlotte. Mondays, 6:30-9 p.m. Burlington. $30/wcek. Info, 425-5433.

4-6 p.m. The Book Rack, Winooski. $25. Register, 655-0231. Elementary educators,

Info, 224-1126 ext 41. Enjoy the pleasures

Theresa Bacon leads a 12-week support

librarians and caregivers explore ways to

group to work through blocks in the creative

teach problem-solving, math and language

self-defense

process.

skills through movement and literature.

BRAZILIAN JIU-JITSU: Ongoing class

‘CREATING JOYFULLY’: Three

TH E CARE AND FEEDING OF A

es for men, women and children, Monday

'X-J

CyberSkills VERMONT

and challenges o f working w ith clay.

Computer Training & Economic Development

‘MAKING TH E HOUSE OF TH E WORLD’: Friday through Sunday, November 13-15, 10 a.m. - 6 p.m. Middlcbury. $150. Register, 453-5072.

about how to pursue a career in writing fo r businesses and organizations.

‘CREATIVITY ON CALL, BECOM ING A MORE PRODUCTIVE WRITER’: Saturday, November 14, 10

M ayan Shaman M artin Prechtel offers this

a.m. - 5 p.m. $69. The Book Rack, Wnooski. Register, 655-0231. Discover how to call dependably upon your Muse instead o f w aiting fa r her sporadic visits.

POETRY WORKSHOP: Thursdays, 1 p.m. Ilsley Public Library, Middlebury.

to lossfin d opportunity fo r healing and

Free. Info, 388-7523. Bring a poem or two

growth in suffering.

to read and discuss a t this ongoing work

stress managem ent

shop.

yoga YOGA: Wednesdays, 7 p.m. Green Mt. Learning Center, 13 Dorset Lane, Williston. $8. Info, 872-3797. Practice

MEDITATION/STRESS MANAGE MENT: Ongoing Thursdays, 8:30-9 a.m., 9-10 a.m. The Maltex Building, Pine St., Burlington. First class free. Info,

yoga w ith Deborah Binder.

BEECHER HILL YOGA: Monday-

862-6931. Theresa Bacon offers inform a

Saturday, daytime & evening classes for all

tion, support, exercises and consultation in

levels. Info, 482-3191. Get private or

meditation and stress management, j , \

group instruction in therapeutic yoga, vigor

support groups

ous yoga, yoga fo r pregnancy or yoga fo r health and well-being.

NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS: Ongoing daily groups. Various locations in Burlington, S. Burlington, St. Albans and Plattsburgh. Free. Info, Help Line, 862-4516. I f you’re ready to stop using

BURLINGTON YOGA: Mondays, 5:30 and 7 p.m. Flynn Gallery, 148 Main St. Info, 658-3013. F ind healing through Iyengar style yoga.

YOGA VERMONT: Daily classes, 12 p.m., 5:30 p.m. and 7:30 p.m. Saturday and Sunday, 9:30 a.m. Chace Mill, Burlington. Info, 660-9718. Astanga style

drugs, this group o f recovering addicts can offer inspiration.

“p ower"yoga classes offer sweaty fa n fa r all

‘OH, SAY, CAN YOU SEE WHAT YOU’RE SAYING?’: Wednesday, November 4, 6-9 p.m. The Book Rack,

levels o f experience.

SHELBURNE ATHLETIC CLUB YOGA: Mondays, 5:30 p.m., Tuesdays

Wnooski. $25. Register, 655-0231. For

and Thursdays, 11 a.m. The Shelburne Athletic Club, Shelburne Commons. Info, 985-2229. Classes in Astanga yoga are

women only. W rite out your complaints and gain insight as a group into how you feel and w hat you want.

offered.

writing ‘WRITING FOR REGIONAL MAR KETS’: Saturday, October 31, 10 a.m. - 2

.S p ir it © INCENSE MASSAGE OILS CANDLES

IBM Key Bank Bell Atlantic UVM Extention Program USDA Fund for Rural America Greater Burlington Industrial Corp. U.S. Small Business Administration VT Department of Employment & Training Micro-Business Development Programs Computer Technology Centers Network L. C. Regional Chamber of Commerce Women’s Small Business Program Business Information Center Center for Civic Networking W. K Kellogg Foundation

CRAFTING SUPPLIES

My computer manual was written by aliens!

J^ a n c e r

JEWELRY CRYSTALS TAROT DECKS JOURNALS DRUMS BIRTH CHARTS

□ V T h X ( A S V N C I*

(We canhelp!)___ \ O

-8 8 8 -S O S -G E E K On-Site PC, Mac and Network Troubleshooting, Custom Tutoring

HALLOWEEN CELEBRATION!

I G

u r l i n g t o n ’s

A U

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W S

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11/7 - FU LL BORE LIVING • 11/12 - DRUM CIRCLE 11/13 - MAGICK 101 Call f o r in fo & c o m p le te w o rk s h o p lis tin o s 125 S. WINOOSKI AVE. BURLINGTON, VT • 6 6 0 -8 0 6 0

L ocal. Mu sic

O n

Web S

Come id costume & receive a treat. H pm Samfiain Ceremony 20% off all Wieea Boots & Divination Deefcs - Plus a raffle.

R ent-a-G eek

-Books i G lffs

at the O.N.E. Community/Technology Center

(8 0 2 ) 8 6 0 -4 0 5 7 e x t. 20

‘SELL YOUR WRITING SKILLS TO BUSINESSES’: Two Tuesdays, November 10 and 17, 6:30-9 p.m. The Book Rack, Wnooski. $52. Register, 655-0231. Learn

'★ <2 *<2 * < a * @ * ' 2 *<2 *<2 *<2 *<2 * <s * <s *< 2 * € * < 2 * @ * ‘g * < 2 * @ *

In P a r t n e r s h ip w ith :

279 North Winooski Avenue Burlington. VT 05401

edge o f poetic form s and the uses and abuses o f rhyme.

women

Kids fiv e to eight and their parents explore

Private and custom classes are also available.

‘SPIRIT RELEASEMENT’: Saturday, November 7, 1-4 p.m. Soulworks, 35 King St., Burlington. $20/class. Register, 860-7287. Learn about the phenomenon

and exploit the camera to express your cre

applications, Internet or Web site basics.

into the story you m eant to tell.

and interfering effects o f “spirit attachm ent."

MEDITATION: Thursdays, 7-8:30 p.m. Green Mountain Learning Center, 13 Dorset Lane, Suite 203, Williston. Free. Info, 872-3797. Don’t ju st do something,

Cin e !

D ite

Sno'WteFarm yineya TheN

Info, 773-1860.

kids STORYTIM E: Children from three to five enjoy stories, songs, fingerplays and crafts. South Burlington Community Library, 11 a.m. Free. Info, 652-7080.

U i

A limit

ntity remains avt

Home o f the international award-winning B A C O ^ Q IR ! >S11AM- 4:3j KSGIVINh RM-F HO' 190 West Shore Roa<

sport X -CO U N TRY R U N N IN G : Runners race against the clock on a mountain bike trail. Palmers Sugarhouse, Shelb urne, 5:30 p.m. Free. Info, 985-5054. M O UN TAIN BIKE RACING: Competitive cyclists wend their ways along maple trails in 5K, 10K and 15K races throughout the fall. Palmers Sugarhouse, Shelburne, 6 p.m. $5. Info, 985-5054.

DEC 31

ont 05486 » 802-372-W IN E(9463)

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Q uality used reco rd s, tap e s and cd ’s

4 Fa11

1998

Vinyl Destination - Formerly Yesterday & Today Records

UPSTAIRS 2 00 MAIN ST.. BURLINGTON • 862-5363 Hours: Mon - Sat 11-5:30 Sun 12-5

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Vermont

Fall

1998

tvents

Chamber

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223-0855. ‘T H E FU TU R E O F READING IN T H E DIGITAL AG E’: Interface Culture author Steven Johnson gives

SALE: The whole family finds deals

p.m. $75. Info, 875-2751.

Synagogue, North Prospect St., Burlington, 10 a.m. - 1 p.m. Free. v Info, 862-2311. ‘G E T O U T T H E VO TE’ PARTY:

J ohn Thade' s

On the “Participation Tour” — a pub crawl-cum-political discussion — Fred Tuttle and other candidates convene for some last-minute handshakes. Three Needs, Burlington, 7:30 p.m.

BROADWAY ALL-TIME FAVORITES With Pianist Beverly Gaylord

Free. Info, 658-2739. LITE-N -LEN S CAMERA CLUB: Lay your cards — er, your slides and

"A True Crow d Pleaser" Vermont Magazine

prints — on the table at this post foliage viewing session. Delahanty Hall, Trinity College, Burlington, 7-9 p.m. Free. Info, 878-0627. CARNIVORE CONSERVATION: Wildlife biologists recount tales from

"A b solutely W o n d erfu l" Vermont Green Mountain Guide

Thade's Favorites Are All Knockouts" Vermont Vacations Magazine

S a t u r d a y , Nov 14 at 7 : 3 0 p m Reservations 24 Hours Toll Free C h ar lo tt e C o n g r e g a ti o n a l Church C harlotte, Vermont 1-800-559-7070 Adults $12 Seniors $7 Children & Students Free

African safaris in an effort to save wild things at home and abroad. North Lounge, Billings Student Center, UVM, Burlington, 7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 434-4077. ESTATE PLA N N ING W O RK

S a t u r d .i v , N o v 2 8 a t 7 : 3 0 p m S t o \v e C o m in u n i t y C li u r c h S t o \v e , V e r m o n t

P e rfo rm in g the m usic o f H ild e g a rd von Bingen: "11.000 V irgins ■the M a rtyrd o m o f S a in t U rsula

7:30 p.m. Donations. Info, 660-9036. BA TTERED W O M EN ’S SU PPO RT GRO UPS: Women Helping Battered Women facilitates a group in Burlington, 6:30-8 p.m. Free. Info, 658-1996. Also, the Shelter Committee facilitates a meeting in Montpelier, 5:30-7 p.m. Free. Info,

T E E N HEALTH CLIN IC : Teens get information, supplies, screening and treatment for sexually related prob lems. Planned Parenthood, Burlington, 3:30-6 p.m. Pregnancy testing is free. Info, 863-6326. RUM M AGE A N D NEARLY NEW on clothes, household items and toys at a weekly yard sale. Ohavi Zedek

Commerce

SH O P: Want to leave behind more inheritance and less hassle? Exercise your will at this penny-wise work shop. Sheraton Conference Center, S. Burlington, 7-9 p.m. $15. Info, 6562887. BLO O D DRIVE: Its a good deed that keeps on giving. Roll up your sleeves at the Woolen Mill Health Club, Winooski, 9 a.m. - 2 p.m. Free. Info, 658-6400. EM O T IO N S AN O N YM O US: People with emotional problems meet at the O ’Brien Center, S. Burlington,

the keynote address at this conference on the future of the written word. Lake Morey Inn, Fairlee, 9 a.m. - 3:30

Burlington High School, 7:30-9:30 p.m. $5. Info, 985-9750.

art ‘DAY O F T H E DEAD’: See November 2.

words W RITERS’ GROUP: Writers work with words at Dubie’s Cafe, Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 865-9257.

kids ‘M U SIC W ITH ROBERT RESN IK’: Kids sing songs with the musical host of Vermont Public Radios folk show “All the Traditions.” Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 11 a.m. Free. Register, 865-7216. STORY TIM E: Kids under three lis ten in at the South Burlington Community Library, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 652-7080. STORY HO UR: Kids between three and five engage in artful educational activities. Milton Public Library, 10:30 a.m. & 1 p.m.'Free. Info, 893-4644.

etc ESTATE PLANNING W ORK

tuesday music ‘RUM BA...BOM BA...RUM BOMBAZO !’: Artists from Cuba and Puerto Rico lead a workshop compar ing cultures through percussion and dance. College Street Congregational Church, Burlington, 7 p.m. $10. Info, 863-5966. CHERRY PO PPIN ’ DADDIES: When grunge was peaking in the Pacific Northwest, these tragically unhip cats were doing their own swing thing. Now they reign in the Zoot-suit Zeitgeist and play the Patrick Gym, UVM, Burlington, 7:30 p.m. $17. Info, 656-3085. AMATEUR M USICIANS O RCH ESTRA: Vermont Symphony violinist David Gusakov oversees this

SH O P: See November 2, 10 a.m. noon. HO M EOW NERSHIP ORIENTA T IO N : Potential buyers learn how to shop and pay for a home at the Burlington Community Land Trust, 179 South Winooski Ave., Burlington, 5 p.m. Free. Register, 660-0642. QUILTERS GU ILD M EETIN G: Guests are welcome at this gathering to patch together ideas for the warmblanket weather ahead. Essex Alliance Church, Old Stage Rd., Essex Junc tion, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 863-2160. O LD N O RTH EN D FARMERS MARKET: Shop for local organic produce and fresh baked goods on the triangle in front of the H.O. Wheeler School, Burlington, 3:30-6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 863-6248.

weekly harmonic convergence of ama

FREE LEGAL CLIN IC: Attorney Sandy Baird offers free legal advice to

teur musicians in the Music Room, S.

women with questions about family

C e le b r a t e T h e H arv est 3^1

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Wfeek’i c ia ls “Anonymous 4 makes the most gorgeous sound you 're likely to hear anywhere: their purity of intonation is certain to astonish anyone. ” - STEREOPHILE

iV m M m m n o n

*ancakes $3.95

Lunch Barbeque Turkey Burger

FRIDAY,

NOVEMBER

/Sweet Potatoe Fries $5.95

Dinner

7 * 3 0 pm,

The Chapel at Saint Michael’s College, Tickets: $20.00

. Apple Cider Filet Mignon served w/ candied 1 ■ M tato es $15.95

M irin -n m n c x m in n e i

HULLOINEEN NIGHT titan mi MONTPtlltR

sttmoM.

OCTORtR 3ln, 8:30m

Sponsored by

WITH One of the su p e rstar en sem bles of the early-music world, Anonymous 4 returns to the Lane Series as part of a tri-college (UVM, St. M ich ael’s an d T rin ity) c e le b ratio n of the 900th A n n iv e rsary of the birth of m edieval co m p o se r, nun, and m y stic H ildegard von Bingen.

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tvsseyjujction, VT 05452

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SERVKia CREATIVE WORD La CLNSHE

Coming 1st Annual Halloween Weekend Costume Party F r i. 10/30 vIperHouse Sat. 10/31 Rocket Band Invisible Jet Advance Tickets Available Call Lodging Available Call For Bookings

(802) 422- S019

Toadstool Harry’s Rto 4 Kllllngton B t t w n n KIHIngton Accsss Rd & SKyshlp^

ELEN law, housing difficulties and welfare problems. Room 14, Burlington City Hall, 3-5 p.m. Free. Info, 865-7200. BA TTERED W O M EN ’S SU PP O R T GRO UP: Meet in Barre, 10:30 a.m. -

MOLLY HASKELL- The author and film critic regularly featured in The New York Times explores sexual politics in cinema with the simple query: “Whose Fantasies Are We Seeing?” Center for

noon. Free. Info, 223-0855.

the Arts, Middlebury College, 4:30 p.m. Free. Info, 443-5198. ‘M ALCOLM X ’: Denzel Washington plays the controversial American Muslim leader fighting for black liber ation in the critically acclaimed epic by Spike Lee. Spaulding Auditorium, Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N .H ., 7:30 p.m. $6. Info, 603-646-2422.

4 W ed n esd ay m usic RUMBA AN D BOMBA: Folklorist and ethnomusicologist Roberta Singer explores the dance traditions o f Cuba and Puerto Rico in the context o f the African Diaspora. Flynn Gallery, Burlington, 6 p.m. Free. Info, 863-5966. D O S ALAS/TW O W IN G S: The sacred and secular mix in spirited, spir itual dance from Cuba and Puerto Rico as two troupes converge in tradi tional costumes o f the Caribbean. See story, this issue. Flynn Theatre, Burlington, 7:30 p.m. $15-23. Info, 863-5966. E W \ PO DLES: Her deep-toned voice — and three-octave range — earned this Polish contralto accolades at Carnegie Hall. Rachmaninoff and Brahms are on the vocal program at the Center for the Arts, Middlebury College, 7:30 p.m. $9. Info, 443-6433.

dram a ‘TARTUFFE’: The theater department suits up in 17th-century garb for this tour de fan e about French manners, religious fervor and a calculating house guest. McCarthy Arts Center, St. Michaels College, Colchester, 8 p.m. Free. Info, 654-2535.

art ‘DAY O F T H E D EA D ’: See November 2.

w o rd s P.R. SM ITH : The local poet, artist and musician lays down lines from Shake speare to jazz scat, with some mood enhancing lighting effects at Rhombus Gallery, 186 College St., Burlington, 8 p.m. $3-6. Info, 865-9603. B O O K D ISC U SSIO N SERIES: Readers ponder the notion o f honor as it plays out in Edith Warton’s The Age o f Innocence. South Hero Community Library, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 372-4734.

kids SO N G A N D STORYTIM E: Babies and toddlers benefit from a singing read-along. Fletcher Free Library, Burl ington, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216. H O M E SC H O O L ER S’ STORY TIM E: Stay-at-home students five and up share scary tales at the Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 1:30-2:30 p.m. Free. Info, 865-7216.

film

etc ARTS EDUCATION TOW N M EET

ING: The results are in from the greater Burlington area arts education survey. What to do with this information is next on the agenda — and up to you. Buriington City Hall Auditorium, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 865-7157. LU N C H TIM E LEC T U RE SERIES: Professors Grant Critchfield and Janet Whadey lead a discussion entitled, “Instruments o f Enlightenment, Egyptian Orientations.” Fleming Museum, UVM, Burlington, 12:15 p.m. $3. Info, 656-0750. INTERNATIONAL LECTU RE SERIES: Business School prof Ronald Savitt shares his economic insights from the Czech Republic. John Dewey Lounge, Old Mill, UVM, Burlington, 12:30 p.m. Free. Info, 656-1096.

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SEN SORY IN TEGRA TIO N W ORK SH O P: Is your kid clumsy or acci dent-prone? He may be having trouble coding and sorting sensory informa tion. Learn more at South Burlington High School, 6:30-8:30 p.m. Free. Register, 658-5315. K N IT T IN G GROUP: Needle work ers swap techniques and design ideas with other wool workers. Northeast Fiber Arts Center, S. Burlington, 10

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a.m. Free. Info, 865-4981. RAVEN AND OWL FOLKLORE: Edgar Allan Poe wasn’t first to give the raven a bad rep. Hear legends retold — and tales of dose encounters — at the North Branch Nature Center, Montpdier, 6:30-9 p.m. $6. Info, 229-6206. CIVIL WAR LETTERS: Documents from special collections offer Green Mountain perspectives on the Civil War. Northfield Elementary School, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 223-3583.

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J i m B r l d w e l l ’ s “C h a n g i n g T i m e s : T h e E v o l u t io n of Big Wall C l i m b i n g ” This slideshow will depict the history of the equipment and first acents of the mythic Tim & ridwell. Tim began climbing in Vosemite in 1402 and has over first ascents. The scope of the slides will span the globe, mamf of which are vintage slides. $ 5/$4 for UVM students. »*fi fcanfc Street &02- 860- 0l<?0

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T H E R O SE ST R E E T GALLERY in Burlington’s Old North End is seeking work for upcoming shows in visual and per forming arts. If interested, call Annette at 860-9927. W O RKS O F FIN E ART in any medium are sought to repre sent the Burlington area in the Triangle o f Excellence, a cultural and economic partnership with Plattsburgh and the Haute Richelieu region o f Quebec. Twelve artists from each area will be chosen for a touring exhibit. Drop work o ff at Contois Auditorium, Burlington City Hall, on Sunday, November 15. Info, call 865-7165.

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K A T 0 JA W 0 R S K I, MFA Thesis exhibit. Julian Scott Memorial Gallery, Johnston State College, 635-1310. Reception October 29, 5-7 p.m.

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Fantasy Portraits in Watercolor fro m y o u r fa vo rite color p h o to g ra p h

new work by Kristin Humbarger. Firehouse Center for the Visual Arts, Burlington, 865-7165. Reception October 30, 5-7 p.m.

o n g o in g J U A N P E R D lG U E R O ,

“Metamorfosis,” paintings, and F R A N K C A R M E L IT A N 0 , “The

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Spanish Years,” paintings and etch ings. Doll-Anstadt Gallery, Burlington, 864-3661. November 1-30. P A IN T IN G S by Anna Vreman. Bread & Beyond, Williston, 8932951. Through November. A M O M E N T O F R IS IN G M IS T :

Echoes o f a Journey in China, photographs by Jeffrey P. Roberts. A Single Pebble Restaurant, Berlin, 476-9700. Through January 3.

weekly

A N O D Y S S E Y O F T H E M IN D ,

G . R O Y L E V I N : C L O T H ’ D P IN S ,

B O D Y A N D S P IR IT , photographs

“portraits” on clothespins. McAuley Lobby, Trinity College, Burlington, 658-0337. Through November 24. H A R V E S T F E A S T : Cuisine & Clay, an exhibit o f handmade pottery cooking and serving pieces. Vermont Clay Studio, Waterbury, 244-1126. November 1-30.

by Christina Dick. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 863-3403. November 1-30. U R B A N V IE W S : Really Big Art show and sale by nine local artists from Caravan Arts. Mezzanine, Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 863-3403. November 1-30. N V A A A N N U A L H O L ID A Y A R T S H O W A N D S A L E , featuring mem

bers’ works in mixed media. Red Mill Craft Shop, Jericho, 8991106. October 31 - December 30. M A R Y J A N E N A Y L O R , paintings. Art Gallery o f Barre, 476-1030. Through December 5. O R G A N IC C U R V E S , watercolor paintings by Kate Hartley. Smokejacks Restaurant, Burlington, 660-2794. Through December. J A N E T V A N F L E E T , recent oil paintings, and J O Y H U C K IN S , oils and pastels. City Center, Montpelier, 563-2486. November 2 - December 6. T R A V E L S , recent paintings by Lynda Reeves McIntyre. Furchgott Sourdiffe Gallery, Shelburne, 9853848. Through November 23. M Y S T E R IE S IN S T O N E : Beyond Public Art, featuring sculptors

from Barre and beyond, Main Gallery; and P A S T M A S T E R S : History in Stone, featuring pho tographs from the archives o f the Barre Museum, South Gallery. T.W. Wood Gallery, Vermont College, Montpelier, 878-8743. Through December 20. A G IF T T O T H E C O L L E G E : The Mr.

and Mrs. Adolph WeilJr. Collection o f Master Prints, featuring 110 works on paper from the donated collection o f 257 Old Master and 19th-century European prints. H ood Museum o f Art, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N .H ., 603-6462808. Through December 20.

listings

F IN E F O L K A N D O U T S ID E R A R T :

Works from Pat Parsons’ Collection. Francis Colburn Gallery, UV M , Burlington, 6562014. Through November 13. V E R M O N T C O M P O S IT IO N , featur ing paintings and mixed media by Klara Callitri, Chuck Rak, Carrie ouillard, Carolyn Shattuck and /VPat i Hamilton Todd. Chaffee Center for the Visual Arts, Rutland, 775-0356. Through November 15. C A R IB B E A N E X P R E S S I O N S , fea turing photographic portraits o f Cuban artists by David Garten, and paintings by Alejandro Torrens and Fabre Salient. Flynn Gallery, Burlington, 863-8778. Through November 10. G R E G G IO R D A N O , portraits and paintings. Borders Cafe Espresso, Burlington, 865-5216. Through October. A L P H A B E T S O U P , new paintings featuring letters, by Elizabeth Bunsen. Alley Cat Arts, 416 Pine St., Burlington, 865-5079. Through November 23. H A N D -C O L O R E D P H O T O G R A P H S

by Victoria Blewer. Stowe Craft Gallery, 253-4693. Through October. S IL K S C R E E N P R IN T S by Sally Stetson. Shimmering Glass Gallery, Waterbury, 244-8134. Ongoing. W A TER , W ATER EV ER Y W H ER E,

featuring watercolors and oils o f water scenes by 13 Shelburne artists. Gentry Gallery at Wake Robin, Shelburne, 985-9400.

www.sevendaysvt.com

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Through November 23.. P A S T E L S by Marianne Gregoire Nealy, and H A N D -T IN T E D P H O T O G R A P H S from Vermont and Maine, by Barbara Lang. Green Mountain Power Corporation Lobby, South Burlington, 8641557. Through November 5. A C R Y L IC P A IN T IN G S by Dorothy Martinez. Chittenden Bank, main office, Burlington, 864-1557. Through November 5. L E L A N D A L P E R , watercolors. City Center Lobby, Montpelier, 4723736. Through October. 2 5 T H A N N IV E R S A R Y A LU M N I E X H IB IT , featuring multi-media

work by nine former Living/Learning students. Living/Learning Center, UVM, Burlington, 656-4200. Through November 5. A B O U Q U E T O F F L O R A L S , paint ings and drawings by Pria Cambio. Bellini’s Restaurant, Montpelier, 223-5300. Through January 1. W A T C H Y O U R B A C K ...O R Y O U R M IN D W IL L E A T Y O U ! paintings

and photographs by Javin Leonard. Working Design Gallery, Men’s Room, Burlington, 8642088. Through October. A R T R E S O U R C E A S S O C IA T IO N

membership exhibit in mixed media. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 863-3403. Through October 30. T H R O U G H T H E W IN D O W , paint ings by Francoise Nussbaumer and Barbara Rachko. Doll-Anstadt Gallery, Burlington, 864-3661. Through October. E V A N S . E I N H 0 R N , black and white photography of nudes. Red Square, Burlington, 859-8909. Through November 5. C O M P IL A T IO N S O F K N O W L E D G E :

The Diderot and Napoleonic Encyclopedias, volumes of text and engravings depicting French Enlightenment and Egyptian scholarship. Fleming Museum, Burlington, 656-0750. Through December 20. M A R IE L A P R E G R A B 0 N oil pastels and charcoal drawings. French Press Cafe, Johnson, 635-2638. Through November 7. S W E E T A P O C A L Y P S E , watercolors and pastels by Rhoda Carroll. Phoenix Rising, Montpelier, 2290522. Through October. R E C E N T W O R K S O N P A P E R , by Frank Woods. City Hall Showcases, Montpelier, 229-2766. Through November 2. F U Z Z Y L I N E S , a silent auction of ink and charcoal drawings by Jim Gerstman. Muddy Waters, Burlington, 658-0466. Through October. C L A R K R U S S E L L , metal sculpture. Rhombus Gallery, Burlington, 865-3144. Through November 6 . L A U R A E M E R S O N , recent works in oil. Daily Planet Restaurant, Burlington, 860-6885. Through October. F A C U L T Y E X H IB IT by seven mem ber-potters of the Vermont Clay Studio, Waterbury Ctr., 244-1126. Through October. L O R R A IN E M A N L E Y , paintings. Better Bagel, Williston, 864-1557. Through November. L IV Y H IT C H C O C K , paintings. Bread & Beyond, Williston, 8783473. Through November 1. P A IN T IN G S by 11 members of the Otter Creek Art Guild. Woody’s Restaurant, Middlebury, 4535997. Through November 15. A C O R N IS H H O M E C O M IN G , fea turing works by siblings Daryl,

Shari, Susan, Judith, Jim and Diane Cornish. Compost Exhibition Space, Hardwick, 4729613. Through November 19.

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D E R E K H E S S : Y E T IS A N D C O R N D O G S , posters and drawings by the

nationally known poster artist. Also, H E A T H E R H E R N 0 N : P O S T U R E , drawings and paintings. Exquisite Corpse Artsite, Burlington, 864-8040, ext. 121. Through October 30. P U L L E D IM A G E S : T H E A R T O F P R I N T M A K IN G a group show fea

turing contemporary printmakers. Helen Day Art Center, Stowe, 253-8358. Through November 21. H U B B LE’S P A S TU R E AN D T H E T R U T H A B O U T C O W S , sculpture

and paintings by Peter K.K. Williams. Helen Day Art Center, Stowe, 253-8358. Through November 21. S P A N N IN G T I M E : V E R M O N T C O V E R E D B R ID G E S , photographs by

Joseph C. Nelson. Finale, S. Burlington, 862-0713. Through October 30. P O L IT I C A L P IC T U R E S :

Confrontation and Commemoration in Recent Art, an exhibit of international artists who address social and political circumstances in their work. Fleming Museum, Burlington, 656-0750. Through December 13. N O R T H E R N V E R M O N T A R T IS T A S S O C IA T IO N , a group show and

sale by members in mixed media. Old Red Mill Gallery, Jericho, 899-1106. Through October 30. B E A D S A N D M O R E B E A D S , an exhibit from the permanent collec tion showing how European glass beads have been used in clothing, containers and more. Fleming Museum, Burlington, 656-0750. Through December. Y 0 S E M I T E V IE W S : MammothPlate Photographs by Carleton E. Watkins from the ParkMcCullough House. Historic milestones in photography from 1861. Middlebury College Museum of Art, 443-5007. Through December 13. T H E T IM E O F T H E N A B IS , the first North American exhibit of paint ings, drawings, prints, decorative art and playbills by the artists who made up the post-impressionist avant-garde in the 1890s. Montreal Museum of Fine Arts, 514-285-1600. Through November 22. E L L E N H O F F M A N , pencil draw ings, and T O M M E R W IN , paint ings. Merwin Gallery, Castleton, 468-2592. Ongoing.

Culture By M

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he two featured artists this month at DollAnstadt Gallery intro duce to Vermont viewers tech nical approaches not often seen in Burlington-area gal leries, although they are not unusual in the larger art world. New York painter Barbara Rachko works with pastels on enormous sheets o f sandpaper. She encloses the unfixed works in frames that don’t disturb their delicate sur faces. Francoise Nussbaumer, from Switzerland, creates color fields that texturally, and chro matically contrast with pat terned border areas incorpo rating stenciled shapes. The flatness o f these uniform

sources, however, like the artists themselves, are an ocean apart. Even though the craft o f stenciling probably originated in ancient Japan, there is something Roman about Nussbaumer’s work. The unti tled pieces — basically described as small, medium and large — are filled with brightly valued colors, and the brushwork sweeps to define form with the spontaneity o f a fresco painter. The large and medium pieces are textured and adorned almost like wall sections lifted from Pompeii, with patterns, fruits and leaves running along the bottom sixth o f the paintings. The remainder o f each canvas is inevitably a juicy color field o f

T A LB O T M . B R EW ER & W A LK ER E V A N S : A Family Affair. The

famous American documentary photographer shares an exhibit with his brother-in-law, works dat ing 1928-46. Christian A. Johnson Memorial Gallery, Middlebury College Museum of Art, 4432069. Through October. B R E A D A N D P U P P E T M U S E U M is open for the season, featuring hundreds of puppets and masks from 23 years of the political pup pet theater. Rt. 122, Glover, 5253031. Through October. PLEASE NOTE: Seven Days is unable to accommodate all o f the displays in our readership area, thus these listings must be restricted to exhibits in truly public viewing places. Art in business offices, lobbies and private residences or studios, with occasional exceptions, will not be accepted.

“Sometimes She Still Finds Him Charming,” by Barbara Rachko. shapes serves to unsettle the impasto o f the color fields, creating a rhythmic counter point. A common denominator between Rachko and Nussbaumer is their use o f patterning as a decorative m otif — which also is an indi cator o f the historical sources in play for each artist. Their

greenish-blue or yelloworange. Nussbaumer’s three smaller works are odalisques — chub by white females reclining midst fruity motifs. The artist spends a lot o f time in Italy, so it’s likely she’s tapped Italian historical sources. Beyond Paul Klee (who is clearly not an influence), there are rela

tively few native Swiss painters to emulate. This is Nussbaumer’s first U.S. show, but probably not her last. Barbara Rachko also looks south o f her border for inspi ration — in brightly patterned Latin-American toys. She uses an ensemble cast o f the riotously painted toys in her “Domestic Threats” series. The application o f materials and complex compositions contribute to the telling o f each story, but her overriding narrative interest relies on her cast o f toy-box escapees. These are toys with teeth. In “Sometimes She Still Finds H im Charming,” a painted senorita with a ciga rette stares past a mustachioed Don Juan who seems to be imploring her to reconcile. A more folksy maiden is squashed under the bed, but we know from another piece, “Scene Four: Living Room ,” that the Don had once wooed her as well. The geometric underpin nings o f Rachko’s composi tions create a deceptive scale in each piece. The spaces o f this Toy Story-meets-Brazil world are shallow interiors, and the utilization o f precisely organized interlocking colors throughout is reminiscent o f synthetic Cubism. But unlike Cubist painters, Rachko cre ates major works in pastel. Though the hues are blended and layered, there are no brushstrokes to help establish movement. The pieces are held together with only color and structure. Another small drama includes “At First He Vehemendy Denied the Accusation” and “The Leader Challenged.” In these a katchina-like figure is the cen tral character. He and his cadre o f demonic automatons are stared down by groups o f smaller denizens o f the play room, who are perhaps chaf ing under the leader’s fiery, winged authority. How the power struggle will end cannot be guessed. Rachko’s charac ters are as inscrutable as they are vivid. Luckily, the exhibi tion itself is much more acces sible. (7)

“ Through the W indow ,” paintings by Francoise Nussbaum er and Barbara Rachko. Doll-Anstadt Gallery, Burlington. Through October.

October 2 8 ,1998 ' SEVEN DAYS -

page 35

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APT p u p il *** For anyone who saw Bryan Singer’s The Usual Suspects and wondered whether there’s more to the filmmaker than cinematic razzledazzle, his latest may provide some insight, as it does its share o f razzling while dazzling surpris ingly little. Ian McKellen and Brad Renfro star in this adaptation o f an old Stephen King novella about an all-American high school kid with a heart o f unsuspected darkness. When a history class on the Second World War piques his interest in the Third Reich, Renfros character — a model stu dent and star athlete — finds himself drawn to further study on the subject. He also finds a real live Nazi, whom he recognizes from an old his tory book photo, who lives under an assumed name in the same town and whom Renfro balckmails into sharing horrific firsthand accounts o f what it was like to actually commit those leg endary atrocities. McKellen gives a spooky, transfixing perfor mance as the deranged old sadist, a whiskeyswilling devil barely able to hold back a giggle

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while recounting his crimes. The relationship between the two transmutes throughout the film. In the beginning, the young man holds all the cards, at one point even making his victim dress in a Nazi uniform and then issuing a rapid-fire barrage o f orders like a drill instructor in hell. Eventually McKellen turns the tables to an extent, but through it all a sick bond sur vives, and the only real question becomes whether or not the outside world will uncover their twisted secret. The cast, which includes David Schwimmer as a doofus guidance counselor, offers subtle and complete work here, but Singer’s vision lets them down, providing too little insight into the adolescents power fantasies and tinging the tale with too little sense o f light-of-day nightmare. All the same, this is a bracing film. King may have written the story before young Americans had begun bringing guns to school to kill their classmates, and to commit all sorts o f other crimes which would have been, until recently, unthinkable. But, now that they have, what’s needed are answers to questions that Singer’s film barely beginy'to ask.

T HROUGH

THURSDAY. NOV 5

NICKELODEON CINEMAS

showtimes

College Street, Burlington, 8 6 3 -9 5 1 5 .

ETHAN ALLEN CINEMAS

9 :3 0 . Apt Pupil 1:50, 4 :4 0 , 7 :1 5 , 9 :4 5 . Beloved 1, 4 :3 0 ,

8 :3 0 . Practical Magic 1:40, 4 :1 0 , 6 :4 0 , 9. What Dreams

Firelight* 1:30, 4, 6 :3 0 , 8 :4 5 . Pleasantville 1:15, 3 :4 5 , 7, North Avenue, Burlington, 8 6 3 -6 0 4 0 .

Why Do Fools Fall in Love 4:35, 9. Knock Off 12:50, 2:40, 4:30, 6:30, 10:10. Dr. Doolittle 12:45, 2:40, 7. Parent Trap

May Come 2, 6:5 0 . There’s Something About Mary 4:20, 9 :2 0 . All shows daily.

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Soldier 12:50, 3 :4 0 , 7, 9 :5 5 . Practical Magic 12, 2:20, 4:4 0 , 7:1 0 , 9 :3 5 . The Bride of Chucky 7:25, 9:4 5 . Antz 12 :10, 2:1 5 , 4 :2 5 , 7 :1 5 , 9 :2 0 . A Night at the Roxbury

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12:15, 2:1 0 , 4 :1 5 , 7:20, 9:30. What Dreams May Come 12 :40, 3 :3 0 , 6 :4 0 , 9 :2 5 . Ronin 12 :30, 3 :2 0 , 6 :5 0 , 9:40.

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Urban Legends 12:50, 3 :3 0 , 6 :5 0 , 9 :2 0 . Soldier 12:40, 3 :4 0 , 7, 9 :3 5 . The Bride of Chucky 9:30. There’s Something

About Mary 1, 3 :5 0 , 6 :4 0 . Antz 12:30, 2 :2 0 , 4 :1 0 , 7:10. A

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stars in the big-screen version

Morgan Freeman and Robert

o f back-stabbing, power-lusting

o f John Steakley’s 1992 novel

Duvall star as a U.S. President

characters to disturb the peace

about the adventures o f a pro

and an astronaut trying to keep

o f the pridelands.

romance about the breadth o f one woman’s passion. JO H N C A R P E N T E R ’ S

shorts

rating scale:

*****

straight-to-video sequel Disney went back to the drawing board

N R = not review ed

A N T Z(N R ) In the first o f * the year’s two — count ’em: ■ ifi. Dunne adapts Alice Hoffman’s two — animated bug sagas, 1995 best-seller about a pair o f Woody Allen provides the '5 - » ’* y!*V *' * ~~^ ■'4 - &s-* ^ J voice o f a drone who longs for sisters descended from a long line o f witches. Sandra Bullock both a more independent life and a female ant played by and Nicole Kidman star. Sharon Stone. With additional S L U M S OF B E V E R L Y vocal stylings courtesy o f H IL L S (N R ) Marisa Tomei, Sylvester Stallone, Jane Carl Reiner and Natash Curtain and Christopher Lyonne head the cast o f this Walken. darkly comic look at the dys A NIGHT AT THE ROXfunctional family life o f a late BURY (NR) SN L sketch vets 7 0 s teen. Tamara Jenkins . directs. . * . . , , . . . . . . . . i. ■ Will Ferrell and Chris‘K a t t ^ f r 1 being their popular barhop: P L E A S A N T V IL L E (N R ) ping characters to the big Two present-day teens find -'screen.' '-v themselves trapped in an old R O N l N * * * * Robert black-and-white family sitcom DeNiro, Jean Reno and in the directorial debut from Stellan Skarsgard star in this Gary Ross. With Tobey saga o f international intrigue Maguire, Reese Witherspoon from director John and William H . Macy. ‘ Frankenheimer. S O L D IE R (N R ) From the URBAN LEGENDS (NR) i guy who wrote Blade Runner know what Jamie Blanks did and Unforgiven comes a sci-fi last summer — the director Western about an aging space decided to jum p on the lucra cowboy banished to a barren tive teen-slasher bandwagon. planet. Kurt Russell stars. Jared Leto and Alicia Witt are BE LO V E D (N R )O p ta h teamed in this gory story Winfrey and Danny Glover about a killer who terrorizes a star in Jonathan Demme’s college campus. adaptation o f Toni Morrisons RUSH HOUR (NR) Chris Pulitzer Prize-winning novel Tucker and Jackie Chan star in about an escaped slave haunt this action comedy about an : ;. ed by a murdered child. LAPD detective who experiB R ID E OF C H U C K Y ences culture clash when he’s (N R ) Shouldn’t there be a teamed with a cop from Hong statute o f limitations on Kong. Brett Retner directs. sequels? First, there was The TH ER E’S SOMETHING Odd Couple //. Then the longABOUT M A R Y *** There unawaited Halloween H 2 O. may be something about And now this, a fourth install Mary, but there’s nothing ment in the dormant, dead as about this movie that’s worth a doornail Childs Play series. buying a ticket to see, since This time around the homici almost all the film’s funny stuff dal doll toys with Jennifer is available for free in its pre Tilly. views. Ben Stiller plays a one W HAT D R E A M S MAY time nerd who can’t get over a C O M E * * * * Robin x high school crush on Cameron Williams stars in Vincent Diaz. From the folks who Ward s visually sumptuous but brought you Dumb and emotionally gruelling allegory concerning one man’s quest to Dumber, reunite with his family in the Si p r a c t ic a l :: M A G IC * * ,/ 2 Griffin

TH E PARENT TRAP (N R ) From the team behind Father o f the Bride comes this update o f the Disney classic about twins who conspire to reconcile their parents. Dennis Quaid, Natasha Richardson and Lindsay Lohan co-star. A R M A G ED D O N ** The forecast for July calls for testosterone. Lots and lots o f testosterone. In advance o f noisy, routine-looking action packages like Lethal Weapon 4, M ark ofZorro and The Negotiator, comes the latest from Jerry ( Top Gun, Crimson Tide) Bruckheimer — the noisty, routine-looking story o f a bunch o f ultra-macho space cowboys who try to stop an oncoming comet from wip ing out the world. Bruce Willis, Ben Affleck, Will Patton and Steve Buscemi star. Michael (Bad Boys) Bay directs.

a piece of the action Time once again for the version of our game in which we freeze an action-packed frame from a well-known film and extract a pivotal puzzle-shaped piece from the picture. Your job, as always, is to come up with the name of the movie anyway.

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Look Dad, No Hands Continued from page 1 5

did. Bufcmy feet would only shuffle retardedly back and forth. She took o ff my shirt. She took o ff my belt and tied my hands behind my back with it. This was more than I want ed for my 20 guilders. Then, with a quick sleightof-hand to my pants, a bit o f a “ta-da” tug, suddenly, my thighs felt a little breezy. I was afraid to look down, but I did. Sure enough, my pants had headed down to the party start ing in my shoes. Now, guys, I know what you’re about to ask, and the answer is no, thank God. Believe me, it crossed my

mind, too.What if my down stairs neighbor (if you catch my drift) hears all the excitement and wants to see what’s going on? Call it luck, but the deerin-headlights sensation was so numbing, my neighbor was oblivious to the commotion. I thought maybe if I could get my eyes to roll into the back o f my head the woman might think I was blacking out and would let me go. No such luck. She gestured me to plant my pasty bum on the glowing dance floor, and while the lights flashed beneath my ass and shined up between my knees, I got to thinking. Thinking o f all the other stripped-and-bound suckers who had come before me. It

didn’t offer much consolation, but I was now a part o f a brotherhood whose ranks grew by three shows a day, seven days a week. All this reflection turned to heart-attack fear, however, when she put my head in a stronghold like a rodeo wran gler. I was a calf being held for the slaughter, frozen'as she reached into the velvet pouch to produce the biggest dildo I had ever laid eyes on. Oh, no! She wouldn’t, would she? She would. She shoved the base o f that thing so far down my throat that I gagged. My eyes welled with tears. Drool trickled down the corners o f my mouth. I was going to die choking on a Dutch stripper’s

snatched that thing out o f my mouth and stormed off the stage. The music stopped, and there I sat — stripped o f both clothes and dignity. Tied and broken. Would someone please untie me? N o one came, so it was up to me to flip and flop like a seizing fish in the deafen ing silence. N o use sobbing, just one more flop, maybe a spastic jerk, and yes, a hand broke free. I pulled up my pants, grabbed my shirt, bowed to my audience, and got the hell off the stage with my belt still lashed to my wrist. I saw the look on my* friends’ faces and knew, for them, it was worth every second. Now, have I got a lesson for my son. ®

dildo. I could see the obituary in my hometown paper: “Local Boy’s Body Found Naked, Tied at European Sex Show. Friends Laughing Too Hard to Help.” Then the stripper straddled me, and it didn’t take a genius to figure out what was coming next. Apparently I was sup posed to try to — how should I put this? — penetrate her with it. Dad never covered this kind o f plunge. Being the sport I am, I tried to oblige, but she just wiggled away. When it became obvious she had no intention o f actually letting me succeed, I lost interest. Besides, I was getting dizzy from the lack o f oxygen. She must have sensed my lack o f commitment, because she

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B u lly P u lp it C o n tin u e d fro m page 1 3 dence-building exercises. After all, what does fighting have to do with education? “People somehow cant see the two together,” WebsterDoyle concedes. “They either teach one or the other.” But without real confidence, he adds, the intellectual under standing o f conflict remains bound by biology. “The words don’t do anything. The intel lectual understanding doesn’t do anything,” he says. “It’s not enough.” Paradoxically, the confi dence to avoid conflict comes from knowing you could han dle yourself in a scrape if you needed to. It can make the difference, Webster-Doyle says, between needing to find out whodunnit — the aim o f his famous distant relation, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, who, incidentally, was a practitioner o f jujitsu — and stopping someone from doing it in the first place. Confidence — right. Easy for him to say. He’s got a black belt. The only face he needs to worry about saving is the other guy’s. What about those o f us more likely to buy running shoes for self-defense? Webster-Doyle is quick to point out that confidence is a mental state, one that can be achieved through mental preparation for different con flict scenarios. When Atrium is working with kids — he takes his “fighting words” to area schools — that prepara tion follows the three P’s: Prevent, Prepare and Protect. Translated for an adult audi ence — at martial arts schools, for instance — that comes out ARM: Avoid, Resolve and Manage. Avoiding means simply that — not going into the bar that regularly spills out guys in a flurry o f fists and pointytoed boots; not taking your girlfriend to dollar-pitcher night at the local sports bar. Resolving is where things get tricky. And it all begins, as Webster-Doyle says, with the knowledge that “there are more alternatives than to fight or run away. We’re just not taught them.” Knowing these alternatives ahead o f time, and even practicing them, can be a confidence booster on its own, helping to stave o ff the biological impulses that kick in when conflict arises. Among the strategies he proposes for dealing with bul lies are: responding with humor (although depending on how funny you are, this could make things worse); befriending the bully; ignor ing him; agreeing with him; disagreeing with him but refusing to fight; appealing to an authority (the bartender, a bouncer, the cops); reasoning with him; walking away or assuming a martial arts stance

(but only if you can walk the walk). M anaging. . .well, that means dealing with the con flict if it doesn’t go away, using physical means if neces sary. In all cases, the appropri ate response depends on the conflict. That’s why WebsterDoyle advocates having a repertoire o f non-physical responses at your disposal, just as a boxer or martial artist has a repertoire o f blocks and moves. Carrying the analogy further, he says that the rules o f engagement in verbal con flicts are very much like physi cal fights, even before they escalate to that level. “You’re trying to keep him off bal ance. You’re really sparring with him, but you’re mental spar ring,” he says. “If he’s got the upper hand, you’ve got to get that control back. Keep con trol, keep the upper hand, then get away” from the conflict. Although Webster-Doyle says that most bullies will be surprised by any resistance at all, he strongly warns against backpedaling, noting that lions almost never attack things approaching them — you can stay in control by not retreating. Rather, stand your ground by standing slightly to the side, don’t make sudden gestures, and make as much direct eye contact as possible without being confrontational. All the pondering and pos turing aside, the sheer danger o f real fighting — it’s much messier than it looks on the movie or T V screen — is the most compelling reason to avoid it, according to Webster-Doyle. And while you may not be surprised by his assertion that action heroes like Bruce Willis couldn’t “punch their way out o f a paper bag in real life,” more pertinent is his observation that untrained fighters are at far greater risk o f fatal injury than those trained in martial arts. Webster-Doyle and his ilk know how to kill you as well as how not to. The meathead who just stole your barstool may not be so wellrounded. Lest you still think that all this “just walk away” stuff is dishonorable, Webster-Doyle observes that in a truly com plete martial arts education, you learn that the highest skill is to defeat the enemy without fighting. And if the next Schwarzenegger film, or even your closest pal, suggests oth erwise, he stresses that how you handle conflict should ultimately reflect your deeply held personal beliefs. Winning a fight depends more on how you define winning than on how you define fighting. Someone disagrees with you, Webster-Doyle says, that’s their problem. Hey, I got no problem with that. (Z)

Fa th e r Fig u re C o n tin u e d from p ag e 1 7 though — male or female — has the luxury o f putting kids first and keeping their job. Delia is fortunate to be in what he calls a “family-friendly” workplace. Still, that doesn’t make for any more hours in the day. “There are times when it gets tough,” he concedes, “as any parent will tell you.” Any parent also knows that along with the joy o f being with kids comes frustration at the lack o f time for yourself. “Other single parents tell me if you don’t treat yourself to some adult stimulation and conversa tion you don’t have anything to give your family,” says Delia. “But if you want to do some thing and get a babysitter... guilt plays a big role in all this.” Then again, he admits with a laugh, when the girls go to bed at 8:30, he finds himself saying, “ Now what do I do?” Lots o f folks have been happy to suggest what he

should do. Free advice comes from all quarters, Delia acknowledges — including from some who assume a man doesn’t know how to nurture. But Delia’s found that, with some emotional healing, he’s ready for less advice and more privacy. “People mean well, but I’m kind o f getting tired o f peo ple offering help,” he admits. “I finally closed up the window and try to do things on my own. It’s a natural evolution.” When it comes to family, however, the “window” stays open. Delia and Sue both came from close-knit clans, who have offered plenty o f moral support this year in his transition to sin gle-parenting, a new job and a new state. Delia’s parents, in Chester, Vermont, are nearest; Nicole and Jennifer see them about every three months, he says. His own three siblings are in Boston and Washington, D .C . Sue’s family is in Michigan — she had five sib lings, and Delia’s determined his girls will grow up close to

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By John Bell y naked thighs were starting to quiver. Sixteen pairs o f eyes stared from all sides at my bare body, rigid atop a table in a Hardy Boys-bookcover stance: a semi-squat with arms extend ed sideways and head thrust forward. I looked like a porno graphic mime pretending to be a linebacker. It all started with a classi fied ad: “Figure model. Good pay, flexible hours.” Stand around in my birthday suit for money? I could do that. I applied for the job and got it. My first day, I entered Williams Hall, a Victorian red brick behemoth encasing the University o f Vermont’s art department, and shuffled up the stairs to a classroom. A dis robing area was in the corner. You’re posing in the b u ff fo r strangers, but you get privacy while undressing.? I thought. What’s the point? A lone graffito read: “W E ARE ALL N A K E D .” Probably a message o f solidarity from a previous model. As students drifted in, I sat in my towel, pleased to see sev eral good-looking girls. I’d expected art students to look something like the carnival rejects who hang out in front o f the mall: pierced everything and green hair. Instead, nearly all o f them looked straight from the J. Crew catalog. The eight girls and seven guys sat at drawing desks encircling a large, low, square table. The professor entered and, after we’d met, ascended her

five one-minute poses. John, do whatever you want.” I pulled o ff my towel, laid it flat on the table, and stepped up. I saw out the corner o f my eye that I was facing several girls, including the whiny blonde. I saw her exchange looks with the girl next to her, but I couldn’t see their expressions. I’d like to think they implied, “Hey, this is nice!” But they could have meant, “Eww! I’m gonna puke!” Or maybe, “Poor guy. I hope I don’t laugh out loud.” It’s probably better I don’t know. I’m really not insecure about my body, though last winter, working at a ski lodge, I got a little dumpy. Okay, that’s an understatement. Let’s just say that, had I met Fred Tuttle, he might have tried to milk me. Since then, though, a regi men o f exercise and fiber has whittled my Clintonian girth down to a more svelte profile, and I don’t mind showing off the results. On the other hand, like every guy, I’m a tad demure when it comes to my one ungrowable “muscle.” I’ve always assumed it’s an accept able size and shape, but would these babes think so? After the five one-minute poses, I did 15-minute and 20 minute sitting poses. Each time, I found a knot in the wood o f a vacant chair or a mark on the wall and tried to stare it down. I avoided eye contact with anyone, lest I cease to be a generic representa tive o f the human form and become, for an uncomfortable instant, just a nekkid guy that persons staring at. I could see the students look up at me as they scribbled /^away with their charcoal. I have

Stand around in my birthday suit for money? I could do that. I applied for the job and got it.

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to admit it was an ego trip. I’ve always enjoyed being the center o f attention, and now I was, quite literally, just that. To pass the time, I thought o f mundane things: How late is the bank open? What time does the Rutland bus leave on Mondays? I wonder if I have any messages. My foot started going to sleep. Then my hand. I tried subtly to shift my weight. Just in time, there was a break between poses, allowing my numb limbs to rcsanguinate. To my relie f ] s lig h t i*‘

lectern to rattle o ff the first-ofclass litany. The semester had just started. “What did you expect to do in this class?” she asked. “What do you want to draw?” An attractive young blonde raised her hand. “I thought we were going to start with por traits and then go on to full-fig ure drawing,” she said. She hadn’t prepared to stare at a naked man today. Too bad. op swim, bab>

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crouching-to-wrestle-rabid-bear stance. “That’s it!” she cried. “Class, this is the pose. You have six minutes.” After a few minutes had crawled by, the professor asked, “John, how ya doing?” “Great,” I said. I could take the pain — bring it on! “Class, one more minute.” “I can go longer if you need it,” I said heroically. “ Longer” meant about a minute more, but testosterone had declared martial law in my nerve centers. She stopped me at six minutes, and I was grateful. For the next pose, I sat in a chair — towel under me, as always — for a head-only por trait. This should have been easier, but after 20 minutes my hands folded in my lap started going to sleep. After the last pose, the stu dents walked around the circle o f desks, looking at each other’s work, with me still at the center table, feeling like a rabbit sur rounded by a pack o f hungry wolves. I was really curious to see how they’d drawn me. But I

got the feeling I wasn’t even supposed to look at .their work. I was supposed to be a still, silent, opinionless symbol, not a peeping Ebert. Finally the professor asked the students to hold up for examination the drawings they thought showed particular skill. I looked eagerly as the first white rectangle was hoisted in the air and flipped around. It was odd to see myself rendered in black lines by a stranger, but somehow flatter ing, too. While some drawing showed real talent, with an almost 3-D effect, a few made my head too big or looked clunky and primitive. Yet most made me better-looking than I really am. The best part? As I looked at each drawing, I invariably noticed one thing missing. Fingers? Ears? Nostrils? Nah. It was an omission that made me smile — with relief. No one had actually drawn m y.. .you know. ®

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* which I had feared would be the ultimate humiliation. In fact, I was experiencing the inverse — so euphemistically described on “Seinfeld” as “shrinkage.” This was not much better. C ant wait to see how they draw that, I thought, imagining my dangling modifier recorded in charcoal: “Is that his navel?” “No, that’s supposed to be his...you know.” The professor walked around, coaching the artists. “Remember, folks, no one has a round head, nor a square head, either. Look at his face. There are details you’ll only catch if you look closely.” She walked up to the side o f my head and inspected it as I continued my staring contest with a push-pin. After a five-minute break, she said, “John, let’s have you do something more active. Act like you’re throwing some thing.” I did my best John Elway. “Hmm. Very...Greek,” she said. “Now, pose like you’re really in action.” I dropped to my caveman-

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SEVEN DAYS

page 41

B y Pa u la R o u tly •„-v

he poet Lola Rodriguez def Tio wasn’t thinking dance steps when she observed “Cuba and Puerto Rico are two wings o f one bird” — or de un pajaro las dos alas. She was referring to the yoke o f Spanish colonial rule, which was fitted snugly over both , Caribbean countries. Her poems, like those o f her col league, Cuban poet Jos£ Marti, were impassioned odes to inde pendence. Today, neighboring islands Cuba and Puerto Rico are on opposite ends o f the political spectrum. But the organizers o f Dos Alas/Two Wings — a pro gram that brings dancers and musicians from both countries together on the same stage — don’t want to get into that. They focus on the bird metaphor to draw attention to what the two islands do share: a cultural heritage that can be traced straight back to the Gold Coast o f Africa. Like jazz, tap and blues, which developed independendy in response to similar stimuli, rumba and bomba are Caribbean-flavored forms o f oppression expression. “They share similar histories, they share a language, and they share a world view beyond a drum rhythm and a dance step,” says Roberta Singer, the ethnomusicologist who put the tour together. “In terms o f music and movement, both o f these traditions are informed by, and guided by, a larger and West and Central African aesthetic.” Slave trade was brisk in the

18th-century Caribbean, with indentured Africans coming to the islands primarily from Nigeria, Dahomey, Ghana and Congo. Although many more slaves ended up working on plantations in Cuba than Puerto Rico, according to Singer, their numbers never grew large enough on either island to challenge the prevail ing Spanish culture. Instead, they incorporated the Iberian influences into their own, to forge a fresh, Afro-Caribbean sensibility in the New World. You can see from the first steps, the Puerto Rican bomba is a cultural hybrid. Less obvi ous are the cultural preservation efforts o f the family onstage. The Cepedas clan kept the dance alive through decades o f decline in its popularity. It’s been making a comeback,

though, since the family patri arch was recognized by the National Endowment for the Arts for insuring “that a para mount expression o f the AfroPuerto Rican experience will be carried into the future.” The number o f bomba schools on the island has increased from one to five. The drums never stop throughout these kinetic show downs, as a caller sings out short, chant-like lyrics that get parroted back by the chorus. The man and woman take turns in the spotlight, exploring their own movement vocabular ies within the confines o f colo nial clothing and shoes. He comes out like a human jack hammer, shaking all over like a man possessed, then breaks into a series o f jerky, mechanized movements that bring modern

The Matanzas music is also break dancers to mind. ^ ; • The woman is more subtle, ^ more complicated, combining > bata and conga drums with the in part because her flouncy dress does not allow for a whole shake and ratde o f three hand lot o f bending over. It does lend held chekeres. But to the itself to skirt-swirling, though, untrained eye, there are more similarities than differences reminiscent o f flamenco dance. And there is an irony in those between the two wings o f this twirling petticoats, as Singer island bird: After a night o f bomba and rumba, you are less points out. “The truth is, Spain likely to remember the Yoruba was ruled by North Africa for nine centuries,” she says, noting references than a flurry o f shim many o f the moves considered mying shoulders and bobbing strictly Spanish derived from butts. An island-hopping finale seals the Afro-Cuban impres Moorish sources. The rumba dances from the sion. Grupo Afro Cuba de Matanzas It should also be said that neither Los Hermanos nor are more earthy, and athletic, Grupo Afro-Cuba are polished than those o f their Puerto professional dance troupes — Rican counterparts — although “with an e,’ at the end,” as neither troupe takes a particu larly showy approach to the Singer puts it. But as an ethnomusicologist, she was more material they present. The male dancers are impressive, however, interested in finding authentic especially when they come out examples o f living traditions, as opposed to the “ballet folkloriin grass skirts and red bandanas co thing,” which she considers wielding machetes. The cane “watered down” and “shallow.” cutting motions are an essential “If people come with an part o f the choreography in the sacred piece entitled “Ogun.” open mind and an open heart,” Singer suggests, “they will pick up on the genuine love the folks up onstage have for what they are doing.” In other words, the best way to prepare for a ride on this rare bird comes directly from the airline indus try: Sit back, relax and enjoy the flight. (?)

After a night of bomba and rumba, you are less likely to remember the Yoruba references than a flurry of shimmying shoulders and bobbing butts.

The artists o f Dos Alas/Two Wings will lead a dance and per cussion class, “Rumba. .. Bomba. .. Rumbombazo!>’ November 3, 7 p.m ., at the College Street Congregational Church in Burlington. For regis tration, call 652-4500.

“ Dos Alas/Two Wings,” Cuba’s Grupo AfroCuba de Matanzas and Puerto Rico’s Los Hermanos Cepeda. Flynn Theatre, Burlington, November 4, 7:30 p.m.

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SEVEN DAYS

October 28,1998

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Dear Tom and Ray, I have a 1992 Saturn with 57,000 miles on it. I had the "low engine coolant" light come on frequently and suspected a leak in the cooling system. When I took the car to the Saturn deal ership, they said that the cylinder head had a crack, and the coolant was leak ing inside the engine. The estimated cost o f a new cylinder head is about $2000. The cost o f repair seems a bit too high. The way I see it, even i f I have to put in $5 worth o f coolant every week, I can do thatfo r the next 400 weeks (about eight years) fo r the same price as a new

lot worse. And usually fast. TO M : And if you do screw up and let it run out o f coolant and overheat, you could ruin the entire engine. And then you'll be looking at an even big ger bill. So if you plan to keep this car for awhile, you really should fix it. But here's an alternative to having the work done at your dealer. An inddpendent shop will probably be will ing to buy a used cylinder head for you from a junkyard engine. RAY: It'll cost a few hundred dollars to buy it and a few hundred more to have it installed. So for about a grand, you can take care of that cracked head once and for all. TO M : If only I could fix my brother's cracked head that easily!

cylinder head Would I be better o ff ju st keeping an eye on the coolant level or forking over $2000 to the dealer to replace the cylinder head? — Dinesh RAY: Neither, Dinesh. Unfortunately, your $5-a-week theory doesn't really hold water (ha ha) here, because leaks like this almost always get worse. A

D ear Tom and Ray, In a brutal winter/road salt state like Minnesota, is it betterfo r the car to have a heated garage or an uJlheated garage? Obviously, it is betterfo r the driver to have a heated garage. But it seems like a car might rustfaster in a heated garage because the snow!salt would melt every night rather than ju st stayingfrozen. However, fo r the engine,

AU TO M O TIV E AUTOMOTIVE CONSULTING IS HERE! Automotive technician w/ an

it seems like the heated garage might be betterfor avoiding the cruel molasses like oil start-ups. What do you think? — Pat

RAY: And since the coolant is warm, you get heat quickly, too, which we know is all you really care about, Pat! TO M : And all you should really care about. In fact, if the block heater is too much trouble for you, I'd just park the car in a heated garage and forget about the rust. I think your comfort and happiness is much more important than how long the car lasts. RAY: Right. After all, it's only a car, right? You can always get another car. But if you break your teeth from chat tering on the way to work, you'll be hard-pressed to replace them.

TO M : Your analysis is absolutely right on the money, Pat. Ideally, you want the body of the car outside in the cold where the chemical reaction (i.e., rust ing process) is slowed substantially. And you want the engine in the heat ed garage where the oil will almost instandy be at operating temperature. RAY: So the answer is simple. Park the car with its nose only in the garage! Just pull up untHl the wind shield is lined up with the garage door, and bring that baby down! TO M : Actually, there's a more elegant way to accomplish the same thing. You can get an engine block heater. An engine block heater plugs into an electrical oudet at night. And when the timer turns it on at 4 or 5 a.m., it warms up the engine block. That way, when you go out to start the car and it's 2 degrees out, the coolant and oil are already warm and the engine does n't suffer through an elongated warm up period.

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LEONARDO’S PIZZA SEEKING part-tim e drivers w/ good dri ving records. Also, inside staff including phone persons & cooks. Apply at 8 3 Pearl St., Burlington. Ask for Dave.

If I w o u ld n ’t lo o k w h e n it w a s s c re a m in ’, w h a t m akes it th in k I’ m g o n n a lo o k n o w ?

the story o f a slave whose job is “to wait on Massa and hand him de plate/Pass down de bottle when he git dry/And bresh away de blue-tail fly.” Among the things he’s supposed to bresh away de blue-tail fly from is Massa’s pony, using a hickory broom. One day when the flies are especially thick, one gets through and bites...well, either Massa or the pony, you can’t quite tell. Anyway, the pony bolts, Massa pitches into the ditch and dies, and the coro ner’s jury blames the blue-tail fly. “Jim [my] crack corn, I don’t care/Ole Massa gone away.”

Dear Cecil, Who is Jimmy, and why does he crack com? — Nruggierbc, via AOL I don’t care! Sorry, couldn’t resist. As you know from this columns previous attempts, song interpretation is not a science, and the passage of time hasn’t made things any easier. A hundred years from now God knows what they’ll make of “Stairway to Heaven.” “Jimmy Crack Corn” (originally “Jim Crack Corn”) tells

Scratch around and you’ll find some interesting takes on this song. When we consulted Tom Miller, Straight Dope curator of music, he told us about an interpretation he’d heard from Charlie Maddox, a musician in Shenandoah, Virginia. Maddox said “crack corn” came from the old English term “crack,” meaning gossip, and that “cracking corn” was a traditional Shenandoah expres sion for “sitting around chitchatting.” Maddox claimed “Jimmy Crack Corn” was an abolitionist song, and that “blue-tail fly” referred to federal troops in their blue uni forms overthrowing the slave owners. A conspicuous defect of this theory is that “Jimmy Crack Corn,” published in 1846, is attributed to an outfit called the Virginia Minstrels. The Virginia Minstrels helped originate the blackface minstrel show, not one of your prime vehicles for abolitionist sentiment. The author of the song, though not definitely known, was probably a Virginia Minstrel named Daniel Emmett, a popular song writer and musician whose best-known composition was the southern anthem “Dixie” (1859). Like his contempo rary Stephen Foster, Emmett was a northerner who wrote sentimental songs about the south in black dialect. So don’t go looking for any deep social message. Still, who is Jimmy and why did he crack corn? Maybe it’s about gossip, like the man said. But an equally plausible theory I’ve heard is that “cracking corn” means cracking

open a jug o f corn liquor. Try it next time your Massa goes away, and after a half-dozen verses you won’t care, either. Q U E S T IO N S W E’RE ST IL L T H IN K IN G A B O U T The most im portant thing a man can do fo r his fellow man is to travel north o f the A rctic Circle a n d evacuate in a bucket o f turpentine. True? — JPG X , via A O L

I f Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? I got all myfriends for free! Some I didn’t want. Please answer this riddling nightmare that haunts me so. — J erry> via the Internet They say withfaith and hard workyour dream will come true. Last night mine did: I got to have a conversation with Adam Durtiz, a poet I truly respect. My dream came true, it’s over, now what? — Zach Braiker, via AOL PS: I don’t like Disneyland. I heard thatyou can tell an awful lot about a person by what they put into their burrito and how they eat it. Is this true? I ’m going on a first date with this gorgeous woman, and I thought it would be great if, instead ofspending a lot o f time talking about ourselves to get to know each other, I couldjust order her a burrito for dinner, then sit back and watch. What dp you think? — Shorty, via the Internet Cecil, do you like it better in Chicago than you do in the summertime? — HTS1957, via AOL You’re not from here, don’t you? (7) — CECIL ADAMS

Is there something you need to get straight? Cecil Adams can deliver the Straight Dope on any topic. Write Cecil Adams at the Chicago Reader, 11 E. Illinois, Chicago, !L 6 0 6 1 1 , or e-mail him at cecil@chireader.com.

October 2 8 , 19S 8 v ,

page

684

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/3P*-

page 46

SEVEN DAYS"

October 28 f4098

THE TOWN C0 MMEM0RATEP THEM BY ERECTING A NEW CLOCK.

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optOber 28,1998

SEVEN DAYS

page 47

Oct 29-Nov 4

c l

" jp

j k

ARIES (Mar. 21-Apr. 19): I suggest that this Halloween you cos tume yourself as a phoenix — you know, the scarlet, heron-like bird which (according to myth) regularly burned itself in a purifying fire and rose reborn from the ashes. This is, after all, the resurrectional phase o f your astrological cycle, Aries. You have an intuitive sense o f what parts o f your life need to die in order for you to be reborn as a smarter, stronger version o f yourself. (P.S. If you’re a Christian, even a lapsed one, you might prefer to masquerade as your religions equivalent o f the phoenix — Jesus Christ.)

TAURUS

(Apr. 20-M ay 20): The highest number o f kisses ever exchanged in a single film was 127 in Don Ju an (1926). John Barrymore was the lucky pecker, dividing his lip locks between M ary Astor and Estelle Taylor. My personal record for a sin gle week occurred during my very temporary group marriage on a Vermont commune back in the ’70s. I can’t tell you the exact am ount o f osculations I amassed at that time, but it must have been close to a thou sand. I bring this up now, Taurus, because I believe you’re ripe to break your personal record. W hy not dream up a Halloween costume that’ll incite epic opportunities to swap spit?

GEMINI

(M ay 21-June 20): You’d be wise to disguise yourself as your worst fear this Halloween. Imagine the divine relaxation that’ll well up in you as you mock the queasy apprehension you usually take so damn seriously. T hink o f how much fun you’ll have as you reclaim the power you’ve allowed your buga boo to steal from you.. And what exactly should your costume be? D on’t pick an easy nightmare like a terrorist with a suitcase nuke or a monster spawned by a toxic waste dum p or a puritanical McCarthyite on a sexual witch hunt. M ake it intensely personal.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): “The higher a woman’s IQ ,” quoth scholar Lucius Cervantes, “the more she is likely to be masculine in out look. The higher a man’s IQ, the more likely he is to be feminine in oudook.” As a macho hetero dude who’s grown smarter as I’ve learned to think like a female, I completely agree with Cervantes. And you? I happen to believe, my fellow Cancerian, that the coming weeks are a perfect moment to boost your own intelligence with the help o f some gender-bending. T hat’s why I’m exhorting you to cross-dress this Halloween. More than that, though, try on a kind o f inner costume: See the world as if you had the brain o f the opposite sex.

LEO

(July 23-Aug. 22): “Dear Dr. Brezsny: "Whenever I have washed my underpants in the past four weeks, every single pair has ended up insideout. Today, just for an experiment, I turned them all inside-out before I put them in the washing machine, but when they were done they were all still inside-out. Could this have something to do with my astrology? Sincerely, Lopsided Leo.” Dear Lopsided: Yes. Lately the stars have been dosing you with excessive am ounts o f reverse psychology and flippy-floppy teases. Luckily, Halloween offers you a window o f opportunity to appease the tricky gods who’ve been messing with you. My suggestion: Create a costume which’ll allow you to wear your unmentionables inside-out and on the outside o f your clothes.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Our goal this Halloween should be to perm anendy burn away 20 percent o f your inhibitions. That would be a great way to take advantage o f the

liberating energies the cosmos is now making available. Any suggestions as to how we can accomplish this? Remember, we don’t want you to be deliriously unrestrained for a night or two and then revert to your previous levels o f self-censorship. The relaxed expansiveness has got to last. How about this: Wear a costume that’s only twice as wild as you normally are, not 10 times as wild.

LIBRA

(Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Your Halloween assignment, Libra, should you choose to accept it, is to have the funniest sex you’ve ever enjoyed. To get you in the mood to dream up your own chuckle-fuck rituals, I’ll make a suggestion. Rent Santa Claus and Easter Bunny costumes for you and your partner, and buy a giant bouquet o f helium balloons. Back at home, create a luxurious Samhain altar, complete with pomegranates, chrysanthemums, genital-shaped can dles, wine in a silver goblet, or any sensually sacred objects that jiggle your imagination. "While clothed in your costumes and rubbing up against each other in a slow-motion seduction dance, inhale doses o f heli um from the balloons as you read aloud to each other from John Gray’s book Men Are From M ars, Women Are from Venus.

SCORPIO

(Oct. 23-Nov. 21): “I am free o f prejudices,” W C . Fields used to say. “I hate everyone equally.” G od forbid that you should ever make those your words to live by, Scorpio — with the exception o f this Halloween, that is. T hat’s right. I’m urging you to dress up as a mis anthrope or villain this masquerade season. My hope is that i f you pre tend to be a mean and hateful crea ture, you’ll utterly purge any ferment ing venom from your system for weeks to come. So who’ll be your role

model? Joseph Stalin? Al Capone? The Grand Inquisitor? Cruella de Vil? Xenia Onatopp from the movie Goldeneye? Medusa? Kenneth Starr?

SAGITTARIUS

(Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Have you communed with your dead friends and relatives lately? They have some catalytic insights about what your life looks like from the other side o f the veil. And now that the veil is thin, it’s a perfect time to make contact. If I were you, Sagittarius, I’d stage a seance this Halloween, or incubate a dream in which you meet with those dear departed spirits. Now I don’t mean to imply that everything they’ll have to say is G od ’s (or Science’s) truth. But the dreamy stories they’ll plant in your imagination should bring you closer to the outrageous truth than the mere facts ever could.

CAPRICORN

(Dec. 22Jan. 19): “Whether I shall turn out to be the hero o f my own life, or whether that station will be held by anybody else, these pages must show.” So begins Charles Dickens’ novel D avid Copperfield. I urge you to write that same overture at the head o f a new chapter in your own journal, Capricorn. Below it, list five vows which, if ultimately carried out, will prove that you are the hero o f your own life. Then choose one o f those five to focus all your will power on during the next few weeks. Finally, create a costume for yourself this Halloween which perfectly embodies the spirit you’ll need to pull o ff that first vow.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): In old Europe, every king and queen wore a crown. Often com posed o f jewels set in a band o f gold, it was a sign o f the highest earthly power. Egypt’s pharoahs, who were

onsidered a blend o f human d god, wore either a white ne bearing a model o f a serent, or else a cap with one Straight and one spiral stalk. Ancient Greece honored both fierce warriors and ingenious poets with fancy wreaths. In Buddhism, the crown symbolizes the elevation o f spirit over body. N ow that you’ve heard a brief history o f exalted headgear, Aquarius, I hope you’ll be inspired to acquire and wear your own. You are, after all, in the most commanding phase o f your astrologi cal cycle. And the Halloween season gives you a perfect excuse to wear a crown all the time.

PISCES

(Feb. 19-Mar. 20): Play along with me and assume that the doctrine o f reincarnation is cor rect. Imagine that you’ve been on earth many times before. Now fanta size about what you’d like to be when you incarnate next time around, say in T h e Nigerian Republic o f Shell Oil in 2010 or in New New York City in 2130 or in the lunar mall-fiefdom o f Billgatesville in 2280. Visualize the body and brain you’d like to have then, the fascinating problems you’ll be given to solve, the soulmates who’ll torment and inspire you. (And if you can’t bring yourself to believe in reincarnation, then conjure up a vision o f the person you’ll be 10 years from today.) Spend some time medi tating on this, Pisces, and then design a Halloween costume that’ll let you portray your future self. ® You can ca ll Rob Broamny, day or night for your

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84 Hackneyed 85 Oklahoma city 87 Extend across 88 Art medium 89 Short snooze 92 Composer Carl 94 "Silas Mamer" and “Oliver Twist" 97 Hardly hard bodied 98 Fate 102 JFK abbr. 104 Rampur royalty 105 Neighbor of Tenn. 108 Military command 107 ignorance is b liss..." 109 Full of froth 111 Blind part 112 Eye drop? 114 Concerning 115 Belfry sound 117 North Carolina campus 118 Eastern European 119 Discern 121 Medical grp. 1 2 3 — Tm Tin 124 Like-minded 125 — Cruces, N.M . 126 Teachers' org.

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to respond to a personal ad call l-000-JJ0-7JL2J^ We’re open 24 hours a day! $ 1.99 a minute, must be 18 or older. CUTE, FUNNY. HONEST, SMART, SELF-

NETTLE TEA DRINKING VEGGIE who

aware, playful, artistic, health-con scious, progressive, politically activeSF, 34, NS, ISO SM with similar qualities, to goof off w/ and to share ideas & adventures. 2166_____________________

blares Madonna w / the top down ISO responsible, motivated Wesley w / pas sion for living. Animal lovers a +! Me: SWF, 24. You: near there. 2119_______

NEED MUSICIANS TO COMPLETE SONGS

fit, pretty, lively and adorable; welleducated, creative professional; selfconfident and secure SWF, NS, who loves to garden, read, dance, attend cultural events, travel and spend time with friends, seeks good-looking, welleducated, stable, sensitive man with a great sense of humor, who likes his work and his play. 2093______________

& life. Attractive SWF, s’s”, green/dark auburn hair, smoker, mother of two. You: tall, fit, good-looking. 2123_______

STATUESQUE, IRREVERENT OPTIMIST seeks witty, intelligent, warm profes sional man, 35-45, who loves life, the arts, the ocean...and doesn’t mind the occasional chick flick. 2128____________

ANYBODY OUT THERE LOVE JAZZ?

S ir,al> ■I.,!-:» •IK < !•.I

_ or Call ^ 1-800-710-8727 to charge clirectty to your credit card

Fiercely independent SWPF, 61, seeks M companion who likes to get out, to hear the great music available in our area. Jazz tops my list of favorites. Other interests are walking, talking, singing, papermaking, movies, theater, friends & family. 2186_________

SWF. FULL-FIGURED, SEEKING FRIENDship. Travel, investments, photography, art, museums, jewelry, weekends, books/good writing, busy, financially/ emotionally secure. 2184______________

I’M READY FOR A HEALTHY, FUN. AND honest relationship with an emotionally sound professional, late 20S-early 40s, who’s good-looking, fit & loves nature. I can offer the same, and more. I’m 35. 2188_________________________________

A BOY, A GIRL, AN OPEN GRAVE...

w om an A&rfdnq m m JACK OF ALL TRADES, MASTER OF SOME wanted by this petite, fit, auburn haired beauty-in-search-of-a-beast. Prefer 40-45, fit, active. 2191__________

CREATIVE, PASSIONATE, WORDY, urban-minded, kind-hearted, humorous, attractive SWF. 28, seeks smart, sweet, sexy S/DM, 25 -35 , for inspired verbal exchange with possibilities for romance. Enough adjectives for you?

2125_________________________ I AM A FAIR AND LOVELY, TRUE UBRA who lives with balance and harmony in life. I am kind, loving and strong. Would like to meet friendly males with similar qualities, 46- 56 . Many interests. Values and family important. I'm a sweet heart, don’t miss out. 2211______

LONG-LEGGED AND LONELY, SWF, 38 , looking to make new friends, possibly more. Out going, active and love to laugh. Looking for men who are honest and don’t play games. 2212___________

A MEETING OF THE MIND, HEART & SOUL with compatible S/DM, NS, 45 -

60, is sought by holistic, fit, petite, NS vegetarian F with poetic expression and natural appeal. 2215______________

Morticia seeks Gomez for an unwhole some relationship. I have a Wednesday. No Pugsleys, Festers or Lurches need apply. 2189___________________________ 40 -SOMETHING, PETITE, BLUE-EYED, blonde, a true romantic, emotionally & financially secure, kind, caring, honest & loving. Enjoys a variety of interests. Life’s too short to spend it alone. 2147

DANCE WITH MEI SWPF, writer, slim, funny, musical, adventurous, loves jazz, yoga, outdoors, more. ISO fiscally/ physically fit, funny SWPM, 40S-50S, NS, with well-stocked mind, generous heart. 2156___________________________

LEADING THE GOOD LIFE. Blonde, 42, fit and funny. Your masculinity isn’t threatened if I reglaze the windows (you grill the steak). Deeply respectful, irreligious left-field inhabitant; awaiting your fly ball. 2159____________________ LETS MAKE THE ROCKIES CRUMBLE & Gibralter tumble. SBF seeks submissive SWM &/or crossdresser for intimate journeys which cross peaks of mutual desire & the heights of pleasure. 2150

WORKING WEEKENDS MEANS HAVING the trails to myself mid-week. Restaurants, theatres and roads are quiet, too. We still have time to hike, paddle, bike and blade before we get our winter toys out. DWF, 40, NS, seeks mid-week playmate, 30-50. 2164

QUICK MIND. CARING HEART. Bright, witty, fit female, 43, loves outdoors, music and ideas, but misses sharing life’s pleasures with an intelligent man who can think, feel and laugh. 2130 ME: BROWN-EYED, LONG-LEGGED, pas sionate, considerate, playful, naughty, attending, adventurous. You: generous lamb, w olfs attire, bashful, worldly gentleman. We: quiet companionship, mutual wildness, philosophy, puns, passports. 2131____________________ __

rrs A HOEDOWN. 29 YO,

petite brunette, NS, ND, fiddle player, (Burl, area), does aerobics, avid reader on spirituality, ISO M musician for jamming, friends, maybe more. 2133______

ADVENTUROUS, SPONTANEOUS, FUNloving SWPF, 25, seeks SM for cycling adventures, snowboarding, good times. Also into music (all types), writing. ISO friendship, honesty, possibilities. 2136

SHARE MY LOVE OF NATURAL BEAUTY, fine craftsmanship, animals, art, guitar music, kayaking, biking, horseback rid ing. Earthy, well-travelled, educated. I can look like a million, but prefer back roads & thrift shops. ISO kind, wise, open-hearted, educated, available, mid dle-aged DWM who’d enjoy the company of an artist. 2144__________________

POLITICAL, BUT NOT PC, HIGH VOLT AGE SPF, 49, NS, light drinker, enjoys

ISO MOONSTRUCK D/SM W / OLD SOUL & young heart, 40- 55, (over)educated, creative, mature, centered, appreciative of fireplace as well as trail. Huntress is DWPF, 44, 5’ 3”, slender, high-energy, loves mountains, oceans, music, books, sports, travel, art, food (cook/ dine), movies, (my) kids, you? 2062

SINGLE, 32 , ARTSY BUSINESS OWNER, down-to-earth, ISO somewhat gor geous, tall, well-built, NS hunk who is educated, has his sh*t together, ski, rock, must like dogs. 2068___________

when out walking,

Dear Lola, I knew you're proba bly sick to death c$ the Monica story, and sc am I. But the guys at the cfj^ice won’t get efifi the topic, and there’s one particular point of; contention I’d like you to help us clear up. Is it sick of her to have saved the semenstained dress? They say yes, I say no. We’ve agreed to ab id e by you r

please pick up after your dog

decision.

HONEST, KIND, ATTRACTIVE, PETITE, educated, NS SWPF, 41, seeks fun, edu cated, kind-hearted man, 34-47 . Good conversation, low-key sports, communi ty events, helping each other grow together & individually. Possible LTR. 2070_________________________________

WARM-HEARTED & WHIMSICAL DWF,

43, eclectic, intelligent, easily amused, seeks romance with creative, quirky, affectionate NS M, under 50 (trades man or mad scientist?). Kids and/or animals a plus. 2076

AS WINTER APPROACHES. I LOOK FOR you. SF, 50,looking to share life’s sim ple pleasures & some of the complica tions of relationships. Be handsome, brilliant, stable, willing to travel. 2080

-Wcndcrins in Winooski

SWF, 4 3 . PASSIONATE ABOUT NATURE (sailing, skiing, hiking) seeking LTR. I’m educated, caring, and spirited with a good sense o f humor. Call if you share my love of laughter, eclectic musical tastes (jazz, classical, rock) and liberal politics. 2108_________________________

SWF, 28 , MOTHER OF TWO BOYS ISO SWM, 25- 35, who enjoys country music, dinner, movies and just having a little fun every now and then. 2112

DELIGHTFUL NATIVE VERMONTER, SW,

45, currently residing south of Philly, ISO financially/emotionally secure WPM, 50+, for long-distance LTR. Enjoy outdoor activities, witty conversation, romantic evenings and animals. 2104

SOULFUL, INTREPID MUSE WHO LIVES in her body and knows what she means, seeks same in large, wise, sol vent adventurer who could sleep on the other side o f my dog and not take it personally. 2216____________________

M(mmm..,) SNOWBOARDER, HELP MEI SWF, 20, slim, attractive, crazy hairdo, seeks you, 19-30, that knows how to treat a woman, go snowboarding and teach me how to master my board. 2171._________________________________

DWF, 4 7 , ISO SMALL HOMESTEAD W / nice land, healthy outdoors man, sheep, dogs, cats. Educated eccentrics welcome, NS/ND. Do you snowshoe, XC-ski, bike, walk, canoe, quilt, garden, cook? 2174___________________________

OK, SO I WAS A LATE BLOOMER...BUT I get it now. If you’re a guy who wants to help my blooming flower evolve, do buzz me. I’m a SWF, 33. 2175__________

INTELLIGENT, PRETTY SWPF, 31 , petite, Ctrl. VT. Interested in intellectual/cultural pursuits and cooking. Fit, but not athletic. ISO SWPM, 30-40, NS/ND, emotionally & financially stable, con siderate, with sense of direction in life and similar interests for friendship, possible LTR. 2180

You are cordially invited to the

C reative B la ck Tie Singles P a rty at Ughemi F r id a y , D e c e m b e r 4 , 8 p .m .

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A public service announcement from SEVEN DAYS:

hiking, writing, cats, folk music in Ctrl. VT. Values honesty, humor, spirituality, hard work. ISO SM minus mach/insecurity. He’s passionate about life, love, loyalty. Likes cats. Friendship, possible LTR. 2140____________________________

>7 rt*

FR E E !

SEE PAGE 12 FOR DETAILS

Dear Wondering, I see it this way. The girl was in love. The girl was obsessed with bringing her main man to climax. She worked long and hard to make it happen. And the object op her obsession was the leader o t h e free world. Plus, we’re not talking skid-marked drawers, here. To me, a little semen doesn’t seem so icky. Remember when Tom Jones used to sing "What’s New, Pussycat? ” and those dowdy British matrons would hand him their hankies sc he could wipe his sweaty brew? J/ou know those sweatstained hankies didn't wind up in the wash. Love.

J jo L a Phone b lo ck ed from d ia lin g 9 0 0 n u m b ers? Don't w ant a c h a r g e on y o u r phone b i l l ?

R espond T o P ersonals U sing Y

our

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Call 1-800-710-8727 $ 1 .9 9 /m ln . m u s t b e 18+

October

28, 1998

SEVEN DAYS

page 49

to respond to a personal ad call l-QOO-370-7127 We’re open 24 hours a day! $1.99 a minute, must be 18 or older. “DOG-CENTERED- WOMAN SOUGHT-

L m n AQokinq w om en UNBEARABLE LIGHTNESS OF BEING. SWPM, 36, 5 ’ 11”, 185 lbs., tall, dark, handsome, likes exercise, outdoors, adventure. Recently separated from LTR, no kids. ISO attractive SPF, 36 +/-, shares the above 81 wants to swing-, slow-dance away cares together. She believes life’s best things are mostly free. 2193

YOU: YOUNGER, INTELLIGENT, NS W /

who isn’t afraid of a straight-forward guy like me. Me: SWM, 63, classically educated, enjoys music, movies and reading. If you share similar interests, and appreciate a good conversational ist, you are the friend 1 need! 2163

intelligent, wise, attractive, proportion ate, sensual, confident, centered, con sistent, kind, warm & thoughtful; understands (and speaks) fluent K9; seeks a balanced life (and partner). LTR possible. 2110___________________

ATTRACTIVE 81 HUMOROUS DWM, 4 7 ,

SWM, 21 , ATTRACTIVE, FUNNY, LIKES

6’i ”, NS, professional, active—

2132

sports and movies ISO SWF who’s kinky, NS, disease free and wears seductive clothes such as spandex, leather, fishnets, garter belts for romance. Photo/letter. 2113__________

CONCERTS, “SOUTH PARK," RAIN,

YOU’RE THE NEEDLE, I’M THE THREAD,

Rollerblade, hike, dance, X-C ski, dine, concerts— ISO D’/SF with similar inter ests for fun and possible LTR. Kids OK.

2198

cloves, sarcasm, Deftones, sunsets, thunderstorms, biking, movies, pasts, Guiness, swimming, nymphomania, piercings, “Simpsons,” snowboarding, atheism, hiking, Corona, Halloween, Korn, tequila, skinny dipping. Don’t you agree? Call. 2134

NICE GUYS FINISHING LAST HAS COME

“SEACHING" GOOD-LOOKING, HEALTHY,

to an end. We’re taking over. Looking for a great lady to help this SWM, 25, start the revolution. Let’s start a great cause. 2199

classy, focused and committed. Enjoys: workouts, running, biking, tennis, stock market, plays, classical music, concerts, nature, family 81 coffee. Seaching for equivalent female life partner, 35*47 ish.

eclectic taste, reliable fire starter, enjoy antiquing. Me: above 81 shy, over worked supervisor, student, most sports, avid reader 81 junk collector, intense to laid-back, some surprises.

SINGLE PARENT DAD, 51 , ENGINEER, having fun, but needs someone special for myself. She’s hopefully slender, tall or petite, an independent thinker who enjoys humor and verbal jousting. Age open. 2200

COUNT DRACULA SEEKS MINA TO BITE into love. SWPM, 42 , blue-eyed, active night creature wants directions straight to the SWF soul mate’s heart. Remember, true love never dies. 2210

GOLDILOCKS DESIRED FOR STORYBOOK life w / attractive, successful, SWPM, 50, NS, teddy bear. Great book, but needs attractive, slim, intelligent, avid skier, biker, ballroom dancer, traveler to make best-seller. 2204 48 , PROFESSIONAL, 6' i ”, FIT, reason ably sane, equitably pragmatic with a mild streak of silliness. Seeking attrac tive, slender lady to share our laughter and, if simpatico, commitment. Call or write. 2208

MONTPELIER/MAD RIVER SJM, 4 3 . seeks loving friendship. Let's dance, play in the garden, share quiet times and wild adventures. 2209

TWO REGULAR GUYS, SWM, 3 6 & 3 7 , NS, self-employed, four-season outdoor athletes. Literate, articulate. Comfort able in big cities or backwoods. World travelers, one cynical, one very sin cere— both irreverent. Seeking two active, bright women for friendship, adventure, snowball fights. 2177

HEY, WAKE UP! INSTEAD OF READING these ads and doing nothing because you assume that there are only strange, maladjusted guys advertising, try calling me. 1 hate smoky bars, and 1 love to play outside. I’m athletic, welleducated, sane. SWM, 37 , NS, vegetari an, loveable. 2178

THE FROST IS ON THE PUMPKIN FOR this mid-life teacher/writer. Lettuce meet in the garden 81 dig some carrots & turnip up. It beets me why not! 2170

"BOB" SEEKS “CONNIE." OLD PUNK/ skinhead, recently singled, ISO “Betty” to skank with. Talking is good, too. I’m 27 , NS, veggie with ink. Lydia Lunch, Cock Sparrer, Specials. Ctrl. VT, but do drive to Burlington. 2187

SWP, 3 3 , WANTS TO MEET GREAT SWF,

22-281'sh, for weekends, friendship, din ners, sports, reading, nights, dancing, more. I’m tall, fit, witty, handsome. You have brains, beauty, a casual soul. Willing? 2161

The

secure, monogamous w / great place, 40’ boat, Flynn membership, ISO intelligent, pretty, sensual F, 30-40. 2115

PROGRESSIVE, SMART, LITERATE SM,

45 (attractive & fit, tool), ISO happy,

2135 SENSITIVE, ROMANTIC, HONEST SWPM,

SWM, 40 , HONEST, HUMOROUS, sec

38, 5’n ”, 195 lbs., brown hair, green

ond-shift worker, enjoys outdoors, movies, long rides, cards, coffee, cook ing, golf, wine and weekend getaways. If this sounds like you, please call so we can talk! 2116

NSP, ATTRACTIVE, HEALTHY, FIT, slen der, Burlington area, 50, with full head of hair, spiritual, energetic, enthusias tic, veggie, musician, dancer, hiker, meditator, reader. Loves culture, heart felt communication, intimacy and matu rity. 2142

SWM, 36 , NS. PHILOSOPHICALLY practi cal seeks absurdly impractical; farmer seeks concert pianist; Luddite seeks Fran Drescher; Dangerfield seeks Rachel Carson; Groucho seeks Hepburn; knuckledragger seeks ditz with tits; Alberich seeks Rhine maiden; Ralph seeks Josephine; earth seeks ethereal; Yin seeks Yang. 1 seek you. Phone home. 2143

SENSITIVE, DEEPLY INTUITIVE, athletic, grounded, spontaneous, musical, can did, playful, cute SWM, 37 , NS, vege tarian. Deep love of nature, animals, dancing, swimming and intimacy. ISO LTR w / sparkling, self-aware woman who likes to exercise multidimensionally. What does that mean? 2099

DO YOU LIKE SUN, SWIMMING, SAILING more than snow? Adventurer and pro fessional photographer heading south for the winter. Are you adventurous, sensual, playful, 28*4oish? Let’s ren dezvous. 2117

HONEST, INTELLIGENT & GENTLE WPM.

6’, 170 lbs., 45. Seeking my e q u a lbold, adventurous, self-confident, spontaneous, humorous, optimistic, appreciative & fit. Chitt./Add. Co. 2103

DARK 81 ALLURING WANTED: soft & sweet, mild to wild, fun, attractive BHW, 28-40, F, great smile/eyes/figure to be my other half. I’m a SWM, tall, good-looking, desireable, warm-heart ed, great kisser & then some. 2105 QUIET, SENSITIVE, NURTURING SM, 34 , physician into classical music, out doors, seeking spiritual (non-dogmatic) F counterpart, 25- 30, for hiking/camping trips...maybe more? 2109

Personal o f the W eek wins dinner for tw o at

NICE GUYS FINISHING LAST

let’s make something lasting. SWDM,

42, 6 ’, fit, handsome, giving, financially

hip and adventurous F for active fun (biking, dancing, music, backpacking, skiing...), travel, stimulating conversa tion, other sensual pleasures, and painting the town pink! Enjoying garlic, tequila, questionable humor, and playing music helpful. 2 1 2 0 _____________

eyes, energetic, active. Enjoys biking, hiking, golfing, dining out, movies and traveling. Loves long romantic walks & cuddling on the couch. ISO SWPF, 3540, with similar interests. If you’re the one, give me a call. 2139

MhMjncd men seeking women”

SWPM, 38 , TALL, N S - HIKING. BIKING.

has come to an end. We’re taking over. Looking for a great lady to help this SWM, 25, start the revolution. Let’s start a great cause.

2199

: O u iJx r Gcar Cxchangs used • closeout • new 191 Bank S t, Burlington 860-0190

LOVE KNOWS MANY HIDDEN PATHS. Romantic, handsome, successful, very fit. Simply single, 42, with a heart of gold. Must be attractive, together, 30+, with many interests. ISO a pleasant surprise? Me, too! 2074_______________

LETS GO FISHING! SWM, 38, brown

diverse, culturally varied, politically independent and spiritually unorthodox NS M, 45, ISO kindred NS free-spirited F for friendship and more. Age & eth nicity irrelevant. Nonconformists encouraged. 2081_____________________

LOOKING FOR THE DAUGHTER OF THE devil himself; looking for an angel in white. SWM, fun, witty, playful, loyal, ambitious, romantic, wants to meet woman w / similar qualities to share life on the road less traveled. 2090_______

SWPCM, PEACE, SHARING, TRUST, friendship, love. Is this what you seek? This 36 YO seeks like-minded F, 29- 39, who is still searching. 2089___________

DO YOU SING IN THE SHOWER? SWM,

26, prof, musician, seeks alluring siren for harmony 81 music making on an acoustic wilderness adventure. 2091 MY LUVE IS LIKE A RED, RED ’VETTE with the top down in June. My luve is like the fine green bud’s coiling sweet perfume. And fair art thou my bonnie lass as down the slopes she fly; and I will love her still my dear ’cause she makes the best moonshine! 2094

AFFECTIONATE AND ATTRACTIVE SWM,

30, like trying new things, enjoys danc ing, travel, a few sports & life. ISO S/DWF who’s honest, sexual, with a great smile. 2098_____________________

42 YO, 5 *9 ", 215 LBS., ENJOYS DINING, movies, dancing, outdoors, day trips and cuddling by a nice quiet video with someone special. ISO LTR. 2096

SHARE THE MILLENNIUM CELEBRATION with me at any romantic location in the world. Professional, 58, extremely fit in mind & body. Economically well- off. Age not a factor. Carpe diem. 2063

1110 Shelburne Rd., So. Burlington 651-8774

W inner also receives a gift certificate for a FREE Day H iker’s Guide to VT from

blading and skiing. Sure I like all that, but also enjoy fine and casual dining, a good margarita, and lazy weekend mornings under the blankets. ISO attractive SWPF, 30-38, NS„ to partici pate in some/all of the above. 2121 hair & eyes, seeks F for companionship & unlimited fun. I love long rides in the country and warm nights at home. Help fill the hole. 2083_______________

Ribs • Rotlsserie Chicken & Morel 4 p.m. — 10 p.m.

UNDER THE RAINBOW. Ethnically

SWPM, 40 , SEEKING GROWN-UP SWF,

30s, for companionship, openness, friendship, honesty, romance, trust, love and family. Must like conversation, books, music, travel, movies, exercise, hiking. Please respond if you’re tem pt ed. I feel awkward writing this, too. Written responses preferred. 2078

A ssdw q w om en SMART, CREATIVE, PASSIONATE, HIPPIE femme looking for fun, active butch to laugh, bike, ski, travel, eat healthy, stay sober, talk deep and touch a lot. Burl, area, 40- 55. 2176________________

PRETTY, HONEST, EDUCATED SWF WHO

A oekinq tw n GWM, 41 , SEEKING PHYSICALLY chal lenged G/BiPM, 25-45, not giving up, who enjoys life, for friendship and pos sible LTR. Intellectual stimulation just as important as physical in a relationship. 2201____________________________

UVM QUEER, GWM, 19 , 6 *2 ", 165 LBS., brown/hazel, student, activist, revolu tionary. Cute and sincere, somewhat shy, loves foreign/vintage films and theater. Seeking GWM, 18- 25, who’s comfortable with themselves. 2207

BiWM ISO THIN G/BIM, 2 5 -40 ; FIRSTtime encounter. Walks, read, films, laugh, massage 8r play. NS, ND 81 open mind necessary. Discretion please. 2213 GWM, BOTTOM BEAR, SMOKER, 3 RD shifter looking for LTR or just some fun w / a hot top. I’m 6 ’ 2”, 270 lbs., #3 buzzed brown hair, blue eyes, pierced, tattooed and hairy. 2185 ________ AFFECTIONATE GWM, MID-20 S, BROWN eyes, blonde hair, 6’, 190 lbs. Wants it all! Deserves to be spoiled & to have someone to spoil in return. ISO more than one-night-stand. 2158____________

GWM SEEKING THIN, A/B/HM, 18 - 2 5 , for

loves life, philosophy, writing, cooking, skiing seeks kindred spirit for potentially LTR. Burl, area only. 2160________

new experiences. Enjoy videos, mas sages and quiet times. Discretion expected and assured. 2168___________

SMART, FUNNY, POLITICALLY AWARE,

BIWM, 3 5 , 170 LBS., BEER DRINKER, likes history channel, old cars, good times. Seeks same for First-time on other side. Must be masculine, discreet and healthy. 2169

attractive, creative, SF, early 30s, NS, ND, seeks like-minded SF to share laughs, cultural activities, conversations & more. 2167_________________________

I AM GIRLIE, HEAR ME ROAR! s’8” , auburn hair, 130 lbs., 19, loves to do a little dance, make a little love, & get down, ISO the keymaster, GWF, 18- 23. 2138_________________________________

MID-FORTIES, ARTISTIC, CREATIVE, sen sitive GWF, ISO LTR. I’m sick o f being alone 81 lonely; need someone to light en 81 brighten my heart 81 life. 2082

PMT ATTRACTIVE, 30 S, FULL OF ENERGY & spark, ISO super nice guy who’s also 3oish 81 looking for something new. You’ve gotta live life, love sports, trav eling & arguing your point. You work hard & want the best. Ditto. Burl. 2162 TALL & TENDER GWM, 28 , 6 ’2 “, brown/ hazel, into spirituality, sci-fi, Chinese, jeans and travel, seeking man w / smile 81 personality. Try something & some one new: me. 2124

Mostly UnfiabulcusSocial Life of} Ethan Green

b y Eric O rn e r

^T'S SATuhDAY AFTerNooN ANP ETHAM 8c povo HAVe SPENT The PAY WITH THE REALTol:

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page

SEVEN DAYS

October

28,1998

w w w . 4 r*M « w jL ii i u n .C m w

mm.

to respond to a personal ad call I - 9 O O - J We’re open 24 hours a day! $ 1.9 9 a m inute, m ust be

non Aookinq m en , c a n t SAIL THE GREEK ISLANDS, ROMANCE,

EARLY RETIREE GWM, BLONDE, 6 *2 ",

CU (M 35 & F 26) SEEKS ATTRACTIVE

190 lbs., sincere & handsome. Young looking 81 acting. Very athletic— biking,

female that wants to explore sensual pursuits. Safe, discreet, upscale, fun, attractive CU awaits your reply. 2183

skiing, swimming, scuba, workouts. Seeking friendship w / similar interests. Open to possible relationship. 2064

comfort, support, fun, adventure & sharing life’s experiences. A dream I want to share w / a special man. Masculine, 33, sailing addict, nature lover. LTR. Uneffeminate, friends o f any disposition. 2102______________________

GWM, 3 3 , INTO GOLF, GOOD WINE,

I’M NOT FUSSY ABOUT BEING GAY, TO

any race, for first-time encounters for fun and good times, possible LTR. 2071

also have fun in gay terms... A future without gay love? “ Not being gay or real is the furthest thing from my mind!" 2085_________________________ _

good food, electronics. Not fit, but working at it, and seeking friendship, fun, maybe more. Call if you’re under 40 and like to laugh. 2079__________

GWM, 38 , s’li" , 157 LBS., ISO G/BIM,

GWM, 3 6 . NS, ENJOYS TRAVELING, hik ing, staring at the stars, skiing, walking and just chilling out. Not into bars or large parties. ISO 18-40 YO for friendship or possible LTR. 2084____________

LIFE’S WONDERS. BIWM, 5 7 , 5 ’io ", 169 lbs., blue eyes, looking for other Bi or straight men. Let's explore the possibil ities. No head games. Please call. 2073

who can *uck me up. Age, sex, race, species unimportant. 2148

COUPLE SEEKS HOT, YOUNG, attractive

WM, 41 , AMATEUR PHOTOGRAPHER, ISO female subjects) for steamy photo session and possibly more. Age, race and looks not as important as attitude. 2192_________________________________

MaWM, 5 7 . 5’8 *. 160 LBS., GRAY HAIR, blue eyes, NS, dean, discreet, seeks Ma/SF for daytime adult games, possible LTR. 2190_________________________

EQUALS IN LIFE, YOUR SLAVE IN LOVE Younger man, handsome, healthy and hot, seeks fit, assertive, playful woman who knows what she likes. Your plea sure is my command! 2197

WCU, 50 , ISO CULTURED FEMALE com

M.P. WITH THE BLACK CANE & GOLDEN

panion to join us in bicycling, conver sation, dining, theater (not opera), antiquing and other varied interests. Day & weekend trips, age 42-60 +/-. any race, NS/ND, social drinker OK. This could be the start o f a new friend ship. 2086

smile, Hope that your foot is healing quickly and neatly, and that your heart is doing well. 2217____________________

1 A plf

13 5 PEARL, 10/ 10 . YOU: BLACK SHIRT & jeans. Exchanged glances. Was stand ing near door when you left. Saw you on street and asked, “ How’s it going?” Wanted to talk more. 2172____________

college stud for stud services. 21

DOMINANT WM, 55 . LOOKING FOR woman or couple to participate in bondage scene w / other people. Medium build. Must like Canada, travel, sailing, meeting new people. Relationship possible. 2146___________ LEOPARDESSE WITH ROLY-POLY CUB

GBM, 38 , NS/ND, 6 ’, 180 LBS., GOODlooking, straight-acting, in good shape, seeks GM, 18-40, NS/ND, for fun, possi ble relationship. Please respond. 2c

WANTED: KICK-ASS CHESS PARTNER

appreciates other species (M & F) for reflective tidal musings, aphrodisiac meals, and high meadow romps. Mammals preferred (please, no dogs), but will consider dolphins and other intelligent creatures. Definite NO to snakes, leeches, hornets and inverte brates! 2100 _________

BIWM, 22 , 5 T , 135 LBS-. SUBMISSIVE sissy boy ISO Ms, Fs, CUs to have fun with. Age/looks/race unimportant. 2111 MaWCU SEEKS SINGLE, PETITE, BIF for erotic encounters. Race unimportant. He is tall, dark hair and blue eyes. She is petite with fair skin and green eyes.

2122

l a i t a a a

18 o r older.

YMCA, WEEKDAY MORNINGS. YOU ARE always smiling and friendly. Love your neon Hawaiian shirt. Care for a tropical getaway? Islands would be ideal, but l*d settle for coffee! 2194

AD # 2 17 9 , THE PAST THREE MONTHS have been the best three months ever. I’m so glad we met. The love I have for you grows stronger every minute of every day. Thank you for coming into my life. 2196_________________________

ALL AMERICAN, 10/ 10 , A M . YOU HAD

“IS THIS SEAT TAKEN?" SAW YOU W/ girlfriend at Church St. Tavern, Sat. night, 10/ 17 , in gray turtleneck and jeans. Me: in beige overcoat and suit after show at Flynn. How about coffee, dinner, dance sometime? 2214_________

BEAUTIFUL BLONDE! YOU WALKED BY the window o f Leunig^s restaurant on Church, Monday evening, 10/ 19. Our eyes met; would like to meet you! The handsome gent in the blue shirt. 2205

dark red hair, really tall 81 sexy. Said your name was Cindy. Me: very dark skin 81 tots of muscles. Didn’t see a ring. Would you like to meet? I’m what a real man looks like. 2173____________

HEY, BECKY! IT'S BEEN TWO SWEET years since we bumped into each other. Remember the taste of our first kiss? I look for you everywhere I go. Marry me on a beach in Bora Bora? I love you. Please command m e—Tom.

2182

PENNY, FRI., 10/ 16 . WE MET, ATE, drank, danced, connected on several levels, 81 had fun. I want to do some more. Call me! I can’t find you. 2206

I if

To respond to Letters Only ads:

ATTRACTIVE, SMART, HEALTHY, spiritu

RETIRED DPM ISO GRAY-HAIRED LADY,

DWPM, 44 , ISO S/DWPF. WE BOTH love

SWM, SNOW BIRD, 5 *7 * . EASY-GOING,

Seal your response in an envelope, write box # on the outside and place in another envelope with $5 for each response. Address to: PERSON TO PERSON cjo SEVEN DAYS, P.O. Box 1164, Burlington, VT 05402

al, educated, passionate, French DF, 40, 5*4", 115 lbs., ISO S/DWM, 35- 45. ND, NS, NA, to kiss, dance, swim, bike, laugh, travel, dining, reading, music, XC-skiing. Looking for LTR. Box 365

55 -65, who’s warm, open, sharing & fit, who, like me, reads broadly, enjoys continuing to learn, loves classical music, has sense of the ridiculous 81 enjoys country/city 8t travel. Box 380

laughing, biking, cooking, arts, philo sophical conversation, loud parties, quiet moments. Isn’t it time we met? Photo, please. Box 373________________

good habits, likes biking and giving joy. ISO female, 40- 50, to share Class-A full-time RV living situation. Flying south soon. Box 361

CAN YOU COOK? I CANT HUNGRY NSPF,

SHELL WALLY CLEAVER MEETS JOHN

33, loves dogs, movies, music, restau

Travolta. Stuffing: Kurt (Vonnegut), Carson (Rachel), Kramer (Cosmo). Genuine, nutty, very fit, conversant, deceptively clean-cut quasi-vegan, 26, loves writing silly songs, hiking, biking, reading and cooking; seeks smart, witty, confident, fit Burl, girl, 21- 28, for friendship first. Box 381_______________

rants. Fit, friendly and fun. ISO NSPM, 28- 38, for possible LTR. Box 358______

KINDNESS, LAUGHTER. ROMANCE?

INTELLIGENT, FUN-LOVING, PLUS-SIZED

Attractive, plus-sized SWF artist, 39, seeking special guy, 30-45 , to create awesome atmosphere of trust, affec tion, fun and friendship/LTR. We love the outdoors, music, food and movies. Humor required. We can really create magic! Ctrl. VT/Burt. area. Box 377

woman, 54 , seeks hopeful, secure, loving man, grounded, but reaching for stars. Love ballroom dancing? Movies? Good food? Feminist? Appreciate Christian, other theologies? Love laughter, music, pets? Box 359______________

FIG. lA ASSEMBLE LIVING DOLL; Attach

DWPF, 40, NS, enjoys dancing, working out, outdoors, life. ISO attractive S/DWPM, fit, NS, 34-42, similar inter ests. Please include photo. Box 360

long slinky legs to svelte torso, glue thick blonde hair onto fair head, paint full lips, blue eyes, program bawdy attitude, write for date. Box 374_______

DWF, 42 , EUROPEAN NATIVE. I’m long ing to find a nice, honest American man to share the rest of my life with, here in VT. Box 368___________________

COUNTRY WOMAN LOOKING FOR part ner. Are you 55-65, with sense of humor, compassion? Inquiring mind, lean body, chainsaw a +. Box 370

DWM, 46 . 5 *6 ", 4 1 LBS.. FIT AND LIKES to run, bike and hike, Buddhist, rea sonably successful professional, likes art— Monet 81 Rembrandt—classical music and baseball. I lead a quiet, sim ple lifestyle. Seeking an intelligent, cul tured, emotionally secure F for a gentle relationship. Please write first. Box 378

A HEART OF GOLD. Very attractive, fit,

WHATEVER YOU CAN DO OR DREAM you

nm m m

TALL, HANDSOME ARTIST, POET, Taoist monk and weekend father, 49, seeking companionship w / beautiful woman, any age, race or color, with a curious mind, open heart, soft style and imagi nation. Box 376

creet. Seeking F for .pen pal, maybe more. Will consider any suggestions offered. Meetings possible. I’m real 81 safe. Your feelings considered. Box 372

OVER-EDUCATED M, MID-50 S, A TAD offbeat, but stable, civil & responsible; reads, is intellectual, funny, happy, handy, productive. Seeks happy, welleducated woman, 30- 51, NS. Essential good match of psyche 81 soul is the goal. Must like pets, outdoors; on the fit side. Picture appreciated. Box 366

WELL-ROUNDED SWM, 26 , LOVES GOLF, football & other sports, ISO petite SWF, 23-30, to enjoy slow days &. hot nights. Please send photo. Box 367

SWM, 48 , SUM SENSUOUS. HEALTHY,

can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. SWM, 35, live simply, travel widely, ski, climb, bike, seek adventurous F. Box 371__________

seeking submissive, passive,B/AF, any age, smoker/drinker OK. Open-minded, no kids or marriage. Steady weekend companion. Describe yourself. I’m not abusive. Box 363_____________________

FATHER OF GIRLS SEEKING GRACIOUS,

WORD LOVER SEEKS WITTY WOMAN

articulate intimacy with a southern Chittenden Co. beige lady. This cheerful entrepreneur is starting over in every way. Can discuss history, nature, finance, architecture, health. Box 375

IF YOU LIKE TO WISH FOR 40 ISH DEEP dish of Pisces passion, too precious to waste on anyone but you, who are insightful, creative, affectionate 81 hon orable, please write. Box 369

WM, MID-40 S. VERY HEALTHY AND dis

with passion for language, letters, music, walking, tea and marmalade, old houses, rock gardens, cats, slow food, fountain pens, elegant clothing, tall slim men. Box 362

INTELLIGENT, PLUS-SIZED WOMAN, 50 s, great sense o f humor, seeks loving, respectful relationship with GF, 45+, who enjoys laughing, holding hands, snuggling, movies, concerts, dancing, dogs 81 cats. No smokers. Box 356

ONE-MAN GUY, 3 6 . 6 ’, 190 LBS., GOODlooking, fit, intelligent, has lots to offer. Looking for that special male to build a quality relationship with. Handsome loners encouraged to reply. Box 379______________________________

GWM, 5 ’u " , BRN7BLUE, 170 LBS., seeking GM for discreet encounters. Open-minded males with sense of humor needed to reply. Box 347

BiM LOOKING FOR KINKY WOMEN AND men who dress 8t act like women for fun! Couples welcome. Box 364

4 digit box numbers can be contacted either through voice mail or by letter. 3 digit box numbers can only be contacted by letter. Send letter along w/ $5 to PO Box 1164, Burlington, VT 05402 LOVE IN CYBERSPACE. POINT YOUR WEB BROWSER TO

http ://WWW.SEVENDAYSVT.COM

TO SUBMIT YOUR MESSAGE ON-LINE.

How to place your FR EE personal ad with Person to Person

IpQhAOn tD flcAAtm

• F il l

o u t t h i s f o r m a n d m a il it t o :

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8 0 2 . 8 6 5 . 1 0 1 5 . P L E A S E C H E C K A P P R O P R IA T E C A T EG O R Y . Y O U W IL L R E C E IV E Y O U R B O X # 8 P A S S C O D E B Y M A IL.

• F i r s t 3 0 w o r d s a r e F R E E w it h p e r s o n t o p e r s o n ( 4 5 T h u r s d a y ), a d d it io n a l w o r d s a r e 5 0 # e a c h x 4 w e e k s . • F r e e r e t r i e v a l 2 4 h o u r s a d a y t h r o u g h t h e p r iv a t e y o u p l a c e YOUR AD.) it ’ s s a f e , c o n f i d e n t i a l AND FU N !

w o r d s i f f a x e d / s u b m i t t e d o n -l i n e o n

8 0 0 # . (D e t a i l s

w i l l b e m a il e d t o y o u w h e n

How to respond to a personal ad: • C H O O S E Y O U R F A V O R IT E A D S A N D N O T E T H E IR B O X N U M B E R S .

•C A LL 1 - 9 0 0 - 3 7 0 - 7 1 2 7 F R O M A T O U C H -T O N E P H O N E . • F o l l o w in g t h e v o ic e p r o m p t s , .

C onfidential Inform ation

t - K

(w e n e e d t h is t o r u n y o u r a d )

Z i p _______

C A L L S CO ST

W ORD PERSONAL AD

N a m e _____

Ad d r ess. STA TE.

C i t y ______

t t

PHONE

p u n c h in t h e 4 - d ig it b o x # o f t h e a d y o u w is h to R E S P O N D T O , O R YO U MAY B R O W S E A S P E C I F I C C A T E G O R Y .

$ 1 . 9 9 P E R M IN U T E . Y O U M U S T B E O V E R 1 8 Y E A R S O L D .

• A D S W IT H A 3 - D I G I T B O X # C A N B E C O N T A C T E D T H R O U G H T H E M A I L . S E A L Y O U R R E S P O N S E IN A N E N V E L O P E , W R I T E T H E B O X # O N T H E O U T S I D E A N D P L A C E IN A N O T H E R E N V E L O P E W I T H $ 5 F O R E A C H R ES P O N S E. A D D R ES S TO : B O X # _____ , P . O . B O X 1 1 6 4 , B U R L I N G T O N , V T 0 5 4 0 2 .

P L E A S E , A V A L ID A D D R E S S . IF AD EX C E E D S 3 0 W O R D S , S E N D $ . 5 0 PE R E X T R A W 9 R B .X 4 W E E K ? ; HE CONTENT OF. AND A l l RESU LTIN G CLAIMS MADE AGAINST S E V E N EMNIFY AND HO ENT AND VOICE ERSO N ADVERTISEMENT AND VOICE MESSAGE.

__________ *tB S Ha ^ T O ^ ‘Rto N , *DVEHCT°»EUiNTENtJ:£

Gu i d e l i n e s : free

PERSON.”

Two FREE weeks for:

Four FREE weeks for: Wo m e n s e e k i n g m e n MEN SEEKING WOMEN WOMEN SEEKING WOMEN MEN SEEKING MEN

October 2 8 , 1 9 9 8

I SPY OTHER |

| C H EC K H E R E IF YO U ’ D P R E F E R “ LETTERS O N LY”

SEVEN DAYS

page 51

-N6?:

Get Your Pot III1 I Associate store

This pottery is currently being made deep in the Amazon jungle. It is hand thrown and fired in a wood fueled kiln at 800 degrees Celsius. It is then hand waxed or painted with natural dyes obtained from tree barks and wild seeds of the Amazon Jungle.

24"(h)

10"(h

6 (h) 4"(h)

Prices range from Reg. 14" to 29900

This Week 11" to 23920 13"(h) 5"(h)

All Rainforest Pottery o/

10 (h) 14"(h)

Off

This week at Pier 1

5"(h)

Associate store

Sale Ends Nov. 7,1998

52 Church Street On the Marketplace Burlington 863-4644

Mon.-Fri. 10a-9p Saturday 10a-7p Sunday 12p-5p